I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while. I know where this story is going, it's just hard to write up some simple chapters to fill in some time so it's not drama every chapter.

Chapter 13: Dr Flynn & Kenny

Since Christian had to spend the night with Phoebe due to her nightmare, he decided she couldn't wait until her leg was healed before going to see Flynn. She clearly wasn't coping with these past events so after two weeks of being home, he took her to the good doctors office. Phoebe, of course, decided to protest. She thought that by seeing Flynn, it would make her seem like a crazy person and she didn't want that to happen. She and Christian argued all week until she finally understood that she needed help sooner rather than later and spent yesterday evening curled up next to her father watching terrible television as a way of apologising and claiming everything was fine between them. Like the night she had the nightmare, she rested her head on his shoulder but no other contact was made. Her new fear prevented that.

They sat together in the waiting room of Dr Flynn's office, waiting for him to finish off with his previous patient before she had to sit and talk for an hour. Finally, Flynn appeared in the doorway of his office and called her in. Christian followed her and sat down next to her on the sofa.

"Hello, Phoebe," Dr Flynn said politely. "Your dad's briefly told me what happened and thought it would be best if we talked about it. I must admit, I was surprised when he said this. He always seemed to want to keep you kids away from me." He tried a small joke. Phoebe gave a sad smile, knowing why her father sees Dr Flynn and the reasons why he wanted to keep them away. It was his demons he was fighting and he wanted to protect his family from them. Now, they become her demons and there was nothing he could do about it. "So, first of all, I know this may seem intimidating and uncomfortable, but I promise to make you feel as at ease as possible. And, I'm sure you know this, no matter what you may say to me, will not be disclosed to anyone else. Not even your parents unless you want them to know. If you want, one, or both, of your parents can join us for a session or we can just talk one-on-one. Does this make sense?" she nodded. Christian smiled at her. "Do you have any questions before we start?"

"How long will I be coming here?" she asked as soon as he shut up. John looked at Christian.

"As long as you need to. Until we all feel you're ready to take charge of your feelings and know how to cope," Flynn said.

"But, it will take time, Cupcake. We can't rush this healing process. I've been in therapy for years," Christian added.

"Ok. But, what if I don't want to talk?" Phoebe asked. Both men sighed.

"We can't force you to talk, Phoebe," Christian started.

"But it might help you feel better and help with your recovery." Flynn finished. Phoebe sighed.

"Ok, whatever. Erm...Wo-" she wondered how she was going to ask the next question in her mind and was silent until Flynn pushed her to ask. "Would we have to keep the door shut?"

That took Christian and Flynn by surprise. Christian knew she had been locked in a cold, dark room alone for two weeks, but he hadn't realised that she didn't like closed doors anymore. In fact, once she heard everyone go to bed, she would re-open the door to the spare room just so she wouldn't feel trapped. Flynn, however, didn't know if the door was locked or how it had affected her and thought about how he could answer her.

"Well, we do tend to keep the door shut to ensure the session is kept private, so no-one can overhear what's being said," he said. "But if you felt more comfortable with it open, we could leave it. Or we can open all the windows and have the outside door open." He suggested. In his office was a newly built-in glass door that led outside to a small garden area, where people could wait for their session instead of inside. She nodded and looked down at her knotted fingers in her lap. "Is there anything else you want to ask?" she shook her head. "Ok, shall we get started?" she shrugged. Flynn looked at Christian then back at Phoebe. "Phoebe would you like your dad to stay or would you like to talk with just me?"

Phoebe didn't need to think, but she didn't know what to say. She looked at her father then back at Flynn and said one word. "Alone." Christian nodded and stood before leaving the room, kissing her forehead and said he'd be right outside. Flynn looked at her after making sure the door was shut.

"Ok, Phoebe," he said. "I take it there's a reason you wanted to talk alone?" she nodded and her asked why that is. After taking a deep breath, she spoke.

"The last time I saw my dad before all this happened, we were busy arguing. And now he's acting like nothing's happened. Let's just say I feel slightly awkward."

"Have you tried talking to him about it?"

"What would I say? I've told him I forgive him for the show. In all honestly, I'd rather forget about that stupid argument we had and get over it. And, I'd rather move on and get over these last couple of weeks."

"But, do you think that would help you?"

"I don't think re-living the past will!" she snapped. She immediately felt guilty for snapping at him but he told her not to worry. He had been dealing with her father for many years. "I guess I just don't understand why people think that talking is going to solve anything. It's happened and it's not going to change."

"I can see where you're coming from. But maybe by talking it enables you to let out your thoughts and there's less of a burden on your shoulders."

"But no one will understand how I'm truly feeling."

"Your father does."

"But it's too personal talking to him. He just explains how he's going to protect me from all the demons in the world. No one else will understand."

"True. But by talking, they will get a better understanding. Let's talk about before you were taken. I understand your music class put on a music show the Saturday before?" she smiled and nodded. "How did that go?"

"The show itself went really well. The only downside was that dad wasn't there. He had important business to attend to." She paused. "I was so mad at him and I didn't fail to let him know. I thought he wasn't coming for me." She wiped a stray tear off her cheek. "I honestly thought he was so mad at me, he was punishing me by not looking for me."

"You should know, that no matter what happens between any of you and your dad, he will always be there," Flynn said sternly. One thing he can say about Christian is he would go to hell and back in order to protect his family. She nodded in understanding. "So what happened after the show?"

"We went home and argued. Went out on Sunday for Nick's birthday and argued some more," she shrugged.

"I heard you jumped off the back of the yacht." She giggled. "I think you nearly gave your dad a coronary from the way he was talking about it." She looked up at him shocked. "He came to see me while you were missing. I shouldn't tell you this, but he was in a right state. Felt so out of control and we both know how much your father hates not having control."

"He can't function without it," she gave a sad smile. She suddenly stood up to look out of the window, eyes half closed as the sun was shining through. "I'm so much like him. I want to be in control and I was so scared. It was dark. And cold." She stopped to control her breathing. "I was so hungry. It burned. Really burned." An image of Owen burning her flew threw her mind and her breathing increased. She was having a panic attack and she couldn't control it. She suddenly screamed and fell to the floor, curling up into a small ball, whimpering. Flynn knelt down in front of her and tried to calm her down by talking but when that didn't work, went and got Christian. He ran in and knelt next to her and put his hand on hers. She flinched but didn't pull away.

"Cupcake?" he said. She looked at him, eyes wide with fear.

"He's here. Daddy, he's here," she cried. He shushed her and explained that Owen wasn't there; it was just an unwanted image running through her head. She calmed after a while and understood that she was safe.

"Phoebe, no one is going to harm you. You're safe now," Flynn said. Her breathing calmed and she rested her head against Christian.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. Christian shushed her and told her there's nothing to apologise for. After she calmed she stood and went back to the sofa. Christian sat down next to her.

"Phoebe, can you tell me what that was about?" Flynn asked. In order to help her, he needed information.

"I just had a flashback," she whispered wiping her tears. "I saw Owen, again. He was smoking and drinking and I'd pissed him off, somehow." Christian chose to ignore her language, given the circumstances.

"He was always pissed off," Christian said.

"Christian, if you're going to stay, I need you to keep quiet for the moment. Let Phoebe talk without interrupting." Flynn said and Christian nodded, angry that he'd been told off like a school boy. "Carry on, Phoebe."

"What else is there to say?" she snapped. "He burned me with cigarettes. That's not going to change. I'm home and safe now, why do I need to talk about what happened? Is breaking down part of the healing process because if it is, I'm not interested!" she shouted the last part.

"Phoebe, calm down," Christian said gently.

"No, I will not bloody calm down. I don't want to re-live everything that's happened, it's bad enough I get that in my dreams!" she snapped at her father and then quickly clamped her hand over her mouth. In her anger she got carried away and blurted out the one thing she wanted to keep secret. Christian knew about the one dream but he didn't know it was an every night occurrence since before she came home.

Flynn just gave a small smile, knowing he had just got her to open up about something. The question now was, what technique should he use to get her to explain it?

"What happened in your dreams Phoebe?" he asked.

"He's just there. Sometimes he's hitting me, sometimes he's burning me. Last night though, he was... but that never... and I couldn't..."

"Phoebe, calm down. Tell me what happened in your dream last night,"

"He was... touching me... and doing stuff. But that never happened so why did it happen in my dream," she saw Christian tense next to her and she knew he wanted to go and kill the fucker.

"Did you ever feel like he would?" Flynn asked ignoring Christians reaction. He would deal with that in their session later. Phoebe nodded.

"I overheard them talking one night. Owen wanted me but Jack threatened to kill him if he touched me." She tried to control her breathing again, looking at her father in the corner of her eye. "He said I had an amazing body, like Ella." Christian's eyes widened.

"Ok, Phoebe. Do you think that maybe because you know Owen had these thoughts that in your dreams, or nightmares I should say, it actually happened?" Flynn asked ignoring Christian again.

"I guess it's possible. But how do I get the dreams to stop?"

"I'm afraid I can't answer that. It took your father years for his dreams to stop, but you've had a much better start to life and have so many happy memories to hold onto." She nodded. He turned to Christian. "Christian do you have any questions?"

"Not today, John. Maybe I'll have a think and let you know when I come this evening?" Flynn nodded in agreement.

... ... ...

Back in the car, Phoebe released a breath she didn't realise she was holding. Did she really just tell Dr Flynn about her dreams? Is she going to see him more often so he can help her move on? She sighed, feeling confused. She strangely felt better after talking to someone. How does that make sense? Her reverie was broken by her father.

"Cupcake? I'm proud of you. That couldn't have been easy."

"Do I have to go again?" she asked. He sighed and reached over to grab her hand and she willingly let him hold it.

"I'm afraid so. Phoebe, just know it's not because your mother and I don't want to deal with it. It's because we love you and we're too closely involved. But we will be here for you, no matter what. If it's the middle of the night and you need one of us, then come and get us. Or ring us if you can't get up the stairs, ok?" she nodded but said nothing else on the subject. He sighed and took hold of her other hand. She let him. "Phoebe, you know if I could take this all away, I would, right?" she narrowed her eyes.

"Of course I do. Dad you're not blaming yourself are you?" she asked though she had already figured out the answer. His silence confirmed it. "Dad, it's not your fault. I should have suspected something was wrong when I got the text from Barrell. If it's anyone's fault it's mine." She started with the self-loathing. Christian squeezed her hands to get her to look at him.

"Don't you ever say that, young lady! It is not your fault that my past came back to haunt me and hurt you."

"But you've always told us-"

"Phoebe you might as well just stop. You know you will not win this one. It's no one's fault, ok?" he interrupted. She just nodded. Then suddenly broke out into a huge smile. "What are you smiling about?" he asked, though it was with a friendly tone.

"You." She said simply. He just shook his said. Just like your mother, he thought.

... ... ...

"Do you need a hand?"

"No thanks, dad. I got it," Phoebe said climbing out of the car. She couldn't wait until she could get rid of the crutches. The doctor said maybe another two weeks then she wouldn't need two. She may even be able to get rid of both of them all together. She wanted to get rid of both of them before Mia's birthday meal in two weeks, though Christian isn't so sure about it. He was naturally worried that she was going to hurt herself.

"Hi guys. How'd it go?" Ana asked as they entered the kitchen. Phoebe shrugged.

"It went well. I think." Christian said.

"You think?"

"Well, I kicked dad out of the room, so he doesn't know what went on." Phoebe said. She didn't want to worry her mum by telling her about the breakdown she had in Flynn's office. Not with the baby. Christian looked at his daughter and realised why she said that and silently agreed with her thinking.

"Oh, ok. But you're alright?" Ana asked her daughter, who just nodded and went towards the back door. When she was gone Ana turned to Christian. "What really happened?"

"What do you mean?" he asked innocently.

"I've known you for twenty years and I've learnt how to tell when you're lying. And Phoebe's a terrible liar, so what happened?" she demanded. Christian sighed.

"She had a bit of a flashback and broke down in Flynn's office. She did ask me to leave but Flynn couldn't calm her down so I went back in. I helped her calm down a bit and she just spoke to Flynn about what's on her mind. She's fine now but I've made her promise if anything is wrong at all, then she can talk to us. Even if it's the middle of the night."

"Is that all?" she demanded. He nodded and she accepted his answer. "Alright, then. Oh! I think you should know. Kenny's here. He wanted to know if we found anything on Phoebe. He's busy entertaining our nine-year-old on the tennis court. Maybe you should go and get Phoebe?" Christian smiled and nodded, heading towards the meadow, while Ana headed towards their tennis court. Christian had it built when Kate and Elliot started playing and challenging him and Ana to matches. They used it to practise and turns out their children enjoy playing tennis too.

Going to the back of the meadow, he found Phoebe in her spot. He smiled.

"Phoebe?" she looked at him. "I know you've only just come out here, but your mother and I have a surprise for you," he said smiling, reassuringly. She got off her sun lounger and walked back up to the house with her father and entered the kitchen. There she saw her mother fixing some lemonade for Ashley and a teenage looking boy. She didn't know who it was as his back was to her. Ana saw her and smiled.

"So, did you guys have fun outside?" Ana asked the boys. Ashley nodded.

"Yes, Mrs Grey," the boy said. Phoebe froze. She knew that voice. It was Kenny.

"Kenny?" he turned around and gasped.

"Phoebe? You're here?"

"Well, this is my home," she smiled and went to sit down on the stool next to him. "What are you doing here?"

"Kenny came round to see if we'd heard anything from you. He was the only friend who came round during those two weeks," Ana said.

"Don't worry. I didn't tell anyone. Well, only Ava but she already knew," Kenny added.

"You came round?"

"Yeah. You weren't very happy on Monday after everything that happened with Nicky, then falling out with Ava over me then what you said about your dad," he froze and looked at Christian. "Sorry. But then you weren't in for the rest of the week."

"Yeah, bummer. I'm sorry that you were worried."

"It wasn't your fault,"

"Told you!" Christian said like a school boy. Ana glared at him but smiled. "What?" he asked innocently. "I did tell her, it wasn't her fault." Phoebe just looked at him.

"Dad? Shush," she said, smiling, and turned back to Kenny. "Look, I'm sorry I haven't called since being home. Been a little busy getting over stuff."

"Don't apologize. I didn't expect you to. Anyway you don't have my number," he winked. She nudged his shoulder playfully. He looked around the room at her family which didn't go unnoticed.

"Mum, dad, do you mind if we go out in the meadow?" she asked.

"No, go ahead." Ana said and elbowed Christian before he had a chance to warn them to be careful. Kenny got off his stool followed by Phoebe and handed her her crutches. When they were alone in the meadow she saw him relax a little.

"My family make you nervous?"

"No, your mums cool and so is your little brother. Your dad, however, is a little intimidating." She smiled.

"Sorry about that. If it helps, he's like that with everyone." She laughed. He joined in. "I missed you,"

"I missed you too. But you're home now."

"Yeah but dad doesn't want me to leave. Actually, I think he wants to lock me up in a tower until I'm thirty."

"That's every dad who has a little girl." They laughed and sat down in the grass. He stared at her while she watched the grass blow in the wind. "Phoebe, I can only imagine what you went through. Obviously I don't know any details except something happened to your leg," he nodded at her crutches. "But if you ever need someone to talk to about anything, I'm here." She smiled at him.

"Is it a British trait to be caring and wanting to listen?" she joked. He looked confused. "My shrink is also British," she clarified.

"Oh? That bad huh?"

"You can only begin to imagine. I personally don't see the point of talking. It's not going to change what happened."

"I know. I ditched mine when mum went to prison."

"You saw a shrink?" he nodded.

"I couldn't cope with what she was doing, so dad had me see one. And when she got put away and we moved here, I decided I wanted a new start away from therapy. And, I think I've done quite well without it. Considering I've got my friends there for me now." She smiled at him again. "You have a beautiful smile, Phoebe. I wish I could keep it there."

"No matter how hard we try, we can't smile forever. And besides, I haven't had a lot to smile about lately."

"What happened?" he asked concern clear in his voice.

"It was a couple of people from my parents' past. My mum's old boss and the man who was my dad's mums 'boyfriend'." She used her fingers to quote 'boyfriend'. "They hate my parents so they thought they would use me to get back at them."

"Yikes."

"I know. Let's just say that those two weeks of my life are ones I'd rather forget."

"Ok. But if you ever need someone to talk to. I'm here, ok?" she nodded.

"So, less of this morbid stuff. What's school been like without me there? Boring?"

"Actually, I don't think anyone noticed," he joked.

"Funny thing is, I don't think they would have." She replied. "Apparently dad said I was ill and no one would want to get infected so they wouldn't have come round. I'm glad you did though."

"Really?" she nodded. "I'm glad I did too. Though your little brother seems to be energetic." He laughed.

"Ashley?" he nodded. "He loves sport so that explains why. Were you playing soccer or something with him?"

"No, he wanted to play tennis. Though I don't think he knows the rules very well so every point was his."

"He's nine and his main sport is soccer. Tennis is his weakest sport." She nudged his shoulder as she did earlier.

"What's your sport then?" he asked suddenly.

"I'm not a huge fan of sport. Though I mainly do netball and occasionally badminton. How about you? Do you enjoy sport?"

"Not many team sports. I do running and that's rare. Though when your legs heeled I wouldn't mind kicking your butt at badminton?"

"Is that a challenge, Mr Loggins?"

"Yes, of course, Miss Grey."

They sat out in the meadow for a couple of hours talking about all sorts of stuff. Ashley joined them at some point telling Kenny they should have a tennis rematch and he'd go easy on him next time. Phoebe laughed while Kenny just agreed.

When Ashley disappeared, Phoebe rested her head on Kenny's shoulder as the June breeze blew her hair about. She inhaled his scent and closed her eyes. Even though he'd been running around he didn't stink of sweat. She sat up when she felt him move his arm to wrap around her shoulders.

"Please don't," she said.

"I'm sorry," he replied.

"Don't worry, you didn't know. But, for future consideration, I can't stand touch anymore. I'm sorry." Tears formed in her eyes.

"Hey, it's not your fault." He tried to comfort. However, it didn't work as tears fell down her cheeks. Sighing he held up his hand. "Phoebe, I'm going to reach up to dry your tears."

She looked up at him but said nothing, flinching a little as his hand made contact with her cheek but didn't pull away. Breathing deeply, she felt his thumb stroke her face, wiping the tears away. The feeling was familiar but strange. The last time there was touch on her face it was a harsh beating. This new feeling was comforting.

"Thank you, Kenny." She said.

"For what?" he asked confused.

"For being a friend. For making Ashley smile earlier, no one's managed that for a while. For just being there."

"Phoebe, I have feelings for you. I want to be there for you. I want to be the one you talk to without fear of being judged. And so you don't have to worry about your dads reaction," he gave her a sly grin. She grinned back. "You can't fool me, Phoebe Grey. You don't like upsetting your dad. I know that much."

"Oh shut up," she grinned sticking her tongue out. She didn't notice Christian join them.

"Dinner's nearly ready, you two. Kenny, I've spoken to your father and he's agreed that you can join us." He said sitting down next to his daughter. "And don't even try to decline this invitation. My wife has cooked enough for you and you will insult her by trying to leave," he said with a light tone, smiling.

Kenny, who was going to insist he should go home, just smiled and nodded. Phoebe looked at her father and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered. He grinned at her and helped her up.

"So, did you kids have fun out here?"

"Yeah. We just sat and talked for a while." Phoebe said.

"Yeah? What were you talking about?"

"Stuff," she shrugged and he took the hint to stop asking questions.

Dinner was peaceful, that night. The family learnt a lot about Kenny and it was a relief for Christian and Ana to see Phoebe relaxing and having a good time with her friend.

"So, Kenny, what was your school like in England?" Ana asked casually.

"Very different to here. It was much smaller and not many teachers. Though the school I went to finished much earlier but then my college finished much later."

"Do you prefer it here or in England? Where abouts in England did you live?" Christian asked.

"I lived in a small town called Farnborough. And, I don't really have a preference though here it's nice to live quietly with my dad. We had a bit of a difficult life back home but its home."

"Why was your life difficult?"

"Dad," Phoebe said glaring at him and shaking her head slightly. "You don't have to answer that Kenny. He's just being nosey."

"I like being nosey. But she's right, Kenny. Don't answer that question; it's none of my business."

"So what do you want to do once you've left school?" Ana asked to stop the awkward silence building up.

"I want to teach in a school that specialises in helping disabled children and children with learning difficulties. I just like the idea of helping people and those children are the most vulnerable who need help." Phoebe looked at him in awe.

"That's amazing," she whispered.

"Yes, it is. There are not many people in this world who would be interested in that type of career," Christian commented, watching his daughter admire the boy.

"Kenny, will you play tennis with me after dinner?" Ashley asked.

"Ashley, you know you're not allowed to play sport after dinner as you'll make yourself sick." Christian said.

"I meant when we are allowed. Obviously not straight after dinner."

"I would love to, but I can't stay long after dinner. I've got to work this evening, sorry mate."

"Maybe another time?" Ana suggested taking Ashley's hand in hers when she saw him getting upset. He looked up and smiled. Kenny smiled back and finished eating the delicious meal Mrs Taylor had cooked them.

... ... ...

Once Kenny had left, Christian noticed that Phoebe hadn't stopped smiling.

"You seem happy," he commented.

"I guess, I am. Thanks for inviting him for dinner." He smiled and kissed her forehead, the only contact. "So, what do you think of him?"

"He's a very nice boy. And he makes you happy. I don't think I've seen you smile this much since before your show," he added sadly. She frowned and nudged his shoulder.

"Stop that. None of this is your fault."

"But if I hadn't missed your show, you would have smiled more." She sighed.

"Dad! Get over it. Big deal you missed it, there'll be other shows. I'm just glad you didn't give up on me and I'm glad to be home."

"You know, I still haven't heard you sing for a long time." He smiled.

"And you're not gonna anytime soon. I think I've had enough attention as of late so you go and spend some time with your sons and I'll go and find my mother," he just laughed and kissed her forehead again. "Love you, dad. Thanks for being here for me."

He didn't say anything else as he watched her hop towards the kitchen to find her mother.

... ... ...

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Also, can someone tell me when the summer holidays are in America? They're slightly different to England as I know they're longer in that they start in May or June? And I don't know when they finish so if anyone knows, I'd be grateful. Also for Christmas. I know I could Google t but I find so many different answers I don't know which one to belive.