Chapter 17: Catch Me When I Fall

"We keep to our business, you keep to yours," Kolic Kat stated as he shoved a spoonful of freeze-dried eggs into his mouth. "We are on friendly terms with each other, but that does not mean we're all going to be moving in together. We will equally share aid, food, supplies, information… but personal boundaries shall not be crossed."

"Fair enough," Derek replied, perched on the windowsill with the dawn light streaming on his face. "My team will be out of your hair within the hour, and everything will settle back down."

"What about 'em biters they got down there?" Ax spoke up around a mouthful of dry toast. "Just gonna let 'em sit there like blasted canaries in bird cages?"

As Kolic stiffened, Derek shot Ax a glare. "Yes, that's exactly what we do," he replied dryly. "Because how these people study the virus here has nothing to do with us. In fact, maybe we should get together our own mutts." He took a sip of dehydrated blue milk. "Look, we all saw what scientists have discovered so far on this disease, back on Naboo. MAV kills almost all of the brain, all the memories, all the personalities, all of everything except pure animal instinct. No pain sensors to stop them, and apparently, absolutely none of those midichlorian things that the Jedi can usually sense people with. They are nothing but animals, and animals are used for studying all the time."

"But what about animal intelligence?" Inya questioned, frowning. "I mean, sure, we used to use banthas all the time to study things; but never any of the more animal-like species such as the Wookies."

Han Solo, from the corner, pointed his plastic fork at her. "Oy! No bashing the Wookies."

"These things are not a species, Inya," Obi-Wan replied gently, ignoring Han. "They are mutants. Ravaged by the virus."

"Yeah, Inya, what the hell do you want us to do?" Ax scoffed. "Give 'em their own planet and say 'stay here, we'll send Republic officials to tax you every kriffing year?'"

"Just what are you trying to say, Colonist Ax?" Madeline inquired from the far section of the room, rifle swinging lazily on one shoulder.

"I don't see why he's trying to say anything on this subject," snapped Kolic hotly. "It's none of your Colony's business how we study the biters. I don't see why we're still talking about it."

Jason cleared his throat. "I think some of us have a say as to what mutts you use for the experiments," he said quietly. He shot a glance at Anakin, who was doing his best to block out the entire conversation as he picked at his breakfast.

"Oh, so that's what this is all about?" Madeline tensed, eyes narrowing. "You do realize that you yourself just said those things aren't what they used to be. Now, I'm sorry that your friend died, I'm sorry she's one of those things now, but there ain't nothing that we can do about that now. So please, let's not complicated this more than necessary." She turned back to her food, while Ax rolled his eyes. "As cold-hearted as a Sepie droid."

"Excuse me? What did you just say to me?"

"I'm just saying…"

"Don't you dare talk to me like that." A cold tone, warning, like ice. Deadly.

"I was just…!"

"ENOUGH!" Derek roared, slamming his empty now-empty plate down. "This will not be debated! It will not be discussed!" Irritated, the soldier turned to Kolic. "We won't be getting into your business. We won't be messing with at all if you don't want us to – but I will ask you to keep your people in line!" He shot a look at Madeline. "Show some damn respect, will ya? And all of you, including my own team, will you keep your kriffing wits about ya? Cut it out with the bickering and the arguing and the political nonsense you've all suddenly gained, and just calm down!"

The last two words hung in the air as silence fell upon the entire large group, a hot mixture of misery and shame and irritation and quiet, quiet terror. Derek gulped down the rest of his milk, just because he didn't want to simply sit there, and then looked around the room quickly; immediately he noticed two of the seats that had once been occupied were now empty. He pursed his lips, but didn't move or say anything.

Outside, in the hall, Anakin trailed after Obi-Wan silently as the older man guided him into a quiet corner, with no prying eyes and where enough daylight shone to frighten off any intimidating shadows. As soon as he was satisfied, the Master turned so that he was facing Anakin completely as they both sat down on two crates. The younger man immediately began scanning their surroundings, anxiety already begin to flash through his eyes; with two fingers, Obi-Wan gently reached over and turned Anakin's jaw until the two were locking gazes. "Look at me, Anakin," he said firmly. "Don't look around. Don't go searching out her. Just look at me. Look at me, and don't turn away."

The young man didn't protest; he held his mentor's soft, warm gaze, and had no desire to turn away. Even when he felt a dreadfully cold sensation tingle the back of his mind, he didn't look away. No matter how strong the urge to was. Because he knew, oh, he just knew, that as soon as his eyes left Obi-Wan's, that she would be standing there. Laughing. Mocking him. Smiling at him with fangs and bloody lips. She would be there to haunt him again, and so Anakin forced himself to just stared relentlessly into Obi-Wan's eyes, not even daring to blink. Obi-Wan chased the darkness and the demons away. Obi-Wan, as long as Anakin was completely focused on him, was a safe haven. And so Anakin stared, and Obi-Wan stared right back.

"I need to talk to you about something," the Master said quietly, not breaking the stare. "I know you don't want to discuss it, I know you don't want to think about it, but it has to be done. I'm talking to you about it because I believe you have a right to speak of it. Do you understand, Anakin?"

Yes. Obi-Wan was being cryptic, but Anakin wasn't stupid. Perhaps certifiably insane, and quickly losing whatever was left of his mind, but he wasn't stupid. He nodded his head.

"Anakin, I need to talk to you about Ahsoka…"

No. No, no, no, no, no. Automatically, his mental shields slammed down, making Obi-Wan wince slightly as his friend flinched. No. He didn't want to talk about the girl he'd loved as a sister, the girl he could barely remember now. No. He just wanted to pretend that this wasn't happening, that all of this wasn't happening, that this reality was all just some big joke. No. He didn't want to talk about her.

But Obi-Wan wasn't going to give up. "The Forsaken are currently using her to study," he continued, gripping Anakin's flesh wrist to steady him. "She's not dangerous at the moment; but Anakin, that's not really her. It's her body, but not Ahsoka. And we need to decide before we leave what we're going to do about this entire situation." A pause. "If you ask me to, Anakin, I will give the Forsaken permission to keep using her as a test subject. But it has to be for the right reasons. You have to say yes because you think she'll be helpful in finding a cure; not because you think it's still Ahsoka. Not because you want to believe that that thing can still be the girl you want it to be. Do you understand?"

No, not really. He was confused now, and his mind was fogging up, and his vision blurred for a second. Subconsciously, het let his eyelids slide closed, just for the briefest moment; and that was a mistake. Oh Force, it was a mistake. Because as soon as he did so, Death was there, grinning as she always was, her head floating around in the darkness. "Poor little Chosen One," she cooed, blinking away drops of black liquid from her eyes. "Poor, poor, little boy. Scared? Scared of the dark, little boy? Scared? You should be!"

She numbed all his other senses, so that Anakin didn't feel Obi-Wan grabbing his arms and shaking him until the older man knocked him against the wall, forcing his eyes opening and making Death disappear completely. "Anakin, look at me!" Obi-Wan called to him fiercely, face right in front of Anakin's as he held him tight. Now that he could see once more, he felt how painfully fast his heart was pounding, how quick and shallow his breaths had become. "Look at me," Obi-Wan continued to command. "Don't look away, don't close your eyes. Just look at me. I'm right here, Anakin. Look at me. Don't look away. Just look at me."

He looked at him, this time not pulling away. Obi-Wan… Obi-Wan rooted him down to the ground, down to where Death could not touch him. Obi-Wan had always caught him whenever he started to fall, physically such as whenever he jumped out of a speeder to chase a target, and mentally such as times like these. When he needed an anchor. Obi-Wan… Obi-Wan was safe, the noun 'safe', and Anakin finally just slipped completely into his Master's force presence, knowing he couldn't stay submerged in it for long lest he drain the man's energy, but just long enough so that the darkness left and he was surrounded by pure, familiar, beloved light. Obi-Wan immediately shrouded his former apprentice in his Force-signature, keeping him there, shielded, for ten minutes before Anakin finally came back to the present, blinking quickly.

They were still staring at each other, but Anakin no longer had the chills running up his spine, and he had calmed down to the point where Obi-Wan felt safe releasing his arms. "She can't hurt you if you don't let her," he whispered, and Anakin nodded numbly as they both shakily got to their feet.

As soon as they were both steady on their feet, Anakin lowered his head. "Let them study her," he said quietly, and Obi-Wan looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Are you sure?" the mentor questioned, and Anakin nodded numbly. "Yes."

"Why?"

A brief pause. "Cause I think she'd want to. She'd want to help out. I think. I know."

Obi-Wan smiled tightly at him before leading him back to the main room. "Okay. If you're sure," he whispered.

"I'm sure."

The rest of the Colony members were already packed when they returned. Obi-Wan felt Derek staring, and gave him a tiny nod of reassurance before helping Anakin get their bags and packs together. The Forsaken members watched them all closely with hawk eyes, and though feeling a bit uncomfortable under the scrutiny, Obi-Wan couldn't blame them. He was still suspicious as well of them, and when he gazed at Anakin and Jason, he knew he wasn't the only one. He also saw Anakin resist the urge to go down and look at Ahsoka again; quietly, he advised the younger man not to, it would only make things worse, and Anakin obliged.

But they couldn't afford this right now, couldn't afford making enemies out of the living when they were fight the mutts; so before leaving, Obi-Wan shook Kolic's hand firmly before he and the rest of the Colony marched out the door. "Be careful," the Twi'lek called after them, a gleam in his eye. "And we wish to you, the best of luck. We'll be seeing each other soon. I know this."

In silence, the Colony left the Forsaken behind them.

xXx

How in the hell Standards managed to remain sealed tight was beyond anyone's guess. But it was. When they entered, guns drawn, tense and expecting the words, surprise came from each one of them as they realized there wasn't a single mutt in the building. There was still death in the air, though, a heavy, constant presence.

"We all need to start thinking straight again," Derek stated once everyone was back inside Central, once again seated on their lumps, still smelling strongly of decay and smoke. "We're unbalanced right now, and that's dangerous. We came here to find a cure, and damn it, we're gonna find a blasted cure. We need to start prioritizing, start strategizing, and start working on this thing already. We've been here a week just making home renovations. We need to get our asses in gear."

"I've got most of the lab gear given to us," Lynn said. "I'll start setting stuff up downstairs in one of the lower levels. I took a look around the Forsaken system; it looked reasonable. If it's decided that its safe, maybe some of them could come here and give me a hand. We need all the help we can get."

"We'll talk about them too," Derek replied. "Do we trust 'em, how much do we trust 'em, how far are we willing to let them go into our mission and our lives… we need to discuss each one of these aspects, thoroughly and seriously. And…" He shot Ax a dark look. "…if anyone brings up a subject so stupid as politics again, there'll be consequences. I brought with me here soldiers; if I'd wanted politicians, I would've gotten them. We need to establish some sort of disciplinary system, and we gotta start it now. Organizing – that's our first step into all this."

"Everyone listen up," Nathan said with a half-smile. "Den mommy's ready to rock n roll!"

"Damn straight."

To sit down and talk, without guns and without mutts screeching in their ears, suddenly felt unusual to everyone. Strange and unfamiliar. Though Derek's words were true, most everyone remained sullen and silent, their thoughts too scattered to be brought together into solid points or arguments. No one protested as Derek took charge, nor when it became obvious that Obi-Wan was second-in-command, or when it was decided that teaming up with the Forsaken was the best way to go about things. They needed the help, they needed the supplies; they'd already given them shelter and food, and Obi-Wan had done a mind search on Hadrian. "This is a gift to us, people," Derek said firmly. "Let's not blow it and become hostile."

"What about their studying methods, though?" Lynn asked. "Are we gonna let them keep doing that?"

Ugh. "Already told you all before, we're not gonna just march into their headquarters and start giving them rules. They can do whatever they want, long as its within reason."

"They admitted to murdering an entire group of people."

"They admitted to putting down a bunch of cannibalistic animals, that's what they did," Derek corrected harshly. "I'm not gonna file charges against them. Are you?"

"This could be a chance," Inya spoke up, smoothing back a tangle of her thick black hair. "This is an opportunity for us, to gain allies, to get help in our mission."

"We hardly know them," Josh piped up quietly, twisting his lips in thought.

"Which is why," Obi-Wan replied. "I've decided that we'll take one or two of them along with a small group to go check out some of the nearer stores. We need more food than just what they offered us; not only will we see them in action against the mutts, but we can get a better layout of the nearby area as well."

Derek nodded slowly, smoothing down his dark, quickly growing whiskers. "Good. You got a team selected yet?"

Obi-Wan didn't need to look at the owner of the sharp glare being sent his way to know who it belonged to. "Anakin," he said immediately, feeling his friend relax through the Force. "Nathan. And… Ax." He chose the last name carefully, only choosing the rather brash military pilot because he had to be sure he could work in symmetry with the Forsaken. "The rest can stay here and begin setting stuff up. Alright with you, Derek?"

"Sure, ain't got no problem with that."

"Good. Then let us officially begin this mission."

xXx

"Keep in formation!" Obi-Wan hollered above the noise of hatchets, lightsabers, and knives impaling mutts. This time, no one dared use a blaster lest the noise attract any unwanted attention; while less reassuring than a gun, it felt good for the Jedi to feel his lightsaber heavy in his hands, to swing the blue blade and know for sure that it would hit its target. The sensation felt even stronger as he took a glance to his right, and spotted Anakin hack two mutts down at once, the young man's eyes afire as he went through the familiar motions of battle with his mentor, back to back, side by side. Yes. This was familiar, this he could handle. Confident, Obi-Wan used the Force to push several crates atop more of the attacking creatures, and repeated once more, "Stay in formation!"

Nathan and Ax slipped closer to each other at the reminder, while Han Solo and the woman who'd let them into the Forsaken headquarters, the one with the various tattoos, slipped back so that they were next to the Jedi. "Actually expected more to be honest," the woman, Natasha, stated as she kicked back a mutt and stabbed it in the head. "This is easy compared to the herds we run into while on supply runs; you guys must be good luck or something."

"It's all part of my charm, dearie," Nathan smirked as he decapitated one of the monsters.

It wasn't long before the small street they had entered was cleared, and then two large stores, with broken windows and smashed merchandise, were available to them. "Good work," Obi-Wan praised as he swept a copper lock of hair off his damp forehead. The thunderstorm from last night had long since vanished, replaced once my by the brutal, scorching sun. He shared a look with Anakin, pleased to see that the boy's eyes were clear from adrenaline and no longer holding that terrified gleam that they'd adopted lately. Good. "We should start scavenging now," he went on. "Natasha, you can come with me and Ax. Anakin, you go with Han and Josh and check out the second store. You've all got forty five minutes, then we'll meet up back here. If the streets get flooded, stay indoors. If you have to run, head back to Standards and we'll catch up to each other there. Understand?"

Anakin nodded, reluctant to leave but knowing splitting up to clear the two stores was the sensible thing to do. Besides, the cold sensation in the back of his mind had melted away earlier, and had yet to return; using his lightsaber once more seemed to secure his temporary sense of poise, and quickly he signaled for Josh and Han to follow him.

It was a trashed dump with barely any preserved food left in the aisles and all the supplies strewn across the floor, half soiled and broken. "Food's our main objective," Anakin told the others as they switched on flashlights – the yellow sunlight failed to reach any farther into the building than the direct front of it. "See anything else worth taking, grab it – we can all divide the stuff up between our groups once we're back in a safe zone."

"Sounds good, kid. I already got my eyes set on some pretty toys over there." Solo pointed to where several gears and other mechanic parts were piled into one corner of the store. The man made a beeline for it, while Josh rolled his eyes and said, "I'll go start looking for the food."

Anakin trailed after Han, scooping up a few dented cans and sealed bags of grains as he walked towards where the older man was shifting through various piles of scrap and random objects. He noticed several speeder parts being dropped into the Wookie-lover's basket, and the corner of his lip twitched upward into an almost-smile as he knelt beside him.

Han shot him a look and smirked, winking. "I love me my ship parts," he remarked. "Not even the dang apocalypse can take that away from me."

"We've already scoured all these nearby areas for anything that will help repair a ship," Anakin said miserably. "It's like everyone cleared anything useful out and burned it before the evac." A pause. "And I think even if we did manage, somehow, to build a ship, most of us wouldn't leave. We swore we wouldn't go back to Naboo till we had a cure – safest way to keep anyone else alive from turning."

"Hm." Solo shoved a bunch of screws into his pockets. "Mostly for tinkering what I get. Already tried the whole build-a-ship thing months ago. Every ship with a hyperdrive was taken during the evac, so… yeah. Y' know, I'm not even Coruscanti. I'm from kriffing, Correlia."

Anakin was only half listening, eyes watching the shadow of a passing mutt go past the window; once it was out of sight, having wandered off, he turned to Han and gave him a shaky half-smile. "Good to know you've got an interest in engineering," he said. "Could come in handy."

"You into 'em yourself?"

"Kinda… yeah, yeah I am."

"Sweet. If I ever…"

"RUN!" Josh's voice cut out any conversation, shattering any stretch of calm and filling in the cracks with that raw panic Anakin hated so much; the raw panic that suddenly flooded his mind, as it usually did now. The feeling amplified when Josh came tearing down the main isles, pursued by hungry screeches and all too familiar growls. "RUN! DID YOU NOT HEAR ME?! RUN! RUN!"

Immediately, Han and Anakin were on their feet, weapons drawn, as about twenty mutts came charging down various aisles, snarling and snapping their jaws. "Oh, shit." They took off after Josh's fleeing frame, the store too much of an enclosed space to fight well in, the streets better though not by much because of all the bodies and trash that littered the ground. As soon as he leapt through the broken window, Anakin ignited his saber and spun around to gut three mutts that leapt after him. They slid to the ground unceremoniously, just as Obi-Wan, Natasha, and Nathan came running at them, weapons drawn. "Anakin!"

"Master!"

"I can see more coming round the bend, whole lot of them!" Nathan called out. "They're gonna swarm this place soon, we gotta get back before they cut off our route back to the hospital!"

They ran; because as soon as the small ocean of mutts came round the corner, showing themselves to the small group of survivors, panic climbed up a scale. "MOVE, NOW!" Obi-Wan hollered, and everyone forced their way forward as fast as their legs could carry them without tripping. They should at least be somehow used to this by now, shouldn't they? At least a bit? But no, terror still came with the desperate chase as strong as ever. "FASTER!" Nathan shouted. "WE WON'T MAKE IT!"

They were closing in quickly, not a tightly packed herd which would've been more dangerous, but several mutts spread out so that there was no way around them. The gap between them and Standards was quickly closing up, and with shallow breaths , the group threw themselves onto the speeder used a step stool to get to the door they'd been using to get in and out of Standards. Obi-Wan used the Force to throw open the door, and everyone tumbled in at once, Anakin locked it as soon as they were all inside.

They laid in semi darkness for several minutes, panting and wheezing on top of each other, before Han Solo let out a loud laugh. "Well…! Wasn't that fun?"

xXx

Night fell. Han Solo and Natasha returned to the Forsaken with a little cart full of supplies, the sight of it seeming almost like some sort of pact between the two groups. Lynn and Inya showed off the little bit they'd worked on the lab, and Derek took the first watch, in order to keep an eye on all the mutts that had filled the alleyways after the earlier excitement. A strange buzzing sensation filled the atmosphere; but then again, it wasn't as if calm and serenity was expected to rule the air now, was it?

Anakin took watch at midnight, the Knight struggling to stay focused on his task, his mind subconsciously begging for Death not to make an appearance tonight. He spent most of the time just staring at Obi-Wan, trying to remember the pre-apocalypse galaxy where the worlds' greatest fears were an old man in a fancy brown cloak and his little army of tin soldiers. Tried to ignore the groans outside, and the shadows all around, and the fact that fear was still clawing painfully at his chest every time he took a breath. Don't think about it. Don't acknowledge it, don't give into it, and maybe it will go away.

When the little thump outside Central's door came, he should've believed it was just the building setting, or his own imagination. He shouldn't have jumped to his feet, heart pounding, eyes racing at such a trivial noise. He shouldn't have snuck outside the room to investigate something his overactive imagination had crafted, and he should've, for Force's sake, brought his kriffing gun. Maybe it was exhaustion, or fear, or doubt, or a little bit of each; but Anakin went ahead and did all of the above-mentioned things, and as soon as he stepped outside of Central, he regretted it.

As soon as his eyes adjusted to the pitch black darkness in the hall, he took a step back and felt his jaw grow slack as he saw the figure ahead of him start to approach. "Wait…" he breathed. "How did you get in here, what do you wa…?"

He didn't finish the question. Strong hands wrapped around his neck and mouth, appearing out of the shadows; before he even had a chance to fight them off, Anakin felt something cold and sharp sink into his neck, in the soft flesh just below his jaw. His vision blurred – well, more than it already was – his mind went blank, and into the arms of his captors, he fell unconscious.