Chapter Three:
"Hi, 'scuse me?" Mabel asked as she leaned over the reception desk at the hospital. "We're here lookin' for a John Doe."
"Y'know how many John Does turn up in a big city like this?" the nurse scoffed.
"How about one that was riding in a washing machine with a scuba tank on?" Mabel asked.
"Gotcha, Room 13. And believe it or not, that ain't the craziest story I've ever heard working here."
"Thanks, and I believe it!" Mabel cheered as she skipped back to where Dipper, Stan, and Ford were waiting. "On to room 13!" she cheered.
"Not sure if I'm looking' forward to this," Stan grumbled.
"Really? Aren't you a paranormal investigator?" Mabel asked.
"Yeah, that' don't mean I like all paranormal activity."
"Really? What kinds do you not like?"
"Aliens," Stan shuddered. "Monsters I can handle. Ghosts I can handle. Even cutesy little fairies that trick into think they're oh, so precious until they bite your face off I can handle. But aliens? No me gustave!"
"It's gusta," Dipper sighed.
"Whatever," Stan shrugged.
"And besides, he looked pretty normal to me," Dipper added.
"Yeah, except Mabel here said he had a weirdmagedon zodiac wheel tattoo on the back of his hand," Stan pointed out.
"Now, now, let's not jump to conclusions," Ford said. "There may be nothing sinister behind that mark."
"Let me say that again, ahem," Stan cleared his throat, "a WEIRDMAGEDON zodiac wheel. WEIRD. MA. GE. DON. WEIRDMAGEDON! If that ain't sinister than I don't know what is!"
"Stanley, shush," Ford hissed. "I'm not saying we don't have reason for concern, but let's not be hasty here, alright? At least not until we've heard this boy's story."
"Fine," Stan crossed his arms.
"Besides, Bill's dead," Dipper added. "How can there be a weirdmagedon without Bill?"
"Fair point, but I still don't like it," Stan shrugged as they finally made their way to room 13 and stepped inside. A doctor was there looking over some papers on a clipboard.
"Ah, are you this young man's family."
"Actually, we're just-" Ford began, but Stan cut him off.
"Why, yes! We're his third cousin's brother's wife's step-nieces great uncle and nephew and niece. Twice removed!"
The doctor arched an eyebrow. "Uh-huh."
Ford face palmed from behind his brother, as did Dipper, but Mabel just snickered from behind her hand.
"Well, I must say this fellow is in quite rough shape. He has four broken ribs, a fractured humerus, third degree burns on 20% of his body, a laceration across his torso from his chest to his abdomen, and torn ligaments in both legs."
"Ugh!" Mabel cringed as she looked at the poor fellow now sleeping in his hospital bed.
"Still, I expect him to make a full recovery. It's just going to take him a while and probably quite a bit of physical therapy."
Mabel slowly tiptoed to the bedside. The man definitely looked a lot better than he had in the park, he was dirty nor soaking wet any more. His right hand was Both hands resting on his chest, showing off his zodiac tattoo. Mabel now noticed on his left hand was another tattoo in the shape of a star. Not a fancy star, just a star, without so much as having the lines in the middle. Peeking out from the v-neck of his hospital gown was the corner of what looked to be another tattoo on his chest, but Mabel couldn't tell what it was.
Hm, Mabel thought to herself. Interesting tat choices. I respect that.
"Well, you're right, he seems pretty normal," Stan nodded. "Outside of the whole coming out of the washer thing."
"Doesn't that star on his left hand look kinda like Gideon's symbol?" Dipper asked.
"Yeah, a little bit," Mabel nodded.
"Hmm," Dipper reach over and pulled the man's collar down a bit. "And isn't that your symbol, Mabel?"
"Uh-huh," Mabel nodded as she gaped at the shooting star on the man's chest, just above his heart. "This is really weird."
"Hm," Ford began to scribble on the notebook he always had in his pocket.
Dipper stood back and scratched at the back of his head as he thought.
"So, clearly this guy came from an alternate dimension, right?"
"Correct," Ford nodded.
"So…" Dipper didn't finish his thought, instead he just rubbed his chin and thought some more until his phone began to go off. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked at it.
"Go on back to the hotel, Dipper," Ford said without looking up from his notes. "Take care of your family. We'll update you on anything that happens."
"Will do, thanks," Dipper said as he took the call and headed out of the room.
"Hey, Princess." he said as he slipped down the hallway.
Mabel watched him go.
The man in the bed suddenly gasped and opened his eyes.
"Where am I?" he asked as he tried to sit up, but immediately winced and fell back down against the bed. "Oh...ow…"
"Don't move!" Mabel said as she leaned over him. "You're in pretty rough shape."
"Yup. Noticed," the man wheezed as he looked about. "But where am I?"
"You're in a hospital," Mabel said. "My brother and I found you and your magical washing machine in the par-"
"Right!" his eyebrows raised in excitement as he rolled his head back in relief. "I made it!"
"Erm...I guess?" Mabel asked.
"This is earth 9 and 6/8's right?" the man asked.
"I have no idea-"
"Yes," Ford answered.
The man turned in surprise. "Oh, um I didn't notice you two-"
"Allow me to introduce myself," Ford said as he put his notebook away and walked forward, hand extended. "Stanford Filbrick Pines. This is my brother Stanley, and our great niece Mabel."
"Nice to meet you all," the man said though he had a strange scowl on his face. "I'm Romulus Oakland."
"Romulus?" Mabel murmured to herself. Sounds like the hero from a harlequin novel…
"Can you answer a few questions for us?" Ford asked.
"I can certainly try," Romulus answered.
"How did you get this mark on your hand?" Ford, who was still shaking Romulus's right hand, turned it so that the zodiac was facing upward.
"It was one of my three," Romulus said.
"Huh?" Stan asked.
"One of my three," Romulus said again in a matter of fact voice.
The three Pines just frowned in confusion. Romulus' eyebrows knitted.
"One of my three birthmarks…?"
"That's a birthmark!?" Mabel exclaimed. "Not even Dipper's is that fancy!"
"I...I don't understand…" Romulus shook his head. "Are you not all born with three marks to help guide you in life?"
"Uh...that would be a no," Mabel said. "Though that would be awesome!"
Would make my love life SO much easier!
"Oh," Romulus' cheeks flushed a deep pink.
"Aw, you're kinda cute," Mabel said as she pinched his cheek.
"Mabel, stop it. The boy has been through enough as is," Ford chastised her.
She let Romulus's face go. He rubbed at it but didn't look upset of offended. In fact Mabel thought she saw just the hint of a smile.
"Well," Ford stroked his chin. "Seeing as you have a zodiac sign as one of your 3, as you said, I suppose that mea-"
"You know about the zodiac!?" Romulus's eyes lit up. "Can you tell me where I can find some of the members?"
"Right in front of you!" Mabel said. "I'm the shooting star, Grunkle Stan is the Crescent, and the hand is Grunkle Ford."
Romulus's eyes widened even more. "So you've done it then? You've actually done it!?"
"Done what?" Mabel asked.
"You've beaten a Cipher, haven't you!?"
A short silence followed as the three Pines exchanged glances.
"If by Cipher you mean Bill Cipher then, yes, we have," Ford answered.
"So you can do it again, right!?" Romulus asked.
"AGAIN!?" Mabel, Ford, and Stan shrieked.
"Bill is back!?" Mabel cried.
Romulus's eyebrows raised as he waved his hands. "No. no, no, no! You're Cipher is dead and done! That's the whole reason I came here. But he's not the only one out there. There's an entire species of Ciphers. Each created with conquering a dimension. Bill Cipher, the one assigned to this dimension, was destroyed by you and the other members of your Zodiac I assume. Our Cipher, however, is alive and well and running a muck of our world!"
"Wait," Mabel cut in. "What do you mean Bill wasn't the only one…"
"Just that," Romulus said. "There's another of his kind named Phil that has conquered my dimension."
Silence fell over the room.
"We tried to stop him," Romulus continued, holding up his left hand with the star etched on it. "But our Zodiac was broken. All of the members were slaughtered. I'm…" Romulus began blinking away the tears forming in his eyes. "...I'm the only one left…"
"Oh," Mabel set a hand on his shoulder. "I'm...I'm so sorry…"
Romulus hung his head for a while longer then cleared his throat and shook himself off.
"But that's why I came here," he said. "Your zodiac is still intact, is it not?"
"If by 'intact' you mean all the members are still alive, then yes," Ford answered.
"So you can help," Romulus said. "You can save us!"
Stan grabbed Ford by the shoulder and all but dragged him to the door. "Are you hearing this?" Stan asked. "This guys wants to drag us into another weirdmageddon! I told you he was no good!"
"Can you blame him, Stanley?" Ford asked. "His ent-"
"How do we know that? How do we know he ain't lying. He might be a double agent!"
"Stanl-"
"Well, he could be!"
As the two older men kept arguing and discussing Romulus grabbed onto Mabel's arm.
"Mabel, please!" he begged. "Please! You're the only hope left for my dimension. Help us, I'm begging you!"
"Sh," Mabel set her hand over Romulus'. "Don't worry, I'll talk to them."
"Are you sure?" Romulus asked.
"Pfft! Yeah, I'm sure! I know how to work the Grunkles, trust me. I'm practically an expert!"
"Thank you," Romulus sighed as he finally relaxed and seemingly feel back to sleep.
Mabel watched him as the Grunkles kept talking. A dimension where everyone was born with three tattoos the help guide them through life, huh? She kinda wished she'd been born in a dimension like that, though not really because it was run by a Cipher right now. What all did Romulus' mean? The two on his hands were pretty easy to figure out. He was a member of the Zodiac, and he was apparently the pentagram in his dimension's version. But what about the shooting star on his chest? What was that symbol supposed to mean?