Chapter 6: Sandwich Day
"Today is sandwich day."
Moses raised his eyebrows, dumbfounded by the random response he was given. What does sandwich day have anything to do with why Lilo was soaking wet and late for his hula class?
Seeing that she needed to further elaborate, Lilo took in a deep breath. "Every Thursday," she continued, "I give Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich for breakfast and supper."
Moses tilted his head, exasperated. "Pudge is a fish…?" He must have missed Lilo mentioning that fact somewhere along the way. But were fish even able to eat sandwiches?
"But for today, we were out of peanut butter after breakfast!" Lilo whined, "And I completely forgot about it until supper time. So I asked my sister what to give Pudge for supper and she said a tuna sandwich. I can't give Pudge tuna!" Her voice lowered to almost a whisper as she asked the next question, "Do you know what tuna is?"
Moses raised his eyebrows, unsure of what Lilo was driving at via her rambling, "Fish?"
"It's FISH! I can't feed Pudge fish! He's a fish! I'll be an abomination if I gave him tuna!" she shouted. "I was late because I had to run down to the store to get peanut butter so I can feed Pudge because all we had was stinking tuna!"
"Lilo! Lilo!" Moses raised his voice to maintain his authority over the shrieking girl. If this was Lilo's made up excuse for being late to his class, it was an extremely well-rehearsed one. "Why is this so important?" he asked.
"Pudge controls the weather."
Moses' jaw almost fell. He instinctively looked around to see the other girls' reactions. Teresa looked deep in thought, questioning the logic of the statement. Elena and Yuki simply shrugged at each other due to the sheer absurdity of what they'd just heard. And Mertle? She just stared at Lilo and muttered her thoughts under her breath.
"You're crazy…"
Unfortunately, of all the reactions, that was the one that Lilo could easily notice. Hearing that remark caused the girl to break into a run and tackle Mertle to the ground in anger. She raised her fist up to Mertle's face, ready to give the bespectacled girl what she deserved for all the torment Mertle had put her through.
"Ahhhhh!" Besides Mertle, the other three girls were also screaming in fear, running around the stage. As she was about to punch her fist down, she found herself locking eyes with Mertle. Looking straight into Mertle and finding the usual sass in her face replaced with terror caused Lilo to hesitate.
The hesitation was just long enough for Moses to take charge. Lilo felt her outstretched arm being grabbed harshly by Moses. As Moses pulled her off of Mertle, he raised his voice to keep order. "Girls, girls, girls! Everybody calm down!" The four girls, including the recovered Mertle, huddled behind Moses, trying to keep away from Lilo.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Lilo cried out, unaware that she had lost control of herself until Moses stepped in. "I won't do it again!" she said, backing away.
Moses sighed and spoke softly, "I'll have to cut short tonight's class, girls." He then turned to Lilo, "Maybe we should call your sister…"
Lilo gasped. "No, I'll be good! I wanna dance! I practiced for tonight's hula… I practiced…"
"Lilo…", Moses started, trying to phrase his sentence in a way the six year old would understand, "you know this is an important night. It was our first hula night class. And I hate to say this, but what you did soured the overall experience."
Lilo looked down in shame. "I know, but I…" she couldn't finish her sentence, knowing Moses was right. She literally couldn't find the words to say to her teacher with a straight face.
Seeing Lilo at a loss for words, Moses spoke up. "Lilo, what you did was unacceptable. First off, the peanut butter story, that's no excuse for tardiness."
"But I'm telling the truth!" Her face turned desperate, "I really did feed Pudge a peanut butter sandwich! You believe me, don't you?"
Moses grimaced at her question, "Yes, I believe you." He bit his tongue at the white lie, but to state the truth would only drive Lilo past the breaking point into despair. "Still, even if it's true, that was no excuse to hit Mertle."
"I know…" she said, avoiding eye contact. Lilo knew that if she looked directly at Moses, she would be able to see Mertle, who would definitely be gloating at seeing her arch-rival get reprimanded.
That gave the girl an idea. Lilo might currently be drowning in punishment, but she won't go under without taking someone down with her. "But Mertle called me crazy…" she mumbled, hoping to at least pin some of the blame on Mertle.
"Mertle," Moses turned around to look at Mertle.
"What?" Mertle looked incredulous at the accusation. "Weird-lo really is crazy! She nearly punched me!"
"Mertle, I would not tolerate fighting in my class. It is not right. The five of you are my students, and I'll rather you all get along with each other." Seeing Mertle's horrified face, Moses quickly changed the subject before the girl could object. "And as for you, Lilo, you cannot be selfish. Trying to inflict physical harm on Mertle, even if you don't like her, is unacceptable. Did you even consider how she feels?"
"No..." she mumbled. She really didn't want to hear about this now.
"Anyway, your actions tonight hurt all of us. Not just Mertle."
"What? But I didn't touch Elena, Teresa and Yuki!"
"I didn't mean hurt as in physical hurt. 'Hurt' can hurt in other ways." He spoke in a childish tell-tale manner, hoping she'd get the message. "Lilo, you were late today. Class was almost over when you came. Do you know what this means for all of us?"
Unaware of what Moses was getting at, Lilo shook her head.
"It means you did not learn what I taught everyone today. By coming late, you will be behind on practice and I will have to repeat what I taught everyone else the next lesson. And as a small group, I cannot leave anyone behind until all of you master the basics. Your tardiness will end up holding back the rest of us."
Lilo looked down, guilty. She had never thought of it that way. All she had wanted to do was make sure Pudge was fed so that he didn't cause a rainstorm…
"I want you to think about what you've done, Lilo." Standing up, he announced the dismissal of the hula class. "Come back in a few days for the next class. Have a safe trip home, kids!"
Lilo watched as Mertle and her friends ran into the changing room, eager to head back home for a good night's sleep. She followed suit, dragging her feet behind them.
As she changed out of her hula attire, she couldn't help but think about Moses' words. In particular, one sentence he had said. "I cannot leave anyone behind until all of you master the basics."
What Moses had said earlier reminded her so much of what her father used to say to her.
"Ohana means family, and family means that nobody gets left behind or forgotten," she said out loud to herself. Her face turned firm as she knew what she had to do. Hastily putting on her favourite red mu'umu'u, she rushed back out to the stage area of the school.
"Mertle!" Lilo looked around for the girl in question. "Mertle?" Unfortunately for her, there was no one around but Moses. They'd all changed faster than her and had disappeared.
"Where did Mertle go?" she asked Moses.
"Oh, she left about a minute ago."
"Thanks," she said before walking briskly out of the hula school, hoping to catch up with her. Luckily for her, she managed to spot Mertle and her friends within a few seconds. They were walking at a slow pace and she could easily reach them if she ran. Silently increasing her pace, she slowly caught up to them. When she was within five feet from them, she announced her presence. "Mertle?"
"Ahhhh!" Mertle shrieked, before recognising Lilo's voice and calming down. She signalled her friends and the four of them turned around to face Lilo. "Oh, it's Weird-lo," Mertle said as she flipped her hair, "Why did you follow me? What do you want?"
"I'm…" Lilo started to hesitate, scratching her ear upon hearing Mertle's agitated tone. "I'm sorry," Lilo spat out her apology as quickly as possible, as though the words were poison.
"Excuse me?" Mertle said, mild surprise in her eyes. "Say that again?"
"What Moses said back in class was right. I'm sorry for almost punching you, Mertle," Lilo swallowed her pride and apologised in a sincere tone.
"Pehhh! No way you're really sorry," Mertle raised her eyebrows.
"I really am! I just want to make amends! So that—"
"So that we all can be friends?" she sneered, finishing Lilo's sentence. "Heh, you're just saying all of this nice stuff because you want to be my friend!"
"Mertle," Lilo cringed at Mertle's unkind words, and yet in a way, expected them. "Ohana means family," she tried again from a different angle.
"What?" Mertle and her friends were confused by what Lilo had just said.
"Ohana!" Lilo brightly declared. "It's the spirit of family. If I accept you friends as my family, we can get along together in the future!" she spoke with naivety.
"Listen up, Weird-lo," Mertle said, starting to back away. The thought of being together and accepting Lilo honestly scared her more than Lilo hitting her back at the hula school. "You are weird, and you will never be my friend," she said, with added emphasis on every additional word.
"Yeahhhhh," Teresa, Elena and Yuki chorused in agreement from their vantage point behind Mertle.
At their universal rejection, Lilo turned away from the four girls to hide her disappointment. In a way, she had anticipated Mertle and her posse declining her offer, but that didn't stop her feelings from being hurt when it actually happened. She hung her head low, starting to walk away when Mertle's shriek suddenly caught her attention.
"Look up! Look up at the sky!"
Heeding Mertle's observation, Lilo looked up into the night sky, and up there was...
"A falling star!" she exclaimed, pointing at it.
"You mean a meteorite," Teresa corrected. Seeing her friends stare at her as if they wanted to call her a nerd, she hurriedly added, "I saw that term on TV."
As they talked, the foreign space object continued to hurtle down before it disappeared over the canopy of the forest to their right. Two seconds later, a loud bang accompanied by a tiny tremor rocked the earth.
"Cool!" Lilo exclaimed. "A real falling star! I wanna touch it and make a wish!" However, before Lilo could run to the crash site, a strong arm clasped her wrists.
"Oh no you don't, Lilo," Nani held a firm grip on her sister, "You are not going into the jungle to investigate a dangerous meteorite alone, at night, and unsupervised."
"Nani!" Lilo's eyes widened as large as saucers when she realised that her sister had overheard her plans. "Uh, I was joking…" she tried to recover, "When I said 'go into the forest', I really meant 'buy some shaved ice'!"
Nani's lips curled upwards into a tiny smile, tightening her grip on Lilo's wrist. "Nice try, Lilo."
"But I really want to go!" she pouted, begging her sister to change her mind. "It's a real falling star! Stuff like that don't happen every day!"
"No means no, Lilo!" Nani stood her ground. "It's dangerous out there!"
"How did you even find me?" Lilo whined.
"Moses called me to pick you up," Nani replied. "And I spotted you because you and your classmates were less than twenty feet away from the hula school," she added. "Come, let's go."
"Noooo! I wanna go!" Lilo struggled against Nani's grip.
"LILO!"
Mertle and her friends just watched as Nani tried to drag away a squirming Lilo back home. She eventually resorted to cradle carrying her sister on her shoulder, with Lilo hollering as Nani walked back to their home, and in Lilo's point of view, further and further away from the falling star.
"Well…" Mertle began once the two were out of sight, "that was weird."
"Um, Mertle?" Teresa tugged at her friend's shoulder. "Should we explore the meteorite?"
"No way, Teresa!" she frowned. "Weird-lo wanted to look for it, and that means that exploring it is uncool!"
"Yeahhh!" Elena and Yuki backed up their leader's opinion.
"B-but…" Teresa stammered, "I thought you said Lilo was the weird one? Just because she got carried away by her sister doesn't mean that exploring the meteorite is weird!"
"Well, I think that anything Weird-lo wants to do is weird! After all, she got carried home on her sister's shoulders. I thought only babies rode on shoulders!" Mertle smirked. She had to remember this incident so that she could make fun of Weird-lo the next time they met. "Let's go, girls. How about we walk home on our feet, like normal people?"
Teresa held back, her gaze lingering on the site the meteorite had crashed. Grey smoke had started to rise out of the forest, giving her a path to follow right to the impact zone. She'd always liked science, and this was her chance to finally touch a real-life meteorite! "Mertle's not going to like this. Oh, and Mom's gonna kill me…" she thought, "but it's like Lilo said, this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance. If I miss this opportunity, I might be old and wrinkly before the next meteorite lands near Kokaua Town."
"Actually, I just realised that I left my purse back at the school," she lied. "You guys go yourselves!"
"Oh, really?" Mertle said. "Well, bye!"
"Take care, Teresa!"
"See you tomorrow!"
"Thanks!" Teresa replied as her three friends walked away, chattering about other topics. She walked in the opposite direction, back to the hula school, until she was certain they were gone. To play it safe, she waited an additional few minutes before making a U-turn back to where they were earlier, except this time she was completely alone.
At least this way Mertle was not going to yell at her for doing something her friend considered weird!
Taking a glance around to ensure no one was following her, Teresa took a deep breath before leaving the footpath and walking into the dark forest.
Meanwhile, light-years away from Kauai, a much different group of aliens were also trying to make friends with each other.
At least, as best as they possibly could.
"Blubby-face! I thought I would never see you again!"
Gantu's face turn the darkest it possibly could as he heard and then saw Experiment 625 and Agent Pleakley walk into his cabin. The two creatures in the galaxy he most definitely did not want to see right now. One had humiliated him multiple times in front of the Galactic Council and was dead-set determined to continue messing with him, while the other had robbed him of the opportunity to send out his Armada to Earth because of freaking mosquitoes. He had to physically refrain himself from attacking them, his left arm holding back his right so he wouldn't reflexively draw his plasma blaster from the holster and gave them both what they truly deserved.
Gantu sighed. The two of them didn't even deserve the ammo that would be needed to blast them with hot plasma. It wouldn't justify the cost. All Gantu was willing to give them for now was his annoyance. "Be quiet, you stupid experiment," he spat, "I'm only fetching you to that miserable planet Jumba's headed to. Then maybe with any luck I'll never see you again, and for good this time."
"Aw…" 625 cooed, "fetching me to Earth in your cozy little personal ship? So you're like, my personal chauffeur? I'm honoured, fish-face. If this is really the last time we meet, I'll make it worth your time!"
"Six-two-five," Gantu spoke with a very forced neutral face, although the rage in his eyes gave his real anger away, "I am at the limit of my patience. If you dare to push me any further, I will ditch you on an abandoned asteroid and then you'll have to hitchhike your way to that miserable planet."
Before 625 could retort, Pleakley decided to ask what was on his mind. "When can we leave? I wanna go!"
"We're going soon! Hold still!" Gantu said. That plasma shooter in his holster was getting more and more tempting by the second.
"Woo!" Pleakley shouted in excitement as he sat down next to Gantu on the navigator's seat. "I'm actually going to Earth itself! I get to go to Earth! I get to go to Earth! I get to go—"
"Am I with a bunch of toddlers? Because you're acting like one, Agent Pleakley! Remember your place!" he shouted, pulling rank over the junior agent.
625 snickered at Gantu as he saw him getting tormented by Pleakley as well. "Hey, cheer up! At least it wasn't me who annoyed you this time."
Gantu just glanced at 625 before continuing to try calming the ecstatic Pleakley down. "This is my ship! I'm the captain, I'm in charge here!"
The yellow experiment just looked at the chaos before stating his opinion. "Doesn't look like it, fishsticks. If you can't even control your own Federation alien," he pointed at Pleakley, who was flailing his arms in excitement, "then don't even talk about what I am going to do to your order and control."
That was it. He'd had enough. Forget the Grand Councilwoman's orders.
Gantu whipped out his plasma blaster, ignoring Pleakley's gasp, and aimed it straight at 625 with a flourish. The calm experiment flinched backwards and hurriedly changed the tone of his speech. "I-I mean... you still can have order around here. Yeah, order is good! I ain't going to cause ya any trouble, heh heh! None at all!"
He lowered the blaster, seeing 625 shivering in fear even though the experiment tried to put on a brave front. See, intimidation always worked! Even Pleakley had also stopped talking in the panic.
"Captain Gantu, sir?" Pleakley meekly asked.
"What?!" He didn't even try to sound patient this time.
"U-uh, nothing…" he started, "It's just that I was unaware that you didn't like the experiment as well."
"Of course I hate him! He's a—" Gantu suddenly stopped talking, his mood changing as he processed Pleakley's words. "Wait, did you just say 'as well'?" His eyes perked in curiosity.
"Yeah!" Pleakley responded. "He's a troublemaker! I'm here to supervise him and make sure he doesn't cause any trouble on the delicate planet that is Earth!"
"Finally!" Gantu pumped his fist in elation. "Yes! Someone else who understands my pain! In the Council Meeting everyone was on that abomination's side! You and I will get along well, Pleakley!" He shook Pleakley's hand vigorously, as the poor alien froze in shock and confusion.
"Hey, are you two gossiping about me behind my back?" 625 looked annoyed, sensing his two co-passengers on the ship making an alliance at his expense.
"It's not gossiping behind your back if you can hear it, trog!" Gantu smirked. Seeing 625 huff and sit down on the ground at a loss of words after his reply made his day so much sweeter. Payback was sweet!
"Captain!" an Armada officer rushed into the cockpit.
"What?!" Gantu turned towards the officer. "I'm having a moment."
"What moment?"
"Gloating at my sworn enemy!"
"Sorry to interrupt then, sir," the officer saluted. "But the Grand Councilwoman would like to brief experiment six-two-five and Agent Pleakley before takeoff." The officer bowed respectfully as he finished, allowing the Grand Councilwoman to walk into the cockpit.
"Captain Gantu, it's nice to see you haven't vaporised your own ship in anger." She ignored Gantu's shocked face at the thinly veiled insult and zeroed in onto 625. "Experiment six-two-five, I take it you know your main priority?"
"Yep!" he replied, getting up from the ground. "Get Jumba. Easy as that."
"Unfortunately, it is not as easy as that. If it was, I wouldn't resort to using your help."
625 fell back to the ground, clutching his heart in mock drama. "Oh, you wound me!"
The Grand Councilwoman rolled her eyes at his antics and carried on, "As Pleakley has informed me, Earth is mainly inhabited by creatures known as humans. They are extremely simple creatures and thus cannot know of our existence. Therefore, it is of utmost importance that no one finds out about this mission. You will have to remain unseen, and if necessary, get a disguise."
"How smart are these people?" 625 asked, curious about Earth's population. "I've never seen a human before."
"Neither have I! I'm so excited to see them firsthand!" Pleakley cut into the conversation, not noticing the Grand Councilwoman's look of disdain on her face. "Humans aren't the brightest, but they are an excellent source of biodiversity for mosquitoes—"
"Take this," the Grand Councilwoman interrupted, afraid of Pleakley going offtopic if she let him carry on. She reached into her black suit and took out a white card in her hand before continuing her sentence. "This is the debit card to your Galactic Federation bank account, six-two-five."
"Bank account?" 625 asked, genuinely surprised at the Council's generosity. He got up from the ground, reaching for the card. "Really? For me?"
"Yes, well... at least for this mission," she clarified. "It is a temporary account registered under your name. We'll deactivate it after your mission's completion."
"Kinda fancy, huh," 625 flipped the card around, examining it, "especially considering I'll only be on the mission for what, a few days?"
"It is excessive, yes, but the Council likes to account for everything. The union argued for bank accounts to be given to all Federation members, temporary or permanent, and I will see that through to the end as their leader." She folded her arms, "To make an exception for you would be flouting the official rules and I will not tolerate laziness on my staff's part."
"Gee, why don't you let loose a bit?" 625 commented, "Just relax! You don't need to be such a stern leader all the time!"
"Ahem," she coughed, changing the topic. "Anyway, the Council has debated and decided to credit five thousand Earth dollars as your salary."
"Salary?" His eyes unconsciously grew greedy as his thoughts wandered to what he could do for sandwiches with that money.
"Federation employment laws state that anybody working under the Council's jurisdiction must be paid. Use this five thousand dollars for your living expenses and anything else you might need to catch Jumba," she had a small laugh seeing 625's face fall when he realised that the money was not for sandwich usage. "I trust that you will have the self-control not to overspend. We don't allow bank overdrafts for temporary staff."
"Sure I won't," 625 reassured as he pocketed the bank card.
"Agent Pleakley," the Grand Councilwoman turned towards him, "you have your communicator?"
Pleakley took out a red round device, tapping the glass screen to ensure it was working, "It's charged and fully functional!"
"Very good. Contact me if anything goes wrong." The Grand Councilwoman turned just slightly to see 625 scowl out of the corner of her eye. Good. Having someone he doesn't trust fully being the one to communicate to his new superior would make him on edge.
"So, uh," 625 fidgeted, trying to get her attention, "is there anything else I need to know?"
"Yes, one last thing." The Grand Councilwoman turned back to 625, dropping her smile. Up to now, she had been in a cheery mood, so the sudden mood swing caused 625 to instinctively change his demeanour to a more guarded one.
"Do not fail this mission."
"I understand," he replied with a firm tone. He knew when to be serious and he most certainly knew what would happen if he made the Grand Councilwoman angry. She currently had all the cards and she had proven that back in his cell when he'd given in to her demands in the first place.
"Ma'am!" the Armada guard, who had been quiet until now, suddenly spoke up. "Big news! Tracker team just informed me over the radio that Jumba's getaway ship has made impact with Planet Earth!"
"Well then, I shall take my leave. I look forward to hearing news of your success."
The Grand Councilwoman raised her right hand to signal her departure before turning around to walk out of the ship with the Armada guard, leaving only Pleakley, 625 and Gantu left in the cockpit.
The trio stared at each other, uncomfortable at the sudden silence, at least until Gantu got irritated yet again. "Grrr!" he hit his fist against the controls. "Now we're nine hours behind that idiot scientist!"
"Hey, watch your mouth," 625 said, folding his arms. "That idiot scientist created me!"
"And that is the reason why I'm going to enjoy pressing additional charges on him after the handcuffs are slapped over his wrists! Annoyance, insulting a superior officer, and—"
"Hey, newsflash, you can't pin those charges on me. I was promised a walk outta this place by selling Jumba out!" 625 suddenly stopped talking, a troubling thought entering his mind. "Unless… you're planning to double-cross me?" he glared accusingly at Gantu.
"Of course not!" Gantu shook his head. "How I wish I could, though..." he added in irritation.
"What was that?"
"Nothing!" He made a mental note not to say his complaints out loud next time. "Anyway, I'm pinning them on Jumba because I can't charge you for your insubordination! Now follow orders and take your seat unless you want to fly around the cabin when I activate hyperdrive!"
"Oh, fine," 625 began to drag himself to the co-pilot seat. He knew that Gantu wasn't bluffing about that at least. When the Galactic Armada had captured him, they had tossed the experiment capsule containing him into the back. He had almost gotten sick when they flew off to Turo and the capsule he was in flew all over the place.
"Thank you," Gantu took a sigh in relief. He reached for the radio and adopted a professional, authoritative voice, "Requesting hyperspace clearance for sector zero-zero-five. Destination, Planet Earth."
"Please stand by for clearance," the person on the other end replied.
Ignoring Gantu as he initiated the takeoff sequence, 625 sat down on the co-pilot seat and fastened his seatbelt. "It's just an easy recon mission," he told himself, "Find your creator and you're home free." Beside him, Gantu was continuing to prepare the ship's takeoff, while Pleakley was flipping through a large encyclopedia about Earth. Glancing at Pleakley's encyclopedia, 625 noted something about Earth that worked to his advantage. "Huh, what do you know? The planet's covered mostly in water. If that's the case, the laws of probability state that there's a very high chance the ship crash-landed somewhere abandoned and no one found it. Good for me if that's the case." 625 took a yawn, the day's events finally getting to him. "The quicker I get this done, the sooner I can make and eat sandwiches again," he mumbled incoherently.
Before he dozed off in the co-pilot seat, 625 allowed himself one last conscious thought.
"Shouldn't take more than a day at best…"
Author's Note:
The second story arc begins! Our favourite aliens are on their way to Hawaii, or in some cases, have already reached Hawaii.
I feel like mentioning something about Moses' speech to Lilo. When I was younger, I was enrolled in basic martial art classes. The instructor would repeat the moves, lesson after lesson and practice after practice, just to ensure that we understood the basics. This is why I wrote that in, because Lilo missing a hula class like that would definitely impact her hula classmates as well. Just food for thought.
I also hoped that I characterised Mertle and her group of friends well. You'll have to understand that from their point of view, Lilo is someone very weird. And as anyone who has ever been a kid can vouch, weird people get teased mercilessly. This is one point the movie drives home excellently.
nightmaster000: I can guarantee you that the duo of 625 and Pleakley will behave together the way you probably expect them to. One snarky and lazy experiment paired with someone paranoid about trouble all the time? It'll be golden.
Although if I had it my way, I personally would have paired up 625 with Gantu just like in the show. Unfortunately, because of reasons that will be apparent later on, I can't have that happen in this story... but it doesn't mean 625 won't be able to taunt Gantu like he always does in canon. ;)
jurassicdinodrew: I've seen it. Alright, I won't lead you on, as of now I must admit that currently in my notes, romance does not play a huge factor in this story. That's not to say I can't add it in, but just a heads up so you don't get disappointed.