Guest and Whatfunny, I hope I prove you both wrong! I know Athos does seem out of character in the last chapter and perhaps even this one, but I feel like there's a reason for it and it does claw back soon! This story just felt more Athos to me after the first few chapters because of the troubles they both face. It is both easier and harder for him to understand and that's why it worked better as a plot. I feel like with Porthos it would have been done and dusted within a few more chapters because he's so much more of an open book. With Athos I feel like there's a slight desire to be wanted there even though he'd deny that even to himself. If he can't help himself I think he's likely to see a kindred spirit and feel like helping them will ease his own pain somehow. Who knows, maybe this is only something I can see but I appreciate the feedback! Keep it coming!

I am currently in planning stages of a much longer story in which Porthos will definitely be the eventual love interest! (This story will only be about 18 chapters or so.) I feel like it's a much better story for Porthos to get involved in whilst this was just something I couldn't get out of my head. Keep an eye out for that story because I'll be posting hopefully once I've posted all chapters of this!

In this chapter, Athos finally finds out a few of Elizabeth's secrets!

Chapter Eight - 4th July 1632

The wracking coughs began before Elizabeth was even fully awake. As the pain in her chest intensified, she opened her eyes blearily and almost screamed in fright. She had not shared a bed with another person, let alone a man in so many years that she was accustomed to sleeping alone. The sullen musketeer lay beside her under the counterpane, mercifully still asleep. As quietly as she could Elizabeth slid out of bed as she tried to hold her coughs in and rushed to the other side of the room where a bowl sat on the dresser. Elizabeth coughed into a piece of linen to try and muffle the sound, her breathing shallow and uneven as she tried to recover herself as best she could. Mornings were always the worst. It felt as if the coughs were coming from the very pit of her stomach and for a few moments Elizabeth thought she might vomit. Then she realised that she did not recall the last meal she had consumed. Not that it mattered of course, as she would not care for such trivial things as food in the weeks to come.

It was blood that she eventually coughed up into the bowel and Elizabeth stood looking down at it for the longest time, wondering just how much she was capable of before a coughing fit might kill her one day. She slid down to the floor and rested her back against the dresser, knowing a dizzy spell was imminent. Sometimes she was recovered from her morning attacks in minutes, but that morning she could not recall how long she had been out of bed. Her eyes kept flitting across the room to the man who still lay in her bed, appearing to be sound asleep. It was still early though and she hoped she could manage to return to bed before he could even tell that she'd left it.

Elizabeth knew why things were so much worse that morning of course. Tiredness affected her condition greatly, and she was sure she hadn't slept for more than three hours. She had no energy left to spend and coughed more blood into the linen cloth in her hand as she did not have it in her to stand at the dresser again. Eventually the coughs began to subside a little and she was left gasping for breath. As her breathing gradually began to slow to normal Elizabeth finally let herself believe what had occured the evening before. There was a dull sort of ache between her legs and in her thighs but it was not unwanted, nor was it really that painful. It was more an ache of tiredness, and of muscles used after so long dormant. Despite how ill she felt because of her rather exerted evening beforehand, Elizabeth felt a wave of something that served to calm her. She did not think it was happiness, for she could not atesst to one night lifting her mood so considerably. There was a contentedness about the room though, with the shutters still covering the windows and only a little light permiating through the cracks here and there. There was enough light for her to see, but it was not the harsh light that an open window afforded.

Elizabeth had almost forgotten what it felt like to be held by a man. In her first few months of marriage she liked to think she had enjoyed her love-making with Eric, but it had quickly faded to a feeling of duty and responsibility when Eric began to loose interest in her. After she had lost their child, he'd never touched her again and she'd not even felt like she was doing her duty as his wife. The musketeer had not made her feel inadequate. In all honesty, she had thought he was going to simply take what he needed and she was prepared and content to experience that. She would gave gained pleasure simply in being wanted for those few short moments. It had not been so. He'd wished to please her too. When she looked back upon her married life she really could not recall a time when she and Eric and ever made love in a way that was simply to please her. She had also been wrong about other things. She had half-expected the musketeer to leave once he had sated his need. She'd thought he'd not stay for much more than an hour. oh how wrong she had been. There was a reason she was so exhausted. Their tryst had only ended mere hours before the sun was due to rise and Elizabeth could not find it within herself to regret it.

With Eric it had been all duty and civility. The musketeer on the other hand, had not a civil tone in his body she thought. She grinned suddenly and hid the expression behind her hand even though there was no one to hide it from. In essence they hadn't done much talking once they'd reached her lodgings. They hadn't needed to. They were all tongues and hands and...

A blush was creeping up her sallow cheeks for the first time in at least four years. One soldier was able to do for her what her husband had not been able to do in the six years of their marriage. The wanton abandon with which he'd thrown her about had excited her, and the way in which he'd dragged her towards himself and held her close had made Elizabeth feel more needed than she ever had in her life. How was it possible that she was feeling thus for the first time? There was no wondering why she felt so poorly of spirit when she'd had so little sleep. Resolving to try and get some before the musketeer woke she pulled herself to her feet rather too quickly, and the movement set off another attack of wracking coughs that left her spitting into the bowl again.

At length she felt steadied enough to move again and returned to the bed. She had only just lain back against the pillows to close her eyes when she felt movement beside her. "Shall I send for a doctor Madame?"

She opened her tired eyes again to find the musketeer watching her intently. "A doctor? Whatever for? I'm perfectly fine. A little cold is all it is."

"Yes I'm sure thats not blood within that bowl over there," he replied. "You sound terribly ill. "Can I not fetch someone?"

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "I've seen enough doctors Monsieur to last me a life time. I do not need to see another one to tell me the same thing as the last ten have."

"What can you mean by that?"

Elizabeth watched his face as his expression softened and she wondered if she could tell him. She had yet to tell a soul and there was a huge part of her that was worried about his reaction. She did not know why, for she barely knew him at all and when he left her that morning she would have no need to see him again. He had told her that he believed she was truthful and she was no longer living with Eric so there would be no need for the musketeers to investigate her, or so she thought. What did it matter if one person knew? She would be leaving Paris soon enough.

"I'm dying Monsieur. Whatever this is..." Elizabeth gestured towards her chest. "It's killing me."

The shock upon his face almost tore her heart apart. Was that how all people would take her knews; sheer disbelief? She could readily understand his shock. To the outside world she was a reasonably well young woman of two and twenty. There could be no allowance for anyone thinking she was suffering with more than a slight cold. Perhaps it was a mark of how well she had hidden her suffering and her pain that he shook his head as he gazed at her, determined not to believe it. She did not correct her previous statement however, and she saw the acceptance reluctantly cloud his eyes.

"How long did they say you have?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "This condition of mine began in the tower when I was small. It's something that I've always had. It's grown rapidly worse over the last lot of months though. They have told me I have perhaps twelve weeks left, perhaps a little more if I take care of myself."

Athos was incredulous. "Twelve weeks...three months? Madame I do not..."

Elizabeth offered him a small smile as he moved closer to her on the bed. "You do not have to say anything Monsieur. What are we to one another after all? You shared my bed for a night. Do not think that you owe me anything at all."

"But I do not understand-"

"Do you think I understand?" Elizabeth cried and then she coughed again. "Do you not think I have questions Monsieur? All I know is that I have a condition of the lungs. I have been ill in some form for almost all of my life as a result of my incarceration in the tower of London. My mother has a similar condition but I think as she entered the damp rooms we shared as an adult, there was some kind of self preservation at work. There was no hope for me really when you think on it. I was brought up in those rooms. I did not really get the rest and recuperation I might have needed when I left though. I married Eric and we have spent most of our marriage travelling. I think I knew as soon as it began to get worse that there was no help for me."

"Where is your husband? Surely he has a responsibility of care towards you?" Athos seemed aghast as he stared at her. "Does he know?"

"Eric knows that I am ill of course, but he does not know that it shall kill me before long. I have the queerest feeling that he should not be told. He is like to make use of my ill health to benefit himself. He would wish to be pitied and revered. Indeed he would have the whole world thinking he was the most doted and caring husband. How much more money could he extort when he told people his wife was close to dying? No Monsieur, I would not have my husband know of my condition."

Athos nodded slowly. "I see within you a resolve to really be at the close of your marriage Madame. Perhaps in your condition such a decision is rash."

Elizabeth sat up in bed, suddenly weary of all of the talking. "I do not need my husband to take care of me! I have arrangements in place for when I am incapable of independence. There is money set aside and I know of such women who I may go to near the end. They will care for me in my final days. I entreat you Monsieur, do not think I hoodwinked you into some tryst with me to try and force your hand in any way. I have no expectations or wants of you except that when you leave my lodgings today you speak not of the night we have passed together. There is no need to tell a soul. After all, it's unlikely we will have cause to even speak again."

He threw her an indiscernible glance then as he too sat up and reached for his clothing which lay at the foot of the bed. "Madame I had no intentions of telling anyone anything at all. Indeed I do think we may yet have cause to speak again though. Surely you would have me continue my work in discovering what led to your father's death."

Elizabeth frowned. Her elated mood had truly dissipated as her mind turned to her father. "I try not to think of it," she replied suddenly very coldly. "There is a part of my mind that believes the answer is already before us."

Athos was standing then, his boots back on and only his doublet remained absent. "You are speaking of your husband I think Madame?"

Elizabeth nodded slowly. "I do not like to think such a thing, and deep down I know Eric would not hurt me in such a way, especially after my father helped him so. There is this niggling doubt within my mind though. Eric was involved in so many schemes. I had considered that someone who has been offended by my husband in some way might have taken such anger out upon my father."

"As of yet I do not believe you should be so downcast Madame." Athos crossed the room then and brought her a discarded robe from a chair. "We have yet to discover that your husband was in any way responsible for your father's death. Indeed of the little connections we have found, none lead to your husband. I know you consider your marriage over and might even say that your husband has treated you ill, but that does not make him a killer."

Elizabeth shrugged. "You see things very plainly Monsieur. You do not know the intricacies of my husband's mind as I do. What a peaceful life you must lead without all of this nonsense in your head." Elizabeth had no doubt her frustration was showing on her face, for the musketeer frowned at her.

"There really is no one I can fetch for you Madame?"

"I thank you but no. I am perfectly capable of managing things at present."

His doublet was found with little ceremony and he was once more ready to head out onto the streets. "Then well you endeavour to promise me something Madame? Will you call upon myself or any of my friends if you have a need to? We are to be found often at the garrison on the Rue du Bac. Even if it is only only to fetch a reputable doctor to you should you need the assistance. I feel that our intrusions into your life due to your husband's exploits may have had an adverse affect on your health. Let me make amends in some way."

Elizabeth offered him a small smile that was not a true reflection of how she felt inside. "Monsieur do not think so. I was already ill; already not long for the world. That is, stress is not something I long for but I have tried for a very long time not to let my husband's dealings bother me so. It is not something I can change, so therefore worrying is senseless."

He nodded and turned towards the door. Elizabeth was poised to release a breath when the door closed behind him but he turned back as if an afterthought had come to him. "Madame, did you mean what you said about us having no need to meet again? Not even..."

"Athos I do not wish to offend you. How is it possible that we can? I am ill, and you are surely busy. Indeed I did enjoy our time, and..." Elizabeth paused and dropped her face to stare into her lap as a blush crept onto her cheeks. "I cannot think of a time when I have felt more at peace and more content with my own self in a very long time, perhaps ever. I hope that you take from that explanation how glad I am for our night together. Let us not fool ourselves into thinking that we need to see one another together again in such a fashion though. I am afraid I am not sure I am up to it Monsieur. You see, I think I might be confined to my bed today after the exertions of last night."

he approached her again, letting the door swing closed behind him. Athos sat down on the bed on Elizabeth's side and lifted her chin with one bent finger. "Madame you must tell me what it is you want. Do not fill the air with wasteless excuses."

Elizabeth felt her cheeks heat even more at the mention of her telling Athos her desires. He had spoken so the evening before and it was as if he knew that she had never in her life had to make many choices for herself. They were all made for her first by the tower wardens and then by her husband and his family. It was an acute mark of respect that Elizabeth did not even think her father had shown her.

"That is just it Monsieur, I have no idea what I want. I have no experience of such freedom or liberation."

"Is that how you see it?" The look Athos levelled upon her sent shiver's down Elizabeth's spine. It was not pity, for that she had seen time and time again. It was more anger that he seemed to feel for her strife.

"How could it be anything else to me. I've been so closeted Monsieur. You must understand though that I did mean what I said in that I may not be up to much more than sitting here and talking for the most part. I am not what..."

Athos shook his head vehemently and took her hand in his. "Madame please do not say another word in contempt of yourself. I have no desire to hear it. You are a beautiful woman with a good heart. Any man should be honoured by your presence. I respect what you say though. I think perhaps we may find a way to secure a scheme by which we might meet again under such circumstances as last night when it is mutually beneficial and attainable for us both. Perhaps if you were to place a lit candle in that window with your curtains open when you wish for my company, I could be prevailed upon to call upon you when I see such an occurrence. If the candle is absent, I will be about my own business."

"That seems fair..." Elizabeth mumbled her agreement.

"Of course if you change your mind Madame, all you need do is never place a candle near that window at all."

with a gentle squeeze of her hand he was gone.