Chapter 3

Gabriella had driven to prom by herself, so she was saved the humiliation of a tearful ride shared with her mother. She hated Troy Bolton. He had ruined everything, and he had ruined it all in such a selfish way. She should have known there was something else in the way he had treated her. Troy Bolton didn't just go around telling girls they were beautiful; and he certainly didn't care about the girls he knew. She had seen him with other girls before. Gabriella hated to admit it, but she had watched him from afar since the eighth grade. What girl hadn't? He was Troy freaking Bolton. But she had seen the way he tossed girls aside once he had gotten from them what he wanted. Why had she expected to be any different? God, she hated him. But most of all, she hated herself. She should have seen it coming. Boys didn't lavish her with sweet words or sweep her away to magical rooftops. If anything, the most she got from boys was a glare for not doing their homework.

She felt so stupid as she drove home. Her tears wouldn't stop. She couldn't believe he had been so awful. He hadn't even taken her feelings into consideration. He had just wanted what he wanted. It didn't matter if he broke her heart. Hers was not the first (and most likely not the last). Gabriella couldn't understand why it had been so important for him to kiss her. So she had never kissed anyone. Why was that important? It had never made her special before. She had been a misfit because of it, among other reasons. She could live with being a misfit, but being a conquest wrenched her heart. He probably had a bet with his stupid friends. It was a wonder he had gotten to her first. She wondered who else was in the See who can kiss the loser Montez first game.

Oh he was such an ass hole! Without realizing it, Gabriella had made her way home, and she was currently bawling her eyes out in her driveway. She banged her fists against the steering wheel as various expletives crossed her mind. The only thing she had ever really really wanted in life was to meet a guy who looked at her the way she had seen other guys look at their girlfriends, so much love shining in their eyes. She wanted to be important and wanted and loved like that. All her life she had been vastly ignored by the opposite sex. Not once could she remember receiving a Valentine that was not mandatory, but she had held out hope. Her parents hadn't met until college, after all, and they had been married twenty years.

Gabriella had wanted her first relationship, first kiss, first everything, to be with someone who thought she meant something. Troy didn't care about her at all. She was just Gabriella Montez to him. Nothing more. Nothing less. She was just the shy girl who sat in the back of his history class; she was the girl he laughed at in gym for falling whilst trying to dribble a basketball and run simultaneously; she was the girl who had never kissed anyone and was easily targeted.

Gabriella looked at the red numbers shining on her dashboard. She hoped her parents were asleep. She didn't want them to see her like this. She was a complete mess because of some stupid boy. A stupid boy who had ruined her one dream of happiness. She sighed before gathering her dress into her arms and exiting the car.

Xxx

"Gabriella, is that you?" She heard her mother's voice as she entered the foyer. Mrs. Montez didn't wait for her daughter to respond, "Daddy was waiting up too. You just missed him, though. How was prom?"

Gabriella bit down hard on her lip. Her mother was just in the next room, and it would be impossible to elude her on the path that led to her bedroom. She really didn't want to talk. She just wanted to curl up and cry some more. Her mother's voice sounded so wonderful and full of hope that Gabriella began to cry anew, still not responding. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks as she realized that in a matter of minutes she would be crushing the hope in her mother's voice. She had been so happy when Gabriella had announced that she needed a dress for prom. Truthfully, Gabriella had debated the idea of prom for weeks. She didn't want to go. Why would anyone want to go all alone? But she remembered the look on her mother's face when they had seen other girls shopping for formal attire. All her mother really wanted was for her only daughter to be happy, and apparently she thought prom would make her happy, so internally Gabriella had conceded. She stopped fighting with herself and decided to go to prom. This was for her mother.

She just wanted to see her happy, Gabriella reminded herself. Elena Montez wanted everyone to love her daughter just as much as she did. Gabriella remembered every year, the month before her birthday, her mother would ask if she wanted a party. Wouldn't it be fun to have all of your friends over, Gabriella? Gabriella would always tell her no, claiming her birthday fell at a time when everyone was busy with holiday preparation and probably wouldn't be able to attend. This only stirred up other tactics. Her mother would suggest slumber parties or movie dates. Finally, when Gabriella was fifteen, her mother stopped asking about birthdays and social arrangements. She would just kiss Gabriella's forehead and tell her that she could do whatever she wanted for her birthday, never asking about weekend plans.

Gabriella had felt so badly about this (she always was a people pleaser) that she had made up plans a couple of times. She had told her parents she was going to an early movie one Saturday with some girls from school. In actuality, she had ended up at the park across town, spending two hours making daisy chains and playing hopscotch with a little girl who was sitting all alone whilst other children played—she had been that little girl once.

It had been a rare occurrence that Gabriella saw her mother act like a child, but she was sure to show the excitement of a little kid if Gabriella announced that she would be attending prom. That's what had made her mind. She wanted to see her mother that excited. She would attend prom alone and try to have as much fun as she could by herself.

Now she had to break her mother's heart. After going through so much trouble, she'd have to explain that prom had been nothing short of a failure. She would have to explain that her own heart had been broken by a careless boy. Gabriella didn't want to do any of that. She just wanted to disappear.

"Sweetheart," Mrs. Montez called, "are you all right?"

"Yeah, Mom. I'm okay." Her short answer silenced her mother for only the briefest second, just enough time for her to enter the foyer and find her teary-eyed daughter.

"Gabriella?" Gabriella looked up at her mother, a sad smile painting her beautiful face.

Elena Montez didn't wait for a response. She held out her arms, beckoning Gabriella. Gabriella rushed to her mother without a second thought, and she erupted in sobs.

"I tried, Mom, but I didn't have fun."

"Mi hija, it's okay. Everything is okay." Elena cooed. She felt Gabriella's tears begin to soak her shoulder, "Come. Let's sit down."

Elena led her distraught daughter to the living room, still holding her as they sat down on the sofa.

"Now what's got my sweet daughter so upset?"

Gabriella sniffed, "Mom, it was awful."

"What was awful, baby?" She gently prodded.

Gabriella's voice became a whisper, "I think he broke my heart."

Elena didn't speak, but Gabriella heard her sharp intake of breath. She began to coo and kiss Gabriella the way she had when Gabriella was a little girl. In Elena's arms, she felt like she was holding that little girl. Her sweet daughter was heartbroken and she seemed so small and delicate. Gabriella had made it eighteen years without ever mentioning boys. The possibility that she had an "intimate friend" had never crossed Elena's mind, and now, here she sat, holding her only daughter who was nursing a fresh heartache.

"Sweetie, I didn't even know you had a boyfriend," she spoke softly, careful to avoid accusation.

Gabriella sniffed once again before looking up at her mother, "I don't."

"Oh." Elena was completely lost. She didn't want to force Gabriella into talking before she was ready, but she had no idea what to say or how to help.

Her thoughts were put to ease as Gabriella snuggled into her side and began to speak again, "There's a boy who asked me to dance at prom. He's the most popular boy in school…"

Elena was afraid of where this story was going.

"He said that I was beautiful, Mom; and he danced with me even though everyone was staring; and he even showed me his rooftop garden that he had never shown anyone before," tears rolled down her face. "He looked at me like no one had ever looked at me before."

Elena maneuvered her arms and began to slowly unpin Gabriella's curly hair. "Baby, what happened? Did he hurt you?"

Gabriella shook her head, "Just my heart. He kissed me, Mom, but he only did it because I've never been kissed before. He didn't even like me. He just wanted to be the first person to kiss me. I think it was some stupid bet."

"Oh, Gabriella, I am so sorry. Boys can be cruel sometimes. I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you so badly. What did he do after he kissed you?"

"I cried. I basically told him that he was selfish and that I deserved to be kissed by someone who thought I meant something. Then, he hugged me and said he was sorry, but I ran."

"Gabriella," Elena soothed, "maybe he didn't mean to hurt your heart. He's just a teenaged boy."

"But, Mom, I wanted it to be with someone who loved me," Gabriella's flushed, tear stained face made Elena want to cry.

"He didn't know, mi hija. It's going to be okay."

"No, it isn't," Gabriella burst, "It's not okay. He shouldn't have done it. I can never get it back!" Gabriella evacuated her mother's embrace, preferring to pace the living room, crying hard into her hands. "No one has ever loved me, Mom," Gabriella spoke once her sobs lessened, "Not once have guys ever looked at me the way they look at other girls. I've been a wallflower and a reject since kindergarten," she was staring at her mother who looked just as broken as Gabriella imagined herself to look, "Remember in fifth grade when I wore long sleeves to school even in May and I told you it was because my classroom was so cold? I wore long sleeves because no one liked me, Mom. The girls who sat behind me would pinch my arms and leave bruises that I didn't want you to see. Boys called me ugly and girls bullied me," Gabriella saw the fresh tears in her mother's eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me, Gabriella?"

"Because you wanted so badly that I fit in. I couldn't tell you that everyone hated me for reasons even I didn't understand."

Elena stared at her beautiful daughter. She had been hurting since she was a little girl, and her own mother had not noticed. Elena couldn't understand how anyone could ever want to hurt Gabriella. She was kind and smart, funny and energetic. She was Elena's whole heart. She had carried her for nine months; she had nursed her; she had kissed her; and she had bandaged every scraped knee. She had read stories to the sweet little girl with pigtails and a big imagination. The past eighteen years of her life had revolved around loving Gabriella, and to find out that others had spent nearly as much time hurting Gabriella was unbelievable. How could anyone want to hurt someone as wonderful as her daughter?

"Just once," her daughter's words pulled her from her own whirling mind, "I wanted something for me. I didn't want to pretend for you and Daddy. I didn't want to suffer for other people's cruel amusement. I just wanted something simple and all for me. I wanted to be kissed by a boy who loved me, but even that was taken away." Silent tears trailed down the familiar paths of her cheeks.

"My sweet baby," Elena rushed to Gabriella, wrapping her in a gentle embrace. She held Gabriella's face firmly in her hands. They were both crying, "Don't you ever let those people get the best of you. You are magnificent, and you deserve all the love in the world. Never doubt that. You've never been anything but kind and generous and good. If someone doesn't see that, then they don't deserve you. You are so special, Gabriella, and if anyone else ever tells you that, don't forget it, because they are right. The people who see you and know that you're different and special are the ones that will mean something to you. They're the ones good enough to have you in their life."

Gabriella nodded.

"He called me special, Mom. Do you think he meant it?"

Elena offered a look of sympathy, "I don't know, baby. I wasn't there."

Gabriella bit her lip, trying to keep her voice from cracking, "Do you think I'll ever have what you and Daddy have?"

Slowly, Elena led Gabriella back to the sofa, "What is it that Daddy and I have, baby?"

Gabriella laid her head down in her mother's lap. She didn't know how to explain it. Her mother knew what she had with her husband, "Mom, you know," she rolled over and looked up at her mother, "I want my husband to be my best friend. I want to be as in love in sixty years as I am in the early years," Gabriella's voice cracked, "I wanted my husband to be the only person I ever kissed."

Elena smiled shyly, and Gabriella could make out the faint blush on her mother's face, "I love your father so much, Gabriella. What we have together is perfect for us, but it may not be perfect for you." She caressed one of Gabriella's cheeks, "You and your future husband are not me and Daddy. That's what makes love so special, mi hija. It's different for everyone."

Gabriella listened intently as her mother continued, "He doesn't have to be the first person you kiss. Chances are, whoever he is, he's already kissed multiple girls."

Gabriella hadn't thought of that. Of course, she knew it was a possibility, she just didn't dwell on it. Her mother continued, "It doesn't mean that he is going to love you any less. I think it's the opposite actually. Your husband will have had the opportunity to marry any girl in the world. He will have dated and kissed at least twenty other girls, but he'll pick you, Gabriella." Elena smiled at the sparkly realization that crossed her daughter's face, "Know why? Because he will see you and get to know you, and he'll see how special and perfect you are. You'll be the one he wants forever. Out of all the girls in the world, you'll be the one."

Gabriella listened with fresh insight. "Daddy and I have a beautiful relationship, Gabriella, but you will too."

Xxx

That night, Gabriella lay in her bed, contemplating the path her life had taken. She had gone eighteen years without the positive attention of any potential romantic interest. In a little over forty-five minutes, Troy Bolton had changed all of that. Her heart raced as she thought about him. She knew without a doubt that he had kissed her because no one else ever had. She wasn't stupid. But she thought that maybe there was something else too. He had held her so intimately and spoke so lovingly. He either deserved an Oscar, or he had meant what he said at least a little bit. She shivered as she remembered his breath on her face, warm and intoxicating.

Troy had tried to kiss her once before, she thought, but that was a long time ago. It had been sophomore year, at a party she had been strongly urged to attend. Nonetheless, even two years ago he had been sweet to her. No one else seemed to notice that she existed, but he had. He had made her shudder under his close proximity and warm hand. He had been the first guy to ever hold her hand. She'd come home after the party, choosing to lock herself in her room and stare at her hand for hours, immensely fascinated in the way it had fit so well with his.

She thought of the look in Troy's eyes on the rooftop. They had danced with happiness, and she couldn't help but think it was because of her. Troy had called her amazing and special, going so far as to tell her she needed a different boyfriend if he didn't make her feel worthwhile every day. Did he really feel that way? Did he think she was good enough to be showered with affection? If so, was her mother right? Was Troy someone who was meant to be in her life?

She had such doubts about Troy. She had even told him so, refusing to go any further with him when he whisked her away from prom, but his pleading had defeated her. She found out that her doubt was misplaced. Maybe it was here too. Why should she doubt that Troy really did like her? It was possible. Wasn't it? He had held her in his arms the way she imagined a lover would hold his beloved. She wanted so badly to be his beloved. He made her heart race, and she wasn't so sure it was just because he'd danced with her.

The first time Troy had ever spoken to her was in eighth grade. Her heart had thumped the same way then, as it had at the party and the prom. She wondered if Troy remembered eighth grade and Zeke Baylor's party. But even with such nice memories, she had not-so-nice memories of Troy too. Last year during a mandatory gym class he had laughed at her when she fell during basketball. If he liked her so much, why had he laughed?

Xxx

"Montez," Coach Bolton called, "You're up. Dribble from half court and shoot a lay-up." Gabriella nodded, her stomach twisting unceremoniously. She hated gym so much. If it wasn't a requirement for graduation, she wouldn't come within twenty feet of the gym.

Coach Bolton tossed her a basketball and she inhaled sharply before beginning. She dribbled a couple of times, then began to run slowly. It lasted her only a few seconds before her feet became twisted and her eyes couldn't figure out if they should look ahead or look down. She didn't have much time to debate however, because soon enough she was flat on her face, the taste of blood in her mouth.

"Ugh," Gabriella heard Coach Bolton groan. She also heard the laughter of her classmates. She stood and pressed her fingers to her lower lip. "Troy, take her to the nurse."

Gabriella looked over to see Troy Bolton laughing with Chad Danforth, "Sure thing, Dad."

She could walk herself to the nurse's office. She didn't need some basketball prodigy to belittle her all the way there. Troy waited for Gabriella to walk over.

"You okay?" He asked as they walked down the halls of East High.

She simply nodded, praying the conversation was over. They reached the nurses office only to see an 'Out to Lunch' sign hanging carelessly from the doorknob.

Troy looked over at her, "Don't worry. Dad has a first aid kit back in his office. C'mon."

She didn't want to go with him. He'd laughed at her, and he was bossy. But she was compliant by nature.

Troy dug through the tiny first aid kit as Gabriella sat awkwardly nearby. He took out a few different items before scooting his chair closer to Gabriella, so close their knees touched. With one hand (a hand that Gabriella noticed was shaking) Troy tilted her chin upward, "I have to clean it. It's gonna sting."

"Okay," she whispered, finding it hard to maintain eye contact. His intense blue eyes made her nervous. He dipped a cotton ball in rubbing alcohol before pressing it gently to Gabriella's bloody lip, his other hand still holding her chin.

Gabriella moaned in pain and Troy saw the tears prick at her eyes, "I'm sorry," he whispered, the air thick between the two.

Much to Gabriella's surprise, Troy blew a slow stream of air over her wet lip, "Feel better?" he mumbled.

"Yeah," she rasped. Troy let go of her chin so that he could open a tube of Neosporin, and she found that the absence of his hand was unsettling.

He brought her face back into his gentle grasp and with the thumb of his other hand, he rubbed the Neosporin unhurriedly over her inferior lip.

"Try not to lick it," he mumbled as he brought his finger away from her mouth, eyes glued to her own.

Xxx

He had laughed at her when she fell down in gym, but maybe she could overlook that. Maybe her not-so-good memory of Troy was actually one of her favorite and really-not-so-bad memories.