YAMI NO MATSUEI – DESCENDANTS OF DARKNESS

THE BEGINNING OF A BEAUTIFUL RELATIONSHIP –OR NOT?

Chapter Three: The Un-meeting of the Minds

"What...did you just say?"

Tatsumi looked at Watari, his gaze not wavering at all. "I said that I didn't take the promotion because I want to continue watching over everyone, most especially you."

The blonde scientist was near-speechless, yet he managed to say, "So you stayed this time because of me. What about the first time – the promotion that you were supposed to take years ago? Why didn't you take that one?"

"Exact same reason..."

Now Watari's forehead crinkled. He straightened his glasses, shifted his gaze for a minute, or did anything that he deemed inconspicuous so that he would stop feeling so uncomfortable and puzzled. "That first promotion was seven years ago. Why didn't you say anything then? Have you been feeling like this all this time?"

Tatsumi gave Watari a tightlipped smile and he turned around to face the lake once more, keeping his silence since he did not know what to say. His heart raced and he cringed, feeling as if his stomach was in knots. What else was there to say?

"Oh, I see…" said Watari, his demeanor slowly reverting to matter-of-factly although there was a part of him that wanted to lash out at the secretary. "So you're clamming up again?"

There was a split-second glint of anger that flashed in Tatsumi's eyes. "And your point being?"

"I deserve more than what you're doing right now. When will you ever learn to let people in?"

"That is the very reason why I didn't say anything, or in your terms 'let people in…' You deserve more. I can't give you what you need."

Being more than eager to return the glare, Watari asked in a calm yet icy tone, "You can't or you won't?"

"You don't understand…."

"You're right. I don't understand, and I won't understand."

Watari deadpanned after the long-standing silence between them, "Don't assume that you know me that well. You don't know what I deserve or not. You don't know what I need or don't need in my existence. Before tonight, have you bothered talking to me about it before?"

Tatsumi's voice was strained and his tone defensive as he replied, "I'm telling you now…."

Watari's cold words and his harsh gaze aimed at his companion. Although his tone was not laced with blame, the raw truth behind his words hurt more. "You've made up your mind about me. You've passed judgment against me without talking to me or asking me first."

Feeling backed up against an emotional wall, Tatsumi gave Watari one of his trademark death glares – the very ones that he reserved to give people such as Chief Satori and Muraki Kazutaka. His voice, as even as it sounded, dripped of anger and a threat, "What do you want from me? What are you expecting from me?"

Undeterred and unfazed, Watari looked at the other. As matter-of-factly as he had been all this time, he kept his calm. The fire in his eyes was still there, yet his tone took a gentler veil. "Nothing more than what you're willing to give or share…and for you to stop thinking that I want something more than what I really want. To let people in your life for once…to let me in your life…. You and I both want to try and see what's in store for us. A friendship and something beyond that if both of us wish it. Now's a perfect time as before…."

Leaning against the railing and letting his volatile emotions to cool down, Tatsumi then shifted his gaze to the waters before them. "You tell me not to judge you, yet you assume too much about what I feel. What makes you think that I want the same thing as you?"

Watari kept his composure so that only he knew what was going on inside him, "Am I wrong, Tatsumi Seiichiro?"

The two gazed at each other for a very long time, neither one of them willing to bend.

The pet owl flew back to both men happily yet her cheerful chirp changed tune as she felt the ongoing tension. She landed on Watari's shoulder, hooting softly as if she was asking him what was wrong.

Smiling softly and pushing aside any pent-up emotions, Watari asked the other with his usual lighthearted tone, "It's getting rather late. Do you wish to go somewhere else while we're here in Chijou, Tatsumi-san?"

"No, no…. Let's walk you home…."

After shrugging his shoulders, Watari shook his head then told Tatsumi, "You don't have to – "

Raising his hand, Tatsumi interjected, "I insist…and I'm sorry….."

"Let's just forget about it….and just go home. Next time will be more comfortable for both of us – provided that there will be a next time?"

Tatsumi replied along with a pursed-lipped smile, "Of course there'll be a next time. Why won't there be one?"

After having a gentle smile escape his lips, Watari waved his hand once they reached a safe corner. When the portal leading back to Meifu was in place, the three stepped through it and within a course of minutes they were now at the park where Tatsumi waited for him.

The wind blew colder and stronger still, and the sakura petals that blanketed the ground began to be blown away by the breeze. New petals also fell to the ground shortly before they too were carried away by the bitter cold wind.

Pulling out his muffler and wrapping it around his neck, Tatsumi said, "I have my car. I'll drive both of you there."

It was a short walk, but Watari nodded and rode at the passenger side of Tatsumi's car.

During the drive, many thoughts plagued Tatsumi's mind and before he could make sense of it all they arrived at Watari's place.

Watari told Tatsumi, his tone and his demeanor being as if nothing had transpired between them, "Thank you, Tatsum-san. We'll see you on Monday…."

"Watari-san –"

Then the two respectively froze as Tatsumi rested his hand on Watari's hand to stop the other from leaving. There was so much to say, yet he could not say anything since he did not know where to start…especially when Watari said, "Everything's fine. No worries…."

A couple of minutes later, a still-speechless Tatsumi saw Watari step out of his car and waved farewell to him. What bothered the secretary most was that Watari was calm about everything.

That was what Tatsumi thought….

As soon as Watari entered his apartment and closed the door behind him, he leaned against the door and closed his eyes. His mind was a garbled mess as well, this moment being one of the rare times in his life that he lost it….

Well, almost lost it….

003 softly hooted and affectionately rubbed her face against Watari's, with her still not consoled even though Watari said in feigned cheer, "I'm fine, girl. Now let's rest. We have a long day tomorrow with experiments, remember?"

After letting out a couple more soft hoots, 003 flew inside Watari's bedroom and nestled in her resting place.

Closing his eyes once more, Watari took a couple of deep breaths to ease the weight in his chest. Upon removing his glasses, the first few teardrops betrayed him. He clenched his fists in near-vain efforts to gather his composure, one hand still holding his flimsy glasses.

The blonde secretary then went through his uneventful routine before going to bed, with him smiling ruefully as he saw 003 now asleep. "Did time pass that quickly? I didn't realize it was this late."

Watari had earlier thought that the evening with Tatsumi was torture due to the uncomfortable pockets of silence as well as the subtle battle of will and words between them. He now realized that lying in bed thinking about what could have been and why matters did not unfold more happily for him was unbearable. The usually-decisive scientist now wanted to kick his own head for not facing Tatsumi head-on with such delicate matters.

Taking a deep sigh, Watari then bit his lip knowing that it was already too late and he had to face the consequences of his actions the next time that he saw Tatsumi. Once that he did manage to fall asleep, his sleep was fitful.

And at one point, Watari thought as he let part of his frustration bubble to the surface while trying to get back to sleep, "I'm tossing and turning while that smug, red pencil-wielding, uptight nut must be sleeping soundly in his bed! Why the hell should I worry about it when he surely doesn't give a hoot?"

Little did the blonde scientist know that Tatsumi was not sleeping soundly, nor was he in the comfort and warmth of his bed at home….

Tatsumi remained outside Watari's apartment, his mind and emotions both turbulent as he kept recalling the conversation between Watari and him. Staying in his car while doing his best to filter through his feelings, he too blamed himself on why matters had gone so wrong this evening between them.

Another fact that Watari did not know was that this was not the first time that Tatsumi stayed outside his apartment. Over the past few months, the secretary had been doing his best to gather the courage to say what needed to be said. He hoped that once that courage had set in deep within his being, he would step out of the car, ring Watari's doorbell, and just say everything that he felt about the other.

Yet each evening that he did so, Tatsumi ended up going home shortly before dawn sleepless and empty-handed. He hoped and prayed that tonight would be different, most especially since he knew and felt that Watari deserved much more than what transpired between them.

The hours passed so slow and torturous for both Tatsumi and Watari.

As dawn came, Tatsumi started his car and drove home with a heavy heart. He did not know what to say or do before, and for some reason still unknown to him it would be more difficult to do so now.

End of Chapter Three

Normal Disclaimer

I do not own Yami no Matsuei and its lovable characters. However, I do own this fic and Chief Satori and other original characters.