Blaine let Kurt sleep for a few hours. He knew he must be tired after staying up to celebrate Christmas with his parents and then flying out to be with him. He just laid there holding Kurt in his arms, thinking about how they had gotten there. Nearly a year ago they had met, and to Blaine it almost seemed like a lifetime ago.

Blaine would have let Kurt sleep as long as he needed to, but he was starting to get hungry and couldn't bring himself to slip out of bed to get food for them while Kurt was sleeping. Not today, not without warning. Instead he pulled Kurt closer, kissed his cheek gently and whispered in his ear, "Kurt."

Kurt snuggled in Blaine's arms, and a contented hum escaped his lips, but he didn't open his eyes.

"Kurt," Blaine tried again. "Do you want to go with me to get food?"

Kurt turned over in Blaine's arms and tangled their legs together. "No, let's stay in bed. This is much nicer than going outside."

Blaine chuckled, "It is, but I am starving. You can stay here if you want to. I don't mind."

Kurt opened his eyes and practically pouted, "It isn't the same if you aren't here."

Blaine kissed the pout away. "I won't be gone long, maybe half an hour. You want anything special?"

"I'll go with you. It isn't fair to send you out in the cold alone," Kurt said but didn't make to move.

Blaine kissed him again. When he pulled away he said, "We should go"

Kurt slowly got out of bed allowing Blaine to do the same. He was quiet as they got dressed but still shared sweet smiles with Blaine anytime he caught his eye. Blaine called the restaurant to place their order, and after they bundled up for the cold, they headed out the door.

They walked through the streets of New York, hands clasped but not talking. Kurt waited outside the small restaurant while Blaine ran inside to pick up their food. As soon as Blaine emerged with two paper bags, Kurt took one bag and then took Blaine's free hand in his own.

"Can we talk about something?" Kurt asked, his voice small.

Blaine looked over at Kurt's worried face, and his heart thudded in his chest. "Anything," he said sincerely.

Kurt stared off in the distance. He could have been looking at the Christmas lights in a far off window, but Blaine knew he was thinking of how to say what he wanted to. He took a deep breath, "I want to try something, but… I'm… scared."

Blaine squeezed his hand, trying to reassure him, while having no idea what he was talking about. He did feel better that Kurt was sharing his fears with him instead of running away from them.

"What are you scared of?"

"My reaction, not wanting it as much as I think I do." Kurt said, eyes looking away from Blaine.

"Kurt," Blaine said pulling him to the side of the sidewalk and stopping until Kurt looked at him. "Please tell me what you are talking about."

Kurt looked surprised, like he suddenly realized he hadn't actually said what he wanted.

"I want to bottom, I want to try anyway, but I'm afraid of what my reaction will be."

Kurt started walking again, and Blaine kept pace. He chose his words carefully. "First, I want to say, I am more than happy with what we are doing, what we have done. But… if this is something you really want to do, we can work up to it. And if it is something you can't do, it's okay."

"The thing is," Kurt said, sounding frustrated, although Blaine suspected it wasn't at him. "Wanting to bottom, it isn't something that I want often, there are just times, like earlier when I wanted nothing more. I don't want my past to take that away."

"What about earlier?" Blaine asked.

"When I was in your lap, and your cock..." Kurt whispered even though they were alone. "All I could think was that I wanted you in me. And then you kept teasing me. I would have begged for it right then, but I knew it was something I needed to think about first. And that has been all I have been able to think about since."

Blaine could feel his body heating up at the thought of being inside Kurt, and he squeezed his eyes shut trying to have a rational thought.

"We can try, if that is what you want. I certainly won't object. If you get uncomfortable or want to stop all you have to do is say the word. I don't ever want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable."

Kurt smiled shyly at him, "I trust you completely. There are just some things I don't know if I can handle."

"Then tell me," Blaine appealed.

Kurt took a centering breath. "Condoms are a must. I'm up for the discussion if you don't want to use them when you bottom… but I'm not there yet. Not after…"

"Of course," Blaine whispered.

"I need to be able to see you, to know it's you." Kurt continued. "I think that is most important."

Blaine couldn't help but lean over and kiss Kurt's cheek. "You know you could always be in control, if that would make it better."

Kurt shook his head, "I don't know, see when I want to bottom, it is because I want to give up control. I want to just feel and react. Plus, I want to give myself over to you. I mean if that is how it happens organically, then great, I just don't want that to be the only way we can do it."

"I think I understand," Blaine nodded.

Kurt looked away almost as if he was embarrassed.

"You will have to go slow; it has been a long time. I haven't been able to touch myself like that… not since… I haven't wanted to."

"Kurt, I promise, if we do this… I will take care of you," Blaine said, stopping in front of his building.

Kurt looked at him with fear in his eyes.

"What if I can't tell you to stop? What if I freeze and…"

"Hey," Blaine cut him off gently. "I promise, if you are not enthusiastically into it, I would stop in a heartbeat. I love you, Kurt, and I would never do anything to hurt you."

"I know, I know." Kurt said ducking his head trying to hide his tears. Blaine let go of his hand to tilt his head so their eyes met and wiped the tears away.

"I love you, Blaine. And I promise I want this."

"Why don't we go upstairs and eat our food, and then we can see what happens. No pressure, no expectations, just us. Okay?" Blaine said pulling him into a sweet, gentle kiss.

When they pulled back, Kurt said in a high, thin voice, "Okay."

Upstairs they spread their food out on Blaine's coffee table and left the conversation from outside. They talked about what they would do the next few days. Kurt had already taken the time off work and didn't plan on letting them know he was actually in New York. They relaxed into the familiarity of each other as they shared their Christmas meal of Chinese take-out.

As they were cleaning up the remnants of their food, Kurt asked, "Do you mind if I take a shower?"

"Of course not. A shower does sound great," Blaine smiled.

"I need to grab some things out of my bag. Why don't you shower first?" Kurt asked, a hopeful look in his eye.

Blaine grinned at Kurt, "We could save water and shower together."

Kurt's laugh was genuine, but he said, "Not this time. I think I need a few minutes alone. I am not, however, averse to sharing many showers with you in the future."

Blaine approached Kurt and took him in his arms kissing him firmly. When he pulled back he confided, "I understand. I'll just be a few minutes."

Blaine turned to walk away, but Kurt caught his wrist. His eyes were dark, and he purred, "Don't bother with clothes after and… I'll meet you on your bed."

Blaine nodded with a blush. It amazed him the way Kurt could affect him with merely his words. How he could turn on a dime from being almost shy and insecure to bold and sexy in a moment's time. He worked quickly in the shower, cleaning himself but not taking unnecessary time. He quickly dried himself, wrapped the towel around his waist and left the bathroom with his curls still dripping on his forehead.

Kurt trailed his fingers across Blaine's chest as he passed, his other hand full of toiletries. He gave Blaine a knowing smirk; seeing the effect he had on Blaine, he stepped in the bathroom then closed the door.

Blaine removed his towel from his waist and quickly rung the rest of the water from his hair. He listened to the rattle of the pipes as they turned on and then settled himself under the covers of his bed. Blaine laid in bed listening to Kurt humming in the shower, the water falling, and resisted the temptation to touch himself at the images that danced in his head of Kurt's body glistening, drops of water trailing over and across his tattoos. Blaine closed his eyes and focused on calming his erection down.

The pipes rattled again, and the water shut off. Kurt's humming continued and Blaine focused on that sound as he waited for the door to open. He heard the click of the door opening and opened his eyes. Kurt was walking towards him, naked and half hard. Blaine couldn't pull his eyes away from his long limbs and toned muscles as they shifted, bringing Kurt closer to him.

When Kurt reached the bed, he slid under the covers, brushing up against Blaine's body teasingly.

"That's better," Kurt sighed.

Blaine scooted closer and pressed his forehead against Kurt's and caressed his cheek. "You are so beautiful," he murmured before kissing him long and deep. Kurt threw his leg over Blaine's hips, pulling his body even closer with his foot. They lay on their sides kissing, their cocks brushing lightly, not yet trying to get each other off, but enjoying the feel of each other. Hands explored by feel alone, as they kissed. Kurt's skin was impossibly soft after his shower and still slightly damp under his hand. Kurt was making delicious humming noises, which Blaine found himself instinctively harmonizing with his own low noises.

Blaine lost himself in the feel of Kurt's body against his, not needing more in the moment than just to have Kurt against him, kissing him like he needed him to breathe. His hand smoothed its way to Kurt's ass, gripping it, pulling him even closer. They rutted against each other, the not quite wet enough drag perfect in its own way.

Kurt pulled back just enough to mewl, "Please," against Blaine's lips before diving back into the the kiss. Blaine guided Kurt onto his back and hovering over him, deepened the kiss. He ran his hand up Kurt's side and used his thumb to tease Kurt's left nipple. Kurt broke the kiss, throwing his head back with a long low moan. Blaine moved his mouth to Kurt's neck, nibbling the juncture of neck and shoulder still teasing his nipple because he knew it drove him wild. Blaine kissed his way across Kurt's shoulder to the music twinning around his arm.

Blaine used his tongue to trace the lines, kissing each note. Kurt squirmed underneath him, pushing his hips up seeking friction. Blaine shifted his weight, letting Kurt rut against his hips, and he finally took Kurt's nipple in his mouth. He flicked the nipple ring with his tongue knowing exactly how to drive Kurt mad.

Blaine continued to lavish affection on Kurt's body, sliding ever lower so he could kiss every inch of his torso. Soon he found himself kneeling between Kurt's splayed legs, his long, thick, hard cock dripping precome, calling to be sucked. Blaine didn't resist. He laved the salty juice as if it were ambrosia. Kurt cried out above him in pleasure, and Blaine had to pin his hips to the bed. He savored the honor of sucking Kurt's bare dick; the taste, the feel of soft flesh sliding over hard, smooth tissue, the ache of his jaw trying to accommodate his girth. Blaine was losing himself to euphoria of making Kurt feel good when he felt Kurt batting at his head. He slid his mouth back up Kurt's cock and looked up at him. He was holding the bottle of lube in his hand.

Kurt panted a moment, trying to catch his breath looking at Blaine with dark eyes. "Make love to me," he said breathlessly, his voice high with desire.

Blaine was about to ask if he was sure, but the look in Kurt's eyes was enough of an answer; his gaze was strong, sure, and filled with so much love and trust, Blaine was filled with the same sureness.

Even though they had talked about it earlier, he still didn't imagine that this would happen, not so soon. He felt the weight of trust Kurt was putting on him, and knew he would bear it gladly.

Kurt placed his left foot on the bed, giving Blaine easier access. Blaine kissed Kurt's knee as he popped the top on the bottle and coated two fingers. Blaine laid himself between Kurt's legs, pillowing his cheek against the leg still on the bed. He traced Kurt's hole with his wet fingers slowly watching the muscles contract and relax. He added more lube, watching Kurt's face intently, and he brought the finger back to his hole. He carefully pushed the finger in, meeting first resistance before it was pulled in. Kurt's breath sped, but his lips turned up in a smile. Blaine twisted his finger, as he pulled out before pushing back in.

When the motion became easier he pulled it out, before adding more lube and pushing back in with two fingers. Kurt whined above him, but before Blaine could worry, Kurt was pushing his ass down on Blaine's fingers. He opened Kurt up, twisting, scissoring and pumping his fingers. Above him Kurt keened, "More! Please!"

Three fingers breached Kurt's hole, and a low, deep growl filled the air. "Oh God! Perfect!" Kurt cried. Blaine used his fingers to ready Kurt, marveling at the effect it was having on the man he loved. He writhed above him, hands clutching his hair as Blaine's fingers brushed nimble against his prostate. He continued opening him up, waiting for Kurt to show him he was ready.

Kurt lifted his head off the pillow and looked desperately down at Blaine.

"Please, I need you," he whimpered, like he would be lost without Blaine inside him.

While being so careful preparing Kurt, ensuring he was okay, Blaine had forced his own desire to the back of his mind. It came back in full force seeing the need in Kurt's face.

Blaine kneeled again, and reached over Kurt's prone body to grab a condom.

"Sit up," he whispered. Kurt gave him a searching look but did as he was asked.

Blaine took the pillows and arranged them to his liking. He placed two pillows against the wall and placed another flat at their base. "Lay back against those pillows with your ass here," he told Kurt patting the edge closest to him on the bottom pillow. Like that Kurt was lounging back against the pillows, not prone, but propped and Blaine had access to his ass. It looked like the perfect position. Blaine rolled the condom down his own achingly hard cock. He kissed Kurt long and hard until Kurt relaxed under his hand.

"I love you," Blaine murmured against his lips before pulling back.

Kurt looked at Blaine with amazement, "I love you, too." He answered.

Blaine gently pushed Kurt's knees up and back, exposing his gaping hole once more. Kurt grabbed his knees keeping them spread as he looked at Blaine with those trusting, loving eyes, so dark with need. Blaine slicked his cock before gripping the base and guiding it to Kurt's ass. Kurt's eyes closed, and his head lolled back as Blaine began to push in. He slowly worked his way into Kurt's body, pushing in, pulling back before pushing in again. Blaine watched Kurt's eyes flutter with each movement until he was balls-deep in Kurt's magnificent ass.

Blaine stilled trying to control his breathing and the overwhelming sensation of being inside Kurt.

"I'm ready," Kurt assured him after a few moments adjusting.

Blaine huffed, "I need a minute. God, you are perfect. If I move now I might come."

Kurt tried to laugh, but it turned to a moan at the slight movement. "We can't have that before you really fuck me," he teased with a smile.

Blaine kissed the smile away until Kurt threw his head back as Blaine slowly pulled back. He kept his thrusts slow and even at first, still gauging Kurt's reaction. His worries soon disappeared seeing Kurt's reactions. He was by far the most expressive, vocal lover he had ever had, and he wasn't shy about telling Blaine exactly how to make him feel good.

"Oh, right there!" Kurt cried, fisting his own hair and exposing his neck to Blaine's hungry mouth. The rub of Kurt's prostate sent lighting bolts through his body. The hot squeeze of Kurt's ass became the center of his universe, the taste of Kurt's skin a blessing.

Kurt's legs latched around his waist, restricting his movement.

Kurt whined, "Harder, faster."

Blaine grabbed one of Kurt's legs and rested it on his shoulder, kissing the calf as he fucked in deeper, speeding his thrusts. He could feel the tendrils of his control waning but tried to focus on the tantalizing noises Kurt was making.

"Blaine," Kurt chanted, needing something but clearly unable to articulate it properly.

Blaine slowed his hips for a moment, trying to give Kurt a chance to speak.

"No!" Kurt begged.

Blaine ran a hand down Kurt's thigh as far as it he could. "What do you need?" he asked.

"Touch me," Kurt pleaded.

Blaine couldn't reach Kurt's cock, one hand was supporting his weight, the other was trapped behind his leg. Blaine raised up on his knees, using one arm to lift Kurt's hips, while the other hand grabbed his beautiful cock. Blaine renewed the vigor of his thrusts, pumping Kurt's cock in tandem, going deeper than before. If the noises Kurt was making were anything to go by the change was welcome. Kurt babbled half formed moans and words, his body trembling as his head jerked with each thrust.

Blaine could see he was close and let himself edge closer to his release. He felt like he was about to snap, but wouldn't let go until Kurt had come. Kurt's babbles morphed into Blaine's name which became a mantra, egging Blaine on. With a shout, Kurt clamped hard around Blaine's dick and came, like a nuclear blast, just before Blaine's own orgamsm hit. Blaine's mind was obliterated, and he stilled. He had just enough presence of mind to pull out of Kurt's body and lowered it to the bed, before the collapsed beside him.

They lay there spent, side by side, catching their breaths for a moment. Blaine disposed of the condom and grabbed a wipe from the bedside table. When he turned back to Kurt he noticed his body shaking with sobs, covering his face with his arm.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Blaine asked, carefully touching his shoulder.

Kurt moved his arm, and Blaine didn't see sadness there. "Nothing," Kurt said amazement coloring his voice.

Blaine quickly cleaned Kurt's chest, layed back down and spooned behind Kurt, pulling him close.

"Talk to me, please," Blaine whispered into his ear.

Kurt wiggled closer. "It was perfect. You were perfect. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"Kurt…" Blaine admonished.

"I think I had my own emotional overload. It's just… I was scared I would never have this. Not just bottoming but everything. I was scared for so long and I nearly let that fear lose you. I tried to push you away, but you are everything I need," Kurt babbled. "Plus that was the best I have ever felt after bottoming."

Kurt's laughter, eased Blaine's soul. "So, this wasn't a one-time thing?" Blaine asked.

Kurt rolled over so he was facing Blaine. His eye lashes were clumped together, but no more tears fell. "No, not a one time thing. I still prefer topping, but yeah… I think we will be doing that again."

"Good," Blaine said kissing him softly. "I love the way you take care of me, but sometimes I want to take care of you, too."

"Let me cuddle you," Kurt said rubbing their noses together for a moment.

Blaine rolled over and let Kurt wrap his arms around him. They lay there in silence, just basking in the moment. He could feel Kurt relaxing behind him, the weight of Kurt's body resting more firmly against him. Sleep was laced in his voice when Kurt murmured, "I love you."

"I love you," Blaine replied, unsure if Kurt was awake enough to hear him. It didn't matter to Blaine if he did. I have a lifetime to tell him, Blaine thought.

He laid there, sleep tugging at him, and thought about how far they had come. When he first spied Kurt from the dance floor he couldn't have known just how much Kurt would shake his world to its core. Kurt nuzzled closer in his sleep, and Blaine drifted off to sleep thinking how happy his first one night stand had turned out.