YAMI NO MATSUEI

THE BEGINNING OF A BEAUTIFUL RELATIONSHIP…OR NOT?

Chapter Seventeen – In-Character

To the Reader

For those who are not familiar with Yami no Matsuei (YNM) or Descendants of Darkness, this anime/manga series is shounen-ai (guy/guy relationships or suggestions of such). This entire fan fiction has a PG-13 rating due to its content and keeping in line with how the actual anime and manga are rated.

Timeline of this fanfic

Thanks for your patience in waiting very long for this next story update.

The timeline / setting of this fanfic is immediately after the incidents at the end of Kyoto Files Revisited and a year before Apocalypse Rising. This fanfic is stand-alone, which means that it is not necessary for the reader to have read KFR and Apocalypse to understand this fanfic's plot.

The latter part of this fic would also pick up parts that have been touched upon by the fic The Shadows of My Past. Again, it is not required for one to read Shadows in order to understand the plot for the fic you are about to read – especially since events touched upon in Shadows will be mentioned at a much later part of this fic Once I do get to that part, I will mention it as part of the author note at the chapter(s) concerned.

This fic is also intended to be much shorter than the fics that I normally write. I need to give my YnM muses a peace offering.

For the benefit of those who have not read KFR and those who have read it a while back, the Shokan Division's primary mission / case has gone to a close. Watari Yutaka invites Tatsumi Seiichiro to go out to dinner. Tatsumi accepts the invitation.

Shortly before the invitation, Tatsumi had finished talking to and threatening Chief Satori of the Preservation Bureau. More importantly, Tatsumi once again turned down a promotion that Lord Enma offers him – a promotion that would have placed him on equal footing with Chief Konoe if he had accepted the position.

After accepting the invitation, Watari and Tatsumi agree to meet in the evening.

And this is where the fic picks up from….

Disclaimer

By the way, I do not own Yami no Matsuei and its lovable characters. However, I do own this fic and Chief Satori and other original characters.

Please sit back and enjoy reading. I hope that you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing this and the fics that I have been writing. Let me know what you think via reviews (especially if there are things that can be improved for the subsequent chapters, or things that you would like to keep or see as the story progresses.

"Seii, please be all right… Please stay strong…" were the repeated words that echoed inside Watari's head as his honey-colored gaze remained transfixed throughout the evening on a fever-ravaged Tatsumi. As much as his body felt the dire need for sleep, he pulled up a chair and stayed beside Tatsumi's canopy bed. He knew that he dozed off a few times here and there. For him, the evidence was the blankets he used to cover up Tatsumi's body moments ago were now tossed aside the next moment he opened his eyes.

Tatsumi's shadows moved quietly since their master and Watari came home, taking the form of hazy black fog that pooled around Watari's feet and surrounded the bed.

Watari, feeling pity and helplessness over the situation, deemed it best to loosen Tatsumi's sleeping gown even further and use just one blanket. He hoped that the act would be enough to keep Tatsumi somewhat protected from the cold yet relaxed as the heat inside the latter's body ached for escape. He banked on the fact that a person, even in a state of delirium or sleep, maintained the innate sense of knowing what would be best for the body…that maybe shoving the blankets away was his weakened lover's way of regaining a semblance of comfort.

Taking in a deep breath, and then letting out a soft sigh, Watari rested his head on Tatsumi's bed while held on to Tatsumi's hand as one of his ways to give the other comfort. He closed his eyes, telling himself, "Just for a second…."

Minutes later, Watari's fatigue had taken over and he easily drifted to sleep. He was too tired to think about or take off his glasses before his body gave in to its request for rest even if it was just for a moment.

That moment became a little over an hour…

It was still in the middle of the night when Watari stirred awake, his worries immediately flooding back inside him as he felt that he was no longer holding Tatsumi's hand. When he lifted his head, he saw that a still-sleeping Tatsumi had a piece of paper clutched in his hand. He became more tight-lipped as he saw Tatsumi's feverish struggles seemed to have taken a turn for the worse, for now Tatsumi tossed, turned, and breathed deeper than usual.

In the middle of the delirium, Tatsumi continued to mumble in his sleep. Although Watari knew that Tatsumi was calling out for him, it was painful to hear Tatsumi have another name escape from his lips in such a state.

Watari once again reached out for Tatsumi's hand and firmly held it. He became teary-eyed, telling his lover in a near-whisper, "Are you sure that we need to go through with it this way, Seii? We might lose more than just your memories…Tell me what to do so that you'd get through this and be fine in the end? I'll do anything to make sure of that…just tell me what to do…"

Watari's thoughts snapped back to reality as Tatsumi's hand twitched, the latter calling out for him once more. He murmured, "I'm sorry, I could barely hear you…."

"Where…am I…?"

"You're at home and in bed. I'm here. Just rest for now. We'll talk more in the morning, and I won't leave your side."

"Have work to do…" Tatsumi mumbled while his eyes remained closed, his lips barely opening as he spoke.

"The work can wait in the morning," said Watari as gently as he could. "It's you that needs attention now. You're deathly sick and I'm your doctor, so close your eyes and rest…"

"Lord Reiley… Your doctor… Is…that all what I…you…we are now to each other?"

Watari's heart clenched as he felt the hurt laden behind Tatsumi's mumbled words. His eyes continued to be transfixed on the one that lay on the bed, a mixture of hope and worry swelling inside him as he saw Tatsumi open his eyes.

It hurt Watari more to see Tatsumi like this—those expressive, piercing blue eyes of his lover screaming out the conflicted and wounded emotions mingling and intensifying his weakened body's continued and failing battle against the delirium and fever.

What pained Watari the most was when Tatsumi finished his struggled words to him, when the latter asked, "Is…that all that we are to each other now? Since when you have become so cold…?"

It was perfectly clear to Watari as to who was speaking before him, although the truth baffled and hurt him so much in so many ways. It was not just Tatsumi Seiichiro. It was not just Lord Radcliff Reiley. It was both.

"We'll talk about this in the morning…please rest…."

As a response, Tatsumi closed his eyes. It was a heavy weight in Watari's heart when Tatsumi, as sick and as weak as he was, withdrew his hand from Watari. He watched his lover interlocked the fingers of his own hands and let it rest on his stomach, preferring no contact or touch even if it meant comfort to weather through his agony or even if his life depended on it.

A few moments later, Tatsumi fell asleep.

Watari, now having guilt add to the many emotions that have been plaguing him, closed his eyes and rested his head once more on Tatsumi's bed. He, and Tatsumi's errand shadows, stayed by Tatsumi's bedside.

Watari woke up from the light flooding in the room and the sound of drapes being drawn to let air and sunlight in.

"Good morning, Doctor Wilkins!"

The first thing that Watari noticed was the empty bed. Looking at Ran—or Anthony Crowder in this make-believe world, Watari asked, "Where's Lord Reiley?"

"The Count is in his office, sorting through paperwork, Sir."

A small amount of hope warmed Watari's heart. "He broke through the fever and is now up on his own?"

Ran shook his head sadly. "No, Doctor…not really. He asked for my help to get him ready for the day. I also helped him walk from the bedroom to the office. He is unsteady for the most part. He is also much slower than his usual quick up-and-about pace at best. He was adamant about working on the case. He would not listen to reason or any request."

"Then what is he doing to himself?" Watari stood up, very much in disbelief and angry. "Show me where he is."

A stunned Ran said, "He is in the office, Doctor. You know where—"

"Anthony, please… Just bring me to where he is," said Watari through gritted teeth, doing his best not to shake out his frustration especially since he knew well that Ran or Anthony Crowder had no fault in the matter nor would understand why such a familiar place would not be known to him.

As Watari and Ran walked through long series of hallways inside the vast Reiley Manor, all that Watari could think was, "Stubborn mule, as always. Doesn't matter if he's this highfalutin Lord Reiley or the ever-anal Tatsumi Seiichiro. He can be so stubborn that I want to mangle him! Why do you have to be such an ass when all that you need to do is just rest, Seii? Is that too much to fucking ask?"

Once the two finally reached their destination, Ran knocked on the heavy ornate mahogany door and announced, "Lord Reiley…?"

There was no answer.

Ran knocked once more, this time doing it more loudly.

There was still no answer.

Watari and Ran exchanged worried glances, with Watari being the one to open the door without bothering to knock.

And there was Tatsumi, sitting behind the desk and staring intently on the chalkboard that stood a few feet before him…very much lost in thought.

Ran leaned close to Watari's ear, whispering, "Lord Reiley seems to be back to his old self, as sick as he is. He does seem..."

Sensing Ran's hesitation, Watari asked, "Seem…?"

"—To not be a good mood."

Watari glared at Tatsumi when he dismissively countered, pointing at Tatsumi by using an open palm. "He's always like that. See that? He didn't even bother blinking now that we're here."

"You do not understand, Doctor," explained a tight-lipped Ran, his eyes transfixed on Tatsumi as he felt sorry for his master, the good doctor, and the recent struggle between the two. "Us standing here for a while and Lord Reiley not budging? Being so deep in thought that he did not hear us knock? Not reacting even now that we are in the room and talking about him? Those are all normal when it comes to him. He knows we are here. He hears everything. He definitely looks upset…much more so now than before."

"And what makes you say that?" Watari inquired, his patience wearing thin.

"That quiet scowl of his. It gives me the shivers whenever I see it," was Ran's response, being more tight-lipped than earlier. "My uncle gets that reaction on times when Scotland Yard business brings him here. I see it often as part of the rapport between them, especially since my uncle can be difficult at times. Lord Reiley is mostly composed…genial…. To see that scowl when it is just you and me here in the manor — not normal. Not normal at all."

"Leave us, Anthony," said Watari, letting out a pent-up sigh to let go of the tension that continued building up inside him. "I'll deal with him."

Ran nodded and before he left, Tatsumi said, "Anthony, kindly tell Stewart to prepare the carriage. Please tell him to wait for me downstairs, as usual."

"Yes, of course, Lord Reiley," replied Ran, who then left the room feeling conflicted.

Watari rested his gaze on the sight before him – a tastefully-dressed Tatsumi somewhat drumming the fingers of his right hand on the mahogany desk, still deep in meditative thought despite his illness.

The stunned blonde scientist really did not know what to make of what was now before him, nor how should he react. Before him was his lover, and yet someone else….

The one who sat behind the desk wore a silk burgundy ascot tie cravat neatly secured in a cascade. His cravat complemented well with the white high-collared shirt, double-breasted ivory vest, and the finely- tailored black suit that he wore. The man's white shirt sleeves were secured with gold shirt-studs which bore the Reiley family crest, and a double-Albert chain which secured his gold pocket-watch in front of his vest. He wore black leather gloves, the ring finger of his right hand prominently bearing the sapphire ring which had been passed down as an heirloom from generation to generation of noble gentlemen who assumed the title of Count Reiley. Even though he was under the weather, his face – minus the glasses – was as handsome as ever.

To the left of the desk lay a black top hat, an ivory-handled walking stick leaned against the desk within the man's reach.

"Take a look at what we have here, John. What do you make of it?"

Tatsumi's words, as civil as it had been said, brought Watari out of his reverie. Watari blinked his eyes to fully snap himself back into the reality before him.

"And you are staring at…?" asked Watari, who walked and stood beside Tatsumi. He now looked at the chalkboard that had been the object of Tatsumi's attention, reading the inscriptions:

Ut lux folia

Fenestras animae factus est animatum

Tenebrae distorquet lux veritatis

Quod adversaries, abscondit, et post fenestras animae

Rapidis eos in aeterna flamma usque in anima est, non magis

With his gaze still resting on the chalkboard, Watari "Are we still trying to figure out what it all means?"

Tatsumi's eyes were watering up due to his fever. His head still throbbed while his body ached – all while his mind remained intent of finishing the work before him. He then closed his eyes for a few moments, using his left hand to mostly support his head. While he massaged the left temple of his head with his left thumb, and with eyes remaining closed, he said aloud the verses that were now etched in his memory:

As the light leaves

The windows of the soul become animated

Darkness distorts the light of truth

That opponent hides behind the windows of the soul

Devouring them in eternal flame until the soul is no more

"You figured it out?" said an amazed Watari with a smile. "That's great!"

Letting out a tired sigh, Tatsumi replied, "I knew what it meant since we first saw it last night. I was too drained to finish my train of thought."

"You needed the rest last night. You also need it today and until you get well," Watari sadly explained.

Tatsumi then opened his eyes and rested his back against his comfortable chair, remaining quiet and struggling to maintain a contemplative mindset. "I also finished analyzing those samples I took from last night's crime scene. If I did not know any better, I would say that the tissue samples are not human. It could be animal tissue, but I have never seen anything like it. Would you look at the samples, and give me your opinion? I left my word at the laboratory as usual…just forgive the mess…."

Being mindful of the current situation, Watari carefully addressed Tatsumi by asking, "Are you feeling better, Cliff?"

Still keeping his gaze away from Watari, Tatsumi replied, "Just tired. I will be fine."

Watari let out a soft, yet deep breath to release some of the tension that he had been feeling inside. Despite the chaotic emotions inside him, the most dominant feeling rose to the surface…prompting him to remind the other, "Please take it easy. You're still sick."

"And you are saying all of this because?"

Not appreciating the deadpanned response that he received and trying to keep his temper at bay, Watari said, "I'm concerned about you. You don't seem to care much about your well-being. We need to talk, figure this out together…."

Tatsumi shifted his position, forcing himself to gaze into Watari's eyes. "There is nothing to talk about or figure out. Best to leave it alone."

Those word were the last straw for Watari, and so he commented, "Just spit it out, Cliff – what the hell is wrong with you?"

"Just leave it alone," said Tatsumi with such dismissiveness.

"I'm not going to leave it alone," countered Watari. "We're going to talk about it right now."

"You do not want me to go there," Tatsumi retorted as his gaze became more intent, angry.

"Oh, let's go there," challenged Watari, his eyes narrowing. "I've had it with your asinine, brooding behavior!"

There was a dangerous spark glinting in Tatsumi's azure eyes. "You want what you want when it is convenient for you! Then when what you want is given to you, you retreat! And you want me to 'go there' with you?"

Watari was taken aback. He knew that the one before him was Lord Radcliff Reiley, but he could not shake the fact that the one speaking to him now was indeed Tatsumi Seiichiro.

Fighting back the fever, his anger, the dwindling of his energy, and the tears that now pooled at the corner of his eyes, Tatsumi quietly added, "Fine. You want to talk, so here we are. Tell me what I really am to you, John. This time, no more games."

"Cliff, just tell me what I could do so that we could fix this…."

Tatsumi was expressionless, but one could easily tell the turmoil inside him when he answered, "I told you three words that came from my heart. You had different sets of three-word phrases as your response. My favorite phase? Our relationship …what we are to each other…all completely wrong. You know what is sad? I am asinine because I would still choose to be your fuck-toy all over again…or even repeatedly…if you would only be damn bloody honest about how you feel. At least I would know where I really stand when it comes to you. So, tell me—how can we simply fix this after all that had happened…after all that had been said?"

A speechless Watari frowned and shook his head, feeling as if his head had significantly swollen from what he heard. He then saw Tatsumi slowly stand and gather his top hat, gloves, and cane, all that he could manage to say was, "Cliff…please…"

After wearing his top hat and his gloves, Tatsumi collected his black Inverness cape with his left hand while the right held his cane. He boiled in anger deep inside, mingling and making the hurt he felt as fresh as it was first inflicted upon him…and Watari knew that due to the shadows that followed, flickered, and pooled by Tatsumi's legs and feet.

Seeing the shadows move about, Watari's worry heightened even more. This prompted him to say, "Cliff, you need to stop. We really need to talk. There's something you must know, and you need to sit down and listen."

Stopping for a moment, Tatsumi said as he stared at the wall with his back turned from Watari, "I already know. I have listened enough. Now, if you would excuse me, I have work to do."

"Stop…."

Tatsumi aimed to just gather his things and walk out, not wanting to say anything anymore. As much as his heart ached so much, he did not want to hurt the other. He fully knew that if he gave into the temptation, then he would just end up hurting himself more or regretting what would come out of his mouth. He clasped his walking cane, channeling his anger and hurt in his tightening grip. Self-restraint, however, failed since he could not help but tell Watari, "After many years, we waited for that special moment. We gave each other all that there was to give. You were my first in everything. One shared moment together in an afternoon... Then come nightfall, you told me that everything between us was all completely wrong? What was so deplorable about me that made you decide to tell me… shortly after I have given myself to you… that everything was all complete wrong… That you are giving up on me…on us?"

Watari was transfixed at the spot where he stood, his eyes still staring at Tatsumi as he said, "Wait! Where are you going?"

"Out," deadpanned Tatsumi.

"For once, why don't you listen to fucking reason? Why does everything have to be a pissing contest to you? You are sick – are you going to just keep ignoring that?"

Tatsumi glared at Watari, his body evidently shaking and growing more unsteady. "I need to work. I need to clear my head."

Torn between the revelation before him, his worry about Tatsumi's health, and his anger over Tatsumi's obstinacy, Watari told the other, "You have such a death wish, don't you? You're sick. You need to calm down. You need to hear what I have to say. It's obvious that we need space from each other. I'll do both of us a favor—after we talk, you stay in bed and I leave."

Hearing Watari say the word leave made Tatsumi's ears pound. His emotions were evident since his errand shadows flickered behind him and the dark fog pooling around his feet and legs became thicker. Scowling more dangerously, Tatsumi spat, "I have a couple of three-word phrases, for you. Fuck being sick. No more games. I have work. I go alone. Do I make myself clear?"

Watari was livid, meeting Tatsumi's death glare head-on as he said, "Can't you just swallow your pride and listen to what your body needs?"

"I did more than swallowed my pride. I listened to what my body and heart needed. Look where it brought me…you…us. You may have regrets about what happened between us, but I do not. I never will…even if it means that I do not have any pride left from here on out." Tatsumi could not help but weakly shake his head, adding with sadness laced in his voice, "I cannot picture living a life of lies and regret. At one point in time, so did you…at least for most of the time since we have known each other. I am sorry if being intimate with me brought out the worst in both of us. The good person that I held dearest in my heart…the one that you have mostly been…just vanished overnight because of me. That was my fault. I opened my heart and trusted in us and in what we have. All of this is now ruined because I assumed too many things."

"Cliff…."

The held-back tears beaded at the corner of Tatsumi's eyes as he told Watari, "Love should bring out the best in each other…do you not agree? Then why did it not apply to us? I can only deduce that only one of us feels that way, and not the other."

What else was there for Watari to say?

Doing his best to be gentle, yet unable to contain the hurt and disappointment inside him, Tatsumi stated, "I am tired, John. The innuendos...the jealous fits…opportunities you took to see if I have a jealous bone in my body…the flirtations between us…the sweet nothings exchanged…. Then there are the substantive parts that I will always treasure, as much as it hurts. We cared and loved each other. We went through so much together in all aspects of our lives. You told me earlier to swallow my pride and listen to what my body needs, did you not? I suggest for you to take your own advice, for your sake."

Tatsumi then quietly walked out of his office, closing the door behind him and leaving Watari to mull over what had been said between them. The latter saw Tatsumi's shadows moving by their master's feet, feeding on volatile and raw wounded emotions and ready to lash at any moment.

A still-shocked Watari walked to the window, looking at Ran assisting Tatsumi in the horse-drawn carriage and bidding the manor's master goodbye. He closed his eyes, tears streaming down his cheek now that no one was looking, thinking, "Just who was I really talking to just now, Seii…was that Lord Reiley, or was that you?"

Watari then took in a deep breath, doing his best to compose himself. There was a deeper problem at hand – Tatsumi's shadows coupled with Tatsumi's conflicted and volatile emotions that were now unchecked now that Tatsumi had lost his identity as the Secretary of EnmaCho, shinigami, and kagetsukai. It was a recipe for disaster not just for anyone, but most especially to Tatsumi himself.

Once the barouche eventually reached its near-two-hour destination and stopped, the carriage-man got off his station and assisted his lone passenger.

"Thank you, Stewart," said Tatsumi with a gracious smile. "I will secure a hansom as my way home. I do not foresee being detained too long, so I would be home in time for a late lunch or an early supper."

"Very well, my lord. I would inform Anthony and the staff of your return," replied Stewart, nodding his head a bit as a form of reverence for the one who stood before him.

Tatsumi walked down the alleyway of the last crime scene, stopping by to ask a group of departing bobbies regarding where Kowabara – or Chief Inspector Crowder – was.

One of the bobbies replied, "We are just about done here, Lord Reiley. The Chief Inspector is waiting for you… at the spot where the body was found."

Touching the tip of his top hat and giving the bobbies a nod, Tatsumi then turned to walk towards the murder scene. He took his time on his approach, putting up a valiant fight against the unsteadiness of his gait and his quickly-draining physical strength. He stopped for a minute, taking out his handkerchief and patting the sweat that beaded his forehead.

Within view was the person Tatsumi wished to see, waving his hand.

Tatsumi quickened his pace "You telegrammed, Chief Inspector Crowder. You said that your men found something of interest in the case?"

Crowder pointed at the wall opposite from the wall that Tatsumi, Watari, and Ran had worked on last night which bore the cryptic message. "We saw that while we were wrapping up last night. We could not believe that we missed something so significant."

"I believe it. The Yard did not miss it at all, as bare minimal as your efforts could be on crucial matters and most especially during crucial times…but this was not here last night – John, Anthony, and I most especially know that…made sure of that," thought Tatsumi as he examined the symbol drawn on the wall before them.

The two men were now looking at a drawing scrawled in blood – two circles, a larger one enclosing a smaller one. The directions of north, south, east, and west were marked in the appropriate spots. Within the smaller circle was a figure that had circles, squares, lines, arrowheads, and certain geometric shapes that when formed together seemed to be a representation of the head of a menacing crowned figure looking back at them.

Tatsumi could not help but walk closer to the wall, confirming that blood was indeed used to draw the large picture that now covered the wall. He stepped back a few feet, with Crowder standing a few feet behind him.

"You have seen such ghastliness before in many of your cases, have you not, Count Reiley? What do you make of this?"

Without turning to face the person who he was conversing with, Tatsumi replied as his eyes continued to rest on the wall, "Definitely occult…ritualistic. This is the first time, though, that The Gouger became blatantly bold. I am considering this as an escalation of some sorts…an announcement…of bigger things to come…."

"What is that, actually?"

Tatsumi's response to Crowder was, "It is a sigil. Conjurers use it to summon angels and demons, have them do their bidding."

Crowder scoffed the idea, muttering, "Demon worship? Who would believe in such poppycock at this day and age?"

Taking in a deep breath, Tatsumi said, "It is not hard to imagine that. I can point many parts of history that document practices pertaining to the supernatural, demonic, the occult. Just take for example the great worldwide interest in spiritualism. I am sure many members of the upper class would not appreciate your deprecating comment. We cannot rule out any possibility, especially since we are catching a serial murderer. You would be surprised at what extent one would go to get what he or she wants, Crowder."

The two men were quiet for a few minutes. The one behind Tatsumi broke the ice of silence and uttered, "Humans will go through great lengths. I wholeheartedly agree with you on that, kagetsukai…."

Tatsumi's eyes narrowed and his forehead crinkled, feeling alarmed as he calmly asked, "What did you call me again?"

When Tatsumi turned to face Crowder, he saw a seven-foot silhouette made from red mist and an unconscious Crowder lying on the ground before its feet.

Tatsumi's eyes went wide. Fright clenched his heart and a chill traveled down his spine. "Crowder!"

"I am still hungry and have not yet had my promised feast. The purest of souls lies in wait…but I did not realize that I have another boon. A dark soul such as yours would prove as valuable…if not more. Weak enough now for me to enter…and when you recover, strong enough to house the power that I have and meld along with yours. Your immortal body and soul are worthy gifts –perfect for a king such as me."

A split second later, the red mist rushed towards Tatsumi and everything went as black as night.

End of Chapter Seventeen