A/N: Short, dreadful chapter filled with indecision, strange dreams and regret. These will all make sense down the road. I know where I want to go, I'm still trying to get there.
Thank you for the Kind words!
Even though, she had decided as she left Cedric's workshop that she wasn't going to drink the sleeping draught he had given her, by the time she was actually ready to sleep, the indecision that had so plagued her of late had returned. Perhaps she should drink it? After all, Cedric had her best interests at heart, didn't he? Of course he did! Why wouldn't he? He was her mentor, her friend, he cared about her. She knew all this. Why then was she questioning it?
She wasn't sure. It was something about the way he looked at her when he handed her the potion. It was as if he were trying to hide something. She vaguely remembered seeing that look in his eyes, in her first years at the castle, but had never really thought much of it. Now she couldn't help but worry. "Is thy lover false? Is thy lover true?" the blackbird in her dream had sung. What could that have meant? Cedric, was most assuredly not her lover. Well, not yet. She blushed at the thought. Maybe he never would be, but she didn't think that's what the bird had meant. She pondered it. Could it have meant the one she loved had a false heart? Perhaps, but she couldn't quite bring herself to believe that was true. No, not when he had held her as she cried, and not when he did all the little things, that endeared him to her. She had never doubted him before. Why now?
She looked at the bottle. She should drink it. She hated letting anyone down, especially those she looked up to and truly, she looked up to Cedric. He had promised her that it would help. "Help Whom?" asked that doubting voice deep inside her. She should drink it, but she couldn't.
She sighed. "I'm sorry Cedric." She whispered as she put the bottle of potion in a drawer for safekeeping. After all, there may come a time when she would need it. Now was just not that time.
She grabbed her cup of Mugwort tea and the book of dreams. If her theory was correct, she and her beloved Sorcerer were sharing the same dreams. If such a thing were possible. She consulted the book. And read about shared dreaming. Perhaps, they were sharing the same feelings after all and this was a product of their subconscious. She didn't know, but the prospect of seeing that he dreamt of her like she dreamt of him was too tantalizing an idea to pass up. If they were, in fact, having the same dreams, then she could tell him how she felt. She wasn't sure if when he awoke he remembered, or if he knew she was dreaming about him, but she thought back to their interactions as of late and that seemed very plausible. She needed to find him. Tonight. In her dreams. She finished the tea and felt sleep come upon her and closed her eyes to the darkness as she felt her body begin to fall forward...
She was in the field again, standing against the trunk of the tree. It was still cold there, but the feeling of emptiness was gone. She could tell she wasn't alone. Although she couldn't see him, she could feel his presence nearby. "Cedric," she said softly. "I know you're here." she heard him sigh and then speak: "You're not supposed to be."
"Why?"
"You know perfectly well, why." she followed his voice, it led to the other side of the tree.
"Are you angry with me?" she said as she made her way around it to him.
"I should be." she was soon standing right behind him. he was leaning against the trunk of the tree, his arms crossed and his expression one of irritation as he gazed out over the empty field. She gently laid her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his chest. He tensed.
"Please don't be. I just want to see you. I'm happy here." she whispered. He sighed, but then took her in his arms, holding her tight. She joined him in looking out at the empty field.
"Is this real? Are you really here with me?" she asked.
"How can it be? It's just a dream." was the low reply, but he continued to hold her as if his life depended upon it.
The pair stood like that for the longest time, gazing at an empty grey sky and the long grass that gently swayed in the wind.. She was content to have him hold her in silence, but she could sense that something was troubling him.
"Are you alright?" he shook his head.
"What's the matter?"
"You shouldn't be here." he repeated.
"Do you want me gone?" again he shook his head.
"What do you want, Cedric?" she asked gently.
He pulled away from her resting his face in his hands.
"I don't know." he muttered. He lowered his hands and looked up at her. He was upset. The look he gave her was so full of pain and turmoil and confusion, that she felt her heart break.
Slowly, the girl reached out with a trembling hand and cupped his face.
"I love you." she breathed.
His eyes lit up for a moment, and he made a movement as if to reach out to her.
"Do you love me too?" her voice was hopeful.
He backed away as if the words and her touch had burned him. His eyes met hers for a moment before falling to her neck and then they grew dark.
"What have you done to me?!" he hissed and before she could react he had vanished.
And she was left alone,'neath the tree to weep bitter tears as a blackbird sang in the distance.
She woke up to tears streaming down her face. Her mind was reeling. Her body felt so cold. He had been holding her, hadn't he? It had been so warm. She'd felt so safe, but then he was gone. That look he had given her, it was so full of fear, and confusion, and pain, but then there had been a light of hope when she said she loved him. What had that meant? And why had he been so frightened? "What have you done to me?!" he'd said. The words haunted her.
She felt ill. "What have I done?" she murmured. She hurried to where the sleeping draught was and took a swig and then she lay back down. She didn't want to dream anymore. She was afraid to face him tomorrow. She continued to sob as she waited for the dreamless sleep to come upon her, regretting that she hadn't done this to begin with. "I'm so sorry, cedric." she murmured over and over between her sobs, waiting until darkness fell upon her once more.