Chapter 3: Historical Re-enactment

ELENA

I pause partway up the stairs from the basement. It smells just a touch musty because it's a basement and I don't care how rich you are or how many de-humidifying devices Damon's mounted on the ceiling, you can't change that. But it also smells like almond-scented wood polish and ancient stone and just a hint of copper and ice from the freezer full of blood bags I just visited.

From my position on the third stair I can hear the expanse of empty house, weighty and contented above my head, and the sound of people arguing from the kitchen. Stefan's calm, placating tone, the jittery clicking of Caroline's heels as she paces, and the high-pitched drone of her soliloquy.

I smile in spite of myself. Damon and I have been gone for a week, touring colleges with Jeremy, and it's good to be home.

I head for the kitchen to heat up my snack. Cold blood still sends me blurring for the bathroom, even though Damon says I'll eventually get used to it, so it is worth jumping into the middle of Caroline's latest drama to have the use of the microwave. Besides, Stefan'll have her calmed down in another five minutes, tops, and her voice is only mid-range shrill which means that Damon isn't there to get her all stirred up again.

"I just don't understand how Mr. Fultz can think that keeping his stanky old cow pasture is more important than giving children a safe place to play. They were playing basketball in the street, Stefan. They need a park. So anyway, I called Nicole, because her cousin sells him hay, to see if she could talk to her cousin to get him to talk to Mr. Fultz, but she didn't want to do it!" Caroline makes a frustrated noise. "It's like nobody has a sense of community pride anymore."

"Why can't we just offer him more money?" Stefan asks. "He can buy more pasture somewhere else. He's a businessman, I'm sure it's just a matter of dollars and cents."

"Because it's the city's money, Stefan, not ours." Her voice softens. "And you already help with all my fundraisers."

"So? If I ever did one, you'd help," Stefan says.

"That's different. You can't be financing every one of my projects or we'll be broke in a year."

"Why not?" I give Stefan a sympathetic look as I head for the cupboard that holds the coffee mugs. "You let Damon buy you an orphanage."

"He did not buy me an orphanage, Elena. He graciously donated a year's operating expenses so they could get on their feet to do their own fundraising, which they are doing. And I was teaching him a lesson."

"The value of gambling?" I raise an eyebrow. "I'm not sure I like the values you're instilling in my boyfriend."

"It was a fair bet and he should have known he would lose," Caroline says.

"Well, why don't we make a new bet?" Stefan asks. "I bet that when he gets back, he kisses Elena within the first two minutes of getting into the house. If I'm right, you have to let me buy that pasture and donate it to the city."

She glares at him. "That's totally cheating."

"Yeah, give it up, Stefan." Damon saunters into the kitchen.

I roll my eyes at him, because I know how much trouble he goes to in order to sneak up on us and make it look effortless. Just once I want to be able to surprise him and make him feel like an ass for wasting thirty minutes tiptoeing down a hallway. Just once.

"Just let Storm do what she does best. My money's on less than 36 hours before she gets her greedy little hands on her prize plot of Cowshit Central." He gives me a sexy little eye flare. "Hello gorgeous." He crosses his arms over his chest. "I'm still trying to decide who I want to win this little bet."

I smile and drop my eyes to the buckle of his belt. "I think it would be funny if Stefan had to buy a cow pasture."

"Very funny," Damon agrees seriously as he crosses the kitchen and takes my face in his hands. I smile against his lips because I know this is going to make Caroline lecture the heck out of us. But as soon as his lips touch mine, I forget all about revenge and focus my attention on his talented tongue instead.

When he pulls away, I smile up into his crystal blue eyes. "Missed you this morning."

"Uh-huh," he agrees, his thumb tracing the edge of my lower lip. I become aware of a rhythmic drumming sound.

"I'm pretty sure I owe you two cow pastures now," Stefan says. I identify the sound as Caroline's manicured nails tapping impatiently on the counter.

"Just tell me when they're done so I can open my eyes."

"Why do I have to be the voyeur?" Stefan sighs.

Damon steals one more kiss and walks across the kitchen to start the microwave. I frown. "What are you doing?"

"Re-heating the blood you forgot in there." He tosses me a cocky smile.

"I told you to stop it with the snarky little nicknames," Stefan tells his brother, picking up the conversation as if it never paused.

"No way! That was from the X-men." Caroline narrows her eyes at Damon. "I kind of like it."

"Storm?" Stefan says, puzzled.

"She controls the weather," I explain. "Kind of like how Caroline could get a volcano to grow in the middle of Mystic Falls if that's what she wanted it to do."

"And make it erupt pink French poodles, to match the color scheme," Damon says.

Stefan frowns at his fiancé. "Don't get any ideas for the wedding."

"Being one of the X-men would be way cool," she says, ignoring him. "Way more fun than being a vampire."

"Yeah, psychic powers and electrical storms and being able to look like someone else whenever you wanted," I say. "So much better than tearing out throats."

"And then there's the eye candy."

"Wolverine," we sigh in near-perfect unison.

Stefan's brows snap down.

Damon sneers. "You can't tell me you would take some mountain man with overgrown fingernails over a sleekly muscular, urbanely handsome vampire."

Caroline and I share a look.

"They would." Stefan crosses his arms.

"You're both lovely," I say.

"But Hugh Jackman…" Caroline groans.

"Hugh Jackman is not sexier than we are," Damon says.

I shoot an apologetic look at Damon. "Honey, you're beautiful. But those muscles…"

"It's that scene," Caroline says.

"The one where he jumps naked over the waterfall. Definitely." Caroline, Bonnie and I must have replayed that scene fifteen times.

"We don't have to put up with this, do we?" Stefan asks his brother.

"Nope." Damon pulls out his phone. "Only one thing to do."

"See if you can get the red-eye. Those are always cheaper," Stefan suggests.

"Wait, what are you going to do?" Caroline asks.

"Eat him," Damon answers. "Obviously."

# # #

"Caroline, seriously, how do you not remember the spot where my boyfriend rescued you from a crazed werewolf?"

"I was kinda freaking out, okay?" Caroline studies the nearby trees. "I still don't understand why they thought it would be fun to send us on a scavenger hunt of places we've nearly died."

"They're guys, Caroline. But yeah, I would have much rather gone on a hunt of all the places we've had sex in the woods."

She giggles. "That would have taken all day and then we'd never get the big prize."

"How good can it be?" I fold the papers holding clues we've already solved and shoving them into my pocket. "I'm not going to get the prize I want with you here."

Caroline sighs. "Whatever, Elena. You get to see Damon naked like every day. It's not that much of a prize."

"Did you kill a vampire hunter you didn't tell me about?" I shoot her an incredulous look. "Because you're acting crazy."

"Damon's the one acting crazy. He's not caving and I have hinted and wheedled in every way I can think of, which, trust me." She gives me a serious look. "That's a lot of ways. I don't believe for a second he's not interested in marrying you. Not that I think he cares about weddings or papers or whatever, but it's you. I can't believe he'd pass up a single opportunity to stake his claim on you."

"He thinks he's very stubborn and manly for not proposing yet."

"Hmm… How many pieces of jewelry has he gotten you since I got engaged?"

I silently hold up three fingers and she smiles.

"That boy does guilt so beautifully."

I nod in agreement, my fingers going automatically to my new fire opal necklace. He could get me jewelry made of rubber bands and pencils and I'd love it. There's just something comforting about wearing something he picked out because he thought I would like it.

"You have told him you'd say yes, right?" Caroline gives up on any pretense of looking for our next clue.

I raise my eyebrows at her in amusement. "Um, I'm not the expert here, but I'm pretty sure you're supposed to wait until they ask."

Caroline rolls her eyes. "They're men, Elena."

"That's what I was hoping."

"I mean, they're big fraidy cats. They're not going to ask unless they are sure, absolutely 100% certain you'll say yes and even then…" She smiles, her eyes sparkling. "They get all cute and nervous. Stefan stuttered through the whole thing and he must have licked his lips like 20 times. I was getting ready to offer to do it for him."

I brace myself to hear their engagement story again. And then he got down on one knee and I almost told him not to, because it was right in the street and all dirty and stuff but then I thought, hey, I'm only getting one proposal and it's worth at least one ruined pair of slacks.

But instead she surprises me. "Anyway, you need to tell him you'd say yes. I know he's normally good with hints and all, but for this…" She hesitates.

I hold back a smile. "What?" She doesn't know he's already all but proposed and I'm definitely not going to tell her.

She takes a step closer and lowers her voice. "It's Damon, Elena. And I know he has the biggest ego of any male ever born but when it comes to you, sometimes he's like…I don't know. I just think maybe he needs a little extra reassurance and it wouldn't hurt if you were really clear with him."

"Trust me, Caroline. Damon Salvatore doesn't have a doubt in his mind about how I feel about him and neither does anybody else."

She raises a sculpted eyebrow in silent challenge, and I suddenly realize that I didn't tell him yes, not really. Not in so many words. But he knows. Doesn't he?

"That tree!" Caroline's eyes focus on something over my shoulder. "That's it, for sure this time."

"About time." I dig around until I find a small piece of paper in a hollow in the roots of the tree. "Text for further instructions," I read aloud.

Caroline pulls out her phone and zaps off a text to both Salvatores. It only takes a few seconds to get a reply.

"Head for the namesake of the vortex of all evil," she reads. "What the heck is that supposed to mean?"

"No problem." I lead the way east.

When we arrive at the base of Mystic Falls, I start peeking under bushes and overturning rocks. "They could have put a bow on it, whatever it was. That would have been a lot easier."

"Um, Elena? I think you may have gotten your wish about the prize."

I follow her gaze to the top of the waterfall and my jaw drops open at the sight of two naked Salvatores waving back at us. They share a glance and then they jump, their pale, muscular bodies outlined clearly against the water as they fall the hundred or so feet to the pool below.

When they hit the water, it throws up a wave that peppers Caroline and me with cold water droplets, but we don't budge.

"Can we get that again in slow motion?" Caroline asks, awed.

"Like twice a day?" I swallow.

Damon pops up first and shakes his head, shining droplets leaping free of his inky hair. "Hi honey."

Just then, Stefan surfaces and dunks his brother and we have to wait for them to stop roughhousing before they wade out of the water, the slow reveal of nude male bodies glistening with water enough to make my mouth dry as dust.

Caroline's eyes are glued to Stefan, but I have to admit that I'm enjoying the full spectrum of available view.

"Damn. Fine. Genes," I murmur to Caroline, who nods wordlessly.

"Better than a hairy Aussie?" Damon says.

Caroline coughs and tries to regain the upper hand. "I can't believe you guys just got naked together."

Stefan and Damon share a scornful glance. "Nobody used to wear bathing suits, Caroline," Stefan says.

"Because they were a fucking stupid idea. I mean, why wear clothes you intend to get wet just so you have to dry them out again?"

"Why, did we embarrass you?" Stefan says.

Damon opens his arms and goes after Caroline, gloriously naked. "How about a hug for your favorite brother-in-law?"

"Elena!" She takes off at full speed. I leap at Damon before he can follow, wrapping my legs around his waist.

He stops dead, his arms going automatically around my waist as he gives me a pleased smile. "Well, good morning to you, too." He steals a kiss. "That was a serious mistake, Ms. Gilbert."

"Does this feel wrong to you?" I tighten my legs around him.

"Surrendering yourself to my evil clutches?" He shakes his head. "Can only result in one thing."

I perk up. "Yeah?"

He bends his knees and with one powerful jump we're both airborne for a moment before we crash into the frigid water at the base of the falls.

I come up sputtering and glaring. "Didn't anybody ever tell you that vampires hate to swim?"

He nods his head toward the side of the pool and I notice that we're alone. "Little brother finally figured out how to tell when a girl wants to be chased."

He gives me a wicked grin, but I hesitate when he leans in to kiss me.

"Damon, the other day, in your bathtub–"

"Oh, it was my pleasure, I assure you."

I giggle. "Not that day. The one when I was crying and you were trying to cheer me up. I just realized I never really said that my answer was yes."

"Somebody's trying to wheedle her way back into that little box." Damon smothers a smile. "Patience is a virtue, Elena."

I pinch him under the cover of the water and he pouts adorably. "I meant that I love you, you jerk."

"Oh, well, when you put it like that," he says, his eyes sparkling, "you're pretty hard to resist."

I groan and try to push him away, but he just cuddles me closer, undeterred by my struggles. "Never mind."

"Hey," he says, his voice low.

I peek up at him, watching his eyes darken the way they always do when he's feeling possessive.

"I love you, too."

His voice is rough, but there's not a hint of nervousness in it. Caroline's wrong: Damon knows me better than anyone. And so he knows exactly what I can't live without.

I smile. "I hear people used to think it was silly to wear clothes while you were swimming."

Damon smiles back, his expression warming me despite the temperature of the water. "Very silly." He helps me pull my shirt over my head.

"You up for a historical re-enactment?"

"Am I ever."