Disclaimer I do not own Harry Potter.
Hermione was seated in a comfy armchair directly across from the Headmaster in his office.
"Miss Granger, would care to explain why Professor Snape is unconscious in the hospital wing?," Dumbledore asked in a disapproving tone.
"Um, actually Professor, I don't want to explain," Hermione said stubbornly
"What you want Miss Granger is irreverent, so you are going to tell me exactly why I have a unconscious member of staff in the Hospital Wing," Dumbledore told her with a frown.
"Fine, but it's not that much of an exciting tale," Hermione said.
"I was in detention with Snape for writing to Lucius Malfoy, asking if Snape and he were lovers incident. I had brought Snape a present to apologize for my actions at dinner. I think me trying to bite him really upset him.
"Anyway, I got my present out of my bag and gave it to him, but he refused to accept it, saying it was some kind of trick. To prove it wasn't, I opened the gift, but Snape still wouldn't accept my harmless gift.
"Well, feeling very insulted by his refusal to accept my gift, I called him a goat-vomit brain with troll snot breath, which lead to him calling me an annoying little twerp. We insulted each other for several minutes.
"Then Snape looked at my hair clip and thought it was a moth and fainted. I found out tonight that Snape is petrified of them.
"So, I drew a mustache and a bear on his face, searched his pockets for money, then I went to get him medical assistance.
"And that's what happened, sir," Hermione said grinning.
"I see... I must ask you to keep Professor Snape's fear of moths a secret, Miss Granger, Dumbledore said, unwrapping a lemon drop.
"Of course Headmaster, I won't tell anyone," Hermione lied. As soon as she got back to the Gryffiondor Common Room, she was going to tell everyone.
A massive thank you to my reviewers!