The main reason he always hated trekking out in the middle of nowhere, besides the bugs and the leaves and the being miles away from anything useful, was that it was too damn quiet.

It was too easy, thought Yusuke, to let the thoughts that were normally shoved down as deeply as they would go come back to the surface and tap you on the shoulder and make you listen. Not so in a busy bar; you could tune out and let the background noise take the place of anything that wasn't a fleeting surface thought. He sipped at his beer, listening to the hum and bustle of the weekend crowd, the dim tones of whatever sport was on the screen at the other end of the bar, the incessant rambling of Kuwabara next to him telling him about his new life at university and how different the schoolwork was and the weekend visits to see his sister and Yukina and the sudden shouts of "Urameshi! Yo! Earth to Urameshi!"

Well that wasn't part of the normal bar bustle. Yusuke took another sip and looked at Kuwabara. "Yeah, what? I'm listening."

"Like hell you are," grunted Kuwabara into his own beer. "You're a million miles away. What's on your mind?"

Yusuke looked at Kuwabara contemplatively; the other's expression was serious, more than a little concerned that Yusuke might not be okay. It wasn't very often, after all, that he actually stopped and thought about something, or at least not in a manner that others could tell. It couldn't hurt to share what was going on, right? Kuwabara was always going on about how real men weren't afraid of their feelings, and being Yusuke's closest friend, surely he wasn't going to be judgemental about the situation.

Yusuke took a deep breath. "I fucked Kurama the last time we went to Makai."

There was a beat as Kuwabara processed the statement and tried to discern if Yusuke meant figuratively or literally, followed by an exceptionally loud shriek of "You WHAT?"

So friggin' much for not judging. Half the bar had turned to look when Kuwabara's yell rang out, and even knowing they had no idea what was going on, the stares were uncomfortable. Yusuke slammed back the rest of his beer, slapped some money on the counter, and left the bar in a huff. Kuwabara chugged his beer and fumbled for his own money before scrambling after him. "Urameshi, wait up!" Kuwabara jogged after him and put a hand on his shoulder when he had caught up. "Urameshi - "

Yusuke jerked away from the touch, stuffing his hands in his pockets and hunching his shoulders defensively. "Forget it," he said sourly. "Just pretend I didn't say anything. S'fine."

"Hey man, I'm sorry," said Kuwabara pleadingly. "You just...caught me off guard, that's all. I mean, you've only ever been interested in g - well, in Keiko, pretty much," he amended halfway through his statement. "I just assumed..."

"Yeah, well. You know what they say about assuming, and god knows you're already a big enough ass." Kuwabara ignored the barb. Yusuke reached into his jacket pocket for the cigarette he had bummed off Shizuru last month for emergencies, then swore under his breath when he remembered it was on his nightstand at home. When he changed direction to head for the nearest convenience store, Kuwabara followed. Apparently, he still wanted to hear about it.

Yusuke snuck a glance at his friend's expression, but didn't say anything more until they were outside the store and Yusuke was leaning against a wall to light his cigarette. "I dunno, it just happened," he said after savoring the first drag. "We fought some bandits, sat down to catch our breath, then we were fucking." He scoffed when Kuwabara winced. "What, would you prefer I called it making love?" he snipped. "Because it was a little rough for that. I've still got damn marks all over me." He pushed his collar over for Kuwabara to see the bite marks where Kurama had gotten particularly zealous on Yusuke's shoulder.

"So...what's bothering you about it?" asked Kuwabara with some trepidation. "He not returning your calls or something?"

Yusuke snorted and pushed away from the wall, heading for his apartment. Kuwabara tagged along even though his place was in the opposite direction. "Nothing's bothering me about it. It's fine, okay?" He knew Kuwabara knew that was a lie. But Kuwabara didn't push further, and Yusuke let him change the subject, finding an odd comfort in Kuwabara's chatter until he bid him good night and turned onto the main street to begin his own trek home.

For the rest of the week Yusuke threw himself into his work, putting his entire focus on the customers that came to his ramen stand and pushing all the complicated feelings away to deal with later (or maybe never). But by Friday he found himself in a jittery mood. He kept his cart within walking distance of the office building where Kurama had started working after high school, and every Friday, when Yusuke opened earlier than usual to cater to the businessmen in the area looking for a change of pace, the fox would come to him for his own lunch. He had ordered the same bowl so often that Yusuke would prepare it ahead of time, sliding it in front of Kurama with a triumphant grin just as Kurama took his seat. This time, however, Yusuke hesitated before beginning his preparations. What if Kurama didn't come by today? What if he did?

He made the ramen anyway, but when the clock ticked over to the usual time, Kurama wasn't there. Ten minutes went by with no redhead in sight. By an hour later, Yusuke gave up expecting him and spent the rest of the evening in such a sour mood that even his regular customers didn't stay to chat. He decided to close early, suddenly feeling desperate for a night of drinks and shitty television on his couch. He pulled the shutters down just as a gentle rain began falling, then turned to finish the last of his cleaning, slamming pots and pans around even harder now that there were no customers or passers-by to give him odd looks over his temper.

"I can't imagine that sort of treatment is good for the cookware."

Yusuke almost dropped the bowl he had just picked up and swore under his breath. Kurama was leaning against the counter near the door that Yusuke was certain had been locked from the inside and that he definitely hadn't heard open or shut. The look on his face was half amused, half apologetic, and it was the apologetic part that made the anger that had coursed through Yusuke's veins at the sight of him dissipate as quickly as it had come. "You didn't come by for lunch," slipped out in place of the casual greeting he had intended. "I mean, not that you have to or anything," he said lamely, turning back to his task.

"I'm sorry." Kurama was behind him now. "There was an issue with a client and I had to work through lunch."

The floral, woodsy scent that always clung to Kurama pushed through the oily and somewhat smoky scent of the cart. Yusuke contemplated turning around and pulling Kurama even closer by his tie, but opted to shrug offhandedly instead. "It's not a problem," he said, trying to keep his voice light and his focus on the dishes ahead of him.

Kurama read every inch of tension in Yusuke's body with ease and sighed. "Yusuke." When the only answer was a slight tilt of the head to indicate that he was listening, Kurama slipped his arms around the Mazoku's waist to reach for a bucket, smirking at the startled jump his movement elicited. "Let me make it up to you," he murmured against Yusuke's ear.

Yusuke felt lightheaded, staring at Kurama's hands moving around him to fill the bucket with warm water and dunk a clean cloth into it. Somehow he didn't think Kurama meant that he wanted to help him with the cleanup of the stall, but when Kurama put the bucket aside to press Yusuke's back against the wall and kiss him senseless, suddenly it didn't matter. He fought the urge to whine when Kurama broke the kiss. "Kurama?"

Kurama smiled at him with a half-lidded gaze. "Let me help you clean up," he said softly. "You look like you've had a long day." He took the cloth from the water and began wiping Yusuke's hands with tenderness, rubbing away the sweat and grime of the day. When he moved up Yusuke's arm, he pressed a kiss to his palm, then to his lips while he re-wet the cloth and wiped his face and neck.

The warmth was soothing and Yusuke closed his eyes to enjoy Kurama's ministrations, only to open them again when Kurama knelt on the floor before him with the bucket and unbuttoned Yusuke's jeans, tugging them down around his knees.

Yusuke let his legs give out from under him, sliding down into Kurama's arms and resting his face on the redhead's shoulder. "Fuck," he whispered. "That was - "

"A satisfactory apology?" asked Kurama, causing Yusuke to snort and his body to shake with silent laughter. He smiled and tightened his hold on Yusuke, pressing his cheek into the other's hair.

Distant thunder rumbled through the air, and Yusuke pulled back reluctantly. "Kurama, I..." Trepidation filled his eyes, and Kurama's chest tightened at the knowledge that he was the cause of the total disappearance of Yusuke's constant confidence. What are we? was what he wanted to ask. "What about Hiei?" he deflected instead.

A shadow passed over Kurama's face that made Yusuke uncomfortable. "Hiei and I...have different ideas about what we want out of our lives," he said consideringly. "He can't bring himself to live amongst humans long-term, and traveling back and forth to Makai so frequently was not conducive to the type of relationship either of us sought." His eyes searched for something in Yusuke's, though he was certain he knew the answer to his own question before he asked it. "What about Keiko?"

"Well, um...ditto, sort of?" Kurama raised an eyebrow at him, wordlessly requesting further clarification. "I guess we just have different ideas about what exactly a 'normal life' is. She gets all funny whenever I say I'm going to Makai. I think she wants me to pretty much ignore that part of me until she gets old and dies or something, so we decided to go our separate ways."

Kurama suspected that Yusuke was oversimplifying, but he didn't press further. He pressed a kiss to Yusuke's lips instead, enjoying the feeling of Yusuke's entire body softening against him instantly, then stood and helped Yusuke to his feet. "Come on, I'll help you actually clean up this time," he said with a laugh while Yusuke adjusted his jeans. The work went quickly between the two of them, and even though walking underneath their own umbrellas until they parted ways forced them to keep their distance, Yusuke felt as close to Kurama as if they had been walking hand in hand.