The Legends Still Live On
Bogen Acht: Unternehmen Diät!
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"On this day in history, I declare the Ooarai Fitness Club to have been founded!" Anton proclaimed.
"Hooah!" all but two members chanted in agreement. The members of said club were Anton, Zitrus, Dexter, Gustav, Saori, Yuzu, Piyotan, and Oryou. The last two did not chant in agreement.
All of the guys wore black gym shorts for the time while the girls wore their own fitness clothes. The girls had on some black shorts that were more form fitting along with black tank tops that exposed their midriffs, also form fitting.
All of the guys then stood before the girls, and Anton started walking back and forth in front of the girls. "Are you girls scared of scales?!" he barked out in a manner much like an American drill sergeant.
"Yeah!" both Saori and Yuzu replied as they raised their fists.
"Yeah…" Piyotan and Oryou lazily replied as they half-heartedly raised their fists.
"And you love your snacks, don't ya?!"
"Yeah!" Saori and Yuzu replied the same way as before.
"Yeah…" Piyotan and Oryou lazily replied.
"Well it's high time we solve that little conundrum of yours!" Anton announced as he came to a stop. He then spread his arms behind him as a gesture to the other guys with him. "All four of us are here to help you however possible with achieving this goal you've set for yourselves!"
"I've been a bit negligent lately…" Yuzu revealed.
"Oh, this is going to save me!" Saori dreamily stated.
"I just got dragged along for the ride," Piyotan said. "I'm not really…"
"I don't really care, either…" Oryou opined.
"Oh, really?!" Anton questioned as he came over to Oryou and Piyotan. "Stiffen those abs!" he barked at them.
Piyotan and Oryou didn't look enthusiastic, but they obeyed, for they knew Anton wouldn't take no for an answer. Anton then lightly tapped both their abs with one of his fists.
"You call those abs?!" he barked in wonder. "Those are the softest bellies I have ever had the pleasure of feeling, even taking into account that I can only go off of Bubi's word for the feelings!" He then turned back and headed for the other guys before facing the girls again. "Well it's a good thing I've got the kitchen sink lined up for you all first! It's high time you started getting into shape!"
And so begins a dated record of some worrying girls being forced by some of their friends to swallow their fears and actually make progress toward their goals.
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"And today, we will start with joining in the training routines of the former Badminton and Volleyball Clubs!" Anton announced as he and the others of the Fitness Club stood before the Volleyball and Badminton clubs.
"No problem!" Ron granted as he and Noriko greeted them with enthusiasm. Ron had his racquet in hand while Noriko had a volleyball with her. "And feel free to join either of our clubs anytime!"
"We'll pass on that part," Anton replied to the second statement.
And so the guys and girls underwent the training regiments of both of the sports groups. Their training regiments were actually vastly similar considering both sports were played somewhat similarly.
One of the first things done was having everyone try to receive the ace serves from Noriko and Ron. The guys all had racquets for trying to return Ron's badminton serves, while the girls focused more on trying to return Noriko's volleyball serves. While it was difficult and taxing, all of the guys were able to return Ron's serves. The girls were not so well off. Only Saori and Yuzu could try returning Noriko's serves. Piyotan and Oryou had already given up after a few serves.
Next up came some extreme conditioning of both clubs. Such conditioning included balancing a volleyball on the head while kneeled to the ground with hands behind the back. The guys had it even harder, considering they had to try balancing a racquet from the handle end on their big toe while laying down with their legs extended upward to the sky.
Another part of the conditioning included hanging from a pull-up bar by the legs with a cup. There was a bucket of water on the ground, and the cup had to be used to get the water up to another bucket hanging above the pull-up bar. The only way to do it was by using the abs to sit up.
Also part of said conditioning was hanging upside down by the feet from the ceiling. For the guys, it was taken even farther, and they had to also hit shuttlecocks being tossed to them by Ron with their racquets.
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Later, all of the girls were bruised and beat from the training. The guys were also tired, but they could go for more if needed.
"Now I know why both of them lack club members…" Oryou commented as the girls all sat on the ground.
"You're right…" Yuzu and Saori agreed.
"Come on, you girls can't be tired already!" Anton said to the girls as the guys stood before them. He then pulled out his phone to check the time. "Oh, fine, I guess you can have a break. But we've got more to do, so don't think this is the end!" Anton ended as he put up his phone and granted the girls to have a break.
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Later on, the girls were fully recovered, and along with them now were Akebi and Harry, the sports clubs' most aerobic people. Both were now in the same outfits as the Fitness Club members.
"Oh, was the normal training too harsh for you all?" Harry asked. "What do you say to some aerobics instead?" he suggested as he and Akebi performed a short aerobics demo.
"Aerobics sounds great!" Saori answered.
"Let's do that," Yuzu agreed.
"That sounds like something good. Let's do it!" Anton proclaimed.
"All right!" Akebi enthusiastically stated. "Let's start!"
And so all of the guys and girls there started performing aerobics to some music. Harry and Akebi led everyone in the aerobics.
"This is it!" Saori remarked in satisfaction as the aerobics carried on. "This is what I've been waiting for!"
It was also notable that Piyotan was already getting tired from the aerobics after only a few minutes in.
An hour later, both Oryou and Piyotan had already collapsed from exhaustion. Saori and Yuzu were also getting very tired. But Akebi and all of the guys were still going without breaking a sweat.
Four hours later, Saori and Yuzu had finally given up as they collapsed from exhaustion. But once again, Akebi and all of the guys were still going strong. The guys besides Harry appeared a bit tired, but it wasn't so extreme so as to prevent them from continuing on.
"Huh?" Akebi eventually asked in confusion while in the midst of a one-legged twirl with the other leg straight up in the air. "You're already taking a break?"
"Hey!" Anton barked at the girls as he and the guys continued. They were now performing some intense aerobics with Harry, which currently included quickly kicking their legs up high into the air with their arms crossed in front of them. "I didn't say you could take a break now! So get up and get your lazy behinds moving!"
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The next day near the end of lunchtime, all of the girls for the new club chose to head over to the hangars in an effort to find one specific person. They soon found them eating a colossal amount of potatoes by the Panzer IV H alongside another particular girl, and the group chose to approach.
"You keep eating that much, but why don't you ever get any fatter, Bubi?!" Saori yelled in frustration.
Erich was highly startled by the shout, as was Miho as they sat atop the Panzer IV together eating lunch. Erich had started choking on one of his potatoes because of being startled, but he soon hacked it out.
"Mein Gott, you scared the Scheiße out of me with that," Erich responded as he regained his breath. "But I don't really do anything that special, you know. That's probably just metabolism at work."
"Yeah," Miho confirmed as she also regained her calm demeanor. "If you really want the confirmation, Saori, then no, I haven't seen him get any fatter."
Erich then got down from the Panzer IV and started over to his Bf 109 K-4. "But if you're talking about something that I actually do, then perhaps flying in combat is what's doing it," he continued as he settled down into the Messer. "I get pretty hungry from all the concentration that I need."
"I see…" Saori realized as she looked on at the Bf 109 taxi out of the hangar.
"How active," Oryou remarked as she looked on.
The Jägermeistern team had previously decided to hold an impromptu practice right after lunch, which is why Erich was taking off at the moment. The rest of the pilots had all challenged Erich to a one against all type of fight. They wanted to see what was needed to take down one of the world's top two aces.
And so the girls of the Fitness Club plus Miho watched all of them start their fight after they all got airborne. They then witnessed Erich absolutely annihilate everyone with extreme precision and unbending mercilessness. Nobody ever managed to hit him during the fight, either. The fight itself only lasted a few minutes before the last of the enemy fighters was obliterated by the unstoppable blond-haired German ultra-ace.
After landing, all of the other pilots walked away from their fighters after parking them in front of the hangars. As they walked off, they had looks that displayed amusement mixed with humiliation at not only being defeated, but also being absolutely annihilated, even though they had a seven-to-one numerical advantage. It was a situation that they had originally not foreseen, but later figured was predictable with the benefit of hindsight.
All of the Fitness Club girls looked on at the Messer coming in to land with their jaws dropped in amazed wonder. Miho noticed their looks and silently giggled as she held a hand to her mouth. 'It's not just because of luck that he's gotten literally several hundred kills in such a short time span,' she thought at the same time.
Last to come to the hangars was Erich himself in his Bf 109 K-4. After he swung open the canopy and shut the engine down, he looked absolutely exhausted as he climbed out. "Haa…" he sighed. "I'm beat…"
"Here, Bubi," Miho said to Erich with a calm and inviting smile as she approached him and came beside him. She then walked off with him with her arms around his upper body. "I've got a big serving of Kartoffeln just for you."
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Later, the Fitness Club girls headed off elsewhere, but soon they spotted Ayumi and Mesut approach. Mesut had a bag over his shoulders.
"Oh, hey!" Ayumi greeted as she and Mesut approached the group. "I heard that some of you upperclassmen were on a diet, so I have some of the current recommended diet goods for you to try out!"
"Oh, thank you!" Saori thanked her with a great smile. "You're a life saver!"
"Mesut, let's get on it!" Ayumi told Mesut so as to cue him.
"Jawohl!" Mesut replied as he took the bag off of his shoulders.
And so the two freshmen began to demonstrate the stuff they brought for their upperclassmen.
Mesut had first wrapped up Oryou in a full-body corset of sorts. He then wrapped a cast of sorts around Saori's stomach.
"These are the slim body correction corset and super fat burning cast!" Ayumi detailed as Mesut wrapped Oryou and Saori in said objects.
"Ngh…" Saori groaned out as the air was forced out of her.
Next, Mesut handed Yuzu a bowl of rice that had something blue sparkled over it. He also handed Piyotan a large amount of bottles.
"Control the amount of your food intake by sprinkling it with blue sparkles to lose your appetites!" Ayumi continued to detail. "And just by drinking these you can get slim! Well, maybe… Anyway, those are all of my diet supplies for you! Have a nice day, and good luck!"
Ayumi and Mesut then headed off and left the girls with their new things.
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The next day at lunchtime, Erich and Miho walked up to a lunch table they noticed had Saori at it. She was there with Oryou, Yuzu, and Piyotan. None of them looked very well. Yuzu and Piyotan were eating some of their food that was sprinkled with blue sparkles.
"Ugh…" Saori groaned as she suffered from her body being forced to get skinnier from her super fat burning cast.
"Water…" Oryou moaned out while trying to pick up a glass of water. She couldn't, though, because of the slim body correction corset she had on.
"Um, girls?" Erich wondered with a raised eyebrow. He and Miho had stopped as they looked on in a bit of confusion at all of the girls at the table. "Are you all okay?"
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Later that afternoon after recovering from their diet goods and discontinuing them, all of the girls chose to create a makeshift sauna.
"Confining yourself in a sauna is the current standard!" Saori claimed as all of the girls sweated from the heat. "We'll lose all of our body weight in one go!"
"Girls!" they all heard Anton bark out from outside their makeshift sauna. "What in the goddamned hell are you all doing?!"
"We're just borrowing this for a bit!" Saori responded from inside the makeshift sauna. The so-called 'sauna' was really just the I-Go otsu that belonged to Duck Team.
"What's the meaning behind this bullshit excuse for exercise?!" Anton barked out at the girls from outside. He and the other guys of the Fitness Club were also there.
"Get out of there!" Zitrus demanded.
"You're gonna make that thing rot of excessive sweat!" Dexter warned.
"Get out of the I-Go!" Gustav demanded. All of them then tried to move to drag them out.
"Hot!" all of the guys yelled out as the scolding heat of the armor burned their hands.
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Later that day, Anton and the guys had their hands taped up from the burns they suffered. All of the girls stood before Anton as he paced around in front of them.
"You're all the laziest loads of spoiled shit I have ever seen!" he barked at them. "Losing weight does not come without cost, and that cost is physical fatigue from getting some goddamned exercise!" He then brought up his bandaged hands as he stopped amidst the guys. "Now since we can't effectively lead this charge, I will temporarily hand off this duty to some people who certainly can!"
All of the girls then noticed two people in officer uniforms for the JSDF approach. One was of the JGSDF while the other was of the JASDF.
"Captain Chouno and Captain Honda?!" Saori identified in surprise.
"I heard it, alright!" Muto began as he and Ami approached the group.
"You girls seem to have some difficulties with dieting?" Ami wondered.
Both of them then tore off their officer uniforms in one fell swoop, which left them in some camouflaged versions of the fitness clothes everyone else wore. Both had quite the bodies that they had acquired from their physical training programs for their services.
"Well then, how about you all enlist in the JSDF's boot camp!" Muto suggested.
"All of you can get the bodies of warriors in an instant!" Ami guaranteed.
All of the girls then started imagining how life would be with the bodies of the two JSDF officers. Saori imagined greeting Miho and Erich one morning while effortlessly holding Mako upside down by one of her legs. Yuzu imagined greeting Momo with her body. Oryou imagined something relating to kotetsu for the night while holding a dagger. Piyotan imagined going on a manhunt. All the while, all of their imaginations included Ami and Muto barking orders at them.
Finally, Saori chose to approach the two JSDF Captains and gently push them away.
"Eh?" both Muto and Ami wondered in confusion.
"No thanks," Saori denied the boot camp invitation. 'Besides, we've already got Anton pulling off the drill sarge role pretty well if you ask me,' she also thought.
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So in the end, the girls chose to go with Unternehmen Iss Nicht. That is, they chose to not eat.
The next day, Yuzu was with the rest of the student council in her normal school uniform, but she had a real exhausted look as she held some papers.
"Hey, you okay?" Zitrus asked.
"I'm fine…" Yuzu managed to get out tiredly as she set the papers on Anzu's desk. At the same time, her stomach growled. Upon hearing her stomach growl, she chose to grab her rack as she looked down at it. "In theory, if I eat these, then I shouldn't gain weight no matter what."
"Geh weida, Yuzulein!" Pfirsich reacted in shock.
"But won't it just go from your chest to your stomach instead?" Anzu nonchalantly wondered as she had another of her dried sweet potatoes. She was lying on one of the other tables nearby.
"Ah…" Yuzu seemed to understand as she released her rack and rubbed the back of her head.
"Please shut up, Anzulein," Aprikose requested with an exasperated tone. Anzu was lying against him for the time being as he sat at the table with his back against the edge. "That's not something I want to imagine in a thousand years."
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Around the same time, Piyotan had met up with all of her friends looking like she didn't have much energy. She also had her uniform on.
"Hey, Piyotan, how about we play a game as a change of pace?" Dexter offered with the rest.
"All right…" Piyotan replied without much energy. And so all of them decided to play a game on some handhelds of theirs.
During the game, Piyotan saw her character holding up a large well-done piece of chicken still on the bone. She drooled at the sight. "It's well-done…" she moaned out.
She then started trying to eat her handheld with a great desire for food.
"Piyotan?!" Mark, Momoga, and Nekota reacted in surprise.
"Is this 'Attack on Piyotan?!'" Neville wondered as he looked on in surprise.
"The cake is a lie!" Dexter spoke up as he also looked on in surprise.
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Later that night, the whole Fitness Club chose to confine in the misty sauna of one of the large public baths aboard. All of the guys had towels wrapped around their waists while the girls had one wrapped to cover their racks and groin areas.
"Alright!" Anton barked out. "Since you princesses can't even perform any basic exercise at your current fitness levels, then I'm letting you get away with just reaching half of your goal! Hooah?!"
"Hooah!" everyone replied affirmative.
"After this, we should use the I-Go as a sauna again," Saori suggested.
At the same time, Anton noticed Saki at the entrance to the sauna, also wrapped in a towel. "Oh, hey Saki," he greeted in a friendly manner. "What's up?"
Saki remained silent for a bit before she finally began, "Girls… start to burn fat at the chest first."
Upon hearing that, all of the other girls chose to immediately run out of the sauna with their arms wrapped protectively around their racks. Saki and all of the guys there looked on at them run out. The guys all had lost looks.
"Huh, well that's something I did not know," Anton remarked. He then turned to Saki. "Anyway, you wanna relax in the sauna with us?"
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The next day, all of the members of Anglerfish Team and Messer-Ein were gathered to eat lunch together. All were in their school outfits. Most notable at the moment was Hana having some of her typical big servings along with Erich and his even larger servings of potatoes. Surprisingly, though, Saori also had some more generous servings of food than was usual.
Erich noticed Saori's different behavior and paused his devouring of potatoes to offer comment, "Oh, so you finally stopped with your diet?"
Saori blushed a bit as she tried responding, "W-Well, your health is what's most important, right?" She then dug into some of her food as she continued. "I read in a magazine that boys actually prefer girls that are just a bit chubby! Since a lively appearance without being afraid to eat the things most desired is the most charming one!"
"Sure it is…" Anton muttered with a deadpan as he ate his own food.
Erich and Miho looked to each other with amused grins as they heard Saori's 'expertise' on romance. They were thinking just how very wrong Saori was judging by their own vast experience with each other.
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Later that night, Saori was again on her scale with a towel around her. She was nervous about the scale's current reading.
"… Ah," she grunted in nervousness at the reading she had considered to be too high for her.
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And so the next day, all of the members of the Fitness Club were gathered once again in the fitness outfits. The girls were looking frustrated while the guys looked on at them in a deadpan.
"You're fucking kidding me," Anton finally spoke up as the previous events looked set to fully repeat themselves.
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It's important to just give up sometimes. This is just how girls diet, and unfortunately guys have no choice but to accept it.
Part of Projekt Jägermeistern.
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The author doesn't claim to own "Girls und Panzer" or any other references made. "Girls und Panzer" belongs to Actas. Any references made belong to their respective owners.
Feel free to ask any questions if you have them. Please note, however, that questions asked without being signed in will not be answered. The author would prefer to address questions outside of the story, and leaving questions while signed in provides that ability.