The Legends Still Live On
Bogen Elf: Es ist die dampfende Reise des Adels!
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"Do you know this saying?" Darjeeling began with her usual confident yet calm grin as she raised her cup of tea. She was currently in a very watery environment. "'Though we travel the world over to find the beauty, we must carry it with us, or we shall find it not.'"
"Emerson, wasn't it…?" Orange Pekoe identified from close-by.
"And, with that being said, we have come for a relaxing time in this here spring!" Arthur proclaimed from nearby as he raised his cup of tea. All of those there, which included Arthur, Darjeeling, Orange Pekoe, Assam, Douglas, and Dennis, all had their own cups of tea as they relaxed in an outdoor spring. Assam was unique in having a towel wrapped around her head.
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As for how things got to that point, it all started at one of the shopping districts aboard the HMS Ark Royal some time earlier.
"Oh, what's that?" Darjeeling lit up with a sense of excitement as she pointed to one particular stand.
"It looks like they're doing a lottery," Dennis observed the stand in question.
"I want to try that out!" Darjeeling determined as she looked back to the stand with an eager look.
"Well, do you have a ticket for it or something like that?" Orange Pekoe asked.
But Darjeeling had already rushed off to the lottery stand anyway, and she took a crack at the game set up there. The game was one where the contestant had to throw a ball and hit a target that was set up. It would have been easy, had the target not been quite a distance away and very small in size.
But almost as if making fun of its supposed difficulty, Darjeeling had managed to hit the target on her first throw.
"We got a winner!" the person at the stand announced as a bell started ringing.
"Blimey!" Arthur reacted as he grew some wide eyes at the sight. All of the others minus Darjeeling herself were all looking on in varying manners of shock and surprise. Darjeeling had a more pleasantly surprised look.
As she had achieved victory, Lady Darjeeling had correspondingly won the outdoor spring offered as first prize in the shopping district lottery she had stopped by on a whim.
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"For me, there's no such thing as missing in a lottery!" Darjeeling boasted in her elegant manner.
"Then please draw our lots for the next international tournaments…" Orange Pekoe requested as she held an awkward look.
"Please," Dennis agreed with a similar awkward look. "Anything to avoid fighting those bloody Germans again…"
"Oh, seems like it's getting hot here," Darjeeling nonchalantly remarked. She then lifted her hands up to her French braided hair. "I wonder if I should let down my hair?"
As Darjeeling let her hair down to its full length to the middle of her back, Arthur chose to watch. Upon seeing her state, his eyes widened a bit. He then started growing a grin as he liked what he saw.
Darjeeling noticed and had grown slightly confused. "Oh?" she wondered as she looked over to Arthur. "Arthur, what is so humorous to you? And what's the idea behind that Cheshire grin?"
"Oh, it's nothing," Arthur calmly dismissed as he held his look.
"Oh, really?" Darjeeling retorted. She didn't seem convinced of his reasoning.
"I just got charmed by a certain Lady Darjeeling, though," Arthur revealed as he leaned closer over to Darjeeling. "There's really nothing to it besides that."
"Oh, my," Darjeeling replied as she grew a blushing smile. She then approached Arthur and circled behind him in a teasing manner. "Well how about I charge you if you want to look so much?" she asked with a more teasing grin.
"Will you accept debit cards?" Arthur responded without skipping a beat as he held forth a debit card with one hand.
Darjeeling giggled a bit before she remarked, "Oh, Arthur…" But she took the card anyway and brought it up to her face as she gave it a brief kiss. "There we go. Contract complete!"
She then chose to close the distance between her and Arthur as she gently put her hand under his chin. "Is it limited to just today?" she seductively asked.
"Mmm, Lady Darjeeling…" Arthur grinned in approval as he stared into her blue eyes.
In the meantime, the other four in the spring were looking on at them with hypnotized looks.
Darjeeling noticed and immediately turned to them in extreme embarrassment. "Lads, stop! Don't look!" she cried out. She ended up splashing the water a bit from her turn. Next to her, though, Arthur only looked on at the others with no sign of any embarrassment. He truly wasn't embarrassed, as he had simply chosen to mess with Darjeeling a bit.
"It's not that," Dennis said.
"We were just wondering how far you two would have gone if we kept ignoring you," Douglas notified.
"Also, for some reason, my head feels really heavy now…" Assam revealed as her head started swaying back and forth. "I'm feeling dizzy now…"
"Oh, Assam's head must have become heavy from absorbing the hot steam!" Darjeeling realized as both she and Orange Pekoe began to panic a bit at Assam's current state. "She's about to go off from the heat!"
"It's no problem!" Orange Pekoe informed as the girls rushed forth to help her. "Let's just untie that towel off from your head!"
Darjeeling and Orange Pekoe both removed Assam's towel, which let her hair down in the process. Her long blonde hair then flowed down to its full length, which was long enough to touch the water.
"It's nice to set yourself free in a hot spring, is it not?" Assam posed the idea. The other girls looked on with looks of shock at her hair while the guys chose to get on out. "But this time I'm getting heavy from absorbing too much water!" Assam said with some impetus in her voice as she started heating up again.
"Not our problem, mate," all three of the boys there replied as they left the outdoor spring.
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Later after they all got out of the spring, they headed over to the redressing room to get back into a more presentable state. All of them had dressed in robes for the rest of the day. For now, Darjeeling and Assam were getting their hair done up again to their previous appearances. Orange Pekoe chose to do Darjeeling's while all of the guys were needed to do Assam's long and full hair.
Later, all of them got fully presentable and left the area to head off elsewhere. Both Darjeeling and Arthur chose to lead the rest, but the two British commanders looked a bit giddy for some reason. For what reason was unknown to the other four.
Upon coming up to some place, Darjeeling grew another look of excitement upon spotting the place. "Oh, my!" she reacted. "I wonder what this might be!"
"Hey, lads, take a look at that!" Arthur gestured ahead as he grew a glint in his eye. "Ahead lies paradise!"
"But it's just a little arcade," Orange Pekoe informed with a bit of an awkward smile.
"Hey, there's ping-pong!" Arthur revealed as he pointed over to two ping-pong tables. "Let's play some ping-pong!"
And so all of the British folks decided to have games of ping-pong. They were split into a girls' match and a boy's match at the two tables. Only Arthur and Darjeeling looked enthusiastic about it. The others didn't appear as excited about it as them. They were actually dreading the idea a bit.
"Prepare yourselves!" Arthur proclaimed to Dennis and Douglas on the other side of the table. "Or will this cause you both to black out in lack of blood circulation?"
"Are you seriously fine with a two-against-one match?" Dennis asked with a bit of wonder at his superior's daringness.
"Are you even any good at table tennis?" Douglas asked with a deadpan.
"Of course I am!" Arthur replied with his usual confidence. "I'm actually quite fond of tennis!"
"But those are completely different things, Sir Arthur…" Douglas deadpanned as Arthur tossed the ping-pong ball into the air to serve.
He then delivered an extremely quick serve to the other side and ended up getting an ace. The serve was so quick that Dennis and Douglas didn't even have any time to react. The current score now stood at 15-0.
"Is this good enough for you lads?" Arthur asked as he held a competitive glint in his eye.
"Bloody hell, this guy is really something after all!" both Dennis and Douglas finally said more to themselves in looks of stunned shock. They had now grown even more dreadful of playing ping-pong after seeing how skilled Arthur was at it.
It then became nothing but humiliation for Dennis and Douglas. Arthur first delivered yet another ace serve that bounced off of Dennis' paddle and into his cheek. The impact hurt a bit, but it was nothing Dennis couldn't shake off with a bit of time. That made the score 30-0.
Arthur then offered another ace serve that Douglas tried returning. The sheer amount of spin Arthur put on the ball managed to curve it away and out of his reach, though. The score now stood at 40-0.
For the game point, Arthur offered yet another ace serve straight down the middle, and both Dennis and Douglas rushed to return it. They forgot each other's existence, though, and they ended up hitting their heads on each other's own heads in their rush to return the serve. With that, Arthur won one game with a shutout.
"Can we please make some extra rules?" Dennis panted out in exhaustion. "Or it won't be much of a match…"
"Why not just use the ones we would use anywhere else?" Douglas offered. He was also exhausted.
"Oh, that's jolly good by me!" Arthur granted with plenty of energy. "But the regular rules won't be as fun, though."
So Douglas chose to sit out and watch while Dennis took on Arthur in a new game.
"Do you know this saying?" Arthur asked with a confident grin as he held the ping-pong ball in one hand.
Dennis suddenly grew more inspired and competitive upon hearing Arthur begin another saying.
Douglas also looked on with intrigue. He deduced the coming game should be interesting upon seeing both of them enter another of their 'identifying sayings' games.
"'Remember that happiness is a way of travel, not a destination,'" Arthur quoted as he served the ping-pong ball.
"Roy M. Goodman!" Dennis identified as he returned the serve and began a rally.
"'Never go on trips with anyone you do not love,'" Arthur quoted as he hit the ping-pong ball back to Dennis.
"Hemingway!" Dennis identified as he returned the ball to Arthur.
"'Life is a journey, and death its destination,'" Arthur quoted as he continued the rally.
"John Dryden!" Dennis identified again as he returned the ball to Arthur and continued the rally. In the meanwhile, Douglas was staring on at the match with a blank look.
"'Travel teaches tolerance,'" Arthur quoted as he pinged the ball.
"Disraeli!" Dennis identified as he ponged the ball back. Douglas had unconsciously been nodding his head to the beat made by the ping-pong ball impacting the paddles.
"'Never allow yourself to hate a people because of the actions of a few,'" Arthur quoted as he hit the ball back to Dennis.
"That one was said by Erich Hartmann," Dennis identified as he returned the ball and continued the rally. "Actually, make that both Erich Hartmanns. I remember hearing about how the one we know said something similar recently."
But Arthur did not come up with any more sayings, and he did not continue the rally. He had instead discovered one of the claw games that nobody ever wins.
"Behold, lads!" he announced to everyone else as he grew a glint in his eyes.
"Oh, my!" Darjeeling reacted with a glint in her eyes as well upon seeing the game. "It's a catcher!"
"Ah, yes," Dennis responded with an awkward smile as he and the others besides Darjeeling and Arthur went to get change. "Coin machine, coin machine…"
"Oh, here's a coin machine," Douglas said as he found one. At the same time, all of the others in the coin retrieval group held awkward looks at the antics of their so-called leaders, but they served them anyways.
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Later, the coins were retrieved, and Assam chose to go first. She had managed to claw the ear of a stuffed Dachshund, but the stuffed animal dropped from the claw. "Oh, that's too bad," she remarked in unfortunateness.
"Do you ever get the feeling that these are just impossible to win?" Dennis asked as he looked on with the others.
"Yeah, it seems that way," Douglas opined.
"Do you know this saying?" Darjeeling began. She then rushed forth to the so-called catcher's controls with a determined smile on her face. "'If you try, it can be achieved! If you don't, it will never be!'" she quoted as she aggressively manipulated the controls.
All of the others were watching her and the hook with intrigue as to what would happen next.
"'Achieving no-' Oh, the things over there look cute too!" Darjeeling had begun, but she had diverted her attention to something else. Because of her diversion, the claw had started moving somewhere else while she was unaware.
"Earth to Darjeeling?!" everyone else panicked as they saw the claw's movements. But Darjeeling did not turn back, and she continued manipulating the controls while looking away.
"Ah, it went to a weird spot," Orange Pekoe noted with a tone that implied unfortunateness. The claw had ended up moving deep down into the pile of stuffed animals.
"Because you looked away…" Assam lamented.
But soon, everyone besides the oblivious Darjeeling widened their eyes as they noticed the claw catch one of the stuffed animals by a bandage wrapped around its arm. The animal in question was a Boko doll, which explained why there was a bandage on it.
The claw ended up taking a number of other stuffed animals with it that were all caught on the Boko doll. Five of them ended up getting to the drop-off area.
Darjeeling took them all and handed two each over to Assam and Orange Pekoe. She had tried to offer some to the guys, but they just held up a hand in a gesture saying she didn't have to, so she chose to give them to the girls instead.
"Oh, how wonderful luck!" she commented with a genuine smile as she held a Boko doll.
"Thank you…" Orange Pekoe and Assam awkwardly thanked Darjeeling for the stuffed animals. Among the other stuffed animals was another more normal bear, an owl wrapped in a sheet, a Scottish Fold cat recognizable by its folding ears, and, ironically, a black cat. Often associated with bad luck, in this case, it was good luck that acquired the black cat.
"Hey, let's go over to this one over here next!" Arthur called out. He was sitting at the row of arcade machines present in the small arcade. "Lads, be my opponents!" he insisted as he started the game up.
"Oh, boy, one of those beat-em-up games," Douglas remarked as he and the others approached. "Have you even played one of these before?"
"No, but it doesn't look that hard!" Arthur replied.
During the fights on the arcade machines, it was always Arthur that came out on top. He did so while going perfect in the game as well, meaning he never even got hit once. Dennis sighed in defeat after becoming the latest of Arthur's victims.
Next, all of them went to go pick out numbered balls from one of those random number generators, and Darjeeling managed to pick the winning number. All of the others besides Arthur looked on in disbelief. Arthur just grew a slightly more competitive grin as he grew determined to beat her at the next game.
The next game was one of the racing games. As he had determined to do, Arthur had steamrolled everyone, including Darjeeling. Darjeeling looked at her game screen in disbelief while Arthur held a victorious look mixed with his usual confidence. Behind them were all of the others looking on with awkward smiles at the competitive pair.
Next, all of them decided to play a round of bowling. Darjeeling managed to win this one after bowling a perfect game, or a score of 300. Arthur had missed one pin on the last throw, and ended up with a score of 299 as a result. The others clapped for the great competition, though.
The group then decided to play some pool next, and Arthur won this one. His final shot was one that required jumping the cue ball over another ball in his path. He deliberately picked out the farthest pocket, so he needed as much accuracy on the ball to get it to the pocket. Such accuracy couldn't be achieved with any control if the cue ball was banked off one of the banks with the way the balls were laid out, hence his choice for the trick shot. Everyone had grown anticipating looks at seeing the shot he had to make before looking on in disbelief after Arthur actually made said shot.
Next up came some classic slot machines. Darjeeling got three lucky number sevens all in a row, and she won big in response. The others looked on in disbelief at the massive amounts of coinage she had won.
Another game was effectively a karaoke showdown. Arthur had managed to win this one after managing to sing both the full version of The British Grenadiers along with Back in Control flawlessly. Everyone besides Darjeeling, who also sang, was playing various instruments to fit the mood. Assam had a violin while Orange Pekoe had a large drum, and Douglas had an electric guitar while Dennis had a keyboard.
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Later that night, all of them were back at the large estate that belonged to Darjeeling. They all actually lived there, but it was under Darjeeling's name, so it was legally considered hers.
"Blimey, we sure played a lot," Darjeeling remarked with a smile. The British were all in a room with a mid-size table that could seat six.
"Yeah, but Sir Arthur and Lady Darjeeling were mostly unrivaled though…" Douglas noted with a smile of his own.
"I'll make us some tea," Orange Pekoe started as she reached the boiling vessel. But the sounds of cards hitting the table near them broke her away from the boiling vessel. Douglas, Assam, Orange Pekoe, and Dennis all grew a bit surprised as they raised their eyebrows.
They all grew a bit surprised until they saw that Darjeeling was shuffling a deck of cards in her hands, and everyone started sweating nervously upon discovering the implications of her actions.
Arthur already had a full hand of five cards, and he nonchalantly scanned them. "I think it's about time we start with the more adult games now, isn't it?" he asked them with his typical confident grin as he held his poker hand with just one hand.
"Man, these guys are nonstop!" all of the others besides Darjeeling and Arthur reacted in stunned shock. They finally got it together, though, as they joined in, even if regrettably upon realizing they didn't really have much of a choice.
"These two just have to be great poker players," Douglas figured as he sorted his hand.
"It seems like their hands had been coming together ever since the beginning…" Dennis guessed with an awkward smile as he sorted his own hand.
"Oh, can this be?" Darjeeling wondered with an elated smile upon looking at her hand.
"It seems like something's about to come," Orange Pekoe determined, and she folded in response.
"She's someone where you don't know if it even takes a turn in poker," Assam remarked as she also folded.
"Oh, bloody hell, screw this hand," Dennis chose to fold as well.
"Bah, why do I always get the shit hands?" Douglas also chose to fold his hand. So now only Arthur and Darjeeling remained in play.
Arthur had a look of displeasure on his face as he looked at his hand. "I don't like this hand, but there is no bloody way in hell that I would give you a free win," Arthur finally spoke up. "Raise."
"Oh, really?" Darjeeling retorted with a cocky grin. "How about I raise you again?"
"You want to go all the way and go all in?" Arthur challenged as he went all in.
"Alright then, I'll call that," Darjeeling accepted the challenge and chose to go all in as well.
Darjeeling chose to reveal her hand first. "Straight flush," she revealed with confidence. She had a straight flush from two to six, all hearts.
"Royal flush!" Arthur retorted as he flopped his hand over. He indeed had a royal flush, of spades to be specific. Darjeeling pouted in response at getting defeated. She had gotten played by Arthur as he deliberately feigned having an awful hand.
"This is one of those games where it's best to pull out of it when you can sense danger," Dennis remarked as the others awkwardly stared on at the game.
"But does that mean we can have a pillow fight next?" Orange Pekoe asked. All of the others besides Arthur and Darjeeling were by now holding something behind their backs. Assam and Douglas both had slightly mischievous looks at what was lined up next.
"Yes, but of course!" Arthur granted. "Let us just get the futon ready and-"
"Surprise!" the other four proclaimed as they pulled out pillows from behind their backs. Both Arthur and Darjeeling grew surprised for the first time that night.
"Let us make the first move for once!" Dennis proclaimed in addition.
"Lady Darjeeling and Sir Arthur, prepare your arses!" Douglas also proclaimed as all four of those armed with pillows surrounded the two British commanders.
"Surprise!" both Darjeeling and Arthur counterclaimed as they each pulled out two pillows. With their revelation that they were also armed with pillows, the other four had grown stunned momentarily, and Arthur and Darjeeling chose to take advantage.
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Later after the pillow fight was over, Assam, Douglas, Dennis, and Orange Pekoe were lying on the ground amongst many pillows after being soundly defeated.
"I don't think we'll ever be able to match those two in a lifetime," Dennis remarked as he lied in defeat.
"What a coincidence, I had similar thoughts…" Douglas spoke up.
"Just where is that thing…?" Assam muttered to herself as she tried searching for something amongst the pillows.
"Lady Darjeeling, Sir Arthur…" Orange Pekoe complained. "I'm already worn out…"
Upon not hearing a response, Orange Pekoe grew confused. "Hello?" she asked as she looked around. "Lady Darjeeling? Sir Arthur?"
All four of the others then more clearly heard the gentle breathing of someone sleeping, and they all looked to the source. The source was both Arthur and Darjeeling that had both fallen asleep. For whatever reason, Darjeeling was curled up atop Arthur, but the British fighter ace didn't seem to even notice it as he slept on.
"Mother of God…" Douglas said with an exasperated grin.
"Really now," Dennis said with a similar grin. "There's no way we can match that in reality."
Assam then showed the others a small camera she had brought along, and she winked in a way that conveyed her plans to them. The others nodded as they understood and returned looks of agreement.
All of them then decided to lie around the two sleeping British commanders in such a way that all of their heads were close to each other. All of them besides those sleeping smiled as Assam held up the camera above them. It was pointed such that it would capture everyone's face from above. Upon getting everything set up, Assam then snapped the picture.
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Part of Projekt Jägermeistern.
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The author doesn't claim to own "Girls und Panzer" or any other references made. "Girls und Panzer" belongs to Actas. Any references made belong to their respective owners.
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