Got bored. Decided to write a Stick of Truth chapter where all the kids are their actual characters. And they're aged up. Oh, and I changed Kate's role a bit. I think you'll like what I'm doing.

Not Kate X Kenny!

Deep in the forests of Zaron, behind a picturesque waterfall, there was a network of hidden caves. Within these hidden caves lived a group of young women, unknown to the world outside of their home. They kept to themselves out of fear of the savage men that lurked outside. Rumors of the wars between the humans of Kupa Keep and the Drow Elves of Larnion had reached even them in their almost complete solitude. None of them wanted to be drawn into the conflict. After all, they were women who wouldn't be allowed on the battlefield, but they would surely be taken prisoner.

They called themselves the Ladies of the Waterfall, and isolation from the rest of civilization was their way of life. For food, they hunted and foraged in the woods. If they needed to heal, they used healing spells and herbs. None of them had any reason to leave the forests, or even go too far from the waterfall that concealed their home from outsiders. Their society remained unknown to the Elves and humans alike, save for women seeking refuge.

Until one fateful day…

"My King, I think we're lost."

Kyle glanced at Stan, who was checking his compass. They'd decided to try and map out the forests of Zaron in an effort to catch Kupa Keep off-guard, but they'd been wandering for a few days. So far, they had no hope of escaping the forest.

"I think you're right, Stan. Let's make camp for the night."

The two men slid off their horses and began pulling their things out of the saddlebags. Together, they prepared to settle in before nightfall.

A stick cracked in the bushes in front of Kyle.

"Who's there?!" he asked, pulling out his staff. Panicked footsteps began to fade as whoever it was ran away. "Hey!"

The Elf King began to give chase, his top general right behind him. Through the trees, he could see the back of a young girl's head. She wore a dress of animal hides and appeared to be terrified.

"Stop!" Stan yelled.

Suddenly, both men tripped over a tree root that had sprung from the ground. Kyle coughed up some of the grass he'd swallowed as a result. The girl vanished into the trees.

"What the fuck just happened?!" Stan inquired. "There's no way she did that!"

"Leave this forest!" a female voice demanded.

"We'd love to, but we're lost!" Kyle snapped, annoyed.

"Who are you?" a second female voice asked.

"I'm the Elf King Kyle. This is my top general, Stan Marshwalker."

"…you mentioned that you're lost. Why come here in the first place?"

"Who cares why they're here?!" the first voice groaned. "They need to leave."

"We wanted to map the forest so we can invade Kupa Keep," Stan told the voices honestly. "If you live in the forest, we don't want to hurt you."

There was the sound of branches breaking before two girls dressed in animal hides landed lightly in front of them. They both had pale skin and looked strong. One had dark brown hair, freckles, and bright green eyes. The other had black hair the color of raven's feathers and brown eyes.

"I'm sorry for invading your home," Kyle stated, bowing.

"And attempting to attack our sister," added the brunette, crossing her arms.

"We didn't realize humans lived in the forest of Zaron—at least, not so deep within the trees."

"You need to leave," the girl with black hair insisted.

"Please, we're lost. We have no idea how to get back to Larnion from here. Could you help us?"

"The Chieftess has a map of the forest," the brunette stated. "We should take them to her."

"And let them into our home? Never! Outsiders are forbidden within the caves."

"Excuse me for asking, but what are your names?" Stan spoke up.

"I'm Wendy, and this is Kate."

"I'll stay with them and you can bring the Chieftess here," offered Kate.

"That works. Restrain them so they can't attack."

"What?!" Kyle yelped as Wendy left. Kate's eyes glowed and she raised a hand. Vines erupted from the ground and held the two men in place.

"It's nothing personal," Kate sighed. "We've had trouble with invaders in the past, and we don't trust strangers in our forest."

"I get it, but is restraining us really the best solution?"

"You'd be surprised what's been done to us. This is just standard protocol."

Kyle found himself looking into her eyes. They were a green that seemed to reflect the leaves of the trees, the new growth that accompanied each spring. She was obviously controlling the plants that were restraining him and Stan, so she was also a mage of some kind. In order for that kind of magic to work, a deep connection with nature was required—one that she obviously had. Elves had always prided themselves on being the only race with that kind of connection with the world around them.

She must have elven blood…

Within minutes, Wendy returned with a blonde woman and two guards. Both the guards were female, as well.

Is this tribe made up entirely of women?

"These are the intruders?" asked the blonde woman, glancing over Stan and Kyle.

"We didn't intend to hurt you, Your Grace!" Kyle insisted quickly. "We just got lost."

Bebe's blue eyes glowed like Kate's had earlier as she scanned them. It was an uncomfortable gaze before she nodded.

"Let them down. We'll lead them to the path, but then they must leave."

Kate released her vines and Stan and Kyle hit the ground with loud thuds.

"Pardon me, Your Grace," Kyle stated, clearing his throat. "But, as a neighboring ruler, I'd like to extend a hand of friendship between our two groups."

"My tribe has lived for centuries without needing outside interference. Why should we start now?"

"Because you have powerful magic! You can help us end the war with the humans."

"Do you know what our tribe is made up of, King Kyle?"

"Um…"

"Most of the women in my tribe have been hurt by this war. Some of us were born here in the forest, but most of us came from outside it. In some way, this is the last safe place for females because of what you and your people have done. Why would we jeopardize that by becoming your ally?"

"Because we'll make sure that the location of your tribe remains a secret. If you want to meet, send a messenger to Larnion to arrange the meeting. You don't have to risk the safety of your tribe, and we'll only seek you out in times of dire need."

Bebe blinked, then a look of interest crossed her face.

"You swear that you won't hurt our tribe? You swear to the gods themselves?"

"Yes." Kyle nodded.

"Then, as a show of good faith, I will send one of my warriors with you to escort you out of the forest. She'll spend one night as your guest and return. Is that fair?"

"Yes, Your Grace." Bebe smiled.

"Well then, you can camp for the night and tomorrow, Kate will find you and bring you out."

"Are you two ready to go?"

Kyle woke at the sudden voice. He shot up to see Kate standing there, wearing clothes made of an elven cloth rather than animal hides. Her hair was still braided, though, and she was carrying a pack. Obviously, she was ready to go.

"Sorry, did I wake you up?" she asked. "I thought you were meditating."

"No, it's fine. We'll be ready in a few minutes. You'll be riding with me."

"I already packed up the campsite," Stan called. "All that's left is your sleeping roll."

Kyle stood up and rolled up his sleeping roll before stashing it in his saddlebag. It was then that he reached out his hand to Kate.

"Come on. I'll help you on."

Kate took his outstretched hand and he helped her into the saddle. He climbed on behind her and she directed them through the trees. Within a couple hours, they were out and could see Larnion in the distance. Almost immediately, a feeling of relief went through the top-tier elven warriors and they increased their speed towards the kingdom, where they could see thick smoke rising from it.

"What the fuck?!" Stan gasped.

"What the hell happened?" Kyle whispered. The Elves emerged from the broken remains of houses and shops to see who was coming through, weapons in hand. Upon seeing it was their king, however, they began to cheer.

"Y-you've r-r-re-returned!" stammered the Bard, Jimmy, emerging from the castle on his crutches. Kyle got off of his horse and helped Kate to the ground. "And wh-who is this m-m-maiden with you?"

"This is Kate. She'll be spending the night here. Kate, this is Jimmy, better known as the Bard."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Sir Jimmy," Kate said, bowing politely. He blinked, smiling.

"And the s-s-sa-same to you, L-L-La-Lady Kate! W-w-wel-welcome to L-Larnion!"

"Thank you."

Several of the other elven warriors came forwards, whispering about this mysterious girl that their king had brought back from his travels outside the kingdom. Kate shifted in discomfort and Kyle coughed, getting the attention of his army.

"Kate is here for one night as our guest," he declared. "She'll be shown the utmost respect while she's here. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Your Majesty!" The Elves saluted their king and headed off to rebuild. All except for Bradley, who Stan had asked to stay behind and explain what had happened.

"The humans attacked while you were gone. They destroyed as much as they could while Craig Feldspar took the Stick. I'm sorry we couldn't stop him, Your Majesty."

"I'm just glad there weren't many casualties," Kyle sighed. He noticed Kate looking at the castle in awe.

"It's like home…" she murmured.

"Come inside and we'll find you a place to sleep."

As the two of them walked through the palace, Kyle could hear the whispers about Kate even more clearly. Some said she was a trophy from a battle he'd fought on his journey. Others said she was his lost love, come to take her rightful place as the Elf Queen.

A wedding might boost morale… no! You promised that she'd return home!

"Who's the current Elf Queen?"

Kate's question startled Kyle from his thoughts as they entered a guest room.

"What?!"

"Who's the current Elf Queen? Your people said I should take my rightful place. Doesn't that mean there's someone in the position already?"

"N-no. There isn't an Elf Queen right now. The closest we have is my mother, but she and my father left the kingdom once I took the throne."

"Oh. So why do they want me?"

"Honestly, you're the first female they've seen me interact with besides my mother. I guess they're hoping with a queen, they'll have more to fight for as a kingdom." He coughed. "Not that I want you to be the queen! I promised your Chieftess you'd be returned tomorrow, so that's that."

"Well, there's nothing keeping me from coming back, is there?"

"There isn't, but you don't have to—"

"Your kingdom is in big trouble, Kyle. Obviously, the war with the humans is taking a drastic turn. You'll need warriors to fight for you, and boost spirits somehow."

"Kate…"

"And, if it's me not having elven blood you're worried about, my mother was an elf. She left Larnion when she was pregnant with me because a human raped her. I'm the product of that shameful union and I want to see the humans destroyed just as much as you do, if not more. Let me help."

"Okay. We're glad to have you."

A couple months passed. Kate became a permanent resident of the castle, which did nothing to sooth the rumors of her and the king's relationship. The Elves managed to take back the Stick of Truth and heal much of the kingdom. In those couple months, as well, Kyle and Kate had become close friends. When the Stick was again taken by the humans, it was Kate who came up with the plan to retrieve it.

And then she came up with a second idea, which she passed onto Stan.

"Kyle, when are you going to make Kate the Elf Queen?"

Kyle choked on his drink at Stan's sudden question.

"What the fuck, Stan?!"

"Sorry, it's just… she's a powerful mage and she's of elven blood, not to mention you're obviously in love with her."

"I'll have to ask Bebe. If I'm going to marry a member of her tribe, I might as well get her permission."

"You already have it. Bebe gave it on her last visit."

"She did?"

"She said that if you want to marry Kate and make her the queen, then she'll support it as long as she's invited to the wedding."

Kyle stood up and rushed out of the room, heading towards the library where he'd last seen Kate. She was nowhere to be found there, so he headed out into the gardens. The mage was making trees and vines grow from the ground into intricate shapes—a beautiful and confusing display if you didn't know about her magical ability. Kyle tapped her on the shoulder and she let out a yelp.

"Kyle, what the fuck?"

"Will you become the Elf Queen?" She blinked.

"What?"

"Will you marry me and become Queen of the Drow Elves?"

"Yes. I will."

Their engagement was announced to the kingdom that afternoon to much rejoicing.

"My Lord!"

The Grand Wizard, Eric Cartman, looked up from his lunch at the Paladin Butters. He was annoyed at the interruption, but he also knew that Butters wouldn't interrupt him without a good reason.

"Yes, what is it?"

"The Elves—they're going to have a queen now!"

"A queen. You interrupted my meal to tell me that a useless woman is going to be standing by King Kyle's side."

"She's not useless, if the rumors I heard are true," stated Princess Kenny. "Her name is Kate, and she's a powerful mage of both elven and human blood. Supposedly, she came from a tribe of women that the Elves are now allies with, and by marrying Kyle, she's solidifying the alliance."

"Hm… this could be bad."

"I've also heard that her entire tribe is made up of powerful warriors," added Craig. "Crossing them would mean death."

"I know of this tribe," Mike Silverton, a man who'd served the kingdom for many years, piped up. "My wife, while she was pregnant with our child, ran into the woods so she could leave me. I saw her again a few years later, and she'd joined that very tribe. She refused to tell me what had happened to my child, so I killed her."

"As you should have. That child was to be a part of Kupa Keep!" declared the Grand Wizard. "She robbed us of a warrior!"

"If you like, I can try and find this tribe to have them ally with us instead."

"Yes, do that!"

Mike vanished out the door.

Less than a week later, the doors opened again, this time by a young woman with dark brown hair. She was accompanied by Stan Marshwalker, King Kyle, the Bard, a second young woman with raven-black hair, and a young woman with curly blonde hair.

"Drow Elves!" Cartman yelled, pointing at the intruders.

"We haven't come to fight, Grand Wizard," Kyle stated, keeping his temper in check. Suddenly, the brunette's eyes glazed over and became a darker green. A look of horror came over her face and she dropped to her knees, crying out. "Kate!"

"So this is the Kate of rumors?"

Kate stopped crying and staggered to her feet, shaking.

"Was it another vision?" the black-haired woman asked.

"Yes. And I think it has to do with all of us. Every tribe, kingdom, and faction in Zaron."

"What was in your vision, witch?" Craig demanded to know.

"I… I saw a battle, between every faction in Zaron. And an army of the dead, revived by a green elixir that transformed them into monsters. There were rains of fire, blood, and arrows, and the smell of magic. Then suddenly, a single warrior entered the battlefield. They single-handedly ended the battle and took the Stick… and then there was peace."

"Any way of telling when this battle is coming?" asked Stan.

"It will be within a year's time. My visions don't reach farther than that. But… this vision tells me a single warrior will end the fighting and take control of the Stick of Truth. I can't tell if the peace came at the cost of blood or if… if they united all factions. All I know is that one warrior will end it all."

"Then… we must find this warrior!" Cartman snapped. "And he will fight for the humans of Kupa Keep!"

"They'll fight for the Elves!" Kyle shot back.

"No! She'll fight for the Ladies of the Waterfall!" the blonde hissed.

Kate sighed; this power was a blessing and a curse.

She had no control over it, but it was letting her know that peace was not only possible; it was coming within a year's time. The wars that had raged for a thousand years would end and Zaron would know peace.

Now all that was left to do was wait.

So, yeah, this actually plays into Kate's original conception.

When I first created Kate, Lisa was her aunt, not her mother, and Kate moved to South Park after a car accident that killed her parents and left her paralyzed from the waist down. In that iteration, Kate was a master strategist who kept an eye on battle via drone and only communicated with Kyle, who she had a crush on. Mike was still her father, but he wasn't abusive; in fact, he was a fantastic father. Her mother didn't have a name.

She eventually developed into the Jersey girl we all know and love.

In this version of the story, Kate is essentially part of a group that's meant to parallel the Amazons in a way. Bebe is the leader of this group, and this is my way of making the Girls a factor in this medieval world. Oh, and yes, if it were just Stick of Truth and her original conception, Kate would totally end up with Kyle. Of course, that doesn't mean she doesn't have Kenny. Princess Kenny and Elf Queen Kate are totally lovers once the wars are over.

Oh, well.

So long and thanks for all the fish!