Shizuo's command was the only thing keeping him walking. His legs were weak and his brain was fuzzy. There was still the tiny part in the back of his head screaming at him but he was too exhausted to care. Everything felt hopeless. Shizuo knew. Shizuo had humiliated him on the worst level.
Izaya stumbled through his door and fell to his knees, the band no longer keeping him up. He sat there and tried to remember how to breath. What if Shizuo decided to kill him? What if he decided to keep him? Shizuo could make him nothing more than a doll with one sentence.
Izaya took a sharp, shaky breath and brought his legs up so he could rest his forehead on them. He was never going to live this down. Not to mention that he'd have to have Shizuo's permission to be in Ikebukuro. How was he supposed to work? Shiki needed him to gather information and would be very unimpressed with any kind of explanation he could give.
He grit his teeth as panicked tears filled his eyes. His life was over all because of some stupid Soul mate legend. He stood and stumbled to the couch, throwing an arm over his eyes to catch the stubborn tears. He might as well write a will because the chances of him surviving this were minuscule.
Shizuo glared at the ground as he walked, throwing his cigarette away. It wasn't helping. His thoughts were a mess. He'd gone too far. He shouldn't have done that. Even if half his brain was shouting that Izaya deserved what he got he knew it was the wrong thing to do.
Fuck. The flea's terrified face kept flashing through his mind. He didn't have to do any of that. He could have just ordered Izaya to stay out of the city and been done with it. He stomped inside his apartment and immediately headed for the bathroom. He needed a shower, maybe afterword's he might feel less like a piece of shit.
~ Time Skip ~
Izaya groaned as he woke up, he'd accidentally drifted to sleep on the couch. He wiped the sleep from his eyes and checked the time, sighing as he saw it was midnight. He stood up, glad to feel his legs hold him, and went to go get in the shower. He still had the grime of the city and the inside of his boxers was crusty with dried cum. It was a disgusting feeling.
He turned the water on to his preferred temperature and stripped off his clothes, chucking them into the laundry hamper. He released a content sigh as he stepped into the shower, hot water pouring over his body and relaxing him almost instantly. He took his time washing himself and felt much better about himself when he stepped out. He wouldn't let this beat him.
He wrapped a towel around himself and grinned. His first step will be planning how to make Shinra's life hell, Izaya will never forgive him for what he did. Second will be faking his way into Shizuo's good graces. He couldn't afford to be kept out of Ikebukuro. Third will be to get the information for Shiki and then, hopefully, kill Shizuo off. He didn't need that kind of weakness in his life.
As he dressed for bed he felt more in control. He would have to think more on it in the morning but just having a plan made him feel better. He wouldn't go down without a fight. Fate didn't control him.
Shizuo sat on his couch and sighed, phone in hand. He should tell Shinra that Izaya might have it out for him now. It was stupid to tell Izaya that Shinra had told him about this. He sent Celty a text and received one back almost instantly.
Shizuo: I accidentally let slip to Izaya that you guys told me about the Soul Mate stuff.
Celty: Eh? What happened!
Shizuo shifted uncomfortably.
Shizuo: I trapped him in an alley and did some things I'm not proud of. I told him he couldn't come to the city anymore.
Celty: What did you do to him? He can't come to the city? Isn't that good?
Shizuo sighed, taking out a cigarette and lighting it. The nicotine calmed him down a little. He sent Celty another text.
Shizuo: I don't wanna talk about it. And yeah, it's great but he's crafty. If he goes after you guys somehow let me know.
Celty: Okay, I will. I'll tell Shinra too. And Shizuo
There was a small pause and then.
Celty: Don't do anything else you'll regret.
Shizuo laughed weakly and took a long drag off his cigarette.
Shizuo: Easier said than done. I gotta sleep though, we'll talk more later.
Celty: Okay. Goodnight.
Shizuo: Night.
Shizuo sighed, letting his phone drop onto the table. He was exhausted and still felt guilty. He put his phone on the charger and went to bed. He wanted today to be over.