Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out, inspiration is hard to come by. I hope you all enjoy!
Izaya stalks down the street, the dark look on his face more than enough to keep people away from him. The buzz of stress is his constant companion, but he doesn't want to go back to his empty apartment. He kicks at a rock in his path and his scowl deepens when he thinks of Shizuo. He wants things back the way they were before, this whole soulmate situation was terribly stacked in Shizuo's favor. Even if they ever could get along how would a healthy relationship even be possible with such a power imbalance in place?
Izaya knew that some people willingly submitted to a similar form of relationship, collar and all, but it was a mutual relationship still. Both parties had the ability to call off the power imbalance and consent was key. Fate seemed to be the sadistic type who liked to force others into toxic situations, though Izaya could admit that to some degree he might deserve this it was just a bit too extreme, too unbalanced. Submit or die, a simple choice to some maybe but who's to say that submitting to Shizuo won't end in his death anyway? What if the bond can't overcome Shizuo's hatred for him, or if Shizuo loses control of his temper and Izaya is nearby as the most convenient target? There's just too many possibilities, let alone that Izaya had been determined to hate Shizuo since high school.
He still can't forgive what Shizuo did too him either, he shudders as he remembers the humiliating pleasure, he can't allow that to happen again. Even if Shizuo promised to never use commands again it doesn't mean he'll keep his word. If he gets mad or just decides a promise to a 'flea' doesn't matter as much as revenge... Izaya doesn't want to think about it. He's distracted from his thoughts by a sleek black car pulling up beside him, the window rolls down slowly revealing Shiki.
"Orihara-san."
Shiki says in greeting and Izaya pulls up a calm smile.
"Good afternoon, Shiki-san~ What can I help you with today?"
His hands tighten into fists in his jacket pockets, he does not need this today. Shiki gives him an unreadable look.
"Get in the car, we have some things to discuss."
Izaya only hesitates a moment before reaching out for the handle, denying Shiki isn't a smart decision no matter how much he just wants to be left alone. He opens the door and slides onto the soft leather seat before closing the door behind him. The car pulls away from the curb the moment he closes the door, but Izaya doesn't pay that fact much attention, he's used to this.
"I'm all ears, Shiki-san."
Shiki takes a puff of his cigarette before replying.
"Any news on the mole yet?"
He figured that's what this would be about.
"A few things, nothing concrete yet. He's good at hiding."
It would be easier if he could go to Ikebukuro but he's not going to reveal that to Shiki. The Awakusu executive nods and flicks his ashes into the car ashtray.
"As our best informant I'd hoped you'd have more by now, surely you can do better than this?"
Izaya's smile strains at that, Shiki doubting his abilities is definitely a bad thing.
"I assure you I've been working very hard on this, I'm sure I'll find what I need very soon."
Shiki gives him a calculating look, a long silence falling over the vehicle.
"You'd better Orihara-san."
Izaya is about to reply but a sudden bolt of pain flashes up his spine and he doubles over in the seat with a choked groan, the pain gets worse and worse as he sits there, and he can feel the collar sparking against his neck. Shiki's driver must have taken them to Ikebukuro, he curses his luck. Shiki's voice filters through the pain clouding his thoughts.
"Orihara-san? Are you alright?"
There's concern in his voice and Izaya bites back a pained whimper. He forces himself to ignore the pain, the faster he can finish his conversation with Shiki the sooner he can go back to Shinjuku. He manages to sit up, ignoring the insistent sparking of the collar, at least Shiki can't see it since it's covered by his jacket. He swallows once and forces a smile.
"I'm fine."
Shiki raises his eyebrow at that.
"Are you sure about that?"
Izaya nods.
"I'm sure, thank you for your concern though."
Shiki looks him up and down with disbelief written over his expression but, he drops the subject.
"Then I'll end this conversation here, don't forget what we discussed, Orihara-san."
Izaya nods as gracefully as he can.
"I'll be sure to find him as soon as I can, Shiki-san. Have a good afternoon."
The pain gets worse with every second and all he can think of is the need to leave, to get out of the city and get rid of this pain.
Shiki nods and the car slows and pulls up by the curb. Izaya has to stop himself from scrambling for the handle but he manages to go a normal pace. Just as he's about to exit the car Shiki speaks up.
"Take care of yourself Orihara-san, you don't look well."
He steps out of the car and nods to Shiki from the sidewalk.
"I will, Shiki-san."
He closes the door and Shiki's driver pulls away from the curb. The car drives out of sight and Izaya's legs nearly buckle as the pain increases again, he can't stop the sharp whimper that falls past his clenched teeth and he leans against the wall of a nearby building to steady himself. At least the street he's on is empty so nobody can witness his pitiful display, eventually he manages to get used to the pain level enough that he can walk without faltering. It's going to be a hellish walk back to Shinjuku.
Shizuo waits nervously for Kasuka to speak. He'd just finished explaining the situation and had even showed his brother the book. For a long moment there was only silence as Kasuka thought it over then,
"It seems to me like you've both made a lot of mistakes in this. Until he can come to terms with this and accept it there's not much you can do but continue the meetings he wants to set up and try to convince him that you really do want things to be better. If you two are truly meant to be I'm sure it will work out in the end."
Shizuo sighs, running his hand through his hair.
"That's the thing, Izaya can be even more stubborn than I can sometimes. I don't know if he even will accept it and if he doesn't he'll die..."
It's all so complicated and stressful and Shizuo doesn't know if he can handle any of it. Kasuka gives him a sympathetic look.
"If fate is real then anything that does happen would happen no matter what you do, so if he dies it was meant to happen, simple as that."
Shizuo blinks, he hadn't thought of it that way. It makes sense, but it seems too convenient, almost like it could be used to excuse any mistakes on his part.
"I don't think that's how it works..."
Kasuka nods.
"Maybe not but even if he refuses to accept the bond it won't be your fault. Just talk with him, get him to trust you. If neither of you work for it, you'll never get along."
Shizuo nods, shoulders drooping, it won't be easy but maybe if he just tries hard enough things will turn out alright. He's about to reply to Kasuka when an odd feeling shudders up his spine and he knows instantly that Izaya is in the city. His brow furrows, shouldn't his order have kept him out? Something is odd here. If Izaya disobeys an order he feels pain but as the feeling doesn't go away and just gets stronger Shizuo gets the urge to go to him and the longer his sits here the more he feels the need to leave.
Kasuka is giving him a concerned look.
"Brother? Is something wrong?"
Shizuo tries to shake the feeling off but it's impossible.
"Something's weird... I gotta go. You can wait here if you want?"
Kasuka frowns slightly.
"I have to get back to work, call if you need something."
Shizuo nods, distracted by the buzzing under his skin.
"See you later."
He mutters, the feeling guiding him to his feet before he even realizes it. The only thing he can think of is his need to get to Izaya.
'He broke the rules'
Something inside him whispers.
'He's in pain somewhere.'
A different part whispers and Shizuo grits his teeth and forces the feeling aside so he can think. Kasuka is still looking at him in concern and Shizuo sighs.
"Sorry, something's wrong with Izaya."
Kasuka shakes his head, getting to his feet as well.
"I figured that had to be the problem. I'll see you some other time."
Shizuo gives Kasuka a soft smile, ignoring the buzzing building in his skull.
"Alright, good luck with your new project."
Kasuka nods, a small smile lighting his features.
"Good luck with your problem, Shizuo."
And he leaves Shizuo following close behind to watch as Kasuka makes it safely to his car and his driver pulls away from the curb with a wave to Shizuo but Shizuo doesn't wave back, too distracted by the bond to notice. As soon as Kasuka's car is out of sight he sets off in search of Izaya, the buzz of his thoughts guiding him as he goes.