Another chapter for you all! Loads of praise goes to my super awesome beta, Deathsembrace137. She is one of my triad of DB Soul Mates, and I love her. Thanks for continuing to read my story! You guys are the best!

Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail.

CHAPTER 25: WHEN I SEE YOU SMILE

LUCY'S POV

Rogue sighed, leaving the conversation alone for the moment. "Come on. Let's get you something to eat."

I let him lead me from the room, and then he stopped to look at Cana and Gray, jerking his head towards the kitchen in invitation for them to follow. "You two want to join us?"

Gray's eyes widened a bit, but he turned to his companion, waiting for the brunette to nod her agreement, before he answered, "Sure. Thanks."

Rogue put his arm around my shoulders, directing me to sit on the couch. "What do you feel like eating, Lucy?"

I shook my head, the idea of food sounding far too unappetizing to me. "I don't want anything," I said quietly.

"Lucy," he called sternly, waiting for me to look at him to continue, "We've talked about this. You need to eat."

"Rogue, I'm not hungry. I don't-"

Before I could go any further, he stopped me, frowning in concern. "You need to have something. How about something light, maybe some soup."

Sighing, I nodded my head in agreement. I knew he wouldn't let it go, especially not after what had just happened. I could see the determination in his eyes. I wouldn't win this one, so I just went along with it. I could choke down a few bites if it would make him happy.

Upon receiving my concession, he smiled and moved to the kitchen, glancing back to ask my guild mates, "Soup and sandwiches alright with you two?"

"Yes, thank you," Cana answered gratefully while Gray followed the other man, offering his help.

The two dark-haired men work side by side silently, throwing things together for a simple vegetable soup. I couldn't help the small smile that came to my face as I watched Gray following Rogue's movements in the kitchen. Gray had never been much of a cook, his talents definitely lacking in that department, so to see him try to imitate the other man was nothing short of amusing.

"It's good to see you smile, Lucy."

My mouth drooped as I turned to Cana, finding an equally timid smile on her face before she turned back to the spectacle in the kitchen. "He looks ridiculous in there trying to cook, doesn't he?"

I joined her in her perusal and found that my amusement hadn't waned. The poor man was completely inept in this respect. "Yes, he does."

I studied the two of them, finding even more hilarity in the situation as Rogue frowned crossly at Gray when he tried to put finger-sized chunks of carrots into the soup. Then when Rogue asked him to get the garlic, Gray nearly dropped the entire bulb into the pot, peeling and all.

"Oh my God, we may have to forget the soup," Cana whispered covertly.

Gray smiled sheepishly at the other man, holding his hands up in silent apology, and I giggled. He was hopeless. "It may be completely inedible."

Rogue turned at the sound of my giggle, his face tinged with something that resembled amazement as he smiled at me. "You could have warned me that he does so poorly in the kitchen," he teased.

Gray huffed behind him, adopting an offended stance as he rolled his eyes. "I'm not that bad."

"Yes, you are. You're the worst cook I've ever seen," Cana ribbed good-naturedly, glancing over to get my approval, "Don't you think so, Lucy?"

"She's on my side," Gray returned, looking at me as well, "Aren't you, Sis?"

I bit my lip on a smile, as everyone looked to me for the final say. "Umm...well, you're not exactly..."

Rogue called a halt to my prevarication, reminding me, "Lucy, I thought we talked about lying."

I slumped in my seat, my shoulders drooping marginally as I gave my answer to Gray. "Alright, you're horrible."

"What?" He stood there defeated, his mouth turned down into a pout as Rogue and Cana claimed their victory.

Rogue nodded sagely as if his wisdom had been vindicated, while Cana pulled out all the stops, acting like a child as she hopped from her seat to poke him in the forehead. "Ha! Who's side is she on? Mine!"

Gray reached out to thump her head, before folding his arms across his chest and sticking his tongue out at her. I smiled at the two of them. This was who they were, goofy and silly. This was the first time any of my guild mates had come to see me and actually been themselves.

Maybe that was what was missing before, why it didn't feel good to be around them. They had all been tiptoeing around me, acting completely opposite of what was normal, and it made me feel worse. I felt like I was responsible for changing them into these sad little versions of themselves, and I couldn't handle feeling that way.

The way they looked at me with those pitying eyes just made me feel like a freak. I couldn't really deny it, but I hated being pitied. Every glance was a reminder that I'd never be the same, that they'd never be the same, and I needed someone to tell me it wasn't true. That one day things would be okay, that I would be okay.

I fought those thoughts almost constantly, and I didn't need my friends treating me differently. That just substantiated the fears, and made it all the more certain that what we'd had before was lost. This was the first visit from any of my friends where I hadn't felt like a delicate object being observed. I felt like the old me, even if it was only for a little while.

I looked on as Cana and Gray continued good-naturedly fighting, pulling noses, pinching cheeks until Rogue had enough and chastised them, "That's enough, you two. Get some plates out and fix the sandwiches."

The two looked over at the stern man, then shared a laugh as Gray saluted him and said, "Yes sir."

"Okay Dad," Cana giggled, moving beside her cohort to do as she'd been told.

"What?" Rogue whirled around with a scowl on his face. "Can't you be serious for 5 minutes?"

Cana nodded her head, beaming at him. "Absolutely Pa!"

"Sure thing, Captain!" Gray choked out, enjoying the way Rogue's face was flushing with irritation.

"You two would drive a saint to sin," Rogue muttered, turning around to stir the soup again.

I giggled at the three of them again and shook my head. This was what I'd needed. This was the Fairy Tail I knew.

NATSU'S POV

My stomach was in knots by the time the train pulled into the station in Magnolia, everything I ate literally trying to climb up my throat to escape. I don't know if I'd ever felt as bad as I had during this trip. Of course, that probably had something to do with the fact that there had been no Lucy to distract me. No wonderful scent to calm my nerves, no lap to lay my head on, no delicate fingers running through my hair.

I suppose I had gotten used to having Lucy with me. No, the truth was I had gotten accustomed to Lucy, not just being by my side, but also taking care of me. I had come to expect it, and I was coming to understand that hadn't been a good thing. Going on this job alone had effectively brought home to me all the ways I had taken her for granted.

She was one of those people who went out of her way to do the little things for those she cared about. Like how she always saved a plate of food for me when she cooked, even when I wasn't there, or how she went out and bought an exact copy of Happy's favorite blanket to keep at her house. She made everyone feel like they mattered, and I had failed to notice all the ways she took care of us.

Now though, it was easy to see. It was glaringly obvious that Lucy had been the one that had kept us going as long as we had. I certainly hadn't made much of an effort towards the end, and then I had hurt her by moving on with another woman. It should have been Lucy leaving me behind because I sure hadn't deserved her devotion.

Sighing, I heaved myself from my seat, calling out to my friend, "Happy, let's go."

The little Exceed blinked sleepy eyes at me, before nodding and flying out the window with a yawn. I fumbled my way off of the train to meet him, stepping off far less gracefully than I would have liked, but what was important was being off that horrible contraption and feeling the steady ground beneath my feet.

Just that was enough to push the last of my motion sickness from my body, and I smiled in relief. Looking up, I found Happy hovered over my head, and I nodded at him. "Come on, buddy. Let's get this money to the guild."

"Aye! Lucy's rent has to be paid!" he shouted, throwing his little fist into the air.

I smiled at his determination as we walked toward the guild. It had taken a lot to convince him to come on this job with me, but once I had explained what the reward was for, he had jumped at the chance to help. He would do anything to help Lucy.

We made our way in companionable silence, and before long, my mind returned to thoughts of Lucy. I couldn't help but remember how things had been, the three of us on jobs, the formation of Team Natsu. Every mission had been an adventure, and I would be lying if I said I didn't miss it.

This last job had felt lonely to me, not because I only had Happy as company, but because I missed my other best friend. I missed the three of us spending time together. I missed Lucy complaining that I went too far with my magic. I just missed her.

Even now, everything felt wrong to me. I was back in Magnolia, only minutes away from Fairy Tail, and still, it didn't feel like I'd come home. It was all messed up, and I knew it would never be right again until Lucy forgave me.

Maybe it was foolish of me to hope we could be friends again one day. It was certainly selfish, considering what had happened, but I couldn't help it. I would always want her in my life, because I loved her.

It had taken me so long to understand the truth about my feelings for her and for Lisanna. I had believed I could move on with Lucy, and then Lisanna had come back. Seeing her again had been a miracle. I hadn't believed it possible, but there she was, the girl I had loved since I was a child.

Suddenly, everything I had dreamed of was right in front of me, and I didn't know what to do. I had convinced myself that I loved Lucy the way I had loved Lisanna before, but seeing Lisanna again, I knew it wasn't true. Without meaning to, I had used Lucy, and so I had tried to fix things, tried to correct my mistake.

God, I had screwed things up so badly, and now Lucy was hurt. Now, she hated me, and that killed me. I wanted to help her, to protect her, but I couldn't. I knew she wouldn't want me there, and I had to respect that.

Looking up, my eyes widened. I gaped, wondering how I happened to even now be standing in front of her house. With my mind occupied with the events of the last week, my feet had apparently taken me along our normal route, bringing me right to her.

"Natsu, what are we doing here? Are we going to see Lucy?" Happy asked, his tone confused but excited.

I shook my head sadly, knowing my answer wasn't going to go over well. "No Happy. It was an...accident coming here."

I looked up at her window, wishing I had the right to bust in there like I used to. She was so close, literally just on the other side of that wall, and I wanted so badly to be in there, taking care of her like she had done for me so many times. I wanted to be the one to protect her again, but she didn't want that.

I sighed again, turning away from the view to look at my Exceed. "Let's go to the guild, Happy."

"Aye," he answered glumly, slumping as he cast a final look at Lucy's house.

My chest ached as I watched him, and I felt ashamed. He shouldn't have to suffer because of what I did. "Happy, why don't you go visit Lucy. Here, take the money for her rent."

His eyes brightened as he took the hefty sack. "You don't want to come?"

"I...I've got...things to do," I muttered pathetically. I hated lying to him, but he should be able to go see Lucy without worrying about me, "I'll meet you at the guild later, okay?"

"Aye!" he announced brightly, flying off with a last shout, "Bye!"

I turned toward the guild again, unable to watch any longer. I didn't blame him for going to her. If I had been allowed, I wouldn't have wasted any time either. But it still hurt. My heart still ached with regret.

Brushing a hand over my eyes, I pushed the self-pity away. I had caused the destruction of our friendship, and I shouldn't be moaning about how bad I felt. Lucy was all that mattered now, and I would do anything to help her. I would be there for her, even if it was only in the shadows.

A/N: Just a quick note here. I know I've gotten far behind in answering my reviews, so I wanted to say I'm sorry, and even though there are some I haven't answered, I do appreciate every single one. I promise I'll be picking up from this chapter on, so don't be afraid to drop me a line. Thanks guys!