CHAPTER FORTY-NINE

(BPOV)

Two Weeks Later...

I knitted until my hands began to cramp and my eyes would no longer stay open. My head dipping down as I tried to fight off the seemingly endless exhaustion night after night. The truth was, I was afraid to close my eyes. Afraid that I would somehow miss Jacobs fleeting return if I closed them for too long. The past two weeks had been hell on earth for me. My nights sleepless and my days utterly empty without Jacob. I still couldn't keep much down and my body ached like I had the flu... the kind that wouldn't go away.

Billy had been nice enough to stay with us, offering his help and advice as often as he could. His company had been a great source of comfort for me.

"Come on, Bella. Why don't you lay down for a while. It's near dawn now. You haven't slept well in days." Charlie asked, taking the knitting needles from me with a look of concern.

"Okay." I reluctantly replied, dragging myself into the living room and curling up on the sofa.

"Well, I should get heading home, let you all get some rest-" I heard Billy quietly say to Charlie before sleep took me.

"No-" I protested, glancing up to them through heavy lids. "Please stay, Billy."

He nodded to me, his eyes full of compassion now. "Okay, Bella. I'll stick around for a while longer, dear. You sleep now."

I closed my eyes, feeling at ease that he was staying. Having him around reminded me even more of Jacob and I took some sanctuary in this small comfort.

I had no idea how many hours had passed when I awoke to the smell of bacon cooking, the strong aroma spreading through the house and making my stomach churn. I sat up, feeling overheated, sticky and uncomfortable as I placed a hand over my mouth and nose, trying to ward off the smell. I tore the blankets off me, trying to escape the stifling heat when Charlie wandered in to greet me with a grin.

"Well - look who finally woke up." He chuckled. "I'm making us some BLT's for supper tonight."

I shook my head, feeling the nausea intensify from just his mention of them. My head spinning as I tried to draw in a breath, my chest feeling so tight. I clutched Jacobs sweatshirt in my hands, trying to pull myself together. Charlie was quick to notice the paled expression on my face and he soon stopped talking, his hand touching my cheek urgently.

"You still look real pale, Bella. I think a good meal will help you feel bett-"

I covered my mouth again, pushing past him and barely making it to the kitchen sink before losing anything left in my stomach. My throat burned as I dry heaved, my eyes watering and my ribs aching from the force of them. Charlie had followed fast behind me, taking hold of my hair and holding it out of the way for me. I shook like a leaf, wiping my mouth and staring down into the sink as Charlie turned on the water and offered me a cool cloth.

"I don't like this, Bella-" He sighed, watching me closely. "Maybe we should go to-"

"No. I'm ok." I forced out, my voice raspy and my throat sore from vomiting so much lately.

"It's been days and you still haven't been able to eat much of anything-" He continued to fuss.

"Charlie, she just needs more rest. All this has worn her out. Give her some time to recuperate a bit. She'll feel better soon-" Billy interjected, handing me a tall glass of water. His dark eyes roaming over me as Charlie nodded in agreement.

"Alright, a few more days, but if you don't start getting better, we are headed to the doctors. I mean it, Bella. This flu has gone on far too long."

I took the water from Billy, drinking it down greedily, the coolness of it soothing my raw throat as I finished it off and set the empty glass on the counter. Charlie removed the bacon from the stove, trying to air out the smell of it by throwing open the kitchen window. He washed the dishes and insisted I sit down and take it easy while he cleaned up. I felt horrible, my head beginning to pound and my body sore and chilled to the bone. I pulled my knees up to my chest in the kitchen chair, seeing Billy hand me the heavy blanket I had used before.

"Thank you." I shivered, wrapping it around me and hating the fact that I couldn't seem to get truly comfortable. One minute I was cold and the next I was sweating. Tears stung my eyes as I tried to stop my emotions from getting the better of me, everything in me craving Jacobs voice, his strong arms, his comforting embrace. I wiped away the tear that rolled down my cheek as I stared out the kitchen window, my eyes scanning our yard for any sign of movement... any hint of russet fur glinting in the setting sun.

Billy placed a comforting hand on my forearm, his eyes meeting mine when I turned my head toward him. I saw the emotion he held back when he leaned in closer to me, his tone barely above a whisper.

"I know you're scared, Bella... I am too... but my boy has loved you since before he even really knew what love was and he will always come back to you. You are the home for his heart."

My tears fell as he wheeled himself closer, placing his arm around my shoulders when a sob escaped me. I hugged him, thankful for his support and kind words over the past two weeks. He had given so much of his time to be here for me and I loved him for it.

"I don't know if I'm strong enough for this, Billy." I shakily admitted.

"You are, Bella. I know you are. Sarah was just like you in a lot of ways and she wondered herself if she would make it through when I took off years ago, but she always did. It was her strength that pulled me through. I know I wouldn't be here without her. She was my saving grace - just like your Jacobs. The heart is a powerful thing. The love you two share is something that can conquer even the hardest of trials. I've known for a long time now that you were the girl for my son. The girl he'd marry one day, even when you were with Edward... even then, Bella... I knew you'd come around. Jacob is so much like his mother- when he loves... he loves with everything he has and he'll never walk away from it."

"Thank you, Billy." I replied, laying my head on his shoulder and seeing Charlie paused in the kitchens entry way, his tired gaze lingering over us.

"Anytime, Bella."

"I left you a sandwich on the counter if you want it, Billy." Charlie offered, glancing out the window and stilling his movements when he leaned in further, squinting to see something in the yard.

"Thanks, Charlie."

My father was silent, his hands coming to reach for the pair of binoculars resting on the table in front of us. I tried to stop myself from trembling, but I couldn't.

"See something?" Billy asked, tightening his arm around me as he turned his chair.

"Yeah..." Charlie huffed. "I can't make it out though - but something's there-"

I immediately jumped up from the chair, nearly falling into Charlie as I took the binoculars from him, looking out to scan the tree line in the back yard. I adjusted the focus on them twice, trying to make out what Charlie was seeing, but struggled to get a clear image.

"See that? Right there?" Charlie asked, pointing toward the largest tree that bordered the forest.

The suns rays touched it's wide base as I set the binoculars down, feeling devastated when I saw nothing there. I braced myself up against Charlie, my vision suddenly blurring as my head spun again. I swayed on my feet, making him take hold of me by the shoulders to steady me.

"Hey- Bella-"

"I'm dizzy, dad." I breathed, pressing my hand to my forehead as I tried to regain my balance. The room felt as if it was moving when Charlie sat me back down, his brown eyes wide with panic now.

"Take a few deep breaths."

"I can't-" I replied, feeling suffocated suddenly.

"Get her some more water, Charlie. She's probably dehydrated." Billy sighed, taking my hand in his.

I struggled to drag air in, my body feeling much too warm as I tore Jacob's sweatshirt off, leaving me in nothing more than a thin tank top and sleep shorts.

"I can't- breathe, Billy-." I gasped, clutching my chest and making a frantic run for the door. "I need some air."

Everything around me spun when I threw the front door open, the damp air hitting me in the face as I tried to take in a steadying breath, but I couldn't. I fell down onto the porch steps, feeling choked when I gasped again, my whole body shaking as a blazing heat settled over my skin.

I was slowly suffocating.

This was killing me.

The sky opened up and the rain poured over me, as I crawled on my hands and knees, choking and gasping for air. Body wracking sobs tore through me as I tried to just breathe. My very soul feeling as if it had been forcefully ripped out of me. Every inch of me physically ached for him and had for days. I let out a ragged cry, knowing that my body couldn't take any more of this. I pulled myself up, hearing a frantic Charlie coming after me. I stumbled over the porch steps, slowly falling down to the wet ground with another choked sob when a pair of warm arms caught me.

A/N: Okay all my awesome readers! Don't kill me! Another chapter is coming tomorrow! Please review and tell me your thoughts :-)