CHAPTER SIXTY-FIVE

(JPOV)

I had never seen Charlie truly angry. He was known to have his moments, but the clear anger on his face when he stared at me from across the kitchen told me he too felt my leaving her the way I did was a betrayal to his trust and it cut me deep. I met his heated stare, accepting whatever hostile glare he showed me and knowing it was deserved.

Bella didn't know where I had gone or why I had taken off the way I had and Charlie was only upset because of Bella's reaction and because of her suffering. I had known that leaving her so soon after returning was risky and I had tried my best to be back before she awoke, but my plan had gone to hell now.

"Where were you?" Charlie fumed, crossing his arms over his chest defiantly when he spoke. His voice all business now- all police and official in it's tone, like I were being interrogated for a crime I had yet to be convicted of.

"Charlie... I-..."

"Dad, please. It's not his fault. He didn't just leave..." Bella offered up, as she slowly pulled back from my embrace, wiping her tears and facing him. "I... panicked. When I woke up and he wasn't there, I just- thought - you were gone again, Jacob. Like before- not having you there - it scared me- and then when I came downstairs and didn't see you anywhere-"

I drew her closer to me again, seeing her tears well up once more as she tried to explain her reaction to him. Something I felt she didn't need to justify or explain. I had promised her I wouldn't leave her again- and I had broken that promise to her... knowing how fearful she'd been because of my last disappearing act. Her reaction was more than justified. I had left her for weeks before. She didn't know when or if I'd be back.

"I'm so sorry, honey." I replied to her in a whisper, seeing her red rimmed gaze meet mine before she turned herself further into me, resting her had against my chest. "Are you okay?"

She silently nodded to me in reply as my gaze wandered over to Charlie, whose look remained hostile as he simply shook his head in disapproval at her words. He was pissed at me for leaving her at all- no matter what the reason- and I couldn't say that I blamed him. I was having a hard time even forgiving myself for it. It wasn't long before Charlie stormed off, the door to the house slamming shut behind him as he went outside to cool off. I sighed heavily, feeling Bella wrap her arms around my neck as I pressed her body tightly to mine. Her small frame seeming to be even more breakable these days. She soon looked up at me with a fearful expression, her words whispered in a barely audible tone.

"I know you wouldn't have left me without good reason. Is someone hurt? Or worse even?" She asked, her eyes searching mine upon the last word.

"It's Rana. She's gone, honey."

Bella pulled back with a shake of her head in response to hearing this, her hands reaching for mine. "Gone? What do you mean she's gone? Where did she-"

"She died, Bella. It wasn't anyones fault, honey. She had abilities that weakened her and it took her life this time. There was nothing any of us could do. Billy called the council, but Old Quil was firm in his decision not to interfere on her behalf, but to let her go. I buried her by the river with Sam and the pack a few minutes ago."

"That's where you were?" She asked, seeing me nod in reply to her as I sat down at the kitchen table, the lump in my throat returning as the memory of digging her grave came back to me.

"Oh Jacob." Bella sighed, sitting down in my lap, her hands coming to cradle my face. "You tried to save her, didn't you? I'm so sorry."

I felt entirely unworthy of her understanding, given the panic I had carelessly thrown her into as a result of my leaving again, but she gave it to me anyway.

"I shouldn't have left you like that, honey. You have nothing to be sorry for."

"You're only one person-" She countered.

"Doesn't matter-"

"It does, Jacob. She meant something to you. To Sarah... of course you'd want to hold onto her if you could for that reason alone. I'm only sorry I didn't get the chance to know her better."

I nodded to her, growing silent as I thought of all the times Rana had told me how she had watched over dad and I. My heart was heavy for the loss of someone who meant so much to my mother, but I was grateful to have had the chance to spend what little time I had with her.

"She finally gets to be at rest where she grew up. It's for the best that way." I softly admitted.

Her gaze met mine with sadness as she leaned in closer to me. I captured her lips with my own, wrapping my arms around her as the sound of Charlie closing the house door made us pull apart. His loud footsteps causing us to rise from the table as I braced myself for his wrath. I felt Bella tremble in my arms when Charlie barged back into the kitchen, his words harsh with me.

"I asked you to look after her! I trusted you with that one job, Jacob! The most important one. You damn well know what she's been through! If I can't count on you to watch out for her when she needs you then-"

"Dad! Stop!" Bella countered, wrapping her arms around me and huddling herself closer. "He did what he had to do."

"I know, Charlie. I'm sorry-" I began.

"Sorry doesn't excuse your leaving, Jacob! I left for work at the station, assuming you were still up in Bella's room with her, only to get a frantic call from her an hour later saying she thinks you've run off again. You should have seen how upset she looked when I found her!" He shouted, throwing his arms up in the air in exasperation. Little did he know I had seen everything through the pack mind and just how that worked. I had already seen Bella's tears and heard her screams through Leahs mind and they were enough to send my insides ripping apart. I sucked in a sharp breath as the memory ran through my mind, my grip on Bella tightening in response now.

"You don't understand, dad! He has obligations to his pack-" Bella cried, her tears falling again from Charlie's anger.

"He has obligations to you!" He shouted to her in return, his heated glare meeting mine. "I'm going for a drive! I need to cool the hell off. Sue Clearwater is on her way over to be here with the two of you in case he decides his duty to his pack is his only top priority again! That way you won't be alone. I'll be back when I'm back."

He turned on his heel then, leaving us both in the kitchen without uttering another word.

"He's wrong, Jacob. He's just angry. He doesn't mean it-" She cried, burying her face in my neck as I held her.

"He has a right to be angry with me, honey. I let him down and I let you down. I allowed Rana to offset my priorities and I shouldn't have done that. It wasn't right. When I left you- before- when I wasn't myself, I couldn't control it. This I chose and I chose wrong, honey." I replied, taking her by the hand and leading her into the living room with me.

Bella was silent as we sat down on the couch, her eyes appearing tired to me still, despite the sleep she had just woken from. She was still trembling, whether from the cold or her emotions, I couldn't be sure but I hated the sight of it.

She was the most important thing to me.

"I'm sure I look a mess." She sighed, running her fingers through her long hair as I caught her hand in mine.

"No- You're beautiful honey... always."

I moved her over next to me, feeling her head come to rest on my chest and her fingers lace with mine.

"You are my first priority, Bells... forever."

A/N: Another chapter update will be posted this evening. So look for that later. Thank you for all the kind reviews! Till next time...