I took down two more deer before I felt satisfied. I was beginning to have even more appreciation for the Cullens and what they put up with every day having me around if this was how I felt around animal blood. I couldn't imagine having something better smelling strutting around and not being able to drain it dry. Of course, I knew that I would gain better self-control the longer I was a vampire, but I appreciated them nonetheless.
By the time I made my way back to Carlisle and Esme using my new and improved sense of smell I was self-conscious all over again about the blood soaking my clothes and, admittedly, parts of my hair. I shouldn't have expected any less, but I was greeting with smiles and tender looks anyway. We began the run back to our house so that I could clean up. I smiled as I got lost in my own thoughts. Our house. When had I started calling it that? That didn't matter, though. What did matter was that I knew it was the truth. I wouldn't call anywhere else home again without the Cullens.
A high-pitched noise broke me from my daydreaming. I looked around a bit frantically in an attempt to figure out what the noise was. I nearly laughed when I realized that it was just a cell phone until I saw the look on Esme's face. It looked like she would throw up on spot if that were possible. Panic took over her features as she stood frozen, staring at the screen. Carlisle moved to her side and gently took the device from her hands, making eye contact with me as he lifted it up to his ear.
"Edward," Carlisle said. I suddenly understood what Esme was feeling. How could I have put the rest of the family – my fiancé – out of my mind so easily? I felt a crushing sense of doubt as I waited to hear my favorite sound come from the other end of the phone. What if he was disappointed? What if he left again when he found out what had happened? All of the hard work put into our relationship to regain trust after our months apart seemed on the edge of falling apart as I felt what must be venom fill my eyes. Of course, all of this happened within a matter of two seconds with the speed of my vampire brain, but even that was a long pause for one of us.
"Carlisle, what the hell is going on?" Edward's muffled voice came through the speaker. Carlisle shut his eyes and sighed, surely sensing the anger and disbelief in his son's tone. "Carlisle, please. Alice had a vision and we don't know what it means. I'm worried." Calmer, but still demanding.
"Edward, I know this isn't what you want to hear," he started, "but I think you need to come home to see what's happened." I thought I could hear a frustrated groan.
"Is she okay, Carlisle?" The pain in his voice could have shattered my heart. I was next to Carlisle in an instant, begging with my eyes to speak to him, knowing he wouldn't fully believe anything that didn't come straight from me.
The small shake of his head told me enough. I knew that Edward would be able to tell what I was if I spoke to him, but it was worth a shot. I turned to Esme and pulled her into a hug, unsure that I could stand hearing the sadness and worry coming from the person that I loved more than anything or anyone without doing something to fix it.
"Yes, she's fine. In fact, I think I can say with 100% positivity that she'll be the first face you see waiting for you when you get back. She's anxious to see you." Carlisle sent me a small smile. I nodded, agreeing with him whole-heartedly. I could feel Esme running her hand through my hair, soothing me as her husband finished the conversation quickly.
We ran silently toward our Forks home. I knew the next few days would bring terrible pain as I had to break the news to Edward and decide how I was going to go about removing myself from the lives of the humans that I loved. However, even knowing this, I still couldn't bring myself to be upset about becoming an immortal.
I thought through how Edward would react about a million times before the sun began to rise the next morning. I reminded myself to breathe, no matter how unnecessary, when I heard five pairs of feet running through the forest a few miles away. With only a brief flashback to what had literally landed me in this position a few days prior, I descended the stairs to greet them.