Title: Expectations; or The Obligatory Winter Veil Episode
Description: Sylvanas and Li Li visit the stables, and later go on a very important mission.
Notes: First off, and once again, I'd like to apologize for the lack of updates. I just haven't been in too much of a mood to write. There was also a chapter before this that I was writing, but I felt like that no one would really understand the context or the references going on, so I shelved it; however, I can always reconsider. So to compensate for my absence, here's this extra long chapter inspired by Lunara and the Winter Veil trailer.
Notes2: Insert shameless plug here: I've also gotten around to doing a bit of fan art in regards to this story. You can find a couple pieces under my handle, Fantastic-Phoenix, on Deviantart.
Notes3: One time on the MFPT chat in Heroes of the Storm, people were talking about shipping. I mentioned that I ship Sylvanas/Nova. Right away someone comes back to me with the respond "HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK?" Oh, but I can. I can. If there's a way, I'll make it happen. And I have too much fun teasing you guys.

"…Well," Li Li said after the silence dragged on long enough, the word forming on a vapor of white smoke before evaporating. "This is…disappointing. I kinda expected it to be…you know, an actual cloud, and not, uh—"

"That?" said Sylvanas.

"Yeah. Exactly." They regarded the floating piece of hexagonal tile, one of boredom and one of dismay. The words CLOUD9 was embossed beneath the logo of a cloud, drawn in the curlicue manner of three number nines, but other than that and the blue trim around it there was nothing too impressive about it. Simplistic, if one could see that kind of artistic value in it. "I mean, it has a good design, but that's just it. It's too hard. It needs to be soft and fluffy, like a real cloud! If the sponsors are going to commission a mount in their name, it should at least look the part!"

"A shame it doesn't have any spikes to dig into somebody's ass." That was one thing she could appreciate about Horde architecture (and, reaching further, the designs of the Gilneans and her own folk): they had plenty of spikes to go around. She had thought them ugly and unsightly, too tribal for the likes of a fanciful lady such as herself, but then the Siege of Orgrimmar happened and friend and foe alike were impaled with extreme prejudice upon the pointed ends of blockades, ramparts, battlements…goodness, Garrosh put them everywhere. It was an even bigger pity that nearly everyone suddenly became a bleeding heart in the span of sixty seconds and put him on trial instead of, well, taking a spike and ramming it through that oafish brain of his. Or maybe egg Jaina on with that newfound hate of hers and have her put an ice pick in his heart, or maybe his eyes; Darkness, his eyes were so piggish. How could he stand to eat boar when he looked and sounded like one—

"Well I'd rather a spike doesn't dig into anybody's ass! Not even a mule's! No one deserves that kind of discomfort!" Li Li said firmly. "It's Winter Veil. Come February, this thing will be off the market. Collectors from all over the Nexus will be hounding us celebrities for even just a scraping of the engine's nanomolecular paneling!"

"Better that than your fluffy cloud. They would get nothing but cotton balls."

"Yet you ride on colorfully vibrant goat refugees that fart glitter and rainbows. GLITTER and RAINBOWS, Sylvanas," Li Li emphasized with a shake of her hands.

"I don't lose bets in Hearthstone. That's why Illidan's dead in our default sector."

"Hey, I don't know about that. Call it a gut feeling."

"Then he should be better more prepared, don't you agree?"

"I bet you ten gold he'll surprise us one of these days. Or, at least the Illidan that wasn't taken into the Nexus."

"That's a conversation I will not indulge myself in. Leave that to the bronze dragons. Oh wait, they can't. Thank you very much, Thrall!" Sylvanas mumbled this last under her breath, lips pursed and shaking her head.

"Well, anyway, back to our topic: if people can ride on goats that are commonly mistaken for cartoon ponies, they can ride on clouds," said Li Li. "There's this story I heard way back on the Wandering Isle about Son Wukong, the Monkey King. Apparently a long time ago he was given the Kinto'un, the Somersault Cloud, as a gift from the Celestials after making a journey from the Jade Forest to the Dread Wastes and back on foot during a time when the mantid were making their attempts to go over the Serpent's Spine. Others say he already had the cloud, but that he was only allowed to ride it when his quest was complete. Master Shang Xi used to say that thing was really fast and could cover great distances in a matter of minutes. The only drawback was that only the pure of heart could ride it."

Sylvanas hummed appreciatively. "That's very convenient. If it's that fast and there are many more like it, the Forsaken could spread blight and destruction and conquer Azeroth in a heartbeat. They would be unstoppable!"

Li Li stared at Sylvanas as though she had suddenly sprouted a second head. "Let me repeat that for you: you have to be pure of heart."

"Well of course the Forsaken are pure of heart. They have the best intentions."

"For themselves."

"Indeed. Would you not consider that pure?"

"Uhhh…." Li Li glanced to the left, then to the right up at Sylvanas, who glared back at her, stared at the snow between her feet, to which she shuffled them and kicked the smattering of flakes off. She brought up a fist, coughed into it, and rubbed her hands together. "Well then. I suppose we better head back inside and warm up. It's pretty cold out here."

"Oh you're telling me!" said a female voice. "What I wouldn't give to be by a fire right about now!"

Sylvanas and Li Li looked down the row of the pens and saw a four-legged creature sitting on her haunches. Her lower body resembled that of a spotted deer. Her upper half, however, was more humanoid and night elven, with wide amber-colored eyes, long foliate ears, and a long shock of green bedecked in snow, leaves, and thorny brambles; Sylvanas so desperately wanted to call it a weave, especially since the creature wore an expression of outright displeasure and had her teeth clenched together, presumably to keep them from chattering.

"Holy moly! A talking deer!" Li Li exclaimed, and she pelted down the aisle to get a better look.

The deer-lady scoffed and tossed her head back, shaking loose a powdery white shower from her antlers. "I am not a deer! How would you like it if I called you a tailless skunk, or a wild dog?"

"Oh, that's old hat!"

"Yes, and at your age you wouldn't be able to keep it on," said Sylvanas, coming up behind Li Li. "A coat rack would do a better job than you keeping an old hat together."

"And the hat will always look better than you," said the woman. She harrumphed, turned up her nose, and flicked her tail, but the air around her was thick with smug triumph; she did not need to see the Banshee Queen glowering at her, but she did hear the bamboo umbrella snap shut with a vicious click. "Anyway," she resumed, regarding her guests. "I am not a deer. I act nothing like a deer. I am a dryad. I am Lunara, the First Daughter of Cenarius. I am also the latest Hero to be called into the Nexus."

Sylvanas snorted. "Who would've guessed?" Li Li smacked her hip with the back of her hand.

But Lunara nodded. "Indeed. Who would've thought that I, a child of the gods, would be mistaken for a peasant's mount and be held against my own will in the muck and filth among the more base variants of the animal kingdom? They even tried to put a saddle on me! A saddle! I am not like those druids who like to go into stag form and offer free rides around Darnassus, you know!"

"That's terrible!" said Li Li.

"I know! The water tastes like eggs, the food is bland and mixed with chemicals, and there's simply not enough space for me to gallop around in! I want freedom! Clean air! Organic sustenance! And a mortal to run my spear through for the injustice they have brought upon me!" She snatched the carved bough from the ground and shook it once at them.

"We're immortal," said Sylvanas. "We don't stay dead in the Nexus."

"Then damn my stiff, cold and weary hooves, I will simply go on a rampage until my vengeance has been sated! And if I should die I will come back and do it again! And again! I will not be treated in such a manner!"

"Hey now, there's a better way to go about this!" said Li Li. "It's bloodless, too! Sylvanas and I will go to the administrator's office and explain the situation. He'll see it was a mistake and fix it in no time—"

"Or you could just go on that rampage," Sylvanas interjected, ignoring the look of chagrin the panda girl sent her way. "Look, let's be real for a moment here: for being the daughter of a demigod, you sure like to complain a lot. Hear me out," she added, silencing the outrageous protest ready to fly from Lunara's lips. "They made a fool out of you. So long as you sit here, they're going to keep treating you like some circus animal. Seize your destiny, Lunara! Make an example of them ten times over until they see the error of their ways!" She shrugged nonchalantly. "After all, we're stuck here indefinitely. You may as well make the most of it, for what it's worth—"

"IT SHALL BE DONE!" Lunara cried, and bounded over the gate in a single, graceful leap that would put a basketball player to shame. She lashed out behind her with her back hooves and knocked the fence down, then reared up on them and kicked the air with the front, stabbing the spear's point at the wintry downfall. Sylvanas snatched Li Li by the shoulders and pulled her back, narrowly avoiding being struck. She was about to take off when she paused. "Oh, and just for the record," she said, looking at Sylvanas, "this was my idea. Not yours. I was totally not inspired, whatsoever."

Sylvanas nodded, lips thinned. "Right. You were biding your time. Gotcha."

"I mean it! Your rousing speech didn't do any wonders!"

"Then you better get a move on, then, before someone makes leather out of you."

"Or humble pie!" Li Li piped up.

"Oh, I will humble these fine folk tonight," Lunara growled. "Tonight, they dine not on pie or meat but on the BLOOD OF THEIR FOLLY!" She galloped off, kicking a backwash of snow and ice in their faces. Li Li sputtered and wiped her face clean of it while Sylvanas, ears flattened against the sides of her skull, huffed and shook her head like a wet dog coming out of a bath.

Coming around the corner toward the stables, there came the sound of orcish laughter. Rehgar appeared, dressed in a red suit and hat, overly large yellow gloves and boots. A beard made of feathers spilled down his chest, accentuated by the plastic red ball planted squarely on his nose. He hauled a sack full of toys and goodies across his back. "HO HO HO! What seems to be all the ruckus about? Winter Veil is a time to be gay and merry! Whatever vitriol you may, you should save it for later—"

"OUT OF THE WAY, GRANDPA!" Wood flashed in a blur and struck Rehgar upside the face, knocking him off his feet and bowling him over onto his stomach. The sack fell in a rustle and a jingle. Lunara ignored him and kept on going, her tracks the only sign that remained of her passing.

"Rehgar—I mean, Greatfather Winter!" Li Li cried. "Are you alright?"

Rehgar picked himself up off the ground. With the back of his hand he wiped his mouth and saw that the material was covered in a strip of blood. He sneered, and a dangerous light entered his eyes. "Yes. Yes, I'm fine, little girl. Greatfather Winter has suffered worse than this."

"Yes," Sylvanas drawled sarcastically, "poor, ole Rehgar. How scoured your pride must be to be sucker-punched by a dryad of all things."

He clenched his teeth. "No, little girl, this has nothing to do with pride. Or double standards, for that matter!"

"Who the hell are you calling little—"

"This," Rehgar continued, pulling off his gloves and throwing them to the ground, "oh this! Somebody's just got herself a heaping full of coal for Winter Veil…and so. Much. MORE! Ho! HO! HO!" He tore the beard from his face, yanked off the hat, leaped forward and transformed into a ghost wolf; the bulb on his nose glowed so bright and so very, very red. In the dark and whiteness of the land, it was a homing beacon that raced further and further away from them.

And as Li Li and Sylvanas watched and listened, toward the lights and sounds of festivity. Soon there were shouts, cries of surprise, glass breaking, wood snapping, gunfire popping, thunder crackling, magic exploding, and the guttural roar of a hungry, angry Stitches. Somewhere among all that, Chen and Brightwing laughed, one drunkenly and another maniacally. "YES, YES!" cried the faerie dragon. "More HELLFIRE! More MAYHEM! MORE, MORE, MORE!" As if on cue something exploded, followed by an elephant's distressed trumpet; they could barely hear Gazlowe shouting for Peanut to come back before it dissolved into a litany of vicious swearing.

Li Li and Sylvanas looked at each other, and then looked back into the darkness. They stayed like that for a while until the chaos receded and silence returned to the pens.

"Well," Li Li began, shifting from one foot to the other, "that was…uh…."

"Ridiculous," Sylvanas finished for her. "Don't look at me like that," she tacked on at the annoyed face the panda girl sent her way, "it was either that or continue being miserable. Personally I hope she gave Rehgar a good sticking through; he's so into his role I'll bet you he thinks he's Greatfather Winter himself. Not like that troglodyte of an abomination is any better…."

Li Li turned away, shaking her head. Her eyes fell upon the discarded sack. "Hey! He forgot about the gifts!" She plodded over to them.

The Banshee Queen snorted. "Leave them. If he's not too lost in bloodlust, he'll remember and come back for them. If not, someone will notice and take them someplace else. It's none of our concern."

"It's a bit wet, but at least nothing fell out," Li Li murmured under her breath, pawing at the sackcloth material and poking at the shaped lumps of gifts here and there. Satisfied, she got to her feet, turned around. Looked Sylvanas Windrunner square in the eye and, steeling herself, smacked the top of the sack. "Sylvanas, how do you feel about performing a Winter Veil miracle?"

Her ears quivered, lifted slightly. "What?" she said, as flat as can be. Then, as realization dawned on her: "No. Out of the question."

"Come on, Sylvanas!"

"I said no!"

"You saw what happened! Rehgar and Stitches will be too busy respawning at the Hall of Storms. It's up to us to finish the job! All the little boys and girls of the Nexus, the nobles and the peasants, the Heroes and the Villains, are counting on us to bring them joy and cheer!"

"Then you can go right on ahead!" Sylvanas waved her away dismissively. "I want nothing to do with it! What do I look like, that stupid elf on a shelf?"

"With the way you're acting, yah-huh!"

"Ugh, you're insufferable!" Sylvanas put her back to Li Li. "Go ask the other Sylvanas! She's lame enough to oblige to your request and do whatever you please!"

"She's probably dying out there, too!"

"Then go ask someone else! Anyone, for that matter! I don't care who it is as long as it doesn't involve me!" She bore up the umbrella and snapped it open. "Now, if that's been settled, I bid you good night, Li Li Stormstout!"

She had not gotten several steps in when Li Li called out, "Anybody I want, right?"

"That's right!" Sylvanas called back.

"Then I guess you don't mind if I invite all the girls. You know, Jaina, Valla, Kerrigan, Hammer, even Nova. We'll all pile up in Hammer's siege tank and we'll blast the presents out one by one. Well, after we play a few rounds of jankenpon and the catfighting's out of the way. There's always the risk of hitting the wrong button and, uh, blowing up another building again, like you did with the stables—whoa!"

She was hauled off the ground and into the air, her feet kicking lamely against the ranger's sternum. So she found herself staring into a frosty crimson glare, folded ears, and a ragged scar across the pale blue skin of her nose. Her heart thrashed against the ball of Sylvanas's fist, where it gathered the front of her tunic. "Are you challenging me?" she hissed, pushing her pointy nose against Li Li's wet, black, round one.

She stared cross-eyed at her. "Challenge? What challenge?"

"For someone who's never had, let alone fought, elves on the back of a massive turtle, you sure talk big."

Li Li chuckled. "Well, I do have a big heart."

"My aim is true," Sylvanas said, jostling her prey once. "It's always true. What happened before? An innocent mistake on my part and a colossal error of judgment and lack of brain cells on Hammer's. And let me tell you, it will not happen again." She jostled her twice more.

"So does that mean you're gonna help, after all?"

"Help you? This is merely a means to an end. I don't do miracles."

"Not in the eyes of everyone on Greatfather Winter's Nice List."

Sylvanas heaved a world-weary sigh and closed her eyes. "Just…don't bring the others. For Darkness's sake." She opened her hand, dropping Li Li like the forgotten sack lying in the snow. She walked back and picked up the umbrella she had tossed aside.

On her back, Li Li clenched her fists and pumped her arms in the air. "Yippie! But, uh, before we do that…."

Sylvanas rolled her eyes. "What?" she groused, looking back.

Li Li sat up and shook off the powder and ice coating her clothes. "We gotta look the part."

Silence.

Sylvanas stared at her. "Hah?" was all she could manage.

"Something festive," Li Li posed. "Something bright. Something colorful. Something that'll draw the eye and make 'em think 'so Greatfather's helpers do look as they do in the stories!' Something like…"

"Uh…this." Li Li backed away from Sylvanas as fast as she could and didn't notice she bumped right into the cashier's desk. The few customers doing last-minute Winter Veil shopping ceased their activities and turned as one (or, rather, they turned as their dread allowed them to without risk of painful death) toward the Banshee Queen.

Sylvanas bared her fangs in a nasty sneer back at the reflection in the mirror. Forgoing the armor and weaponry befitting her station, she wore a long red dress with swirling gold filigree patterns; the trim along the cleavage and hips were fluffy white wool bedecked in mistletoe and tinsel. A fat black belt and buckle cinched the ensemble together. Her sleeves and stockings were white and striped in an obnoxiously loud shade of green, and her hands and feet were covered with gloves and floppy boots topped with jingle bells. At the sight of the large plastic wings shedding glitter and Darkness-knew-what kind of child-friendly crap all over the floor with every flutter, along with the bow made from one massive candy cane leaning up against the glass, her ears flattened against hair stylized into ringlets and curls dyed a luminous gold.

Slowly, timidly, the cashier inched up to Sylvanas, the object in his hands rattling in a miniature earthquake. As steadily as he could make his voice sound, he said, "Ahem. You, um, forgot this." He all but threw the red Winter Veil hat on her head before dashing to his counter, stumbling, and rolling over the surface in a mad jumble of limbs; Li Li sidestepped him just barely and winced at the sound of his fall.

She approached her much more bravely but just as cautiously. "Hey, it's not that bad. I mean, I think we complement each other quite well: I as your cute-as-a-button helper, and you as the sexy, eternally long-legged Greatmother Winter, who's come out of the workshop to assist Greatfathers Winter on this holiest of nights…depending on where you stand on the religious spectrum, that is." The image in the mirror glared at her. "No, really, given your condition you've still got back."

"I look like a child's play doll," Sylvanas snarled.

"But you're a very pretty doll!"

"…who belongs more on a pinup calendar than on a mantelpiece. I believe there's a term for that in your culture—Lolita, wasn't it?"

"That's because you see yourself that way."

"It's all about the sex appeal! No one wants some burly, shirtless orc or a rotting amalgamation of mismatched skin and bones going around delivering gifts and coal unless it's steeped in Nexus tradition! They want a woman who's got the body, who's got the looks. It doesn't matter if she's alive or dead so long as she has the aesthetics to get the job done!"

"You're dressed pretty conservatively, but hey, if we go by that logic we'll be filling out the niches and appealing to the masses who crave cute and cool. It's marketing ingenuity! I mean, just look at me!" Li Li squeezed around to stand in front of Sylvanas and posed herself at the mirror. Sylvanas scowled down at her. At least she looked the part of a helper, in suit and pants adjusted to her size. The hat didn't come off as ridiculous and her hair fell in a low black fountain compared to the usual high ponytail she sported. Bracelets and wooden bangles inlaid with bells hung from her wrists and a big green ribbon in the shape of a bow tied the clothes together.

She…did look cute, actually.

But one look at the mirror, at her reflection, and reality set in. What the hell was she getting herself into? She would rather spend the rest of the holiday season locked away with a yarn to read, preferably one where people died left and right and the world had little to no hope of recovering; and if it did it got wrecked again, all for her amusement and those of the fictional, cosmic variety.

Why did she always get involved in these things?

The bell over the entrance rang, signaling the arrival of a new customer; and at this everyone in the store jumped with a start and whirled to see who it was.

"Hey, where's the music?" Nova asked, kicking the snow off her boots on the welcome mat. "It's so quiet in here!"

Sylvanas's eyes bulged. The cashier quickly ducked for cover under his desk.

The fear and anxiety thickened. At the far back, among a row of cosmetics and jewelry, a few shoppers fell to their knees and began to whisper fervent prayers.

Li Li lifted a hand in greeting. "Hey, Nova. Happy Winter Veil!" She couldn't have said it more nonchalantly.

"Likewise! Say, I didn't know Greatfather Winter had helpers this year," Nova said, nodding to Sylvanas. "She's cute. Who might you be?" She crossed her hands behind the small of her back and leaned forward; too close and, in Sylvanas's opinion, way below where a person should be looking at when addressing another.

So she grabbed her by the chin and yanked her eyes up to her own. "It's me, you dumbass!"

Nova's jaw unhinged. "No way…Sylvanas? Is that really you?"

"No, I'm the tooth fairy," she scoffed.

"I'll say! Change the coloring and the patterns to something more hygienically appropriate and you could be the poster child of a multi-million gold toothpaste brand!"

Sylvanas rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes. Save me your prattle. Oh, by the way, your scarf's loose." Around Nova's neck was a pretty red and green croqueted scarf with crystalline snowflakes and pinprick stars decorating every third stripe.

"Oh? Is it?"

"Indeed. Here, let me fix that for you." Sylvanas placed her hands around the ends of the scarf hanging over Nova's chest. She undid the failing knot and with swift, graceful movements redid it. Then she pulled, hard, causing a choked, chicken-like squawk to erupt from Nova's lips. "There. Better?"

"Y-Yes," she rasped. "Thank you."

Li Li sighed and put a palm to her face, shaking her head. "Anyway, how's the night treating you?"

"Fine and well. Just mostly stopped by to warm up; mighty nippy out there. What about you? What brings you two out this way? Figured you'd be partying it up; well, before the random deer showed up and starting trashing the place."

"I don't know what you're talking about," said Sylvanas, feigning ignorance.

"Greatfather Winter's hopped up on bloodlust because the deer beat him up," said Li Li. "He left his bag behind so Sylvanas and I decided it'd be up to us to give him a helping hand."

"I hope that's without Stitches's hook," said Nova, "and if by any chance it does, I hope it's thoroughly sanitized."

"No hooks. We have the bag ready and we're dressed for the part, but I was thinking we're going to need a mount to seat the both of us and the rest of the stuff. Do you think Hammer will let us use her siege tank?"

"Please," Sylvanas groaned, "anything but that. I would rather ride the goat refugees than overshoot my target with the shock cannon." And demolish the stables again.

"I don't think you'll be able to," said Nova. "Last I checked, Hammer was getting, uh, busy getting hammered over at the punch bowl. If you could call it that, that is. Most of the animals and reindeer should be asleep right now in the barn, so your best bet would be to check the garage."

"The only other vehicle I can think of that we could use would be the Vultures, but those are one-seaters," said Li Li. "They wouldn't be able to accommodate all the weight."

"Well, now that you mention it, there is one mount you could take it."

"What is it?"

"Some sort of flying chariot, like that Cloud9 tile. At least I think it's a chariot, but without the wheels; that's what it was registered as on the dashboard computer. Border patrol from the Cursed Hollow found it smoking inside the Haunted Mines. They managed to haul it out and bring it back to the Chop Shop to repair it. 'S all well and good now, but we haven't been able to track down the owner. Well, what they don't know won't hurt them. It's pretty big, so there's enough space for you to put the stuff off to the side. I have the code for the start-up sequence if you want to use it."

Li Li clapped her hands. "Would we ever! But…the bag's awful big. If the chariot's as big as you say it is, then there'd only be enough room for one person to drive it. And, well, I'm, uh, not of legal age, so that means…."

Sylvanas huffed tiredly. "There's no point worrying about the details. You take the Cloud9, I'll take the chariot. We'll split the gifts fifty-fifty and get moving once we have everything assorted."

"Then that's settled!" said Nova. "You're going to rock that chariot, Sylvanas. Your outfit reminds me a little bit of it, so you'll definitely stand out."

Sylvanas stopped in midstride. Glancing over her shoulder with the bag draped over the over, not to mention in that outfit, no one could take the sinister, challenging expression quite seriously…but then again, none dared to outright say it. "What do you mean 'stand out'?"

There was a buzzing as Nova inputted the four digit code, and then foot by foot the metal garage door lifted and clanked open, receding on its rails into the mechanical darkness above. At her side, Li Li and Sylvanas caught their first full look of the so-called chariot parked at the leftmost corner of the garage, away from the siege tanks of Bama "The Hammer" Kowalski, the Hammer of War World III, and Grimina Doomhammer.

The bag fell from Sylvanas's limp hands. "Are you kidding me," she said dully.

Nova shrugged. "Well, it's not exactly festive for this particular holiday, but I'd say its design does this nighttime setting wonders, don't you agree?"

"I'll show you 'wonders'," Sylvanas drawled, and made to draw the dagger from her hip sheath.

"Wait a second!" cried Li Li, clapping a hand around her wrist and shoving her body between them. "Has anyone tested it out since it was fixed?"

"I gave it a quick run not too long ago," said Nova. "Trust me, this baby can fly. We're talking up to at least two-hundred kliks on the speedometer if you're not flooring it. I bet you, if someone were to place bets on who'd win a race between Falstad and whoever's driving this thing, I'd put my money on that person."

"Yes, but only if it was Sylvanas. Anybody else and you'd put your stake on Swiftwing, even if he was losing."

Nova's face and ears burned. "Th-That's not true! It…It really depends on who's behind the wheel! Really!"

"Heh, sure you do." Li Li grinned. "Man, you should look yourself in a mirror. You don't even need a scarf to keep warm!"

"Sh-Shut up!"

"I can't believe I'm going to ride that," Sylvanas told them. She did not sound thrilled. No, not at all.

"Think of the children, Sylvanas!" said Li Li. "The adults! Their pets! There's no greater joy to Winter Veil if they don't have presents to show off to everyone else!"

"And here I thought bragging rights was the antithesis of what Winter Veil was all about."

"It's only one aspect!"

Sylvanas blew air from her cheeks. "I'll tell you what: I'll give you my license and have you drive the chariot—"

"No way I'm getting a black mark on my record."

"It's just for one night. I know someone in the Underworks who makes counterfeits for a living—"

"Uh huh. Forget it. My record's going to stay as clean as Johanna's knick-knack collection. Besides, you're the Banshee Queen! What harm is driving a chariot fit for a magical girl anime's going to do to you?" Li Li huffed and put her arms akimbo. "And here I thought you had brass! Hmph, I guess I was wrong!" She lifted her nose and tossed her ponytail with a flip of the hand.

Sylvanas peeled her lips inward, revealing gum and fanged teeth at her. Then her features relaxed, settling for a scowl. She tugged on one end of Nova's scarf. "Where's the code for the start-up?"

"It's in the office," she said.

"Go get it."

"You mean you're going?"

"Yes, Nova. I'm going."

"Then can I come with?"

"I don't care, just go! Before I change my mind!"

"Ooh! Let me get changed first!" Nova tore away from her, pelting into the garage where her footsteps yelled and echoed. She vaulted over the hood of the War World tank and disappeared around the bend.

"You're doing a good thing, Sylvanas," said Li Li, nodding approvingly, proudly, and maybe a touch smugly that she got her way. "I know in the deep, dark recesses of that rotting, necromantic carcass, your heart feels the same way, too."

"Put a sock in it." Sylvanas retrieved the sack from the ground, bore it across her shoulders, and began plodding across the floor toward the chariot. Li Li tagged close behind her. "If I were alive, I would already be in a diabetic coma. I can only imagine this will be the last of the tomfoolery I will have to put up this night."

"No. I was wrong. IT WASN'T!" She had to yell over the roar of the wind and the music on the dashboard PC. She clung onto the handles of the chariot, the three large stars on its front end blaring loud and purple in the clear dark night. The afterimages it and the Cloud9 tile trailed in their wake like the glassy glimmer of the sun on a lake. Nova clung to her like a parasite, breasts flush against her back, one arm slung around her waist, the other holding a smaller sack of gifts beside her. For a brief instance she had to wonder how the hell she wasn't freezing her tits off, what with being dressed more…freely, flashing all that skin and legs. She could've at least brought a cloak; her own lack of body warmth wasn't going to make her any more comfortable than she probably already was.

From the loudspeakers, the lyrics crackled and fluctuated in and out in static quality:

"Who's that, look,
Flying higher than a bird,
SAILOR! SAILOR MOON!
She's got a life in the sky
And another here on Earth.
SAILOR! SAILOR MOON!

She's got her cat, Luna,
Who gives her advice.
She's so fine,
So stand by her side!

SAILOR! SAILOR MOON!
SAILOR! SAILOR MOON!"

Nova tossed her head back, laughing in her ear. "This sounds so nineteen-ninety-eighties!"

"Well your nineteen-ninety-eighties music is absolutely atrocious! They couldn't have come up with anything else better than this simplistic garbage?!"

"NO!"

"Not every magical girl show got systemically butchered by corporate bigwigs and had a corny opening theme song, you know!" Li Li called out. Riding next to them she had the rest of the gifts in her own bag and a wrapped present held aloft, ready to be tossed into a waiting chimney.

"Prove me wrong then!" said Sylvanas.

"Okay! When we get back!"

"I see some houses up ahead!" Nova shouted, jabbing a finger Sylvanas had to duck under at the approaching rows looming steadily over the horizon. "Step on it, Sylvanas! For the children!"

"For what little remains of my sanity!" Sylvanas grumbled, and pressed down on the pedal. The chariot rattled and then rocketed past Li Li on a burst of speed.

"Hey, wait up!"