Author's Note/Public Service Announcement: The bit about seatbelts and Liz's recollection of the number of dead people she's had to cut a seatbelt off is based on my Dad's experiences as a Fireman. He constantly says he never cut a seatbelt off a dead person, but they had to call the coroner many times for folks who didn't have their seatbelts on. Just sayin'.

Chapter 004

Behind Their Masks

Friday, December 03, 2010, 8:45 a.m.

Outside the Salvatore Boarding House

Freya, Finn, Henri and I watch while Bonnie cries into Kol's chest. My heart breaks for the pain my granddaughter has suffered, both at the hands of her father and from her knowledge of and participation in The Supernatural World, as well as from her having received that premonition. No one should have to watch their friends meet horrible deaths, even if it was just a potential future and not their actual fates.

A few minutes later her tears have turned into sniffles, so she pulls away. Kol brings his hands up to her face, and with a gentle smile on his own face, he cups her cheeks before brushing away her tear tracks with his thumbs even more gently, far more gently, than my baby girl would have previously given him credit for being capable of.

Smiling softly at her, Kol nods slightly and then steps back breaking the moment. Immediately wishing he hadn't broken it so soon Bonnie pauses and then asks herself, 'Why should I care that he broke the moment. It doesn't mean anything even if I maybe wish it did, which I don't.'

I laugh and say, "Oh Baby Girl, you didn't even stand a chance."

Finn smiles and tells me, "Our brother didn't stand a chance either."

I nod and watch the pair try to find their way together. Lord knows they're going to have trials in their life together, but I believe the two will make the other stronger and be each other's support when they can't be strong on their own.

After he breaks the moment, but before Bonnie can say anything and voice her opinion that this meant nothing, Kol holds out his hand and says, "Give me your keys, Darling."

Without stopping and thinking about it, she reaches into her purse, pulls her keyring out, and obediently drops it into his waiting palm. Using the key fob, Kol unlocks the doors and then takes Bonnie's hand and turns her before he walks them both towards the passenger side of her car. His hand is rough in hers, and she figures the calluses rubbing against the soft skin of her palm are the result of his having worked hard to survive while he was human. She's not wrong.

She comes out of her thoughts about Kol's human life when the object of her thoughts opens the car door and helps her sit down. Closing her door, he walks back around the car before opening the driver's side door. Getting into the vehicle, he adjusts the seat to make room for his long legs. Once he's situated and satisfied with the seat's position, my granddaughter looks at him with wide eyes and asks him, "Kol, what…?"

Henri, Finn, Freya, and I think ourselves into the tiny back seat with Henri sitting on Finn's lap while Kol frowns in the front seat and tells my grandbaby, "You're too upset to drive just yet, so I thought I'd drive."

Despite her recent upset she smiles slightly and asks, "Do you even know how to drive?"

Kol chuckles and pockets her keys and then expertly pushes the power button starting the car. At his action, she thinks, 'Um, yeah, it's not weird or anything that a vampire who's been locked in a coffin for the last almost 100 years actually knows how to turn on my very modern Prius.'

He smiles and tells her, "Yes, we did our best to be very modern and forward thinking through the years, so I actually learned how to drive using a Model T back in early 1909 mere months after the first one came off the assembly line."

Henri chuckles and says, "I remember that. He almost hit a vegetable cart in the market… twice."

Finn chuckles back and tells us, "That's nothing, Rebekah actually ran into Niklaus."

Henri turns and looks at his brother with wide eyes, "Oh man, I missed that?"

Finn smiles gently and tells him, "You were too busy avoiding me."

Frowning Henri tells him, "I didn't want to get attached and used to you being around when it was possible you would be undaggered."

Nodding Finn says, "I know. I understand, and I forgive you. I might even agree with you, but that is why you missed Rebekah hitting Niklaus with his new automobile."

Henri nods and tells us, "God, I wish I could have seen his face when she ran into him."

Smiling widely, Finn tells him, "It was quite the sight."

Kol meanwhile tells Bonnie, "Elijah was extremely helpful and introduced me to modern automobiles when I was released from my coffin this time. He even took me aside in the weeks after my siblings and I were revived and taught me how they work as well as the rules regarding driving in this day and age."

She thinks, 'He learned how to drive in a Model T?'

He looks at her sitting beside him and grins before he says, "Using the forged documents he had drawn up for Rebekah and me after we were undaggered we both even went and got our licenses last month despite the dangers Esther was causing and our heartfelt desire to upset those threats. And before you ask, no, neither one of us compelled a passing score out of the man administering the road test, despite how tempting it was to just do it the easy way and be done with it."

Bonnie is still stuck on the fact that he learned how to drive in a Model T. He pauses, though he seems not to notice her distraction. His grin gets wider before he says, "I figure I'm immortal and not very likely to die, so I have plenty of time to do it properly and not cheat."

My granddaughter's brain is stuck, 'A Model T?' Still she giggles at his words, but her eyes are wide when he faces forward, puts on his seat belt, and then turning only his head looks at her and tells her, "Best put your seatbelt on, Darling. It wouldn't do for me to get pulled over for having a passenger not properly secured, even if I could simply compel the officer into forgetting he even pulled me over in the first place."

She nods and quickly puts her seatbelt on for two reasons. 1., she never goes anywhere without her seatbelt on. That's mostly because Liz continually tells her, Caroline, and their friends that in her two decades as a police officer she's never actually had to cut a seatbelt off a dead person. She finishes the story by telling them that she has had to call the coroner to come to get countless people who weren't wearing a seatbelt at all. 2., Bonnie doesn't want Kol compelling anyone unless it's absolutely necessary. Because she can make it not happen by wearing her seatbelt, she doesn't argue and just buckles the belt in place.

He nods with a pleased smile that shows his straight, very white, blunt human teeth before he turns his face forward again and pulls out of the driveway. Meanwhile, Bonnie's mind once again goes back to a single fact: 'He learned how to drive in a Model T? Holy Cow! I mean theoretically I know he's over a thousand years old, but for some strange reason the idea of him learning how to drive in one of the first cars ever mass produced, well that strikes me as odd, or maybe odd isn't the right word, but it definitely strikes me as something out of the ordinary.'

She pictures him in a proper suit from the times with a long coat, top hat and driving gloves, which rips a giggle out of her causing him to look at her out of the corner of his eye. The question, 'What are you giggling at?' is written all over his face with his narrowed eyes and pursed lips, so she calms her giggles and tells him, "Sorry I was just picturing you driving a Model T in the clothes of the time complete with driving gloves and top hat." She pauses and then sheepishly tells him, "Sorry, it seemed funnier when it was in my head. Ignore me."

He smiles a soft smile. Turning his face to look at Bonnie for a moment he then looks back at the road before he says, "The Derby or Bowler Hat as it was known in Britain was more to my liking at the time. Honestly, it was more to most everybody's liking at the time." He pauses then continues by telling my granddaughter, "Well, except Nik and his adopted son when they went to the theater. Regardless, I'm sure the apparel from back then seems comical to you now just as the apparel from this time seemed comical to me when I first saw women with skirts that barely hid their interesting bits. Don't get me wrong, I thoroughly enjoy the view in most cases, but it was rather jarring and silly looking in some instances to my ancient tastes."

He pauses again and then with a smile firmly on his face he confides in Bonnie and says, "I actually miss the brief glimpse of ankle I would search for while at court or a ball and the thrill that little flash of flesh would give me."

His smile turns into a grin before he tells my granddaughter, "Back then there was much more left to the imagination. I think that's why men today are so very bored and so very lazy."

He glances at her out of the corner of his eyes and then tells my truly fascinated grandbaby, "A lot of women, not all of them mind you, but enough, don't bother with propriety and let the men they encounter know all the secrets that used to be hidden by layers of fabric. Men no longer have to work for that privilege, and it's led to a generation of lazy boys who wouldn't have survived five minutes even one hundred years ago never mind when I was born."

Bonnie thinks, 'Um wow, the old-fashioned styles don't seem comical to me at all. More so they seem romantic and timeless.' However, it never occurred to her to stop and consider how strange and utterly foreign the fashion of this time would seem to someone who had last been out in the world 100 years ago. 'Maybe I should reconsider how I dress because I don't want to show it all.'

He's not done talking, though, so she smiles slightly when he tells her, "Now there are some, you for instance, that have managed to walk the incredibly thin line between modern sexy and trashy. Your outfit today is a prime example of how some women, and, in my opinion, far too few of them, still manage to make us guess what your interesting bits look like. Oh, you entice us, for sure, but you don't overstep the line despite the new less strict rules defining propriety."

I agree. Bonnie tastefully walks the line without going over it like so many women in this day and age. Henri, Freya, and Finn are nodding too.

Kol continues telling my still thoroughly interested granddaughter, "That shirt you're wearing is a perfect example. It's cut in a manner that compliments your curves but entices me to want to know more about what's underneath without giving away all your secrets with just a glance. Your friend, Ms. Forbes, tends to successfully walk that line too, and even Ms. Gilbert, as loathe as I am to admit it, manages to keep it tasteful."

Thinking, 'Okay, maybe I don't have to rethink my fashion sense then.'

Bonnie giggles when he says, "Some of the girls I've seen when I've picked my sister up from school or dropped her off in the morning just made me shake my head because technically in this day and age they're not yet considered adults. Yet they were showing far more skin than the whores ever showed three hundred years ago, and they were in the business of selling their bodies, so the gentlemen they came in contact with needed to know what they were procuring for the evening. Therefore, the women left little to the imagination. I'm still shocked your generation manages to show even more skin than the whores of previous generations and the world at large thinks absolutely nothing of it."

Finn is nodding deeply and wholeheartedly agrees with everything his brother just said, and so does Henri who is nodding as deeply as his oldest brother. Henri nods twice more just before Kol frowns slightly and tells my granddaughter, "Modern fashion, for the most part, is one of the things I find myself shaking my head at when I see what's now considered acceptable. Honestly, I usually wish for the old dresses and the emphasis on necks, shoulders, and upper arms and that ever elusive flash of ankle if I were lucky enough to catch a glimpse of it."

He pauses and then grinning slightly he tells her in a soft, nostalgic voice, "Don't even get me started on how much I miss the intricate hair-dos of the past and how much fun untangling them truly was. It used to be the only men who ever saw a woman's hair down were the men of her family, such as her father or her brothers and/or her husband or in my case the vampire who seduced the woman out of her very pretty ball gown."

Finn chuckles deeply when Kol says that last part while Bonnie giggles before Finn tells us, "He has seduced a fair number of women out of their gowns that's for sure. Perhaps even more, per time not daggered, than Niklaus has in that same period. Don't get me wrong, though, Kol was far pickier about the women he spent his time and attention on than Niklaus ever was. Still, Kol definitely got around before he converted to Christianity."

Kol waits a moment for Bonnie's giggles to die down then he sighs and says, "I really do miss the mystery that used to surround women. Nowadays it's all out there for anyone who cares to see it to do so without having to put in any effort."

My grandbaby pictures herself in one of the many ball gowns she's seen Elena in, and the intricate hair-dos Elena and Caroline have been known to wear to the town's many balls and wonders what Kol would think if she dressed that way. 'Not that I'm usually invited to the balls, or not the fancier ones anyway.'

Shaking her head, she thinks, 'What do I care what he would think of me all dressed up in an old-fashioned ball gown? Get a grip, Bonnie!'

She blushes then she once more shakes her head to rid it of those thoughts and flips down the visor in front of her. Looking at her face in the mirror, she uses her thumb to push away the very slight smudges her crying caused. A smile breaks out on her face when Kol cuts his eyes towards her and with a genuine smile says, "You look beautiful, Darling."

Finn smiles again and tells me, "She really does look beautiful. She has glowing skin that looks flawless from where I'm sitting. Her hair is shiny and well managed, though not overstyled like so many young people have the tendency to do. Her outfit compliments her skin tone and her lovely curves that even I have noticed even though she is unknowingly spoken for by my brother." I raise my eyebrow at him, so he gives me a cheeky smile I'm beginning to realize is a Mikaelson family trait and tells me, "I am a man after all, and she's a stunning woman, Sheila."

I just smile because my baby girl is beautiful. Bonnie says nothing, but thinks, 'It's always nice to have a hot guy tell you that you're beautiful and while he's possibly, maybe, evil the fact remains he's sex on two legs. He's H-O-T-T-N-E-S-S personified, in fact.'

Her smile at his words is genuine. However, she squares her shoulders before she silently promises herself, 'I will not crush on the 'Happy Homicidal Maniac.' I just won't do it. It's a bad idea any way I look at it,'

I chuckle and tell my companions, "It's already too late. The fact that she's warning herself of what a bad idea it is means she's already doing it."

Henri giggles and tells me, "It's the Mikaelson charm. The ladies just can't resist my brothers. Look at Bonnie's friend, Caroline, she's been trying to resist Nik, but he's slowly wearing her down until he can wiggle his way into her heart. Your granddaughter, all due respect, doesn't stand a chance against Kol."

I lazily bob my head at the same time Bonnie nods at her reflection and orders herself, 'I will not crush on the hotter than hell thousand-year-old bad boy.'

She repeats that to herself once more, 'I will not crush on the hot as hell thousand-year-old bad boy vampire. No matter how pretty he is to look at or how happy a simple smile from him makes me I will not crush on him. I will not fall for his boyish charms. I will not melt on the inside when he graces me with one of his handsome smiles. I will hold in my girlish giggles when he flirts with me, and above all else, I will remember that Damon is probably right, and Kol has probably, okay almost certainly, killed more people than I've ever met in my entire life.'

Pausing her silent rant, she then shakes her head before continuing, 'Never mind that the same could be said for Damon and Elena ignores it. Kol is a killer, and he's made no attempt to hide that fact so I will remember the countless people he's killed, and I will not fall for him. I won't do it.'

My grandbaby nods at herself again while she looks in the mirror and reassures herself that she won't 'do something stupid like fall for Kol Mikaelson.' Then she smiles at the fact that her makeup is mostly intact, so she flips the visor back up and sits back, but when we get to the turn to go towards the school, she frowns because Kol flips the wrong blinker and turns in the opposite direction of where she thinks we should be going. While being mindful that he's supposedly the least stable Mikaelson she cautiously tells him, "Uh, Kol, the school is the other way."

He nods with a slight smile on his face that she thinks looks nicer than it has any right to and says, "I know, Darling, but I don't think you're quite ready to face the masses, do you?"

Bonnie frowns and looks sideways at the vampire behind the steering wheel while he drives her little white Prius farther away from school before asking him, "So what is this? A sympathy kidnapping or something?"

A Sympathy Kidnapping? Henri, Finn, Freya, and I burst out laughing at that. Kol chuckles too and tells himself, 'I'll have to remember that and tell 'Bekah.'

I may not have known Rebekah for as long as I've known Finn and Kol, but I know she'll get a good laugh out of that. It's in line with something she would say in this sort of situation.

While Kol laughs, my granddaughter can't help but smile because little laugh lines appear around his eyes before he tells her, "Something like that, Darling. Your heart is still hammering in your chest, and you're still trembling ever so slightly, so I don't think you're quite ready for school just yet, especially if Ms. Gilbert is present. Therefore, I thought I'd take you out for coffee and let you settle yourself first."

He's serious too. Her limbs and core are trembling which is clear to everyone in the car when she raises her hands in front of her face. She puts her hand to her neck next, and she discovers that her heart is thundering away as though she's running a marathon. Until Kol mentioned either fact, she hadn't noticed either thing. However, her frown deepens. She's wondering, 'Why does Kol care whether or not I'm upset?'

Ordinarily, he wouldn't if it were anyone other than his chosen mate. However, it is Bonnie, so he cares very much about what she's feeling and how she's responding to the things happening around her. She's young and vulnerable, especially right now given all that happened with Atticus. Although she does a decent job of hiding what's going on with her from her friends, especially now that I know about her father's treatment of her, Kol sees through the mask enough to realize it is just that, a mask she wears. She's slowly but surely falling apart, and Kol very much so intends to put her back together and then help hold the pieces together so that they can heal.

She has no clue, though. So far as she's concerned, at this point, Kol's tried to kill her at least once and his family, if you want to call Esther that, which at this point I don't, is the reason her mother is now a vampire. By her way of thinking she's tried or threatened to kill Kol back, so she turns and looks at him before she asks, quite a bit more rudely than he would ordinarily accept from anyone other than his chosen mate, "What do you care if I'm settled or not?"

Bonnie frowns as soon as the words are out of her mouth. She realizes a moment too late that she asked that more tactlessly than might be wise when dealing with the Mikaelson brother that Niklaus, of all people, has publicly called his family's 'Happy Homicidal Maniac.' She thinks about that for a minute, 'Klaus thinks Kol is a 'Happy Homicidal Maniac.' Coming from a man I know has no qualms about killing anyone he pleases if it suits his purposes, well I'm certain that says something, and I'm also not sure that that bodes well for me right now.'

I believe Finn's explanation from earlier about how the moniker is less about how happy Kol is killing people and more about shoving his face in his enormous guilt, after the fact. Other than daggering them, Niklaus has extraordinarily little recourse when it comes to controlling his siblings. It's why, according to Finn, Henri, and Kol, himself, the hybrid has daggered Kol seven separate times for a grand total of about four centuries in his coffin.

I figure it's the same reason Niklaus left Finn daggered after The Five daggered them all almost nine centuries ago. Finn wasn't following his brother's rules, and according to previous discussions we've had Finn spoke once too many about leaving the family and traveling on his own.

Conversely, I believe Kol was smarter than Finn even back then and did not make his mistakes. They all told me their stories while they were daggered. Honestly, there is little else to do here on The Otherside than reflect and reminisce. So, I know that as soon as they turned, Kol fled. Mostly he was, I believe, trying to get away from the reminders of what exactly he had lost because of his parents' plan. When he was with his family and grew restless, which he has tended to do, he rarely commented that he was contemplating leaving for a time and instead just disappeared in the middle of the night. He always left most everything behind, and only the fact that his siblings were incredibly careful about taking with them or hiding anything he left behind either when he disappeared or when he was daggered kept him from having next to nothing. In fact, out of all of them, Finn thinks that Kol has more belongings than anyone else in his family except Niklaus who has, unlike the rest of them, been awake the full 1,009 years since they transitioned.

However, most everyone believes that their family spent the last thousand years fleeing Mikael, and while that is true, it is also true that his siblings spent a good chunk of their time chasing after Kol while trying to simultaneously keep Mikael at bay.

Still, by Kol's own admission he hasn't caused an unwarranted bloodbath since 1821 when he was grieving and reacted poorly. When he was awake between 1900 and Christmas of 1914, he hardly killed anyone, with a few notable exceptions who threatened or harmed those he cared about. The point is if we believe him and his siblings, and I think we should, Kol hasn't been that homicidal maniac in some time. In fact, other than trying to get revenge on Niklaus by killing as many people as he could in his anger and pain back in the 1820's he stopped killing indiscriminately back in the late 1690's when he met a woman who taught him how to control his temper better, for the most part anyway. She instilled in him far more than he feels he ever showed her and this last time he woke he resolved to be the man she knew he could be not the monster he was when not trying to control his anger or jealousy.

Still Bonnie doesn't know any of that, so she's wondering, 'What on earth was I thinking getting into a car with him?'

While Henri, Finn, Freya, Kol, and I know that he's not actually a threat to her, quite the opposite really, so far as she's still concerned he's a genuine and extremely dangerous threat to her and her friends. She shakes her head, and then she physically braces herself preparing for a worst-case scenario because he's now frowning with stiff shoulders. He's very obviously unhappy when he flips the turn signal again with a little more force than strictly necessary and turns at the light. Taking a deep breath and slowly releasing it, he forces himself to calm down lest he scares her or worse angers her and burns a bridge he very much so needs not to burn.

His voice is a little hoarse, but there is no bite to it when he tells her, "Darling, I know my family has not been… well, 'kind' is probably the wrong word, but we have hurt people dear to you. You need to understand that most of that was in defense of or seeking vengeance for ourselves or another member of our family."

Stopping, her eyes roll around in her head while she replays every time Kol or one of his siblings attacked or otherwise harmed her or her friends. She sits up straight when she realizes he's right. He and his siblings have only attacked her group with potentially lethal force after they've been threatened or attacked themselves. The only exceptions are Niklaus and the Sacrifice to undo the curse placed on him all those centuries ago by Esther and then the ensuing battle for Elena's blood that resulted in Jeremy almost getting hit by a car, and Finn's unwilling role in Esther's plans that would have led to all vampires everywhere dying.

I suppose you could make the argument that Kol attacked them unprovoked, but I've heard enough while on The Otherside to know that Silas is not just a tale told to scare young children. He's very real and a bona fide threat to the security of the world at large and the safety of The Otherside. Therefore, if they released Silas from his slumber, Kol and every other living creature, not to mention every spirit on The Otherside would have been at risk, so technically Kol's actions were really in defense of himself and the rest of the world.

Kol glances at Bonnie quickly and then looks back at the road before continuing his point, "If you think about it, even Nik killing the mayor was a direct response to his insipid first hybrid setting my brother up to be attacked by his hybrids. By the way, that was incredibly stupid any way you look at it because even if they weren't sired to him anymore, they were still descended from him, and killing him would have killed them too. Regardless, if the insufferable baby hybrid hadn't tried to mess with Nik, then his mother would still be alive."

While I certainly doubt my granddaughter condones Niklaus' actions, he wouldn't have acted that way without Tyler, hot-headed brat that he is, acting out first, and, honestly, I doubt that Bonnie, as moral and decent as she is, really condones Tyler's actions at all either. The teen nods her head slightly, and her shoulders relax slightly. Her thoughts tell the four ghosts in the car that she does blame Tyler for his mother's death more than she blames Niklaus for it even if it was The Original Hybrid who held Carol's head under the water until she stopped struggling.

Kol frowns slightly and then adds, "Then if you also consider The So-Called Sun and the Moon Curse, technically Nik was attacked. Yes, technically it was over a thousand years ago, but he wasn't the one who set it up so that he needed to kill three people to return himself to his full self. Our dearly departed mother did that, and while I know you weren't happy that Ms. Gilbert was in danger, I overheard you talking to Ms. Forbes a few weeks ago right before I left for Denver. You told your friend that you understood once you knew the truth of the curse that he'd want nothing more than to remove those shackles our mother placed on his wolf side over a millennium ago. You told her that in your opinion Esther was in the wrong in that case, not Nik, and you cautiously admitted to your friend that if you could have figured out a way to help him without killing Ms. Gilbert, then you would have. So, I know you fully understand exactly what happened in that situation and exactly who was to blame for that whole mess."

Her eyes are wide open, but she nods slowly, so he tells her, "You may also blame Finn for your mother becoming a Vampire. However, what you don't know about that is that Esther used a witch's compulsion on him when he was a toddler, and I suspect she did it a second time after we were revived in October."

Kol pauses with a frown firmly on his face then he softly confides in the teen witch, "I spent just over four centuries with him on The Otherside, so I know to my core that he would not have tried to harm any of us without Esther forcing him to do so. I just wish my memories hadn't been so jumbled and I had realized what was happening before he died. Not that there is much I would have been able to do to help him because if the witch is unwilling to remove the compulsion only the death of the witch or the end of the person being compelled could remove the compulsion. So, there would have been little any of us could do to help him other than kill Esther, which we were already trying to do, but I still wish I remembered what she had done when he was a child sooner.

Her eyes are wide, "She compelled her own son to help her kill her children, his own siblings?"

He nods and tells her, "Yes, I know Finn well enough to know that that's the only reason he would have tried to harm us. Yes, he never liked what we became, honestly neither did I. And yes, Finn often called our actions monstrous, and I'll admit he usually wasn't wrong either, but he would never try to kill any of us or anyone for that matter. In his mind doing such a thing would make him just as guilty of monstrous actions as the rest of us were. Furthermore, the unknown vampires out in the world minding their own business that would have died if our entire family died would have stopped him from trying to harm us even if his love for us wouldn't, which I think it would have. No, he would not have risked the death of some random vampire that isn't a monster, not even to right the balance. To Finn, righting the wrong our mother committed a thousand plus years ago would not be worth risking killing even one innocent person, vampire or not."

Kol briefly looks at Bonnie sitting beside him for a moment before bringing his eyes back to the road in front of him and then says, "Although Finn was unhappy as a vampire after Esther died the first time he was fiercely loyal to all of us despite his disapproval of our behavior. Therefore, I'm certain nothing he did once Esther revealed herself to us was of his own free will. I remember that night clearly. He was the soft-spoken but fiercely loyal and always loving brother I knew after our turning and on The Otherside. Then shortly after she walked into the room, she asked to speak to him alone. I don't know why he went, probably to confront her, but I have no doubt in my mind that that's when she did it the second time."

My granddaughter nods so he tells her, "Back to my point, really the only time any of us attacked your group of our own free will without us first being attacked by someone was when Nik regrettably tried to have Jeremy hit by a car to get Ms. Gilbert to do what he wanted and give him her blood."

After pausing a moment to let her contemplate his statement, my grandbaby reluctantly nods before he tells her, "We're not all that different than you and your merry band of warriors. We have those we love, and they are our everything. We would turn the world inside out and upside down to protect or avenge them. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you and yours have essentially done the same thing."

Everyone in the car, Bonnie included knows he's right. She and her friends, well everyone except Elena, anyhow, would all move heaven and earth to protect each other. I mean Jeremy allowed Kol to cut off his arms to save the rest of them from certain death, and Kol's family is the same way. That is rightly so too because nothing is more important than family whether it's by blood relation or the family of your heart.

Kol smiles slightly and tells Bonnie, "Aside from the fact that I am about one month over 1,029-years-old and a vampire who has killed many people, you and I are not all that different. I didn't miss the part when you were speaking with Damon, and you said you killed the professor."

She flinches at that, and I can see in her mind that every time she has a slow moment and the freedom to think about random things the feeling of Atticus' life slipping away invades her thoughts and plays on repeat in her mind. In those moments, she conjures up memories of happier times, everything from sleep-overs with Elena and Caroline when they were younger to talking about witchcraft with me more recently. No matter what she tries to think about, though, in the slow moments, her mind always comes back to the feel of that predator's life stuttering to a stop because of her.

Kol knows she likely does not currently trust him enough to discuss the finer details of Atticus' death, though. So, he continues as if he didn't notice her reaction to his words though she knows he did, in fact, notice, "He was in police custody and alive yesterday afternoon when I went looking for him, so that means you killed him last night, probably after you and I parted ways. So, you can't even use the fact that I've killed people to differentiate us because apparently, you're willing to kill too. If I asked you why you did it, I wager you'd say it was to protect your loved ones and the world at large, the very same reasons I attacked you and your friends last night."

She nods for a moment but then shakes her head before responding with a bit more attitude than she genuinely has any right to display. However, we all realize it's a very touchy subject for her. Kol knowingly touched that nerve, so he grits his teeth and holds back his own anger when she hotly tells him, "Even if I admit that you're right about my reasons and yours, I killed one person to save my loved ones and the world. How many people have you killed? Because I'm willing to bet my sizable trust fund that most of your victims weren't out to destroy the world or your family."

Kol's muscles tense. Despite what she and her friends think he doesn't enjoy killing people. In fact, if he could make it so that he had never killed anyone and never will again, he would do it in one of Bonnie's fast little heartbeats.

Her shoulders are tense too, and she has wide eyes, and her mouth is forming a little 'o' as if she's surprised by her own words, and maybe she is. She's obviously waiting for him to explode all over her. If she were anyone else, he probably would. However, instead he just frowns before he glances at her for a second or two, and then he looks back at the road and says, "I will admit that I have killed probably far more than my fair share of innocent people. To answer your question, I've unfortunately killed approximately 333,446 humans and about 1,516 werewolves, maybe 3,318 vampires, no more than 237 witches, though most of those witches attacked me or mine first. Regardless those are the numbers give or take a dozen or so of each in my 1,009 years as a vampire."

My baby girl's hazel eyes widen, and her thoughts are clear, 'He actually counted? Talk about sick.' She opens her mouth to say something rude when he intercepts her and says, "And before you ask, yes I kept track the best I could because it felt wrong to kill them and then just forget them as if their lives had no meaning."

Now her eyes widen, and her jaw drops, 'Whoa, that's not why I thought he was counting.'

He continues to show her just how wrong her shallow and negative thoughts about his behavior truly are by telling her, "I even have books with the names of the ones whose names I knew or could figure out written down. That way so long as I am alive someone remembers them and the fact that I, more often than not, unjustly took their lives long before they were probably meant to die. I mean I don't recall ever killing a child or a pregnant woman, so most of my victims fell somewhere between your age and your father's age with a much smaller percentage between your father and your grandmother's age groups. Few were particularly old even if only because most humans didn't live to be much older than 30 or 40 back when I was born. In fact, if I had been human and not a witch, I would have probably already been more than halfway through my short life when our mother turned us."

Kol glances at Bonnie sitting beside him and at the frown she's sporting he tells her, "I didn't just kill to kill, not really. I always had a reason, even if it was a particularly poor reason. With very few exceptions I felt horrible about the violence I perpetrated as soon as it was over, and I'd had a chance to calm down. Before turning, I had an incredibly short fuse compared to the rest of my family and fact of the matter is most of the deaths I caused after I turned were me trying to acclimate to life with increased emotions and an out of control bloodlust that reacted to those increased emotions with a hairpin trigger. In addition to that, it was also me trying to acclimate to life without my magick, the loss of which just exacerbated my newly heightened emotions as well as the sensitivity of the hairpin trigger."

He pauses and takes a deep breath before he continues and tells her, "You don't have your magick right now, so I'm sure that you can understand just how jarring and unsettling the experience was and still is. For the record, I was a prodigy, so it was the major element in my life from when I was about four or five autumns old, and then suddenly it was stolen from me."

Bonnie's head that had been facing forward whips around and looks at him when the word prodigy passes his lips. Her eyes are wide, and she purses her mouth while she repeats his words in her mind. She frowns. If she's honest with herself, she will admit that she probably would have killed people too if she were immersed in her magick as much as Kol was and for as long. Even if she does admit it to herself, I still know that she'll never admit that out loud, but I also know it's still true.

Kol is 1,029-years-old, and he's been a vampire for 1,009 years, which means he was about three weeks shy of 20-years-old when they turned. He had access to his magick for more than fifteen years because he began using magick regularly when he was around four years old. Because he was a prodigy that means that what he could do at each milestone was much more than the average witch would have been capable of too, so he felt the loss of his magick that much more deeply. If she had been in his exact position, I can't guarantee she wouldn't have reacted the same way, and I'm sure she wouldn't be able to ensure it either. In fact, I'm inclined to think she would have reacted exactly the way he did. Now, that knowledge is only on her peripheral, so she hasn't admitted it to herself just yet. That self-awareness she's been developing of late does not please her, but I think she's at the point in her life where she won't lie to herself about who and what she truly is. She's not perfect, and I think her experiences with dark magick have brought her to a place where she's slowly admitting that to herself, even if she is still unwilling to admit it to anyone else at this point.

If you throw in the bloodlust, and the fact that his magick was such a significant part of the original's human life, and then suddenly it was just gone and no longer accessible to him, she can understand why he reacted the way he did. If she's brutally honest with herself based on her own reaction to losing her magick this last month, I think if she were in his shoes she might very well have reacted even worse than he did.

According to Finn, Kol once had a witch offer to use dark magick to try to return his magick to him, and he flat out turned her down despite how badly he wanted his magick back. He wasn't willing to touch the dark to do it, though, and although I know Bonnie didn't realize what Atticus was teaching her until it was too late, I'm also confident she wouldn't have been able to pass up the opportunity, or at least not currently. When Kol finishes teaching her, she will never have any desire to touch the dark ever again, and she will not only know better than to try but she'll actively work to avoid using it.

She's frowning when Kol continues, "I admit I reacted poorly, but I have mellowed over time. I was also serious about not handling boredom very well. I really do get into all sorts of mischief when I'm left without something productive to do, and while I realize that's a terrible excuse to have killed people I didn't exactly have the best role models growing up, so it's taken me longer to set myself straight as it were. I mean you met Esther, but did you ever meet Mikael?"

Her mouth opens, and words come out, but I'm not sure it's willing on her part. Still, the words hit their mark and remind him that he is far from perfect, "It's more than a terrible excuse it's inexcusable. You killed innocent people because of boredom? That's monstrous."

Kol bobs his head up and down slowly, and everyone in the car knows that Bonnie wouldn't have done that no matter what the circumstance might have been.

She's still frowning though when she shakes her head in the negative and says, "I never actually met Mikael, but I've heard about him from multiple sources."

He nods and tells her honestly, "Consider yourself lucky then. The man spent our human lives toying with us and beating us into submission and then spent the next thousand years toying with us while he hunted us, his own children, and slaughtering whomever he felt was necessary to get to us all because he didn't like that we chose Nik over him."

Her mouth opens again, and words come out once more, and I'm sure she wasn't planning to say them, but she does all the same. They bring Kol, and I'm sure Finn and Henri both, a bit of comfort that she understands a little of what he and his siblings went through with Mikael, "God, I can't even imagine how betrayed you all felt when Mikael began hunting you. I mean your own father wanted you dead, and if you're to be believed, and I see no reason that you would lie about this, it was because you all sided with your brother over your abusive father. No one should be made to choose between family members whether they're abusive or not."

She doesn't quite understand the enormity of what they went through when they became vampires, though, so she's frowning deeply before Kol glowers and tells her, "None of us except Mikael asked to become vampires."

Her jaw drops for a second before it snaps closed, and she quickly asks, "Wait, he asked to become a vampire? Clearly, I missed that part of the story. He actually asked for it?"

Kol, Finn, and Henri all frown and Kol looks at her briefly before bringing his eyes back to the road, and then he nods and asks, "Have you not heard the story of how we came to be vampires? I assumed Ms. Gilbert would have told you and all of your friends everything my sister told her about that time in our lives."

My granddaughter frowns back and tells him honestly, "Elena told me the very broad basics. She didn't really want to talk to me about it because I very strongly and loudly disagreed with her decision to dagger your sister not even taking into account the shitty way she went about it. So, she only told me that your mother did it in response to someone close to your family dying in a werewolf attack."

The four Mikaelson children present and I all smile when she says she disagreed with Elena's actions. Finn tells me, "Our sister already told Kol of a conversation she overheard, so we already know that both Bonnie and Ms. Forbes strongly disagreed with Ms. Gilbert's actions."

That conversation Rebekah overheard was not the first of its kind, nor was it the last, so I know just how displeased my grandbaby was with her friend's actions.

Kol's frown deepens, and he shakes his head when she mentions why their parents turned them, so he tells her, "That's not even the bare basics because it completely overlooks the fact that the someone close to us was our younger brother Henrik."

Her eyes widen significantly, and she hurries to tell him, "Oh God, I'm sorry. I didn't realize, or I wouldn't have brought it up so casually."

I know she wouldn't have said it that way if she had any idea who exactly had died, and so does Kol, but then we all smile slightly when she pauses and then adds, "I'm sorry for your loss."

Kol nods and tells her, "Thank you. Anyway, long story made slightly shorter, Henri was the youngest of us all, and he was fascinated by the wolves who lived in the village next to ours. We would ordinarily spend the full moons underground in the catacombs that still to this day wind through Mystic Falls, far beneath the ground, to steer clear of the ravenous wolves, who unlike the recent hybrids did not retain much if any of their human minds while in animal form. Therefore, even those we were friendly with the rest of the month were a genuine threat to our safety during The Full Moon. The last full moon before we turned, Henri convinced Nik, who was, like all of us, wrapped around our youngest brother's little finger, to take him to go watch the wolves shift. My understanding is that a late shifter got a little too close to Henri while shifting and gravely wounded our brother. Nik carried him back as soon as it was safe to do so, but it was too late, and Henri died a few minutes later in Nik and 'Bekah's arms."

Kol pauses and takes a deep breath before slowly releasing it, and then he continues his story, "Nik obviously blamed himself and still does to this day, and Mikael wasted no time making sure Nik knew that he blamed him too. Henri's death more so than Esther's is why Mikael wanted to kill Nik and, therefore, the rest of us."

Freya, Henri, and Finn are nodding at his words. Kol pauses again, but then he tells Bonnie his thoughts on his brother's death, "Nik had a hand in Henri dying, no question about that, but it wasn't his fault, or at least not entirely his fault. Henri pestered him for days before he agreed, so as much as I hate to say it Henri is more to blame for his own death, and I know for a fact that he knew and fully understood the dangers because a wolf mauled and killed another man from our village only a couple months before Henri died. However, Henri was Mikael's favorite, so the arse blamed Nik entirely because 'poor, perfect Henrik' couldn't have possibly done something he was told not to do without 'that worthless boy,' Nik, inducing him to do it."

Henri is nodding deeply. Apparently, he agrees with his older brother's assessment of what happened, and it appears Finn does as well because he's nodding almost as deeply as Henri. I've heard the story from Henri enough to know that he ultimately caused his own death with only a small amount of help from Niklaus.

Henri turns to me and tells me, "I really did know the dangers, but I didn't care. I think that was mostly due to my age at the time, but the fact remains I knew I was putting us both in danger and still worked on convincing Nik to take me to watch the wolves shift."

My eyes are wide, but I nod and tell him, "Hindsight is 20/20, as they say."

We both nod then look at Bonnie whose eyes are wide and round. She's just staring at Kol before he glances at her and then says, "Don't get me wrong, I love Henri to this day, but he used the fact that he was the baby to his advantage every chance he got to get us to do what he wanted. He'd bat his chestnut puppy dog eyes at us, and we'd cave, and he knew that. I don't think he meant anything by it, but it's what led to his death, and I think Nik has far too much guilt about the whole incident, far more than he deserves in my opinion."

Henri nods again and says, "He's right I used my cuteness factor to my advantage every chance I got. I hated it when people said no to me so I would use every resource that was available to me to convince them to change their mind. What I don't think anyone other than Nik knows is I spent months, not days convincing Nik to do what I wanted. The fact of the matter is, I was a spoiled brat, and I'm lucky my siblings still love me despite that fact."

Finn, Freya and I nod. Finn puts his arms around the boy on his lap and squeezes gently before telling him, "We really do still love you despite your faults. It's what family does, we forgive each other our mistakes. You have done the same for us all these years, and our mistakes were far worse than yours ever were."

Placing his hand on top of his brother's arm Henri squeezes but says nothing.

Bonnie is nodding at Kol's words, and Kol nods back and then says, "Back to Mikael, I suspect that he knew Esther had indiscretions with a wolf named Ansel, and that is why he hated the wolves more than most of the people in our village. I'm convinced that he didn't yet know for certain that Nik wasn't his child, though. However, I'm also sure he suspected simply because of how horribly Finn and Elijah say Mikael treated Nik from the moment he was born. Regardless, after Henri died, Mikael spoke with Esther and convinced her to find a way to protect us all and make sure the wolves wouldn't be able to kill any more of us."

Finn frowns and tells us, "It's always amazed me that Mikael didn't forbid her from giving Niklaus the potion because of his involvement with Henrik's death, but I suppose father knew she'd either disobey him or refuse to spell any of us if all of her children weren't included."

I just nod before Kol continues telling my granddaughter, "Her search resulted in her stealing Ayana's family grimoire and finding The Immortality Spell within the pages. She secretly mixed the herbs and made the potion after which Esther sat us all down and had us all drink the concoction. Then to our surprise, Mikael quickly went from person to person and stabbed us in the heart killing us. Most of us died instantly, but he didn't quite hit the mark with me, so I lingered for a few minutes drowning in my own blood while it filled my lungs before he realized I was still alive, and he finished me off."

Bonnie thinks, 'Oh my God, he didn't die right away? Wow. I can't imagine the fear he had when he watched his father kill his siblings or the incredible pain and fear he felt when he then had to lay there drowning in his own blood. They apparently had no idea they'd be coming back alive, or undead, whatever, so he had to be thinking, while he lay there slowly drowning, that his parents had decided to kill them all.'

She knows that doing The Immortality Spell was wrong, but she wonders, 'What kind of person kills their children, even if they know they're going to come back to life. More specifically if you know they're coming back why wouldn't you at least explain it to them and warn them so that they wouldn't be scared.'

She pauses and really thinks about that question. The Mikaelson children were witches so they would have known the magick would work. If they had been aware of what their mother was doing, they wouldn't have been so scared when Mikael stabbed each of them in the heart before Esther turned them into monsters. Then again, even Bonnie knows that the spell The Original Witch did was the blackest of the black, so it stands to reason that her children in all likelihood would have objected on principle alone, maybe. Henri's death upset them greatly, so I can't say for sure that they would have objected but I think Kol would have and my granddaughter tends to agree with my opinion on that subject.

The Mikaelson children didn't know much about dark magick at the time, so Bonnie is correct when she thinks 'Maybe they wouldn't have objected, but if Kol was a prodigy, then he probably knew better.' The teen nods to herself before she continues the thought, 'That has to be why their parents didn't warn them because Kol might have been powerful enough to stop them even if his other siblings weren't strong enough.'

Finn smiles and tells us, "She's smart. Kol would have told all of us all the reasons doing the spell would be a bad idea and he would have convinced all of us, except Mikael that it would be too dangerous. I like to think we would have listened to our brother if he had warned us."

I think they would have.

Bonnie already hates Esther for what she did to our family, but now my granddaughter's fists are clenching, and her teeth are grinding for what the ancient witch did to her own family.

Elena told Bonnie that none of them, other than Mikael, were violent or evil before they turned, so really Esther, at her husband's request, ruined their children's lives before she ruined other people's lives through the actions of the monsters she personally created.

Kol is still talking, so she focuses back on his words when he says, "When we woke it was with an intense thirst and hunger for some unknown thing and a severe sensitivity to the sun, which was shining brightly outside our hut. Mother found the proper spell in Ayana's book and made us daylight rings and then we went out and explored."

His fists clench around the steering wheel and the plastic groans a bit under the stress. I understand his distress because he, more than the rest of them, lost everything that day and he hates talking about what happened next, but he still tells her, "It didn't take long for each of us to come across someone who had injured themselves. In my case the woman, Eija had tripped and scraped her knee. Even just the little tiny bit of blood from that scrape was enough to set me off. She… she was my betrothed and I… well I'm sad to admit that I lost control and the last thing my love knew was the terrible truth that the man she loved was now a monster who was killing her."

He pauses and discreetly wipes at his eyes with one hand before taking a deep breath and then slowly releasing it.

Bonnie thinks, 'God, even over a thousand years later the pain is obviously so very fresh. I wish I could beat Esther and Mikael silly for what they did to Kol and his siblings. I was right. Their parents ruined their lives and turned them into monsters who were completely incapable of controlling themselves because it's obvious if Kol could have stopped he would have spared his love's life.'

Her thoughts pause then she thinks, 'Esther might not have stood there and said, 'Kill Eija,' but she forced him to kill her all the same. His own mother took away the woman he loved and did so by forcing him to kill her with his own hands, or teeth, as the case was. I know Esther is probably on The Otherside right now, but I wish that she's suffering more than she probably is because I'm only just beginning to realize the true scope of the evil she inflicted not just on the world but on her own flesh and blood.'

The Original Bitch is definitely on this side of The Veil and trying to think up ways to get back to the living world so that she can finish what she attempted to do a month ago.

She, to my knowledge, is still feeling the pain of any of her children's victims but the fact of the matter is most of them haven't killed anyone in some time, and I think Niklaus is the only one who has killed since Esther died again. Well, actually Niklaus killed all those people turning them into vampires so that Jeremy could grow his tattoo and then Kol murdered all of them a second time to keep the young hunter from getting any closer to finding Silas' tomb. Therefore, I suppose the bitch has felt a bit of pain since she died the second time, but I agree whatever pain she has felt is not nearly as much as she deserves.

Kol takes another deep breath, and after releasing it even slower than the last, he looks at Bonnie sitting beside him and frowning he tells her, "Now you need to realize that none of my siblings nor I delved into the dark magick our mother was so fond of towards the end of her life. Actually, no one in our Village, not even Ayana, touched the dark, except our mother, so the truth is we didn't even know that transitioning was a possibility. Even if we had, I doubt any of us would have chosen it. I certainly wouldn't have simply because I knew even then that dark magick always comes with a price you don't actually want to pay. Her disregard for the danger that casting that spell would pose for, not just us, but for the world at large ultimately cost Eija her life and by my own hand no less."

He pauses and then sighs before he tells Bonnie, "Honestly, except Mikael, we were for the most part gentle, peaceful, loving individuals before turning, though I can readily admit that I, more than the others, had a short fuse even while human."

Bonnie is frowning while he talks because it's exactly like she thought it was. Esther knew that at least Kol was aware enough to know of the danger she was planning to put everyone in, and that is undoubtedly why Esther and Mikael didn't warn any of their children about what they were doing to them.

Kol sighs again and tells her, "Unfortunately, my fuse got infinitely shorter once I woke in transition, and to tell you the truth if Nik hadn't killed Esther after she cursed him I probably would have to avenge Eija's death. God knows Mikael went on a rampage and killed every wolf he could find sparking a feud between vampires and wolves that wages on just as strongly even today. Then of course after trying to eradicate an entire species the abusive arse came after us."

Bonnie heard enough from Elena about what Rebekah told her even without what Kol has told her today to know that Mikael was indeed abusive at best and downright monstrous to his own children at worst, and then he became a vampire and that amplified his emotions including his rage.

Kol seems to agree when he says, "And the bloodlust, well when that happened none of us were prepared for it. I was one of the unfortunate fools I spoke of earlier who took damn near three centuries before I could be within a thousand metres of an open wound and not go berserk and kill everyone who was within a kilometre of the wound. And it took many, many more centuries before I could get angry or jealous and not automatically kill everyone present in my rage, and honestly, I still struggle with my anger and jealousy at times. Though, both are far less likely to cause me to kill now than they were when I first transitioned."

Bonnie's eyes widen at his words, and she thinks, 'Damn, that's almost 11 football fields, and it took him most of 300 years to be able to be that close to an open wound and not kill everyone? And it was centuries more before he got the rage under control? Just how difficult is it?'

She heard him earlier, but I don't think it really registered how difficult it is because the only experience she has with it is watching her two best friends who both seem to do alright. She frowns and thinks, 'Then again Stefan has been a vampire for over 145 years, and he still goes bonkers in the presence of human blood. Then there is Damon who when he's angry or hurt lashes out at the nearest person and damn the consequences, so I suppose each person is different even without the sire taking the steps Kol mentioned earlier to make the progeny's vampire life easier to live with.'

Kol is still frowning when he tells my baby girl a closely guarded secret, "The only thing I can say to my credit is that I never turned my switch off because I felt that would be cheating. If I was quote-unquote 'man enough' or 'badass enough' to take, more often than not, completely innocent lives, then I should also be man enough to deal with the emotional consequences of my actions."

My granddaughter's mouth is forming a little 'o' while she ponders his words, 'Okay Wow, that... Just wow. It had to take an incredible amount of willpower to resist the urge to turn off the guilt that I'm beginning to realize Kol is still plagued with to this day.'

Kol nods lazily and tells Bonnie, "None of my siblings' or my difficulties acclimating were our own fault either. It was Esther and Mikael's faults because they chose to use dark magick to solve a problem that didn't require such drastic measures, and therefore, they chose this life for us. While I realize that Esther tried to right the wrong she said she committed, in reality, she was punishing her victims for not reacting in a way she approved of, and I highly doubt there were any noble intentions on her part."

He frowns then says, "In fact, she mentioned feeling the pain of each of our victims all these years, and I firmly believe that that's likely why she tried to kill us; the selfish bitch did it to stop feeling the pain of our victims who were, when you come down to it, in actuality her victims. Her efforts really had little to nothing to do with her trying to undo the quote-unquote 'evil' she perpetrated on the world like she said."

Kol pauses and grips the steering wheel tightly once more causing it to creak under the strain again then he says, "If you ask me, she deserves to feel the pain of every single last person we've ever hurt. Without her, and her use of major dark magick, we would not have become what we are, and every single last one of our victims would not have died at our hands."

Bonnie and I both agree with him there. Every death caused by the Mikaelson children and their descendants is The Original Witch's fault, and every drop of blood shed by any vampire ever is on Esther's hands. I agree with Kol's belief about his mother's motives for trying to kill her children, too. I mean my granddaughter was, at first, willing to help, but that was because she thought it would save her friends from Niklaus, and she didn't know it would kill every vampire in existence. Esther, on the other hand, seemed more maniacal in her insistence that her children die. My grandbaby and I both also tend to agree that Esther was ultimately trying to punish her victims for her own wrongdoings.

Bonnie frowns and thinks, 'What I know of the bloodlust, including what Kol just told me, tells me that the Mikaelsons wouldn't have necessarily been able to control it at first, so in that sense, the deaths weren't their fault until they gained control and then continued killing. Though, I can admit that if you spend centuries out of control killing willy-nilly, then it probably wouldn't be a stretch for you to continue the trend even after you gain control of yourself simply because killing would be all that you had known for hundreds of years.'

She shakes her head ever so slightly, 'That means it's likely a miracle and an act of God, Himself, that the Mikaelsons haven't caused widespread bloodbaths while they've been here.'

She stops and focuses on Kol's words again and frowns deeper when he tells her, "However, killing an entire species would have upset the balance and done far more harm than good. Nature righted the balance and made vampires and wolves each other's checks and balances, so to speak. If Esther had killed every vampire in existence, then there would have been no one left to keep the wolves in check. Not to mention that at least hundreds of thousands of people, if not millions, would have been killed when we died, and there's nothing to say that all of them are quote-unquote 'evil.'"

My baby girl nods even while she's still frowning, 'Okay he has a point there as well. Killing all those vampires would have upset the balance far worse than their existences ever did. And he's also right about the uncertainty of the evilness of every vampire. I remember Elena telling me about Stefan's friend Lexi. She helped get Stefan off human blood a couple of times, if I recall correctly, so she wasn't evil. And I can grudgingly admit that Damon's not all bad when his switch is on. I mean anyone who loves as wholly and selflessly as he obviously loves Elena must be worth saving right? Plus, my two best friends aren't even remotely evil.'

Kol turns and looks at Bonnie briefly before he tells her, "Anyway, have I done terrible things in my life? Definitely. Have I done far worse things than you probably ever will? Again, the answer to that is probably yes, or at least I hope it's true. Am I sorry for the death, pain, and mayhem I've caused, and do I regret my less than noble actions? In most cases, the answer to that is also yes."

He glances at her and then says, "Although, I will admit that there were a few who deserved everything I gave them and so much more. They would fall under the category of defending or avenging myself or my loved ones, though, which we've already ascertained you do as well."

My granddaughter pulls up short at that. Kol's words throughout this entire conversation seem genuine to her, including his expressing remorse about his 'less than noble actions' so she thinks, 'Perhaps he's not as evil as he appears at first glance. I mean he works to remember every one of his victims in a weird way of showing his respect towards them, not to mention his obvious pain over the death of the woman he loved. Both of those things imply regret over his actions just as much as, if not more so than, his words just now do.'

I smile slightly when she recalls one of my favorite expressions. I'd always tell her, 'Baby Girl, never judge a book by its cover.' Truer words have probably never been spoken when judging the overall character and personality of Kol Mikaelson.

She nods slightly when Kol says, "The point is we're all works in progress, and while I definitely have more work to do than most in terms of being a decent person that doesn't mean I'm incapable of caring."

She thinks that the mere fact that he's willing to admit that he needs to work on being a better person means he's worth saving, and she never thought he was incapable of caring. She only wondered why he cares how she feels.

Kol smiles and says, "I told you last night that I've called many witches my friends, and I've even loved two of them deeply and passionately. You may not believe me, Bonnie, but I care what happens to you and what you're feeling."

When she woke up this morning, my granddaughter didn't think Kol gave two hoots about her and her feelings or welfare, but she's beginning to realize that because they technically barely know each other she may have underestimated his investment in her and her life. He still seems genuine to her, though, so she finds herself nodding and agreeing that, yes, he probably does care for her in his own way.

Kol cuts his chocolate eyes towards Bonnie while he drives and says, "I was serious last night when I said it takes a lot to impress me, and you definitely did exactly that." He pauses then adds, "I'm not talking about your use of magick either because that Expression shit, more often than not, gets good witches dead faster than they should be."

After pausing again he shakes his head in the negative and tells her, "No, to save your loved ones you ran headfirst into a situation you knew full well was incredibly dangerous, you thought quickly on your feet, decided the best route to ensure as many of us survived as possible, and then you took action. You took that action knowing full well that your snotty, judgmental, and, in my opinion, wholly undeserving, best friend will take years to forgive you if she ever does. You, Darling, put the welfare of everyone else above your own feelings and happiness by risking Ms. Gilbert's ire."

He's right again. My granddaughter loves Elena, but she knows full well that she'll be lucky if Elena ever forgives her for helping chop off Jeremy's arms never mind for her involvement in preventing her friend from regaining her human state of being. Bonnie honestly couldn't see any other way to save everyone, though, so there really wasn't another option. To be fair, I couldn't then and still can't see another option that would have prevented her very frightening premonition from coming true or, worse yet, Silas rising. Either event would have caused everyone she loves to die gruesome deaths, so she did the right thing even though we both know full well that Elena won't see it that way.

Kol's not done praising her, though, so he says, "Incidentally, you did the same thing when you decided to kill the professor too. I wager you knew you'd be saddled with the guilt of his death for the rest of your life, but you still chose to do it because it was the only way to protect everyone you care about."

She dejectedly thinks, 'I wish he hadn't brought that up. I had managed to finally go ten minutes without thinking about what I did to Shane.'

She just nods, though, so he continues, "However, I get the sense that while you care deeply for others and make great personal sacrifices for your loved ones, hardly anyone is much interested in your pain and heartache."

That's true too, her friends often overlook her pain or perspective on things. They're usually too busy worrying about their own issues to notice hers, but she thinks, 'I'm mostly okay with that because generally, their issues are more life or death than mine usually are.'

Deep down, though, it does really bother her even if she's unwilling to admit that, even to herself, at this point.

I smile slightly, though, when Kol says, "I know I'm probably the last person you want to call your friend, but I am your friend, Bonnie, and I do care about the pain you're in as well as any needs you might have that aren't being fulfilled by the other people in your life."

After this conversation, she thinks there are worse people she could call her friend, and the idea that someone cares about her and her pain and needs is incredibly comforting. She frowns and thinks, 'Now, he could just be saying it to get me comfortable with him, so he can win me over to his side or kill me or something equally evil, but I still think he's 100% genuine,' so she discards the thought.

Kol pauses, and it would be the perfect time for her to tell him she doesn't mind calling him her friend but the words just won't come to her. After a minute, he begins to fill the silence again, "Little known fact about vampires: Our condition gives us Eidetic Memory. So, I remember, as if it just happened, the heartache of waking up covered in blood and surrounded by the dead bodies of my friends and neighbors in our village, as well as the crack in my heart when I realized I was the one who made them dead."

My baby girl silently laments, 'Okay, wow, that sucks. Not just that he killed people, and people he knew and cared about at that, but I still, after everything he's said to me today, can't even begin to imagine the pain that he must have gone through when he realized he had been turned into a blood hungry monster by his own parents.'

The good news she tells herself, 'Is that I don't have Eidetic Memory, so eventually, the memory of feeling Shane's life slip away will fade into a more manageable ache rather than the searing pain it currently is, or at least that is my hope.'

Kol smiles and says, "Like I said we're not all that different you and me. Circumstances beyond either of our control have caused us to do terrible things. The only difference is that I've been stuck in those circumstances for far longer than you have been and therefore have accumulated far more sins than you have in your relatively brief time as an active witch."

He's right once again, though they appear, at first glance, to be vastly different individuals, in reality, behind their masks, the two of them are really cut from the same cloth.

He flips the blinker again before pulling into a parallel parking space by the local coffee shop. My granddaughter giggles and thinks, 'He parallel parks better than I do.'

Smiling, he asks, "What has you giggling, Little Witch?"

Grinning brightly, she tells him, "Nothing, it's just… you've been locked in a coffin for 100 years and have only been driving in modern times for a little over a month, yet you parallel park way better than I do, and I've been driving since I was 16."

Kol smiles back at her and says, "What can I say? I'm just a natural."

She nods, and once the car is in park, he turns off the car before getting out, walking to her door, and opening it for her. When he reaches his hand down towards her, she finds herself taking it while he helps her out of the car. Smiling softly, he says, "Come on, Darling, your coffee is on me, and I'll behave so I won't even compel the teller into thinking I paid when I didn't."

Laughing at that she begins walking, sighing slightly when his hand goes to the small of her back causing her to think, 'I don't know what it is about a guy guiding me with their hand in the small of my back, but it always makes me want to swoon, and this time is no different.'

She focuses on putting one foot in front of the other, though, instead of swooning and making a fool of herself in front of 'the ancient, sexy as sin vampire.'

That promise she made to herself earlier that she's not going to crush on the 'Happy Homicidal Maniac' is becoming harder and harder to keep. Kol is saying and doing all the right things, so with every passing second, she spends in his company, she falls for his charm just a tiny bit more.