A/N—Reminder that I don't own these characters and that all credit goes to the creators of "Big Time Rush."
So a note about this chapter. I'm a little worried that the format of the game won't carry over, because when I wrote it everything worked fine, but when I emailed it to my beta, the spacing got wonky. So to combat that, I've added slash marks between each word of the game. For example, if I was trying for "I love you" it would look like _ / _ _ _ _ / _ _ _. And let's just hope that carries over properly too. Really praying this isn't too confusing and comes out right.
If not, I'm here for any questions you might have! Thank you for reading! :D
UPDATE: It did mess up some of the game, because it isn't allowing the F word at one point. Oh, this site. Again, sorry for any confusion.
Kendall had no trouble finding James in the auditorium, assuming correctly that he would sit in the back row. He slid into the seat next to him, surprised that James had a notebook open on his lap as if he was about to take notes. "Hey."
"What the hell? Didn't I tell you specifically not to sit next to me?"
"I wanted to know if you'd heard anything from Logan. How's he doing?"
"He didn't text you?"
"When he first got home, yeah. That was hours ago. Have you heard since then?"
"I called him a few minutes ago. He was gonna take some NyQuil and pass out. Said he threw up one more time after getting home but now his stomach's settling down."
"Good," Kendall nodded. "He sounded okay?"
"He sounded tired. But otherwise okay. He was cranky, which is a good sign."
"How is that good?"
"Because he always gets cranky with me when I worry about him, unless he's super sick."
"Has he been super sick since you've known him?"
"Once. He exhausted himself and was stressed out trying to run a tutoring program after school. I made him give that up after a month because he got so sick."
"Sounds like Logan," Kendall chuckled. "You taking notes?"
"I thought about it, for Logan. But I suck at note-taking. I start out with words and end up with doodles all over the page. So probably not."
"I'm sure he'll appreciate that you tried."
The meeting was called to order, James waiting for Kendall to move away and praying he would. It was getting more and more difficult to pretend like he wasn't drooling every time he looked at the asshole, and what if Kendall decided to fuck with him and do that whispering thing again?
Well, at least there was a notebook covering his lap. Thank god for small blessings.
Kendall actually paid attention to the meeting, at least for the first five minutes. Then he started to fidget. His left leg was soon bouncing up and down, James doing his best to not let the motion distract him.
When the inevitable whisper came, it wasn't seductive at all. "Okay, this officially sucks. Think we can sneak out?"
"I wish. They pass around a clipboard for us to sign in and since we're in the back, it'll take forever to get here. Damn, I should've sat up front. But of course then they'd see me sneak out."
"How do you guys stand this?"
James wrote two words in the notebook, then tilted it toward Kendall.
"Like this."
Kendall waited for more, but there was nothing. "I don't get it," he whispered.
James scribbled again. "We write notes. Or play games."
One of Kendall's eyebrows shot up. He held out a hand for the pencil and notebook; James complied.
"What kind of games?"
Now it was James' turn. "All kinds. He thinks MASH is stupid, but plays it anyway for me."
"I haven't played that since 4th grade."
"It's still fun. There's also hangman."
Hangman. Now there was a game Kendall could play. He wasn't much for word games, but he'd always enjoyed the guessing part of Hangman.
He glanced over at James, who briefly acknowledged it before facing the front. After thinking for a few moments, Kendall drew the Hangman symbol and a series of spaces below it.
When James saw the doodle, he grinned. Logan had taught him all the tricks to be good at Hangman. He wrote down the letter E.
Kendall adjusted the spaces so they looked like this: _ _ _ _ _ _ e
James grinned. Good old Logan with his advice that E was the most commonly used letter. Next he tried S. Kendall filled in the blanks.
_ s s _ _ _ e
Okay, two of the most common letters down. Logan had also mentioned N as a frequent one. When he tried that, Kendall drew the hangman's head.
Damn. Okay, time for a vowel. He went with I.
_ s s _ i _ e
James studied the letters and wrote down a word. "Missile."
"Not even close. It doesn't even work."
When James looked again, he realized Kendall was right. What about... "isspipe"
Now there was a stick drawn straight down from the head. "Dude there can't be another I and that's not even a word. You suck at this game. Try another letter instead of guessing."
That pissed James off. Yes, Logan reminded him of rules like that, but he was never rude about it. Just...a little frustrated occasionally. He took a deep, calming breath and looked at the puzzle again. Maybe time for another vowel. He could see one fitting into the beginning, so...
"A"
Kendall filled in the letter so that it now read: a s s _ i _ e
James looked at it and his jaw dropped. When he looked to his left, Kendall was smirking in challenge, his green eyes twinkling. "Asshole," James muttered under his breath.
"Close, but not quite," Kendall whispered.
"I know what the word is!" James hissed more loudly than he meant to, causing two teachers in front of them to glance back. "Sorry."
Once they'd turned away, James yanked the notebook from Kendall and wrote down the correct word.
"asswipe"
Kendall silently clapped next to him. James flipped to a new page and drew another hangman symbol, knowing exactly what he wanted to say to Kendall.
_ _ _ _ / _ _ _
"Two words?" Kendall asked quietly. James nodded. He grinned when Kendall chose E first, doing exactly what James had thought he would. James drew the head. Kendall tried again with N. A stick appeared instead. After thinking more, Kendall tried A. One leg was drawn.
Kendall used the pencil to write, "You do realize it has to be actual words, right?"
"Trust me, these are real words."
"Are they spelled right?"
"Hell yes."
"Huh," Kendall said out loud, studying the spaces. He wrote "hell yes."
"Nice try, but you already used E. Moron."
Kendall supposed he deserved that insult. He tried S and was again disappointed by a second leg joining the hangman's body. "What the hell?" he whispered. This was why Katie always beat him at Hangman, because she knew which letters were most commonly used.
Then again, this was James Diamond he was playing with. Maybe he should go the opposite route.
When he tried a U, he was rewarded with two spaces being filled in.
_ u _ _ / _ _ u
Rather than seem annoyed that Kendall had gotten somewhere, James stared at him in challenge as if daring him to keep guessing correctly. Kendall chose O.
_ u _ _ / _o u
All it took was one look into James' eyes to know what he was thinking. With a grin, Kendall wrote out "fuck you".
Proud of himself, James drew a happy face.
Oh, it's on. Kendall started a fresh game, this time adding a third word.
_ _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _ _ _ _
James tried E, S, and N with no luck. He finally got somewhere with A.
_ _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _ a _ _
T yielded no new results, but R did.
_ _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _ a r _
What was it Logan had said about common letters versus uncommon ones? Something about how weird things come in groups? Or was that him talking about the punk rock kids at the mall? Well, it couldn't hurt to try that, because the common letters weren't doing him any good on this one. Or maybe he could compromise with that weirdass letter that for some unknown reason worked as both a consonant and a vowel. He tried Y.
_ _ _ _ / y _ _ / _ a r _
You. The second word had to be you. Which took him back to "fuck you" but Kendall couldn't reuse that, right? Or...
Testing his theory, he guessed U.
_ u _ _ / y _ u / _ a r _
"You can't use the same thing twice."
"I changed it. Not the same thing."
James supposed that might be allowed. So he knew the first two words, what could possibly come after "fuck you"? Was Kendall calling him some insult name like...narc? Dark? No, that didn't make sense. But it was better than anything else he had going. He tried D.
_ u _ _ / y _ u / _ a r d
A soft gasp left him when it fell into place. It wasn't a name; it was a description of sex, and a style that James was dying to experience. Attempting to keep from showing that he was overheated, James wrote it out.
"fuck you hard"
"If you were gay, that would be fucking with you so hard right now, wouldn't it?"
"But I'm not."
"It's fun to piss you off anyway."
James turned the page and angrily scratched out a new hangman symbol and three fresh words.
_ _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _ _ _ _
Already knowing where James was going with it, Kendall chose F first.
f _ _ _ / _ _ _ / f _ _ _
All he had to figure out was the third word. How would he love to be fucked? He tried A.
f _ _ _ / _ _ _ / f a _ _
Jesus. When both S and T proved to be correct, Kendall had to squeeze his legs together to keep from squirming. Had he ever been so turned on?
Yes. King does this to you. Maybe tonight he'll do it again.
Kendall wrote out "fuck you fast." James grinned evilly, and Kendall took his turn. At this point they easily could have just written the words out instead of making each other guess, but the torture of drawing it out seemed to add to the excitement.
When it was Kendall's turn to choose the puzzle, he repeated the pattern. James didn't even bother picking the letters of the first two words; it was the last word that mattered.
His E and N were wrong. S, on the other hand...
_ _ _ _ / _ _ _ / s _ _ _
James' foot was tapping now, body restless. He thought of and discarded words that would make sense and fit with the puzzle, stumped until he remembered his own last one.
Fast.
He suddenly knew what it was and had to bite down a moan. Sure enough, the next three letters were correct so that he filled in "fuck you slow."
Wasn't this meeting over yet? James could swear they'd been here for days. He really needed to get away from Kendall, because this wasn't going to do either of them any good in a room filled with people.
He glanced up at the clock on the wall and saw they should have about five minutes left, if everything ran on time. Kendall nudged him with a clipboard, James quickly signing it before handing it across him to an aide. They could leave now. It was five minutes early, nobody would notice.
Was James about to walk away from this, though? Hell no. Not without having the last word.
For his final puzzle, he stretched it to six words. Kendall's eyes widened, impressed. He started with F to make sure they were still on the same page, and when that was correct he tried for something not included in the basic "fuck you" they had going. He was rewarded with four spaces being filled in.
f _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _ _ / a _ a _ _ _ _ / a / _ a _ _
Still, it was a lot of words. And they were running out of time. Maybe the basic word would fill in other spots. He tried U.
f u _ _ / _ _ u / u _ / a _ a _ _ _ _ / a / _ a _ _
Well, it was something. Still not enough, though. C got him nowhere new, and neither did K. There seemed to be a lot of vowels already, so he went with Y. Still nothing helpful.
Time was running out and he really needed to know what James had picked.
What would Katie do? He could hear her voice in his head. "Go back to basics. When you've tried the weird stuff, try the easy stuff again."
Okay, so...S? N? T? He tried S and got lucky. N also worked for one space. T was another winner, and he sat back to stare at what he had so far.
/ y _ u / u_ / a _ a _ n s t / a/ _ a _ _
James leaned over. "Almost out of time, Knight. Clock's ticking."
Kendall let out a frustrated sigh and looked up at the wall clock. He could hear the speaker wrapping things up, knew that if he didn't guess this James would never let him live it down. He focused harder and realized the third word had to be "up." It could be us, except...
No. We already used S. It has to be up. Fuck you up...against?
That made sense at least. Fuck you up against...
Kendall gasped this time, looking at the clock again, which was on the...
Wall.
Oh shit. Oh holy fucking shit, he can't be serious. He can't fucking be serious.
Very slowly and with shaking fingers, Kendall filled in the blanks.
"fuck you up against a wall"
James held up a hand and whispered, "Nice job, Knight."
Before he could return the high five, everything around him was in motion. Bags being zipped up, bodies standing from seats, laughter floating to him.
And he was harder than he'd ever been in his life because all he could think about was Diamond fucking him up against a wall.
"See you tomorrow, pal," James smirked. He snatched the notebook away, causing Kendall to grab for his backpack and shove it onto his lap. "I'll make sure Logan checks in with you tonight."
Logan.
What was he doing? He was dating someone. Dating someone! He couldn't be thinking about this guy like that.
Kendall watched James join the mass of bodies leaving the room, wondering why James was torturing him like this. Yes, they liked messing with each other, but James wasn't even gay.
That never stops him from doing it to Logan, does it? To him it's just a game.
"Asswipe," he muttered. "You really do have no heart."
James let himself into Logan's apartment quietly with his own key. Just as he'd expected, it was to the sight of Logan asleep on the sofa with a documentary about who knows what playing at a low volume on the television. He set his bag of groceries down on the kitchen counter, about to put the 7UP in the fridge when he remembered Logan once saying it worked better on an upset stomach at room temperature.
Gross, but Logan's never wrong, so...
On the counter it went.
After kicking off his shoes near the couch, James reached down for the remote before gently lifting Logan's legs and sliding under them and the blanket covering him. Logan shifted, a cough breaking free, and James rubbed a hand over his calf.
"You shouldn't be here."
And wow, did Logan sound miserable. His voice was raspy and nasally. James squeezed Logan's knee. "You know I had to make sure you're okay."
"I'm okay. Swear. But I don't want to get you sick."
"I'm not worried about it. Besides, it wouldn't kill me to spend a day lounging at home."
"Without pay, it might. You don't get sick pay, right?"
"I don't," James sighed. "But money's not a problem for me, and even so I have a best friend who is obsessed with saving money, so if I get into a tight spot I know I'll be okay because that best friend will bail me out."
Logan didn't argue that point. "You still shouldn't be sick."
James continued to flip channels. "How about you worry about you for a change, and let me do the same?" He felt Logan raise his head and stare across the couch at him but forced himself to keep his eyes on the screen. Logan was adorably fuckable when he was mussed from sleep. "Oh, I'm supposed to ask you to text Kendall."
"I did."
"I meant when I got here. The dickweed's worried about you."
"That's so sweet." Logan reached for his phone, swiping it off the coffee table and smiling at the screen. "He texted me after the meeting."
The meeting. James didn't want to think about the meeting; not only did it send guilt crushing down over his chest, it made his dick want to stand up proudly. Knock it off, you are NOT allowed to lust after your best friend's boyfriend.
"He asked if he can bring me anything. Isn't he amazing?"
James rolled his eyes. "I told him I had it covered. He needs to back off."
"I think it's adorable."
"Well, tell him I took care of it. I brought you soup and crackers and 7UP."
"Did you really?"
"Of course. It's what you always bring me."
"No, I make you soup. That store-bought crap is...crap."
"It's the best I can do. I even got the homestyle kind, so maybe it'll be almost as good as yours."
After responding to Kendall that he was in good hands, Logan set down his phone and stared at James again. James continued to focus on the television. Logan sat up.
"Where are you going? You should be laying down."
"I'm fine, I just have to run to the bathroom." At James' panicked look, he quickly added, "No, not for that. Just normal stuff."
"Okay. Call me if you need me."
"James, I really am fine. It's the flu."
"I don't care if it's a fucking paper cut, I want you to call me if you need me."
Logan slid a hand over to squeeze James' thigh, smiling as he stood up. James tried not to react.
The urge to read the texts between them was hard to resist once Logan was gone. He reminded himself it didn't matter; he knew they were dating, he knew they probably sent things like hearts and kisses to each other, and seeing it with his own eyes would only upset him more. It was difficult, but James resisted.
When Logan returned, he sat further from James but this time laid down so that his head was on James' lap. James' hand automatically smoothed Logan's hair before helping him get the blanket settled. "I thought you were trying to protect me from your germs."
"Well, at least if you get sick, we can stay home and be sick together."
"Somehow that actually sounds like a nice idea."
Logan's cheek was warm against his thigh. James pressed his hand to the one he could reach. "You're still hot."
"My fever's going down. I just took my temperature."
"Okay. Can I get you anything?"
"Just your presence."
"Done."
One hand rubbed soothingly up and down Logan's arm, the other got lost in Logan's hair and gently massaged his scalp.
"That's nice. But are you really forcing me to watch cartoons?"
"These are cool cartoons. About vampires and demons."
"I'm probably just going to sleep anyway. The NyQuil's making it hard to stay awake."
"Good, you need to sleep."
"You'll stay, right?"
"Not going anywhere."
Logan bent his arm so that he could twine their fingers together. "Thanks for taking care of me."
"You know I always do."
"I know. And you do it well."
"That's mutual."
"James...I never say it, but...I appreciate you. I'd be lost without you just like you'd be lost without me."
"You wouldn't, though."
"I would."
"You'd find someone else. Like Kendall."
"He's great, but...he's not you."
"Good thing, since you don't want to date me."
Logan bit his lip, the medicine getting harder to fight. His eyelids were heavy when he asked, "What happened after I left? Did you two eat lunch together?"
"No. I left him in the lounge."
"Did you at least leave him the food?"
"Nope."
"James..."
"He had his sandwich, he was fine."
After letting out a sigh, Logan snuggled deeper against James' thigh. "How was the meeting?"
"Boring as always. I wanted to take notes for you, but that didn't happen."
"Thanks for thinking of me. Did you sneak out early?"
"No. I uh...Kendall was worried about you so he came over to ask me how you were, and then he ended up staying."
"You didn't kill each other?"
"We played Hangman."
"Seriously?"
"Yep."
"Who won?"
"Uh...we didn't really keep score."
"Is he any good?"
He's so fucking good. James swallowed, fighting down the feelings that wanted to surface when he remembered their sexual word joust. "I'm sure you could beat him."
"Probably. I'm glad you two are getting along. It makes me feel like less of a jerk for dating him."
Which makes me feel like more of a jerk for wanting him. God, I'm the worst person. Wanting the feelings of guilt to go away, James focused on the scalp massage and squeezed Logan's hand. He was right where he wanted to be, and nothing was better than this. "I'll heat up the soup in a few hours."
There was no answer. Logan had fallen into a peaceful slumber.