I accidentally uploaded the wrong chapter. So I added the missing chapter to the beginning of this one. So sorry for the confusion. Thanks to the reviewer who noticed something was missing.
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"Hey Ed, you dropped your keys...catch!" Emmett shouts as I walk down the steps of the campus fitness center. I turn around to grab the tossed object, but Emmett's aim is slightly off so I have to reach back to get them. As I'm reaching, I feel my elbow hit something soft.
"Oof" is all I hear as I swear, "Oh shit."
I turn around and I see the most gorgeous brunette scowling at me. Rubbing her chest.
"Dude. You whacked me in the boob," she says.
I blink as I stare longingly at said boob being caressed by her slender, pale fingers. I'm speechless, which doesn't happen to me often. I also may be sporting a semi. Which may be slightly inappropriate considering the circumstances, but it's been a long time and she's really hot.
"This is what I get for actually attempting to work out. I'm going to kill Alice. I should've stayed home and worked on my new app. Imagine being sore before I even get on a machine," she mutters, walking away. It gives me a great view of her ass which is equally spectacular. Thank you, spandex shorts. "Thanks a lot," she adds, making me snap out of my hot girl haze.
"Fuck...I'm so sorry! I hope your boob-er, breast is okay," I call out after her. She turns around to glance at me. She snorts and shakes her head.
"Can I pay for your doctor bill?" I say, hopefully. "Nothing's damaged, right?"
"Oh my god, my implant ruptured!" she cries out, holding her chest.
"What...no...I'll call 911...fuck...should I apply pressure?" I reach out for her chest, and she grabs ahold of my hands.
She starts laughing. "I'm messing with you. Geez. Like these are implants." She gestures to her chest.
"But they're really perfect," I mumble. "You're perfect."
She blushes. She looks even better with pink cheeks.
"I'm really sorry I hit you and then stood there like an idiot."
"No harm done. They'll be lopsided forever, but they weren't seeing much action anyway."
Again I gape at her chest. She laughs and walks off. "Still messing with you."
I'm standing there watching her walk into the fitness center when my two friends join me.
"Pleases mess with me again," I call out, weakly. What the fuck just happened?
"Nice pull, Ed," Emmett says.
"There was no pull...I mean not that kind. I just hit her."
"What the hell?" exclaims Jasper.
"I didn't mean it that way. I accidentally elbowed her in the chest - when this idiot chucked my keys. And then I just stood there because she was so...well, you could see her. And she was funny and smart too. Fuck."
"Dude I'm sure you'll get another chance to talk to her, I mean she's our-" Jasper says before being interrupted by Emmett.
"She's a student here, so I bet we'll see her again," he says, nudging Jasper. "Right?"
"Yeah," Jasper says. "Maybe sooner than you think."
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"This one is for you, Bella. His profile request fits you exactly," Alice tells me as I walk into my kitchen. She waves a sheet of paper in front of my face, which I snatch. "Plus, he sounds super hot."
I don't normally do the interactive part of my service, but I decided to do some hands-on research in order to improve our offerings. We are doing very well, thanks to my partners and employees, but there's always room to grow.
"He's perfect for your first time."
"I'm sure he'll be gentle with me." I pour myself a cup of coffee and sit down with his information sheet.
"Yes. I bet he'd be a caring lover."
I almost snort my coffee out of my nose.
"You gathered that from his answers on the questionnaire?" I scoff.
"It's a feeling I get in my bones."
"Great. You and my great aunt Sue have something in common. Her bones hurt when it's going to rain. Do you have the gout too?"
"Bella, Bella, Bella. So young and cynical. If you absolutely refuse to date anyone right now, you need to work out or something. Too much tension."
"I actually went to the fitness center yesterday, thank you. And I told you that I'm too busy growing this business and trying to graduate to date right now. Besides, you know what losers I attract. I don't have time to find one of the few decent guys out there." My mind flashes back to the hot, awkward man I saw yesterday and I sigh. I should have done something other than make glib remarks. Oh well. At least I have my career going for me.
Alice shakes her head sadly. She and Rose have been after me to try dating again, probably since they're both so happy. They've suggested a triple date with Emmett and Jasper's friend, but I've refused several times.
"I really wish you'd reconsider getting set up with E-"
"Negatory. You're forgetting that I know Emmett and Jasper too well, so their friend would not be for me. No offense."
"I still think you'd be great together."
"I'll just stick to a fauxmance, thank you. This won't leave me with the dinner bill and a strange sore like after the last time you set me up."
"That was three years ago, and the doctor concluded it wasn't herpes, Bella."
"Yeah. I love your 'glass full' spin on 'not herpes.' You're super lucky it was only on my upper lip and not-"
She interrupts, "And not on your lower lips." She sighs. "Will you please let that die?"
"You'll be reminded of that for the rest of my life, because that's how long I would've had the herpes!"
"Geez. You'd think a friend would want to get set up on a hot date with a very eligible man."
"No. I'm tempted to start using my own service so you two will leave me alone. Now let me get back to this client."
She huffs and then curtseys to me. "Yes, Boss. As your humble servant, I'm so glad I picked out this client especially for you. You're perfect for each other."
I roll my eyes and then look over the preferences of my new client: brunette, petite, intelligent, self-motivated. He's tall, athletic, green eyes, and likes the same things I do. Alice was right, he is perfect. He's a law student looking for a cover for an over-bearing mother. His ideal date...ooh that sounds good. And the backstory he wants is so cute. He literally bumped into her - me, I guess - and wanted to know more about her, I mean me. Whatever. He gets her number from some friends and they start a texting relationship to see if they're compatible.
The scenario makes me think of what I should have done yesterday with boob whack guy. If I had the guts, I would have done lots of things with boob whack guy. Dirty, filthy, things that would have made him even sweatier.
"Are you going to do Ed, er, that guy?" Rosalie asks, reading over my shoulder. I didn't even hear her come in. She's stealthy like that. And eerily close to the truth. "That's a really good backstory I wrote. Starting out as a new couple just getting to know each other. You're new and inexperienced; he's perfect to break you in slowly."
"What's with the virgin innuendo? That ship sailed a few years ago," I say.
"Bella's like a virgin...texting for the very first time...with her iPhone next to mine," Alice sings.
"But your ship's been in dry dock since," Rosalie replies. "Like really dry."
"Thanks for that. But it doesn't really matter, does it? This guy isn't going to actually moisten my dock-"
"Eww. That was gross," Rosalie says. "No wonder your 'ship' is abandoned and dried up."
"Okay. We have business to discuss. Enough with the 'Bella needs to get a sailor to board her ship' talk."
"On the good ship...Cherry Pop..." Alice belts out.
"Shirley Temple. Timely," I remark.
"Vintage," Rosalie says.
"It's a sweet trip to the condom shop..." Alice continues. Because who's going to stop her? "Where Boss Bella plaaays, on her iPhone, while we try to get her la-aaaid…"
I used to think the singing was cute. Like a long time ago.
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The next day I'm going over sales figures when I get a text.
Hi. My friends gave me your number. I bumped into you by the gym. Still sorry about that, BTW.
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Thank you, everyone for all the comments. I appreciate everyone who takes their time to review, follow, and favorite.
Cosmogirl7481 is the bestest. Go read Scorched and leave her some nice words.
MariahajilE is a sweetheart with pretty hair.
I constantly rewrite, so all mistakes are mine.