A/N—Reminder that I don't own these characters and that all credit goes to the creators of "Big Time Rush."

A note regarding this chapter. I actually researched to see what would happen if you added two people under the same phone number to your contacts. On my phone, what happens is that the phone allows it and doesn't alert you that it's a number you already have. I tried it to be sure. So Kendall adding James' number to his phone even though King was already in there wouldn't be an issue; the phone treats it as a new number and new contact. What happens when that number calls you, however, is a different story. The way I wrote this is the way it would look in the situation they're in.

Moving on. Another shorter chapter but I needed to stop it there. Thanks again for reading! :)

"You've barely even touched your salad. What's going on?"

Logan moved lettuce and chicken around with his fork for the twentieth time, not lifting any of it to his mouth. He was normally not one to dominate the conversation anyway, but even for Logan he was less than talkative.

James tried again. "Hey."

"Nothing's going on."

"Is this about your phone? Are you that attached to it?"

"No, of course not."

Logan still wouldn't look at him. Hating to broach the subject he wanted to discuss the least, James sucked it up and asked. "Is it about Kendall?"

"It's nothing."

"It is Kendall. What happened? I thought your date went well last night." James refused to think about what had occurred at the restaurant. If he did, he might have to tell Logan about it and break his friend's heart. Though maybe it would be better for Logan in the long run if Kendall hurt him now, because anyone who could kiss another man like that while dating someone as amazing as Logan obviously didn't deserve him.

"I said it was interesting."

"I took that to mean good." Had something gone wrong between them? Is that why Kendall kissed him today? Oh god, was Kendall using him to try to make Logan jealous?

"Look, the truth is...I don't know if we're gonna make it."

James bit his lip. There was so much he wanted to say to that. He went with, "Why not?"

"We just...have some issues to get past."

"You've been on two dates. Three if you count the movies, and that's still nothing. What sort of serious issues could you two possibly have after three dates?"

Now Logan looked up at him, his eyes flashing with something James had never seen in them before. Annoyance, but so much more than that. Resentment? Hatred? "It's not worth talking about."

"Oh, I think it is." James laid down his fork, no longer worried about the Thai food he'd been enjoying. "Talk to me."

Logan shook his head.

"Dude, if it's not working this early in the relationship, maybe it's not meant to be."

"Which would make you really happy, right? Since you hate him so much?"

"Hey. This isn't about me. Don't turn it into me chasing him away. Unless..." James' eyes narrowed. "Is it about me?" Had Logan noticed the way Kendall looked at him sometimes? Did Kendall say something the night before about their attraction to each other, which made no sense but was impossible to fight? When Logan continued to say nothing, James reminded him, "I just want you to be happy. If it's with Kendall, I'll deal with it."

"Is that really what you want?"

It was the second time James had been asked that in a matter of hours, and both times the answer was no. He did want Logan to be happy, but not with Kendall. Part of it was the fact that Kendall had the power to steal Logan away; part of it was that he wasn't sure of Kendall's devotion to Logan at this point. Most of it was that he wanted Kendall for himself, and that made him the worst friend in history.

He couldn't say any of that, though. What mattered was keeping Logan in his life. So in a show of support, he whipped out his phone and held it out. "Call him."

"What?"

"You put his number in my phone today for a reason, and it wasn't for my benefit. Call him. Tell him that whatever problems you two are having, you can work through them if you both want it badly enough."

"I don't want to bother him. I think he's with his family today."

James knew he was with his family. "I don't care. If you don't tell him that he's worth fighting for, you're going to lose him. And I refuse to take the blame for that. So do it. Right now. Call him."

Logan looked back at James in an agony of indecision. "I need this to work," he murmured.

"I know," James replied softly, his heart breaking a little. "Call him."

"Kendall!" Katie called out. "Phone's ringing!"

Bent over inside the refrigerator, he barely heard her. "Not now!"

"How long has this salad been in here?" his mother asked with a wrinkled nose. "It's brown."

"I forgot that was in there." Thinking it might be Logan calling to tell him he had his phone back, Kendall yelled, "Is it Logan?"

"Uh...hang on, let me..." Katie leaned toward the coffee table and picked up the vibrating phone. "It's King! Or...James?"

Both names were enough to make his heart stop. "What?"

"That's what it says! 'King or James calling'"

Kendall poked his head out of the kitchen. "That doesn't make any sense." And why would King be calling him anyway? It was most likely Logan calling from James' phone.

"Hey, don't yell at me. I'm just telling you what I saw."

"I'm sure you read it wrong." Kendall trudged into the room, holding out his hand for the phone, which had stopped vibrating seconds before. On the lock screen was a string of words that stopped his breathing:

"Missed Call King or James"

The truth rushed up at him with no warning. He felt faint.

But no. That was impossible. His phone was wrong.

With growing dread, Kendall unlocked his phone and went to the contacts page. James and King were close together alphabetically. It took less than five seconds to verify what his phone was trying to tell him.

Both contacts shared the same phone number.

How had Kendall missed that?

Oh, right. His mother had put James' number in his phone while Kendall was busy trying to fuck James into a bathroom wall. He'd never seen James' number.

His leg failed him and he sat down hard on the sofa next to Katie, the prosthetic off balance and banging into the table.

"Dude, watch it!" After another few seconds it was, "Kendall? Hey, you okay?" Then it graduated to, "Mom! Something's wrong with Kendall!"

That woke him up. "No. No, I'm fine, sorry, I...I'm gonna be sick."

His mother tried to follow him into the bathroom but he slammed the door in her face. "I'm fine, I swear!"

"Was it breakfast? Did breakfast make you sick?"

Kendall supposed that wasn't too far from the truth. "Yeah. Let me...give me a few minutes."

"Okay. Call us if you need anything!"

What Kendall needed was a place to scream. This wasn't possible. There was no way. James couldn't be...

But he could. Stepping back from the situation, Kendall saw it clearly and wondered how he'd missed it. The signs had been there from the start. He'd even pictured James in his head every time he imagined a moment with King! It made sense that he was so attracted to James. It made sense that he'd hit it off so well with King. If you took Logan out of the equation, Kendall supposed he and James might've hit it off just as nicely in person. Maybe they'd be the ones out having dates, except theirs would have most likely turned into overnighters. They'd probably fall asleep together in each others' arms the way King described, the way Kendall ached to hold a man after sex. King—and James—was everything Kendall needed in a boyfriend. Yet King was also a gay man still in the closet who was in love with his best friend and...

James is in love with Logan.

James is attracted to his best friend's boyfriend. Which is me.

James wants me to bend him over and fuck him.

"Oh my god," Kendall whispered, panic raining down over him in fat droplets that sank into his skin.

It made sense. It all made sense.

There were two things that James didn't know, though. Three, if you considered Rush's identity a secret, and he was pretty sure it still was.

James didn't know that Kendall was falling in love with him. Yes, he'd made it abundantly clear today that he was intensely attracted to James, and King knew the same. What neither knew was that Kendall's heart had been sailing closer and closer each time they spoke, so much that the night before Kendall had been tempted to beg King to come out just so they could be together. In person. For real. Especially now that he knew passion existed at the level he'd been craving, the idea of continuing to date Logan seemed like the wrong thing for both of them.

James also didn't know that Logan was in love with him. To tell James that would be to completely shut down any chance of a relationship with him—and with King. He was standing in the way of two people who loved each other and deserved to be together. Even knowing that it would leave him alone, Kendall could see no other option; he had to take himself out of the equation. He had to open their eyes.

Ironic that the person who was keeping them apart would be the one to bring them together now.

Kendall lowered the lid of the toilet and sank down slowly, resting his head in his hands. Memories and sensations of James devouring him were bittersweet now, as he knew he'd never have that again. There had been some tiny spark of hope in him after this morning that maybe it was the two of them that were meant to be together.

"You were sent here to find the guy of your dreams."

At the time Lucy said that, Kendall had thought Logan might be the one. He'd hoped, because Logan was kind. Generous. Funny. Beautiful.

He was all of the things Kendall thought he wanted in a boyfriend.

Kendall knew better now, though; yes, he needed someone who possessed the qualities Logan did, but what he needed more than anything was passion and fire. Without those two things Kendall would never be truly satisfied.

What Kendall needed was James.

"It was nice while it lasted," he said to the empty bathroom, heat rushing up through his face along with tears of emptiness and dread. He knew what he had to do.

"You're not gonna leave a voicemail?"

"No," Logan sighed, setting down James' phone next to a bright orange tray holding the food James had been picking at. "He asked for space. I need to give him that."

"It's a dick move to ignore your call. He has to know you're sitting here stressing out over this."

"I shouldn't pressure him."

"He should man up and just tell you what he wants."

"What if he doesn't know what he wants?"

Remembering the way Kendall had attacked him earlier, James stated, "He knows what he wants. Trust me. A guy like that always knows what he wants."

"Maybe I'm not the person to give it to him."

"Maybe you're scared and giving up too easily."

Logan dropped his head onto his crossed arms. "I hate this."

"I know. You gonna eat any more of that salad?"

"No."

James couldn't fight an adoring smile; Logan was precious when he moped. "Want ice cream? I'll treat."

"No thanks."

"Come on." James stood up, lifting their trays.

"Where? My phone won't be ready for another few hours."

"I know. But they did just open up a new shop downstairs I think you'll like."

Logan sat up with his lips pursed. "What store?"

"I can't remember the name. Something with the word 'brain' in it. Looked like a bunch of puzzles and books and...nerdy shit."

"That sounds like fun."

"Right? Come on, let me buy you a brain teaser."

Logan's grin was a welcome sight. "You always know how to cheer me up."

After dumping the remains of their lunch, James slid an arm around Logan's waist. "That's why you love me."

Logan didn't argue the fact. Instead, he laid his head on James' shoulder as they headed for the escalator.

James was bored within three minutes inside the store, but Logan's joy made it bearable. It was rare to see Logan get excited over toys and games, though he did have a fondness for Trivial Pursuit. That was one James suffered through only in exchange for the promise of a heated battle on the Xbox.

He was checking his display to see if the phone store had sent any updates when a text came in. Shocked because Rush had never actually texted him before, James hungrily read the message.

"Let me know when you're home so we can talk."

That sounded...almost ominous. With mounting fear, James knew what it must mean. When coupled with the earlier email, which he'd assumed meant that things were working out splendidly and that the boyfriend had in fact given Rush the sort of physical attention he needed, James realized what this was.

Rush was dumping him. Not just cutting off the sex talk, but all the talk.

His heart cracked as he spun toward a wall, making sure his back was to Logan and everyone else in the store. Not only was he about to lose Logan, but now he didn't even have Rush to help him cope. And he could only imagine the hell he would go through watching Kendall make out with Logan. There was no one to turn to.

Lucy.

Lucy would understand. He'd shoot her a text once Kendall and Logan had cleared things up between them. And after Rush broke the news, which he was determined to take with class and maturity. Rush owed him nothing. They'd just been using each other for practice, right?

You're an idiot, Diamond. You fell in love. You knew it was going nowhere and you fell in love anyway.

"Check this out! It's a maze but also a game! We have to figure out how to build the towers to get the marble to the end!"

The fake smile was plastered on his face when he turned around. "Sounds great. So this is what I'm buying you?"

Some of Logan's happiness deflated. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Why do you always think something's wrong?"

"Because I know you. Did Kendall call back?"

"No. Nothing about your phone, either."

"Okay." Logan wasn't buying it, because of course Logan was right; he knew James. "You sure you want to buy this for me?"

"And miss out on hours of fun watching you build shit if I don't? Of course I want to buy it." James snatched the box out of Logan's hand and moved to the register.

"You're gonna help me, you know."

"Which means you owe me at least an hour of fun tomorrow."

"After dinner."

"You might miss 'Jeopardy!' if we wait until then."

Logan smirked and bumped hips with James. "You're worth it."

The words helped. A little bit.

"Still nothing from Kendall?" Logan frowned as James turned onto the highway.

"He wouldn't be using my number. You told him you have your phone back, right?"

"Yeah, but he hasn't answered. I texted him."

"You should call him instead."

"He's probably busy."

"Stop being a chickenshit."

"Stop calling me names."

James shrugged. That was fair.

"Now that we're alone can we talk about whatever happened in the store that has you so upset?"

Damn Logan and his need to take care of James. It was impossible to hide anything from him.

Except the fact that you love him. And that Kendall tried to take you down in a public restroom. Definitely keeping those things from him.

"Don't tell me nothing," Logan warned. "I'm not backing off until you talk about it."

"You're annoying."

"I'm your friend. Talk to me."

James braced himself, wondering how to put it into words. "I think I'm being dumped."

A dark brow rose as Logan stared at James' profile. "Are you making fun of me?"

"No, asshole, this isn't about you! I think my...girl...is about to cut me off. Completely."

"Oh." Logan's voice was gentle when he continued. "I thought you guys weren't pursuing anything."

"We weren't, but...I don't know. I thought that we'd at least still talk, even after she found someone. She swore we'd still be friends."

"What makes you think she changed her mind?"

"She texted me and said we need to talk."

"That doesn't necessarily mean it's something bad, James."

"Oh, so if Kendall texted you those words right now, you wouldn't be worried at all."

Logan let out a sigh. "Okay, I see your point."

"It just hurts, you know? I knew we weren't gonna be together. I knew we'd probably never even meet in person. But I thought I could at least count on a friendship. Someone to talk to when I'm lonely or upset."

"You still have me."

"Yeah, but what happens if you're out on a date with Kendall and I need someone to talk to?"

"If it's serious, you know you can call me anyway."

"No way. I'm not gonna be that person who calls you and interrupts your date every five minutes just because I'm pathetic and needy. That's why I went looking for someone in the first place. To get me through nights like that."

James didn't fight it when Logan reached out for his hand. "Just because this one didn't work out, that doesn't mean the next won't."

"I know, but..." James' bottom lip trembled. "I really liked this one."

"I'm sorry."

James fought tears as he attempted to focus on the road. "Fuck you for making me cry over this."

"It's what you need to do."

"Not while I'm driving."

"Want to pull over and switch?"

"No." He pulled himself together. "Just...be there for me when I fall apart."

"Every time," Logan promised. He squeezed James' hand. "You can do the same for me when Kendall tells me he's decided against us."

"Which he won't do if you just call him and tell him what you were going to earlier."

"I basically did tell him all of that last night. The ball's in his court now."

"Look at you, using sports analogies. He's rubbing off on you."

"Yeah," Logan said sadly. "I only wish I rubbed off on him enough to give me a second chance."

"How'd you screw up the first one?"

Logan shook his head. "Not even worth getting into."

Well, there was a bright side to all of this, James supposed. At least with Kendall and Rush out of their lives, things would go back to the way they'd been before. James had missed that.

Yet at the same time, he'd learned that there were things Logan couldn't give him. Or maybe it was more accurate to say wouldn't give him. Because no matter how close they became as friends, no matter how many times Logan said he loved him, Logan would never fuck him into a wall the way Kendall had wanted to.

The way Rush would, even in the playground of James' mind.

James was really going to miss his happy place.