Edited by Cimar
DrekkDeina here.
Or over there…. I'm really not sure. I recently got my mind blown apart by a really good stack of blueberry pancakes and I think bits and pieces of said mind are all over the walls and such.
Anywho, I hope I didn't disappoint. Not gonna pretend all of you will like my style of writing or my jokes/strange plot devices, but I do hope I entertained you all the same.
If not… well better luck with the next author. XD
And now, enjoy, read, review, fav, follow, and grab that strange snack. I tried these meatballs deep fried in batter with crushed nuts in it. Rather delicious.
Now I present the finale to my little What If segment. Gestures wildely.
A fog obscured his vision, a headache coursing through him like a storm across the landscape.
Lifting his head, Nicholas tried to clear away his eyes, still adapting to the new environment and pervading pain in his cranium.
The light wasn't bright but, with his head aching as it did, the candle burning dimly felt like the glaring sun.
He was in a dirt caked room, probably underground or at least sunken into the soil. The upper half of the walls were actual wood instead of dirt and stone. Nicholas surmised this was a small room within a cellar. Only one door led out and shelves were mounted on the upper portions of the walls. Nothing was in there, but fresh drag marks on the shelves from dust said it was emptied in a hurry to hold him.
There were also indentations in the floor from crates and barrels that had been removed. All that occupied the space now was himself and a small table with the candle on it.
Before the tod could examine the room further, footsteps could be heard coming his way. He looked around in a panic, quickly trying to decide his course of action. If he pretended to be unconscious still and fight back, he might have little clue how to get out of his current predicament. Rabbit warrens were notably large and winding in design. He might get captured once more or just disposed of. Not a pretty thought. His other most prevalent option was to remain visibly awake and see if they would escort him somewhere else.
He froze. Then again, Nicholas hadn't much of a clue how he ended up here or if this was even a rabbit's warren.
The red fox decided the latter course of action was best. At least he could learn something or delay until he had a more solid plan.
The sound of a large wooden bar being lifted from the outside tickled Nicholas's ears. A couple errant grunts joined the mix, with the door shaking on its old hinges.
The door swung open to reveal a few younger bucks and one older, heavily disgruntled one. The younger ones all had pitchforks or rifles trained in his direction, looking for any excuse to 'defend' themselves.
"So, you're awake," he gruffly mentioned, more to himself than anyone else. "You have some nerve, taking my daughter hostage and trespassing our land."
"I was only transporting a correspondence to my troops," the tod began to explain, quickly piecing together something that left out Judith's involvement in hurting and helping him. "Your daughter was in the line of fire, for reasons I haven't the slightest clue, and I tried to escort her back to the house."
The older bunny pulled out an envelope, the wax seal broken on it. He waved it around with a smug expression. Flipping open the flap and taking out the letter, he unfolded it to read it aloud. Nicholas stepped forward reflexively, feeling dutiful obligation to protect the information.
He gulped when every armed rabbit narrowed their eyes in warning, tightening their hold on their respective arms aiming more accurately on the fox. A familiar click sounded as Nicholas looked down to see his own service revolver being lazily aimed at his abdomen by the cantankerous old bunny. With his paws up in surrender, the tod slowly stepped back again.
Clearing his throat, the patriarch Hopps began to read, "Dear Major Lionheart, it appears that the rebel scum has raided our latest supply convoy and stolen a fair amount of our new explosive ordinance for cannons. Be warned of the danger and try to plan accordingly. Signed… some mammal I don't care about." While the last part was obviously not to script, the information did make the fox feel a sense of failure. It was too late to matter telling anyone now, if the barn exploding was any indication of that fact.
Upon remaining silent, the elder bunny chose to speak once more, "If I even believed you were 'saving' my daughter, which I don't, it doesn't change the fact you are with the North. We're not exactly on their side and I'm not letting even one of their troops go back. You'll be hanged later." As if that were the final word, he left, taking his entourage of sons with him.
He mumbled something to the effect of 'No northern fox cur touches my daughter and gets away with it…' as he walked away and around the corner. The door was once again barred shut.
Nicholas probably should've felt some burgeoning sense of horror bearing down upon him, but all he felt was an empty pit at having failed at every turn. Shot by a rabbit in defense of her farm, delayed from delivering his correspondence and possibly labeled as a deserter, and now sentenced to death outside legal boundaries by a family whose loyalties lie with the opposing side.
As if on cue at the peak of his disparaging thoughts, the bar scraped the door on the other side as it was lifted. Small grunts and other such sounds leaked through the door, several seconds passing by before the door finally opened to reveal a smaller, panting rabbit in very loose overalls and a straw hat pulled low on their face. A glint of violet caught the red fox's eye.
He remained silent, taking in the tray of food the buck appeared to be carrying. The tod then eyed the open door, seeing an opportunity to just walk out. There didn't appear to be anyone guarding the door. The fox could only assume they thought the bar would do. His nose twitched as he caught a most familiar scent, rolling his eyes in response as he smiled. Tilting his head, Nicholas stared with a contemplative look at the smaller 'buck' in his presence.
"Who do you think you're fooling with that get up?" he bluntly inquired, watching in slight amusement as Judith tensed up upon setting the tray down on the table.
"Well not you… that's for certain," she sighed. "How did you know?" the grey doe removed her straw hat, tossing it aside for the time being.
"Well most 'bucks' don't have hips like yours, loose clothing or not," jibed Nicholas, feeling a sense of humor returning. Judith placed her paws on her hips, as if somehow covering her shame. The tod laughed in kind to her reaction. "Also, your scent is something I've come to know for the past week and such. Hard to miss now that I have it imprinted in my memory." The bunny's ears perked and her face twisted in an odd expression.
"I thought one could only imprint on a fox through something familial…" she began, seeing the red fox open his maw to say something, before she continued, "...or a potential mate." Nicholas went eerily quiet and closed his mouth, turning to the side and averting his eyes.
"What are you here for?" he deflected, ears flicking in annoyance, whether at himself or Judith was unclear. "I doubt you're going to try sneaking me out past what I would guess is half your siblings."
"No…" the doe breathed. "I had a different idea, but I need your help to pull it off." The tod knelt down, plucking a biscuit from the tray and giving it an aggressive tear with his teeth.
"Prey tell, funny bunny," Nicholas snarked. "What could I possibly do for you?"
"Get hanged."
Instead of gagging, sputtering, or showing any real dramatic reaction to the statement, the red fox tod barked out a short laugh and set the remains of his unfinished biscuit down, eyeing the violet orbs of the grey bunny with a devious grin.
"I'm all ears, Sweetheart."
Nicholas did not feel as strangely confident as he did before about his involvement in the supposed plan that Judith had concocted. Too many things could go wrong and too many factors were dependent on him trusting her beyond what he usually could muster in that respect.
The red fox was being escorted through the warren by two bucks, with a few others bringing up the rear, guns pointed at his back. His paws were bound from the front, another rabbit tugging at a rope attached to the bindings and walking just forward of him. For the bunny doe's plan to work, he couldn't resist in the slightest. That might make her siblings or father suspend all due ceremony and just shoot him. The hanging would be a public spectacle and that meant everyone was watching.
He gulped and tried to walk slower, earning himself a prod in the back with a rifle from behind.
"Easy on the back!" he shot back, briefly disarming the offending buck… metaphorically. "If I'm going to die, I'd like to do so in pristine condition." Surprisingly, the bunny buck backed off and gave him leeway enough to not be stabbed by a rifle barrel. "Thanks," the fox murmured with sincerity.
After several minutes, many twists and turns through the underground tunnels, and the many treading steps from dirt caked burrows to more civilized constructed flooring, Nicholas finally saw the shreds of sunlight from outside. From the angle on the floor and ambient light outside, he assumed it was near high noon, if not a little before.
He didn't get to enjoy the indoor decorum of the homestead for long, being shoved out into the open via a side door, leading into an open clearing with a well constructed gallows displayed in the open, with an overhanging tree providing shade. The tod figured it would look hastily made and poorly crafted. It was actually quite meticulously done, though that sentiment did nothing to dissuade the lump in his throat.
"You guys work fast, huh?" Nicholas snarked with a nervous chuckle. "My guys can't even pitch a tent without spending hours arguing over where to put the darn stakes."
"Families as big as ours can usually construct something pretty quick when we need it," a buck to his side said plainly.
"And you consider this a necessity…?" the tod inquired, nodding sarcastically.
"Just get up there," another rabbit ordered.
The red fox complied, though trepidatiously so, trudging up the steps and taking his position over the trap door. Another bunny stepped up to a stool, to reach his neck, and roped the noose around it.
"Ugh… I hate neckwear," Nicholas muttered. "I imagine this is how some mammals who hate wearing ties feel like. I like it a little loose." The tod barked a laugh. "Ha! Loose the noose."
In response, as if to spite him, the rabbit getting him all set up tightened the rope around his neck.
Looking around, Nicholas could see the damage from the attempted night raid. It was unclear who actually won the night, with equal spots of Southern gray uniforms contrasting the Northern blues lying across the battlefield. Smoke billowed from the remains of the burnt out barn that was hit, while smoldering spots pitted the fields around the decimated structure.
A group of bunnies was gathering, mainly consisting of the males and a few of the older females. No kits were present, as far as Nicholas could see. That was one good sign. Wouldn't be very nice to make kits witness this type of thing as some sort of entertainment or rite of passage.
Either way, Nicholas's eyes were able to make flickering looks up to the overhanging tree. While he couldn't see what the bunny had set up for her plan, he could see the glint of her amethyst eyes with his cursory glance. She was there, waiting in the tree.
"Now then," a voice cut through the murmur of the gathering, "I, Stuart Hopps, am here to condemn this trespasser to death by hanging." The fox couldn't resist, clearing his throat and cutting off the older rabbit.
"What a coincidence!" Nicholas exclaimed. "My name is Stuart, too! Stuart Pidd, but you can call me Stu for short."
"Stu…. Pidd?" the elder buck said slowly in inquiry. "Stu Pidd…" A disturbing scowl warped the features on his muzzle, paw gripping the lever to the trapdoor and bracing it with a venomous stare towards the fox that ired him so. "Anymore jokes, fox?"
"Well actually I have one mo…"
Stuart pulled the lever back with a deadpan expression, clearly done with the tod's antics.
The trapdoor released and dropped Nicholas through the gap, with him bracing for the inevitable…
There was a pull and a snap.
"Oh by the blazes it worked!" the red fox bellowed with a pervading sense of relief. All in audience to the happenstance were justly confused. Nicholas, however, wasted no time, taking the knife tucked in a hollow behind a support and cut his bindings from his wrists.
Judith had worn down and pre cut the rope used for his hanging, making it so that a sufficient force would instantly snap it. All he felt was a slight tug on his neck until only a few pounds of force strained what was left from near the source to break.
Looking up above, he saw the grey doe sling down on a rope of her own, the force of which was pulling several small strings and unraveling sacks hanging from various branches. Bursting forth from the sacks, was flour. With a moderate breeze and the height they were placed, the flour exploded outwards in a white cloud.
The swinging bunny let go of her rope on its downward arc and rolled under the gallows' decking with Nicholas.
"That should cover us," Judith told him, looking him up and down. "So, we won't have to outrun them too hard with your recovering wound. Now, let's go." The tod nodded and both took off.
The flour 'smoke' cloud covered the area, with various rabbits yelling and rushing around to find the fox. Looking back, he saw the encompassing cloud was quite dense and far stretched.
"Goodness," he breathed. "How much flour did you use and how did you get them up there?" Nicholas breathed steadily, his wound aching but not threatening to open up. He felt he was keeping a good pace, though he knew that once they were out of danger, he was going to collapse with a purpose.
"I honestly don't remember, but each bag was like… twenty-five pounds?" the doe panted while running alongside him. "I spent all night stringing them up. Just glad my family was too scared to come outside and see me, with that battle going on."
They cut through the dirt roads nearby and made their way into the corn fields that stood tall. It would be easiest to lose their tail in there and avoid being shot, at least for Nicholas. He wasn't even sure why Judith was accompanying him. It wasn't like they knew it was her who did all this. She was the victim to her father.
"Why are you coming with me?" the red fox asked, with the two running at a far less frantic pace. With how far away all the shouting sounded, it appeared that they were unseen in their escape. Flour in the eyes must be pretty uncomfortable, he wanted to surmise.
"Why do I need a reason?" the fiery bunny sassed back at him. "Maybe a doe wants a little adventure."
"Fair enough."
The rest of their run was made in relative quiet. It wasn't too long, thankfully for Nicholas's aching side, before the duo reached a river with a rather steady flow and steep banks. There was a small raft down by the bank, tied to a large stone and bobbing with the current.
"Our chariot awaits," Judith stated between heaving breaths. "I know it's not exactly…"
"...a real boat?" the red fox tod finished for her. She nodded with a shrug. "Yeah, I've slept on a literal bed of dirt and moss. As long as I can collapse on that thing in peace, I only care that it floats." Gesturing to the craft, the fox and rabbit boarded it without another second's delay.
It was old looking but sturdy as well, with tied together logs and a short mast protruding from the center. The mast had a small canvas rolled up on the boom, looking more worn than the raft. A small rudder bobbed at the rear, waiting for a mammal to pilot it. The tod assumed it was used to traverse the river from bank to bank.
Disengaging from the coast, both mammals began to steady themselves on either side, letting the current take them downriver.
As he had claimed, Nicholas collapsed in a heap on his back, heaving and holding his side.
"I'm sorry," the doe vented out in a flushed breath. "I know you still need to heal."
"Well… a broken neck has a pretty long recovery time by comparison, so, I'm fine with this."
Judith began to snicker and giggle, a much warmer smile light up her face than the previous several days combined. It spread like a welcome infection to the tod's muzzle, making him smile as well.
"So," he began, "what now for you?"
"Pfft…" came the odd noise, her mind now clear enough to think that possibility through. "I have no clue. Once my family figures out I did all this, I'll either be disowned or trapped in that house forever. I'm not entertaining either of those ends… so… anything else. You?"
"Well," Nicholas started, "I'm pretty sure by now, that I'm either labeled as a deserter or just dead. Maybe both. My superiors never really liked me anyways. I think I'll shed this uniform and huff it with you, if you're willing."
"I'll agree to that, on one condition."
The red fox groaned, "What would that be?" He closed his eyes for a brief moment, expecting to hear some strange but possibly reasonable demands.
The tod was shocked into opening his eyes rather abruptly, when the grey doe cast a shadow over him, pressing her lips to his in a short kiss. If he hadn't been lying down, Nicholas might have needed the respite, with the way he felt breathless.
Judith leaned back, sitting with her legs together and eyes giving him a curious look of expectation. Not wanting to disappoint, the tod leaned up, supporting himself on his elbows and gave the violet eyed bunny a roguish, lopsided grin.
"Are you saying…"
"Yes."
"And now you want…"
"Yes."
"So, does that make us…"
"Nope."
"What?" the fox sputtered in disbelief. "But… you just kissed me."
"Oh, don't get me wrong," the grey doe told him, "I do think you are rather… handsome, but I'm not that easy. You have to work for it."
Nicholas flopped back onto the raft with a groaning sigh.
"You are a demon and an angel." Her warm laugh followed, joining the calming sound of the water, as it flowed and sparkled in the sunlight.
"Yeah, but I'd like to think I'm…"
"Worth it," the red fox tod finished. "Yes… yes you are. Now where is this thing heading?"
"I have absolutely no clue," Judith unabashedly admitted.
"Of course," Nicholas replied with all due sass, the two contentedly smiling as the raft drifted almost aimlessly along the river.
The simulation ended and both fox and bunny lifted off the headsets to stare in silent contentedness.
"You were very sweet and sour in that one," Nick mentioned bluntly.
"Shut up, you're making me hungry," Judy told him, grabbing her fox's paw.
She saw him tugging at his tie for a few seconds as they got out of the P.I.X.A.R. machine.
"Why are you doing that?" she asked simply, raising a brow.
"I suddenly feel the urge to not wear this thing now…" was the tod's murmured response. "But… uh… food? Right. I know a place."
"Ugh… no, Nick. Not another one of your 'friends'. Last one was a bit iffy and I am pretty sure I got food poisoning from them."
"Fine," relented the red fox. "What do you want?"
"Brownies…" Judy said, nearly drooling.
"Brownies? For a meal?"
She locked her gaze with his, sternly boring her violet stare with his emerald one.
"Brownies."
Nick let out a deep breath, saying, "Brownies it is."