What If? – Competitive Much? Chapter 1
Written by MidnightOpheliac
Edited by Cimar
AN: Hey loves, MidnightOpheliac here. This is my second piece for the collab and I hope you'll enjoy it. Writing our favourite pair playing Pawnopoly was seriously tough, there was a lot of elements to consider that I hadn't thought of before! I mocked up the board so you can get a basic idea of what's going on and/or follow along too.
This is my last entry for this project, so I want to thank everyone for reading! I also want to give a special thank you to Cimar for inviting me to be part of such an awesome collab. Its been a joy to step away from my usual work and try something new. :)
"Really, Slick?" Judy sighed, removing her vest and belt now that she and Nick were home. It had been a long day, the pair of them forced to catch up on all the paperwork they'd been neglecting for the past two weeks. All Judy wanted to do was have dinner, watch a bit of mindless television, and fall asleep. Instead, her fox had decided that tonight would be board game night. She'd only suggested it in passing a month ago, but Nick had latched onto the idea. Judy figured he wanted them to have some weekly tradition.
Undoing his tie, Nick removed it from around his neck, making his way to their bedroom to hang it up and change. Before he'd met Judy, he would've just left his clothes on the ratty couch in his old basement apartment, but since they'd moved in together, had a lovely home, and he didn't want to incur his wife's wrath, Nick was more than willing to be a tidy fox. "Hey, board game night was your idea, and you decided to let me pick first. Pawnopoly is my choice."
Large ears honed in Nick's voice as he moved their apartment, Judy rolled her eyes. He was right. "Urgh, fine." She conceded, grabbing the old game out from the cupboard in the dining room. Placing it down on the coffee table, she passed Nick on her way to their bedroom, now sporting his usual home attire of sweatpants and t-shirt. "You set up; I need to change."
"Yes dear." Nick couldn't resist the playful jibe, grinning as he heard Judy muttering under her breath as she entered their bedroom something about 'stupid handsome fox.'
Returning to the living room once she'd changed out of her work clothes, Judy took her seat on one side of the coffee table. Nick had cleared the surface and set up the board for them. "Alright, who's the banker?"
"You can be, Fluff." Lazy grin firmly in place, Nick wasn't phased about who took on the role. It was less work for him if he passed it on to Judy. "What does the winner get?"
Confused, Judy stopped sorting out the money, staring at Nick like he had two heads. "What do you mean what do they get? They get boasting rights."
"I think the winner should get to dare the loser into doing something." Countless ideas raced through the tod's mind, the chance to push his wife out of her comfort zone too great to miss. He'd always been the rebellious one; it was time for the tables to turn.
Rolling her eyes, Judy shook her head. "What are we, kits?"
"If you don't think you can handle it, Fluff, then that's cool." Nick leaned back, resting against the couch. He knew his bunny. She would bite.
Scowling, Judy threw Nick's starting money down onto the board in front of him. "Of course I can handle it!"
"In that case, if I win you have to switch out Buffalo Butt's glasses to ones that'll make it even harder for him to see." As much as Nick wanted to make Judy the subject of his torment, he knew the doe would give him the cold shoulder for weeks if he had her do something embarrassing. Wolford had given him a golden piece of advice before he'd married the rabbit sat opposite him – 'happy wife, happy life.'
Placing down her pile of money in front of her, Judy reached out to collect the player tokens from the box. "That's cruel."
"Yes, but it'll be funny to see him get angry about the fact his briefing is suddenly blurry when it was fine the day before." It wasn't one of Nick's most creative dares, but he would start Judy off small. The buffalo wouldn't suspect that goody-goody Judy Wilde would pull such a trick on him.
Thinking of her dare in return, the doe finally settled on one she knew would annoy her fox. "Fine. If I win, you have to tell Clawhauser that you were the one who broke his beloved Gazelle mug. You'll learn honesty somehow, Mr. Wilde."
"I'm a fox, honesty isn't in my nature." The tod pointed out, finding Judy's dare adorable. Sure Clawhauser would be mad at him if he found out, but a few doughnuts and the big cat would be okay. Not that Nick intended to lose anyway. Pawnopoly was all about making money, and if there was any mammal in the city of Zootopia who excelled at that, it was him.
"We'll see about that." Judy offered out the player tokens and wasn't surprised when Nick picked the fox shaped counter. She went for the rabbit one, placing it on the 'Go' square next to Nick's. Depositing the other tokens back into the box, she offered her mate the dice.
Holding up a paw, the tod shook his head. "No no, ladies first." He insisted, his mom having raised a gentlemammal.
Giving the dice a shake, Judy threw them down onto the board, rolling a six. Moving her counter, she landed on Rocky Road. Contemplating what to do, Judy ultimately decided she didn't want to buy it. "I'll pass."
"You know that means it goes up for auction, right?" Pawnopoly had been one of his favorite pastimes when he and Finnick had been kicking back in the van. Sometimes they'd had to lay low for a day or two to throw the cops off their tails, but the urge to make money and hustle never went away, even if it was fake money.
Making the first bid was always difficult, so Judy settled on a third of the properties value. "Bidding opens at $50."
Pursing his lips, Nick worked out how much he could afford. He was yet to have a turn, but his long-standing strategy with this game was to buy as much of the board as possible during the first few rounds. "$110." He countered.
Debating whether it was worth it or not, Judy shook her head. She was focusing her attention on the higher-valued properties, wanting to snap them up and put hotels on them to cripple Nick financially. The tod handed her $110, which she put in the bank, giving him the property card in return.
Pleased with his purchase, Nick scooped up the dice, chucking them down onto the board. Reaching for his counter, he moved it seven spaces along, landing on Chance. Cautiously he picked up a card from the middle of the board, relieved to find he was being sent to the nearest railway station. Moving his fox token to Savannah Central, Nick paid the $300 to own it.
"You sure you have the right strategy here, Slick?" Judy questioned, reaching for the dice in anticipation of her turn.
Nudging the dice towards the doe, Nick shook his head. "You just play the game your way, and I'll play it mine, Carrots."
"You must really want to tell Clawhauser about his mug." The rabbit teased, hiding her smile.
Finding Judy's attempt at riling him up adorable, Nick leaned across the coffee table, his arms resting on the edge of it as his lips curved into a smirk. "Are you questioning your former hustler of a husband's decision-making process when making money is involved?"
"Touché." Judy shook the dice in her paw, throwing them down onto the board. She couldn't argue with Nick's point. Hustling had been his forte, and very lucrative for him. How on earth she'd managed to convince him to swap it for an honest, lower-paying civil servant job she would never know. Rolling a five, Judy moved her counter to Olive Street, deciding to buy it.
Nick rolled, this time getting a seven, and once again landing on Chance. "Bank pays me $50." He turned the card to show Judy, holding out his other paw for the cash.
Scowling, Judy handed over the money from the bank. "Bank's giving out free money, as if." She muttered, snatching up the dice. Letting them land on the board as Nick put the chance card at the bottom of the pile, the doe groaned when she moved her token the required four spaces and ended up on Savannah Central. "You've got to be kidding me." She'd thought she had been lucky rolling doubles, but having to hand over $25 to her smug fox was annoying. Swiping up the dice she gave them a shake, throwing them again. Moving her counter eleven spaces, Judy landed on Cloud Alley. Without giving it a second thought, she purchased it.
"Now she wants to buy property." Nick teased, picking up the dice.
Judy wasn't about to let the tod own more of the board than her. Whenever he bought, she'd match him. There was no way on earth she was going to lose. "You forced my paw, Wilde."
"I couldn't force you to do anything, my dear, sweet wife." The tod started to shake the dice in his paw, more focused on the rabbit opposite him than the game for the time being.
Nick was smart, making money was something he was good at, and tricking other mammals into handing it over was like taking candy from a kit for him. Judy refused to fall foul of his tactics. "Stop trying to suck up to me, I'm not going easy on you."
"You never do." Nick acquiesced, rolling a seven, which took him to Tujunga. "Oh, it would be criminal not to buy this one." He handed over the required monetary amount, taking the property card from his rabbit. "Remind me again how not to pronounce it?"
A small noise of irritation slipped past Judy's lips as she folded her arms over her chest. "I was new to the city."
Lifting a paw to his chest, Nick adopted a playfully mocking tone. "My little country dumpling. So small and naïve."
"I can still kick your tail, Wilde." The doe pointed out, knowing he had seen the video of her taking down a rhino when she'd been enrolled at the ZPA. Major Friedkin had made it part of the introduction video to the boxing classes.
Paw falling from his chest, Nick lazily reclined against the couch, head tipping sideways as he observed his mate, the corners of his lips quirking into a smile. "You wouldn't. See Fluff, I know you better than anybody else."
"If you continue to buy the properties in the colors I want, then yes, yes I will." Judy huffed, her arms still folded over her chest. She was hoping that by working the angry wife routine, he'd let her win.
Chuckling, it now made sense. "Ah, so that's what this is about. What can I say; it's the luck of the roll. Maybe if you ask nicely, I'll sell it to you later on." Nick winked, pushing the buttons he knew would frustrate his wife further. As much as he loved her, the hustler in him refused to back down even if it were only fake money involved.
"Maybe I'll just tell mom to stop sending over her blueberry care packages every month." Judy pulled out the big guns, picking on Nick's ultimate weakness.
Caught off guard by the sudden threat, Nick's jaw dropped. He couldn't think of anything worse, save something happening to Judy. "You wouldn't dare."
"Try me." The doe challenged, rolling the dice. Moving her counter five spaces along to Haymarket, Judy decided to pass. As she passed, the property went up for auction, and Nick paid the original price of $300 for it. Stealing a glance at the tod's financial situation, Judy was relieved to find he had less cash than her. She would let him spend all his money on property, buying one of every color he purchased herself. That way, he couldn't put houses or hotels on them, and then when he kept landing on her full sets and having to part with cash, she'd offer him a deal for some of his locations.
Rolling a seven, Nick landed on 'Chance' again, this time having to move back three spaces. The 'Community Chest' card he picked up made him nervous, but as he turned it over to see he owed street repairs on all houses and hotels, he breathed a sigh of relief. He didn't have any of those yet.
Taking her turn, Judy moved her counter nine spaces, landing on Go. The rules stipulated that she received double the money, and she purposefully counted it out from the bank slowly, making sure Nick could see her growing pile of cash.
"If only you were this slow when driving." Nick couldn't resist the jibe. He'd lost count of the number of times his wife had slammed on the brakes suddenly and sent him flying towards the dashboard.
Nick didn't complain about much in their life, but he enjoyed whining about her driving whenever he had the chance, yet he never accepted her offer for him to drive. Therefore, in Judy's head, he had no room to complain. "I'm a lovely driver."
"A wonderfully bad one. Remember when you ran out of road?" That was one of Nick's top five most terrifying days at work. They'd been chasing a street racer through the Meadowlands when the road had gone from three lanes to two. The lane they'd been in had suddenly ended, and Judy had been forced to shove another car out of the way to stop them hitting the median strip.
Embarrassed that Nick had brought that up, Judy scowled, finishing counting out her cash. "That was one time!" She lifted her gaze from the money to find the tod's emerald eyes. "Would you like to walk tomorrow 'cause I can arrange that? All those doughnuts you keep stealing from Clawhauser are starting to show." She gave as good as she got.
Paw coming to his heart, Nick gasped in mock offense. "Oh ouch Fluff, you wound me! That's just my winter coat, and I know how familiar you are with it." He winked, letting his paw fall to the table.
Judy didn't need the reminder of how fluffy Nick's winter coat was. It was perfect for snuggling into when it was cold out. Feeling flustered, she scoffed. "I will not let you distract me with dirty talk." Unfortunately, she didn't sound convincing.
"Sure, don't let me get in the way of you winning." He reclined, noticing smugly that he had thrown her a little. Taking the dice, the tod rolled a seven and victoriously moved his token to join Judy's on the Go square, earning double.
Jaw dropping; disbelief crossed the doe's face. "I demand that you re-roll. That was rigged."
Confused, the tod snorted. "How can it be rigged, Fluff?" He questioned. Pawnopoly was one of the hardest games to cheat at.
"I don't know, but it is. The dice must be weighted or something." Judy didn't need Nick earning more money and then using it to snap up more of the board. She needed to keep him poor and with as few properties as possible. It was her only way of winning against him.
Eyebrow lifting, Nick licked his lips, trying his hardest not to laugh. "You're clutching, Carrots."
Grumbling, Judy handed over Nick's money before her turn. "I'll show you clutching." Judy rolled a two, landing on Community Chest. Picking up the top card, she turned it over, and her heart sank. "You've got to be kidding me! This game is totally rigged!" She seethed.
Taking the card from Judy, Nick read it, unable to stop his laughter this time. "Go directly to jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200." He picked up Judy's token, moving it to the prison space. "The law abiding bunny is in the slammer." He placed the card at the bottom of the pile, gaze lifting to find Judy scowling at him, eyebrows drawn together and jaw clenched. She was getting more and more worked up. The tod hadn't realized how seriously Judy took board games, or he would've suggested something a little lighter like Eels and Escalators. Nick was sure in his strategy and ability to make money, even fake money, so little fazed him, but Judy was taking this very seriously.
Unbelieving that she was having such a run of bad luck when rabbits were supposed to be lucky, the doe lifted a paw to point the finger at her fox. "I'm blaming you." She was a little angry with the turn of events, but it didn't hurt to amp it up a bit in the hope of tricking her husband into letting her win.
"Me? What did I do?" Nick's paw came back up to his chest as he frowned, lips pursed in reflection.
"You suggested this game!" Judy declared as if it were obvious, dropping her paw to the table, careful not to disrupt the board.
Eyes widening, Nick's lips parted as he leaned forward. "You think the game and I conspired against you?"
"Maybe." The bunny crossed her arms over her chest.
"Oh my sweet wife, you're too adorable." Nick cooed, knowing he had to try and salvage their conversation before Judy became too irate. "Tell you what, I'll be a good husband and post your bail." Leaning over, he placed $50 from his pile of money into the bank, planting a tender kiss on Judy's cheek as he sat back. It did the trick, Judy's shoulders dropped, and her arms unfolded, a small smile weaving its way onto her lips as she touched her cheek. The tod still wasn't going to go easy on her, but it paid to be sweet every now and then. "Happy wife, happy life, Wilde."