It was Valentine's Day and Barron Trump was sweating profusely. His mother had set him up for a date for the White House's Valentine's Day Ball. He was anxiously waiting in the front entryway looking around for his special little lady. He had no idea who it was, his mother insisted to keep it a surprise, but that couldn't keep Barron's hands from shaking. He sipped his punch and glanced around at the guests attending the party. Everyone was dressed in fancy clothes and made polite chit-chat. He slumped in his chair, "This is the most boring thing ever, I just want my 3DS right now." While Barron was dwelling in his misery, he didn't notice a girl approaching him.

"Hello Barron, it's me I'm here." Barron jumped up in surprise eyeing his date. She was a strange looking girl, she was tall with long blue hair, Barron couldn't tell her age as her face was heavily caked in makeup. She wore long black gloves up to her shoulders which was covered with a long black dress. In fact the only skin you could see was her neck up. She held a fancy black purse in one hand that looked quite expensive. Her eyes were dark and bloodshot, as if she hadn't slept in days. "My name is Isabela Hopkin, I'm pleased to make your acquaintance." She said in a creaky voice. She stretched out her hand for Barron to kiss, but he just stood there dumbfounded.

"How old are you anyway?" Barron bluntly asked.

A flash of anger shown in Isabela's eyes but it quickly vanished replaced by a cold look. "Why I'm 10 years old. Isn't it obvious?"

"Sorry I really couldn't tell, your face is very...timeless." Isabela silently stared at Barron for awhile until he became uncomfortable. "Erm, would you like to go into ball room?" Isabela nodded and with out saying anything grabbed Barron's hand. Immediately Barron went rigid feeling very awkward about the sudden contact.

"Lead the way sir," Isabela said curtly. Barron shuddered and slowly pushed his way through the crowd of people, he tried to release his hand but Isabela's gripe was a strong as iron. When they went into the ball room Barron looked around the dancing to see where his parents were, but they could not be seen. 'I'll make sure mother will hear about all the emotional distress that she has caused me, and I hope this will never happen again.' When Barron passed by the food table Isabela finally let go. She meandered over to the elaborate setup and set her purse on the table. She reached over and picked out a huge chunk of meat. Her fair poise evaporated in an instant, she devoured the flesh as if she was a wild beats tearing off bits with her teeth. Meat juice squirted out and started running down her chin, but it was as if she didn't even notice. Barron hastily grabbed some napkins and shoved them into her hands, as she was starting to make a scene. She stared at the napkins for a moment, then it seemed that she woke up from a dream. Her eyes her eyes became clear and she became aware of her surroundings. She looked around at the horrified faces and surprisingly she sneered, "What're you looking at?" Barron stood back mortified, hoping no one would think she was his date. Once again Isabela turned around and grabbed his hand pulling him away from the crowd of people and into a shadowy corner, leaving her purse behind.

They sat there awhile out of sight, but suddenly the music changed. Instead of the usual club dance music that had been going on all night they were playing a romantic slow song. Isabela looked up at Barron expectantly, which made Barron want to crawl in a hole and die. Eventually the dominant Isabela grabbed Barron's dainty hands and hauled him on to the crowded dance floor accidently knocking into several couples. They angrily grumbled to themselves as they moved away from the two kids. Isabela guided Barron's hesitant hands to her waist, while her large manish hands rested on his neck. They stared into each other's eyes as they slowly swayed to the song. This was the most awkward Barron had ever felt in his entire life. The longer he spent dancing the worse it became, Isabela's eyes bore deep into Barron's as if she was trying to read his mind. After a few minutes of dancing Isabela smirked. "It's funny how cute you can be when you're embarrassed."

"What makes you say that?" Barron asked hesitantly.

"Well the way you've been acting around me, like I'm some sort of crazy person."

Barron was taken aback by the conviction, then he felt shame. "I'm sorry if I mad you feel bad, it wasn't my intention."

Isabela shrugged her shoulders and said, "Well I can't exactly say I'm like most girls."

"What makes you say that?" Barron asked. Though in his mind he couldn't agree more.

Isabela glanced left and right to see if anyone was around then looked back at Barron, a devilish smile creeping on her face. Barron had a suddenly had a bad feeling as if something bad was gonna happen. Isabela eyes seemed to glow red as she leaned forward to Barron's Ear. "Why that's because I'm Hillary Clinton." Barron jumped back staring at Isabela with horror about to shout, but it was too late. To the left a massive explosion erupted throwing easily Barron off his feet and into the wall. immediately screams filled the room and body parts littered the floor. Barron's ears were ringing and he was very dizzy. He felt his nose and it came back red with blood. He then realized that Hillary wasn't with him he turned his head just in time to see her disappear around the corner. He would not her escape, he hauled himself to his feet and nearly vomited from the pain. His vision swam and the cries of the wounded filled his ears. He grabbed a handgun from a dead guard and set off to apprehend Hillary. He wobbled down the hall as fast as he could, leaving a trail of blood in his wake. When ever he turned into a new corridor he could see a glimpse of her before she turned the corner. Which fueled his rage and made him walk even faster. He knew that he was in a private part of the White House where many government secrets were kept. So it was area that Barron rarely had the privilege of traveling in, but Hillary on the other hand was well adapted to these halls. Barron turned a corner only to find that Hillary had disappeared. Barron punched the wall angrily, 'okay Barron she's just in one of these rooms right?' Barron then proceeded to look throughout each room, until he came upon a door that was locked. He furiously pounded on the door and screeched, "OPEN THE DOOR HILLARY!" There was no response, Barron took out the handgun and shot out the lock. He rammed the door with his shoulder bursting into the dark room.

There stood the snake Hillary in all her in godly glory, she had abandoned her hideous disguise and was now in her true form. Immediately Barron opened fire but due to Hillary's demon like reflexes and Barron's injured arm she managed to dodge every bullet, also the fact that Barron's gun training had come from video games. Barron ran out of bullets and threw the gun at Hillary, she easily caught it and crushed it into a lump of metal with one hand. Barron took a step back stunned at the action that just transpired. That's when Barron finally noticed that Hillary was clutching a file of papers close to chest, he glanced to the side and realized that one of the many filing cabinets was open. "What do you have there?" Barron hissed.

"Oh, this?" Hillary replied smugly tossing the file from hand to hand. "Why it's the nuclear launch codes my dear boy. With these bad boys I'll be able to theoretically hold the entire Earth hostage. This is how I'll come back from my fall of grace."

"NO," Barron screamed. He lunged forward to grab the file, but Hillary reached behind her and picked up a gun and pointed it at Barron.

"Not another step or you'll be missing a couple body parts." Barron immediately put his hands up and backed up against the wall. Hillary grinned and pointed the gun away from Barron. "What a good little boy." Suddenly a low rumbling noise filled the air. "Oh looks like my ride's here!" The room's ceiling ripped away to reveal a large black helicopter silently hovering the White House. A long rope ladder was thrown off the side of the helicopter and the end landed in the room. Hillary stepped onto the ladder and let out a witch like cackle. "See you around Barron, work on your social skills you were a boring date." The helicopter rose into the air and flew off into the night sky. Hillary's laughter echoing in Barron's brain.

This is satire, if there's a US government official reading this, this is a joke. I'm not gonna attack the White House or anyone. Trump isn't that bad of a president.

Love, Jiggly Booty