Blue Eggs and Ham

[DAY 3]

"Pah! Here comes the princess of the European Division." Spat a man with slicked back hair, olive skin and a permanent scowl on his face. He wore a striped collared shirt with its sleeves rolled up and a red tie. Tan coloured slacks covered his legs, and black and white brogue shoes encased his feet. Agent Santiago stood blocking the front of the room's doorway.

Mildly amused, Giorgio answered. "Make yourself scarce then, I don't mingle with peasants."

"I don't like your tone." Snapped Santiago.

"Well, I don't like your disgusting shoes. Tough shit." Giorgio shot back.

"Bah!" The aggressive agent spat and entered the room.

"What's that guy's problem?" Asked Evan. "Do you know him?"

"Barely." Replied Giorgio. "I think... He's the current rank 1 in Spain and rank 3 in Europe."

"Ohhh. What rank are you, your majesty?" The blonde asked playfully.

"I'm the rank 5 in Italy, and the rank 11 in Europe." He answered.

"Woah nice! Maybe that guy feels threatened by you." Exclaimed Evan. "So I need to at least beat 11..." He grinned as he entered the room.

"In your dreams, knave." The brunette replied. Giorgio rested his hands in his pockets, and felt something with his left hand. Hm? He pulled out a wrapped coffee lolly. Where… are these even coming from? I don't buy candy. Putting it away, he entered what was essentially a classroom for a lecture on team dynamics newly paired agents were to attend.

"Ladies and Gentleman, some of you may already know me as the resident psychologist. For those who do not, I am Dr Grace Fine- do come to me if you are ever traumatised." Greeted a mousey, smartly dressed woman in glasses. "Ahem. Following the success of pairs which proceeded with what we have dubbed 'warm bonding', we've found greater rates of synergy, mental health, and as an effect of the two- better mission performance." She announced happily.

"Excuse me frau Doktor." Asked a heavily German-accented voice, interested. "How must we do zis thing?"

"Oh! Thank you so much for asking. The terminology is a bit fancy, but all it refers to is fostering 'closeness' to your partner." She excitedly continued. "Compared to pairs which share strictly professional work relationships, warm-bonded pairs are able to easily detect abnormalities in each other's wellbeing, and read micro movements for greater movement flow."

Some agents in the crowd nodded in agreement.

A video projected onto the wall showed a comparison of a cold bonded pair completing a training exercise, with a side by side comparison of a warm bonded pair. Oh. It's you two. Thought Giorgio as he recognised Alan and Wesley as the second pair.

The sceptical ones in the crowd of agents changed their tune when the latter pair's movements could be seen to be much more well-coordinated, yet achieved with much less verbal cues somehow. To top it off, they completed the exercise three minutes and fifty two seconds faster.

"There you have it." Said Dr Fine. "Synergy at its finest. At the moment, we are researching extreme cases of bonding, in which we've had agents with what you might call 'intuition' or that 'gut feeling'- claim to detect their partners in an area without any visual or audio signals."

"Oh my god. Ve get psychic powers." A German voice commented loudly.

"No, no n-not exactly, we are still researching what to call it, and how it occurs before we draw solid conclusions-" The doctor explained trying to get people not to focus on the last part exclusively.

However, the room stirred as agents began excitedly chattering almost exclusively on how soon they could unlock awesome mind powers with each other. Evan looked at Giorgio like a child would after seeing a dinosaur- sparkle in his eyes, making the older agent roll his own. They gave me a kid as a partner, wonderful.

"Now our first activity is a basic for fostering team skills, we would like you to treat it as an important duty. The care and upbringing of your shared… egg!" The doctor exclaimed holding up an egg drawn with glasses and bunned hair like herself. "Now I want you all to have fun together with this! There are craft materials on the back table, and don't forget to agree on a name together for the birth certificates."

Could this day get any more stupid? Giorgio thought in pain.

Seeing his partner frozen still with a thousand yard stare, Evan volunteered to fetch the supplies for them. "So, what hair colour should we go with?" He asked as he sat back down.

"You know what, you pick everything. I trust in your capable decisions." Said Giorgio. Missing the brief look of disappointment on his partner's face, he surveyed the room, agents discussing cosmetic traits for their eggs, as well as potential names.

A Norwegian voice to his right asked. "How about Eggbert, yes?"

"Wunderbar!" Günter shouted. "Das a strong name, good thinking Sven.

"Wow, you guys are taking this very seriously. Even though it's sort of..." Giorgio trailed off, trying to find something at least neutral to use.

"Kiddy?" Finished Sven. "Oh yeah, super kiddy. But the doctor is doing this to make us closer to being synchronized."

"Uber Agents." Günter breathed.

"And you're doing this for that 'psychic bond.'" Giorgio observed.

"I VILL EAT MY OWN BOOTS FOR PSYCHIC POWERS."

"Günter, no." Said Giorgio, a little shocked at the German agent's resolve.

"Günter, YES." Sven cheered as he fist bumped his partner.

"Hey guys! Do you have a brown marker by any chance?" Evan asked the bromantic duo.

Sven handed him one. "Here you go, oh look- you're almost done."

The three agents observed the Frenchman carefully drawing on the egg which now had the same pale blond hair as him, made from superglued knitting wool. "Ta-dah!" He said, turning the egg around triumphantly. "Our baby has the mother's eyes. And facial hair."

Giorgio choked on air, while his peers laughed heartily and introduced their own Eggbert to the 'newly born' egg.

Evan smiled at Giorgio. "Since I did all the construction, you have to come up with the name."

Giorgio side eyed the pale egg, silently offended that it now sported the same moustache and beard. "Ohh... Ok… how about… Gnocchi." He said, inspired by the shape and colour of the egg.

"Aww what a cute name for our little girl." His partner said approvingly.

"Wait, what?!"

Authors Note:

So the 6th sense thing with paired agents sensing their partners, is canon from Time Crisis 5 where (minor spoiler) Robert says that 'It sounds crazy, but I think Keith is up ahead.'

Thanks for looking forward to The Rio Mission guys! I feel like George R R Martin in terms of writing speed... "It's coming out soooooon."

There's going to be a fair bit of drama in the next chapter of VSSE Blues, but first it'll be a Rio Mission chapter release~