So my sister asked me "Why do you write your stories on paper? Isn't it a waste of time when you are putting it online anyway?" Because stupid electronics delete stuff and lose documents and rearrange words thats why! Every author who has ever lost 3/4 of a chapter say Amen!

Fairy Tail is not mine, nor am I a member of the number one guild in all of Fiore.

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Bickslow hated trains, for a completely different reason than Laxus and the other slayers. He was a high energy guy and sitting still for hours on end just wasn't his thing. He may have also had a problem with enclosed spaces. It wasn't quite claustrophobia, or so he told himself, but it came really close sometimes. Considering his background it wasn't surprising that being locked in a box with no way out made him... jittery. It was part of the reason the Thunder Legion was gone for months on their missions. They walked or flew or teleported pretty much everywhere. Metal deathtraps were avoided. Lucy forced Natsu onto a train on a regular basis, and there wasn't a living creature worse with transportation, so Bickslow knew any whining he did would be ignored.

Lucy had all but stolen his bag off his back when he arrived at the station, and had handed it off to one of her cosplay minions, who had vanished with it into an alternate dimension. He really hoped he didn't have to do anything weird to get that bag back. She apparently thought her bagnapping was normal behavior because she had just kept on moving forward. She had taken her bouncy blond self onto the train and plopped onto a bench smiling like it was no big deal that she was being forced by a demon to go to a haunted castle with a soul stealing maniac.

It disturbed him how... ok...she seemed with the situation they were in. Yeah, she talked to him at the guild, but now it was just the two of them. He knew how people looked at him when they thought he didn't know. Outside of the guildhall people avoided him like a leper. He couldn't blame them really. Who wanted to be buddy-buddy with a guy who could accidently suck out your soul? Not that he could ever do something like that on accident, but they didn't know that. So he was lounging on the bench opposite her, pretending to sleep so he could avoid the awkwardness that was sure to come.

"Hi there Pipi." He hadn't been paying attention to where his babies were once the train started moving. They knew better than to get off a moving train so they wouldn't have gotten lost. Now he wished he had been watching them because his youngest soul was hovering in front of Lucy's face. That didn't surprise him because he had been fighting Pipi's weird Cosplayer stalking for ages. Pupu's snitching was the only reason she hadn't got caught, by someone other than him, following the mage around the guild. The thing that was getting to him was that even his team didn't speak to his babies. They carried messages sometimes but it was always 'Daddy says...' and 'Tell Bickslow...' they didn't talk To the babies.

"Hello Cosplayer. " Maybe it was a good thing he wasn't carting his bag because he was going to need both hands to carry his jaw around to keep it from dragging on the ground, because Pipi was talking back. Yeah they had spoken to her before, but taunting during a fight was not the same as a conversation.

"Did Bickslow teach you to call me that?"

"Daddy named you Cosplayer. So that's who you are."

"Daddy huh?"

"Bickslow is Pipi's daddy. Pipi is daddy's baby."

"I know you are his babies. I just didn't know you called him daddy."

"Lots of babies. Pipi is daddy's baby baby. Pipi is special." Pupu shoved the happy totem and turned her big eyes toward Lucy. Bickslow just about fell off his bench when she joined the conversation.

"She's just a stupid diaper baby."

"Not stupid! Pupu stupid!" Lucy's eyes were wide and the corner of her mouth started twitching. Bickslow readied his magic to force his babies away from the blond. People always freaked out when they realized the babies weren't just echoing him.

"Pupu, is Pipi your baby sister?"

"Stupid diaper baby sister."

"Not stupid! Pipi is special!" Bickslow about died of a heart attack when Pepe the king of sarcasm dropped himself right into Lucy's lap.

"Special Ed maybe. Both of them."

"You're Pepe right?"

"That's my name don't wear it out."

"You've got quite the bite to you don't you?"

"Daddy gave me teeth for a reason."

"All three of you need to grow up, and get a grip." If Bickslow wasn't seated firmly on his bench he would have fallen to the ground. Popo too? What was going on?

"They aren't bothering me you know. I love making new friends. I'm sorry I never talked to you before." Bickslow felt his trusty fifth Totem settle onto his shoulder. At least Papa wasn't going totally bonkers.

"I like her." Nevermind. Papa had lost it too. Any second now Bickslow knew he was going to start seizing and foaming at the mouth or something.

"Friends with babies?" Pipi was spinning at an unsafe rate as she squealed in delight. "Babies don't have any friends. Only Daddy. Jokes Cosplayer? Silly jokes?" Bickslow suddenly felt sick. This was why he kept them dampened at the guild, so they didn't get get themselves hurt. No-one was friends with 'Bickslow's creepy dolls' because they were seen as just that. Cosplayer was about to shatter their tiny glowing hearts, his too, because they were his babies.

"I would never joke about that babies. Never. Do you want to be my friends?" She couldn't be serious. This was just cruel. He would do something but he had already missed his chance to save them all heartbreak. All he could do now was wait and hope she would be gentle with his babies.

"Cosplayer friend!" Pipi began diveing into her new friend's hair and giggling, soon followed by her sister. Pepe lifted himself from her lap to spin over her head with Popo. Lucy laughed and placed a hand on her keychain. A white snowman creature appeared where Pepe had been a moment before.

"Plue, I just made some new friends. Guys this is Plue my dog spirit. Plue this is Pipi, Pupu, Pepe, and Popo. Wait where..." She began looking up and down the train car only to yelp when Papa landed on her head. "Papa?" He grunted. Sort of. The high pitch the babies spoke at made it sound more like a squeak. "Plue, Papa. Papa, Plue."

"Pun. Punn pun puuunn. Pun pun?"

"Sorry, I don't have one. You know I don't carry sweets on missions."

"Pun punn. Pun pun pun puuunn pun."

"I'm not with my team today but it's still a mission. I just packed like I always do. Here," Lucy handed the shaking spirit a jewel note. "Go get yourself a treat from the dining car. Don't wander off. Come strait back." Plue hopped down and started up the aisle followed by all five giggling, shreiking babies. "Hey! Guys where are you going?"

"Help Plue!"

"Umm...ok..." Lucy pouted as they left the car. "But what about me?"

"They're babies, Cosplayer. They have really short attention spans."

"Well! The Disco Princess lives! You done with your fake nap?"

"What makes you think it was fake?"

"You're joking right?"

"...maybe..." She pointed at his feet, which he was actually a little surprised to see were bouncing. If he were anyone else he would guess he was nervous, or high as a kite, but he wasn't really and he didn't touch anything that messed with him that way.

"Eh. I tried."

"What was it you were saying about attention spans? Oh yeah. Babies. So...Baby Disco Princess, will they come back or do I need a butterfly net?"

"Why? Butterflies in your tummy now that you finally got me alone, Cosplayer?"

"No perv. To catch your babies."

"You heard them. They are helping Plue. They will come back when he does. They think he is going on an adventure."

"Some adventure. Walk two cars down. Get a lollipop. Walk back."

"Babies, Cosplayer. To them that is a really long trip without me along." He tipped his head to the side as he listened in on the babies for a moment. "Good thing they went along too. Plue just used them to translate. Poor guy seems to have forgotten normal people can't understand a word he says."

"They understand him?"

"Not really. Souls are sensitive. The babies can pick up thoughts directed at them. Like telepathy. We can't understand his words but if he thinks At us we can understand. They could understand him when he said 'Hi. Nice to meet you' but the rest of it was directed at you so they couldn't hear. Make sense?"

"Yeah. When you said 'we' earlier did that mean you can too? Hear thoughts directed at you I mean."

"Not yours, not as long as you are stuck in that sexy bimbo body of yours, unless I was using my figure eyes. I can always hear the babies in the back of my head because we are connected. I don't always listen though. Your spirit isn't human, but it isn't a soul either, so I'm not sure. Probably. If the babies can I probably can."

"That's so cool! My spirits are like that. They can send me thoughts through my keys and I can send them back."

Their, way deeper than intended, discussion was ended as Plue swooped back into the car surfing on Bickslow's babies. The story of the Epic Lollipop Quest was long and very loud, and kept Bickslow from having to deal with any more questions. As he watched his babies play with Lucy and her spirit he felt a tiny ray of hope light his heart. Maybe, just maybe, she had ment it when she told Pipi she would be her friend.

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To be continued