A/N: Hi, friends. Look, yes. I know this chapter's out really late and I know it's short, but believe me. I've tried so hard on this. I'm writing while tired, so please don't be mad at me.

Eww...I knew they would've been waiting. Celestino was pissed at me for skipping town on him for a while. And this would be my punishment. One catty stylist, one catty makeup artist, and one already in a bitchy mood Violet that doesn't have the intestinal fortitude to deal with them today. I hope you're getting your kicks, Celestino, you sadistic son of a bitch. I didn't mean that. Mama Cialdini is a sweetheart. But that didn't make these two any more pleasant.

My long black curls tickled the top of my back while I got into a saucy leather number meant for both Bad Romance and S&M. Although, I was debating on whether or not to keep S&M on the setlist. If Mike would've been cool with me going on a world tour, it'd be a different story. But if they had continued the way they were without Chris busting things up, my heart wouldn't have been in it. There would be nothing but a shell on that ice. Oh well. My greatest strength did always lie in my improvisational skills. I'd have to make that decision quick.

I already knew I was in the finals. If I place today, I'm in the clear. Given that I've already won London and Moscow is practically home turf, I'm sure I can do this. My head's a little foggy, but that might have been from the vodka I had on the train from St. Petersburg. I needed something to soothe my nerves. What better to do that for me than a long train ride and a little Russian vodka? Just what a girl needs to get her head on straight.

When I heard the loud speaker boom out my name, my time had come. With a kiss on my cheek and well wishes from Celestino, along with cheers and squeals from my boys, I skated out to the middle of the rink, cheating out to the crowd. Relax, Violet. You'll do fine. Shake the feelings you vented out in St. Petersburg off. That's not what this routine's about. That doesn't fit your theme. Alright. You ready? Let's do this.

Once the opening guitar riff blared out, I had it. I knew what this was. A story of unrequited love. Of a woman who has a heart too big for herself. She gets so greedy that her big heart and all of his best parts aren't enough. The good parts of him are nice, but everyone gets to see them. She wants the dark. The ugly. The gritty. The parts he would think no one would want. She wants to be that lifeline for him. And she is.

What she doesn't realize is that lifeline is giving her delicate, caring hands the most wicked and rough case of rope burn. Yet, she doesn't want to let go. She can't. The rope had wrapped around her hands. It snaked up her arm and draped around her neck, ready to choke her at any given moment. Before she knew it, that lifeline had her completely tangled in a web she could never get herself free from. Except maybe with a quadruple toe loop, just to drive the point home.

I stood tall once the song ended. Every muscle in my body told me to fall dramatically to the ice, but I had to stay on my feet. As the rain of flowers and gifts fell over me, I kept the giant smile they all loved to see plastered on my face. Granted, I did just kick major ass at my routine, but on the inside, there was no celebration. There was an aching pair of feet and a throbbing hip and thighs on fire struggling to keep me up. And to top it all off, a heart too big for one person shattered to pieces.

"That was fantastic, Violet!" Celestino threw his arms around me, pulling me into the hug I so desperately needed right now, "I'm so proud of you."

"Thanks, Coach." Don't start crying, Violet. Don't let them see you sweat. Bottle it up. Let them see the smile they're here for. Break down in the hotel room, not when the cameras are rolling.

"It appears you have more fans here than you thought," he took some of the flowers off my hands, "Should I be worried?"

"No," I promised, "I know the rules. No dating fans."

"Very good," Celestino praised, "Now, do you have any plans for tonight?"

Go into my hotel room and bawl my eyes out, "Not that I can think of. I kind of wanted to just have a quiet night inside."

"Come on, Violet," he groaned, "I know you've been a good girl since we left the US and for the sake of my health, I thank you for that. But let me take you out tonight."

"Thanks, but no, thanks," I brushed him off, "Really, Celestino. I'm exhausted. I don't think I could physically go out tonight. I just want to go back to the hotel and get some sleep."

"Don't make me play dirty, Violet..."

"Shut your damn mouth, Celestino," I knew what his playing dirty would entail. Clearly, someone didn't understand my routine, "I'm tired and I want to go to bed."

Immediately, Celestino backed off, "Alright. I'll celebrate for two then?"

"Just have Chris and Victor leave the boys with me," I let out a heavy, exasperated sigh, "Let them have a night off."

"That's awfully kind of you, Violet," he awed.

"But I also know better," I pointed out, "Yurio's going to crash as soon as his head hits a pillow and Yuri might stay up a few minutes after that only to do the same thing. I raised those boys for a good majority of their lives, Celestino. If I don't know how they work, there's something wrong with me. People seem to forget that."

I was way too tired to process anything. I just wanted to go back to the hotel. Was that too much to ask? Once I had my gold medal in my hand, I walked out, pushing my way through the crowds and the reporters. Even Chris and Victor tried reaching out for me. But I couldn't deal with anyone right now. And that included my boys. All of them. And I had no energy to even celebrate. Don't get me wrong. I'm stoked I won gold. But now, I just wanted to sleep.

The sun had already started setting over Moscow and I got some damn nice views from my room. After a glass of hospitality that felt warm all the way to my tummy, I threw myself on the bed. Rome, Violet. In the next day or so, you'll be back in Rome. You haven't been there in quite some time. Not since the incident in Tokyo that led you to…

MAMA! I haven't seen Mama Cialdini in years! I miss her. I should find that one app on my phone that helped me learn Italian. Once in a while, I'll use it with Celestino, but Mama's English wasn't exactly the best. And she and I have had some rather deep conversations over her kitchen table. I loved Mama Cialdini more than my own mother. But in order to get back to Rome, I had to get some sleep. Just a little. That's all I needed. Then, I can get back up and do this all again.

A little while later, I felt something else moving in my bed. And another something else. One on my left, one on my right. I see someone got my message. Not that I minded. I'm sure these two were only going to sleep. I mean, there was another bed in my room, but this was ok. I could get on board with this, too. I woke up just long enough to tuck them in, giving them each a kiss goodnight.

A/N: I know exactly what Violet's feeling. First of all, panic attacks take soooooooooooo much out of a person. And once you've fully come down, all you want to do is sleep. Kind of like me right now. If it wasn't obvious, I'm wrecked. I've been on my feet all day and I think I'm going to go sleepy bye now. Next week, we're going to see the babies skate. We'll see what they can do and if they make their mama proud (of course they do…). See you next chapter! xx