Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to The Vampire Diaries, TV show or books. However I decided to have a little play around with the characters (I would definitely like to play with Damon).
Unfortunately the sire-bond is part of the story and can't be ignored. Therefore this chapter has been written with deliberate ambiguity in mind in regards to Elena's choices as to whether they are her own decision or if it is the sire-bond at play. There is no rule as to how to interpret her actions. It is solely down to the reader to decide. From the perspective of the writer, as far as I'm concerned, in the show I cant say for certain whether Elena would have done what she did without it, therefore I have included one reference which suggests the sire-bond might have had some influence on her decision, albeit very small.
Warning for explicit sexual content, bad language and blood play.
Dear Diary
I transitioned and I now I am a vampire!
I was also a little pissed with Damon too.
Damon compelled me TWICE!
I know I wrote the first time in my last diary entry, but more information came to light during my transition and back then I didn't know he'd compelled me again. Even worse, I knew him when he did it and he was fully aware I was not entirely happy with people being compelled unless it was for their own good.
The first time was when we first met. Which was a diary entry all of its own.
The second time he compelled me was just after him and Stefan rescued me from Rose. I always suspected Damon was the one who returned my necklace, because only he and Stefan could come into the house at the time and Stefan wouldn't have any reason to compel me to forget. That night Damon told me he loved me but he didn't deserve me. It explains why he backed off after that. I often wondered why. But it appears he decided to let me and Stefan be together.
So now I'm a vampire. Stefan tried me on animal blood but I threw it up, I can't drink blood bags, I can only drink warm blood from the vein, and it has to be a human vein. We found out because I initially drank Damon's blood because I didn't want to drink human blood. I threw that back up. Damon then tried me on a blood bag, that tasted like garbage. I couldn't even swallow that. Eventually Matt offered to let me feed from him, and oh my god, it was the most heavenly feeling ever. But I digress.
Until we found out what I could drink, Damon was trying to help me find alternatives to human blood. I told him no human or animal blood, which left him a little short on options. I went to Damon because Stefan was so pumped about me drinking animal blood, he seemed to ignore the fact I'd puked it all back up, even after I told him I'd been sick. It's like he buried his head in the sand because it didn't fit with his agenda of getting me on the bunny diet. I knew he wouldn't help, so I turned to Damon instead, because I knew he'd understand better.
Due to my insistence on no animal or human blood, it left Damon with only one choice, me feed from him. I thought that would be fine as that was how Mikael survived, but it turns out vampire's drinking from each other is 'personal' was how Damon put it. He warned me, but I was hungry. Initially I didn't understand, but I soon got the message when I realized what reaction I was having and it was hard to ignore Damon's reaction. Hard being the operative word, because that is exactly what happened, Damon was clearly as turned on by it as I was. It was strange as I think he could sense what I was feeling. He never explained it to me in full, but actions speak louder than words.
The blood wasn't very nice compared to human blood straight from the vein. However I did feel something of Damon's presence inside of me, which was a really wonderful feeling. I just wish it had been more than just his presence I felt. I did experience a mini orgasm, and I think Damon did too. We agreed not to discuss the entirety of what transpired in the bathroom with anyone else. Yes Damon told Stefan we blood shared, but I think he left out the orgasm part. I'm not even sure Damon would want to go into that much detail with Stefan.
When Stefan found out about me feeding from Damon, he was furious. I managed to turn the subject around but I doubt he'll forgive Damon in a hurry. I know I should have stopped as soon as I understood what Damon meant, but this is Damon. My self control around him is weakening, especially since I became a vampire. I'm not in full control of my emotions, and my feelings for Damon seem to be heightened. Strangely that's not happened with Stefan. But we haven't been back together long, and we need time to readjust. I' think it's because I've been used to being around Damon more than Stefan over the last few months. Once we've spent more time together I'm sure everything will be back to how it used to be between Stefan and me, or I hope it will, I think.
One thing Stefan and I haven't done yet is make love. Admittedly, we never had the most active sex life, although Stefan was very caring in that way. But since I turned I just feel constantly turned on. Especially when I'm around Damon. I'm just not having the feelings for Stefan in that way as much. Maybe if at first I imagine having sex with Damon when I'm with Stefan, it might make it more appealing.
This brings me to my dream. I thought after the last one, which was after I transitioned, and was back with Stefan I'd gotten him out of my system and I'd never dream about him again. Clearly I was wrong. I guess my increased sexual appetite could be partly responsible for the dream. Plus my growing physical attraction to Damon (I never imagined that could get stronger but it did) might be an additional factor. But other than kissing Stefan in the woods after feeding and then vomiting the blood back up, which killed the mood. The closest I've had to sex since before Klaus tried to kill me was when I fed from Damon today and at the motel in Denver, again with Damon. Every time I come close to sex it seems to be with Damon and not Stefan.
No surprise about what influenced the dream. I stopped feeding from Damon just before either of us would have taken it too far, because we were both on the verge of losing control. In that way, it reminds me of what happened in Denver. That is a memory which will stay with me forever, and this one will be placed in the same box. Now I wish more than ever we'd had the chance to take things further in Denver, even if it was for that one time only. Because technically I cheated on Stefan with Damon, and although I don't particularly feel guilty about it, I can't do anything again with Damon. I doubt Stefan will give me or Damon another free pass, and I do at least want to try and make a go of things with Stefan. So to try and resolve things between Stefan and I, I'm going to have to initiate sex with Stefan.
If it all goes well and Stefan and I make love, this might be my last diary entry.
E
...the previous night's dream.
Elena got out of her car and approached the grill, where she knew Damon would be. Even though he was pissed with her, she didn't have anyone else who she could turn to right now. Stefan wanted her to go on the bunny diet, which she'd obliged to keep him happy. However the blood had just made her throw up. She'd tried to tell him, but he brushed it off, telling her she needed time to adjust. Elena, however knew it wasn't simply because she didn't like it. She'd managed to swallow it, despite it tasting horrible. The problem had happened after, when her body had tried absorb the blood. Something wasn't compatible and she'd been violently sick.
Elena had tried calling Caroline, but her best friend was tied up in her own drama's with Tyler and she was almost impossible to reach. That left her with the person she truly wanted to ask to help her, yet at the same time she didn't, Damon. Part of her wanted to go to him as she knew he was the one person in the world she could trust above everyone else to be truthful and help her. The only problem was right now, Damon was extremely pissed off with Elena, after she left him to die alone when she chose Stefan. So what Elena had needed was an excuse. One to confront Damon in a way which wouldn't arouse Stefan's suspicions, while simultaneously giving her an excuse to talk to Damon. Luckily for Elena, she'd just been handed one in the shape of an explosion which had killed off the town council.
When Elena opened the door, she scoured the bar and found Damon sat on his usual chair in the grill. She took a deep breath and approached him. Her idea was to confront him and then slip it in that she needed his assistance and hope he wasn't offended enough by her accusations to still care enough for her to help. Elena knew he hadn't set off the explosion, but nobody would think it out of the ordinary for Elena to confront Damon about it. She just hoped Damon would realize it was a ruse and it wouldn't piss him off any more than he already was with her.
Elena took hold of the seat next to Damon's. "Did you do it?" she asked as she began to sit down.
"That seat's taken." Damon snapped at her without even looking.
"But there's no one here." Elena frowned.
Damon turned to face Elena. "Well, I'm just going to pretend like there's someone there, because the alternative is just too damn depressing." he snarled, as it dawned upon Elena that it was Ric's usual seat and Damon wasn't going to allow anyone to sit there.
Elena realized Damon was already in a foul mood. He was drinking early and even snippier than usual. He was grumpy the last time she'd spoken to him before she'd left the boarding house to feed with Stefan, but his mood had clearly gotten even worse since then. Deciding she was already going to be pushing Damon's temper enough with her false accusation, she moved to his other side and sat down.
"Did you set off the explosion that killed the Town Council?" Elena asked in an accusatory tone, her voice low enough for only Damon to hear.
"Am I wearing my "I Blew Up The Council" t-shirt?" Damon asked sarcastically. "Why does everybody keep asking me that?" he scowled.
"Did you?" Elena pressed, pretending it was the real reason she was there.
"No!" Damon snapped. "Anything else?" he asked, rolling his eyes in a way which made it obvious he was clearly aware Elena had other motives for seeing him.
Elena hesitated for a moment, she just hoped she hadn't pissed him off too much. "Yes, something's wrong. I can't keep any of the animal blood down." she whispered.
"Well, there's a shock." Damon looked at her smugly.
"I think I need your help" Elena pleaded.
Damon sighed. "Of course you do. Pick your meal." Damon smiled sarcastically as he pointed to a woman near the pool table. "You've got Asian fusion." he suggested pointing to the window. "Mexican. What about some good old American comfort food?" he waived his hand in the general direction of the bar.
"No. No, no human blood. Stefan's right, I have to at least try to get through this without hurting anyone." Elena stammered.
Damon quickly downed his drink and stood up. "Fine, come on." Damon growled, grabbing hold of Elena's arm. He pulled her across the bar and into the restroom, locking the door after them.
"What are you doing?" Elena frowned Damon bit his hand.
"Giving you what you need." Damon told her. "Drink." he commanded as he held his hand to her, which was covered in blood.
"What?" Elena looked at him in shock, the smell of blood hitting her like a freight train.
"You're a new vampire, Elena. You need warm blood from the vein." Damon explained. "Maybe this will do the trick. Or not. But just, don't tell Stefan." he narrowed his eyes.
Elena stared at the blood on his hand. "Why not?" she asked her eyes not straying from the delicious smelling blood in Damon's hand.
"Because blood sharing is kind of personal." Damon told her slightly hesitantly.
"What do you mean it's personal?" Elena frowned, finally looking up at Damon before taking took another look at his hand. She was starving and Damon was offering himself up, although she suspected he was going to enjoy it as much as she was considering his warning about it being personal and not to tell Stefan. A small alarm bell sounded off inside her head telling her what she was doing could be classed as cheating on Stefan, but right now she was past caring. Her head was skeptical, but every other part of her body said yes. Like Damon said, Elena needed warm blood from the vein and he was a source without hurting a human.
"Just drink." Damon insisted.
The smell of Damon's blood became too much. The scent made her gums watered and her teeth elongated automatically. The veins around her eyes tingled with the overwhelming desire for blood.
Blood wasn't the only thing on Elena's mind, there was currently another need deep down inside her. One which needed to be satisfied almost as much the lust for blood. It was her yearning to be close and connected with Damon. She'd missed him so much since she turned. But Elena knew she only had herself to blame. She just wished she knew how to make it right and how to get him back, because without Damon in it, her life was empty which was making her unhappy. Elena needed Damon, she needed him back in her life and if him wanting her to try this as an alternative option to the bunny diet would achieve that, she was prepared to give it a go. The idea might be a little unconventional, but if it worked, there was a chance she and Damon could grow closer again. And maybe one day he would forgive her for what happened the night she rejected him. By doing this, it could be a way of bonding them once more. And frankly, if she had to lie to Stefan to keep Damon in her life, she would, because she wasn't prepared to lose him.
Damon nodded in approval as Elena raised his bloody hand to her mouth and she began to drink. His blood was better than the animal stuff but she knew it wasn't exactly right for what she needed for nutritional purposes. However, once his hand reached her lips the only nourishment on her mind, was of a different kind. One which only Damon would be able to satisfy, because he was the cause. Elena didn't just want to be around Damon emotionally, she needed his presence on a physical level too. But this was the first time they'd been alone together since she turned and the effect he had on her was unprecedented. Right now, he could be pissed off with her and he would still affect her ten times more powerfully than he did that night in Denver, when she'd lost control with him, even as a human without heightened emotions. As a vampire, Elena's self control stood little chance of resistance.
The tingling in her eyes and gums had spread down her body, specifically to her core. The blood did little for her in way of satisfying her hunger, however it did increase her desire for a more intimate connection to Damon. His scent was intoxicating, far more powerful than she found it before she turned, possibly due to her heightened sense of smell, or maybe it was an increased attraction to him, she couldn't be sure.
What Elena was aware of, was how turned on she was becoming. She felt her panties becoming damp with desire, and she knew she needed some kind of friction to help relieve the ache between her thighs, however she wasn't sure how the blood sharing was affecting Damon. Deciding to find out, Elena pushed Damon up against the wall and rubbed her body against his. Her first clue he was experiencing something similar was when she felt him running his fingers tenderly through her hair. Elena's hip tactically found its target to find out whether he was as turned on by the experience as she was. She was pleased when she felt a huge bulge in his jeans, giving her the confidence to pull off her next move.
Elena's turned her body slightly and she straddled Damon's thigh. She began to rub herself up and down his leg, making sure her body was in contact with his huge erection, just to make sure he was enjoying this as much as she was. Elena heard Damon's breathing change, he was clearly turned on by what they were doing, which only served to fuel Elena's desire. She glanced up to look at Damon's face, but was distracted by the sight of his carotid artery in his neck. Slower than a human's, but she could sense his heartbeat pumping the blood throughout his body.
Without warning, Elena's natural vampire instincts, combined with sexual need too over. She released his hand and her mouth latched onto his neck. Her fangs piercing his skin and artery to allow the blood to flow more freely into her mouth. She stopped rubbing herself against Damon's leg, instead she moved herself to enable her to press her pelvis against his, circling her hips, allowing her to feel his erection through his jeans.
Elena's newfound heightened sexual appetite, which had yet to be fulfilled, combined with her blood-lust was causing her to lose control. She was fully aware this was common among vampires, it was the reason Stefan was a ripper. However Elena was unsure whether her own reaction was indeed the blood, or the blood donor himself who was having the biggest impact on what she was doing. Whichever it was, Elena was powerless to stop, she just needed more. More blood, more Damon.
Needing to feel closer to Damon, Elena pushed his jacket off his shoulders. At least that way he wouldn't get blood on it. Possibly thinking along the same lines, Damon wriggled himself free of the offending item. Next Elena's hands seemed to have a mind of their own as they wandered under Damon's black t-shirt and began to roam his muscular chest. She explored the hard muscles of his abs, in contrast to the softness of his skin with the small tufts of hair around his nipples. Her mind took her back to the time of the bachelor auction where he'd flaunted himself semi naked in front of her, up close and personal. Although at the time Elena paid no attention to Damon's attractiveness, she couldn't ignore his fabulous frame. The memory of which, now served only to ignite more fire in her own body, causing heat to pool in the pit of her stomach.
One overriding memory she had was that of the dark hairs of his treasure trail, which she suspected would lead her to the source of insurmountable pleasure. As her fingers began to travel along the path of his hips, exposed by his low slung jeans, Elena felt Damon's hand slide up the back of her top and caress her naked back. The other hand tucked her hair behind her shoulder, before ghosting his fingers across her skin, his every touch seemingly setting her on fire.
Suddenly Elena felt the telltale sensation of fangs gently pricking her neck, followed by Damon's tongue licking the small droplets of blood which he had drawn. He repeated the action as the wound closed up. Never fully piercing enough to suck the blood from her. Just enough for him to be able to taste her. Elena nearly collapsed at the wonderful sensation.
Elena hooked her leg over Damon's thigh while her fingers tugged at the loops of his jeans, pulling him in ever tighter. Damon moved his pelvis to thrust his erection against Elena's core, causing her to whimper with desire. Suddenly he spun them around so Elena's back was against the wall. The surprise from the movement broke Elena's concentration and she pulled away from his neck. Simultaneously, Damon did the same as they looked at each other in the eyes. Their faces were both in full vampire form. However, this time, instead of finding his features disconcerting and even a little scary, Elena found him more beautiful than ever.
Damon rested his forehead against Elena's, as if trying to reign in some semblance of control, but Elena stopped him. Her lips gently brushed up against his while Damon raised her leg and hooked it around his waist. There was no question what they both had in mind, it was as if their bodies knew each other's desires, fueling their own needs.
Their mouths came together once more, this time with more passion and urgency. Elena parted her lips to allow Damon to explore and taste her, while he responded in the same manner. Elena could taste her own blood on him, which turned out to be as intoxicating as his own, even though she knew it wasn't exactly what she needed to survive. Instead right now, it felt as if her survival was dependent on her sexual release. Or more specifically, the survival of those around them, was depending on it. If there were so much as a knock on the bathroom door, Elena wasn't sure whether she would be responsible for her actions. Anyone daring to interrupt them would be risking life and limb. During this moment, it dawned upon Elena how much self restraint Damon had exercised the night at the motel when Jeremy had disturbed them. How he didn't kill her brother completely baffled her.
Elena tugged at the hem of Damon's t-shirt, broke away from the kiss and pulled it over his head. Her mouth returned to his while her hands explored his chest, her fingernails scraping along the hairs of his treasure trail. Damon pulled away and slid his hands under her top, pushing it over her head all the while ghosting his fingers up the side of Elena's body, leaving goose flesh in their wake before they returned to their kiss.
Damon rolled his hips up against Elena's, creating friction through the denim boundaries they were wearing. Their upper bodies pressed together as tightly as possible, desperate for their naked flesh to be connected in some way or another. For Elena, this wasn't enough. She wanted him inside her right away. As their tongues danced and fought for dominance, Elena began to unbuckle the belt keeping Damon's low slung jeans hanging around his hips.
All the while Elena was fumbling with Damon's belt, he was unfastening her own jeans. His experience and extra vampire speed paid off as the was faster than Elena when it came to undressing the opposite sex. Damon's hand slid into Elena's panties. The moment his warm skin brushed against her folds for the first time, Elena almost melted with pleasure.
"God, you are so fucking wet Elena." Damon growled seductively in her ear. "I wonder why." he smirked.
"Because I want you to fuck me!" Elena whispered back as Damon's fingers gently massaged her clit and folds.
Elena was so carried away in the moment, she wasn't even shocked by her own boldness or her unusually explicit language. If anything, feeling free to use it, turned her on even more. Finally her hands managed to reach their goal of the inside of Damon's jeans. She released him from the confines of his cotton prison. Her fingers wiped the pre-cum around the tip, before wrapping her hand around his girth and starting to slowly pump his shaft.
"Are you sure?" Damon asked in a barely audible voice, a testament to the effect of her actions were having on him.
"I want you inside of me now!" Elena demanded.
"Patience." Damon said softly. "I think we both might still be a little...peckish." he smirked as Elena frowned with confusion.
Deciding she wasn't feeling particularly patient at that moment, Elena pushed her jeans down and kicked them off. For a moment, Damon watched on in astonishment, before removing his own jeans at vamp-speed. Damon pushed Elena flat up against the wall as she once again hooked one of her legs around his waist. He swiftly lifted the other leg and wrapped it around his waist as he coated his member with her juices for lubrication before placing it at her entrance. Once ready he thrust himself inside her.
Elena almost screamed with pleasure at the suddenness of the intrusion. Damon had no issues entering her as she was already soaking wet from his simple touch. Her eyes rolled back into her head at the sensation of feeling full. His length penetrating deep inside her, deeper than anyone had ever been before. Elena felt Damon's lips on her shoulder as he pulled out and thrust back in her with such force, it would have killed a human. For the first time, Elena was glad she was a vampire as Damon wouldn't have to be careful not to hurt her. They didn't have to worry about pain, or hurting one another physically. If anything, a little bit of pain only served to heighten the experience and intensify the pleasure.
Damon continued to thrust violently, Elena matching his movements with her hips the best she could. They continued to kiss on the lips, neck and shoulders. Elena scraped her fingernails down Damon's neck, causing it to bleed momentarily. The smell of blood instantly hit Elena's nostrils. She felt her eyes tingle and her fangs elongate. Damon took one look at her and smiled.
"You still hungry?" he whispered.
"Uh uh." Elena nodded.
"Good, me too." Damon growled as he kissed her on the lips and began to carry her, while Elena's legs still wrapped around him, and he was still inside her. Damon made his way into the nearest cubicle and closed the door.
"What are we doing?" she asked.
"I've got an idea." Damon grinned. "But I need you to stand." he told her, as he pulled out of her. Elena frowned, but did as Damon suggested and stood while Damon placed the toilet lid down and sat on it. Damon pulled her towards him. "Here." he held his wrist up to her. "I want you to drink from my wrist."
Elena looked at him with confusion, however she didn't argue, instead she took hold of his wrist. Her fangs elongated and her eyes began to tingle as she bit down and slowly sucked the warm fluid into her mouth.
Meanwhile Damon was kissing her stomach and the tops of her thighs. He lowered his head and licked a line up Elena's slit from her core to her clit, causing Elena to moan with pleasure. With his free hand, Damon separated Elena's folds and blew into them with his warm breath. His tongue followed as he began to thrust his it inside her core, mimicking his earlier actions except this time he wasn't using his shaft. As he his tongue thrust in and out of her entrance, his spare thumb massaged her nub to intensify the sensation. Elena thought she was going to pass out with pleasure as she felt shudders running throughout her body, a sign she was about to come.
However before she got a chance to reach her climax, Damon's mouth moved and attached itself to her clit while he inserted two fingers inside her. The small interval had left her body wound up, but her impending release had dissipated slightly. Damon would have to bring her back to the edge once more, although considering how much she was throbbing and burning inside, Elena suspected it wouldn't take very long.
His long talented fingers thrust in and out of her while his mouth worked it's magic. Elena laced her fingers through the hand belonging to the wrist she was feeding from, while the other hand gripped hold of Damon's hair. She noticed his erection was still standing proud and tall, which didn't surprise her. Elena wasn't entirely sure how blood sharing worked, but she suspected Damon was experiencing some part of Elena's feelings while she drank his blood.
Elena's body began to sing with lust, the tingling in her eyes, gums and core had now spread throughout her entire body. She was desperate for her release, but Damon kept selling her short by building her up and stopping every time she was on the verge of her climax. He repeated this too many times to count, but her core was becoming painful with the need for release. Luckily vampires had an infinite amount of energy when it came to sex, meaning Elena never got tired, just frustrated. To make her sentiment known, she pulled on Damon's hair to tell him she'd had enough of his teasing. The message must have gotten through as he began to pump faster and his mouth worked even harder on her nub. But just as she felt the waves of her climax build up ready to crash over her, he stopped what he was doing with his mouth and at vamp speed he replaced it with his thumb.
Damon's lips found their way to the top of Elena's thigh, and she felt a pinprick of delicious pain as Damon's fangs pierced her skin and into her femoral artery. The feeling was unbelievable. Her core began to contract and clamped down on Damon's fingers so hard she was surprised she didn't break them. She momentarily let go of Damon's wrist and raised her head to the air, a silent scream of pleasure emerging from her lips.
The burning sensation which had been building up inside Elena's stomach turned into a fire which raged, not only through her core like any normal orgasm, but through every vein in her body. Her orgasm was still primarily concentrated on her core as white hot spasms continued to ravage her under his every touch. Yet at the same time, the rest of her body was writhing bucking from the mini orgasms created by Damon drinking her blood.
All the while another feeling crashed over her. This one was different. It was a feeling of warmth, home and love. This in itself intensified her physical experience, although she wasn't entirely sure whether the feelings of love were coming from her or the were from Damon.
"Fuck...Damon...Yes, yes, yes...argh!" she cried as her body suddenly went rigid and she arched her back.
Elena took Damon's wrist into her mouth and began to suck the blood from his vein. If the feelings were hers, she wanted him to know about it. Damon moaned as he drew more blood, removing his fingers and wrapping his arm around Elena's waist, pulling her in tight to him. The loss of contact caused Elena's orgasm to slowly begin to subside as Damon removed his fangs from her artery, while his tongue lapping at the wound until it closed up, ensuring not a drop of blood was wasted.
Eventually Damon stood up, their mouths met once more, tasting one another's blood as they kissed. Damon backed Elena up against the wall of the cubicle and lifted her legs over his arms, parting them wide, while his member found her entrance. He thrust deep and powerfully inside her, almost taking her breath away. Elena wrapped one arm around Damon's neck, while the other pressed against the door of the cubicle. She tried to move her hips in unison with his, but the position restricted her to tiny movements. Although awkward, the position was wonderful as every time Damon pounded inside her, his pelvis brushed up against her nub, stimulating her further with every thrust. Elena never knew sex could be so desperate, needy and powerful all in one.
After a few minutes, Damon lowered Elena to the floor and turned her around to face the cubicle wall. She placed her palms flat against the tiles as Damon pulled her hips lower. He spread her legs and pushed himself inside her. Elena had never experienced being taken from behind before and she was surprised by how different it felt, in a good way. Suddenly Damon's wrist appeared in front of her.
"Drink." he whispered into her ear.
Elena didn't need to be told twice. Her eyes tingled and her fangs lengthened as she bit into his wrist. As she did this, she felt Damon's fangs find her neck as he gently began to suck. Elena could tell from the tugging sensation, Damon was hardly taking any blood from her, just enough to share the experience. This time Elena had an idea what to expect. The sensation of warmth, security, safety and love washed over her. Elena realized Damon's physical lust for her was only secondary to his emotional desire for her. Elena knew these were Damon's feelings for her, however the one which she knew was definitely hers was the sense of feeling free while at the same time finally coming home and being where she knew she should be, in the arms of the man, with whom she suspected she ultimately belonged.
This time, the blood sharing seemed to be more of an emotional experience as opposed to the physical one she'd earlier encountered. As he thrust in and out of her, she could sense Damon's pleasure, but more importantly, she felt his emotional attachment growing every minute, which was fine by her as the feelings were mutual. However it wasn't to say her physical experience was in anyway diminished as it in fact was becoming ever more heightened. To prove the point, Damon's free hand reached down underneath her and found her clit, which he subsequently began to massage. As he did, Elena felt her self control slipping away from her. All she wanted was Damon inside her, hard and fast in every way possible. She momentarily withdrew from taking his blood.
"Harder Damon." she moaned. "Fuck me harder." she begged before biting back into Damon's wrist.
Damon complied with Elena's wishes, thrusting harder and faster inside her. Her hips met his in perfect synchronized movements. The room was almost silent apart from the sound of skin on skin until Elena began to moan with pleasure against Damon's wrist. All of her emotions and pleasure were not only heightened, but she was feeling out of control because she could feel what Damon was feeling too. It was as if she could see inside his soul, and much to her surprise, she found he wasn't as different from her as she had previously thought, which possibly explained why he believed she would have liked the human version of him. What Damon hadn't known was Elena had been in love with the vampire Damon for some time. She'd just been too scared to admit it to herself, let alone anyone else. However, with Elena's lack of self control, she suspected Damon was now fully aware of how she felt about him, or at least suspected something. Not that she'd tell him, unless he confronted her. However, if he started to be much nicer to her, in meant he probably knew and was biding his time, because as Elena was learning, she and Stefan may now be on borrowed time. Elena was brought out of her reverie when she heard Damon begin to moan, as simultaneously Elena felt his pleasure heighten further.
By now, Elena knew neither of them were in full control of their actions. It reminded her of the time in Denver when the pull of Damon was too much for her to resist. Elena lost control that night even as a human. At this moment, she could feel Damon's need for her overriding his notorious super self control. In a way, this connection made Elena feel free and liberated. They were in this experience together, therefore neither could judge each other. It was what they both wanted, and above all, what they both had needed and desired for a very long time.
Damon withdrew his wrist, fangs, and length from Elena once more, before sitting back down on the toilet. He pulled her over until she straddled above him. Damon then took hold of her hips and lowered her down onto his shaft. As he did, Elena cupped Damon's face and stroked his cheek before her lips met his. Damon began to work her hips while he thrust up inside her the best he could, although she suspected he was being a little gentle with her.
Elena's fangs tugged at Damon's bottom lip, causing it to bleed as her mouth made its way to Damon's neck, while he did the same. As they simultaneously pierced each others skin, they both seemed to decide to only take a minimal amount of blood. Enough to just heighten the experience they were sharing. Although they couldn't read each other's minds, their actions spoke volumes. Latching on tightly while having sex in this position would be impossible even with the ever growing change of pace as they slowed down their movements. Instead Elena circled her hips to create the friction as opposed to the hard thrusting of earlier.
Elena suspected they were no longer just having sex, instead they were making love. There was no disputing what had been taking place earlier. That was purely uninhibited, rampant, lascivious, fucking. Now every move was tender and gentle, yet no less erotic. The blood sharing emotions were becoming even stronger as they both tried to read one anothers feelings. Love and their bodies uniting in a way which acknowledged what they truly meant to each other was the primary emotion. That union seemed to symbolize two soulmates finally finding their partner, fraught with a desperate desire to revel in the freedom it gave them to be themselves without the pretenses they showed to the outside world. Only they knew and fully understood one another, like only soulmates can.
All the while these thoughts were going on in Elena's head, her body was beginning to feel the familiar sensation of the build up to her climax. She sensed Damon was also close to his release, which was initially a very disconcerting experience, yet once she understood what the sensation was, she found it comforting to know they were both in the final throes of making love and on course to climax almost simultaneously.
Damon moved his hand and began to massage Elena's clit with his thumb. They both stopped the blood sharing and began to kiss deeply. They both parted their lips, the taste of their own blood still present each others mouths. As their tongues swiped and danced, the blood mixed together, combining the taste of them both into one, and to Elena, it was delicious. This sent more heat pooling into Elena's stomach, which was being exacerbated by Damon's ministrations with his thumb. Her core was hot and throbbing to the point of becoming painful. Damon's thrusts started to become more purposeful, as Elena sensed he was on the verge of his own climax, yet she knew he'd do his best to hold out until she'd found hers. His next words proved her right.
"I want you to come for me Elena." he begged, his voice hoarse from exertion.
To speed up the process, Damon's free hand tugged one of Elena's breasts from her black lacy bra, before returning to her hip to help her with her movements. He licked the areola with his tongue before sucking on the nipple, his tongue flicking and his teeth nipping at it, causing it to pebble. Elena had never realized her breasts could be so sensitive, however it appeared in the right hands, or mouth, they were.
This was all it needed to send Elena over the edge. Her head tipped back as the white hot magma in her stomach began to overflow into her core, gradually edging its way down, violent, hot contractions following in it's wake.
"Oh yes...that is good." Elena panted as her entire body began to convulse with pleasure. "Oh my god...Damon...oh fuck...yes...yes...Damon...uh...argh" she cried as her body went rigid and her back arched, pressing her breast further into Damon's mouth, as he sucked even harder.
Elena felt the spasms ravaging her core clamp down on Damon's shaft, milking him to find his own release. She heard a growl emitting from his lips, prompting Elena to look down on his face, even though her own orgasm was still wreaking havoc throughout her body.
"Fuck...Elena...ahhh!" he whimpered. His face scrunched up in pleasure, reaching his own climax as she felt his seed enter her womb. Elena gradually slowed down the circling of her hips as both their orgasms began to subside, before she collapsed in post coital bliss in Damon's arms.
Elena rested her head in the crook of Damon's neck with his on hers while they both tried to regain their breaths and take stock of what had just happened. Damon had warned her blood sharing was personal and to not tell Stefan, but he hadn't exactly been specific as to how intimate the act actually was. Elena knew Damon, and was certain, no matter how pissed off he was with her, he would never initiate something like that if he thought she would have sex with him, unless she wanted to. To which Elena hadn't given any indication to him she felt that way since she rejected him.
"What just happened?" Elena lifted her head and looked at Damon questioningly.
"Umm...Elena, your dad was a doctor. Did your parents not explain the bit about the birds and the bees?" he asked sarcastically as Elena slapped him on the arm.
"You said blood sharing was personal. Did you mean this personal?" Elena asked as Damon shook his head.
"Nope, not exactly." Damon frowned. "It's personal because for one, you need to trust the other vampire enough to know they won't drain you dry and then stake you. Plus, the vampire being fed on gets to feel what the other vampire feels who is feeding on them. It's a shared experience." he shrugged as Elena stood up and walked out of the cubicle to gather her clothes, while Damon followed her. "On the other hand..." he continued. "If the blood had vervain in it, or you don't know or like the person, it's not exactly uplifting."
"So if I'd have felt sick, you'd have felt that instead?" Elena frowned, as she started to put her clothes back on.
"Probably." Damon smiled. "It's only sexual when the vampire feeding on the other vampire finds it sexual. And feeding can be a turn on at times. I expected you to be a little bit of turned on by it, simply because you were feeding for the first time. But I didn't expect anything like that to happen." he narrowed his eyes before pulling up his jeans and fastening his belt.
"So why exactly did it happen?" Elena asked, although she was afraid she already knew the answer.
"Because you wanted it to happen Elena." Damon told her. "You drinking my blood turned you on so much, you lost control. Those emotions and sensations were passed on into me, ergo I also lost control." he sighed. "Only you can answer the question as to why it turned you on so much."
"So it never occurred to you that me feeding from you of all people would have a heightened sexual response?" Elena narrowed her eyes in surprise. Surely Damon knew how much her meant to her and how much he affected her.
Damon shook his head. "No it didn't." he said. "You chose Stefan remember?" he added bitterly.
"You know, choosing Stefan didn't make my feelings for you disappear." Elena folded her arms. "In fact ever since I turned, they've been heightened." she admitted, her voice low.
"Your feelings for everyone you care about have been heightened Elena." Damon glared at her.
"Not everyone." Elena looked at the floor sheepishly.
Damon sighed. "Okay, I'll bite. So who hasn't moved up on the Elena Gilbert ladder of magnified feelings of love?" he asked.
Elena lowered her eyes. "Stefan." she whispered.
"Oh." Damon replied, blinking with surprise. "But you loved him enough anyway. Any more and you'd explode." he shrugged.
"I'm not entirely sure I did. It certainly doesn't feel like it." Elena frowned as she walked over to Damon, cupped his cheek and began to stroke it. "He's not you." she whispered.
"I'm not following you." Damon said hesitantly.
Elena took a deep breath, she knew now was the time to admit to her ever growing feelings for Damon. He clearly hadn't picked up on it during the blood sharing. "The reason I was so turned on by drinking your blood was because it was yours. Only you could make me lose control like that. Nobody else, including Stefan makes me feel the way you do." she said lowering her eyes. "I've felt like that for a long time. I lost control in Denver too remember, so it's not just because I'm a vampire. Only this time it was a little...magnified."
"So why did you choose Stefan?" Damon asked.
"My feelings for you scared me. As I said, you make me lose control. I thought Stefan would make me feel safer." she shrugged. "I guess there was also a sense of loyalty because I thought I met him first. He saved my life after my parents died and I did dated him." she told him as tears began to fall from Elena's eyes. "I'm scared." she whispered.
"What are you scared of Elena?" Damon asked softly.
"I'm scared of my feelings for you, of losing you." she looked Damon in the eyes. "I'm scared of how much I need you in my life." she began to sob as Damon took her in his arms and held her tightly, lovingly stroking her hair.
"Hey, I'm right here." he whispered. "And I'm not going anywhere." he lifted her chin with his finger to look at her and smiled before kissing her chastely on the lips. "I'm sure we'll figure it out." he assured her.
"We've got eternity to try." Elena smiled and hiccuped.
"Exactly." Damon smiled. "But you can't just walk out on Stefan for me." he said. "You need to at least try and give it a go with him."
"It's not going to change anything." Elena sighed as she buried her head in Damon's chest.
"I know, I know." Damon whispered. "But you need to at least try, just for show. If it doesn't work then lets see what happens, okay?" he asked as Elena nodded. "Good, now dry your eyes, go home and get some rest. Then get changed because we've got a memorial to attend and your boyfriend will be waiting for you." he instructed her softly.
"Why are you being so calm about all of this?" Elena narrowed her eyes.
"Because at the end of the day, we both know what's going to happen." he smiled. "But it's going to take time. We'll just have to wait it out a little longer."
"And you promise me you'll wait?" Elena asked, her heart suddenly filled with hope since the first time she'd turned.
"I promise. Like you said, it's not like we don't have all of eternity to figure this thing out between us." Damon smiled as he kissed her on the nose. "Now we need to leave separately. You go now and I'll leave in a couple of minutes." he said.
"Okay." Elena grinned before kissing Damon on the lips. She collected her purse and quickly kissed him once more. "Thank you Damon." she smiled. "I'll see you later."
"Goodbye Elena." Damon whispered as she walked out of the door and headed towards the exit of the grill.
Elena couldn't look back. If she did, she'd want to run back into his arms and never let him go. Instead she made her way home to rest for a while before she showered and changed for the upcoming memorial in honor of the members of the town council who had died at Pastor Young's farm.
When she got home, Jeremy was out. Relieved to have the house to herself so she could get some peace and quiet, she went up to her room and closed her curtains. Since she'd turned, Elena had hardly slept due to her heightened sense of hearing. She hadn't yet quite worked out how to ignore the more intrusive sounds. Elena set her alarm to go off in two hours and fell fast asleep.
Elena woke with a start her alarm ringing out loudly. It was the first reasonable amount of sleep she'd had in days. She yawned as she suddenly began to recollect what had transpired between her and Damon, or had it? Elena sighed with a mixture of relief and disappointment when she realized she hadn't actually had sex with Damon. The only thing which had happened between them was the blood sharing and hips grinding together. In an amazing twist, they'd managed to control themselves enough to restrict their encounter to only dry humping. However, even that had been the most incredible sexual experience she'd ever had, and she knew it affected Damon in exactly the same way. A combination of blood sharing and dry humping had caused them to both reach their climax in the Grill rest room. Damon hadn't needed to explain why it was personal, she figured that one out all by herself, although it wasn't totally clear if it was his blood which caused her orgasm or her proximity to Damon. If Stefan were to ever find out about the blood sharing, them both finding their release would have to be kept between her and Damon. Yet for some reason, Elena didn't feel guilty about what they'd done, even when she realized the magnitude of what she and Damon had been doing.
Out of all of her dreams in her Damon dream journal, other than Denver, this one was the closest she'd experienced to reality. And even though she loved Stefan, she knew something was missing. She couldn't understand why she still having dreams about Damon after she'd chosen Stefan. Elena hadn't had real sex since mid April, which was nearly eight months ago, and she wondered if that might be the issue. All she needed was physical relief.
Elena looked at her clock and decided she'd got just enough time to put pen to paper and update her Damon diary. Elena reached under her bed and took it out from its hiding place. She opened it to the next blank page, and began to write. Dear Diary...
This is the first chapter where I had to describe the real sensation of blood sharing. I have decided to portray how the blood sharing works, based upon the dreams and experiences vampires can give each other, like when Lexi makes Stefan think he's starving in S3. My idea is when vampires are blood sharing, they share thoughts, feelings and experiences with the other vampire. Experienced vampires can control what they feel or see. Because Elena is new, her control is limited meaning Damon feels most of it too. They can't experience each other's orgasms. To me this was the most realistic idea I could envision to work within the narrative of the show.
Thank you all for your wonderful reviews. They are always appreciated.
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Mandzipop.