Sorry I'm late guys. Just one chapter this week. I've had just a crazy time. Since Erza got to the guild Saturday I've had to call poison control when my Little Flower tried to eat a laundry fling, my Wildcat tried to wash all the rugs in her sister's bath (trust me that's a big deal), had a weeks worth of paperwork (that now needs to be reproduced) go Kapoof at work, and had to take Little Flower to the ER to get a total of 9 stitches due to a play related accident (she was brave and is going to be fine). Life sucks.
In other news... for anyone interested who remembers that joint mission Lucy and Meredy mentioned a few chapters back, we won't do that here however sassykitten1701 and I are writing that as a separate story we are calling Overkill Fieldtrip. Also I'm working on a few little things that invaded and are just cute and fun and I can jot down with little to no focusing. Kudos to sassykitten1701 for helping me with proofing and ideas.
Hiro Mashima blah blah Fairy Tail blah blah.
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At some point that afternoon the intellectuals stole the S-class balcony and kicked everyone else out. Literally in Natsu's case. Turns out there were more books and letters people in the guild than Bickslow and Laxus thought. Freed, Lucy, Levy, Meredy, Wendy, Evergreen, Jellal, Kinana, Laki, Lisanna, Reedus, and even Juvia were all up there behind a rune barrier.
Meredy's bemoaning of the paperwork backlog limiting her time with Laxus had resulted in Lucy getting helpful ideas. Freed and Lucy had jumped on the chance to get elbow deep in the guild's books. Reedus and Evergreen were up there mostly to avoid being caught up in whatever brawl the guild was going to inevitably get caught up in without their more peaceful members. Jellal had been voluntold into joining them due to his background with the council. Erza had volunteered to help, but her assistance was rejected by a pale faced Lucy. Mira would have been up there, but that would have left the bar unattended by anyone but Cana and Makarov and nobody wanted that.
Laxus himself had been banished to the ground floor once the brain people saw the state of his paperwork. He and the Master were getting some very dark looks thrown their way. Apparently whatever they had been doing or not doing with that paperwork was bad. Levy just about had a seizure at one point. Ever and Lucy had talked Freed out of a hyperventilating state twice now.
The entire guild was glad that rune barrier blocked sound both ways, because nobody wanted to know what the smart people were saying. If it was just about Makarov it would be funny, but they kept slamming papers down and glaring at other guild members before waving their arms and, it was only assumed since they couldn't hear, yelling and screaming. Jellal was the only calm one and they weren't sure if that was a good thing because he kept saying, well they didn't know what, but it was making Lucy and Levy smile like Cobra so it was scary.
Bickslow was watching all this from a table he somehow ended up sharing with, not only Cobra, but Gajeel and Erza as well when Jellal said something that brought every pair of eyes on the second floor up to look at him. A great deal of animated chatter and waving of arms ensued. Then the girls broke into happy bouncing that the men below greatly appreciated. High-fives began being exchanged and Lucy stuck her head past the glowing runes to grin down at their table.
"Hey, Sugar Sucker!" Cobra growled before answering.
"What the hell do you want, Tits?" That little nickname almost got him decapitated the first 17 times Erza heard it. He had intentionally used it far more often than necessary just to irritate her. Even now the red-head was glaring at him and he was grinning.
"Think you can sign a written statement that Fairy Tail risked their lives to kick your ass and save the world, twice, and get any shady friends you still have contact with to do the same so we can get the council to pay us for it?" The poison slayer cackled for a second.
"We get ten percent of whatever you get in exchange." They all assumed Lucy let out a whoop of victory but she had already pulled her head back behind the barrier so they couldn't hear to be certain. "Damn that woman's got balls." Bickslow and Gajeel both nodded in agreement. Erza looked highly offended.
"You dare to speak of Lucy that way after demanding payment for your wrongdoing?"
"I absolutely dare."
"You..." Given that Lucy was busy Bickslow felt a little obligated to attempt to keep the peace between two people she considered friends.
"Erza, he didn't mean to insult her. That's the nicest thing he's said to anyone today."
"That is no excuse!"
"She-Thor's right. I should have tried harder to make that sound demeaning." Bickslow slammed his head against the table.
"Would you stop trying to ge-"
"I should have said her balls are almost as big and hairy as mine." When Erza began to look like she would end Cobra's existence this time Bix shoved him off the bench. He was saving his life, and he was annoying. Unfortunately the shove had a side effect of tripping another guild member, who slammed into Natsu's back, planting his face in his fire chicken. Oops.
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"Freed, could you add another layer to the runes? The boys started fighting again." Freed sighed and began adding reflective words to the barrier. Levy let out a snort and pointed.
"The boys and Erza." Erza chose that moment to throw Gajeel across the room. The iron slayer used a support beam to swing himself back into the fight, his feet connecting with the back of Gray's head. Juvia jerked to a stand and slowly forced herself to sit back down.
"Oh my Mavis." Lisanna held up a piece of paper. "Here's another one. Team Shadowgear. Droy tore down a 100 year old chapel. Levy please tell me you were furious when that happened and did something horrible to him."
"Uhh... when did that happen?"
"It was... two years ago? What the hell! Why does Laxus have this? Master should have finished it ages ago!" Lisanna stormed over to the barrier and stuck her head out. She yelled something in Mira's direction and received a happy smile and a nod. Master paled and wilted where he sat on the bar. Lisanna pointed at him and whatever she said caused him to start crying. The girl had a smug look on her face as she returned. Makarov could be seen arguing with a smiling Mirajane down below.
"What on earth did you say to them?" Evergreen used her fan to push a completed form toward Jellal as she spoke.
"The bar won't be serving Gramps any alcohol till this is caught up." Sounds of approval were heard from across the balcony. "I told him if he doesn't like it he can get his lazy ass up here and help us."
"I'm not sure you want Makarov up here." Jellal mumbled. "His handwriting is almost as bad as Erza's." Lucy shuddered.
"Lucy," Wendy spoke quietly. "I love him dearly, but we are going to have to do something about Natsu."
"My rent and I have been saying that for years. He's gotten a lot better since..." Lucy blushed and fell silent. Lisanna giggled.
"Since we started having sex?"
"Well I wasn't going to just come out and say that!"
"And for that we were tres reconnaissant."
"Sorry Reedus, but it's true."
"Ladies can we focus on the point Miss Wendy was trying to make?"
"Thank you, Freed. So I know other people can be almost as bad, but fire spreads. Natsu is going to have to learn to control himself before someone gets hurt."
"Wendy is right." Evergreen's fan fluttered faster the longer she talked. "Lucy has only lost the occasional curtain and her wardrobe several times over, but it's only a matter of time before something goes dreadfully wrong. Someone could end up dead. Some innocent child could be in the wrong place at the wrong time and lose a limb. Natsu isn't the only one either. It doesn't take much power for a loose spell to... to cause a pregnant woman to lose her baby."
"Mavis!" A ghost white Lisanna gasped. "As many of us as are settling into real relationships that really is a concern!" More than Lisanna knew given that Evergreen was pregnant, though the guild hadn't been told yet. "What should we do?"
"Laxus." The group turned to stare at Lucy. "Ask Laxus. He had a really good idea the other day when we talked about this. I'll see if Bix might be able to help too."
"Why would Bickslow be helpful here?" Kinana wasn't the only one who didn't see her logic.
"Soul magic guys. Just let me ask him maybe he can, maybe he can't. We'll see." Bickslow wasn't comfortable using his magic around people so he might not be willing, let alone able, but she thought it would be good for both him and the guild if he would try. "First though we should finish up here and talk to Laxus."
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"Boss, if you were that far behind why didn't you ask us for help?" When Laxus looked at him that way he always knew sarcasm was about to happen in a major way.
"You wanted me to ask you to sit still for hours on end in a small room and write the same damn thing over and over and over on a hundred identical pieces of paper?" Bickslow shuddered. That really did sound like hell.
"Well, Freed would have helped."
"Freed has a life. At least he did." Laxus scowled, no doubt thinking about the person their friend had given months of his life to only for whatever they had to end before the team even met them.
"Think Demon will be fine." Cobra plopped down at their table and glared at the purple runes keeping them from their girlfriends. "Tits talked to him. She knows. She will make sure he is taken care of." Laxus scoffed.
"What? So now Blondie is everybody's fairy godmother?" Bickslow stock his tongue out and laughed.
"Come on, Boss. You've seen it. I know you have. Everything Cosplayer touches gets, well, it just gets better. If she got Freed to talk to her then she will take care of him, just like Cyclops said."
"We're his team. We can take care of him without her."
"In case you haven't noticed, Cosplayer has pulled us onto her family. There's no escaping her helpfulness now." Cobra cackled.
"She told Think Demon that they were in-laws now. You're stuck with her." Bix could feel himself blushing.
"Sh-she did?"
"There was a little more to it than that, but yeah." Bickslow dropped his head to the table and folded his arms around it in a sad attempt to hide his big goofy grin. He wasn't sure if he was really supposed to yet, or how to tell her, or even if he should, but he loved his crazy Cosplayer so much. There was no way he could deny it at this point.
Lucy trusted him, cared about him, loved his babies. She had won over Evergreen with just a few words and a hug. Laxus really liked her, though he acted as if her presence irritated him, not that it fooled anyone. His best friend kissed Meredy in full view of the guild and kept her tucked against him whenever she was close enough and still tried to tell those brave enough to say anything that he felt nothing. Whatever she had talked to Freed about had obviously brought the two of them quite close if their interactions over the past two days were any indication.
Labeling his team as her in-laws was a pretty firm way of claiming him as hers, not that she hadn't verbally claimed him already just that had a permanent feel to it. She had tied her soul to him and was literally feeding his soul with happiness and affection. The entire guild and even people in the town were looking at him, his babies, and his team in an entirely new way thanks to Lucy. He owed her everything, and that's exactly what he planned to give her.
He was jolted from his happy, fuzzy, rainbow thoughts by someone slamming their hands down onto the table. He yanked his hands up and found himself looking in the narrowed eyes of Erza Scarlet. She didn't look angry exactly, but she did look quite focused, on him. He swallowed.
"So." She spoke slowly and drew her words out to make them sound like a threat. "You are dating Lucy." He thought they had already done this, but he guessed they were doing it again. The fact that Lucy wasn't present greatly decreased his odds of surviving intact this time around though.
"Yes. We are very much dating." She raised an eyebrow at him.
"Very much?" Maybe that sounded bad.
"I meant I'm very much dedicated to this relationship?" He hadn't meant for that to sound like a question, but he had no idea what the woman wanted.
"Oh? And how long will this... relationship be lasting? In your opinion?" This question he knew the answer to and didn't even have to think about.
"Until Lucy leaves me and no matter what I do she refuses to come back. In other words forever if I have a choice." Erza blinked at him in shock. He was pretty sure she wasn't the only one. Cobra snorted.
"Y'all are a bunch of idiots. You seriously thought they would waltz in here with their junk hanging out and do dick windmills in front of her team if they didn't mean it?" Bickslow glared at him.
"Really? Even I think that's gross. Could you not... You're an asshole." The slayer just shrugged.
"Yeah, but I'm right."
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To be continued