Chapter 8: Our Love Is God

~Rick~

I lead the way through the alleys surrounding the Sanctuary, the Scavengers trailing behind me. I find a small group of walkers feeding on a body hanging from a ladder by one building. They turn as they sense me approaching, and my stomach drops as I see the white armband wrapped around the body's bicep.

He's one of ours.

I can't tell who it is, even after I've killed the walkers and cut him down. I take the walkie from his belt, ordering, "Snipers, report in." I don't get an answer, and I turn over my shoulder to see Jadis watching me from a distance. "This is Rick Grimes. Does anybody copy?"

I get nothing but static in response.

I take the sniper's rifle, climbing up the water tower in which he was stationed. I swing my legs over the railing when I reach the top, taking the rifle off my back. I lift the scope to my eye, looking to the courtyard of the Sanctuary.

Daryl, what did you do?!

The courtyard is strewn with piles of walker bodies, one of our trucks crashed into one entrance into the building.

I raise the walkie, hands shaking as I order, "North, South, West, report."

I don't get an answer.

I scramble down the ladder, leading the rest of the Scavengers onward, closer to the Sanctuary. We make it to the edge of the courtyard, slowing to stop and looking around. "Different from picture," Jadis remarks, referring to the picture I showed her with the herd surrounding the building.

Gunfire erupts, and we race for cover. I split off from them, ducking behind a jersey wall. "Jadis!" I shout, covering my head. "It's coming from the window! We hit and we fall…" I look up, finding the Scavengers retreating and leaving me here. "...back."

Luckily, a vehicle comes to my rescue. I can see Carol in the driver's seat as she pulls to a stop in front of me, covering me as I leap over the jersey wall to rush to the vehicle. I duck down as the glass in one of the back windows shatters, shouting, "Go!"

Carol quickly backs out of the courtyard, Jerry looking over his shoulder as he inquires, "You good, dude?"

"They got out," I reply. "It hasn't been long. We have to warn everyone. They're gonna hit back."

"We can get the cars near the East lookout and split up," Carol suggests.

"Might have to find other rides," Jerry says. "The snipers probably used theirs to get away."

"I don't think they got away," I say, and that's when it hits me. If Negan got out, he's going to be heading back to Alexandria. He's going to be heading for my home, for where my children are.

~Clary~

I close my eyes as I press my nose into the sweater I took from Eric's closet, finding that it still smells like him. My still wet hair falls onto my shoulders, and I lift my head to look at Carl. I smile softly as I watch Carl brush his wet hair out of his face. I glance down at Judith as she climbs up on the couch and looks at Carl over the back of it, still half asleep from the nap she just woke up from.

"You hungry?" Carl questions when he realizes that I'm looking at him. "I'm cooking. What shall it be?" I open my mouth to suggest spaghetti, but close it, pulling my knees up to my chest. "Clary? You alright?"

"Yeah, yeah," I say, nodding. "It's just… I was gonna suggest spaghetti, but that's a Raleigh thing. It's what we used to do. It was the Raleigh family tradition—serious spaghetti."

"How can spaghetti be serious?" Carl questions, coming over to sit with me on the couch. He sits at the opposite end, taking Judith into his lap when she crawls over to him. "It doesn't make sense."

"It's just somethin' Aaron said," I tell him, launching into the story of where Daryl and I went the night of Deanna's party. Carl nods along, smiling softly. "And, basically, serious spaghetti has been our thing ever since. Daryl, me, Aaron, and Eric." I look down. "Guess it's just me now, huh? Eric's gone, and Aaron and Daryl are God knows where."

"They'll be back," Carl assures me. "They will. They got you here."

"I just hope you're right," I murmur. "I miss them. I just hope Dad gets back soon, safe and sound."

~Aaron~

I look over to the passenger seat when I hear someone speaking, snapping back from my reverie as I realize Enid's sitting there. "Sorry," I say. "I was just…"

"What?" Enid inquires.

"Uh, Eric and I used to take trips like this… back when we were looking for people to bring to Alexandria. We drove to the Hilltop just a few days ago and helped armor those cars. He was always right there, right where you are now. I was just… remembering that."

"I'm sorry," Enid whispers, then glances down. "When we get back, remind me to find Clary. I know what she's going through, but God, it's horrible. The Saviors, calling her the Orphan? That's even worse, being forced to be reminded of it like that."

"I need to make sure he died for a reason." I glance over at Enid. "Tell me what you were saying?"

"I was just thinking about Oceanside," she tells me. "Wondering if they'll talk to us."

"I hope so. We got to try not to scare them. Tara said that, up until her, they killed on sight. It's going to be a risk. And I'm sorry for putting you in danger, but—"

"But I asked to come," Enid points out.

"Still, it's a risk. We need to have them be a part of this. We just have to convince them. We have to."

"We should've brought guns for them," Enid suggests.

"We have to hold on to those guns."

"I could give Cyndie mine."

"You're gonna need your gun, Enid."

"Right. I just want it to end before that."

"I do, too." Enid looks away, out the window. I question, "You know how to drive?"

"Yeah. Well, sort of. I'm better than Carl, anyways. But Clary…" Enid chuckles. "Clary's got me beat. She's a badass with a motorcycle."

"And she worries the hell out of me whenever she takes off on that thing," I say. "You want to drive?"

Enid nods, and I stop the car. We switch, and I take over looking at the map as Enid drives, glancing down as she makes a turn I didn't direct her to make. "Why are you turning?" I ask. "We're supposed to be going straight."

"I just want to check something out," Enid answers. "Maybe it's just about giving them something they can use."

I chuckle, catching sight of the sign for the distillery. "You're right," I say. "We can't show up empty handed. Social graces."

Enid chuckles, and I ask, "Have I told you the story about the cannery Daryl and I checked out?"

"Isn't that where you guys met Morgan?" Enid questions.

"Yeah, after we were trapped in a car surrounded by walkers." I glance down at my hands. "Daryl was gonna sacrifice himself so I could escape. He asked me to take care of Clary."

"And you did. You still are." Enid glances over at me. "How'd you get trapped in the car?"

"The cannery was a trap. Tripwires, hidden walkers, the whole nine yards."

Enid swallows. "Well… I hope the distillery isn't like that."

"It won't be," I assure her, but I still find myself hoping the same thing. "It'll be fine. Everything's gonna work out."

~Daryl~

Michonne looks up from where she kneels next to Judith by the lake, catching sight of me. Judith gives her a goodbye kiss as Michonne starts to get up, walking up to meet me. "Hey," she says as she approaches. "I'm glad you came back. It's better we go out there together."

"It worked," I tell her. "We'll roll in, tell 'em to give up. They're gonna give up."

"I'm sorry," she apologizes. "I couldn't."

"Don't be," I tell her.

Michonne looks like she's about to say something, but a shout from down the street cuts her off. "Daryl!" Clary shouts.

She runs to meet me, and I open my arms, knowing what's coming. She collides into me, squeezing her arms around my waist and burying her face in my chest. Carl gives me a small smile from down the street as I wrap my arms around Clary. "I thought you were gone," Clary whimpers, and it doesn't take much for me to pick up on the catch in her voice. "I thought you left for good or wouldn't make it back."

"It's gonna take more than that," I tell her. "C'mon, you know that. We're Dixons, remember?"

"Not me," Clary replies. "I'm a Raleigh."

"You got Dixon blood, but you're a Raleigh at heart." I ruffle her hair. "No better combination."

Clary pulls back, looking up at me. "Where the hell'd you even go?"

"It worked," I tell her. "I had a plan, and it worked. The walkers got in. We're makin' 'em pay. They're gonna give up. It'll all be over soon."

Clary glances back at Carl as he approaches, murmuring, "I know."

I take Clary's arm before Carl can reach us, pulling her off to the side. "Sorry, kid," I tell Carl. "Emergency sibling thing."

"I'll see you later, babe," Clary calls after Carl as I lead her down the street. "Daryl, hey! What the hell! Where are we going?"

"We gotta talk," I tell her, pulling her into our garage. I close the garage door, shutting us off from the outside. "This… isn't somethin' the others can hear."

"Darry, tell me what's goin' on right now," Clary demands, taking my wrists with fear in her eyes. "Oh, god, tell me you ain't dyin'."

"No," I answer with a shake of my head. "It's about Rick."

~Enid~

Aaron reaches into the backseat, tapping me awake. I wake with a start, grabbing my gun. I lean forward, and he holds up a hand, shushing me. He points towards the truck from the distillery (which didn't turn out like the cannery, thank goodness), where I can see the someone's shadow as they approach.

I flip the safety off my gun as we quietly open the doors, weapons raised. We start forward, splitting up at the truck. Aaron goes around the front, while I take the back. I hear Aaron grunt, followed by a thump. I rush around the truck as a woman growls, "You shouldn't have come here."

I find her standing above Aaron, a spear raised. I fire, shocked at my own actions as I watch her body drop. I hurry over to Aaron, helping him sit up. He groans as he pushes himself up, a cut above his eye from where she struck him. We're surrounded, one woman ordering, "Drop it, now! Get up, slow."

I drop the gun, and they keep their weapons trained on us as we rise. I recognize Cyndie as she pushes forward through them, asking, "Grandma?" Her voice breaks as she turns over the body of the woman I shot. "Grandma?"

I recognize Natania below us, dead. Aaron and I look at each other, and I know there's no way they'll listen now. In fact, I might have just gotten Aaron and I killed.

~Clary~

"Clary, honey, you okay?" Daryl questions, resting a hand on my shoulder. "You haven't said anything for a while."

"I… I know Rick's gettin' colder and colder," I say, "but…"

"Hey, I don't want you thinkin' about that," Daryl says, pulling me to my feet. "C'mon, we'll go find Carl, okay? He knows what to say, doesn't he?"

I nod, and Daryl opens the garage door. He keeps his hand on my shoulder as we walk, both of us averting our eyes at Eric's name on the memorial wall. I completely freeze when I hear the first bang on the metal gate, recognizing it immediately. Two more knocks follow, then microphone feedback, and I voice I never want to hear.

"You may be wondering why the hell your lookouts didn't sound the alarm," Negan says. "See, we are polite. I mean, I don't know when they're gonna wake up from that kind of shot, but they should wake up. So let's just cut through the cow shit—you lose. It's over. So you're gonna line up in front of your little houses, and you're gonna work up some apologies, and then the person with the lamest one is gonna get killed. Then I kill Rick in front of everybody, and we move on. You have three—count 'em—three minutes to open this gate, or we start bombing the shit out of you!"

"They got out," I whisper.

It sends chills down my spine as Negan starts whistling. God, I fucking hate that whistle. As soon as I see Carl arriving with Michonne, I grab his hand, pulling him inside the house. "What the hell is going on?" Carl demands. "How the hell is Negan here?"

"Daryl said the walkers got in," I tell him. "Negan shouldn't've been able to get out."

Carl puts his hat on the table, sighing. "Clary," Carl says, glancing up at me. "You got any ideas?"

I pause for a moment before questioning, "Have you ever heard of Heathers?" Carl nods once. "You remember how it ended?"

"You're thinkin' of blowin' it all to hell," Carl realizes, then smiles softly. "You know, you always did remind me a little of JD. You're CD, and our love is God."

I smirk. "So we do it. We burn 'em down."

"And you'll build the world again."

"We'll finish this war."

Carl grins, nodding. "You and me, babe, we'll win this thing. We can end it all, tonight. We get our people safe, trick the Saviors into thinking we're fleeing, and you and I'll stay and end it. We'll bomb the shit out of them."

"And they'll die because we say they must," I say. "I like this, Carl, you and me leading this new world. We'll run this place. The world will be ours for the making and taking."

"No, we won't," Carl says. "You and I both know this is my last stand. This will be your place to run." Carl leans in, pressing a kiss to my neck before whispering in my ear, "A new sheriff's come to town, after all." He grabs his hat off the table, putting it on my head. "You gotta look the part."

I have to smile at him, no matter how small it is, because I remember all the times he's put that hat on my head. "Hey," I say softly. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Carl replies.

"I love you, Carl, more than anything. I'd do anything for you. Remember when I said I'd take those bullets for you?" Carl nods. "It's not just bullets."

As I say that, my eyes drift to his abdomen. To his bite.

"You can't mean that," Carl says with a shake of his head. "I mean, c'mon, Clary. Taking a bullet for me is one thing. Signing your death certificate? That's not you."

"But I'd do it for you," I whisper. "In a heartbeat. I'd give up a heart still beating for you."

"Clary, it's the shock talking," Carl tells me. "I know you'd die for any one of us, but not that way. I know we don't have a choice in who or what punches our ticket, or when we die—"

"But I'm choosing now," I say, grasping his hands. "I'm making a choice. It's what I want to do, and I need you to back me on it. Let me sacrifice myself to Negan. You know he's gonna want someone, no matter what we do. You're dying. Let me die, too. I don't want to be a widow before I'm a bride."

Carl shakes his head. "No. No, you got a life left to live. And I know you may not keep promises sometimes, but you need to stay alive for Aaron. Losing you too would kill him." Carl presses his forehead against mine. "Hey, no one, except the Saviors, has to die, you got that? None of us do."

"Then why are you?"

"I wish I had the answer, but I just don't, Dix," Carl murmurs. "We'll be together again, come dawn or danger."

~Jesus~

I glance over at Maggie as I drive, asking, "You think they'll surrender?"

"They will," she assures me. "Eventually."

"Not now?"

"Would we give up that quick?" Maggie returns.

"No, we wouldn't."

"Damn straight," Neil says from the backseat.

"If they don't surrender today, they will soon. Just need to run out of food, water… choices." I nod, and Maggie suddenly orders, "Slow down."

I do, taking note of the tree laying across the road ahead of us. "What is it?" Dianne questions.

"Tree in the road," Maggie answers. "Wasn't there before."

"Could've fallen on its own," I offer, trying to stay optimistic. "Trees do that."

"It's them." Shit. "Something happened."

I stop the car, unable to go any further with the tree blocking our way. The rest of the caravan stops, Maggie ordering into the walkie, "Bertie, turn around. Bertie!"

But Bertie can't turn around. Headlights appear at the top of the hill, and we can do nothing but sit and wait as the Saviors drive up alongside us. The box truck stops in front of us, and the Savior I recognize as Gary forces Jerry out onto the pavement on his knees. The rest of the Saviors get out of their vehicles, aiming their weapons as they surround the rest of the caravan.

The other two Saviors in the box truck carry a wooden coffin with holes drilled into it out, propping it up against the hood of our truck. Finally, the Savior in charge of this group exits the truck. "Hello, hello, hello!" Simon calls as he approaches. "Ah, what a damn nice night."

Maggie tenses beside me, and we both know that someone is going to die before the Saviors let us go tonight. I flick my eyes to the sky, knowing that one of us won't see the sunrise. We're not all making it to morning.

~Clary~

"You need to make it look like we're escaping out back," Carl orders as we load our bags with flash bangs and smoke grenades. "Get to the woods, halfway to the quarry, and cut the lights. Get enough of a lead on 'em, hit 'em, and get away on foot. You know where we'll be. Just have to get the guns, get everyone else here, and we'll meet you there."

"Two minutes, people!" Negan calls. "Dig deep! I want these apologies memorable. Bonus points for creativity. Work up a poem, sing a song. I love that shit."

"Darry, get ready to get going," I order. "I'll signal you when."

"Tobin, your group, go," Carl orders. "There's gonna be people in the infirmary. They're gonna need your help."

"Look, we got guns, we can fight them," Tara says.

"We will, but not now," Rosita says. "Carl's right."

"Carl, we can't just let them have this place," Michonne says.

"We can," Carl returns. "All we need to do is survive tonight. This is my show, you said that. This is our plan, and you're all gonna do it. So let's go!"

Daryl claps Carl's shoulder as we pass each other, Daryl and the girls going one way while Carl and I go in the opposite direction.

"One minute!" Negan shouts.

Carl and I race to the gate, and Negan calls, "Okie dokie! You brought this on yourself, Rick. See, I was willing to work with you. All you had to do was follow a few very simple rules. Now? Well, now I see that you just got to go. Scorched earth, you dick!"

"He's not home," Carl says from where he stands at the watchpost atop the wall. I stay on the ground, waiting to signal Daryl.

I can hears the guns cocking, knowing they're being aimed at Carl. I turn, taking aim through the gate, knowing while I can't see much, I'll hit someone. "Oh, holy shit!" Negan laughs. "Everybody hold your fire! It's Carl! Look at you. Answering the door like a big boy! I am so proud. Daddy's not home, huh? Well, I guess he's gonna get back to a big ole smoky surprise."

"There's families in here," Carl says. His voice is dripping with venom, just daring Negan to try to fuck with us now, when we've got nothing to lose. "Kids. My little sister."

"Well, that shit just breaks my heart." I lower my gun, dropping my bag at the ladder as I make the decision to make my stand with Carl. "There's kids at the Sanctuary. You must've seen 'em. Even had a little baby at one of the outposts. I wonder what happened to her."

"She's safe," I pipe up.

"Ooh!" Negan exclaims. "Is that a Dixon I hear?!"

I'm already on my way up to join Carl, and as soon as I'm up on the watchpost I can see Negan below. He has a microphone in his hand, grinning when he sees me. I correct him, "It's Raleigh. And it still is, even after your people killed my father."

"Right, Little Orphan Annie up there, talkin' big shit about an apple pie life where everything works out," Negan returns. "But guess what? None of this shit is fair, kid. Hell, you both know that. You had to kill your own mom. You've killed thirty-seven people, but that number's higher by now, isn't it? That is fucked up. Ergo, we need someone in charge who's willing to do whatever it takes to make sure that shit doesn't happen. Oh, wait. That's me!"

"Bad shit does happen," Carl says. "But we can figure this out. We can stop this."

"Oh now you want to talk? See, your dad had it that I died, no matter what. He gave my people a choice. Not me. Now we're gonna need a new understanding. Apologies, punish—"

Carl blurts, "Kill me."

Negan freezes, and I look at Carl out of the corner of my eye, whispering, "Carl…"

"I know what I'm doing," he replies.

Negan slowly steps towards the wall, softly questioning, "What did you say?"

"If you have to kill someone, if there has to be punishment, then kill me."

"Carl," I try.

"I'm serious," he tells me, squeezing my hand.

"I can't let you do this," I say, then turn to Negan. "No, not him. You take me."

Carl takes a step forward, and we share a look before he turns to Negan. He says, "Kill both of us."

Negan pauses for a moment before saying, "You want to die?"

"Yes," I answer.

I don't think Negan was expecting that honest of an answer, but he quickly recovers. "Well, Bonnie wants to die. How about you, Clyde?"

Carl answers, "No, I don't. But I will, and if you kill me, Clary will find a way, so you may as well kill her, too. It's gonna happen. And if our deaths can stop this, if it can make things different, for us, for you, for all those other kids, it'd be worth it. I mean, was this the plan? Was it supposed to be this way?"

"It was always gonna be this way," I say. I look towards Carl. "'Cause we're the asteroid that's overdue."

"Kid?" Negan questions, clearly confused.

"The dinosaurs will turn to dust."

"What does that mean?"

I raise my fist, the signal to Daryl to get ready. "They'll die because I say they must!"

I bring my fist down, and Daryl hits the gas. His convoy breaks out of Alexandria, momentarily drawing Negan's attention. A group of Saviors will be after them soon, but the distraction gives Carl and I enough time to quickly climb down from the watchpost. Carl lets go a little over halfway down, dropping and, unbalanced, falling onto his back. I slide down, offering my hand. I pull Carl to his feet, and we both grab our bags.

"This is it," I tell him. "What we do here tonight, it'll end this. No matter if we live or die, this right here, tonight, is the end of it all. This world's gonna be turned upside down."

"Son of a bitch, Carl!" Negan shouts. "Was that just a play?! I thought we were having a moment, you little asshole! Bombs away!"

We start pulling the pins on the smoke grenades, throwing them down. We watch as there's an explosion within Father Gabriel's church, flames billowing out and shattering the windows. We keep moving, hoping that we can distract the Saviors long enough that our people can hide and make it through the night. We keep moving, up until a car explodes right in front of us.

I throw my arms up to cover my face, the blast knocking us to the ground. I groan as I push myself up on my forearms, then let out a hiss of pain. Carl reaches over, taking my hand. "You're hurt."

"Well, they're bombing the shit out of us. One of us is bound to get burned," I return. I can hardly hear myself, my ears ringing from the explosion. The burn on my arm hurts like hell, but we've just gotta keep pushing on.

Carl and I get to our feet, keeping on the move. It's too dangerous to stay in one place for too long. We walk up the steps onto the porch of Tobin's house, trying to catch our breath. We turn, watching Tobin lead a group of Alexandrians down the street. "Go with them," Carl manages, then swallows, his voice stronger as he repeats, "Go, Clary. Go with them."

"No, I'm not leaving you!" I object.

"Baby, you gotta go," Carl tries.

"No! You need me, and I need you! Where you go, I go. I don't give a shit if this is your show, because it's ours now! This is our home, our place, and we are not letting a bunch of self-righteous, asshole, psychopaths take it!"

Carl and I both glance at the house next to us as we hear glass shattering, and Carl barks, "Go! Run!"

We take off, the explosion throwing us as the grenade inside goes off. It's a struggle to even stay awake now, and I wrap my arm around Carl as we push ourselves up. We support each other, making our way through Alexandria.

A grenade goes off at the gate, and the Saviors bust through the gate. I whisper, "It's over, baby. We gotta go. We lost."

"We haven't lost yet," Carl replies. "'Cause we're still breathing."

The Saviors split off, but Carl and I are almost at the entrance to the sewer where everyone else is hiding. One of them spots us, shouting, "On the ground, kid!"

Carl drops a smoke grenade, hiding us from the Saviors' sight. They rush forward, but when the smoke clears, Carl and I watch from below in the sewer as they look around. To the Saviors, we've vanished into thin air.

~Dwight~

"Stop the car!" Laura exclaims, the road ahead filled with smoke. "Stop the car, D."

"I just wanna take a closer look," I say, continuing on.

"D, stop the damn car! You're leading the trucks right into it! You're gonna get us killed!"

I only stop the car when we're in the smoke, knowing that's where the Alexandrians are hiding in wait. They open fire, and we scramble for cover. I duck down on the ground on the side of my truck, then draw my gun. I push myself up, looking over the hood at the group in the woods. I can see Daryl and Rosita, plus two others. I squeeze my eyes shut, making my choice.

I spin and fire on the Saviors.

One, two, three, four, five.

Then, I'm the only one left. Or so I think.

Laura rounds the back of the car, raising her gun on me. I don't know if I have any bullets left in my gun and I don't waste time firing a possibly empty gun. I charge her, but Laura fires, a bullet tearing through my arm. I drop to the ground with a groan, and Laura's got it all figured out now.

"That's why you didn't want to block the gate with the trucks," she says. "That's why you drove right into this! It was you! All of it! You tell them to stop! Stop them!"

"It doesn't work like that," I pant, holding my arm with my other hand.

Glass shatters as the Alexandrians' bullets strike the truck, and Laura ducks and turns to run. I lunge for another gun, trying to aim and fire before Laura disappears, but she's gone by the time I get the gun up. I drop it, curling in on myself in pain.

"It's over!" I shout. The Alexandrians emerge a moment later, and I see that the other two that are with Daryl and Rosita are Tara and Michonne. Tara kicks the gun on the ground away, and Rosita picks it up. "I made sure you guys could get out the back," I tell them. "I drove the convoy right up to the roadblock. I knew what it was. I can't go back. One of 'em got away. She's gonna tell them."

"How'd they get out?" Daryl demands, lowering his gun. "Was it what I did?"

"Eugene," I answer. "I can still help you. I know how they work, how Negan thinks. I want you to win. I want Negan to die. And we can settle up after."

Daryl reaches forward, grabbing his vest and pulling it off of me. Michonne and Tara gather the guns from the fallen Saviors, Michonne saying, "We need to go. Now."

Daryl nods and follows the two, leaving Rosita with me. She sighs before taking my uninjured arm and hauling me to my feet. "C'mon," she says. "We gotta go."

We stand around the entrance to the sewer, listening as the explosions continue within Alexandria. Tara leads the way down into the sewer, followed by Rosita. I look over to Michonne, who stares at Alexandria with horror. "I'm sorry," I tell her.

She doesn't seem to hear me. Daryl ushers me down into the sewer before following. Michonne still remains above, staring at Alexandria. "Michonne!" Rosita hisses. "Michonne!"

Michonne looks down, only sparing a nod.

"Michonne!" Rosita tries once more. Michonne doesn't even look down, instead closing the manhole covering on us.

~Clary~

No one meets his eyes.

We all know by now. Even Dwight.

No one can look at Rick Grimes.

We all know what he's going to lose, while he has no clue.

I glance towards Rick, but just as he comes closer, I turn back to Dwight and his injured arm. He's lucky—Laura's shot was a through and through. Dwight lets out a hiss of pain as I tighten the bandage around his arm. "Sorry," I mutter.

"I probably deserve it," he replies, giving me a small grin. I know what Dwight's trying to do; take my mind off of Carl, just for a moment, at least. "Hey. I really am sorry I shot you. I didn't realize, and by then, it was too late."

"I know," I softly say.

"And I'm sorry about your parents."

"I still have Aaron. Wherever he is."

"Right, sorry. The Saviors call you the Orphan. I just assumed. But your other dad, I am sorry."

"You're sorry for a lot, D," I reply.

"A lot of this is on me."

I glance over my shoulder at Carl as Rick kneels in front of him. "Not everything," I whisper.

Dwight places his hand on top of the one I still have resting on his arm. "I'm sorry about that, too." Dwight glances down, catching sight of my burn from the explosions. "And I'm sorry about that."

I suck in a shaky breath, squeezing my eyes shut, as I hear Michonne let out a sob. Dwight squeezes my hand, but I pull away from him, dropping to my knees beside Carl. I press my face into the crook of his neck, and I can feel it.

The fever's begun.

This really is the end, isn't it?