Like Cats and Dogs

by disnickyX

Tori and Jade don't get along. They're always fighting, even over the smallest of things. But then Tori's ex shows up at Hollywood Arts; and he's dating a girl named Melissa there. Tori tells him that she's dating someone new too. He invites her on a double date and now she's got a problem. She needs a date. Rating may change if I can get the courage to write one of those scenes

18. MINE!: Chapter 18

Author's Note: Lol. You guys are a bunch of pervs. M it is. I'll bump the rating up when that scene comes.

Also, I'm thinking about uploading another Jori story. That way you guys can have something else to read in between your waits for this story. I've got a few ideas, but I'll let you guys vote on a general subject. Like; teen pregnancy, or Jori being step sisters, or a student/teacher story, or whatever else there is. Your pick. And then I'll try to make it into a story that hopefully doesn't suck;)

{~~~JADE~~~}

I hate Alyssa Vaughn. I don't care that Tori tells me hate is a "strong word" and that I shouldn't hate anyone. I. Hate. Alyssa. Fu-

Language, Jade.

Fine. Freaking. I hate Alyssa freakin' Vaughn.

I hate the way she looks, especially when she's looking at my girlfriend. I hate the way she smiles; especially when she's smiling at my girlfriend. I hate the way she talks; especially when she's talking to, or about, my girlfriend. And I hate the way she thinks; 'cause I know she's thinking about my girlfriend.

"You call your girlfriend by her last name?" She, Alyssa Vaughn, scoffs at me.

"I hate Tori," I shrug.

As of now, it's an automatic response because I don't actually hate Tori as much as I did when she first became my…conscience. But she does have moments when she just gets on my nerves, like now for instance. She's making me be nice. I don't do nice. I don't like nice. Yet here I am, speaking politely to Alyssa Vaughn even though I hate her freakin' guts. And not only that, but she's been on me really bad about my language lately. Which is super annoying, by the way.

I shift a little, trying to get more comfortable. This floor is hard as heck, and Vega's butt bones are stabbing the chiz out of me.

"What's Tori short for? Victoria?" I hear.

I look up and I feel an involuntary twitch develop in my left eye. Alyssa's eyes, the way they're just freakin' smoldering as she gazes at my girlfriend….I expect her to lick her lips at any second.

"Yeah." Vega answers.

Then Alyssa has the nerve to look me straight in the eyes, eyebrows raised in challenge.

Bold gank. I ought to just-

"How could you hate Victoria? It's a beautiful name." She asks, unwittingly cutting into what was going to be a very graphic fantasy about her demise.

I scowl at her. I never said I hated Victoria! But Alyssa misses my scowl because she's doing it again. She's looking at my girlfriend all smolderingly seductive like, and I don't like that sh-

Language, Jade!

Really, Tori? Fine. I don't like that chiz. Happy now?

No answer…. Because I'm not all the way fuc- freakin' crazy.

"It suits you well." Alyssa says, and then she does it. She really does lick her bottom lip. Not in an over exaggeratedly obvious way, but I still saw it.

I tighten my hold on my girlfriend, only one thought on my mind other than the obvious urge to kick Alyssa's….butt.

Mine.

Vega is mine. All mine. I don't share. I won't share. Not ever.

And while I'm in this possessive state of mine, Vega tries to get up.

Seriously?

I hold on tighter. Not even on purpose. It's just reflex.

"I gotta wazz." She whimpers.

Oh.

I let go and she all but runs away. Like she couldn't get away from me fast enough.

I shake my head at myself. What's with the paranoia? Vega always has to wazz. I know that. She's got a bladder the size of a peanut. This is nothing new.

But when she comes out of the bathroom, she sits on the couch. Not back in my lap.

She's not technically any closer to Alyssa than she was before, but she did just distance herself from me. Significantly. I mean, even her seat of choice…she's sitting in between Redhead and André, no room for me to squeeze in. And you can bet Alyssa freakin' Vaughn has noticed.

That gank is not just a noticer either. She's a gloater too, because she actually has the nerve to shoot me a smirk.

I swear I could just kill her. But I aim my murderous gaze at my girlfriend, because she's the one who gave Alyssa something to gloat about.

"What?" Vega mouths at me.

"Get. Back. Down. Here." I snarl, as politely as I can.

"But I can't concentrate when I'm sitting in your lap." She whines.

"I don't care!" I snap back.

"But we have to write this song." She tries some more.

It's obvious to me that she's not gonna do what I say. And I don't have the patience to argue with her about this all day. I want her by me! There's no arguing or compromising to be had about it!

I get up, ignoring everyone but my girlfriend.

When I'm in front of her, she doesn't move. Just pouts a little. And I get a little bit angrier. Maybe not angrier, but more annoyed because you can't really be angry at a pouting Vega. They're kinda cute.

She sighs before giving me her wrist

I yank her up, sit down in her spot, and then pull her down onto my lap. My hands automatically wrapping around her waist.

Mine.

I glance at Alyssa Vaughn and she's staring at us, a horrified look on her face…Like I'm some kind of monster who just came out of the closet, dragged a toddler out of her bed, and ate her; or something.

"What are you looking at?" I growl at her, because I swear I know what she's thinking. She's thinking Vega's in an abusive relationship. She's thinking no one will help her. And she's thinking she can be my girlfriend's knight in freakin' shining armor.

I don't think so.

"You two have the most…interesting relationship." She says bravely.

And that would be her addressing the "abuse."

Strike one.

"Mind your business." I warn her.

"Your business shouldn't be out here for everyone else to mind." She retorts.

And that would be her trying to show Vega there is someone who cares enough to help her.

Strike two.

Then she's looking at me. "Tori, you don't have to put up with that kind of abuse. I'm sure there are plenty of other girls around." She advises.

And that was her trying to come to my girlfriend's rescue…in my face.

Strike three.

"That's it!" I yell. I don't care what Tori says, I'm gonna kill this gank!

I reach down, trying to get my scissors out of my pants, but my girlfriend knows me so freakin' well. She grabs my wrist, pressing it against my hip.

I can't say that I'm surprised Vega wants to stop me from stabbing her house guest. I can't even say that I'm annoyed at her for it either. I'm feeling more or less…good. I like the fact that my girlfriend knows me well enough to predict me. I mean, she was shifting into position before I knew I was gonna go for my scissors. That's gotta mean something for our relationship.

But as I'm me, and she's Vega, we gotta fight over this.

It's got nothing to do with the attempt to stab Alyssa Vaughn any longer. It's everything to do with the fact that nobody tells Jade West what to do. Not even nonverbally. I can't let her get away with this in front of all of our, well her, friends. They'd never respect me.

And Vega….well, she never backs down from a fight with me. So we go at it.

I snatch my hand out of her grasp while simultaneously reaching for my scissors with my other hand. Naturally, my klutz of a girlfriend loses her balance and lands face first into Redhead's lap with an audible "umph." Funny thing, Melissa just raises her phone higher, and then scoots over when Vega picks her face up off of her friend's thighs.

I smile, always loving it when I have the upper hand.

My girlfriend doesn't like that. She yanks me down, using all of her body weight to lift herself up at the same time. I'm fully prepared to apologize to André for kicking his laptop, because I lose my balance and my leg flies up, but my foot connects with absolutely nothing.

André's moved his computer.

I register his expression hasn't changed ever since Alyssa Vaughn walked in. That'd be funny if it wasn't so freakin' annoying.

With Vega's help, I pull myself up, nearly thanking my girlfriend for righting me as well, until I notice our position. She's pinning me down, using everything she's got. She's squeezing my thighs shut with her own. She's got my hands pressed facedown onto the seat. And she even has the nerve to press her chest against mine in an attempt to hold me in place.

Really?

One good hard jerk and I ought to be free 'cause I'm stronger than Vega.

But before I can dish out that "one good hard jerk," she bites me. Right on my chin.

Now I know I like the biting thing sometimes, but I gotta be in the mood for it. And I'm not in the mood for it right now.

"Shit, Vega!" I scream.

"Language!" she and Tori Hiss back at me. You'd think they'd cut me some freakin' slack. My language has been pretty clean all freakin day.

She bites me again, a little higher up this time.

What the heck!

"Vega…" I growl.

"Stay still…" she says, using the same warning tone as me.

God, she's so hot when she makes that face.

No, no, no! I'm not gonna get turned on. Not right here in front of everybody and Alyssa stupid Vaughn!

But then she bites my lips, which hurt, but doesn't really hurt, and that hurt goes away as soon as she gives me those raised eyebrows and set jaw.

I swear I'm the luckiest person on earth. Not only is my girlfriend hot, but she's not afraid of me. Not at all.

She even kisses my nose, like I'm some kind of cute little puppy and not a girl who carries scissors in her pants. And since I'm feeling particularly affectionate toward her, I kiss the closest part of her body I can reach in return. The underside of her chin.

She moves her face down lower, kisses my lips. There's no coffee flavored lip gloss, but it tastes just as good. Maybe even better because it's me getting these kisses and not Alyssa Vaughn.

I know she wants some.

But she can't have any because Vega's mine.

I curl my fingers around her waist, pull her closer. I expect her to pull away any second now because of all the other people here, but she doesn't. She reaches down, dips her hand into the waistband of my pants…Whoa daddy, she's not really gonna…not here…in front of everyone!

And she doesn't. Next thing I know, she's got my scissors in her hands.

"Hey!" I scowl, almost playfully. Almost. I'm not too happy about her tricking me, but it was fun work.

I reach for my scissors, but she snatches them back.

"Alyssa's a guest in my house, Mami. You can't cut her." She states matter-of-factly.

"Fine." I roll my eyes and cross my arms over my chest. "But I'm gonna think really hard about it."

And I mean it.

"You can have these back when you show some good behavior." Vega lectures before getting up.

"Where are you goin'?" I groan. I was super comfy. Now I'm cold and feeling a little weightless without her body on mine.

"Upstairs to put these away."

But she doesn't go upstairs right away. She stops right in front of Alyssa Vaughn, and that twitch in my left eye I had earlier? It comes back, full force.

I sit up in my seat, so I can catch every word those two utter to one another.

Vega thanks Alyssa Vaughn for her concern, but also politely lets her know it was unwarranted.

Good girl.

Now it's Alyssa Vaughn's turn to speak.

"I saw that." She nods her head. "You uh…you seemed to be very much in control there." She pants. And I know, I know, she's having a vivid fantasy about my girlfriend topping her.

I'm gonna kill her. I really am. I'm gonna kill her dead.

You can't kill people for wanting to splunk your hot girlfriend, Jade.

Shut up, Tori.

Of course she's right though. I can't kill everyone who wants to sleep with my girlfriend. But I'd settle for just this one person. Just Alyssa Vaughn, because she actually has the nerve to stare at my girlfriend's butt as she's walking away.

"What the hell are you looking at?!" I yell at her.

She smiles back at me. I think she's actually gonna tell me, but she gets cut off by Thing Two. Amber stands in front of me, empty glass in her hand. I know she wants more lemonade.

I could be difficult, but Tori and Vega have also been on me real bad about how I treat the brats…twins.

I grab Amber's wrist and march her toward the kitchen. Then I pour her the stupid lemonade. And after she gets hers, you can bet Thing One comes in and asks for some too.

"Pour it yourself!" I snap before stomping my way out of the kitchen.

Doing group homework on a Saturday morning is torture enough, why'd Vega have to add the bratsitting? And since she wasthe one who invited them, shouldn't she be the one to deal with them as well? Yeah, she should. So she needs to get her butt back down here before one of them asks me for something else.

"Vega, what are you doing up there!" I yell after plopping back down on the couch between Redhead and André.

She comes running down shortly afterward, and all I see is legs, legs, and more legs, 'cause she's changed into nighty shorts.

Damn those things are nice.

Irritatingly, I'm not the only one who thinks so. Alyssa stupid Vaughn is also staring at my girlfriend's legs.

"You don't have any longer shorts?" I snap as soon as Vega's butt hits my thighs. At least she didn't try sitting away from me again.

"It's hot." She says slowly, as if I'm a moron.

"I'm not hot." I fire back.

She doesn't say anything to me after that, just asks André how he's coming along on the song; and instead of feeling the victory of winning an argument, I feel more or less like a Cat who gets ignored when she says stupid things.

André frowns and shakes his head. He hasn't been able to come up with anything because he's been too busy staring at Alyssa Vaughn…and there's not even anything special about her! He goes to Hollywood Arts for Pete's sake! There are dozens of girls hotter the Alyssa there. Even freakin' Redhead looks better than her….objectively speaking.

"I got something." Robbie announces suddenly. Then he starts singing as he plays his guitar.

It's fun to run

It's fun to play

It's fun to make things out of clay

It's fun to fill your car with gas

It's fun to breeeeeeaaaak….

Things made of glass

What the fu-

Jade!

Fine, what the fudge-monkey? I think to myself as Robbie continues to sing.

A broken glass can cut your hand

And then you'll bleed across the land-

"NO!" I scream loudly, sending a fierce glare Robbie's way.

"I got something," André announces.

I turn my glare on him. It better be freakin' good.

"It says here that the top ten most popular children songs are about food." He explains.

My glare melts away. At least someone is on track. The sooner we write this song, the sooner everyone can go home. And that's definitely including Beck and his guest.

Vega gets up from my lap, claiming to need a notebook and pencil. I can't help but feel she's just looking for an excuse to get up because André can easily take notes on his computer. I mean, she just has to know that Alyssa Vaughn is watching her walk around in those long-legs-exposing nighty shorts; and maybe there's a small part of her that's enjoying it.

She sits back down in my lap, notebook in hand and I can't help it. I wrap my arms around her middle and hold tight.

Mine.

Vega squirms a little and tries to loosen my grip, but I squeeze tighter.

Mine.

She finally gets the hint a few seconds later and starts scribbling in her notebook.

Then she's getting up again.

Seriously?

"Stop getting up! It's annoying." I yell at her.

"I forgot my glasses."

"I'll get them." Redhead rolls her eyes. But she says that at the same time that I yell, "You don't wear glasses!" at Vega.

So… that must man Vega really does wear glasses, right? If Redhead was about to go get them.

I scowl at Redhead. This is the third time something like this has happened to me today. And quite frankly, it's wazzing me off.

The first time was outside, when me and Vega first got here.

I didn't notice that my girlfriend had hurt herself.

But Melissa did.

I'd been with her all morning, and I didn't see those Invader Zim band aids on her wrists. Yet, Redhead was with her for less than a minute and she spotted the very conspicuous black and green discolorations against my girlfriend's tanned skin.

The other thing I didn't know about my girlfriend? She wants, or used to want, to be a school teacher.

A schoolteacher! Not a famous singer or movie star like a normal human being. A school teacher. Even André didn't know that and he's her best friend. But apparently Melissa's closer 'cause Redhead knew about the teacher thing too.

But glasses? I should've known my girlfriend wears glasses. I should've known before Redhead did.

Speaking of Redhead, she quickly makes her way upstairs. Because not only does she know Vega wears glasses, but she knows where my girlfriend keeps them too.

"You didn't know you're girlfriend wears glasses?" Alyssa airs the obvious, giving me a triumphant look. If she thinks she's got a chance with my girlfriend…

I squeeze Vega a little more closer to me. Mine. I don't care if I don't know what color her freakin' hair is. She's still freakin' mine!

"They're for reading." Vega speaks up. "We don't usually do a lot of reading when we're together."

Nice cover, but it's not good enough. It's nowhere near good enough. I angle my head so that I can see Vega's. I'm ready to pounce on her, but not here. I'll take her upstairs first.

That's when I notice her ears. Bright red. They get like that when she's embarrassed.

She shouldn't be. I should be the embarrassed one. I'm the one who doesn't seem to anything about my girlfriend.

I angle my head a little more, see her face.

Her eyes are fixated on Beck's for the briefest second before she's looking down. There's this look on her face, not exactly "the look." But it's close. There's no shame and hurt, just this devastatingly deep sadness.

I've seen that look on Joy a few times, usually around that time of the year. But what could possibly make my girlfriend look like that? What could make her that sad?

Immediately, any irritation or anger I was feeling toward her vanishes, and this need to protect her, make her happy, arises within me. But in order to do that, I'd have to know what's wrong with her first. Instinct tells me I won't be able to get it out of her. Not immediately right now. She shuts down when I ask her about things like that. I've been trying not to push, give her space and all that jazz, but it's been getting more difficult lately.

I look up at Beck, because that's who she was looking at before she got that look on her face, and the wazzbag is smiling! Not out right, but I know when Beck's satisfied.

I knew Vega was lying to me earlier. I did. I saw the two of them talking in the kitchen and I didn't like that chiz, but then he said something to her and she got "the look." I was ready to strangle him, but Tori calmed me down. She told me that I didn't know what was going on and that I should ask. So I did. I was as polite as I could be, but my girlfriend was lying to me and I knew it. I was gonna deal with it later, when there were no guests and witnesses around, but I can't wait any longer. I'm not gonna let him get away with this chiz. Not in my face. Not behind my back either, but definitely not right under my freakin nose!

I give Vega a little squeeze around the waist and kiss the side of her head gently. Then I let go. I get up, look my ex straight in the eyes and say, "Beck, can I see you for a second?" as calmly as I can.

"Me?" He points to his chest.

Seriously?

"You're the only freakin' Beck here!" I snap, because really, he's probably the only Beck in all of L.A.

I stomp my way toward the front door, and I don't even check to make sure he's following me outside.

I know he will.

And he does.

I yank him out of the doorway and slam the front door shut before pushing him up against it.

"Ow, Jade!" He gasps.

"What'd you say to her?" I cut in. I couldn't care less if I've given his big head a concussion.

"What are you talking about?" He whines a little as he rubs the back of his head. I get the feeling he's seeing stars, but if he doesn't talk soon he's just gonna be seeing a whole lotta black.

"Other than the pink Lemonade joke, what did you say to my girlfriend?" I hiss, giving him more details so that he can hurry up and give me an answer.

He frowns at me, like he still doesn't know what I'm talking about. But I know he does. I'm the better actor of us two.

"Beck." I say steely. I'm definitely losing my patience.

He straightens up, but doesn't say anything. He looks more or less like he's weighing options.

Doesn't he know he's got only one option? And that's to tell me what I want to know.

I let go of him, cross my arms over my chest, and I speak slowly. Clearly. "Vega is my girlfriend. You're my ex-boyfriend. I understand if you can't deal. Rationally, I understand that. But hurting her with your stupid mind games is gonna make me retaliate very irrationally toward you."

He gapes at me. "My mind games? What about yours?"

"What are you talking about?" I ask impatiently.

"This whole making her date you thing"-

"You seriously still think I'm dating her to make you jealous?" I scoff incredulously. Although in the back of my mind, I vaguely remember that being the plan once upon a time. "It's been months!" I continue. "You honestly think I would pretend to date someone that long because of you? You think you're that special?"

He blinks at me, at a loss for words.

Oh no you don't, Beck. There are some words I need you to find. Pronto.

I take a step toward him, my hands still crossed over my chest because if I let them down, I will throttle him mercilessly.

"What. Did. You. Say. To. Her?" I demand.

"I don't remember everything." He confesses. And instead of being happy about finally getting somewhere, I lose a little more of my patience.

"Try really freakin hard, dude!" I growl, pointing my finger in his face.

"Alright," he relents, sidestepping me so that he's no longer cornered in front of the door.

I move around so that we're facing each other once again, but I keep my distance. The urge to strangle him is still there.

"I told her that I still love you." He says.

I raise my eyebrow, waiting for the rest because that can't possibly be all he said…but he doesn't continue.

"What else?" I prompt impatiently.

His mouth drops open, like the fact that he still loves me was supposed to distract me.

It didn't. I'm only interested in hearing one thing. Whatever he said to give my girlfriend the look.

"What else?" I repeat.

He sighs deeply, a hint of sadness sweeping over his features. It's got nothing on the sadness I saw on my girlfriend's face.

"I told her that I still want to be her friend." He continues.

"You're paraphrasing." I cut in.

He scratches his head.

"I want to know what you said to my girlfriend. Verbatim."

"Jade, I told you. I don't remember every"-

I freakin' snap. I lounge at him. He falls to the ground and I don't hesitate to pin him down using my own body. I sit on his chest, and for the first time in my life I wish I weighed a ton so I could cut off all his air supply. But I don't, so I make do with what I have. I pin his arms to the side with my thighs and I've got both hands at his throat, ready to asphyxiate the hell out of him.

Jade…

"Not now, Tori," I mumble…aloud.

Beck's eyes are bugging out of his socket, but I seriously don't care. I lean down so he can hear every word I have to say.

"I'm getting really angry." I start off slowly, but that pace doesn't last long because I just keep picturing that freakin look on my girlfriend's face and the fact that he put it there. "I'm trying my best not to really hurt you, but there's only so much good influence Tori has on me, you know? And I'm trying. I'm trying really hard to listen to her because she's telling me I'm going too far and that my hold on your throat is way too tight, but I'm new at listening to my conscience, okay. I'm really fu- freaking new at it! So, tell me what you said to my girlfriend or I'll Squeeze the life out of you, and when you're slipping into unconsciousness, I'll use my scissors on you until you're wide awake, and then we'll start over, and do it all over again until you either tell me what I wanna know or you're freakin dead, Beck!"

"Tori took your scissors," He gasps, eyes wide and wet. I think he's in shock.

I'm not.

"You don't think I have a spare?!" I retort.

I actually don't, but I'll start carrying one around from now on.

"Okay, Okay! I…I told her all you guys do is fight and make out. That when you get bored with that"-

"That what?"

"I just told her that I hope we can still be friends if me and you gave it another try."

Ballsy mother-

Jade…

Arrogant little prick.

"Is that it?" I demand.

He nods his head vigorously. I know he's telling the truth.

I let him up, and I think about his words some more, about how they could make the look appear on my girlfriend's face.

It takes me a while to get it, but I realize Vega could've thought Beck was calling her disposable, like trash, and in that way she could take what he said to mean she was a slut. But at the same time, I know Beck didn't mean it like that. He's just a guy who doesn't know the right thing to say to a sensitive girl. But, she's my girl, so he better learn quickly.

"Apologize to her. And don't say any sh- stuff like that about her, or to her, again." I say, giving him a shove toward the door.

He turns around, faces me with the most sincere apologetic look on his face. "Jade, I'm sor-"

"Not to me." I stop him and push him toward the door again. "Apologize to her."

He sighs, but goes back inside.

"I just have to have these." I hear as soon as I get into the house. "Hopefully my assistant can find a pair just like these, nonprescription of course."

That is most definitely Alyssa Vaughn's annoying voice, and I nearly ignore her but I don't. I look at her, and she's taking a picture of my girlfriend with her phone.

I seriously hate this girl.

I pull Beck back outside and slam the door shut, loudly.

"What?" Beck asks. I see a small spark of hope in his face, and I don't know, or care why it's there.

"Tell your girlfriend to stop flirting with mine before I kill her."

He deflates a little. "She's not my girlfriend."

"I don't care. Tell her anyway." I snap. Then I go back inside the house.

Vega's gone.

So is Alyssa Vaughn.

I swear to God…

"Where's Vega?" I growl at the first person my eyes land on, which happens to be Thing Two.

"In the garage with-"

I don't stay to hear who. Because I'm pretty sure I already know who.

But I'm wrong. I go to the garage and hear two voices. One belonging to Vega, the other is most definitely Redhead's. I could've sworn it'd be Alyssa Vaughn.

"What about this game?" Redhead says.

"Could you really see Ian playing that?" Vega answers.

"I don't care, no one invited him."

Vega chuckles.

I roll my eyes. Enough of this bonding chiz.

I have my hand on the knob and I'm twisting when I hear, "So Tori…"

I stop. Redhead hardly ever calls Vega that. And the way she started off that sentence and left it hanging….I just know they're about to talk about some serious chiz.

I press my ear to the door without even thinking about it.

Yeah, I'm spying on my girlfriend.

"Did I get him?" Redhead says.

"Get who?"

I'm with Vega. Get who?

"You know, last night." Redhead elaborates. At least, I think that was supposed to be some kind of elaboration 'cause I got nothing out of that either. I mean, I don't know what happened last night, other than the fact that my girlfriend went to Ryder's party.

There's a long pause, and I start to think maybe Redhead didn't elaborate enough, not even for Vega; but then my girlfriend shrieks, "Wait a minute, you chucked on him on purpose!"

I frown. Apparently Redhead threw up on someone…on purpose.

Gross.

"Hell yeah, I chucked on him on purpose. He was disgusting. I wanted him to look the part."

"Lissa…" Vega cuts in, using her warning voice.

"What? I wasn't in any state to fight him. I did the best I could."

Fight? Him? Redhead wanted to fight a dude? Why? And who?

"Lissa, even sober you wouldn't have been in any condition to go up against him. But thank you." Vega says.

Wait, what the hell happened?

"What about this game?" Vega asks, and it's clear to me that she's changing the subject.

I nearly bust in there and start demanding an explanation, but Redhead's soft voice stops me.

"You don't want to talk about last night, do you Tori?" she asks. She's being all gentle and understanding….with my girlfriend. And my girlfriend's responding.

I can never get an answer out of her; but Melissa can.

I hear a soft "no" from Vega and I press my ear even closer.

Why doesn't she ever talk to me?

"Did you tell anyone?" Redhead presses.

"My Papi."

"What about Jade?"

Although I can't get any closer to the door without going through it, I try anyway. I really wanna hear her answer. I wanna know why she didn't tell me about last night. Hell, I'll even settle for knowing what happened last night.

"Why did you break up with him, with Danny?" Vega changes the subject again instead of answering. "It wasn't because I told you he cheated on me, was it?"

I hear Redhead sigh heavily. "Not at first."

"Not at first?"

"No. I told him what you said, and he said I couldn't take your word for it because you're….you…uh, I just knew the things he was saying about you weren't true." She finishes.

What the hell? What things?

"What things?" Vega echoes my thoughts.

"I think you know what things." Redhead answers softly.

Vega doesn't say anything. She does indeed know what things, so she doesn't press anymore. Instead, she asks, "Did he say the same things about you? Is that why you wanted to confront him at the party?"

So…Wazzbag was at the party? What the hell was he doing at Ryder's party?

"It was stupid, wasn't it?" I hear Redhead sigh.

"No, not that stupid."

I feel like they're gonna hug this out, and I've had enough, so I open the door and walk in.

They're sitting down on the ground, facing each other and there's a smile on both their faces.

Ugh.

Redhead turns and sees me first. She gives me a small smile before digging through the box between her and Vega.

I look at Vega. She's looking back at me, but she looks so sad. Those big brown eyes have gotten even bigger, like bigger than Puss in Boots's. And I just wanna give her something, make her smile. I'll do anything.

"I got it!" Redhead shouts abruptly, holding up a pack of Phase Ten cards.

"This'll keep them busy." She winks at Vega before getting up and heading for the door.

I let her pass, expecting Vega to get up and try to rush pass me too. But she doesn't move. She stays right where she is, staring unseeingly into the box of games in front of her.

I close the door behind Redhead and take a few steps toward Vega.

She doesn't look up at me.

So I do what I always do when she's ignoring me. I straddle her.

She ignores me still, opting to stare down at our laps.

I tap her chin. She knows what that means. She knows I want her to look up at me, but she doesn't seem very inclined to do it. And I can't bring myself to force her.

"I was looking for you." I sigh.

"You found me." She answers quietly. Then she starts twisting her fingers about each other.

God, I haven't seen her do that in so long. Not since her first couple of days at Hollywood Arts; a time when she'd been so nervous and unsure of herself.

What the hell is wrong with my girlfriend? What's making her so nervous and insecure?

I place a hand on top of hers as an attempt to try and calm her down.

She stops with the twisting fingers thing, but she still doesn't look up at me.

"You okay?" I ask.

She takes a deep breath and finally, finally, looks up at me. "Are you gonna break up with me now?"

"Not today." I joke.

Okay, maybe that wasn't that funny, but she's so sad, and it's seriously freaking me out, and I just want to lighten the mood. But I don't really know how. I don't know how to make my girlfriend happy. I can't even get her to talk to me!

"Tori!" One of the brats yells.

I grit my teeth. I can never get a minute alone with her either! I swear, it's driving me up the wall!

Vega shifts a little, wanting me off her lap so she can go to the aid of whichever brat just called her.

I don't move. "We're going out on a date." I blurt out. I hadn't even thought about it, but I realize it's what I, we, need. We need time alone together. No brats, no Andrés, no Cats, no Redheads, no nobodys. Just me and Vega.

Vega blinks at me. "When?"

I smile at her. At least she sounds interested. At least she's not trying to buck me off of her lap so she can get to the girls.

"How about Saturday?" I ask. That would be perfect. I'd have all day to get to know my girlfriend.

"We can't."

"What?" I frown. "Why not."

"Bradley's birthday party."

"Who?"

"You're uncle."

Oh. That little twerp, Joy's brother.

"He's not my uncle!" I hiss.

"Tori!" One of the brats yells again. I bet it's Riley.

Vega smiles at me. It's a sad smile. "Nice try, Mami." She says before kissing my cheek and trying to get up.

Again, I refuse to move. Nice try my a-butt. If Jade West wants a date with her girlfriend, she's gets a date with her freaking girlfriend!

"How about Friday?" I press.

"I can't." Vega shakes her head. "I have a date with"-

Before she can finish that sentence I grab her face with both hands. "We're exclusive!" I spit.

"Ow, Jade." She grabs the back of my hands with hers. "My dad. I have a date with my dad and I can't cancel because we already moved it from Saturday so I could go to that birthday party with you."

"Oh." I let go. Of course Vega has dinner dates with her father. They're the kind of family that does that. I've seen it. Well, Mama Vega is a little less attentive to her daughters, but Papa Vega is all about his baby girls. Especially his youngest. I should count myself lucky that he was willing to let me have his date night with her. But I can't because I can't seem to get a date night of my own with her.

"What about Thursday?" I try.

"Twins' day."

I'm not even gonna ask.

"Wednesday?"

She shakes her head. "Chemistry lab at 5:00."

"Tuesday?"

She shakes her head. "Group project for script writing."

"Right, the extra credit thing." I nod. "Monday?"

She shakes her head…again.

"Oh come on, what could you possibly have planned for Monday?"

"Henry's birthday party." She laughs. And with good reason. It's the reason we're here in the first place, because we gotta write that stupid song for that stupid kid.

"And we have to rehearse all day tomorrow for that performance," she tells me before I can ask her to out on a date with me tomorrow.

"Tor-iiiiiii!" The brat screams again.

Ugh. Why is murder illegal? Why, why, why?

Vega makes to get up.

I still refuse to move. I'm not ready to let go yet.

"What about now?" I try.

"Now?" She frowns.

"Yeah, now." I say.

"It's like ten in the morn"-

"Go get dressed." I cut her off. I'm not taking no for an answer. I stand up, then I pull her up by the arm.

"But Riley"-

"I'll handle that." I cut her off again. "Go get dressed." I even smack her butt.

"Ok." She grins. Actually grins. Finally! I've managed to make her smile.

She runs out of the garage and straight into Redhead's arms. "I'm going out on a date. Come dress me." She says excitedly

Now, Vega's always telling me that she and Redhead are just friends, but seriously?

"Babe…"

"You can change in Trina's room, Jade!" she calls absently, grabbing Redhead's hand and tugging on her.

"Vega!" I yell.

She looks back at me and frowns.

"You can dress yourself!" I bark.

Redhead snorts.

I seriously wanna throw a pair of scissors at her.

Then she has the nerve to come back and stand in front of me, a huge smirk on her face.

"Relax, Jade. Icky just wants to dress up special for you. That's why she asked me to help."

I swear to God if she puts her hand on my shoulder in a reassuring manner, I'll break it.

Jade…

Shut up, Tori.

"You're in for a real treat." Redhead winks at me conspiringly.

I still wanna throw a pair of scissors at her, but I let 'em go. Vega looks back at me a few times, but otherwise lets Redhead usher her up the stairs.

"So…you guys are leaving, huh?"

I turn and face Beck. I seriously don't want to talk to him, but he's in a bit of a subdued state. I'm guessing he's still recuperating from our little "chat" outside.

"What?" I huff.

"You two are just gonna leave your….your girl"- he shakes his head. "You're just gonna leave Tori's house filled with her friends as well as your sisters behind." He says. Obviously he still can't admit the fact that Vega's my girlfriend. But he's also got a point.

"André!" I yell. And when he's in my sights I say, "Me and Vega are going out. You're bratsitting. I don't care where you go, but you've got to clear outta here for a few hours."

"Uh, no I'm not."

"I'll give you 20 dollars a head. Plus an extra twenty if you finish the song by the time we get back to you guys."

"Deal."

I pull out fifty.

"I feel like you insulted my math skills." He deadpans.

I roll my eyes. "Half now, and half when I come collect a kiddie song, three breathing children, and a Cat." I say as I point to where the brats are right now.

Redhead's brother kicks Riley.

Riley pushes him down.

And Amber spills her drink on a Cat who is investigating an electric socket with her hair.

I look back at André with a raised eyebrow.

"Deal." He agrees before snatching the money from my hand and pocketing it.

While I'm waiting for Vega to come downstairs, I find Alyssa Vaughn and send glares and glares at her. When that doesn't seem to intimidate her, I smile. I smile because I'm thinking of different ways to hurt this girl, different places to hide her body, or body parts, when I'm through, and the thoughts send tingles up and down my spine.

Alyssa Vaughn smiles back at me for a little while, 'til she gets creeped out. Then she starts helping Beck…with nothing.

When my girlfriend finally comes back upstairs, my first impulse is to take her back upstairs, push her down on her bed, and- crap! I'm drooling. Literally. I wipe at my chin.

God, it's not even like she's wearing anything fancy. Jean shorts and a plain white cami. It's a regular outfit, but you don't notice that at first. First thing you notice….legs. Long, uncovered legs. They look endless… not only because of the shorts, but her shoes. I bet they came from Trina's closet. The heels are higher than I've ever seen Vega wear, and they're all sparkling and silver and strappy.

Strappy?

Whatever. Moving on to Vega's makeup... It's like this totally exotic work of art, all earth toned browns and beiges with the smallest bit of silver along her eyelids. And then there's the way her hair's swept up into a high ponytail that I just wanna yank on while I-

Crap. Drooling again. And freakin Redhead saw. She smirks at me, proud of her handy work.

She should be. But I scowl nastily at her anyway.

"You're welcome." She mouths. And I just wanna slap that stupid smug grin off her face….after I splunk my girlfriend.

"Where are you going?" Thing One suddenly appears out of freakin nowhere.

"On a date with your sister," Vega smiles.

She's got the most beautiful smile. Fudge-monkey! Am I seriously freakin' drooling again?

"I wanna go!" Riley pipes up.

Crap, I forgot about this! I should've snuck Vega out the back or something. Anytime we're about to go somewhere, all a brat has to do is claim it wants to go too and Vega lets it come.

"Not this time, Monstrito." My girlfriend says.

Wait, what?

"What?" Riley scowls.

"Lissa's gonna take you guys to the movies." Vega says firmly.

"I don't want to go to the stupid movies." The brat stomps her foot like the little pre-terd that she is.

"Fine, Melissa can take you home and then take Amber and Ian to the movies." Vega straightens up and folds her arms across her chest.

Day-um.

Riley scowls at Vega, then at me.

I grin at her.

"Fine. I'll go to the stupid movies." She concedes.

Vega barely acknowledges her. She ushers everyone out of the house. I'm not surprised when freakin Alyssa Vaughn hovers around the door as Vega's locking up. But it's still irritating as hell.

Vega doesn't notice. She calls Thing Two to her and moves the kid a little off to the side. If she's hoping for privacy, she didn't go far enough to get it.

"Amber," she starts off, both hands on the brat's shoulders. "You know how Riley is, and you've seen how Ian is…"

Amber nods her head, so Vega continues.

"I'm gonna need you to be super good, okay? So my friend will have one less problem to worry about. Can you do that for me, Mamita?"

"Yes."

"I can be good too." Riley interjects.

"Of course you can." Vega answers Riley absently. Her sights are still set on Amber, and she continues to talk to her. "Lissa's gonna need all the help from you that she can get. I'm counting on you to help her out, Mamita. You understand how big this responsibility is, right?"

Amber squares her shoulders and nods her head. She's so ready to take on this mission.

"I can be good, Tori!" Riley insists.

Vega all but waves her away.

"You're the most mature, so I know you can do it." She continues, staring Amber straight in the eyes. "It's probably because you're the oldest."-

"But I'm the oldest!" Riley cuts in.

"Is she?" Vega asks Amber.

Riley doesn't wait for her sister. "I am!" she insists.

Vega finally turns to Riley, giving her a thoughtful look. "Are you sure? You don't act very much like the oldest."

Riley's jaw drops.

I can hardly contain my laugh, but I do it to my best ability because I don't want to undo all of Vega's hard work.

"It doesn't matter." Vega shrugs after a while, turning back to Amber. "I'm gonna need you to be the responsible one because we know Riley can't be."

"I can!" Riley screams. "I can be good, and responsible, and all that other junk! Just watch!"

"We'll see." Vega says absently before giving both brats a quick squeeze.

So, reverse psychology still works on Thing One? God my girlfriend's a freakin' genius.

I'm still smiling my butt off, until Alyssa Vaughn tells my girlfriend she'll be a great mother one day.

It's not the comment in itself that makes me mad, because I'd have to be blind to not see that my girlfriend's good with brats. It was the way Alyssa Vaughn said it, like she was looking at a potential partner to raise her many kids with.

I grab Vega's hand and march her toward my car.

Mine. Vega is mine.

"Jade…." She huffs at the passenger door.

"What?" I snap. If she tells me to be nice to that gank, I swear…

"You didn't say bye to the girls."

Oh. That.

"I'll see them soon enough." I shrug before making my way around to the driver's side.

I get the feeling Vega didn't like my answer. She's pretty quiet for a while, opting to stare out the window for the first couple of minutes of the ride.

I groan before pulling out my phone and dialing Thing Two. She answers almost immediately with a tentative, "Jade?"

"I forgot to say bye." I say briskly.

"What?"

"Before me and Vega left. I forgot to say bye, so I'm saying it now." I elaborate impatiently.

"Um, okay. Bye Jade."

"Put Riley on the phone."

I hear the phone switch over and then a less than energetic, "What?" from Thing One.

"Bye." I say.

"Bye." She answers before hanging up.

I put my phone down with a huge frown. I'm so disappointed in myself. I can't believe I let Vega guilt trip me. But then I peek at her, and she's unsuccessfully trying to hide a smile. And since I can admit that I like it better when she's happy, I can also admit that my frown disappears when I see her smile.

Suddenly, Vega frowns. Just out of freakin' nowhere.

What the chiz…

"Jade?" Her frown deepens.

"Yeah?"

"Where are we going?"

"My place." I answer, before resting a hand on her knee comfortingly.

"Your place? I thought we were going out?" She continues to frown.

"You think I'm gonna take you out looking like that?" I scoff. Plus it's ten in the morning. Where else would we go to have a date?

"What's wrong with the way I look?" She asks, her voice getting quieter. More sensitive. And I know I have to be careful with my answer. If I say the wrong thing, she's gonna think that I think she looks like a slut.

And I really, really, don't. I think she looks good enough to eat.

"There's nothing wrong with the way you look." I start off. "But I've shared my girlfriend enough for today. I want to spend some time alone together, just me and you. Wouldn't you like that?" I squeeze her knee a little, and wait for her answer.

She looks thoughtful for a moment or two before nodding her head in affirmation.

I turn my attention back to driving, but I keep my hand on her knee, kneading it gently. But it's really more of a possessive gesture rather than a comforting one.

"Um, Jade?"

"Yeah, Babe?" I answer distractedly.

"Hypothetically speaking…"

"Yeah?"

"If we ever broke up."-

"We're not breaking up!" I glare her way, though my eyes should really, really, be on the road.

"Hypothetically speaking, Jade!" She insists.

I swear I don't want to hear where this is going, but I tell her to proceed anyway.

"Would you…" she pauses there.

"Would I what?"

"Would you want to be friends afterward?"

I frown. Where the heck did that come from? And more importantly, what kind of answer is she looking for? I could go insane trying to figure it out. I know I could. So, I opt for honesty.

"Hypothetically speaking?" I ask again, just to be on the safe side.

"Yeah."

"No." I answer.

"What?"

"I wouldn't want to be your friend." I clarify. It just wouldn't sit right with me. If we ever split up, I don't think I'd be able to watch her move on from me, or be happy without me, or any of that other chiz. And being her friend would mean I'd have to do all of that with a freakin smile on my face while pretending to be happy for her. So no, I wouldn't want to be her friend.

"Not ever?" she persists.

"Nope."

"Oh."

It's such a sad, defeated little "oh." And it makes me feel like I failed some kind of test.

"Why?" I ask.

"Nothing." She shrugs.

"Vega…"

"Just something Beck said," she shrugs again.

I breathe a sigh of relief 'cause I get it now. Beck scared her with that talk in the kitchen earlier. She thinks he's got a chance with me and that I'll leave her out in the cold.

I raise my hand from her knee and grab her hand. "Babe, don't worry about him. We're not breaking up, okay."

"Okay." She says, giving me a small smile before looking out the window again.

I bring her hand up to my lips and kiss the back of it. And I continue to hold that hand until I get home.

Joy's coming out as we pull up.

Just great.

I try my best to rush by her, but of course she wants to speak.

"Hi girls. Where are the girls?"

I roll my eyes. "The movies."

"By themselves!" she spazzes.

"Of course not!" I scoff.

"They're with Melissa." Vega answers for me.

"Oh, she's a sweetheart." Joy answers, immediately calming down. "Make sure you girls lock up behind me."

I freeze. "Wait a minute, you know who Melissa is?"

"Tori's friend, pretty redhead, right?" she answers.

Vega nods her head.

"I've bumped into them a few times around town," Joy explains. "Such a sweetheart." She repeats before leaving me alone with my girlfriend.

I grab Vega's hand and drag her upstairs to my room.

Mine.

Not freakin' Redhead's. Mine.

But she spends so much time with Melissa, talks to Melissa, has fun with Melissa. It should be me, me, and freakin ME!

I push Vega down on my bed and climb on top. Her squeak of surprise is immediately cut off when I press my lips to hers. She kisses me back and I'm so glad because I need this. I need to have some part of her that she hasn't shared with Redhead yet.

Yet? How about never!

I wedge my knee in between her legs and nudge them apart.

She freaks. Like, she freezes up and her eyes get all huge and she yells, "Wait!" but she doesn't give me any time to respond. She pushes me off of her, says she's gotta wazz, and then she's scrambling out of my bed as fast as she can.

Of course I follow her. Only I can't get to her. She's locked herself in the bathroom.

I press my ear to the door 'cause I thought I heard…

She sniffs quietly and I realize I was right. She's crying.

I screwed up big time. I know my girlfriend doesn't like rough. I wasn't thinking, I was just…I don't know. I just want her.

I raise my hand to the door, about to knock, but my phone rings.

Dammit.

Vega stops sniffling immediately because now she knows I'm out here. She doesn't want me to hear her cry. She doesn't seem to want to do anything in front of me.

I stomp my way to my room and answer the stupid phone. Collar ID says it's André.

"What!" I snap.

"I'm done with the song." He answers. He's pretty used to me snapping at him.

"I don't care!" I yell back.

"Just as long as you know I care about my money." He retorts.

"What money? In fact, you owe me money!"

"What?"

"You don't have the brats. Melissa took them."

"Hey, I still have Cat!"

"You owe me ten dollars." I say. Normally, I'd add an insane amount of interest, but my heart's not in it. Too busy thinking about my girlfriend.

"Alright. We're picking up the costumes now. Tell Tori she's the strawberry sundae, and you're the hamburger." He says.

"I will not be a hamburger!" I growl. Then I hang up on him. He calls back immediately, but I toss my phone onto my bed and head for the bathroom.

My girlfriend's still in there. But she's talking to someone. It could be anyone. Her mom, dad, sister, André, Redhead, anyone; but it doesn't matter. All that matters is that she's not talking to me.

And I'm gonna fix that. Right now, today.

I go back to my room, turn the TV on to the Lifetime movie channel. Vega really likes that, and I really gotta make my room Vega friendly so she can relax.

I change into an old cami and some sweatpants. Then I pull out a T-shirt and some sweats for my girlfriend.

I go downstairs, head straight for the kitchen. Comfort food, talking food. That's what I need.

There's leftover chili. I microwave two bowls of that and grab a can of Pepsi for me before pouring a glass of pink lemonade for her. Joy's had to start buying the stuff because Vega's addicted and she got the twins hooked on it as well.

When I get back to my room, Vega's in there. She's already changed into the outfit I laid out for her. I don't know why I thought I'd have to actually tell her the clothes were for her to change into. Maybe because we don't always seem to be in sync. But there are these little moments when I realize we do seem to understand each other, if only a little.

My phone rings, making Vega jump a little.

I watch her for a bit longer, wondering what she's going to do. I know if it was me in there with Vega's phone, I'd answer it.

She doesn't so much as touch it. "Jade!" she yells. "You're phone!" Then she's going through my sock drawer.

Isn't she the least bit curious as to who's calling her girlfriend? Does she care at all?

I walk in, hands and arms full of drinks and chili. "If it's André, tell him I'm not going to be a freakin' hamburger." I sigh.

Vega looks at me, sees my full hands, and only then does she head for my phone….which is still ringing.

"It's not André." She frowns after reading my phone. "It's Grayson."

"Ignore it." I say quickly. I know she's got to be wondering who the heck Grayson is. There's no one at Hollywood Arts with that name.

But she doesn't even ask. She presses the decline button, and two seconds later my phone's ringing again.

"Grayson again?" I nod toward my phone.

She nods her head.

"He probably won't stop any time soon. Go ahead and turn my phone off."

She opens her mouth, about to ask me something, but then she clamps her mouth shut and turns my phone off.

She doesn't ask. She doesn't ask who Grayson is, why he's calling so much, or why I would rather turn my phone off than talk to him.

If it was the other way around, I would've asked. No, I would've demanded answers.

But Vega's not like you, Jade.

Tori's right, but I still think my girlfriend should show some type of interest.

I hand her drink over, but when she reaches for her bowl of chili, I snatch it back.

"It's hot, Vega!"

Her eyes go wide. "Then why are you holding it!" she spazzes before grabbing a pillow off my bed and sitting down with it in her lap. "Put it down!" she freaks some more.

I put the bowl in her lap and sit down next to her, some of that anger slipping away from me because it's hard to be mad at a Vega when the thought of a bowl of chili burning your hand makes her panic.

"He's my dad." I admit. She looks at me, spoon raised to her mouth and eyebrows raised inquiringly. "Grayson, he's my dad."

"Oh."

"I could tell you wanted to ask."

She gives me a small smile.

"So, why didn't you?" I press.

She shrugs. "I figured you'd tell me if you wanted me to know."

Seriously? That's how she thinks? That we should only tell each other stuff we want the other to know? That I'm supposed to just wait until she trusts me enough to tell me her secrets!

I shovel hot chili into my mouth. I don't care that I've probably done some serious damage to my tongue.

It's not like my girlfriend doesn't talk to anyone. She'll talk to her dad, and she'll talk to Redhead. But she won't talk to me. Why won't she talk to me!

It's not like you talk to her either.

Yes I…Come to think of it, I don't really share a whole lot with Vega. Not much about my personal life. Most things she finds out by Joy or the twins. She didn't even know my father's name, for Pete's sake!

I calm down a little. It's not just me, and it's not just her. It's us. We don't know each other. And it's time we start to get to know one another.

"My favorite color is brown." I say. Random, I know, but I wanna start with the little stuff and work my way up to the big stuff. Baby steps. I know Vega needs baby steps.

"Brown?" She frowns. "Why brown?"

I shrug. "Because nobody's favorite color is brown."

"That's because it's yucky." She shakes her head in amusement.

"Not true." I defend myself. "Some of my favorite things happen to be brown."

"Like what?"

Your eyes.

"Coffee." I say instead.

She rolls her eyes playfully. "I should've seen that coming."

"Yours is yellow, right?" I ask, confident that it is because I already know the answer.

"No, it used to be yellow." She shrugs.

What? You mean to tell me I don't even know her favorite freakin' color! "Since when isn't yellow your favorite color?" I demand.

She frowns at me. "You hate yellow anyway."

"Yeah, but normal people don't just flip flop on their favorite stuff!" I practically scream.

It doesn't faze her one bit. She just shrugs again, like it's no big freakin' deal. "I found a better color." She has the nerve to say.

"Which is…"

"Blue."

"How unoriginal." I scoff. "Everyone's favorite color is blue."

"It's not just any old blue!" She exclaims defensively.

"Oh? And what's so special about your blue?"

"It's…" She falters. "Never mind."

"Seriously? You can't even tell me that!" I yell, putting my chili aside because I'm no longer hungry.

I know, I know it's stupid to argue about something as stupid as favorite colors; but this is getting freaking ridiculous! How am I supposed to get to know a girl who won't even tell me why she likes the color blue?

"Jade?"

"What?"

"I can…I can tell you, but you have to promise not to laugh at me." She relents.

Seriously? Why would I laugh? But I turn toward her and promise her anyway.

"Pinky promise." She insists.

"Vega…." I groan.

"Just do it." She pleads, giving me that Puss in Boots pout. It's freakin' evil, I tell you. But it gets me.

"Okay." I relent, offering her my pinky.

"You have to say it."

"For the love of Dan! I pinky promise I won't laugh at your special blue, happy?"

"Okay." She accepts, then she's setting her bowl to the side.

All that to tell me why she likes blue?

She reaches both hands up to my face and gently taps the corners of my eyes.

"These." She whispers. "My special blue."

"My eyes?" I blink at her.

She drops her fingers away from my face. "You can laugh." she sighs.

"It's not funny."

"I know," she looks down at her lap. "It's stupid, right?"

"No."

It's anything but stupid. It's one of the very few indications I've gotten that she really does feel something toward me.

I grab her face with both hands and kiss her eyelids. "My favorite brown." I say, just before pressing my lips to hers.

I want to keep going. Keep kissing her until we both end up naked, but I pull back. I don't wanna pull back, but I do.

Slow. My girlfriend needs slow. And I'm too wired up. I'll end up doing something she doesn't like, like before when she ran away to the bathroom. I don't want that to ever happen again. The way she looked at me…she looked so scared. Like maybe…

No. I don't want to even think it….but what if…

I gotta ask her. I know I'm supposed to be starting off slow, like with favorite colors and chiz, but I really gotta know.

"Hey, Vega?"

"Hm?" She asks, not even bothering to turn and look at me. I'm not really that surprised. The Lifetime movie has managed to grab her attention. I'm lucky I even got that "hm" out of her.

Vega looks at me. Probably thinking I'm waiting on her full attention.

I still don't say anything. Problem is, I don't know how to ask. How do you ask your girlfriend if she's ever been raped? You can't just come out and say it. Heck, thinking about it is bad enough. But the thought is driving me crazy and I gotta get it out somehow. I have to know.

I scoot closer to her, take her hand in mine.

"Jade? What's wrong?" she asks.

I clear my throat, still not really sure on how to start. I know Vega's only done it once, and that it was with Wazzbag. At least, that's what she told me. But if she was telling the truth, and she was …forced; then that would mean it was Wazzbag who did it.

And I'll kill him.

"Jade, you're starting to make me nervous," she jokes lightly, squeezing my hand a little

I clear my throat again. "Um, Vega, the time you and Wazzbag,"-

"Who?"

Right. Wazzbag has a name.

"Danny. The time you and Danny um did it, uh did you want to?

She tenses up. "I don't wanna talk about that with you."

"Well who do you want to talk about it with, Melissa?" I shoot back.

"I don't want to talk about it at all!" she snaps.

She goes back to watching TV, dismissing me. She tries to take her hand from mine too, but I don't let go. I scoot even closer to her and wrap my arms around her shoulders. She relaxes almost instantly, even lays her head on my shoulder.

"I don't like talking about it." She whispers. "Please drop it."

But I can't. I gotta know.

"I just wanna know if he…if he forced you to do it." I manage.

She's quiet for a few moments. Then she says, "No."

I think she's lying to me. If she's not, she's definitely not telling the whole truth. And that means I have to figure out the truth on my own.

I kiss her forehead, and then I stay quiet while she watches TV.

Halfway through the movie, I notice she's been still for a long time. She hasn't fallen asleep, but I can tell she's on her way. I also know she won't fall asleep without fingering that little innie of hers.

I sigh and get up, tell her that I'm going downstairs to surf the net because this movie is boring.

She doesn't argue with me. Doesn't ask me to stay with her either. I bet she can't wait for me to leave because she won't molest her belly button in front of me.

I didn't have to lie to my girlfriend about what I was doing downstairs, but if she had cared enough to ask, I would have. I'm going to find out everything I can about whatever my Vega doesn't wanna talk about.

And the first thing I wanna know about? Ryder's party. Something happened there last night and I wanna know what.

Although I doubt there'll be much up on the slap concerning Vega, I check anyway.

It's like freakin' fate because the first thing I see is a picture. It's been shared and commented on so many times I'm surprised I haven't seen sooner. Vega's not the main focus in this picture, but what catches my attention is Redhead, and she's chucking on some guy, just like I overheard her saying in the garage…only the guy she's chucking on isn't Wazzbag. He's…well, I don't know who the fudge-monkey he is. I've never seen him before.

But Redhead has. Redhead chucked on him because he was "disgusting." Redhead chucked on him to come to my girlfriend's aid. And Vega thanked Redhead for that! If I was there, I would've done way more than chucked on that guy for…whatever the heck he did to deserve being chucked on!

I slam my laptop closed and stomp my way up to my room. Fuck going slow with my girlfriend. Fuck her feelings. Fuck-

Jade…

And fuck you, Tori!

Halfway up the steps, I hear a loud thud, and then my girlfriend screams my name.

Remember how I was on my fuck this and that kick concerning Vega? Yeah, that's all forgotten. I run the rest of the way to my room and bust open the door, ready to kick some motherfucker's ass about my girlfriend, but when I get in there, Vega's alone. She's picking herself up off the floor quickly, and I know she's hoping I didn't see her down there so she can pretend like nothing happened.

But I give her the benefit of the doubt. I ask her what's wrong anyway.

"Nothing. I'm fine," she says. She even offers me a small smile, like that's supposed to convince me.

I blow up at her, 'cause I just can't take this shit anymore. "What the fuck, Vega!" I scream and march up to her. She sits down on the bed and stares up at me, clearly shocked. "You're the one who screamed my fucking name; well, here I fucking am, so tell me fucking something!"

"I-I"- she stutters, her face slowly crumbling.

No. No. No. No. Not the face.

I squeeze my eyes shut and pinch the bridge of my nose. This girl is gonna put me in a straightjacket.

"I don't want you to hate me," she whispers so low I nearly don't catch it.

"I'm not gonna hate you," I respond before I can even think it over. Because really, what if what she has to tell me will make me hate her?

"Not even if we break up?" She whimpers.

This shit again? This has got to be the third time she's mentioned something about us breaking up. Is there something I need to know?

But she's making the face at me, so I don't tell her that if she breaks up with me I'll cut her up into bite size pieces and flush her down the toilet. Instead, I say, "I'd never hate you, baby."

"You did before," she insists pathetically.

I move toward her, ready to take her into my arms and do that reassuring shit, but the second I touch her she yelps in pain and I back up real quick.

"I fell out of the bed." She explains, while pointing to a bruise on her arm that I must've bumped up against.

I touch the bruise gently. "I changed my mind." I say. "I'm not getting you band aids with your face on them. I'm putting my face on 'em."

"Your face?" she frowns.

"Yeah, I wanna be the one who fixes you when you're hurt." I respond absentmindedly.

Honestly, I should never be allowed to blurt out things without thinking about it first, 'cause that was the cheesiest thing I've ever said in my life! Fucking Tori's turning me into a sap.

But Vega, my sappy girlfriend, she eats that shit up. The smile she's giving me in return for that idiotic declaration is so big that I kinda don't care about how stupid I just sounded. I probably wouldn't even care if the whole world heard me say it either.

{~~~O~~~}

There's something seriously wrong with my girlfriend. Since Saturday she's been in such a good mood that I kinda want to do something to depress her. Like, if I called her a slut right now, she'd probably laugh at me. That's how happy she's been for the past week.

I'd like to think it was me who made her that happy, but I just don't see how. I only told her I'd never hate her, not even if we broke up. And I gotta be honest, I regret it. Now she probably thinks she can leave me for someone else, like Redhead, and everything would be honky-dory between the two of us.

"Jade, we're here. Get out of the car!" Joy calls loudly.

I start.

Damn. We're here already? That was quick.

Then again, I figured the ride to Joy's parents' home would fly by because I don't want to be here. Why, oh why, did I agree to come to this stupid party?

I sigh deeply and look out at the house. It's the same as it's always been. One story, kinda small, but lots, and lots of land. Only difference is today there are lots and lots of people here. Most of them are hanging around outside because like I said, the house is kinda small.

I get out of the car and follow after Joy, the brats, and my girlfriend. Yeah, she's in front of me, being dragged by thing two. The twins are so excited to be here. They love their grandparents.

Speaking of their grandparents, Joy's mom meets us at the door.

The twins squeal, "Grandma!" and hug the old broad.

She hugs them back briefly, then she speaks. God, I hate it when she speaks.

"What is this?" she frowns.

Joy rolls her eyes at her mother who's just picked at a streak in Amber's hair, dark blue today, exactly like mine.

"I think it's cute Mom, the girls wanna be just like their big sister." Joy winks at me before walking passed her mother and heading for the kitchen. It's always straight for the kitchen whenever we have to visit these people, and I don't blame her. That's where the alcohol is.

If there were some way I could sneak a cup, I'd drink whenever I got here too.

"Come on Tori, come meet my cousins!" Riley says excitedly, pulling my girlfriend by the arm. And I let her go without feeling a thing, not anger, not annoyance, nothing. Because I'm already feeling plenty anxious. I really do hate this place, and these people.

I throw up two fingers, my index and middle. My way of nicely telling my girlfriend bye. I'm going my own way. And I don't feel the slightest bit of guilt for leaving her on her own in a stranger's house. Hell, I'm still practically a stranger in this place.

I head for the kitchen, but more specifically, for Joy. I do it every time. I think it's why she likes to make me come with her to visit her parents; because every time she's able to successfully blackmail me into coming, I stick close to her side. It's like the only time I willingly spend with her.

"So, the girl out there?" I hear her mother say.

"She's my girlfriend." I interrupt, alerting both of them of my presence. I don't know why I offered up that bit of information. I know what kind of people Joy's parents are, but I don't know. It's like, I'm so used to Joy not caring that I'm a lesbi-…that I'm into gir-…that I'm dating Vega, I just forget that there are people who have a problem with it.

"They make the cutest couple. Tori's a sweetheart." Joy cuts in with a smile aimed my way.

I don't return it, but I inch even closer to her.

"Couple? That kind of Girlfriend?" Irene, Joy's mom, gasps.

"Yeah." I answer defiantly. I add a roll of my eyes as well, because really, does she have to be so fucking dramatic.

Irene grabs at her heart like she's about to have a heart attack.

"You okay, mom?" Joy asks, but she doesn't go to her mother. Probably because she knows she's being overdramatic.

"I'm fine, I'm fine it's just…." Irene walks straight up to Joy and grabs both of her hands. "Joy, sweetheart, is that really the example you wanna set for the twins?"

"What do you mean?" Joy asks, shaking loose one hand so she can steal a couple cherry tomatoes. There are lots of things like that on the table. Cherry tomatoes, olives, cheese…Irene's in the middle of making a salad. Who the fuck eats a salad at a birthday party?

Joy offers me a tomato. I hate the things but I take it anyway, if only to have something to do. I practically gag on the juice that squirts into my mouth when I bite into it, but I finish the stupid thing anyway.

"I mean, is that the kind of dating habit you want your girls to pick up." Her mother continues, not to be deterred, this one.

Joy frowns. "What part of Tori's a sweetheart didn't you get?"

"Joy…"

"I mean, you can't get any better, honestly. She doesn't do drugs, she's responsible…"

As Joy lists all the good things about Vega, I try my best to keep a straight face. She has to know that her mother's referring to the fact that me and Vega are both females. She just has to. And the fact that she's teasing her mother like this…

"Joy, Tori is a girl." Irene cuts in.

Again Joy frowns, as if she's truly confused. "Yeah…"

"Jade is…well…"

"Well what?"

"Jade, is of the female persuasion as well."

"Of the female…." Joy looks me up and down. "Well, yeah Mom. I vaguely remember taking her shopping for her first training bra, but thanks for the reminder. I mean, they haven't grown three cup sizes since, so I guess I just forgot." She ends that by popping another cherry tomato into her mouth.

I smirk, but hide it by shoving another one of the nasty little fuckers into my mouth. Full blown sarcasm. From Joy…toward her mother. My life can't get any better right now.

"So you won't mind if the twins decide they want a girlfriend too? That's really what you're telling me." Joy's mother drops all pretenses of being discreet.

"Is that really what you're asking me?" Joy shoots back.

"Joy!"

Joy laughs. "No Mom. It wouldn't bother me if the girls decided they like girls too. In fact, I think Amber has a bit of a crush on Tori, doesn't she honey?"

I scoff. "It's Riley."

"No, I'm fairly certain it's Amber."

She's crazy.

"Riley's the one always touching her and stuff." I remind her.

"She's just teasing to get under your skin. It's Amber who's always blushing."

I shake my head. "Whatever."

"You should take that a bit more serious. There's a big age difference now, but who knows what'll happen in the future.

"Gross." I mutter.

"It's not gross, you're dad's ten years my senior. Tori's nine years older than the twins.

I roll my eyes. "She doesn't have a chance with my girlfriend."

"How are you gonna get grandchildren if your girls are…that way?" Irene cuts in. I glare at her. Does she fucking mind? Me and Joy were actually kinda bonding there!

"Jade still has eggs mom." Joy sighs exasperatedly. "And there's always adoption."

"I wasn't talking about Jade"-

"You better be talking about Jade, because she's the only one of my girls who's remotely old enough to have children. But… wait" Joy turns to me abruptly, totally catching me off guard.

"What?" I scowl.

"You two are waiting to have children right? You're not gonna make me a grandmother any time soon, right?" She pleads.

"Well, we were thinking…,"

"Jade West!" She grabs me by the arms and gives me a little shake. "Tell me you're not thinking about it."

I smirk at her. "No. Not yet."

Joy lets out an obviously fake sigh of relief. "See, Mom? Don't worry, it's all under control." Then she winks at me.

Her mother shakes her head and starts working on her salad again.

I shake my head too. Sometimes I don't exactly know what's going through Joy's head. I know that her mother was referring to the fact that I'm not Joy's daughter. But Joy's always seemingly misunderstanding her mother's meanings, or conveniently cutting into them.

"Jade, honey, help me with this, please."

Normally, I don't like it when Joy tells me what to do, but I don't mind the change of subject. Plus, lately she's been getting on my nerves less and less.

"Take this to Grandpa Bill and Uncle Derek."

These men are neither my grandfather nor my uncle, but Joy insists on referring to her father and brother that way.

I sniff the cups and glare down at the drinks in my hands. Alcohol. It's never good for me when her father gets alcohol in his system. Maybe I can dump it in a plant nearby, or maybe even drink it-

"Don't you dare drink that Jade Mercy West!" Joy scolds me. It's as if she can read my mind and it scared the chiz out of me.

I drop the cup. Good thing it's Styrofoam.

It's not my fault I got startled. Joy never calls me by my middle name. It's been Jade West if she gets pissed enough for the last four years. Ever since…

"Mercy? That's your name?" Joy's mother asks me with a nasty scoff.

She's only known me since I was five, but I'm not surprised she didn't know that. She makes it a point not to acknowledge me more than she has to. I'm not her flesh and blood the way the twins are. It got worse after my father left Joy for Ellen; but Joy's either pretended not to notice, or she genuinely doesn't care.

"Mercy?" Joy repeats, as if she doesn't realize she just said it. And then the tears come.

I just stand still. I don't know what to do. Mercy was her daughter. Joy named her that. I never asked why, but I figured it had something to do with me. I was gonna give the baby my name for a middle name again, like I did with Amber and Riley; and I think Joy thought that if she gave the baby my middle name for a first name it'd stop me from using my first name as her middle name.

It didn't.

The baby was named Mercy Jade. Well, Mercy Jade West. If Joy thought I'd be annoyed by a kid having the same name as me, just flipped around a bit, she was wrong. That made me even happier. Like I was double important. Kids are dumb like that.

"See what you've done!?" Joy's mother yells at me. "Just look at her!" she points to my stepmother. "She's a wreck!"

"Don't yell at her. She didn't mean it." Joy sobs. She's trying so hard to stop crying. Wiping her eyes and nose and I don't even have the heart to even think about how gross she looks. I really do feel bad.

"Sorry." I mumble, not exactly knowing why I'm apologizing, but doing it all the same. Joy's mom gives me a nasty glare that Joy doesn't see because she busies herself by pouring more drinks for her dad and brother.

Then she hands them to me. "Don't drink any of this." She commands, trying her best to be her normal self, but she can't pull it off. There's a definite tremble to her lips and a shake to her hand.

She doesn't even wait for me to nod before she turns away and heads for the hallway. I'm willing to bet anyone a hundred bucks that she's headed for the bathroom so she can have a good cry.

Not wanting to be alone with her mother, I quickly turn on my heels and carry the drinks out to the guys in the dining room. I hand them over without a word. Joy's brother thanks me for his cup, but I ignore him. The way he looks at me gives me the creeps. Joy's dad, Bill, just grunts when he gets his cup from me.

Amber's sitting in his lap, so I try to get her away from him. She doesn't need to be around drunks. Especially not him.

The second I reach for my sister, Bill tightens his hold on her. I know that gesture. He's letting me know she's his. I can't take her.

I can though. Kid loves her grandpa, but I know if I want her, she'll choose me, and I want him to know it. I want him to see it.

"Come on, booger," I say, my arms stretched out.

She smiles and reaches for me immediately. I grab her up, and put her on my hip like she's two and not eight. I just wanna rub it in Bill's face a little more, and it definitely works. He glares at me, even has the nerve to work his jaw from side to side.

I smile back at him and plop down on the couch across from him so he can continuously be reminded that his granddaughter chose her half-sister over him. Lucky for me, Vega's already sitting down on it, so I just sit next to her.

She smiles at me, but I can tell she's feeling a little misplaced and uncomfortable. I know just how she feels.

"Where's Riley?" I ask her, wrapping my arms around Thing Two and clasping my hands together under her little fanny. My sister lays her head down on my chest, facing my girlfriend.

"Off wrestling the little boys, she's pretty good." Vega smiles, like she's proud of her. Then she reaches over and tweaks Amber's nose, eliciting a giggle from her.

And I realize that I really wouldn't. I wouldn't mind having kids with Vega. Not if this is how it would be.

She smiles brightly at me. I lean over and kiss her on impulse.

Vega kisses me back, and if it weren't for the brat still sitting in my lap, I'd hop into hers and have my way with her…or let her have her way with me.

But since there is a brat in my lap, I pull back. Vega gives me one more kiss before tickling and kissing on Amber. The kid is giggling like crazy.

We're at a party. Which means, it's that much more noticeable when everyone goes quiet.

And I'm just now realizing that everyone has gone quiet.

Fuck.

What the hell was I thinking? I know what kind of people these people are. I do. So why did I kiss my girlfriend in front of them? Why?

"Jade, can I see you down the hall for a second?" Bill says. He gets up, not even waiting for me to follow after him.

I could refuse. But then, he's such a bastard, he'd probably say something to my girlfriend. Give her a new "look" for me to try to fix.

I can't have that.

"I'll be right back." I tell my girlfriend. "Stay with Vega, booger." I command before placing the brat in Vega's lap.

"Jade?" My girlfriend calls.

"Don't worry," I wink. "He's just gonna give me the no PDA under his roof speech. I've heard it a dozen times." I lie. Then I sneak another kiss from her, just to show her everything's alright.

Once I catch up to Bill, he's standing in his bedroom doorway. He motions for me to go inside and I hesitate before doing so.

I hate being alone with him.

The door's not even shut all the way before he starts in on me.

"What you're doing is an abomination before God!" he hisses. That's how he starts off his rant. He goes on and on, about how I'm gonna burn in hell, and how I shouldn't be setting such a bad example for his granddaughters, blah, blah, blah.

I tune him out, that is until he tells me that he can't wait until Joy wises up and sends me back to my no good father.

It pisses me off. More than he usually does. I walk away, snatch the door open, and I'm about to just walk out of this fucking house and keep on walking until I'm home when he grabs my arm at the doorway.

"Where are you going?" He growls, yanking me around to face him.

"I'm going to go get my girlfriend, and then I'm coming back to your bedroom and I'm gonna fuck her on your bed!" I yell back.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Joy come out of the bathroom and she's frowning at me, probably about to tell me to watch my language. And then there's Amber, Riley, and Vega; Vega's trying to mediate the twins because they're fighting over who gets to go in next; but then everyone stops when this loud ass sound airs…Like it's super loud. My ear is ringing, my cheek is burning…wait…Oh. I finally connect the two and realize I got hit. Smacked in the face, by Joy's father.

It's nothing new. He's hit me plenty of times, but I guess I'm in so much shock because he never does it in front of an audience.

Never.

"Jade?" Joy breathes. I glance at her and I honestly don't think I've ever seen her so pissed. Seriously, I've done some fucked up shit before and she's gotten angry, but I've never seen her like this. Her face is so red, her fists keep clenching and unclenching, and she's shaking all over.

"I'm sorry." I apologize. I wasn't even thinking. She probably just got done bawling her eyes out, and I, being the selfish person that I am, just have to make a scene. I could've avoided this whole thing if I'd just kept my mouth shut.

"You're sorry?" She questions incredulously.

I watch her try and get her breathing under control, but it doesn't seem to be working. "Let's go." she says simply.

"Come on, Jade," Amber says, pulling on my hand.

I don't have to look at her to know she's crying. I can hear it in her voice.

I sigh deeply and let her lead me; I don't even feel like snatching away.

Vega comes around and grabs my other hand. She's walking super fast, like she can't get me out of the house fast enough. But that's nothing compared to how fast Joy's walking.

"Joy!" I hear her dad call behind us.

Joy stops, but only to usher us out the front door. "Let's go, Jade." she says impatiently. I'm freakin coming, but I seem to be moving too slow for her.

"Joy!" Bill tries again.

Apparently, Irene hears her husband because she comes rushing out of the kitchen and is now at her husband's side; walking us to Joy's car.

"What's going on?" Irene huffs, clearly in no shape to keep up. "Where are you going?"

"Home." Joy answers in a clipped tone. I have a feeling she doesn't plan on elaborating.

She jerks open the front passenger door, and Riley climbs in quickly. No argument whatsoever.

"Aren't you supposed to leave the girls here?" Irene asks.

Joy slams the passenger door shut. Thank God Riley's legs were already tucked up inside.

"I'm not leaving my kids here with you." Joy answers quickly. "Get in the car." She says to me.

I open up the back door and let Amber and Vega climb in while I watch Joy walk around to the front, her mother practically running to catch up with her.

"Why not?" Irene frowns. She's so confused.

Joy whirls around on her mother. "He just hit my kid." She says pointing toward the direction of her father. "Do you seriously expect me to leave the other two behind? With him?"

Irene shakes her head. "I'm sure it was a misunder"-

"What's to misunderstand about him hitting my kid?" Joy scoffs. "I saw it. I saw him do it, Mom!"

"Well Jade's not really your-"

"She's mine!" Joy screams so loud that I jump. I thought she looked pissed before; she looks like she's hanging on to her last piece of sanity by a strand of hair now. "MINE!" she screams again, thumping her chest way too hard.

Irene backs up, her jaw hanging down passed her knees.

Yeah, I probably have the same look on my face. But then Joy yells, "Jade, get in the fucking car!" And I snap out of it. I get in the car and quickly shut the door behind me. As soon as I do, Joy's driving off.

We get to the house in no time because Joy was speeding like a bat out of hell. I'm so surprised we didn't get pulled over.

Joy stomps her way up to the house. She doesn't wait for anybody. She just goes inside and slams the door shut behind her.

Tori doesn't think it's such a good idea to take the brats in there, so I ask Vega if they can sleep over at her place so Joy can cool down. And I can't believe it, but I tell her I'm gonna stay, just to make sure Joy's alright.

Yeah, there's something wrong with me.

Vega understands though. She kisses me, tells me to call if I need anything, and then she's taking the twins away.

I go up to my room and stay there the rest of the day. It's good for me. I need a good stewing. There are just so many things on my mind. First there's Vega, and the way I feel about her. Like that moment when I thought I could see myself having kids with her…what was that all about? I don't do brats.

Then there's Joy, and the way I feel about her. I never expected her to defend me like that. Not from her own parents. And the way she claimed me, the way she screamed at her mother that I was hers…It made me feel…I don't know. I don't know how to explain it.

Suddenly my door is opened and Joy stumbles in. It's dark outside now, so yeah, she's had plenty of time to drink herself into a drunken stupor.

I sit up in my bed, getting prepared to catch her if she starts swaying. She shuts the door and leans against it.

"Was that the first time?" she asks. No preamble, but I know what she's asking me. She wants to know if that was the first time Bill ever hit me.

"Yes." I lie.

She moans, like she's hurt.

What the hell….

"You're a good actress, sweetheart, but I always know when you're lying to me." She sighs, pressing a palm to her forehead as if that'll keep her from falling apart.

I look down at my lap. Why didn't I stay at Vega's?

She gets up off the wall and walks until she's standing in front of me. She doesn't speak until I look up at her. "Did he ever hurt you…a different way?" she asks.

I scrunch my face up. What the heck is she talking about?

"Did he ever touch you?" she elaborates.

"You mean…" Please God don't tell me she's asking me if her father ever molested me.

"Yes," she confirms. "Did he ever"-

"No!" I practically shout. The idea is just too disturbing. Why would she even think of something so disgusting?

"Don't lie to me, Jade! Don't you dare lie to me!" she screams, grabbing both my arms tightly and shaking me.

I jerk away from her. "I'm not! He never did that!" I scream back.

She looks down at her hands, like she can't believe she just shook me, but I don't hold it against her. She didn't hurt me.

"What kind of mother am I?" she asks.

I roll my eyes. Here we go.

"You're a great"-

"Stop lying to me!" she cuts me off.

I blink at her.

"I can't be a great mother!" She continues.

"Joy, you are"-

"No! Not if my kid is too scared to tell me someone's hurting her."

I shift uncomfortably. What else was I supposed to do? "He's your dad." I explain.

"So you think I'd let him hurt my kids?"

I hesitate. There's no doubt in my mind that Joy would kill her dad if he ever laid a finger on Riley or Amber; but me… I'm not her daughter. No matter how many times she says it, no matter how many times she introduces me that way, I'm still not her daughter.

"I don't think you'd let him hurt the girls." I answer.

She blinks at me, sobering up just a little bit.

"This isn't working." She murmurs while taking her phone of her pocket. "A waste of my money…. I'm gonna call her up….not spending another dime…."

I start to panic. She's calling up Helen, my principal. She's gonna stop paying my tuition. She's gonna pack me up and send me to New York.

"Joy. Stop. My principal's probably asleep right now." I claim while grabbing at her phone. Though my principal's probably not asleep. It's not that late. But if I can just get Joy to calm down, sober up. I can probably convince her to change her mind. I'll do anything. Extra chores. Pick up the twins from school every day, anything.

"I'm not calling your principal." She snaps at me, snatching her phone away.

"Who are you calling then?"

"My goddamn shrink. The bitch is fired….all these years…you know what she told me. Give it time. Give her space, she'll come around. Make sure she knows you're not trying to replace her mother." she quotes mockingly. "She'll resent you if you do."

The shrink? She's been going to a shrink for years…for me?

"Send her to New York with her mother and father for a little bit." Joy continues. "She's got to see that you're not trying to keep her from her parents."

She sent me away because her shrink suggested it?

"Fucking bullshit. In fact, you probably hated me more after that, didn't you?"

I don't answer her. I'm too busy thinking.

"That's what I thought. Yana!" Joy suddenly yells into her phone. I'm guessing the shrink picked up.

"Stop Joy, put the phone down!" I yell, grabbing the phone to keep her from doing something she'll regret in the morning.

"No!" She says stubbornly.

"Give me the phone now."

"No."

"Give it!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NOOO!"

"MOM!"

She blinks at me. Shocked as hell. Heck, I'm shocked too. I've never called her mom before. I never ever planned on doing it. But I don't know. I guess if she wants me so bad, she can have me.

"Give me the phone, Mom."

She blinks rapidly. The waterworks are coming.

"You can talk to Yana in the morning, when you're sober." I say soothingly, like I'm trying to coax a baby rabbit out from underneath its mother's warm body.

She hands it over, the quaking in her hands measuring about a four on the Richter scale.

"Let's get you to bed." I say, using the same soothing tone as before.

I pull back the comforter on my bed because there's just no way I'll be able to help Joy all the way to her room.

"I really do love you, you know?" she sobs. "I wouldn't let anyone hurt you. You've got to know that, Jade." She pleads. "You know that, don't you?"

If I didn't before, I certainly know it now.

"Yeah, I know," I mumble as I push her onto my bed.

"Yeah?" she looks me in my eyes. Hers are bright, lucid enough to lead me to believe that she just might remember this in the morning.

"Yeah, Mom. I know."

She smiles brightly at me and holds her arms out. I know she wants a hug. Vega does the same thing when she wants one of those godforsaken things.

"But don't get used to this. I'm hoping you're so drunk you won't remember this in the morning."

She wiggles her fingers a little, insisting on this damn hug.

I go to her and wrap my arms around her. She gives me a sloppy kiss on the side of my head and I don't even complain.

I sigh and embrace her. "You're worse than Vega."

In fact, she's a lot like Vega now that I think about it.

Gross, I would date a girl who's just like my mother.

The fucking Oedipus complex at its finest.