Like Cats and Dogs

by disnickyX

Tori and Jade don't get along. They're always fighting, even over the smallest of things. But then Tori's ex shows up at Hollywood Arts; and he's dating a girl named Melissa there. Tori tells him that she's dating someone new too. He invites her on a double date and now she's got a problem. She needs a date. Rating may change if I can get the courage to write one of those scenes

23. Forfeit: Chapter 23

{~~~~TORI~~~~}

I am not a creeper. Maybe a pathetic slut, but most definitely not a stalking creeper.

I came here, to the twins' elementary school, by accident. It's just that today's Thursday; and on Thursdays I pick them up from school. It's been that way for months.

So, I'm not a creeper. I came by accident. Out of habit.

Then I notice Joy's car is a few vehicles in front of me. And I remember. Me and Jade are on a break. Me and Jade need space; so I shouldn't be picking up her little sisters.

I get out of line quickly, and park a little ways off.

I should go home, but while I'm here, I might as well see if I can sneak a quick peek at them.

Okay, now I'm being a bit of a creeper.

I watch Amber and Riley quickly get in the car with their mother; and I roll my eyes as The Lady With The Clipboard gives Joy absolutely no trouble. I mean, I know Joy's their mother, but every time I tried to pick the girls up The Lady With The Clipboard acted like she'd never seen me before. It was like she had a personal thing against me. For no freakin reason at all!

And though I'm sulking a little over The Lady With The Clipboard's treatment of me, I'm still able to keep my focus on Joy's car. She doesn't pull off immediately. She greets her daughters first, but honestly, it looks like one of them is getting more of a scolding than a greeting.

It could only be Riley.

I smile slightly, wondering what my little monstrito has done.

Then Joy's gone.

I pull out too and head home.

I really don't want to go there. I just know it's gonna be weird. Without the twins coming over, I doubt Mom's gonna make tacos, like she's been doing. Papi will probably still watch his hockey, but what will he do afterward? Usually he shoots hoops with the girls.

Oh God, what if he tries to shoot hoops with me and Trina instead? Like we're some kind of substitutes, or something?

And Trina, she'll probably nag the heck out of me since the girls won't be there to play with her. And when I say play with her, I mean they won't be there to act as her mini slaves.

I'm pulling up to my house in no time. Mostly because I don't want to be here right now. That always happens to me. The sooner I want to get to a place, the longer it takes; and the more I dread going somewhere, the quicker it takes to get there.

I unlock the door as quietly as I can, trying to sneak myself in because I don't want anyone to know I'm home, especially Trina.

But, it's really of no use. I soon realize no one is home.

I don't know why that makes me feel a little bit empty. It's what I wanted, right? To not have to deal with my family today. But I don't know. The fact that they're all gone is just…it makes the house empty. The house is never empty on Thursdays. And it makes me feel so alone.

I go to my bedroom and start my homework. But it gets boring real quick. Usually on Thursdays I have the hardest time concentrating on it. There's always some kind of interruption. Amber's thirsty, or Riley just did something she's not supposed to, or Trina's trying to make me join them 'cause she claims she needs extra hands with her hair, or her face, or with her something.

Usually, all that aggravation frustrates me. Usually, I don't get my homework done until eight or nine o'clock. But today, with no interruptions at all, I'm able to breeze through my reading assignments; and they're so freaking boring!

I need a break.

Instantly I think of Jade. Of the break I needed from her.

I'm starting to regret it.

Seriously. So what if she doesn't love me? So what if she goes back to Beck. That was the deal. I knew that. Just because I fell in love with her doesn't mean I had to change the game on her. How selfish of me. Maybe I deserved for her to get that mad at me. Maybe I deserved for her to call me a slut. Maybe I deserved to be hurt like that. Maybe I'm hurting her the same way; by not allowing her to go back to the guy she loves.

Not that she can't go back to him now. She said it just yesterday. We can date whoever we want while we're on break. So, I might as well prepare myself to see her hanging around Beck.

At least, I think I should. But I'm just not so sure that's gonna happen all that soon. She had a chance to work with him today for our random elective. Russ put her and Beck together as stage fighting partners, but she absolutely refused to do it. She chose to work with Sinjin instead. Sinjin! She hates that guy. But she'd rather work with him than Beck.

It's so confusing.

I don't understand why she traded Beck for Sinjin. And I'm trying my best not to let a little hope flit through my heart. Because I want to believe she didn't want to work with Beck because she wants nothing to do with him, but I know that's not right. They're still friends. They've still been friends the whole time me and Jade were dating…fake dating.

Maybe she's mad at him right now. That's more than likely. Her being mad at Beck is nothing new. She was mad at him a lot while they were dating. More often than not, it was because he was being friendly with another girl. Sometimes the other girl would even be me.

Yeah, that's probably it. She probably caught Beck with another girl and is wazzed off at him right now.

It'll pass.

It always does.

I sigh deeply and shake my head at myself. Those two are no good for one another. I should just let Jade go so she can be with him. They'll break up eventually. Then I can….What? Make a move on Jade West?

I laugh a little to myself. The girl hates me! Why do I keep torturing myself? Why do I keep coming on to her, trying to get her to like me, or at the very least just to want me. It's pathetic. I'm really pathetic. But at the same time, I can't stop. I don't care that I'm being pathetic. I really love her. I don't want to lose her. That would hurt more than anything.

"Tori. You here, baby girl!?" I suddenly hear a voice shouting from downstairs. And instead of being alarmed because I didn't lock the doors and now there is someone in my house, I go downstairs.

It's only Josie.

Although, next time it could be a total stranger. So, I should start locking my doors. But for some reason, the thought of a burglar, or a murderer, entering my house while I'm home alone doesn't really dredge up any amount of real fear.

"Your door was unlocked." Josie says in an offhand manner, but if she really didn't care, she wouldn't have mentioned it at all.

"It was?" I ask innocently, feigning concern as I go to lock it.

Then I turn my full attention on her.

She's dressed as if she's going out and I raise my eyebrows at her. She probably wants me to babysit little Victor Alexander, but I'm not really in the mood. What if I get the urge to go to The Gorilla Club? I can't take him with me.

"Go get dressed. We're going out." She bosses me.

I just stand there. Me and her are going out? Why?

I mean, I don't need a reason to go out with one of my best friends, but it's a Thursday. Why are we going out on a Thursday?

"Let's go, Tori." she urges me, but manages to do so without raising her voice.

"Where's Victor?" I ask. I'm not really stalling. I think I'm just confused and I didn't know what else to say. I mean, honestly, Victor could be chillin' with her dad, his grandpa.

"I dropped him off at Jade's. Now hurry up, go get dressed." She bosses some more.

I blink at her. She dropped him off at Jade's house? "But…but, me and Jade are on a break." I stammer a little. I thought she knew that. In fact, I know she knows that.

She shrugs her shoulders. "She's still his godmother."

I frown. I didn't know she was serious about that. I thought she just said it to say it. To kind of call a truce with Jade since my girlfriend…fake girlfriend was acting all jealous of Josie when she met her.

"Look," Josie says after taking in my frown. "I don't fully understand why you two are on a break and I think both of you are stupid for it, but it's none of my business and it's got nothing to do with Victor. So, yeah, he's at Jade's. And now I'm stuck taking you out because it's your first Thursday without your baby sisters in law…whom you've grown a very weird, and unhealthy, attachment to, if you ask me. But that's none of my business either. So, I'm here as a distraction, because I'm your friend. So let's go." She shoos me.

I shake my head. "I don't think I really feel like going out." I admit, rather than let Josie push me into going somewhere "fun" with her.

"Then we'll stay in." she shrugs. Then she cocks her head to the side and looks down at my legs, as if just noticing them for the first time.

I look down too, wondering if there's something on them that I should be worried about.

"What are you wearing?" She asks.

I roll my eyes. Obviously there's nothing wrong with my legs.

"David let you wear that to school?" She asks. Again, she says it in an offhand kind of way, but if she didn't care, she wouldn't have mentioned it at all.

I roll my eyes again. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

"Nothing." She shakes her head and makes a surrendering gesture with her hands. "None of my business. So what do you want to do, watch a romantic comedy or something?" She changes the subject abruptly, as if she's trying to convince herself that what I'm wearing truly isn't any of her business.

"No. I don't want to watch a movie." I admit

"Then what do you want to do?"

"I want to go to sleep." I answer, a little too honestly I realize as soon as the words leave my mouth.

Josie narrows her eyes at me. "It's 4 in the afternoon."

"Well there's nothing else to do!" I snap back.

"Did you do your homework?"

I roll my eyes. "Yes."

"You ate dinner?"

"Not hungry."

"Did you shower? No." She answers for me as it's completely obvious because I'm still wearing what I wore to school today.

"Okay, shower it is." She says.

I don't move.

"Go." She dismisses me.

I groan in protest, before heading for the shower.

It takes all of fifteen minutes. Which means now its 4:15 and I have absolutely nothing to do.

Instead of meeting Josie back in the living room, I go straight to my room; planning on locking the door so she can't get in and pester me about sleeping the remainder of my day away. But guess who's in my room when I get out of the shower. Yeah, Josie.

She's sitting in my bed, flipping through TV channels.

"Josie…" I whine, because I'm so sure she did this on purpose. I'm so sure she knew I had plans of locking her out of my room and forcing her to go home; but now she's made it so that I can't.

She ignores me, and pats the spot next to her on the bed absently. I sigh and get in.

But I turn my back on her.

If she wants to have one of those heart-to-hearts where she tells me how stupid and pathetic I am, she can just forget it. I already know it, okay. I know I have to move on, let Jade go, blah blah, blah. I know I have to stop dressing like a slut, and find something to do other than sleep my day away. I know all of that! I just can't. And honestly, I don't want to.

But Josie doesn't say anything, and soon I fall asleep.

The bad thing about going to sleep at four in the afternoon, is you wake up way too early. I wake up at 1 in the morning. And I can't go back to sleep.

Josie's gone; not that I expected her to stay the whole night. In fact, I wanted her to leave, but now her absence makes me feel so lonely.

I try for a total of eight minutes to get back to sleep; but my eyes don't close, and my mind keeps wandering to my very unhealthy obsession. Jade.

I swear I'm gonna go crazy.

So, I get out of bed and sneak out. I don't even change clothes. There isn't really a set uniform for The Gorilla Club.

Like most clubs, it closes at 2a.m., so by the time I get there, I only have about half an hour to play.

It's plenty enough time.

I greet Billy and Big Dee at the door with an eager smile.

"Hey. Tor." They answer in unison, smiling back at me. I can't believe I used to be afraid of these two bouncers. They're actually really nice. Kinda.

I head straight for The Balls of Pain.

I've played everything here. That includes the bucking, fire breathing bunny and trying to get the banana from the big guy in the gorilla costume. But The Balls of Pain is my favorite.

I run through it a few times, easily making it without getting hit. But that's a little boring, so on the next run through I try to make it with my eyes closed.

Yeah, I don't make it. But it's fine. I'm not hurt too bad. I've been hurt worse.

So, I try again. And again, and again, until they close.

I got a lot of cheers and claps to my back from almost everyone here, and I smile for them, but I don't mean it. They think I'm brave. But I'm not. They have no idea how much of a coward I am. If I was really, truly brave, I'd go right up to Jade and tell her that I love her, for real. I'd ask her to try to love me back. Give me a chance. Pick me over Beck.

But I'm not brave enough to do that.

Getting blindsided by a 40 pound metal ball is way easier.

And way less scary.

And way less painful.

I have to drive home one handed though. It may be easier to get hit by a metal ball, but that doesn't mean that chiz doesn't hurt at all. Because it does. Now that it's over, and I'm on my way home, my arm is killing me.

I take a few painkillers as soon as I get in the house and investigate my arm. It's more bruised than it's ever been. But I don't think anything is broken. It'll be fine.

I get some ice from the freezer and hope the swelling goes down. I'll have to wear a long sleeve shirt tomorrow too.

Dang it. It's too hot for long sleeve shirts!

But I know it's no one's fault but my own. I can't be too upset, so I shake it off and get in bed.

I still can't sleep though. My arm really hurts, despite the painkillers.

God, I hope they kick in soon.

They don't kick in soon, but they kick in eventually and I'm able to finally get some sleep.

{~~~~O~~~~}

When I wake up, I'm late for school. I can tell by how bright it is outside. Usually, it's dark when I wake up during the weekdays.

I check my phone to see why my alarm didn't go off, only to realize it did. I just slept through it.

That's weird. Maybe sleeping through my alarm isn't that weird, but shouldn't my parents, or even Trina, have wakened me up or something?

I dress silently, and slowly. My arm is killing me. Seriously, it hurts five times more than it hurt last night. I need to take some more pills. So, I do. I wish they would work automatically, but they don't. I have to give them at least five minutes to start working their magic. Until then, I go downstairs and try to get a start on breakfast. I take my time because I'm already late for school. So, there's no need to rush.

That's when I see the note on the fridge. My parents and Trina went to visit my aunt, Sonya. They'll be back Saturday.

Seriously? They could've told me. Not that I would've wanted to go, but still…

I leave the kitchen, breakfast completely forgotten and go back upstairs to my bedroom. I grab all my school chiz and my keys and head out before turning around and coming right back in. Because guess what I forgot to do. I forgot to brush my teeth, and my hair. And my makeup, I didn't do that either.

I brush my teeth first, then decide that I don't really care about my hair and makeup.

I finger comb my hair into a sloppy bun and leave.

I've already missed first period, and I'll probably be late for second, but I don't really care.

I put my stuff in my locker quickly and get to class. My teacher, and everyone in the classroom, looks at me when I open the door, but I ignore them and sit down.

"Do you have a pass?" my teacher asks.

Crap.

I shake my head. "No."

She shakes her head back at me and tells me to see her after class.

Okay, I seriously deserve that, but I'm a little irritated as well. Not with my teacher, but with myself. I should've just skipped this class and been on time for third period.

I mean, I feel super guilty. I can hardly watch her as she teaches, so my eyes wander around the classroom. They land on Robbie a few times, and he's scowling at me every time, which I don't get. I didn't do anything to him.

We got along all day yesterday. 2nd period. 3rd period, and then instead of Sikowitz's class we had a random elective….Oh, crap! He's my partner for the stage fighting assignment! He was supposed to come to my house last night so we could practice a scene, but I went to bed early and I didn't wake up again until really late.

I check my phone and see that I have six missed calls from him. Crap! Okay he's got every right to be upset with me.

I'll make it up to him.

As soon as class ends, and my teacher's done having a talk with me about my tardiness, I meet Robbie at his locker and promise I'll rehearse with him right after third period.

He doesn't seem very inclined to forgive me, and why should he? We basically have five minutes to come up with a scene. Five minutes! God, we're so gonna fail!

I make a quick stop at my locker and then I'm on my way to third period, though I don't want to be. I'd very much like to skip it. And just as I'm almost there, my arm is grabbed. My left arm. The one that I had to take painkillers for.

I snatch away quickly, squealing in pain. Yeah, I took painkillers but they're not that strong. They're just over the counter stuff.

"What the hell, Icky!"

Icky. Must be Lissa.

I turn to face her; and I try my best to smile at her as I greet her, but there are tears in my way.

That chiz really hurt!

Next thing I know, my sleeve is pushed up, there's a gasp, and then she's pulling me somewhere by my hand.

I wipe the tears from my face when we stop and I look around. We've ended up in the janitor's closet.

I'm banned from this place, but it's not like I'm in here with Jade, so no one will think I'm splunking.

"What the fuck is wrong with your arm?!"

I blink a bit. Coarse language coming from Lissa is pretty rare. Then I look down at my arm, already knowing what I'm going to see. Funny thing, I kinda gasp too. It's gotten worse since I last looked at it. It's all kinds of purple and green.

It's quite fascinating actually.

"Who did this?!" Lissa continues.

"No one." I say, looking up from my arm. She's truly freaked. Like that time she saw the Band-Aids on my wrists and assumed I was purposely cutting myself. "I went to The Gorilla Club last night."

"Tori"- She starts, but I cut her off with a dismissive wave of my hand.

"It didn't hurt that bad."

She looks at my arm, disbelief pouring out of her eyes.

"It looks worse than it feels." I try again.

She reaches out and squeezes gently. Only it doesn't feel like a gentle squeeze at all.

"Hay!" I yelp.

She raises her eyebrows. "It looks worse than it is, huh?!"

"I didn't say it doesn't hurt at all!" I yell back.

"Ugh! Why are you two even on a break?" She yells at me.

I have absolutely no idea where that came from and it throws me off completely, but for some reason I answer all the same. "She doesn't love me."

"She doesn't love you?" Melissa asks incredulously.

"Well, not the way I love her." I cover, suddenly remembering that Jade has done a more than sufficient job of acting like she's in love with me. Therefore Lissa's confusion is not unwarranted. "So, I asked for a break and now she's free to see whoever." I finish, mumbling the last bit. But she hears me anyway.

"See whoever like who?" She asks me, looking right into my eyes in this very intense and uncomfortable way.

I shrug.

"Like Beck?" she persists.

I wince at his name, feeling a little stab of pain because of the fact that he's the obvious choice, but I manage to shrug my shoulders like I couldn't care less.

The bell rings then, signaling I've got just a few minutes to get to class. I halfway expect, and slightly hope, Lissa will keep me from going. No, I don't want to hear about how reckless, and dangerous, and irresponsible I am, but I don't want to go to class either.

But Lissa lets me go. Well, she more or less pushes past me, and slams the door shut behind herself. Right in my face.

So rude.

I get out just in time to see her grab Jade by the wrist and pull her into the bathroom.

Now that was weird. What the hell could she possibly say to Jade? And even if she does tell Jade about my arm, it's not like my fake girlfriend will really care that my arm is bruised, right?

I shrug it off and go to class. I don't listen to a thing my teacher says though. I'm too busy thinking, and debating with myself. Should I let Jade go, or hold on? Letting go, will be better. I can move on, blah, blah, blah. But if I hold on, it'll just keep hurting.

I must like hurting myself, because I'm still leaning toward holding on.

Pathetic.

Abruptly, the bell rings and I should be free to go, but my teacher makes me talk to him after class. It's like déjà vu from second period, just with a manly voice.

He tells me he noticed I wasn't really here in the classroom today. Just kinda spaced out. He tells me that I'm not usually like that, and he's here for me if I need anything. So, I smile and tell him I'm fine. I'll do better Monday. And I apologize twice before he lets me go on my way.

Next class is fourth period.

Next class I spend with Jade.

I only saw my fake girlfriend once today; when Melissa pulled her into the bathroom. Now I'm about to share a whole class with her, and then lunch.

And even though I should dread it, I'm looking forward to seeing her.

Even though I know she's acting, I like it when she's talking to me, and acting concerned for me, and touching me. Even though it's fake, it doesn't stop it from feeling good.

I know, I know. Pathetic. But I don't care.

I'm on my way to Sikowitz's class when Robbie pulls me into the janitor's closet. My second time being in here today.

"Rehearsal, remember?" He reminds me.

That's right. We have stage fighting now, not improv…but how the heck are we gonna rehearse in a closet?

Whatever.

We don't have time to argue. We just have five minutes. And we actually are able to come up with something….passable within that time. At least, I hope we get a passable grade. Mostly for Robbie's sake. It's not his fault I forgot and slept through all of his calls yesterday.

We practice our stunts and that's it. That's all we have time for. We're gonna have to improv the rest, and thanks to Sikowitz I'm able to do that.

We even practice a little past the first bell before calling it quits and going to fourth period.

Strangely enough, me and Robbie are first in class after our impromptu rehearsal in the closet, and I get the feeling we weren't the only ones trying to get a little last minute practice in.

I spend the first couple of minutes waiting for Jade to show up. I look back every time the door opens. Cat comes in, then some shruggers, followed by Melissa and André; but no Jade. And no Beck either.

They're probably together.

Of course they're together. It's been about those two since I got here. Jade's so in love with him that she agreed to date me, the girl she absolutely hates, just to make him jealous.

And it worked.

He's been waiting for her to come back to him ever since. He'd been in denial at first, but then I could see when it started to sink in. He was so sad.

I could see he wanted her back so bad.

And now, me and Jade are on a break. Of course they're gonna start seeing each other again.

There's no reason for me to be surprised if she walks in with Beck.

Just as I think that thought, Jade walks in by herself. By herself. She looks around for just a second before spotting me. Then she walks up to me.

"Get up." She commands.

I don't move right away. I think I'm just a little happy to see her without Beck.

Then she snatches up my hand and leads me out of the classroom.

I can hear a few snickers from my classmates. One even yells out "booty call!" behind us.

I roll my eyes. This is not a booty call.

I'm lead to the bathroom and into the first stall. Then Jade pushes up the sleeve on my left arm.

I hurry up and pull it down at the look she's giving me. Like I'm pathetic and stupid.

"Vega, what the fuck?"

She doesn't yell. I kinda wish she would. Then I could yell back. But when she speaks calmly like this. It just makes me feel stupid.

And worthless.

And pathetic.

"It's nothing." I look down at my shoes.

"Your arm is purple." She deadpans.

"It's not that bad."

"It's not that bad?" she mocks me.

"No."

"It's not that bad?" she repeats.

"No." I shake my head for emphasis, since she's acting like she didn't hear me the first chizzin' time.

"It's not that bad!?" She screams this time. "Your arm is fucking PURPLE!"

I flinch a little. What's the big deal? It's my arm.

I hear her sigh, and then she takes a step toward me; but a little one because we're already cramped in this tiny stall. Her hands go to my shoulders, but her touch is so light I can barely feel it. That's when she kisses my forehead.

"Vega, what do you need?" she murmurs softly.

I look up from my feet. I look right into her eyes, my special blues, and my eyebrows raise in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"You're hurting. Bad." She explains patiently, her whole demeanor just doing a complete 180. "This isn't like you." She continues. "What do you need me to do to make it stop? I'll do anything."

"Anything?" I question, a bit hopeful with all the possibilities. Then my doubt kicks back in. There's no way she'd be willing to do anything.

"Anything." She repeats firmly.

"No you won't." I shake my head.

"Yes I will. Just as long as it doesn't hurt you more."

So, does that mean I can ask her not to date Beck while we're on break? Would she really do it? Would she even consider it?

"You know what it is, don't you?" she whispers. "You already know what I could do to stop your visits to The Gorilla Club; so just ask. I'll do it." Her fingers knead my shoulders gently, and I close my eyes.

It feels so good.

"Just ask, baby."

I take a deep breath and let it out.

I can do this.

"While we're on break…." I start off, but I can't seem to get past that part.

"Yes?" she prompts.

"Never mind." I wimp out, and I try to leave, but she won't let me.

"Tell me." She demands, grabbing my face with both hands. "Tell me, baby. I'll do it."

"Pinky promise?" I ask. It just slips out.

"Pinky promise." She says, before holding up her pinky for me to take.

I blink at her. "But…but you don't even know what it is."

"So." She shrugs. "You'll just owe me one of these blind pinky promises one day. Deal?"

I nod my head. "Deal." I agree as I link my pinky with hers.

"Okay. So, what do I have to do?"

"Uh…I uh,"-

She sighs, getting a little impatient with my stalling. "Whatever it is, I already have to do it 'cause I pinky promised. All that's left is for you to tell me what I have to do."

"O…okay." I stutter.

Be brave Tori. I coach myself.

"While we're on break…." I start, but I get stuck on this part again.

"I heard this part already." She makes a continue gesture with her hand.

"I don't want you to date Beck." I breathe out. Praying that she'll go for it. That she'll just give me a chance.

"Done." She says; no hesitation whatsoever.

"Done?"

"Mhm."

"That's it?" I ask incredulously.

"Yep. And that means no more Gorilla Club for you, okay?"

I nod my head, still shocked she agreed to my terms so quickly.

She kisses the side of my face.

"Now, come on. We have to get to class." She says before taking my hand and leading back to fourth period.

I smile after her. She must care for me a little bit, right? She doesn't hate me, right? I mean, she promised she wouldn't date Beck while we were on break, just so that I wouldn't go get myself banged up at The Gorilla Club. That's gotta count for something.

Jeez, if I had known it would be that easy, I would've made her promise not to ever break up with me.

I shake my head. I'm not that pathetic. And also, that's a pinky promise I could totally see Jade breaking. Just like she broke the pinky promise about never calling me a slut…. Which means she could also break her pinky promise to not date Beck while we're on break.

The thought deflates me completely.

When me and Jade get back to our elective, Russ makes me and Robbie go first. I think it's a punishment for being late to his class; but at the same time, it's a good thing too, because if I would've had to wait, my nerves would've gotten the best of me. Especially if Melissa and Cat would've gone first, and not right after me and Robbie. Seriously, after seeing Melissa and Cat's scene I start to wazz out a little. They were excellent, perfect even. Me and Robbie were nowhere near as cohesive; but then a couple of other kids go, and they're way worse than we were.

I calm down, feeling like maybe me and Robbie will do just fine.

Jade lucks out though. As soon as she and Sinjin take the stage, Jade gets called to the office. I know she's being sent home because she's told to bring her stuff as well.

Before leaving, Jade comes up to me, whispering, "My hearing is today." Before kissing my lips.

I totally forgot about Jade's hearing and I hope everything goes well.

It also reminds me that I have no idea why she assaulted Hudson in the first place, and I make a mental note to myself to ask her later.

At the end of class, Russ congratulates, and dismisses, us all; and now I just have lunch and a few more classes to get through before I can go home.

Naturally, they trudge by so freakin slow. But when school finally ends, all it takes is one thought of how empty my house is going to be, and I make a quick detour towards the twins' school.

Yeah, I'll admit it now. I've officially become a creeper.

But the girls aren't there waiting to be picked up. Joy probably had to pick them up early so she could take Jade to her hearing.

I sigh and head home.

If me and Jade weren't on break, Joy probably would've just asked me to pick the girls up. But she can't anymore. And for some reason that makes me feel guilty. I don't know why. I mean, before I met Jade's family, they were getting along just fine without me. I bet Joy didn't even think about asking me to pick up the girls. That's just me being a needy creeper.

As soon as I get home, I check my slap page out of sheer boredom because there's absolutely nothing else for me to do.

Jade posted a message saying her ankle monitor is off.

So, that means her hearing went well, right? It means she's not going to jail; that she's been let off the hook?

Then I realize what it actually means for her to have her ankle monitor off. It means she can go wherever she wants. It means she can come here, to my house. She probably will come here, wanting to talk. Wanting to persuade me to end this break.

There's a lot of kissing, and petting, and the good kind of name calling involved when Jade talks to me about ending the break. And it always feels really good. Even if it is acting.

I jump up to get ready, being careful of my bruised arm. I take a shower, getting nice and clean before spraying myself with the perfume I know Jade likes the best. I put on makeup to my best ability and I brush my hair as well.

It's a very slow process because of the pain in my arm, and I hope Jade doesn't come before I'm done.

She doesn't.

Then I wait, keeping my phone close to me. She'll probably call first.

Maybe.

Nah, it's more Jade-like for her to just come barging into my house.

So, I make sure that the door's unlocked so that she can.

While I'm waiting, I check her slap page again.

She's home now.

She'll probably be here in about half an hour.

So I sit in the living room and I wait. The TV's on, so it won't be obvious that I'm waiting on her, but I am. I'm most definitely waiting for her.

I wait thirty minutes.

I wait an hour.

I wait for hours.

I wait until it becomes apparent that she's not coming.

She didn't call me to let me know how her hearing went, and she's not coming over.

Why am I surprised?

Suddenly, I get the urge to go to The Gorilla Club. It hits me out of nowhere, and it hits me so hard that I stand up and go to the door. But then I remember. I can't go to The Gorilla Club anymore. I pinky promised Jade I wouldn't.

I groan and go upstairs. I'm just going to go to sleep and hope that I don't wake up at 3 o'clock in the morning.

{~~~~O~~~~]

No such luck.

And when I do wake up, I totally freak. I notice right away that someone is in my bed with me.

I'm ashamed to admit that I don't freak because there's a stranger in my bed. I don't feel scared for my life, or scared of what this persons intentions are toward me. I freak because I know it's not Jade in bed with me.

Jade sleeps naked. The person in my bed is wearing clothes, and it feels weird.

I screech and push the person out of my bed.

He, or she, lands with a loud thump, and I hop out of bed to turn my lamp on.

"Fuck!" The person curses. And I swear it sounds just like Jade.

I climb back in bed and lean over the side to peer down at him, or her, just in time for her to spring up and tower over me.

It is Jade.

Oops.

"Sorry, Jade," I squeak, bending my head back so I can look up at her. "I didn't recognize you with clothes on."

She raises her eyebrows at me.

Yeah, that totally came out wrong.

"I mean...uh...I..." I stumble, trying to fix it.

She smirks at me. "You wanna see me naked, don't you?"

"Yes." I bite my lip.

Her smirk drops, and I realize what I just said.

Oh my God!
I clap my hand over my mouth. I seriously can't believe I really just said that out loud!

She squats down some, putting us face to face. Then she grabs my face in both her hands. "You can see me naked when this break is over, baby."

She's no longer smirking and being silly. Her expression is so serious. And there's this look in her eyes. It makes me feel like when I do see her naked, we won't just be preparing for sleep. We'll be preparing for…We'll be getting ready to…you know.

I can't help it. I lean in and kiss her.

She pulls back immediately. Like I burned her. And my face grows hot.

Obviously I've misread this moment.

"When do you think that'll be, by the way?" she asks.

I blink a few times. Not just from confusion, but from the tears that threaten to appear.

"This break," Jade emphasizes when I don't answer right away. "How much longer do you think it'll be?"

I shrug.

"Well, is there anything I can do to speed it along? Another pinky promise, or something?" She asks, so much hope in her eyes that I can't even look at her. I look down at the bed below me, which is kinda hard as Jade still has my face in her hands.

She lifts upward with her wrists and I'm suddenly back to looking her in the face.

"Come on, baby." She coaxes. "There has to be something you want from me, or we wouldn't be on a break."

She's right. There is something I want form her. I want her to love me, but I don't think I can get that from a simple pinky promise. So I just shake my head, "No."

She sighs. "There is something. You're just too scared to ask for it."

"I am." I admit.

She sighs again, dropping my face and standing up fully.

"Are you leaving now?" I ask, wondering if I've made her mad enough to cut this visit short.

She looks down at me, and at first I see annoyance all over her face, but it starts to disappear quickly. Her eyes soften and she exhales a gentle breath of air.

It makes me wonder if she just slipped up. Did I just see the way she really feels about me and she was slow to cover it up?

It hurts my heart a little to think about that and I look down trying to fix my face if it's showing my hurt. But it's so hard for me. And I suddenly find myself a little jealous of Jade. If she can cover her annoyance, why can't I cover my sadness?

Then Jade gets in bed between me and the headboard. "Come here." She demands. And I snuggle up against her immediately, fitting my face into her neck.

Pathetic.

She kisses the side of my face and I try to snuggle even closer to her. But it's simply not possible.

Super pathetic.

"Baby?" Jade suddenly whispers against my ear. It tickles, and makes me shiver a little.

"Hm?" I answer.

"You left the front door unlocked."

I did. And I left it unlocked on purpose, so I don't say anything.

"It's dangerous," she reprimands. "Be more responsible. Any old freak could've just walked in here."

"Like you?" I grin against her neck, wanting to keep this light. To not have to talk about my recklessness in a serious manner.

"I'm not a freak." Jade yawns.

"Yes you are."

She snorts a little and squeezes my waist lightly. "I miss you, baby."

"I miss you too, Jade."

"Then end this break and we can be together." She bends down and kisses me softly. "Don't you want to be together?"

I nod my head because I really do want to be with her. She's got to know that. I've said it so many times, and in so many different ways.

"So…." She prompts.

I don't trust my voice to work properly, so I keep silent. And anyway, what does she want me to say? Does she really want me to tell the truth? Or does she want me to give her a line? Is she feeding me lines right now?

"Vega, talk to me." She murmurs sleepily.

"Sleep, Mami." I sigh, sneaking a kiss to the underside of her jaw.

"No, not until you tell me." She insists. "Please."

And it's not often that I hear Jade say please, so I tell her. I say, "I don't trust you." Just four little words, but they seem so harsh when they escape my lips.

I want to take them back because I didn't really mean to say them. And then there's the fact that she's gone so quiet. Trust me, it's not because she's fallen asleep. Her grip on my waist is way too tight for that.

"I'm working on that." She sighs, finally responding before kissing my forehead.

I exhale, extremely glad that she didn't blow up at me.

She kisses me again; on my cheek this time, but I want her lips. I lift my face up and stretch a little so I can press mine to hers.

She pulls back before we can really get started and I feel a little rejected.

I don't want to face her anymore.

I sit up and her grip on me tightens.

"Where do you think you're going?" I think she means for her voice to be stern, but because she yawned at the same time, it's anything but.

"I don't want to sleep this way. It's weird." I answer while moving to my regular side of the bed. Because it is weird. Who sleeps parallel to their headboard?

Jade huffs a little before moving too. And I wait for it. For her to wrap her arm around my waist and press her body against my back.

I don't have to wait long, and soon enough I can feel her slow steady breath tickling the back of my neck.

I think she's fallen asleep already.

"Jade." I call.

No answer.

"Jade?" I try again.

Still no answer.

"I love you." I say.

Of course there's no answer, and I don't expect one either. She's asleep. She doesn't have to pretend to want to say it back.

I yawn, my body signaling to me that it's time to sleep. Automatically my fingers go to my belly button, but Jade's hand is kinda in the way. For a split second, I find myself wondering how it would feel if Jade rubbed my belly until I fell asleep.

I shake my head, trying to shake the thought away as well. I can't imagine her doing that! She'd be creeped out for sure. I can't believe the thought even came to my head!

And as if to punish myself, I absolutely refuse to do it. To rub my belly button. It also means I don't get any sleep.

I try. I really do. I keep my eyes closed and try to relax. I count sheep. I try every trick in the book, but I still can't sleep. And I still refuse to give in to the stupid button.

{~~~~~O~~~~~}

Morning takes forever to come. And as soon as my alarm clock says 7:00am, I get out of bed. Although it's Saturday and I love the feeling of Jade's arm around me, I couldn't lay there for another second.

I go downstairs and put on a pot of coffee. And while I wait for it to brew, I debate with myself over whether or not I should give Jade some. Not the beverage kind, but the lip gloss kind.

I haven't done that in a while.

I go back upstairs quietly and peek in on her. She's the same way I left her. She's actually in the same position she'd been in all night. And I should know. I never went to sleep. But even in her sleep, Jade never let me go. She held me all night.

And it felt really good that it was a subconscious act on her part.

It makes me wonder if I can get her to give me a hint as to whether or not she's subconsciously repulsed by me.

And I know exactly how I'm going to test that.

I quickly find my bag, rummage through it, and put the coffee flavored gloss on. Then I walk over to Jade and press my lips to hers. I keep my eyes open, so I can watch her, but being this close makes me feel a little cross-eyed.

She doesn't wake up immediately, so I nip, just a little.

She gives this little whistle snort thing that's so cute, I can't help but smile.

Then her eyes open and I kiss her.

Immediately she smiles and grabs my face. Then she's sucking off all the gloss, like she used to do before.

"Hey," she pants, long after the gloss is gone.

"Good morning, Jade. I made some coffee." I smile at her. Then I quickly turn away and go down to the kitchen. I don't want her to see all the conflicting emotions flit across my face.

And I have a lot of conflicting emotions running across my face, because the first thing Jade did when she discovered it was me kissing her was smile.

Don't get me wrong, that makes me happy. Especially because she didn't seem startled or disgusted. She seemed to like it. She passed the test with flying colors.

It's just that if she weren't such a good actress, I'd have no trouble believing she meant it. I mean, I want to believe nobody's that good. I want to believe no one is able to look someone they hate in the eyes and smile, and kiss them, and hint that they love them. No one's that good of an actor, right?

But what if I'm wrong?

Do I really wanna take that chance?

Would it be worth it?

It's so sad that about eighty percent of me thinks that it would be worth it. To have her love me, for just a little while. And only twenty percent of me thinks I shouldn't set myself up for that kind of hurt.

Absently, I pour Jade's cup of coffee and add her two sugars. For me, I pour a glass of orange juice.

Jade finally comes downstairs and I wordlessly hand her the hot beverage.

"I'll trade this for more Vega Coffee," she grins while wiggling her eyebrows at me.

I smile at her and take another sip of my juice.

I can't help but wonder if that was just a line.

Ugh, this is driving me completely insane!

After a little while, I notice Jade's staring at me. It makes me wonder how long she's been doing it.

I wipe the back of my wrist across my upper lip, thinking I must have some juice on it, but it's completely dry.

So why the chiz is she staring at me?

"What?" I frown.

"Can't I look at my girlfriend?" She retorts immediately, like she'd been waiting on me to say that.

I sigh. "What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing." She smiles softly. "You're perfect."

I start to blush. I can't help it. It's involuntary. My body doesn't care if that was a line or not. It likes hearing those words come from Jade's mouth.

"Well, not perfect. This break of yours…" She trails off.

I roll my eyes and groan. "Jade, I" -

"Okay, I'll drop it for the next ten minutes." She cuts me off.

"Jade…"-

"So, what do you want to do today?" She cuts me off yet again.

I'd be too much of a creeper if I say I want to spend the day just being with her. So I keep my mouth shut and shrug my shoulders.

"Well, pick something, because If I get to choose…" She bites her lip suggestively, which makes me blush something fierce.

"Jade!"

"I'm just kidding; but that color on you face is a not-so-kidding kind of turn on; so, come on. Pick something. You wanna go out, stay in,"-

"Stay in." I interrupt hastily.

"You just wanna keep me to yourself," She teases.

I nod my head in a serious manner all the same.

"Okay." She says, her attitude changing from teasing to serious to match mine.

She comes up to me and wraps her arms around my waist. She's extremely careful with my arm when she does it. Which is good because I totally forgot about the stupid thing. And it's like, because she's acknowledged it, now I realize it hurts. Bad. I haven't taken anything for it. "I'm here." Jade whispers, distracting me once again from the pain in my arm. "What do you want to do now?"

I don't even think about it. I kiss her.

She pulls back almost immediately and presses her forehead to mine, eyes closed. "We can do a little of that; but nothing further than second base while we're on break, okay?"

"Okay." I nod. "I love you." I don't mean to say it. It just slips out.

She sighs and pulls away a little. "You can't keep saying that to me just so you can get upset when I want to say it back, Vega."

I shrug my shoulders. "Sometimes I can't help it." I answer honestly. "I mean it, and I know…." I pause there until I find a way to word this right. Because I was going to say that I know she's just acting, but I'm not really supposed to say that. Then I decide on, "I know I love you more than you love me."

It's perfect.

"You don't know that." She scoffs at me.

"Yes I do." I scoff back.

"Well, you don't."

I frown. "I don't what?"

She crosses her arms over her chest. "You don't love me more than I love you."

I frown some more. "Yes I do."

"No, you don't. In fact, I can get all wazzy with you and say you don't love me as much as I love you."

I'm. So. Chizzin'. Confused.

"And if I was to tell you to prove it," She continues. "How would you? What could you do?" She challenges.

"I would."- I stop and think about it for a second, realizing Jade's right. How do you prove that you love someone? You can't prove it with a simple kiss. You'd have to use actions, lots of them, and consistently over a long period of time.

"Fine," I submit. "I won't say it anymore either, you win."

I don't know where I plan on going, but I do make to walk away like a true drama queen.

"Hey," she pulls me back to her, still careful of my arm. "I like hearing it. I just wish you wouldn't spazz whenever I say it too." She explains.

See? It's this. This is why I forgot we were only fake dating in the first place. This is why I'm so confused right now. I don't know if that was just a line. I can't tell if she's acting.

It's freaking frustrating!

I pull away. But gently and with a smile this time so she doesn't think something's wrong.

"Let's watch a movie or something." I suggest.

"Only if I get to pick." She counters.

Without my consent, my face scrunches up into a frown. Me and Jade's taste in movies are completely opposite from one another, and I'm not exactly in the mood to watch one of her kind of movies.

"Never mind," I shake my head. "Let's…" Hm…. Come to think of it, me and Jade differ on nearly everything. It's like we're complete opposites. And not in the good "opposites attract" kind of way. More like, since we can never agree on things to do, we'll end up doing what Jade wants because she's the bossiest. Unless I feel like putting my foot down, and that usually results in us battling until I lose my resolve. So she still wins, eventually. I always -

"Let's what?" Jade asks, reminding me that I kind of left her hanging.

I frown at her. "Jade?"

"What?" She frowns at me, noticing the change to the tone of my voice.

And I know this is gonna seem as though it's come out of nowhere to her, but I just gotta ask. "Are we only good at making out? Is that the only thing we know how to do together?"

"Of course not, Vega." She grins. Like I'm being silly. "We're pretty good at fighting too. Passionately I might add."

I roll my eyes. "Jade…"

"What?"

I pull away from her, successfully this time. "This is what we need to use this break for. We don't share any likes!"

"Hey," She tries to grab me back, but I don't cooperate. Not all the way. She only gets my hand this time, not my waist. "Fighting and making out work for us, Vega. It doesn't mean we don't love each other or that our relationship has no merit. It just means….it just means..."

"I'm waiting." I goad, tugging at my hand a little.

She holds on tighter.

"It just means we don't need much. Just each other." She finishes.

It's a good line.

"And when we get tired of that?" I counter.

"We'll take a break," she suggests, only having to think about it for a second. "But nothing like this one. This one has gone on long enough. In the future, when we take breaks they can only last 12 hours. And you get one a month." She adds on as an afterthought.

"What?" I scoff. "I don't think so."

"What? That's a good deal."

"No it's not; breaks have to be longer than 12 hours." I insist.

She narrows her eyes at me. "Like how long. 24?"

I roll my eyes. "No, more like a week."

"A week!?" She screeches. "Hell no. Thirteen hours."

"Jade," I sigh exasperatedly. Does she have to be so ridiculously difficult about everything?!

"What?" She snaps. And I realize not only is she being difficult, but she's gotten angry.

"Fine, five days." I relent.

She shakes her head. "That's still a week."

"No it's not."

"It's a business week."

"Four days then." I compromise, still rolling my eyes because she's seriously taking this too far.

She just glares at me.

"What?" I ask.

"You're trying to make me mad, aren't you?"

Seriously?

"No. You're just wanting to fight." I counter. "This is nothing to fight over."

"You don't think this is a big deal?"

"No."

Jade tugs me closer, getting my waist into her clutches once again. "My girlfriend is telling me she needs a week out of a month away from me." She snarls. And it's scary, but she's so sexy like this that I don't mind it so much. "That's 12 weeks a year." She continues. "You know that's 3 months, right? You want to spend three months out of the year away from me."

I place my hands over hers. "Jade"-

"That's a quarter of a year you want to spend away from me." She emphasizes with a not so gentle squeeze.

Ugh. "I never said I needed a week out of every month. I just said when I get tired of fighting with you. I'll probably only need a week out of every two months, honestly."

"That's still six weeks! It's still"-

"Fine." I give in before she can go on another rant. "Two days; but they have to be consecutive, and I get two of those a month."

She grits her teeth; then slowly grinds them.

I stare back at her waiting for her to speak, but it doesn't seem like she's going to. It seems like she's waiting for me to give in to her terms. For me to give in to 13 hours a month. And I'm about to do it too, but then she finally speaks. "How about two consecutive days a month, period."

"Or"-

"Period!"

"Fine." I back down.

She holds her pinky up, and I grin as I take it. I can't even help it.

"What are you smiling about?" she scowls at me.

I shrug, but can't stop smiling.

It's the funniest thing. Jade used to hate pinky promises, now she keeps offering them to me. Not only that, but she just swore we'd get breaks, once a month, as in, in the future. That can only mean she plans on being my girlfriend for years to come right. That couldn't have just been a line, right?

Okay, Tori. Calm down. Don't get excited.

I straighten my face abruptly, determined not to get my hopes up. If it was a line, it was a good one. But if it wasn't….

"So, what do you want to fight over now?" I ask as casually as I can.

She doesn't seem to want to, but she smiles at me. "Well, first I want some more coffee." She kisses me lightly. "Then I want to argue over whether or not I'll like what you plan on wearing tonight. Then"-

"Wait," I cut in. "Where are we going tonight?"

"Wanko's Warehouse." She says as if she's told me a thousand times.

She hasn't.

She hasn't even told me once.

"Why?" I ask.

She frowns at me. "Didn't you check your slap page last night?"

I nod my head. "Once, when I got out of school."

She rolls her eyes at me. "We're all going to Wanko's tonight, even Other Vega, because there's an 80 percent off sell at seven."

"Oh." I say, but then I get to thinking. "If we're just going to Wanko's why would there be an argument over what I wear?"

She shakes her head at me. "Vega, it's a slumber party. A coed slumber party. So I better approve of your nighties."

"A slumber party at Wanko's?" I frown some more. I so don't get it.

She sighs.

"The sale isn't until 7am tomorrow. We're going to go in and stay the night so we can skip the lines in the morning." She says. As if that's totally normal.

So, I stare at her, waiting for her to tell me she's joking.

She doesn't. She says, "What?" instead.

What? WHAT?

What the chiz does she mean by "what!?"

"I think we're about to do one of those things that we do really well together." I say in a very calm voice.

She smiles at me, then leans in as if she's about to kiss me. As if I was referring to making out as that thing that we do really well together.

You're chizzin' me!

I push at her chest. "What do you mean we're staying the night!?" I yell.

"What the fuck are you yelling for?" She yells back, clearly startled.

Servers her right too!

"Are you insane?! There are a million and one reasons why that isn't a good idea. What if there are night time guards?"-

"There aren't."

"A security alarm that"-

"I know a guy." She interrupts again.

"What guy?"

"You jealous?"

"Jade!" I yell, getting a little more frustrated. She seriously can't be serious. She just got her ankle monitor off!

"God, you're hot when you're all upset like that." She steps a little closer to me. I think she's gonna kiss me, or something.

"Jade…" I warn her.

"No, keep going."

And even though I realize I'm giving her exactly what she wants, I still can't help but to blow up at her again.

She smiles and starts walking toward the stairs as I yell at her back about all the ways spending the night at Wanko's is a bad idea.

"So, I think you should wear this." She cuts me off abruptly, and I realize we're in my room and she's been going through my dresser.

She's pulled out a really long sleeve t-shirt, and some long sweat pants.

"I'm not wearing anything because I'm not going." I rebuttal immediately.

"Yes you are. And you most certainly are wearing something. If I can't sleep naked, neither can you, babe."

And even though I'm totally against the idea of illegally camping out in Wanko's, I can't help but to snatch the clothes Jade's chosen and stuff them back into my dresser drawers. "Well, I'm not wearing that!" I declare as I pull out some shorts and a cami.

Jade's eyes go wide. "Definitely not." She exclaims while making a grab for them.

I snatch them back and out of her reach, "What are you wearing?"

She goes to her bag and pulls out a cami and some shorts...the same exact thing I want to wear.

Seriously?

"Jade"-

"What? I get more jealous than you do." She claims.

"No you don't."

"Yes I do, ask anyone."

And I know it's true. If I were to ask someone, they'd side with Jade, but only because she shows her jealousy, fake and real, in such a loud and violent way.

"Well, maybe I trust you." I counter.

No answer.

"You can say you trust me!" I snap.

She stomps up to me and makes another grab at my choice of nightwear. "You're not wearing these. That's what the fuck I can say."

"Language!"

"Give me the shorts, Vega!" She ignores me.

"Give me yours!"

"One…two…"-

"Three…four." I continue for her. "I can count too, you know!"

She growls, then grabs my shorts and yanks them, hard, pulling me toward her, but not before I hear the unmistakable sound of them ripping.

We both fall; me landing on top of her.

By some miracle I managed not to bang up my already bruised arm, and I soon realize Jade was my miracle. She held onto my arm. She cradled it. She made sure I didn't get hurt. And that's all fine and dandy, but she ripped my favorite nighty shorts!

"You did that on purpose!" I gasp.

"I didn't, but I'm not sorry!" she declares.

Her hands go to my waist; and she shoves me a little to try and get me off of her.

I don't budge. I grip her tightly with my thighs, narrow my eyes at her, and yell, "Where are your shorts?"

"You think I'm gonna let you rip them?"

"Give them to me!"

"Over my dead body!"

I don't know why, but she's so close, so beneath me, and warm, and mad, and sexy, and I just kiss her. Hey, her lips were right there. What else was I supposed to do?

She responds immediately, and it lets me know that she was thinking exactly what I was thinking. I mean, she's already told me just today just how hot she thinks I am when I'm mad.

Whether that was just a line or not doesn't bother me at the moment.

I bite her lips gently at first. Then a little harder.

She gasps.

I don't let up. I suck on her lips. I kiss them. I bite some more until she can't breathe anymore. Until she pulls back, practically hyperventilating.

Then I go for her neck.

And she moans and curses.

Then she sits up abruptly, leaving me in her lap.

And she pulls me closer.

I didn't think I could get any closer.

And yet, I still want to be even closer.

She moves her hands a little, squeezing my waist roughly.

I grab them and notice she's still holding her shorts.

She's realizes she's still holding them too. "You're not going to rip my shorts," she pouts stubbornly against my ear.

It literally sends chills up my spine, and a little heat down below. "Forget the shorts, Mami." I whisper in her ear.

She loosens her grip a little, I think it's subconscious on her part, and I'm able to take the shorts away.

I throw them across my room. Because I truly don't care about them at this moment. I take her face in both hands and kiss her with everything I have in me. It's a combination of the way I know she likes to be kissed and the way that feels good to me.

"Oh God." She moans, snatching her lips from mine.

I move up to her ear and bite softly.

She moans again, louder this time before pulling her face away from me.

"Wait, wait, wait." She gasps. "Fuck."

"What?" I pant, just realizing how hard I'm breathing. "What's wrong?"

She lays her head on my chest and exhales slowly before kissing me there.

It feels really good.

"Please say we're off break, baby." She pleads.

I hesitate, tensing up a bit. I'm not ready to be off break.

"Fuck." She breathes and kisses my chest again. "I'm sorry." She apologizes. "I almost"-

"Yeah, but I wanted to." I cut her off, doing a little pleading myself, because I did want her to. And I still want her to.

She shakes her head, face still in my chest. It's driving me crazy and I have the urge to shift my hips a bit, to get a little pressure pressed against me down there; but I'm scared Jade will notice what I'm doing and throw me out of her lap.

"You're a good girl, Vega." She sighs. "You don't do casual out of a relationships sex."

"You don't know that." Yes, I admit it. It comes out as a bit of a whine.

"Do you?" she challenges.

I don't have an answer.

"Have you?" She questions.

I actually do have an answer to that.

"Well, no, but I"-

She shakes her head again. "You're a good girl, Vega. I'm not going to take advantage of you."

I pull her face out of my chest and look her right in the eyes. "It's not taking advantage if I want to."

"I know you want to, but do you really want to do it like this? Us on a break. You not sure if you trust me?"

I understand what she's saying, but I can't help but wonder if it's just an excuse, just a quick line she's throwing out, because she's not willing to go that far for this charade.

"It… it might be worth it." I try. "I think we'd be really good at it."

"I know we will be. Sooo fucking good at it." She shakes her head. "But you want me to prove I love you, right?"

I nod my head.

"This is part of it. When break is over, when you trust me, we can and we will definitely, but until then, no matter how bad I want to, I won't. We can't. Okay?"

"Okay." I surrender, leaning in for one last kiss, but she pulls back.

"Did you hear anything I just said," she practically snarls at me, like she's physically repulsed by me.

"It's just a kiss, Jade." I reply a little defensively, not wanting to show that my feelings are hurt. That she's managed to make me feel so pathetic and disgusting so quickly.

"Get off of me." She demands, pushing a little at me.

"Let me kiss you!" I push back and glare. I don't know why I'm forcing the issue, but I press on anyway. "If you loved me, you'd let me kiss you!"

"No, I wouldn't." She snaps back.

"Fine!" I make to get up, but she pulls me back down.

She wanted me off and now that I'm trying she wants to pull me back?

Ugh!

"Let go!" I demand.

"Vega," she grabs my face. "If I loved you, I'd know that if I let you kiss me, it won't stop there, and I'm not entirely sure I'll be able to stop us from going too far this time. That's why you can't kiss me right now. That's why you need to get off of me, baby."

It's like the most romantic thing I ever heard and I find myself leaning in again.

"Vega…" she warns.

Again I feel stupid, and disgusting, and pathetic. But I cover it up as best as I can.

"Jade, it's just a kiss. Let me prove that you can trust me too." I plead.

She doesn't exactly nod, or give me any other indication that she's agreed to let me kiss her, but she doesn't exactly pull back when I lean in this time.

I kiss her lips softly, and I restrain myself from going any further. I can feel how taught she is beneath me, and I know she's holding her breath. I don't want to push her away, so I keep my promise.

I keep the kiss light and brief.

Then I get up.

I offer her my hand and she takes it. My hands automatically itch to touch more of her, but I don't.

She clears her throat and walks passed me toward my dresser. Then she's pulling out the long sleeve t-shirt and the nighty pants she wants me to wear. "Here, I'm packing these for you to wear tonight."

"Jade," I protest. "I don't want to"-

"And we're not going to argue about it because we don't know how to argue without getting hot and bothered; so here." She hands me the nightwear.

I'm tempted to slap them out of her hand, but I'm tired of that argument, so I take them and put them in my bag.

I give in, like always.

She smiles at me triumphantly, making me want to change my mind. "As soon as Trina gets home, we'll get in my car and head out." She bosses.

And I have time to think about it again. Really think about it. We're planning on spending the night inside of a store! There's no way that's gonna work out for us. We'll get caught for sure. We'll end up in jail. Especially Jade as she's probably on probation.

And then I get to really, reallythinking….

"Jade?"

"What?"

"Why were you on house arrest?"

She frowns at me. "Is this how you change the subject?"

I think about it, and realize we've made a pretty decent jump out loud. She hasn't been able to follow the line of thinking in my head, so it would seem as though my question came out of nowhere. But at the same time, I want an answer.

"Are you avoiding the question?" I challenge.

"No. And you already know what I did."

I do. She got arrested for assaulting Hudson.

"But why?" I ask. "Why did you assault Hudson?"

She shrugs her shoulders. "I met him. He's an ass. And a pervert. I should've killed him." She answers in a way that makes me think she's not just saying she should've killed him as another way of saying she would've hurt him more. She literally wants to kill him.

I panic a little. "Did he do something to you? Was it self-defense? Were the girls with you? Did he" -

"No." She soothes me, placing a gentle hand on my arm. My right arm. The one that isn't bruised. She's always conscious about that. It makes me feel really good for some reason. The fact that she's so attentive, it just feels really good.

"He's an ass." Jade continues. "And I imagined him being that ass to you and it made me mad."

I narrow my eyes at her suspiciously. "That's not the whole story."

"It is. I didn't find out he was such a huge pervert until after I beat the shit out of him."

I stare at her, trying to make her uncomfortable, but she just stares back until I'm the one feeling uncomfortable.

I sigh, giving up. "I'm glad you're not going to jail."

"Me too. Now let's find something to do."

I can't help it. I look at her lips. That's what happened the last time she asked me what I want to do. I ended up kissing her.

"Other than that, Vega." She reprimands me, like I'm some hormonal teenager. Which I kinda am, but still…

We end up watching a few movies on the lifetime channel. I think Jade would rather watch a slasher movie, but wants to distract me more.

It works.

It keeps me occupied all the way until my parents get home.

They greet me at the same time, but Papi comes over for a hug.

It hurts. Bad.

He squeezed my arm. I totally forgot about that stupid bruise.

I sob as quietly as I can; and when he pulls back, I have tears in my eyes.

"What's the matter, m'hija?" He wazzes out a little.

Oh God, if he finds out about my arm, he'll never let me leave the house again.

"Nothing." I lie. "I missed you." But it's really not that much of a lie. I did miss him.

I glance at my mom, who's in the kitchen giving me a concerned look, and if she comes in here too I'll never escape. I see the note on the fridge and a little inspiration hits me. "You didn't even tell me you were leaving," I choke. "You just left a note on the refrigerator."

Definitely gotta thank Sikowitz for the improv lessons one day.

On the downside, my Papi looks horrified, like he truly damaged me. And I feel so guilty, but I can't tell him the truth. If he saw my arm…he….he wouldn't understand.

"Let's go!" Trina suddenly yells, clambering down the stairs in the highest, most needle-thin heels I've ever seen. How can she even walk in those things?

I stop crying instantly.

"How'd you pack so fast?" I ask.

"I've been packed since yesterday. Let's go!" She rushes, heading outside without a backwards glance to see who's following.

I grab my stuff as well. "Bye Mom. Bye Papi." I call brightly.

Then I'm out the door. I kinda went from a sobbing mess to the most peppiest girl in the world, so my dad has a confused look on his face, like he'd been tricked but can't believe it at the same time.

Dang it! I so need to work on following through.

When I get to Jade's car, she and Trina are arguing over who's gonna sit in the passenger seat. Jade wants me to sit up front; and I agree. It should definitely be me as I'm her girlfriend. But arguing with Trina isn't exactly on my to do list today.

"I'll sit in the back." I announce while opening the back door to do just that.

No one looks at me. They're still arguing.

I sigh and squeeze through the front seats before honking the horn.

They both jump.

"Get in the car!" I yell at them as I scoot back to my seat and buckle myself in.

Trina sticks her tongue out at Jade. Jade rolls her eyes at Trina, but they both simultaneously open their doors and get in.

{~~~~O~~~~}

It's supposed to be a forty minute drive to Wanko's, but it seems much longer than that. Jade and Trina argue over everything. Which way to go, what music to listen to, whether the windows should be up or down. Just everything.

I swear I nearly lose my mind.

But we finally get to Wanko's before that can happen, and we meet up with everyone. Everyone. Cat, Robbie, Andre, Beck, Melissa...How are we all gonna be able to pull this off.

Oh my God, we'll get caught for sure; but is anyone freaking out? No. They're all pretending to shop. Pretending to shop!

It's so obvious! We're all going to jail!

Melissa hides first because she can hold her wazz the longest. And I continue to freak out internally. I can't believe we're actually doing this. It's so stupid. We're so gonna get caught. And I think I'm going to faint.

It's so hot in here. Hasn't Wanko ever heard of A.C.?

We hide Trina next. And I just know this is the part where we get caught. She's making such a fuss and we've only got like thirty more minutes before the store closes for the night, and six, six, more people to hide.

We do Robbie next, then Beck, then Andre.

I'm in full fledge panic mode with my adrenaline working against me. I swear my heart is about to pump its way out of my chest. And it hurts so bad.

All too soon, Jade's shoving me into a plastic bin and putting the top on me.

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god...

It's so hot in here.

And I can hear the closing announcements. The guy on the intercom is telling everyone they have five minutes to leave the store.

Oh God, we should leave like the man is telling us to. We should all climb out of our hiding places and just leave. Just follow the law.

And it's so chizzin' hot in here!

Oh God, I'm gonna get caught any second.

And I'm so cramped. But I stay still 'cause I can hear the employees walking around cleaning and stuff.

God this plastic stinks

I can't breathe.

It's so dark in here.

I cannot believe I agreed to do this. I'm so stupid. We're so going to jail. All of us. Every single last one of us. I'm gonna get a record. My Papi's gonna kill me. I'm never-

Suddenly, my plastic tub is lifted off my head and I freeze. This is it. I'm caught. I'm going to jail. I can hear the handcuffs slapping onto my wrists. My poor, poor wrists.

"Why are you still hiding, Vega?"

I let out a nervous laugh. Jade. That's Jade's voice.

We didn't get caught.

We made it. We actually made it.

On shaky legs, I get out of the bin. Jade helps me out, still careful of my arm. Then she leads me to the others and my jaw kinda drops a little.

Everybody is already in pajamas, breaking out snacks and drinks, as if this is some kind of camping trip. I half expect them to build a fire and make smores.

Instead, Cat suggests we play a game.

God, I hope it's not hide and seek.

"Truth or dare?" Andre suggests.

On second thought, I'd love to play hide and seek.

I just know, with this crowd, people are gonna be dared to kiss people. And plus, I can't pick truth, which is what I like to pick whenever I play truth or dare, because what if someone asks me a question about me and Jade's fake love life?

I mean, I won't tell the truth because I pinky promised, but at the same time, I'm a horrible liar.

"What's the forfeit?" Robbie asks. He looks every bit of nervous and I don't blame him. He doesn't peg me for the truth or dare playing type, maybe Rex, but not Robbie.

"What's a forfeit?" Melissa asks.

We all look at her. What kind of truth or dare has she been playing all her life? Who's ever heard of playing without a forfeit?

"A forfeit is something you have to do if you don't want to do the truth or dare given to you, but no one usually picks it because it's usually ten times worse than any truth or dare that is given." Andre explains gently.

"What about drinking toilet water for a forfeit?" Cat suggests.

We all shake our heads. That's nowhere near harsh enough.

Even Trina scoffs, and I know there's no way she'd ever drink toilet water. Not even as a dare.

I look over at my sister, noticing she's in her pajamas, but she's still got her heels on. At first I frown, getting ready to say something to her about it, but then an idea comes to me.

"What if you had to let Trina stand on your hand for a whole minute with those shoes on for a forfeit?" I suggest.

At first, everyone gives me doubtful looks, but then they get a look at the heels on Trina's shoes and squirm uncomfortably. Nobody wants to let that happen to their hand.

"Okay." Everyone agrees, almost in unison, and it seems so loud because I'm still very aware that we're inside of a closed store.

"But wait," Beck says.

We all look at him.

"We should make it so that she has to stand on one foot, putting all of her weight into it. That way we make sure she uses the same amount of pressure for everyone. He looks at me as he says this. And I know he thinks Trina will be biased towards me and not stand on my hand as hard as everyone else's, but he's wrong. Trina kinda likes Beck; it's him who would've gotten the biased treatment.

But everyone agrees to the new terms, me included.

If a person forfeits, Trina has to stand on their hand…with one foot.

Ouch.

"Okay, me first." Melissa calls

Oh crap. It's starting.

"Jade." She says.

I blink at Melissa. She's calling out Jade first?

"Dare." Jade says, not waiting for Melissa to ask which one she wants to do.

"I dare you to kiss Beck."

Seriously?

Everyone goes quiet.

I stop breathing.

Why would she do that?

Jade glares at Melissa. Melissa stares back, waiting, challengingly. Since when does Melissa challenge Jade?

After a minute or two of Jade and Melissa staring at each other, Jade says, "Forfeit." Then she lays her hand out.

I gasp. She's really going to do it. Let Trina stand on her hand with that needle-like heel for 60 seconds. I regret suggesting that forfeit so bad now. I swear, I didn't think anyone would be crazy enough to do it. Not even Jade.

Trina doesn't seem to have a problem with delivering the forfeit. She gets up quickly, almost happily and stands on my girlfriend's hand.

Jade's eyes bug, and she inhales sharply. I think it hurts a lot more than she thought it would.

The seconds go by way too slow. I can't even look at Jade because I feel like this is my fault. I'm the one who suggested this. But then I glare at Melissa too because she's the one who gave Jade a dare she was willing to forfeit. And then I glare at Jade, because she could've just done the dare. She could've just kissed Beck.

I exhale when Trina finally gets off.

Jade shakes her hand out and grimaces.

"There's fucking hole in my hand," she glares at Melissa.

"You could've just kissed him." Melissa shrugs. "I don't think he would've minded."

Jade looks at me.

"I don't think she would've minded either." Melissa adds on. "You two are on a break, right?"

Actually, I kinda would've minded, but if it meant Jade wouldn't have a hole in her hand, I'd let her do it without a second thought. It's just a dare. And even if it wasn't, I'd rather let Jade go back to Beck than let her hurt.

Jade glares at Melissa a little more before announcing that it's her turn. She gives her attention to André. "Truth or dare, André?"

"Truth." He answers immediately.

It's the easier of the two, at least that's what he undoubtedly thinks until Jade asks, "Who was the last girl you thought of as you jacked off?"

Lots of people do spit takes.

Me? I choke, though I haven't had a chance to start on any snacks yet.

Jade pats my back absently, but continues to stare at André.

The look on his face….it looks like he's actually debating on whether or not he should forfeit. But then he mumbles, "Melissa." And it gets awkward in here real quick.

Jade blinks in surprise, but covers it quickly. In fact, she starts to smile, like she'd just been given the best present on earth.

"Melissa who?" Jade asks.

Seriously? Does she have to drag this out? We're all sure of which Melissa it is; otherwise he wouldn't have been so hesitant to name her.

I take a peek at Melissa, to see how she's doing. She seems a hundred percent uncomfortable. Red-faced and unwilling to look at anyone in the eyes. And for a second, I think maybe Jade did this as payback. But then I remember the look of surprise on her face. Unless she was acting surprised, Jade didn't know; she just lucked out.

André clears his throat. "Robbie, truth or dare."

I think he's trying to get the spotlight off of him and I don't blame him.

"Truth," Robbie gulps nervously. But he has nothing to worry about. André asks him when was the last time he wet his pants. Sure it's embarrassing, especially because his answer revealed that he had a recent accident, but considering the first two dares, this one is pretty tame.

And so are the next few.

Robbie dares Trina to eat a whole jar of mashed peas in the baby food section, Trina truths Cat into admitting she has a tiny crush on Robbie, Cat dares me to paint my neck purple, and I truth Melissa into admitting that she just might have feelings of the romantic sort toward André.

I regret it as soon as it's over. Sure, I made my friend, André, feel better about his earlier declaration, but now it's Melissa's turn to truth or dare someone.

"Jade." She smiles. Kind of evilly. And I already know what's coming. I can feel it in my bones.

So can everyone else because they hold their breaths.

And so can Jade because she glares at Melissa.

"Dare," she picks.

"You can pick truth, you know." Melissa sing-songs.

"Dare." Jade repeats

"Fine. I dare you to kiss Beck."

Seriously? I mean, I knew it was coming. I felt it was coming. But still….

"Forfeit." Comes Jade's reply.

"Wait." I say.

Jade ignores me and puts her hand out.

Trina hops up eagerly.

It wazzes me off.

"Stop!" I snatch up my girlfriend's hand. "It's just a dare, Jade. Just kiss him!"

"Shut up, Vega." She snatches her hand back from me and lays it back down.

I make to grab it up again but she snatches it out of my way. And the look she gives me. It's the same look she gave me when I asked for a break. It's the same look she gave me when she told me that I was a slut.

It hurts. That look hurts me.

But it doesn't make me stop loving her.

I sit on my hands to show her that I won't try to stop her anymore, but I close my eyes 'cause I can't watch.

"Let's go, Other Vega!" I hear Jade yell.

And when sixty seconds are up, I open my eyes.

Jade's shaking out her hand. Everyone is exhaling in relief. Except for Beck. He looks absolutely crushed. Since I know what it's like to love Jade, I sympathize with him completely. It's no fun watching bad stuff happen to her. Even if she chooses for it to happen.

"Vega," Jade nudges me. I'm kinda mad at her, so I have every intention of ignoring her, but then she says, "Truth or dare." And I know I can't ignore her. I have to answer.

But I don't know what to say.

If I pick truth, what will she ask me to reveal?

If I pick dare, what will she ask me to do?

In the end, I decide on truth. I don't trust her not to dare me to end break. That sounds like something she would definitely do.

"When did you first realize you were in love with me, and how did you know?" She asks.

I stare at her, wondering why she asked me that. Wondering what kind of answer she's wanting from me. Does she expect me to make up an answer? Or is she asking for the truth? And as I begin to shift through my memories, I realize I can't tell the truth.

It would make me seem even more pathetic than she already thinks of me.

Because it was early in. So early in that the "deal" was still new. So new that Beck thought Jade was blackmailing me into being her girlfriend. In fact, he came out and asked me, point blank.

I was so upset afterward. At him for being so adamant about us faking, and with myself because I realized I didn't want our act to end. I didn't want Jade to go back to hating me. I wanted her to keep calling me babe, to keep acting concerned for me when I was hurt, to keep being the girlfriend Jade, and never return to the Jade I met on my first day at Hollywood Arts.

So, I kinda just put my feelings in a box and tried my best not to let them grow. But that didn't work. Because after a while I forgot. I forgot we were faking and I just let myself love her. As if it was a natural thing for me to do.

As if I was allowed.

"Baby?" Jade nudges me to get my attention and remind me that she asked me a question. One I'm expected to answer in front of everyone. In front of Beck.

I can't.

"I don't know." I shrug casually. Hoping she would let me slide with that.

"You know, baby." She coaxes softly, but firmly.

I sigh and look at my fingernails.

"When you were in detention"-

"Be more specific. I get detention a lot." Jade cuts in.

My face reddens a little. Be specific? Like tell her what she was in detention for? Because if I remember correctly, it was for the time she stretched my legs in the janitor's closet and had everyone convinced that we'd splunked each other.

I don't want to say that! So, I don't. I take the coward's way out.

"Beck asked me if you were blackmailing me into being your girlfriend." I admit. "He didn't believe we were dating and thought you were just trying to make him jealous. It made me mad. We'd been dating for less than two weeks and I didn't know if I was a rebound or whatever, but the thought of you leaving me to go back to him hurt me." I admit as casually as I can. I even shrug my shoulders as if I'm over it and it's no big deal.

But then I mess it up when I add on, "it hurt really bad," softly, and to myself.

I can feel everyone staring at me. I can feel Jade's stare the most. So, I try to direct the attention away from myself. "Trina, truth or dare?"

Half of me wants her to pick dare so I can make her drink toilet water. I know it's not right to want to punish her. It's not her fault she's the forfeit enforcer. It's mine, but does she have to act so happy and eager to hurt Jade?

"Truth," my sister says.

I make her tell everyone about how she actually has practice dates so that she'll finally be prepared whenever she gets a real one.

From there, the game goes on. I can't seem to concentrate on it because I'm avoiding looking beside me, to my left, because that's where Jade's sitting. And I can't look in front of me because that's where Beck is. So, I kinda just watch my hands, all the while I'm painfully aware of Jade's constant gaze on me.

And I wonder if Beck is staring daggers at me for snitching on him?

Suddenly, I hear Cat ask Melissa to pick truth or dare.

I pick my head up then and everyone else groans 'cause we all know what's coming.

"Whatty?" Cat pouts.

"Jade," Melissa smiles.

"Oops," Cat slaps at her forehead, a little too hard if you ask me, but somehow not nearly hard enough at the same time.

"Dare," Jade says, again she doesn't give Melissa time to ask the full question.

"I dare you to kiss"-

"Forfeit." Jade says, and just like that, she puts her hand out for Trina to step on.

Trina hesitates. Actually hesitates.

That's saying something.

"I'll kiss him." I volunteer.

"It's not your dare!" Jade yells at me.

"Can't there be substitutes or something?" I ignore her.

"No!" Jade yells at me again,

I turn to my friend. My soon to be ex friend.

"Lissa!" I glare/plead.

"Icky!"

"Stop it!"

"It's not me," she shrugs up her shoulders as if this really isn't her fault. "She doesn't have to keep forfeiting." She points at Jade. "She can kiss him. You two are on a break. Tell her you don't mind."

But I do mind. I mind so much that I made Jade pinky promise not to date Beck while we're on break. Is that why she's refusing to kiss him? Because she pinky promised. If so, that makes no sense. This is just a dare; it's not the same as her dating him.

"Jade, I really don't mind." I turn to Jade, pleadingly. "You can kiss him. I want you to."

"You want me to?" Jade's glare is so harsh that I gasp. "What about what I want? I don't want to kiss him. I'm not going to kiss him. If I could get what I want, we wouldn't be on this fucking break!" Then Jade looks away from me and over at my sister. "Let's go, Other Vega!" She calls impatiently

Trina obediently stands on Jade's hand. And I think she's nervous or something because she loses her balance…while she's standing on Jade's hand.

"Fuck!" Jade grunts.

Without even thinking about it, I put my hand on Jade's thigh, and I lean into her. "It's okay, Mami. Just forty more seconds," I whisper before kissing her ear.

Jade inhales sharply.

I think it's because I'm irritating her, so I make to move my hand off of her thigh.

"Stay." She grunts.

And I have no doubt she's talking to me. I mean, she's definitely not talking to Trina.

I squeeze her thigh, trying to comfort her while simultaneously whispering encouragements into her ear.

When Trina finally steps off of Jade's hand, I swear I see a tear in her eye. Not Trina's, Jade's. I don't remember ever seeing Jade cry before.

I don't think I wanna play this anymore.

But we keep on. We go around, and around, and it seems everyone is trying to avoid giving Melissa a turn, but eventually, we have to. It's actually Jade who does, which surprises everyone.

"Redhead." Jade calls.

"Truth," Melissa says.

Jade doesn't think for a second. It's like she already knew Melissa would pick truth, and she already chose what secret she wanted her to reveal. "If you could date any girl here, who would it be?"

I tense up, getting ready for a fight. Jade always acts jealous of Melissa, like she thinks me and Melissa might like each other in that way; even though I've told Jade a million times we're just friends. But seriously, out of me, Trina, Jade, and Cat, of course Melissa's gonna pick me.

Jade just wants to have an argument.

"Cat." Melissa yawns.

At first, I think I heard wrong; but then Cat giggles out a, "me?" and I realize she really did pick Cat. I suddenly find myself a little jealous. I mean, it's not like I want Melissa to date me, it's just, how could she chose Cat over me? She's Cat!

"Hey, what about me?" I ask, unable to keep it in.

"What about you?"

"You wouldn't want to date me?"

Lissa sighs. "We've been over this. You're boring."

"I am not."

"I think you are." She shrugs.

I fume, crossing my arms over my chest.

"You're making your girlfriend jealous." She points to Jade beside me.

"I …" I close my mouth, there's really no way to get out of that one cleanly. I also refuse to look at Jade. I've had enough of her glares for one day.

"Your turn Redhead," I hear her say after a very long moment of silence.

Everyone looks at Melissa warily.

"Jade," She smiles

Everyone groans.

Jade says dare. And holds out her hand, already knowing what's coming.

"Not so fast." Lissa sings.

Jade scowls, leaving her hand right where it is. "There isn't a limit to forfeits."

"I wasn't going to say there was, but you might want to do this dare."

I breathe a little easier; because that must mean Melissa's gonna dare Jade to do something different, right?

Jade still leaves her hand in front of her, not trusting Melissa one bit.

"I dare you to think about how you feel about Tori, and then kiss her accordingly." Melissa says, but it's the weirdest thing. She looks at Beck when she says it.

My face heats up.

Jade hates me. I think. So that'll be a peck to my cheek.

Or if she really wants to splunk me, we'll probably end up having one of those heavy make out sessions that almost turn into sex in front of everyone!

"I can forfeit if you want, Vega." I hear beside me.

I look over at Jade. "What?"

"You look like you're about to faint." She explains. "I can forfeit if you want." She puts her hand down. As if she's really about to do it. To forfeit.

"No!" I exclaim. "It's fine, Jade."

"You sure?"

I nod my head.

She moves from beside me, scooching over on her knees until she's sitting in front of me. Then she leans in slowly, hesitantly. Like she's giving me time to change my mind. And as embarrassing as this could turn out to be, the thought of Trina hurting her hand again makes me sick. Literally just turns my stomach. So, I keep still, but my eyes wander around because I'm nervous and uncomfortable with this. .

"Baby, look at me." Jade commands.

I blink a little and focus on her eyes.

Jade smiles softly at me.

I give her a small smile in return.

She grabs both of my hands, her thumbs caressing the backs gently, though her grip is firm. Then she turns my left hand over and places the gentlest kiss to the inside of my wrist.

I feel really stupid because of the insane amount of pleasure that little act caused me, and the fact that I couldn't hide it. I literally shudder.

She looks up at me, taking in the discomfort on my face and I drop her gaze, my face heating up in embarrassment. Then she grabs my face in one hand, my wrist still in the other.

"Hey," she whispers. I look back at her. Right into her eyes. "Close your eyes." She commands.

I do it. Not right away, but it seems like a good idea when I think it over.

As soon as my eyes close, I feel her hand move from my face down to my waist. The other hand, the one that was holding my wrist, joins it quickly. Then her lips are pressed to my eyelids, one after the other.

It feels really good. Gentle and soft. Loving, but firm. Like she really means it.

My cheeks are next. Soft, firm, gentle kisses.

Then my nose. Then my chin.

Then my lips.

Finally, she presses her lips to mine, and I part my lips slightly so she can enter whenever she wants to.

She doesn't.

Maybe she plans on it, but she's moving too slow for me. She kisses and kisses. Occasionally pushing a bottom, or top, lip of hers in my mouth so I'll have something to latch on to. But I grow tired of that after a while. I want more of her.

I'll always want more of her.

And I forget this is her dare. That she's supposed to be kissing me.

I bite her. Softly at first, just to let her know what's coming. I've learned that if I bite Jade out of the blue, it catches her off guard and she kinda doesn't like it too much. But if she knows…if she can prepare for it, if she's already…excited, or in "the mood," she likes it a whole lot.

I tug at her waist, and she ends up in my lap. It's a very familiar feeling that I don't realize I haven't felt in a while.

Her hands go to my shoulders, for balance, and she squeezes them in a way that doesn't necessarily suggest all she wants is balance.

My hands go to her bottom, for…I guess I can say balance. To make sure she's not going to slide off; but really, I just like the way her butt feels in my hands. And as testament to that, my hands squeeze, not too gently, of their own accord.

I swear, these paws have a mind of their own sometimes.

Jade gasps a little, and I bite her harder, pull her closer.

Then she moans, and for some reason, it seems really, really, loud. So, instead of laying her down on her back and climbing on top, I freeze. Suddenly realizing why she sounded so loud.

It's because subconsciously, I know we're not alone. We're in a warehouse, playing truth or dare with other people.

My eyes spring open and I see them. My, our friends. Melissa, Cat, Trina, Robbie, Beck and André. They're all staring at us with their jaws in their laps.

My face heats up immediately, and I pull back a little. My face still pretty close to Jade's. "Um, Jade?"

"You have to use the bathroom, don't you?" She whispers back.

I don't really. But a bathroom break sounds like a very good idea.

I nod my head.

"Please say we're off break so I can come too." She says using a pleading tone that tickles my ears, and other parts of my body.

My mind goes straight to the gutter.

I mean, I actually consider it. Not just to see if she'd actually let me…uh…do that to her, but because I really want to do it. To mark her, and claim her. I could make her feel good, maybe even get her to forget about Beck.

"Fuck." She whispers, drawing my attention. "I've got to stop letting you do this to me."

My heart drops a little. It's obvious she wants me to stop touching her, but I ask," What?" anyway.

"Giving me blue balls." She answers.

"Jade!" I hiss. She's so loud.

"Metaphorically."

She gives me a quick kiss and climbs out of my lap. Fixing her clothes back.

"Well, go wazz." She commands when she notices I'm just staring.

I get up quickly, noting again just how not alone we are. And I feel my face heat up again.

"I'll come with." I hear Melissa say behind me.

I expect to hear Jade abject, but she doesn't. So I turn around and give her a quick peek. She's scowling at Melissa, but otherwise doesn't seem very inclined to say anything.

It's a small relief, but it's also weird at the same time. Makes me feel like I'm missing something.

Suddenly, Melissa grabs my hand and marches me into the bathroom. Like I'm in trouble or something. But I didn't do anything wrong, so when she pushes me in and shuts the bathroom door behind us, I glare at her. "What?"

"So, what's your excuse now?" she glares back at me.

I have no idea of what she's talking about, so of course I ask her to elaborate.

"For your break, Icky. Why are you still on break? You said she doesn't love you, but that's clearly not the case!"

"What makes you think that?" I frown.

"Please," she scoffs, rolling her eyes at me. "She wouldn't even kiss Beck as a dare."

Okay, I'll get back to what that's supposed to prove in a minute, but right now I've been reminded of some chewing out I want to do.

"Why'd you keep doing that?!" I yell. "I know you and Jade don't get along, but that was"-

"Two reasons, Icky." She interrupts me. "One, to prove a point, and not to Jade,"-

"What?"

"And two," she continues as if I never interrupted her interruption of me. "Because I had to make sure that psycho really loved you before I moved in with her. Now I'm a hundred percent sure she won't kill me in my sleep because she's not going to do anything to upset you."

Wait, what? Lissa's moving in with Jade? Since when?

"B-but…" I stutter; none of the million questions I want to ask seem to want to make it past my lips.

"Oh, right." She snaps. "I forgot to tell you. I'm moving in with Jade."

I still have a million questions, but all I can get out is, "why?"

"It's a long story, Icky. The short version is my family is moving away and I asked if I could stay here instead of going with them."

"But…but"-

"Why am I staying with Jade of all people?" She asks herself for me, since I can't seem to form the words.

I nod my head, letting her know that's definitely a question I want answered.

"Well, she offered."

I blink in surprise.

"I know right." She agrees with me. "And then I thought about it and decided it would be better than trying to crash at your place. You know, since roomies often get on each other's' nerves and destroy their friendships. I thought since me and Jade already don't get along, there'd be no love lost there." She shrugs.

Like it's okay.

Like what she said made any chizzin' sense at all.

"But"- I begin, ready to protest.

"Look," she cuts me off. "The point is that I'm staying. But in order to stay, I have to be roomies with your girlfriend. Which is why I had to make sure she made that offer because she really loves you. And she just proved it to me."

Seriously?

I inhale sharply. "How did Trina standing on her hand prove anything?!" I yell.

Melissa flicks my forehead.

"Ow!" I complain.

"She loves you, idiot. She's doing everything in her power to make sure she doesn't hurt you the way she did when she called you a…uh…that name that she called you." She falters.

"She told you about that?" I ask. My voice is super small.

I don't know if I'm upset because Jade told somebody about that, or if it's because she had a heart-to-heart with my best friend, or if it's because they're gonna be roomies while I had no idea Melissa was in danger of moving in the first place, but I am upset.

"Yeah, she told me." Melissa nods her head as confirmation. "And it was bad, Icky. I agree with you there. But the way you're handling it…" She shakes her head at me, all disappointed like.

"What?" I ask defensively.

"You may not be a cutter, but purposely getting 40 pound balls of steel thrown at you?"

The accusing tone in her voice makes me bristle. "I don't just have balls thrown at me. I weave through them. It's just a game."

"It's just a game?"

"Yeah."

She pulls up my sleeve, exposing my bruised arm. "And how many times to you have to lose before you start to look like this!" she hisses at me. Angrily. Like it's her arm that looks like this and not mine. "How many times do you have to lose before you've had enough?"

I just pull my sleeve down because I can't answer her. Truth is, I never quit. I never have enough. I just keep playing until the Gorilla Club closes.

"Look, Icky." Melissa sighs. "I don't get you and Scissor Queen. I'm not even going to pretend to get you two. In fact, I don't think I ever want to get you two; but I thought Jade was the bully in this relationship."

I scrunch up my face in confusion. The bully? And if Jade's not "the bully" then does that mean she's referring to me? That she now thinks I'm "the bully? It can't be.

"Meaning," she continues because of the look I'm giving her. "Jade's the bossy and loud one in public; but it's obvious to me, and everyone else, that you're the one holding the cards. You're the boss. You're in charge. Jade's kissing your ass so you guys can end break, and you let her until she asks to be with you, and that's when you pull back and let her fall on her ass. Which is truly janked up. If you want to be on a break, be on a break. Be on a real break. If not, then stop stringing her along like this because it makes you look like a "-

"Slut?" I interrupt.

"No," She sighs. "A bitch. It makes you look like a bitch, Tori."

And with that, she leaves me behind. And as much as I'd love to roll my eyes at her dramatic exit, I can't help but focus on her last words.

A bitch? Me? But Jade's the one who…who…seemingly made a mistake and is trying to make up for it while I string her along, like Lissa said. And Of course that's not what's happening, but nobody knows what's really going on. Nobody knows that me and Jade were never a real couple to begin with. Nobody knows that I fell in love with a girl who's only pretending to love me. Nobody knows that when I asked for a break, Jade granted it, but then told me that when we get back together, and everyone thinks we're a happy couple again, she's gonna break up with me in front of the whole school. Nobody knows that she said she's gonna make sure everyone knows just how much of a lying slut I am.

Nobody knows any of that. So of course I look like the bad guy. The bitch.

And for the briefest of seconds, I wonder if Jade did that on purpose. I wonder if she knew I'd look like the Villain. If she meant to turn my friends against me. I mean, Melissa siding with Jade? How does that happen?

But then again, how could Jade know I would behave like this? So, this wasn't intentional. It's just happening.

And Melissa's right. It needs to stop. Not only because I don't want to look like the bitch, but because I'm tired of it. I'm tired of faking. I'm tired of wondering if Jade's faking. I just want to be real. I need to be on a real break. And if Jade wants to break up with me while we're on break, she can, but I will not end break, just to pretend like everything's good between us.

I sigh, and head back to everybody.

But I can't seem to make eye contact with any of my friends. Do they see me as the bitch who's stringing Jade West along?

More than likely.

I keep my head down; only looking up occasionally to make sure I don't trip over anything. Then I sit next to Jade, leaning against her and propping my head on her shoulder.

Tomorrow. I'll tell Jade about us being on a real break tomorrow.

Almost immediately one of her arms finds its way around my waist. "What's the matter, baby?"

"I'm tired." I whisper. It's not really a lie.

I watch her check the time on her phone. It's only 10:30 and I expect her to tease me about it, but I don't really care.

"Me and Vega are going to bed," she announces. You guys are welcome to keep playing without us." And with that, she stands to her feet.

I don't follow immediately, so she helps me up. And I let her.

"I made us a little fort to sleep in over there." She points a little ways off.

I look in the direction she's pointing and smile. It's a cute fort. Like something me and Trina would've made when we were younger. Except we used brooms and our dresser to keep it up, instead of the bins Jade used.

Jade grabs my hand, but before I let her pull me away, I say goodnight to everyone, trying to get up the courage to look my friends in the eyes. They seem to be looking at me the same way they did before, except Melissa. She's staring daggers at me right now, and I know it's because she thinks I've decided to keep "stringing Jade along." But it's just for tonight. It's not "bitchy" of me to want one more night, right?

"What was that all about?" Jade asks on our way to the fort.

"What?"

"The evil eye from Redhead."

"I didn't see it." I lie. I think she knows I'm lying too because she just stops and stares at me.

There's nothing for me to do but change the subject. "So, where's the entrance?" I ask. Though I can see it clear as day.

"That big hole." She deadpans, not even bothering to point at said big hole.

"Oh. Makes sense." I say before crawling in.

It's a lot more spacious inside than what it looks from the outside.

I crawl over to one side, and turn over to face Jade. She has a lot of space, and I scoot over a bit, so that she won't. So that even if she's mad at me, she has to sleep close to me.

"Scoot over, Vega." Jade sighs.

"You have enough room." I insist, patting the very narrow space beside me.

She rolls her eyes before hesitantly lying next to me, but as far away as she can get. She's practically out the door.

"You mad at me?" I ask, bluntly.

She shakes her head. "More like I don't trust you to keep your hands to yourself."

"You don't want me to touch you?" It's meant to be playful teasing, but I can't help it. I sound hurt. I am hurt. It's like I'm the tempting slut bitch and Jade is the victim girlfriend who's just trying to do right by me.

Jade closes her eyes. "Go to sleep, baby."

I've been dismissed. It makes me feel three different kinds of lonely. And suddenly I just want to feel connected. I just want to feel not-alone. If only for this one night. Especially because this is our last night together before the real break begins.

"Jade?" I croak.

"What?" She doesn't even open her eyes.

I scoot in a little closer. "Can I touch you?"

At that, her eyes shoot open and she sits up. Eyeing me warily. Because I put her on edge. The slut bitch who's constantly stringing her along.

I reach out slowly, watching the way she watches my hand as I grab hers in mine and gently rub the spot Trina stepped on for an accumulative 180 seconds.

"This is okay, right?" I ask.

"It's fine." she concedes before laying back down next to me. She's still leaving a bit of space, but it's okay. I rub her hand as she lays there with her eyes closed, pretending to sleep. And I'm still rubbing her hand when she actually falls asleep.

It's then that I realize I can't do it. I can't put her on a regular break. Not face to face. I'll cave, or I won't be able to get the words out and just change my mind. Or she'll kill me.

So I decide to do a very unforgivable thing. Text it to her.

Reluctantly, I let go of her hand and pull up my phone. I take a deep breath and type up the first few words. "Dear, Jade." but immediately, I decide that sounds elementary. So I erase that and start over. "Hey, Mami." But that sounds wrong too. Like I'm being flirty and fun, but this isn't a flirty and fun message, so I erase that too and put Jade. Just jade. That seems to work just fine. So I leave it and move on to the next part. "I think." No, that sounds too indecisive. I erase that and think for a few minutes. "We need a real break." I decide on. It's quick, firm, and to the point. I continue. "We need real space. You shouldn't call me baby, or hug me, or kiss me,"

Before continuing, I read what I have and decide telling her what she shouldn't do, will make her think I'm not sure of what I want, that I'm wishy washy, or that she has a choice in the matter. But at the same time, just writing, "Don't hug me, don't kiss me, etc.", sounds way too harsh.

I stick my thumb nail in my mouth and think about it for a second before deciding on a simple solution. Saying please. "Please don't hug me. Please don't kiss me," and so on, and so on.

It works.

So I continue. "And you can date Beck or whatever if you want. Just forget the pinky promise thing. It's no big deal. You break pinky promises anyway."

As soon as the last sentence is done, I erase it. It sounds way too harsh. Like I'm being vindictive. This isn't a vindictive message. I'm just letting her go is all.

I glance at the time real quick and note that an hour has passed. An hour! It took one whole hour to type 53 words.

Pathetic.

Beside me, Jade's eyes spring open abruptly and she sits up. "Vega!" she gasps.

I guiltily try to hide my phone. But she doesn't demand to see what I'm hiding. And I almost believe she doesn't know anything about my new breakup plan until she pulls me to her and says, "Don't leave me."

I freeze up on her. There's no way she knows what I wrote and am going to send her, right? She was asleep.

"I...uh, Jade?" I question cautiously.

"Don't." She mumbles, while holding me painfully tight.

I've learned not to squirm when she holds me like this. It only makes it worse. So I try my best to relax into it.

"Jade?" I question again once she relaxes a few minutes later. But I think she's asleep. She doesn't answer, and her breathing is slow and even.

Maybe she just had a nightmare and was sleep talking. Well, maybe not a nightmare. Because if she had a dream featuring me leaving her, it wouldn't really be a nightmare for her, right? She wouldn't really be that upset.

I sigh. It would be nice though. If the thought of losing me gave her nightmares. If she really loved me. But the "what if" game is giving me a headache so I try to think about something else.

I lay down next to her, attempting to get some sleep, but it's no use. Not because I'm not tired, because I'm super exhausted, but because if this is my last time sleeping next to Jade, how can I sleep it away?

So, I take the opportunity to stare at her, all night. Like a creeper. I touch too. Her face and hair. Her arms and hands too. God, she's soft.

She stirs a few times, but she doesn't wake. And that gives me the courage to tell her I love her and that I'm sorry for messing up her plans.

Of course she doesn't answer back.

{~~~~O~~~~}

Suddenly my alarm, and everyone else's, goes off and I realize I fell asleep. I don't even have time to be saddened by the fact that I missed time with Jade because we're all rushing to clean up our makeshift beds and forts. Plus we have to hide before the store opens.

Soon enough, I find myself stashed into bin again; waiting for a few customers so stream in so I can pop out and act like I just got here too.

I don't have to wait long. I can hear the customers storm in. God, it sounds like there are a million of them.

I get out of my bin, and before I'm fully out, this old lady snatches my bin up, glaring at me like she expects me to fight her over it. Since I have no desire to do so, I let it go. No problem, but I smile a little, thinking about what Jade would do. Even if she didn't want the bin, she'd fight the old lady over, just because she can.

At the thought of Jade, I'm reminded that I'm supposed to be sending her that text I wrote.

And I get nervous.

And it's like my phone is conspiring against me because at this very moment I get a text from Jade. She's telling me to hurry up and get my stuff. She's at the register already.

That's when I remember, we rode together. There's no way I can send her the text and then ride with her all the way home. It's like an hour drive!

I text Jade back, telling her I have to use the bathroom and I'll meet her at her car.

I call a cab, and they tell me there should be a couple in the vicinity and my ride will be there immediately. I'm guessing they were expecting people to need rides after the sale.

I try my best to sneak past all of my friends, but I came with too many people. I can't dodge them all.

Melissa spots me and waves me over.

I have a feeling she wants to chew me out for continuing to "string Jade along" last night, and while I'm really not in the mood for it, I just don't think avoiding her is a good idea. That girl is a little unpredictable.

"So?" She asks when I get to her.

I sigh and pull out my phone, showing her the text.

She reads it quickly. Then she gasps and pulls me toward the front door by my arm.

Jade spots us, and her eyes narrow, but I just give her a little wave and hope she doesn't follow.

"Are you crazy?!" Lissa shouts once we're outside and barely out of earshot. "You can't break up with that psycho using a text like this, Icky!"

"I can't do it face to face either, Lissa!" I hiss.

She shakes her head at me and opens her mouth, no doubt about to chew me out even more, but I interrupt her.

"I know you think I'm the bitch that's stringing her along!" I yell, almost hysterically. "But I can't do it, Lissa! I tried it before. You know what happened?"

She blinks. If she was gonna respond, I don't give her the room to.

"She yelled at me, and pleaded with me to let her still act like my girlfriend until I gave in. Until I was just a sobbing mess in her lap."

I clasp my hands together, trembling from the memory. I was mad at her. I was so mad at her that I wasn't going to talk to her, or look at her, ever again. And all it took was for her to apologize, give me a sob story, and ask me, ask me if she could still hold me, and call me baby, and touch me. And that was it. I caved. I freakin' melted.

"But I can't let that happen this time." I say quietly, more to myself than to Melissa 'cause I kinda zoned out and forgot she was here. But she touches my arm and my eyes meet hers. "I just need to get my resolve, please. You're supposed to be my friend. Help me. Or at least try to understand." I beg.

"Okay," she nods sincerely, taking my hand in hers. "I'll help."

She leads me over to her car and opens the passenger door for me. I get in gratefully. I know she agreed to help me, but I didn't' know she planned on getting this involved.

She gets in as well and starts up her car.

We ride in silence for about five minutes before she says, "Go ahead and send the text. Jade's probably wondering where you are."

I do it.

Almost immediately, Jade calls me.

I don't answer.

I can't.

After a few minutes of that, she texts me. There's a lot of swearing, but she mostly asks me what's going on. And when I don't answer those, she sends some that let me know she's coming to my house.

Crap!

"You're gonna have to speed up." I tell Melissa, somewhat panicked. I know how Jade drives when she really wants to get somewhere, and at that rate Melissa's going, Jade will probably catch up and pass us. Even with our head start.

Melissa speeds up a little, but not nearly fast enough. I feel like Jade's right behind us.

I bite my nails the rest of the ride home and practically jump out of Lissa's car when we get in front of my house.

She doesn't make to get out though.

"Aren't you coming in with me?" I ask.

She shakes her head. "I still have some packing to do."

I narrow my eyes at her. "You wouldn't even if you could." I accuse.

"Of course not," she winks at me before leaving.

I can't be mad at her; she didn't get me into this mess.

I did.

Then I see Jade pull up. Oh My God!

I run to the house as fast as I can. Why I'm running from the love of my life? I don't know, but I just do. I hear the car door slam behind me, just as I get the key in the lock. I can't let her catch me. If she does, it's over. It's so over.

"Vega!" I hear.

Oh my God, turn stupid key. Turn!

It does and I refuse to look back as I yank the door open and run upstairs.

"Vega, get your ass back here!"

God she sounds so close. I run faster, my adrenaline pumping as if I'm running from a masked murderer and not the girl I love.

I throw myself into my room and shut and lock my door. Mere seconds later, I feel Jade trying the knob.

That was so close!

Vega!" She yells, pounding my door. "Vega! Open the door."

"What do you want?!" I yell back. Knowing full well she has every intention of killing me dead.

She pounds the door. "Open the door! We need to talk!"

"We can talk through the door." I yell back.

"Vega!"

I don't answer.

She goes silent. And I get suspicious.

I didn't hear her stomp away.

I look down at the door and notice a slight jiggle, like she's trying to jimmy the lock.

And maybe she is. In fact, more than likely she is! Oh, god whaddo I do?!

Dresser, I can block the door with my dresser.

I use my shoulder to push it, and I push really hard because I know it's a heavy dresser, but I forgot about my arm. It hasn't been hurting constantly, so I thought nothing of it as I pushed it against my dresser.

Oh God, the pain.

I cry out loudly before clamping a hand over my mouth. Not wanting Jade to hear me.

But she does.

"Vega?" She says. I can hear the change in her tone. I can hear the concern. "Vega, what are you doing in there?"

"Ow." I sob. Then I clear my throat. "Nothing," I try to say without the sob this time.

I fail.

"You sound like you're crying." She jiggles the knob some more.

"I'm not." I whinper.

"Baby, open the door."

I'm so tempted to do it. It's her voice. And that term of endearment she uses for me. It makes me want to run into her arms and let her hug and kiss me. But I can't do that. I can't do that anymore until I'm sure she loves me. Until I'm sure she's not acting anymore.

I take a deep breath. "Please don't call me that, Jade."

"Vega…" she starts to sound annoyed.

I don't answer.

"You can't do this. You can't be fine with me one minute and then all of a sudden not want anything to do with me without telling me what happened. What did I do wrong?"

"You didn't do anything wrong, you're perfect, Jade. I love you."

"I love"-

"But I don't believe you when you say it!" I yell before she can finish. "So we just need to take a real break until we can figure things out."

"How the hell am I supposed to prove I love you over a break in which I'm not supposed to treat you the way I feel about you?" She scoffs.

"Breaks are not for proving how much you love someone. They're for seeing what else is out there. Exploring all your options and then coming back if you couldn't find anything better."

Okay, that totally came out wrong. I know what I'm trying to say, but it just won't come out in a pretty, and articulate, way.

Apparently Jade agrees because she goes silent. Not a contemplative kind of silent, but an angry one. I can just feel it.

"Baby, you've got five seconds to open this door or I'll call Papa Vega up and tell him about your arm." She threatens.

See?

God I hops she's bluffing.

"One…" she counts.

I panic a little.

"Two…"

The last time she threatened to call my father, she actually did it.

"Three…"

I better not chance it.

"Four…"

I open the door.

I hold my arm and stare at her, wondering what she's going to do now.

She stares back for a second before coming into my room and shutting the door.

"Give me your arm," she commands softly.

Like always, I comply.

She pulls the sleeve up and investigates it for a few seconds.

"What happened?"

"I bumped it on my dresser." I answer shortly. She looks up at me with narrowed eyes. "Accidentally." I clarify.

She looks back down at my arm. "What did she say to you, baby?"

My brows dip in confusion. "Who?"

"Redhead."

More dipping of my eyebrows. "When?"

"In the bathroom, last night. You were just fine and then you went to the bathroom with Redhead, and when you came back out you were acting weird."

I sigh. I could refuse to tell her, but then, Lissa's about to be her roommate. She could get the information from her. Something tells me Jade will find a way to make her talk.

Might as well get it over with now.

"I don't want to be the bitch." I admit.

Jade's eyes widen. "She called you a bitch?"

I shake my head. "No, not like that. It's just…"

"It's just what?"

"I look like a bitch. The way I'm always trying to get you to splunk me, but I won't end break. It makes me look like a bitch." I answer. "Lissa pointed that out to me, and I agree with her. We either need to be on a real break, or we need to end break, and since I'm not ready to end break…" I shrug my shoulders.

"That's it?" Jade's stare is super intense. "That's all this is? You feel like you're leading me on and it's making you look bad?"

"Isn't that what it looks like?" I ask. "Don't you think everyone thinks"-

She grabs a hold of my face with both hands. "I don't give a fuck what everyone thinks. This isn't their relationship. It's mine and yours. Okay?"

I nod my head. "Okay." I agree.

"We good?" she asks.

I nod my head again.

I give in.

I cave.

Already.

"Okay, I'll see you at school tomorrow," she kisses me and then she leaves, claiming she has errands to run and things to do.

I can't help but wonder if she would've cancelled her "plans" if I had been difficult. If it would've taken all night to get me to agree with her.

Ugh.

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow I'll do it right. Tomorrow I'll ward off her advances. Tomorrow I won't let her trap me in a closet and beg with me and plead with me until I'm in her lap, crying against her shoulder. I won't let her do that.

I won't.

I have to be strong.

I will be strong.

When I see her, I'll say, "Hello, Jade."

That's it.

If she tries to touch me, I'll snatch away from her and say, "We're on a break."

If she calls me baby, I'll say, "Please don't call me that." Even if we're in front all of my friends. I don't want to embarrass her, or have a power struggle in front of them, but I have to. I have to. And if she absolutely insists on calling me baby, I'll ignore her.

When we get to Sikowitz's class I'll sit in front of Melissa, so she can't sit behind me.

When it's lunch time, I'll get in my car and drive off to eat somewhere else.

I can do this.

I can.

I can!

I will.

But the thought makes me feel anxious. I start to pace my room, driving myself absolutely crazy.

I need to do something that'll take my mind off of this.

Like go to the gorilla club. Even though my arm is killing me, and it's still kinda early, the need to go to the gorilla club starts to overwhelm me.

I think it's because I know I can't actually go. I pinky promised Jade I wouldn't. And even though Jade broke her pinky promise never to call me a slut, I can't bring myself to break a pinky promise too.

So I decide to take a nap instead.

Only I'm too wired up to sleep.

I go to the bathroom and get a couple of Tylenol .

I'm out within a few minutes, and I manage to sleep a good while. I don't wake up again until about 4 in the evening, And considering it was still morning when I took my nap, I'll say operation kill time was a success. Only problem is, I've still got to go to sleep tonight, wake up tomorrow morning and go to school and see Jade.

I'm just so anxious to get it over with. I have a feeling that tomorrow will be the hardest day of this "new break" I'm putting me and Jade. Probably because I'm setting boundaries; and I guess I'm just super nervous because I'm setting boundaries against Jade West.

Who does that!?

Oh God, I'm feeling anxious again. I plan on telling Jade what to do? I plan on scolding her and embarrassing her and ignoring her? Oh God, she'll kill me!

Kill me!

The anxiety comes back full force; as does the need to go to The Gorilla Club.

I should just go. Pinky promises don't mean much to Jade anyway. And it'll make me feel much better if I go. I'll have a few hours of mindless distraction, and then I'll come home, and fall right asleep. Then I'll just have the morning to spazz about going to school to see Jade.

But I can't do it. Pinky promises may not mean much to Jade, but they mean everything to me. I can't start breaking any of them just because she did.

I'll just take a couple more pills and go back to sleep.

I already feel a little drowsy and disconnected from myself, so I only take one more.

This time, I'm asleep before my head hits the pillow.

I wake up in time, hearing my alarm. I'm still tired, and my arm hurts a little cause I slept on it, but I get up, shower, dress, just like it's a regular school day.

It's when I get to my car that I remember.

I told Jade I wanted a real break. She didn't listen; and now I'm going to tell her again at school today. In front of everyone.

I feel the anxiety come back. I take deep breathes, to try and calm myself down a little.

It doesn't work much, but I can't exactly go to The Gorilla Club or take more pills. It's time to face this.

I make a detour first though, indulging in a little bit of my creeper side. I don't know why I think so, but I just have this feeling that seeing the twins will calm me down. Even though it should have the exact opposite effect on me. Even though it should make me feel sadder and such, but I don't think it will. It didn't Thursday. It made me miss them, but it also made me smile to see them. In fact, seeing the twins always puts a smile on my face. And perhaps that's all I need. A little bit of happy to put on my face and get me through the day.

I get to their school just in time. In fact, I almost miss them. I see Joy's car riding off, and I see Riley hurry into the school. Amber has stopped to tie her shoe, but Riley has kept going.

I frown as I park, close enough to see, but not in the way of parents dropping off their kids. This is so weird. Riley always waits for Amber. Even when she doesn't feel like it, she waits. Impatiently, and with a serious scowl on her face, but my monstrito never just leaves Amber behind.

I pull out my phone, tempted to call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing, but I catch myself at the last minute. I shouldn't do that. I don't have the right to do that.

I sigh deeply and rest my head against my steering wheel. This was a bad idea. This was a very bad idea. Because I don't feel better. I didn't get any "happy" out of this visit. Now, on top of all the anxiety, my heart aches. Bad.

Suddenly, there's a tap at my window.

I scowl.

Not at anyone in particular, but mostly at myself. I probably parked in a teacher's parking spot.

I turn to look at my window and gasp. Amber is staring back at me.

She doesn't move and neither do I. She just stares at me, and I stare right back at her.

Soooooo busted.

Then she speaks. And I can't hear her, but I know she says my name. And I see hurt and betrayal in her eyes. And I watch her bottom lip quiver.

She's going to cry.

I don't want to see her cry.

I open my door. Not for one second do I think this is a bad idea. I don't think at all. I just pull her to me.

"Tori." She sobs into my neck and I feel like complete and utter kaka. Why did I come here? How could I do this? Show up and upset her like this. I should've stayed away.

"Hey!" I hear, but I don't hear it at the same time. I'm so focused on Amber. My sweet Mamita.

I feel her stiffen, but I hold on tighter. She's probably a little upset with me. Probably? No, She is upset with me. I didn't say goodbye to her the last time she saw me, and I feel so guilty over it.

"I'm sorry, Mamita." I apologize, my voice cracking. I really love this kid. And I miss her so much.

"Hey!" I hear again, and suddenly Amber is pulled out of my car. Just snatched away.

I glare at the person who took her from me. The lady With The Clipboard. The one who hates my guts and always gives me a hard time when I try to pick the twins up.

"I wasn't going to steal her!" I yell back at the woman. "You know me!"

She sneers at me. "I'll have to report this incident to her parents or guardian."

She grabs Amber by the wrist and starts marching her toward the school.

Amber walks a little ways with her before snatching away, bending down and then she's running back toward me.

"Una flor para ti." She says, handing me the thing she bent to pick up.

A little purple flower. It's probably a weed, but I tell her it's the most beautiful flower in the world.

She beams up at me. That smile hurts my heart, and it makes me happy at the same time.

"Denme besos." I tell her.

She puckers up immediately, and I swoop down to give her a kiss before The Lady With The Clipboard can snatch her away again. And she does snatch her away again. This time a little more roughly than what I imagine is allowed.

Amber almost trips as she takes her away at a pace that is way too fast for my little mamita to keep up with. It also doesn't help that Amber isn't looking forward. She keeps looking back at me, like she's afraid to watch me disappear. So I don't let her. I watch her disappear instead. I watch her all the way until she's inside the building, and then I get back in my car.

I still have to go to school.

I still have to see Jade. I still have to be firm with her and stand my ground and set boundaries, but I'm feeling so tired, and vulnerable. She'd walk all over me for sure.

I go back home.

I can't go to school. Though it'd be better if I did. I'd have something to do if I went to school, but I just can't do it. Not today. I'll do it tomorrow.

I'll set boundaries tomorrow.

For now, I just want to go to sleep and fight my urge to go to The Gorilla Club. And I have every intention of doing that until I get a text from Alyssa Vaughn. She wants to know if I want to do lunch today.

Good, a distraction.

I text her back:

Me: Actually, let's do brunch today. I'm not going to school.

Alyssa: Pick you up from your house then?

Me: Yep

{~~~~O~~~~}

I don't know where Alyssa lives, but she must live close because she's at my house 18 minutes later. It takes about 23 minutes to get to Jade's house…I should really stop thinking of Jade.

"Hey, Gorgeous." Alyssa grins at me.

I smile at her attempt to cheer me up. I obviously look like crap.

"Good morning." I smile back as I get into her car.

"Where's your girlfriend?"

"School." I answer. "We're on a break."

"Really? Why"

I shrug. "I just love her too much and it's too intense right now."

"So, this was your idea?"

"Yeah."

"Interesting."

"Not really," I shake my head and stare out the window.

"So, you guys are seeing other people?"

"She can." I shrug.

"But you?"

"I don't really want to." I shrug again.

"Interesting." She repeats.

We're silent for a few minutes. It's actually kind of uncomfortable so I'm relieved when Alyssa speaks again.

"Is she?" She asks.

I scrunch up my face. "What?"

"Seeing other people?" She clarifies.

"She claims she doesn't want to." I shrug. It's like my fifth time doing that.

"Claims?"

"I just want to give her the options." I shrug…again.

"Hm."

We pull into a small diner. Jerry's I think the sign says. I've never been here before. It's the kind of place that technically has waiters but you can find your own table, and then go to the breakfast buffet.

I grab my plate, and walk up to the bar. Everything looks good, pretty. But my stomach doesn't rumble. The smell doesn't entice me. I'm not hungry. But I should be starving. I don't remember eating much yesterday. Not unless you count the three Tylenol pm pills I took.

Alyssa comes up beside me and starts putting things on her plate. "You should do the same, gorgeous." She uses her head to indicate my empty plate. I smile at her, to try and make it seem as though I was goofily staring off into space and not thinking about how unhungry I am.

That's when I see one of the last people I would ever want to see here.

Joy.

I'm so tempted to duck and run, even if it makes me look like an idiot. I don't care. But she spots me. And she smiles at me.

She walks up to me without the slightest bit of hesitation. Absently, I notice there's a woman following her. And I also realize that when Joy stops in front of me, the lady stops beside Joy.

"Hello, sweetheart." She says to me.

I can barely say anything. She turns to the woman beside her. "Alex, this is Tori, my daughter's," she quickly glances at Alyssa beside me. "friend." she finishes. "Tori, this is one of my clients, Alex."

I know I should tell Alex it's nice to meet her, but that's not what comes out of my mouth.

I say, "This isn't a date." Instead.

"Oh," Joy smirks at me. She looks nothing like Jade, but that "oh" and that smirk reminded me of her. It actually distracts me a little. Makes me sad.

"You know," Joy cocks her head to the side, and I refocus my attention on her face. Her eyes mostly. They're brown. They remind me of Jade. She told me her favorite color is brown once. "I had an interesting conversation with Ms. Tyson this morning." Joy finishes.

I frown. Who the chiz is Ms. Tyson?

"Something about your attempt to kidnap Amber." Joy elaborates.

My face heats up. The Lady With The Clipboard. She must be Ms. Tyson. And she called Joy to tell her what happened. That I stalked her children like a creeper.

"I wasn't going to kidnap…I didn't…I just wanted to see….I'm sorry." I cry. Literally. I just start crying. "I messed up."

"Oh, sweetheart." Joy croons, wrapping me up in a very firm hug. The kind where I can't move or hardly breathe.

Jade does that to me. She must've gotten it from Joy.

"You didn't mess up, Tori." Joy tells me. "You can see them anytime you want; you know that, don't you?"

I shake my head. I don't know that. I don't think that's a good idea.

"Well you can," she squeezes me tighter.

"She'll be mad." I sob.

"She won't." Joy says, not even bothering to ask who "she" is. We both know it's Jade.

"She will." I insist.

"She won't, baby." She answers softly before kissing the side of my head. And I miss Jade even more. Because she always calls me that.

And when Joy finally pulls back, it hurts my heart.

But I know she's got to get back to her breakfast meeting, and I've got to get back to my friend.

I turn and look for her, finally realizing she's not beside me anymore.

I spot her at a table near the window. She's eating and on her phone.

I say goodbye to Joy and the lady she's with. I totally forgot her name. Then I fill my plate up with fruit and two waffles, suddenly starving.

I sit in front of Alyssa, she doesn't look up at me immediately and I take no offense. She's Alyssa Vaughn. She's busy even when she's not busy.

"So what was that all about?" She asks while my mouth is full.

I try to swallow quickly so I can answer, but it ends up going down the wrong pipe, and it hurts so dang bad.

Alyssa gets up and pats my back until the near death experience subsides.

"What?" I ask once my throat is clear.

"The whole, "this is not a date thing?" That was like the first thing you said to that woman."

"Oh," I smile sadly. "That was Jade's mom."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, I didn't want her to get the wrong idea. Especially over nothing."

"Over nothing?"

"Yeah, you'd never date me, or be interested." I wave her off.

Alyssa frowns. "Why not?"

"Because you're Alyssa Vaughn and I'm nobody." I say, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

Alyssa sighs exaggeratedly and shakes her head at me.

"What?" I frown in confusion.

"What has that girlfriend done to you?"

"Nothing." I answer. "She doesn't do anything to me."

She stares at me for a little bit, then she just smiles out of nowhere. It's a little disconcerting.

"You're birthday's in a few weeks, how would you like to come on set with me next weekend?"

My eyes light up. "On set?"

"Yeah, I'm working on a movie. Shh, Don't tell anybody." She winks.

I laugh a little.

"I'd love to." I grin. Not only is it cool to go on set, but just having something to look forward to, I don't know. It just boosts my spirits.

Me and Alyssa fall into easy conversation then. I fire question after question at her, and she smiles and laughs at my enthusiasm. It feels like she's looking at me like I'm a little kid, or something; but it's okay. She's Alyssa Vaughn; she's up there, while I'm down here trying to get up there.

All too soon, she's telling me that it's time to go. And I know she's a very busy person. So I don't take offense. It's not like she's cutting our brunch short. We've been here for nearly two hours.

I pull out my purse so I can pay my way, but Alyssa smacks at my hands. "Don't even think about it, gorgeous," she says as she hands her card over.

She's been calling me gorgeous all day, like it's my name, and I've brushed it off because I haven't really been feeling very "gorgeous" lately. But this time, it makes me blush.