Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Request by kayna96: Neji and Hina interaction after she's discharged from the hospital.
Hinata was avoiding him.
He should've expected it. Truthfully, a part of him did. That toxic thing in the back of his mind had been telling him time and time again about this. It talked so much that he'd grown used to its presence. He didn't need it to tell him how he was far less than he'd once thought; than others knew him to be as—Neji knew that already. He ruminated over it heavily during and after his punishment. Neji was a prodigy, but he was human, too. He was and could once again be driven by emotions.
There were so few things he could trust in this world, so Neji relied on what he could feel and what he could taste. His heart, even now, was still wrapped in thorns with tight brambles of fear. But it wasn't because of hate. Not anymore. This was regret. Truth's horrors. The consequences of actions he was still trying to fix. He didn't need that voice constantly whispering in the back of his head because he felt the wash of it every morning when he woke. It was even stronger when night came to claim whatever light remained.
Some days, when the adrenaline still hadn't subsided after long hours of training with his uncle, he'd stay up and think of all those that would've been affected had his hate been allowed to reign free during their fight in the Chunin Exams. Hanabi, who would've steeled herself and unleashed her fury against the Branch House. Hiashi, who would've looked at him with a mixture of remorse and utter disdain. Ko, who would've cut the marble to mark her grave. Her teammates that would've gladly maimed him if given the chance. Too many. Far too many.
Neji's hands shook at the thought. He balled them into fists and screwed his eyes shut until the feelings that flooded him passed.
By the time he opened them again, Hinata was standing before him. He was startled, but ice cold discipline drilled into him for years ensured that his face remained as impassive as possible. How had she snuck up on him? How long had she been standing there? Did she see the remorse that clouded his expression before he could school it? Oh, he hoped not. He didn't want to be the cause of another frown on her face.
As he examined her, he couldn't help but think that she looked ready to keel over. Hinata's knees were shaking so bad. Even her lower lip quivered in a way that made him wonder if she feared he'd hit her again. Shino and Kiba were standing a few feet behind her. Pillars of support that he was supposed to be among. He wasn't jealous… not really. Envy felt foreign to him, but he knew enough about it to know that this was something different. This was darker and aimed more at himself than a third party. Because there they were, silent sentinels with squared shoulders, and here he was, on the other side, watching Hinata tremble before him.
Hinata was his charge, and yet…
Shino had his hands in his pockets, while Kiba had his arms crossed behind his head. They looked casual enough, but Neji saw the threats in their eyes that just dared him to try something; dared him to give them an excuse to fight. Neji wouldn't though. He'd be humiliated if he did—and not because he thought he'd lose.
Hinata breathed in deeply.
It caught Neji's attention enough that he decided to disregard her two protective companions. She had come to him. Finally. Neji had tried getting her attention with a small—and what he hoped was a welcoming—smile at her whenever their eyes met after she was discharged from the hospital. She had returned it hesitantly during those first few days, but as the weeks pressed on, she'd just make a noise of surprise, then turn in the other direction to run far, far away from him.
"Hinata-sama," he called, ignoring the way the Inuzuka scoffed at the title. "Can I help you?"
She breathed again and clenched her fists.
Neji waited patiently for her.
Hinata had always been nervous, meek, and a little too frightened of the world for her own good. But it was only after examining her a little closer that Neji learned to respect her for the way she consistently overcame those innate qualities when the time called for it. And this was one of those times.
She was reliable in the face of hardship. Courageous, despite her fear. Unlike so many others, she'd gladly die for what she believed in. He revered her for it. Hinata maintained a kindness that should've been crushed long ago not by steeling herself, but by constantly choosing to surmount the emotions that were a natural part of her. She climbed a mountain every day, and Neji knew—knew—that once she was older, she'd be able to jump up with ease.
He wanted to help her reach that point.
His arm rose to touch her in encouragement, but when he saw her teammates grow stiff, he stopped. Neji allowed it to hover over her shoulder instead. Comfort that she could choose to accept with her own two hands if she so wished.
Hinata didn't even think.
She squeezed his fingers with all of hers like he was her only moor in an endless sea. It hurt, but he didn't dare tell her to let go.
"I—I'm sorry for avoiding you," she finally managed to stutter out.
"There's no reason to be so, Hinata-sama. I understand why."
"I—It's not because of you, i—it's b—because I—I feel ashamed." Her head was bowed so low that he thought he should've been the only one that felt that way. She was an heiress in front of her failed guardian. Any humiliation wasn't hers to bear. "Ashamed t—that you got h—hurt because of my weakness."
Neji's shoulders went rigid.
With his free hand, he cupped the back of Hinata's neck to bring her head up, so he could look her in the eye. She squeaked at the sudden touch. Her hands never left his. Behind her, Kiba snarled and made a move to break them apart, but Shino raised his arm to stop him. He'd have to thank the Aburame after this. Wonderful.
"I was punished because of my mistakes," he said, fierce, so she wouldn't protest it. "It was no one's fault, but my own, Hinata-sama. Please don't feel guilty over something that was so clearly my problem to begin with."
This was worse than the pain he'd felt when he was punished for his actions. He'd break if she continued.
There was so much hurt in her eyes—for him, he realized—that he pulled her towards him, unable to bear the thought of her looking at him with such an expression. She was so inexplicably fond of him, and just the thought of it filled him with the need to be uncharacteristically gentle with her. Hinata made a noise of surprise that was muffled by his chest. But he didn't want to let go. Not now and never again. This hug was as much to comfort them both as it was an apology for all of the times he had looked and touched her with enough force to shatter a boulder.
"Is this why you've been avoiding me?" he whispered against her hair.
"Y—You noticed?"
How could he not?
He didn't answer, only drew her towards him. Closer, so that there was barely even space for breath between them.
"Neji," she called, and the sound of his name on her lips was enough to make him pull slightly away. There was such resolution in her voice. Even the stutter had steadied. Not a frightened genin now. Only an heiress. He wanted to look at her face. "I promise not to avoid you again. Do… do you think we can work things out? Slowly? I…"
"You?" he prompted when her pause had gone on for too long.
"I," she shut her eyes to bolster her spirit, "would like you to take your place as my guardian again."
Her eyes drifted down in embarrassment at the wish. She even touched her pointer fingers together, entirely ignorant to how his entire being abruptly expanded in joy at her words. Even that despicable voice in the back of him mind vanished. Scared off like a flock of birds from the option she'd just given him... the one he thought he'd never have again. The very one he'd been longing for.
He must've taken too long to answer though, because in a smaller voice, she added, "But only if it's something you want, too."
Here it is, he thought, feeling more than a little blessed, my second chance.
Neji grabbed her hands, keeping her from that nervous habit. He vowed to never let her feel such a way again. At least not when she was standing in front of him, when he was close enough for her to reach and feel secure.
"Hinata-sama," he somehow managed to choke out amidst the waves of barely tempered emotion clogging his throat. "It would be my honor."
A/N: There's a lot of narration in my fics because it's easier to say the things than type the scenes out word for word. I'm not trying to create overly long chapters. In other news, I feel like I'm making a multi-chapter fic now. I'll be ignoring requests to continue the aftermath plot in a linear fashion because I'm reiterating the things I've already said in previous chapters. I'll consider other ideas I find interesting. Thank you kindly to those that contributed to requests in this segment of Devotion.