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*While you sleep dream of me...
"My love?"
Fili heard the familiar and more than beloved voice through a sleepy haze that was too heavy on his pained body. He had fallen asleep right next to his uncle in the most uncomfortable position ever and only that voice was able to draw him out of that deep slumber. His wound was screaming in pain and his head was swimming with dizziness, but the warm embrace on his back felt was so affectionate that his heart skirted. He opened his eyes slowly and smiled sadly. "Mother?"
Her arms wrapped around his chest and her head pressed on his nape. "My darling boy….my boy….my boy." Her voice was broken and each word was coming out with difficulty as her hot breath scorched his skin.
His hands clutched hers almost in despair. "Mother?" he stuttered.
She held him tighter than before, close to her, protectively, not allowing him out to pull away from her caring arms. As for her worried fingers they felt around, traced, touched, searched. His face, his hair, his hands, his wound... "Where is it? Where did those filths hurt you my love?" She muttered with a flustered countenance that could barely contain her deep concern for the well being of her only surviving child.
His hand pointed at his back vaguely. Dis' demeanour plunged as her fingers offered a trembling touch to the bulge under his tunic. She inhaled sharply. "I am so sorry my love…please forgive me for not being there...I am so sorry..."
He turned around and pulled her in his arms with such need that they both began sobbing hard. "Don't..." He gritted his teeth and squeezed his eyes tight.
They remained like that enfolded in each other for a long time. Bali, Dwalin and Oin closed the door behind them respectfully and took Dain with them, as he was the one who had escorted the ladies up here. Eilin stood close to the fireplace utterly stunned, with her frozen fingers twisting firmly against each other, unable to draw her eyes away from the bloody face of the King who was laying still and completely unaware of the emotional turmoil that his family was going through, right next to his bedside.
Dis felt her knees unlocking from the burden that her soul was carrying and emptied her exhausted body on a chair next to her son. Then she drew Fili's head on her shoulder and gifted his sweaty temple with dozens of kisses meant to soothe his pain away. Her long elegant fingers were lingering above the tourniquet on his back, barely daring to touch him. Tenderly tracing the point of impact while she silently prayed for his health. She held him close to her bosom cradling him as if he was still a young dwarfling instead of a valiant warrior Prince, ready to sacrifice himself for his kingdom. She yearned to stop his tears, whilst she was unable to do the same for herself.
Eilin removed her eyes respectfully from the Princess and her son and turned them to the bedridden King, consuming every detail of his wounded and pale face. The moment they reached the grumbled gates of Erebor she was overcome by dreaded apprehension as she didn't feel ready to meet the legendary Oakenshield yet. She was simply unwilling to see the real face of this mighty King and destroy the imaginary picture she had created for him from the stories that her best friend Rhiannon told her during some cold and rainy nights inside a silent and still tavern. Mythical stories for the Old Kings of the Lost Realms whispered into the darkness while Eilin was drawing one of those epic Kings by the flickering flame of a weak candle light.
So when they entered the royal chamber she felt her breath catching and her heart constricting as the King she saw pale and sweating on the bed was nothing like she had imagined. He looked defeated from time and hardships. He didn't resemble the King whose bravery, proud stature and authority the bard songs were praising all the time. His handsome face, the trademark of the Longbeards was still carefully hidden under all those bruises, crusty wounds and wild hair. Still though it was nothing like the face she had imagined for him. Nothing on him, was even close to her drawings and that seriously unnerved her from the first moment she laid eyes on him. His resemblance to his sister was so uncanny that Eilin kept going back and forth trying to compare were these siblings conjoined and were they differed. She was certain that if this renowned Dwarf Lord opened his eyes their colour was going to be exactly like the Princess' and that, for some unknown reason, threw Eilin completely off balance.
Notwithstanding the King's poor condition though, Eilin was still very intimidated by his sleeping figure. His size looked truly formidable for a Dwarf and she felt her stomach dropping even at the thought of him being awake and standing up in front of her. Dis's concerned voice drew Eilin out of her intense observations.
"I need to check on your wound my son." She tried to turn her son around.
He took her hand and kissed it lovingly. "Oin has taken good care of me mom, I am well. Can you please believe me?"
Fresh tears adorned her broken countenance. "No, I cannot, I cannot believe anything good anymore." Her hand got buried under the covers and grasped the sweaty hand of her brother. Her eyes drifted onto his bloody face and she cupped her mouth. "I just cannot. Look at him..." She muttered and her head shook from the disbelief of what she was seeing in the stead of her mighty brother.
Fili threw his heavy arms around her shoulders and pressed his forehead on her temple. "He is doing much better mom."
Her eyes consumed her brother's broken face, as her tears streamed down her cheeks plentiful. "What have they done to you Thorin?" She whispered and her shaking fingers coasted gently around his bearded jawline. His once proud and clear forehead now was embellished with a deep wound that had bled down over his nose and was way too red and angry for his pale face. His skin was glistening under the light of the fire with sweat and his dry lips were parted, but his breaths were deep and calm.
Her palm cupped his bloody forehead and her heart jumped to her throat expecting to feel the consuming heat, but surprisingly his skin was cool. "Fever dropped?" Dis looked up sharply at her son.
"Yes, the Elves helped him. He had one leg dangling above the chasm of death and they revived him mother." Fili smiled, eager to convey how much better Thorin's situation was to his worried mother.
A sobbing exclamation escaped her throat and she wiped her tears with the back of her hand. Her forever strong and dignified brother was nowhere to be seen. This body here looked beaten up, weak almost destroyed. These blood crusty hair didn't resemble his long, wavy, black mane with the majestic silver streaks. Nobody could see his imposing and lofty stature as he was hidden miserably under all those quilts sweating every inch of the illness away. His beauty was concealed under this hideous pale mask of death.
"He looks awful…" -her breath hitched- "and he would have been mad if he ever heard me wounding his vanity." Her fingers touched his brow gently and moved to his temple to linger above that awful deep wound.
"Does it matter how he looks? He is doing much better…." -Fili pressed Thorin's hand fervently- "He is getting better by it's passing moment mother, that is what matters…" he whispered.
"That is him doing better?" She wiped her jawline angrily and sniffled.
"This is the first time since the battle ended that Balin and Dwalin felt comfortable enough to leave the room. This is the first time that I don't feel like his next breath is going to be his last. Is that enough to explain how dire his situation was before?" Fili's anguish filled eyes seared into his mother's.
She squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her jawline. One hand became possessively tight on Fili's and the other on Thorin's. It took her several moments to speak, but when she did her voice was diminished. "I am sorry for everything you have been through my son. I shouldn't have send you on this trek. Thorin shouldn't have reclaimed this damned mountain. The treasure in it's bowels is cursed. This gold killed Thrain, Thror and my boy! It almost killed you and him…."
Fili's eyes filled with grief. "Too late for regrets mother. We must take care of the living now…"
She nodded and looked at her brother long and hard before leaning her head on his cheek. Her perfect braids picked up his blood as she rubbed her forehead against his temple. "Hey, big bad wolf can you hear me? I am here…." She pulled back the thick quilt to reveal a heavily sweaty tunic and a very bloody bed that made her knees weak. She squeezed her eyes tight and her hand levitated trembling above the dark maroon spot on his tunic. The scent of sweat and blood was heavy from him, but she didn't care. She wanted him to stain her. She wanted to share his pain and suffering. She wanted to be a part of it, like she had always been one of the biggest and most important parts of his life. "Did you almost manage your glorious exit this time?" She felt her tears mingling with his sweat.
Fili pressed her hand. "Someone stopped him, thank Mahal."
"I want to find that someone and kiss them for not allowing you to leave me, although I am sure you'd think otherwise if you knew how pissed off I am with you." Her nose flared.
Her brother's face remained unbothered in it's restful slumber.
"A honoured exit, sword at hand would have been preferable than having to deal with me after this huge mess up, right?" She humphed and her shaking fingers lifted up his tunic slowly. Her eyes though remained shut and her soul balancing on the precipice of a void at the possibility of facing what was hiding under that bloody tunic.
"He didn't mess up…" Fili frowned at her with a sudden need to protect his uncle.
"I don't know if I want to hug him till he opens his eyes again or kill him for taking away my son!" Her teeth gritted and the hand that held his tunic up began trembling heavily.
"The war took away Kili, not your brother!" Fili's eyes welled with frustration at how unjust his mother sounded right now.
"You cannot understand the pain of a mother…" she muttered and felt her throat closing down.
"I can understand the love of a brother though" -Fili looked at her with immeasurable sadness- "and he can understand the love of a father. Don't place such a heavy burden on his shoulders please. He will not be able to pull through from it." Fili pressed her hand beseechingly and searched for her eyes.
She felt her throat convulsing as tears sprang afresh. "I know…"
"He already blames himself…." Fili continued mercilessly.
She pressed her forehead on Thorin's temple almost angrily. "I am certain that he does…"
Fili closed his eyes defeated. "Then please let him be...Don't add to his guilt. He doesn't need that now. He needs all of us to help him pull through."
The silence from Dis was long and heavy. "Big bad wolf open your eyes and look at me." -She finally said and opened up her eyes slowly. When she saw the extent of the bleeding at the side of his torso and under the bed she felt like faint, but she gritted her teeth and wiped away her tears furiously- "What demon of Morgul did this to you my love?" She whispered and bit both of her lips, trying to stop their tremor.
"The same beast who killed our grandfather, Frerin and my father!" Fili's voice came blunt and heavy as steel to make her gasp for air.
Her body shuddered "Azog..." Her voice was barely heard.
Fili clutched her hand and lowered it until it touched Thorin's wound. "He avenged our family mother."
Dis choked. "Oh, heavens..."
"He avenged our family even if that meant him dying in the process. Touch his wound and feel it pulsate and bleed under your skin!" -He hissed and pressed her hand on the stained bandage until she felt the blood that was gathered there wetting her palm- "Feel his ultimate sacrifice for us all. He wasn't willing to live after seeing me fall to this filth and don't tell me you didn't expect him to lay down his life for me and Kili without a second thought."
Dis sobbed hard and gave her son a conquered nod.
Fili felt his heart slightly settling down after that. "Therefore keep your anger at bay mother, because this man here fighting for his life, is the best father me and Kili could have ever had."
Her words were released almost violently between deep moans of pain. "I know, heavens above I know..."
"Then keep silent…please…and show him your love and your respect..." Fili's voice softened and he retrieved his hand from hers.
Dis' palm remained quivering above Thorin's wound, counting his deep breaths. "I will my son…I will…" She whispered.
Fili stood up sharply and wiped his eyes clean. Then he started unravelling the bandage. "This needs to be changed." He said heavily.
Dis looked at her son with eyes full of sadness and then turned to her brother. "Hey big bad wolf want to wake up and scare me? I am not going anywhere unless you open your eyes and curse me out of your sight, like you always did when we were young, remember?"
When Fili removed the bandage completely her gaze fell on the petrifying diagonal wound that had torn her brother in half. It started right under his ribs and extended down to his belly button. Dis felt her heart dropping into an icy pool of terror and forced herself to speak, but her voice came out sluggish and heavy, while her eyes couldn't stop looking with dread at that horrifying gash. "I am sure you thought I was back in Ered Luin waiting for news. Little did you know that I was always right next to your doorstep in the Iron Hills all this time. I would have never remained behind Thorin, didn't you know that? Don't you know me by now?" She kept on asking, not expecting an answer, so when his deep voice replied quietly she looked up shocked.
"I do gerbil." He reassured her.
The cry that left Dis' mouth made Eilin visibly jitter, but it was the King's rich voice which seemed to be born from stone that made the maiden unable to hold her tears. The Princess fell on the King and enfolded him protectively, gushing all her love onto him. "Open your eyes to see me! Open your eyes to see your gerbil Thorin!"
He did and his bloodshot eyes gazed at her almost dreamily for a few agonising moments. Then his mouth formed a sweet smile and his hand lifted with difficulty until his fingers could touch the sideburns of her jawline. "You haven't changed a single bit." He whispered.
"You haven't changed either, my big kingly brother!" She was laughing and crying at the same time.
He licked his chapped lips and had a clear difficulty focusing on her. "What are you doing in this hellhole?"
She kissed the side of his mouth almost possessively. "Came to put your pieces back together you bloody fool…"
He huffed and instantly groaned in pain. "It won't be easy this time gerbil."
She frowned and caressed his forehead and temples gently. "You always aim to make my life hard, but I've got you. Trust me, I got you!" She reassured him lovingly and gave Fili a worried glance as he was trying to clean the wound.
"This mess is a bit tougher than you tending to my broken nose…" he trailed off and his dirty fingers run under her jawline and reached her chin.
She pressed her lips stubbornly. "I am here for you wolf no matter how hard everything might seem right now…I will make everything better for you, trust me!" She pulled his hand up and kissed his fingers.
"Gerbil?" he released an exhausted exhalation and felt his eyes closing heavily once more.
"Yes my love?" she licked her lips eagerly and and rubbed her cheek on his torn knuckles.
"Please forgive me…" his chest welled and he squeezed her fingers tightly.
"No..no…there is nothing to forgive..." She murmured quickly, trying to make him see her through his haze. Trying to reach him in some manner.
"But yet there is….there is…" He felt himself dozing off slowly once again. His hand reached out and grasped hers in a desperate need to remain there with her. To make sure that he was holding his little sister and that he was still alive. He needed to ask her forgiveness even if she never gave it to him.
"No wolf there is nothing to forgive. You did what you had to do…" She reassured him and caressed his cheek affectionately.
"I am sorry I lost him…" He felt his tears releasing hot and he was unable to stop them.
A pair of soft hands touched his chest and the warm voice of Fili made him cry even harder. "No uncle, no…don't do this please…"
"There is nothing to forgive, my love…You avenged my fallen son! You avenged our family and I am lucky you didn't get killed in the process….because if I ever lost you too, then I would die…" She cradled her brother's head under her chin and kissed his bloody hair.
His silent nod made her weep even harder. "Forgive me gerbil for failing my boy…"
"I love you my brother …Never doubt this. Never doubt me…" She stammered, feeling her heart breaking into a dozen pieces.
He wanted to reassure her that he loved her more than life, but the darkness made his mouth too numb and his body too heavy once again...as he faded away from them. Dis looked at his face sharply. "Thorin?!"
Fili shook his head and cleared his teary face. "He is resting."
Dis exhaled and fell defeated on Thorin's chest. She closed her eyes.
"Thank you for not overburdening him with more guilt..." Fili whispered.
Dis looked at him sadly for a few moments before she pulled up. Her hand caressed her brother's crusty hair and beard until she could trust her voice to deliver once more. Then she spoke to Eilin. "Go outside and ask Balin to show you the hot springs. Bring us up a clean bucket of warm water."
Eilin bowed to the ground and feeling extremely emotional from everything she had heard she went out and timidly asked for Lord Balin. When an elderly dwarf of white hair and a regal white beard came forth, she asked for the hot springs and he offered to escort her there himself.
The walk down to the springs was much more spirited than Eilin would have ever expected from this old Dwarf Lord. She followed his self certain footsteps down to the kitchens that were mostly dusty and abandoned, if you excluded one bench area that had been recently cleaned sloppily and one cauldron boiling above a steady fire in one of the twenty hearths that were aligned against the heavy stone walls. There Balin pointed towards two buckets and when she went to pick both of them up and carry one in each hand, he surprised her by stepping in and taking them instead.
She uttered a feeble "No, my Lord," but he elbowed her aside with a sad smile.
"No Lords here this noon girl" -His gaze was desolate- "Not after what we have all been through. Just a few honest folk mourning our dead and taking care of our living."
She didn't reply, but with renewed respect towards this wise Dwarf Lord, she followed his fast pace the best way she could.
They twisted and turned at least a dozens golden gilded staircases. Went in and out of endless, snakelike corridors that dangled above huge chasms that led to the centre of the earth. She lost all sense of direction and it was the breathtaking, but brief view of a vast chamber that glittered in bright gold, that only managed to make her stop to catch her breath.
Balin turned to her calmly. "The treasure vaults." His words were curt and held a melancholy that made Eilin frown under the hood.
"I'm slowing you down master, forgive me." She whispered and got ready to follow him again, forcing herself to keep her eyes away from that famous, but cursed treasure hoard.
Balin stood still with his eyes lost at the entrance of the abysmal golden chamber. "I cannot blame you for becoming so entranced. Who wouldn't stop to admire the unlimited treasures that our brothers dug from the deep through the centuries? The whole of Middle Earth covets this gold..."
She turned towards the rune-covered archways that felt forbidding to her and her gaze got lost at the golden hue that reflected against the polished black stone.
"Not even our Kings were immune to it's allure…" Balin continued and his tone turned heavy, saturated with a bitterness that even a stranger like Eilin was able to discern.
She was unable to find anything to reply to that.
"Except from one…" Balin's gaze turned thoughtful.
Eilin felt her nape crawling with apprehension.
"Yes, except one." -Balin continued his sad monologue and then looked at her. After a brief moment he offered her a ghostly smile- "Come on then." He said and continued down the staircase. She followed him while trying to forget his puzzling words about the Lords of this Kingdom until they entered the final archway, behind which the air was heavy with warm precipitation.
Balin looked at her and smiled. "We are very close to the volcano that sleeps under the mountain. Now take a bucket, rinse it thoroughly and fill it up with water." He added when they passed a pair of tall golden gilded doors and entered an immense black cave whose ceiling Eilin was unable to discern apart from the circular air ducts that led to the top of the mountain and allowed some dim light to break through all this darkness. The lake waters were equally black, seemingly impenetrable without any of the beautiful lanterns that adorned the walls being lit. Several places in the water were boiling and there was a large waterfall at the far end of the black lake, with water pouring plenty through a large gap at the stones.
"There is an underground river that runs through the mountain. It gets warmed up by the volcano and it feeds the waters of the various lakes in the residential caverns. The same river spews out of the mouth at the entrance and feeds the River Running, which shares it's refreshing dew with the Sea of Rhun, the Iron Hills, Mirkwood, Mount Gundabad, the valley of Azanulbizar and extends down to the land of Rohan and even Gondor. Our waters even pass through the Ash Mountains offering invigorating life to the filth that lays hidden there, but also to the west beyond the Misty Mountains. It travels through the Ettenmoors and Rivendell and it offers life to the magical forest of Lorien before ending up into the open sea." Balin explained proudly.
Eilin couldn't help but smile. "It feels almost as if Erebor feeds wisdom the rest of the world, doesn't it?" She asked.
Balin chuckled. "It is the starting point of a river that is meant to invigorate so many realms and so many people. If you want to call that symbolic, then I suppose in a manner you are right. Imagine how significant and heavy is the responsibility of this stronghold upon the shoulders of it's King then." Balin's demeanour became grave.
Eilin licked her lips and looked around magnetised by the words of Balin and by the importance of the Lonely Mountain to the rest of the world. She has seen deep forests one could get lost in, endless valleys and serene lakes that felt like a balm for a wounded soul. Angry rivers that threatened to take you away in their furious journey and the majestic open seas. She has seen villages of men and wonder cities build by Dwarfs who were such famous architects. She has even gotten a far glimpse of a few enchanting Elven realms. This though... this dark hot lake under the heavy solidarity of the Lonely Mountain impressed her more than anything she had ever seen, mostly because of Lord Balin's words about how important these waters were for the rest of Middle Earth.
Balin's lips turned to a lopsided smile. "You should see it in all it's glory when all the beautiful lanterns are lit up bright."
"It's so impressive." She whispered.
Balin kneeled down and begun cleaning his bucket. "Not everyone is allowed to use these hot springs though young lady. They are reserved for the Royal family, but you can have access to the various other lakes under the mountain."
She smiled.
"Come wash your bucket now." Balin said and resumed his work.
Eilin hurried up and kneeled a little further off. She rinsed the dusty bucket thoroughly and filled it to the brim. When she tried to pick it, it was so heavy that her hood fell back from the effort. She looked towards Balin's direction with wide eyes full of dread. One of her long reddish locks got caught between her lips and she didn't even dare pull it out. She was gazing with dread at the old Dwarf Lord, feeling the heavy bucket pulling her to the floor, or maybe through it with any kind of luck.
The shadows that covered this place, made her unable to see Balin's eyes clearly, but the silence that drew between them felt almost unbearable. With trembling hands she placed the bucket down and pulled her hood up quickly. "Forgive me, my Lord." She whispered, hoping that he hadn't noticed anything strange on her face.
Balin came over and thrust his chin at her sternly. "Pull your hood down". That sounded so much like an order that Eilin lifted two shaking hands and dragged half heartedly the hood away from her head. She quickly averted her eyes that found solace on her muddy boots.
"Hmmm, impressive lack of hair on your face, taller and thinner than your average Dwarrowdam, nevertheless undoubtedly belonging to our kin…" Balin spoke his observations neutrally, but that didn't make her feel at ease.
Her fingers twisted nervously around each other. "I am a bastard." Her voice was quiet, but the words were clear enough.
"I'd suggest you didn't use such demeaning words for your person inside these halls." Balin frowned.
"I am just stating the truth." She looked up at him shyly.
"I am sure you go around by other names, more appropriate..." Balin raised his brow.
"Eilin..." She muttered and her cherry lips cracked a timid smile.
"Nice to meet you Eilin. I will also suggest that you be careful not to let that hood slide off your head frequently, at least until this place settles down and it's head is able to take command."
She frowned. "I am always careful master. I don't want to offend anyone with my appearance."
Balin pursed his lips. "Oh, you don't understand. You are rather attractive and that might be dangerous when you are surrounded by thousands of frustrated men who just got off a war. Use that hood often when you are surrounded by soldiers." Balin wised and picked up his bucket.
Eilin felt her stomach dropping...Did that Dwarf Lord just call her attractive?
"Come on, pick up your bucket and follow me." Balin said nonchalantly and began walking out of the cave without waiting for her to get a grip on her emotions that seemed to be totally bewildered by his words at that point.
She frowned, picked up the bucket and followed him clumsily. She wanted to ask him how come he found her attractive when she was clearly not, but she didn't dare. She just followed as quickly as she could his military pace and ended up panting all the way up to the main hallways, where finally her loud wheezing made her drop her bucket and lean over to rest her hands on her knees.
He stopped and looked back. "Need help?"
She drew a deep breath and shook her head. "No, my Lord". She lifted the bucket with great effort and took a few steps more before it slipped from her hands and fell on the floor, spilling water everywhere.
Balin frowned. "We need that water lassie. I suppose waiting after a Princess isn't as physically demanding. Here I'll help you out."
She pulled herself up, forgot about the word attractive, gritted her teeth and pulled the bucket up with determination. "I can do it!" She spat through gritted teeth.
Balin pulled back and smiled. "Not only unusually attractive, but also stubborn. Very good."
She smiled feeling deeply embarrassed and came over to him. "Thank you my Lord."
Balin chuckled. "And strong as bull when she wants to." He rejoined and resumed his steady walk.
A small smile ghosted Eilin's lips and she gave Balin's back an amused look as she followed him up to the King's apartments.
The moment she entered, her amazed impressions of the treasure vaults and the hot springs got instantly overpowered by the heavy blanket of grief that had engulfed this room and all its occupants. She placed the bucket next to the Princess and waited patiently with her hands crossed.
"Come on wolf, we have to clean you. Fili take hold of him from other side." -Dis commanded and they began to undress him. Eilin pulled back and averted her eyes respectfully, while Dis started a small trip down to memory lane, in order to lure her brother back into consciousness- "Do you remember how you came to give me that name Thorin? Gerbil…do you remember how you got to name me? It was the same day I named you wolf….do you remember my darling?" She caressed his forehead and her voice aroused him slightly. He stirred under her fingers that were cleaning his wound.
She looked up worriedly at Fili. "Be more gentle." He told her and she nodded.
"You were in your teen years wolf and I was just a toddler…do you remember? That day is still so vivid in my mind…" Dis whispered and cleaned the wound on his forehead carefully.
"Lift up your arm and throw the bloody axe to the tree, Dwalin!" Thorin cried and pointed at the circular target Fundin had placed on a sturdy tree several feet away from them.
"That's what I am trying to do! Shut it!" Dwalin snapped and threw the formidable double axe on the target, almost splitting the bark in two.
"You would have been dead by now, you took too long to swing it across." Thorin chastised the slightly shorter, but equally wide boy that came up to him threateningly.
"Why don't you do it better then and get off my back!" Young Dwalin barked.
"Fine!" Thorin retorted and walked decisively to the target.
"Fine! I am getting tired of you always telling me what to do…" Dwalin crossed his arms defensively when he saw Thorin ripping the axe out of the target with enviable ease and marching up to him angrily.
"If that target was an Orc attacking you, do you think they'd wait until you weighed the axe and then measured the distance and the speed of the wind or what have you? They'd charge and kill you. Do it fast!" Thorin took on an authoritative tone.
"Fine then…an Orc is attacking you now!" Dwalin cried and pointed at the target.
Thorin didn't hesitate and the axe left his young yet mighty hand with way too much speed. It found the target right in the middle and gave the bark the final blow, which broke it in half. Thorin raised his brow and took a step back when he saw the tree falling to the ground. The sharp cracking sounds of the wood breaking as it fell made a flock of birds that was nesting on top fly away terrified.
"Hey wait a moment! It was not your blow that brought the tree down! My blow almost cut it in half before you even tried a throw!" Dwalin came up to him frustrated.
Thorin crossed his arms and flicked his shoulders. "We both brought the tree down, so calm down."
Dwalin frowned, taken aback. "We did?"
"Yes you bloody idiot…" Thorin said and made to go fetch the axe so they could try on a different tree.
"Oh, yeah, we both did I guess." Dwalin smiled smugly and walked after his best friend.
That is when the voice of Thorin's mom made them both stop and turn around confused. "Thorin, stop…!" She was walking quickly, holding Dis in her hands and when she reached her oldest son she was already out of breath.
Thorin came up to her wearing his usual critical frown that his mother hated so much and that his father felt so proud of. "What's wrong mother?"
The tall and beautiful Dwarrowdam pulled several blonde tendrils away from her eyes and passed Dis down to him. "Frerin is burning up and you know that. Your father is in a meeting with grandad, so I need you to take care of your sister."
"Mom come on! Why me again!?" Thorin asked exasperated.
Frái's gaze fell heavy on him and she raised her brow. "Didn't I just tell you why? Are you deaf young man or out to piss me off? Don't even try it today, cause I am not in the mood! Careful you don't get a thrashing instead of Thrain who left me alone with a bloody toddler and a kid burning up!"
"Why don't you give her to one of your maidens?" Thorin said angrily and looked down at his sister who was sucking her thumb vigorously. Her azure eyes were larger than life upon her small face. She giggled when their eyes met and his frown deepened.
His mom's wrathful finger poked his shoulder and send him two steps back. "Because as you very well know, our family does not allow outsiders to care for the children! What's in the family remains in the family and the older siblings take care of the younger ones!"
"Moooom…" he rolled his eyes.
"I need your help young man so stop moaning! Besides helping me raise your sister and brother will come handy in the future when you have your own kids. You're going to have a lot of experience and your wife won't get as pissy as I am getting at your dad right now! Doesn't that sound good?!" His mom wised.
"That's not even close to sounding enthralling to me…" He winced.
"Well who cares! You enjoyment at this moment is the last thing on my mind." -Frái thrust Dis' milk bottle in his hand and turned her back to them- "She didn't eat anything with me, so try feeding her now!" She raised her finger in the air in a silent waring and walked back to the golden city with quick decisive steps, leaving behind a musing Thorin who held Dis in his arms loosely.
Dwalin sighed and came up next to him. "She can be scarier than your dad sometimes."
"Don't you think I know?" Thorin said and sat down on a boulder, placing Dis on his knee.
"I suppose that's the end of our training then?" Dwalin sat next to him and began plucking out some flowers.
"Yeah unless I throw her on the target instead of an axe…" Thorin's lips turned up in a snarky smile and Dwalin laughed.
"Ah, don't worry we did well today anyhow."
"Go back home if you want, I'll join you when I feed this troll." Thorin pursed his lips and offered her the bottle half hoping that she would take it.
"She does look like a troll, look at how big her eyes are!" Dwalin leaned over.
Dis grabbed the bottle and rested her head on the crease of his elbow. Then she began sucking and rolled her eyes shut in satisfaction. Thorin looked critically at his friend. "No she doesn't look like a troll…"
"You just said she did!" Dwalin frowned.
"I am allowed to say anything I want about my sister, you are not…" Thorin warned.
Dwalin crossed his arms angrily. "Fine…but she does look weird with these huge eyes and small face…"
Thorin's lips turned up in a small smile. "Actually she looks more like a gerbil…"
Dwalin harked. "Yeah, gerbil indeed!"
"She's cute like that…" -Thorin mused and when he felt Dwalin's critical gaze he sobered up- "when she's eating or sleeping because otherwise she's a hell of a bother."
Dwalin pursed his lips. "Much like my brother Balin, I can feel you."
"You get to be the youngest son so you don't understand what I am going through. She and Frerin always end up in my care." Thorin frowned at the unfairness of it all.
Dwalin rested his hand on Thorin's shoulder. "Believe me being the youngest has its drawbacks. I never get to have my way and I always have to follow my brother's rules, which quite honestly most of the times are stupid!"
Thorin looked at him sideways and smirked. "I suppose we both have serious problems…"
"Don't you wish you were an only child sometimes?" Dwalin asked.
Thorin nodded. "Oh, yeah I do..." he looked down at his sister who pushed the bottle away after drinking half of it and now milk was spilled all over her mouth and chin.
"Disgusting..." Dwalin scrounged his nose.
Thorin shoved the milk bottle in the hands of an abhorred Dwalin and cleaned her cheeks and mouth with the end of his sleeve. "Finished gerbil?" He asked.
She giggled and tried to catch his beard braid with her small hands. "Be be wolth…be be wolth…" she mumbled.
Thorin smirked. "You want the big bad wolf to get you?"
She screeched and covered her face. Then she peeked under her fingers and giggled again. "Be be wolth!"
He raised his large hands and began crawling his way up her legs and round belly. "The big bad wolf is going to eat your belly and then he's going to come down and munch your small neck…" He brought his head on her neck and began rubbing his nose on her soft skin.
She went crazy. She began kicking and screaming and laughing like crazy. Her small hands got buried in his thick wavy hair and pulled away the silver bead that was holding them away from his face. Then she bit down on his leather arm band and screeched. "Be be wolth!" He ended up having all the saliva from her teething mouth on his forearm and just when he thought things couldn't get worse her burp was wet and close to his face, so he ended up having milk on his beard. Even Dwalin couldn't remain serious through all this and began laughing.
"Shut up you fool!" Thorin cursed and tried to wipe away the milk with the end of his sleeve when his friend elbowed him so hard on the ribs that Thorin cried in pain. He glowered at Dwalin, but the later pointed towards the road with a quiet tilt of his head. Thorin turned dishevelled as he was from his sister's treatment and felt his breath catching.
The bright April sun paled in front of the brightness of her blue eyes and he felt time stopping as her beautiful face turned towards them. The air lifted her long black hair in soft waves behind her back and his lips dropped open in admiration. Her eyes gazed straight into his soul and a sweet smile spread on her lips that ended up at the corners of her eyes. She waved happily and Thorin's hand came up on its own accord to wave back. He felt his chest palpitating and his stomach tightening with an anticipation that he didn't know how to label at that age. The only thing he wanted to do was look at the most beautiful face he had ever seen in his few years of life. He inhaled deeply, but the air never reached his lungs. It got trapped somewhere in his windpipes as she turned her head around and spoke to her father. He took her hand and led her away from them while Thorin remained there absolutely entranced out of his mind, with his sister fighting off his numb fingers and Dwalin salivating like a buffoon right next to him.
After a long time Dwalin spoke. "Wow…"
Thorin nodded dumbly. "Yeah…"
"Lord Cael's daughter isn't she?"
"Yeah…"
"She's so pretty…"
Thorin swallowed a very dry throat. "Yeah…" that was the only thing his youthful heart was able to conjure as Siv's perfect outline got slowly lost down the road.
"She actually waved at you, did you see that?..." Dwalin sounded equally mesmerised.
"Yeah..."
"So are we going to fight over her in the future or is your dad not going to find her a proper match for the next King?" Dwalin smirked.
"Who told you that she would choose one of us? Half of Erebor is after her!" Thorin asked.
"Because you are the next King and I am your best friend!" Dwalin puffed up proudly.
Thorin looked spellbound towards the path she walked on. "That will hardly be enough…she is way out of our league." He trailed off.
Dwalin hissed. "Cousin, I think you've fallen for her. Be careful she doesn't figure you out, because then you truly won't have a chance!"
Thorin frowned. "What?"
Dwalin pursed his lips. "When she's around, you act like a complete moron…"
Thorin's eyes flashed thunder. "What the hell!"
"Be be wolth…" His sister reminded him.
Thorin's shoulders deflated. "Did the most beautiful girl in Erebor just see me with your spit on my beard?" He asked his sister.
She giggled and grabbed good hold of his beard braid making him wince in pain. "Yeth, be be wolth…" She agreed not knowing what she was agreeing to.
Dwalin was laughing to tears next to him. "You should see your hair! Not a very attractive image for a future king….!"
Thorin showed him his teeth. "Shut up unless you want that axe buried into your spine next!"
Dwalin fell off the boulder from laughter and rolled amidst the fallen tree leaves, holding his belly.
Dis got off Thorin's knees and began tickling Dwalin and laughing at him. Thorin cupped his forehead and his eyes fell on the road that Siv took one more time. His heart throbbed with the painful certainty that the prettiest girl in Erebor didn't even care that he existed.
As he lay there between sleep and alertness, remembering how much he admired, so many years ago, the only love of his life with a childish innocence that had long been forgotten, he was unaware that someone else was equally admiring him.
Eilin took in a shaky breath…wounded mortally or not, this was not a simple Dwarf Lord, laying half naked in front of her. He had the appearance and the making of a true King. Far more impressive in his ill state than all those golden statues of his forefathers in the King's Halls. Feeling rudely intrusive, she quickly lowered her eyes and tried to calm down her galloping heart. How could she contain her nervousness when she was standing next to the legendary King whose name had been the equivalent of so many great feats of bravery? Having no real answer for that she turned quickly to the bucket and prepared clean cloths, trying to make herself useful.
"Help me pull him to the side." Dis grumbled.
Eilin joined her mistress as they all tried to steady him.
"He always had a big frame, even as a kid". Dis continued.
Eilin swallowed a rather dry throat, not knowing what to say. The King's body was crashed upon her bosom and her frail hands were trembling with the effort of keeping him steady, even though he was being held by the Prince from the other side.
"He used his big body to terrorise me and my brother to submission. The big bad wolf…" Dis smiled and changed the sheets, quickly and efficiently, as they rolled him from side to side.
"I thought it was his risky nature scared you the most, not his size. That is what you have always been telling us." Fili tried an honest, but exhausted smile.
She nodded. "Indeed, for he was a daredevil ever since childhood. Never listened to my father's orders unless they were for battle training. It was only when he turned sixty that he started noticing the etiquette that he had to follow as a member of the Royal family. Later still until he began understanding politics, which I think truly disappointed him."
Eilin frowned in confusion.
Dis continued almost in a monotone as she worked on him. "You are as oblivious of the dynamics in politics as he was it seems, Eilin."
Eilin's lips curled up in a perplexed smile.
Dis pursed her lips. "My brother thought that politics included honesty and intrepidity. Two virtues that had adorned his character throughout his life. Unfortunately these virtues don't belong in politics. That was a serious disadvantage for him, since he was to be the next King. He was using an iron fist and a heavy sword to control grandad's army and he was brilliant in that, but he didn't have an eye for diplomacy. Brave and honest he was. Fair to all no matter their status and that won people over to him. He became much beloved not only from the army he was commanding, but also from the common people, exactly because of that fairness, but that was not enough to make him a good politician."
Eilin nodded.
Fili smiled. "He still hates politics..."
Dis wiped some stray tears away from her eyes and placed the ointment on his wound as gently as she could. "I know." -When Thorin objected mildly Fili's steady hands soothed him- "Let us treat you uncle, please."
When Thorin settled down again, Dis pointed where his neck met his muscular shoulder. "See this here?"
Eilin saw a long and deep looking scar amidst all the fresh abrasions and blue skin.
"He took a perilously high dive into the river and tore his neck on some sharp riverbed stones, as part of a freaking bet! Frerin pulled him out of the water that had turned deep red. Don't even know how long I pressed his wound down feeling his blood spilling through my fingers, until my father came. That was the only time I saw dad truly scared…"
Eilin's looked up. "How old were you then my Lady?"
Dis looked at Thorin's closed eyes. "Too young to handle someone so big, but old enough to take care of my brothers when they needed me. You see mom never trusted any maidens or lieutenants to care for us. She always said that what happens in the family, remains in the family. We had to protect and help each other. Most of the times due to his age, Thorin was the one helping me and Frerin, but his daring nature made me his nurse in more than a couple of nightmarish occasions."
"Do you have any siblings?" Fili asked Eilin.
Eilin's mouth turned down. "I am not sure, my Lord'.
Dis looked at her fleetingly.
Eilin hesitation was brief. "I am an orphan. I know nothing about my parents."
Dis pressed her lips and gave her another neutral look before returning her attention to dressing up the wound. "Maybe you should view this as being lucky, instead of feeling as sorry as you sound."
Eilin confusion was palpable. "My lady?"
Dis looked down at her. "You don't have to ran after a brother who wants to prove himself resilient against death, repeatedly…"
Eilin's mouth upturned in a small smile.
"Or try to calm down your father who wants to thrash him with his heaviest belt for stealing King Thranduil's best horse and storming the woodland realm with it just to piss off the Elves." Dis winked at her.
Fili shook his head and snorted.
Eilin's smile brightened. "Did he earn another scar from that adventure?"
Dis' lips turned down. "That earned him a serious beating from our father and the honour of being inked with the rune of fierceness, which means he never regretted it."
Eilin looked down at his wide chest and saw various tattoos. Others had faded through time and others looked darker and more clear. Suddenly she wanted to know the story behind each and every one.
As her lady was busing herself with making Thorin as comfortable as possible, the bashful maiden decided to take the dirty cloths out to rinse them. A very authoritative Gloin gave her directions to the laundry rooms, which she found them after a long time. She rinsed the cloths in a large cavern that had another warm lake in it, but it's waters were not as crystal clear as the ones in the Royal hot springs. Then she returned and bypassing Gloin who looked at her with a critical frown she knocked on the door. Dis' voice allowed her to enter. She came in and kept her eyes stubbornly stuck on the elaborate stone panels with the golden borders that adorned the floor, and away from the bedridden King. She approached the fire and replenished it with fresh wood. Only the steady breathing of the King was heard in the chambers and she didn't dare interrupt the silence with any meaningless chatter. It wasn't long until she was addressed once again.
"I managed to persuade my son to rest, but I need to go to the burial vaults…" Dis' voice was a mere whisper and her skin had acquired a sick grey hue that worried Eilin.
Eilin bowed respectfully. "At your orders, my Lady."
"I need you to remain with the King and look after him for the duration of my absence." Dis' voice was hushed. It sounded empty of all strength, whereas a while earlier it was full of vigour and punch.
Eilin felt her stomach dropping at the terrifying prospect of being left alone with the King. "My Lady surely one of his bodyguards would be a more appropriate carer."
"They are soldiers. They took as good care of him as they could, but no one is a better carer to the wounded, than a woman. They don't have the gentleness of our hands or the nurture of our nature." Dis' voice warned Eilin not to make any attempts to slip out of this one.
Her head drooped defeated. "As you order, my Lady."
Dis gave her a curt nod. "I will return soon…" -She stood up looking more tired than Eilin had ever seen her. Now that she was alone with her maiden she had allowed herself to turn inwards for comfort as the sadness and fear assaulted her heart. She walked with heavy footsteps to the door- "Notify me the moment my brother wakes up." Dis looked at Eilin and for a brief moment a spark brightened up her eyes, which faded almost instantly.
"Yes, my Lady." Eilin curtsied to the Princess.
Dis gazed at her coldly for a few moments and then opened the door. Eilin looked at it closing with dread and when the lock fell back in place she visibly jittered. The silence of the room was heavy and ominous. His steady breathing didn't help her calm down at all. She felt the warmth of the fire burning up her cheeks and hands as she remained idle next to the hearth for what seemed like an eternity. Just when she felt herself beginning to sweat profusely, she decided to stop scaring herself and do her job. Just because she had never expected to meet the King of Erebor in her life and she was now ordered to nurture him, didn't mean that she had to remain standing next to the fire like a bloody imbecile, until she was cooked medium rare, right?
She scowled at her thoughts. "Right!" She whispered.
She lifted her eyes looked towards the bed timidly. The King hadn't move at all since she first saw him. It was not like he was going to open his eyes suddenly and scold her out of his presence. She looked at his candle lit face for a few more minutes before deciding that she needed to unglue herself from the hearth. She took off her hooded coat and felt her long red hair free falling heavy down to her waist. She crossed her arms protectively under her chest and approached the bed. She stood above him for several moments that rolled by in agonising silence and her eyes feasted on his features way longer than she had bargained for. The ability to observe the King under the Mountain with such insistent rudeness, scared her and exhilarated her at the same time. Who else apart from his brethren or kin was able to look at his face so closely? Especially someone like her. If they hadn't been forced into this unexpected situation, she would have never had the chance to meet him in person. He would be on his throne, surrounded by his court and she would be down at the kitchens.
Yet now…
….now she could see the angry red scar on his forehead and every inch of a handsome face that gained in sleep blessed peace. Something she supposed his face lost when he was awake, judging by the faint wrinkles of broodiness between his thick brows. It was as if she was looking at something forbidden under everyone's noses and that ignited a warmth of elation in her stomach, which in response tilted and twisted nervously more than once as she was observing the King's sleeping countenance. She frowned at her silly thoughts and shook her head with austerity after a few more moments of silent vigilance. Then she decided that she might as well make herself useful and she picked up a broom. It took her a long time to dust off all the surfaces and mop the floor, but in the end she wiped her brow satisfied with her work. It was inappropriate for the King of Erebor to sleep in such a dirty room, no matter how expensive the furniture looked, or how excellent the golden embellished masonry of the walls around them seemed and how artsy the mantlepiece of his large fireplace.
She approached his bed feeling her bone weary and still inexplicably skittish. Her hand lingering above his brow for a few seconds, but at the end the need to check on his temperature prevailed over her nervousness and her fingers touched a surprisingly soft skin. She frowned partly pleased to feel him cool and partly confused as her brain insisted that a Dwarf so old as this King should have a skin that felt like stone. She drew her hand back sharply and rubbed her fingers to eliminate the tingle that lingered on their tips now. She frowned down at the sleeping King and exhaled annoyed at the games her mind was playing on her.
Satisfied that there wasn't much else that she could do she approached the large balcony and looked at the setting sun, wanting a few moments to clear her head. Then her gaze darkened as she looked at the war zone under them. Hundreds of tents spread till the eyes and each of them was embellished by a small fire that had men all around. Here and there a song was heard from afar. A lament for the dead, or a hymn for the victorious. She felt herself calming down and only when her eyelids dropped heavy from fatigue did she close the window and returned to her seat.
This time with much less hesitation she touched his cool brow and feeling at peace with his state, she relaxed back to the chair and crossed her arms. This was going to be a long wait, but she wouldn't have given up her place for anyone at that moment. No matter how nervous this arrangement made her, she also appreciated it beyond count. As she closed her eyes her well formed lips began chanting a song her employer used to sing at the tavern she was raised in. A soft, almost too perfect voice came out of her throat without the need for any musical instruments to accompany the nice melody.
"While you sleep… dream of me,
I'll be keeping our memory,
Living in my heart and soul
Waiting for all the days…
When we will be together again,
Carry me to my love
All I see is the clouds above,
Where I know he is waiting for me…" *
A/N:
* Eurielle - Carry me
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