McKenna Hall

"THIS IS MY CONFESSION. AS DARK AS I AM, I WILL ALWAYS FIND ENOUGH LIGHT TO ADORE YOU TO PIECES, WITH ALL OF MY PIECES." JOHNNY NGUYEN

Starling City decided to grace us with a beautiful day today.

It rained all day yesterday, much to my disappointment at returning to the city after several months only to be greeted with empty streets and stormy clouds. Today, the sun is shining at its full capacity and the gentle breeze provides enough cooling for the park around the coffee shop to be packed.

I take another sip from the latte I received prior to taking a seat at the Grind and Jolt cafe. Starling looks just like how I left it; bright and sunny, with the underlying darkness only a certified few are aware of.

Well, I guessed that changed when Malcolm Merlyn decided to bust open the Glades with a man-made earthquake and Moira Queen decided to out him publically. The city then became aware of a fraction of the darkness that Starling City holds.

I remember sitting in my sister's apartment in Coast City, the shock and terror that filled me when Moira Queen's press conference came on TV, and the way my heart was pounding as I stayed up all night watching my city fall apart into pieces, not being able to do anything about it, miles away from Starling with a broken leg. I remember finally breaking down and crying after channel 65 played a montage of all the deaths and I caught sight of Tommy Merlyn. I remember mourning for my former friend, mourning for everyone that lost someone they loved; mourning for a city I knew was capable of so much more than destruction and death.

I remember mourning for Oliver Queen; the man that lost so much, and came back to lose so much more. As if being stranded on an island wasn't enough, he had to come home and deal with his mother being an accessory to a mass murder and the death of his best friend. He left the absolute darkness and came to so much more.

As a cop, I had recognized when the darkness briefly overtook him during our first date, when I asked him about the island. It was a stupid move on my part, I was curious and I let it overtake my ability to empathize. It didn't stop the darkness in Oliver, the darkness that he must have experienced, to make an appearance before he immediately shut it out, proving his effectiveness to do so. I was sympathetic and hurt. Sympathy for the man who felt as if he couldn't share that part of himself with someone else, as if he couldn't be himself, light and dark, with anyone, as if no one will love his darkness, wounds and scars. Hurt for the fact that he didn't feel comfortable enough sharing it with me. Sure it was only a first date, but I couldn't stop the hurt from making an appearance, even though I now realize (after getting over Oliver and meeting Zach, my boyfriend of 6 months) that the hurt was slightly unfair to blame on Oliver.

I hope he's doing well. I really do. I made sure to follow up on Starling City news occasionally and I know that he's inherited his family's company, and I know that he's doing a pretty good job of running it, if the smiles on the investors' faces during public outings say anything.

"The usual Mr. Queen?" My head swivels at the name, and I'm faced with the man of my thoughts standing at the counter, his coat handing off his arm.

I can see his smile from here, and even though I'm over him and in a happy committed relationship, I admit that the smile still sends butterflies into my tummy because, hello, no one is immune against Oliver Queen's smile.

"For me, yes. Can I get a white hot chocolate for Felicity please?" He asks the elderly barista, making a move to fetch his wallet from his pocket.

"How is she doing?" The barista, Lauren if I remember correctly, makes small talk, while the order goes through and Oliver punches his pin.

"She's doing good, still complaining about being my EA, and still refuses to bring me coffee," Oliver tells Lauren good-naturedly, but the smile on his face, a mixture of fondness and amusement, two emotions that I'd thought I'd never see Oliver Queen don for a girl makes me wonder. Who the hell is Felicity?

Grabbing the two cups, Oliver turns around to head for the door, manoeuvring his way through the crowd of people that walk in the shop after spending hours in the park. In doing so, his gaze falls on me, and I recognize the hint of shock and surprise before it morphs into a neutral confusion along with a hint of a smile. Abandoning his way to the exit, he walks towards me, coffee cup still in both hands, and winter coat still draped around his left arm.

"McKenna." His face is one of pure gladness, and I'm hoping this doesn't turn out to be as awkward as I expect it to be.

"Hi Oliver," I smile at him, trying to remember the boy that I was friends with instead of the man that I dated.

He waves his hand towards the empty seat in front of me, the empty seat that allowed me to watch him clearly (I don't know if I sound more like a cop or a stalker). "Do you mind?"

I shake my head, "Please, it's been some time."

He chuckles, but I see him holding back, and find that it doesn't hurt as much as it used to. Something tells me that it's not just me that's on the receiving end of Oliver wall. Oliver holding back on his friends and family will be one thing that they all will have to learn, accept and live with. "It's been a long time, almost a year. How are you? How's your leg?"

His concern is genuine and I'm thankful for that. I've spent so many months with sympathetic looks and concern from people who don't know me and it feels nice to get some genuine care after a long time.

I bring my much-healed leg out of the table, stretching it to the side to show him, "Much better. I still can't walk in high heels though, which makes wearing dresses a bitch, but I'll survive."

"I'm sure you will." He smiles at me, it's more of a small grin than a smile, but I'll take whatever I can get. I'll be lying if I said that the breakup didn't hurt, but it was easy to get over, even though my care for Oliver was a hundred percent genuine.

"Girlfriend?" I ask, pointing to the white-hot chocolate that I know belongs to a Felicity without having to read the name written in bold letters on the cup. I'm happy to learn that the thought of him moving on provides me with no hurt, just content and happiness for Oliver.

However, the man in front of me shakes his head with vigour, so much that it feels like he's denying himself rather than denying me. "No, no, not a girlfriend. Felicity is my friend."

I feel my brows rise ever so slightly at the finalization of his tone, and the way he starts off with the fact the Felicity is his friend before adding,

"And my overqualified Executive Assistant who has been promised her old job as an IT specialist as soon as I'm done figuring out how to run QC."

I'm shocked, and glad. Not many people would want to transition from EA to IT due to the extreme difference in payment, let alone request and demand of it. I'm glad that Oliver found someone, whether it's a friend or more, that is true to who she is, and doesn't give two cents about Oliver Queen's billions. He deserves more people like that in his life.

The rapid approaching of high-heels snaps me out of my inner musings and I look up to see a pretty blonde striding our way, her winter coat unzipped and flying being her, showcasing her neon orange dress that somehow suits her. She comes to a stop at my table, and her ponytail swishes in the air as she adjusts her glasses, "Oliver I—"

Her words come to a halt when she notices me, and as her eyes go slightly wide, I get a pretty good guess on whom the woman is.

"Hi. You probably don't remember me because you don't know me even though I know you and we've never really met but you're McKenna Hall the gorgeously beautiful cop—ex-cop and girlfriend—ex-girlfriend and Oh my God, I totally made this really awkward right?" She wrings her hand uncomfortably.

I smile at her, slightly dazed by her ramble, but charmed nevertheless. She's really refreshing. Felicity is like a bright ball of sunlight on a stormy day; I can see why Oliver likes her so much. "No, no. It's nice to meet you. You're Oliver's friend right?"

She beams while nodding, and I give myself a mental pat on the back for referring to her as Oliver's friend rather than his EA.

"Felicity," my gaze snaps to Oliver who has a smile similar to the one he had when he was previously asked about Felicity, only this one is slightly different; it's brighter, and happier. "What happened?"

Felicity looks momentarily confused at the question but gathers her surroundings quite rapidly before giving her boss a sheepish shrug, her cheeks going slightly pink.

"Well you were gone and I thought that maybe something happened like Lauren kidnapping you and my coffee or you getting shipwrecked again and I came looking for you because I thought that I would have to get on another plane to save you and believe me when I say I have no intention of going to an island that literally translates back to hell so..." the pink tinge on her cheeks grows darker and she shifts uncomfortably from foot to foot.

I have no time to feel sympathetic for the girl because I can feel my eyes go wide as I stare at Oliver and mentally prepare myself for a situation similar to what happened the last time the island was mentioned. Specifically our first date, where the darkness overtook him for a moment and he panicked, tried to hide, and caused the date to go downhill from there, (it most definitely didn't help matters that I had to leave after) especially since he donned the shuttered look for the rest of the short date.

I actually choke on my own drink, when Oliver's face remains the same; sending an awfully adorable grin towards Felicity's direction that is followed by a chuckle (a chuckle. A god to honest chuckle) before he tells her, "That would also be my preference."

I stare at the two of them for a moment as they're wrapped up in whatever bubble they have created, eyes only for each other, oblivious to the entire world for a moment, and I admit to myself that I'd never thought I'd see the day when Ollie was so enamoured with a girl that he sends her dopey grins, lovesick chuckles, buys her coffee, and stares at her as if there was no one in the world except her.

Best friends my ass!

As if noticing me for the first time since his blonde 'friend' walked in, Oliver clears his throat before getting up and focusing his attention on me.

"Sorry to cut this short, but I have to get back now."

I wave my hand in dismissal, "ya, sure, I'm going to head down to the precinct for a quick visit anyway."

He nods his head, "We should catch up sometime later. When are you heading back to Central City?"

I tell him Wednesday and he nods again, before looking at Felicity, who somehow understands what he's trying to say.

"Your Wednesday is cleared. Not yet, but I will clear it. As soon as we get back. Not the entire Wednesday, but lunch maybe. I don't think you have much on Wednesday anyway, if you don't count the investors meeting that you have to attend. Or maybe that was Thursday, but honestly, what's the difference?" I've only heard it two times, but I'm really starting to enjoy these babbles of Felicity's, they're completely endearing.

Oliver purses his lips as if he were to say something to her, but thinks better of it I suppose, because he instead asks me, "Wednesday? Lunch?"

Man, he can probably fit a day's worth of vocabulary on a coffee cup.

I just smile and nod, because, despite everything that went down between us, we were good friends growing up, and I want to know how he's been, and I want to talk about Tommy (who I was slightly closer to), and I just want to connect with someone that's not going to look at me and see an injury but rather a cop, someone who did something with her life. Call it selfish, but it's what I want.

I wave the two lovebirds goodbye, and I watch and listen as they make a quick stop in front of the door for Oliver to put on his jacket.

"Shipwrecked on an island?" Oliver's voice sounds bemused, but somehow I know that he's smiling at her.

"You never know with you." Felicity shrugs, and smiles a tiny smile of her own as Oliver leads her out of the cafe, hand placed protectively on her upper back.

I'm glad.

One would be a complete fool to think that Oliver got over what happened to him on the island, that he's comfortable talking about it, that he's comfortable when people mention it. Something like that takes decades to finally come to grips with; if one ever does.

Which leads me to conclude that there is just something about Felicity.

Oliver doesn't try to hide his darkness, past or scars away from her. He is openly himself, a hundred percent himself when he is around her and finds himself comfortable when doing so. He's found someone who he can share all his parts with, light and dark, and not have to worry about scaring her off, or being judged. In fact, he's even all right when the island is mentioned as a joke in a conversation and instead of the pain and sorrow, it brought him when I asked him, all he felt was amusement and fondness when it was Felicity.

She makes him smile. She makes him comfortable enough to share his mental and physical scars with her. He doesn't feel the need to hide who he truly is with her. She's exactly what he needs.

So if I hear wedding bells in my head as I watch Oliver and Felicity walk away from sight, smiling at each other, I'll just have to blame the beautiful day Starling has decided to grace us with today.

"WHILE THEY ALL FALL IN LOVE WITH HIS SMILE, HE WAITS FOR THE ONE WHO WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH HIS SCARS" THE DREAMER

McKenna Hall is glad Oliver Queen can share all of who he is with Felicity Smoak.