A/N: And for the Apriltello chapter you guys have been waiting for! ;)

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the TMNT characters; I only own my OC, Simone, in this chapter.

Enjoy!

Chapter 18

"...April!"

"Huh?...What?" I shake my head out of my cloudy thoughts when I hear my friend's frustrated voice.

"You were about to have a face full of Mr. Toots if I had to call your name one more time." She threatens me with her stuffed toy elephant as she waves 'Mr. Toots' in my face by the his little pink trunk. We're both sitting on the floor of her bedroom surrounded by blankets, pillows, and tons of late night snacks.

"Sorry, Simone." I give her an apologetic smile. "I just…. have some things on my mind."

"You're thinking about him again, aren't you?" With a sigh, I avert my eyes from her scrutinizing glare. "No…. No….. you are not allowed to think about that jerk on girls' night!

"Hey!" I shield my face against Mr. Toots as he comes flying toward my head. "And you are not allowed to abuse Mr. Toots, or my head on girls' night!" I giggle with a playful pout as I hug the stuffed toy to my chest. I'm trying to at least look happy for her sake, but she sees right through it.

"April, I'm serious! You've been moping around for the past two weeks over this 'Donnie' guy, who was a total butt to you. Girl, why are you still trippin' over him?"

I rest my chin on her plush elephant with a small sigh. "You wouldn't understand…. it's complicated." Simone thinks Donnie is a guy I met at Science camp last year. She's the only girlfriend I have to talk about guy stuff to. She respects my privacy and never pries for more details about Donnie, content with the bare basics I reveal to her. However, these couple of weeks have been hurtful and confusing. When I tried to talk to Donnie's brothers about his behavior, they seemed to be just as confused as me, and Casey…. yeah, no, definitely not talking to him about this. Then there was Simone.

"What exactly is there to understand, April? ...You said the dude was emotionally constipated, so you made the first move and kissed him, and he kissed you back. You call him, he yells at you and totally blows you off like an idiot." She taps the tips of her fingers as she counts off each event. "He's a moron who needs to get his crap together…. how complicated is that?"

"It's just… I'm worried about him. It's not like him at all. When I go to the La—his house, he won't even talk to me; he stays in his room the whole time I'm there."

"Well, he's obviously not worried about you or your feelings, so stop making excuses for him! I mean, what kind of guy pretends to like you and then treats you like you don't even exist?" I sigh again, which makes Simone's scowl soften in defeated exasperation. Cradling Mr. Toots between my raised knees and my chest, I lean back against the side of her bed. Our shoulders brush against each other as she leans back as well.

Maybe she's right. Maybe I'm being a silly, naïve little girl wishing that kiss actually meant something to Donnie. She is right. I have been making excuses for him, ignoring the ache in my heart when he locks himself away in his lab when he knows I'm visiting. And… and the way he snapped at me when I was only trying to help….

I blink several times to ward off impending tears. No. I will not allow a guy to make me cry. I'm stronger than that, better than that. If he wants to be stupid, mean, jerk, then I should give him a dose of his own medicine….

"April, you're my best friend. I hate seeing you so torn up over this jerk. You deserve better," she says softly as she hooks her mahogany arm around mine and leans her head against my shoulder. The depressing silence doesn't last long as Simone squeals excitedly beside me. Her eyes brighten hopefully as she nudges me with a smile. "Casey's been flirting with you all semester. You should totally take the bait." She suggestively wags her eyebrows at me.

I snort, twisting my neck to give her a nose-cringing look. "What am I, a trout?"

"Better than being 'Angsty April.'" She rolls her eyes with a sarcastic smirk.

"Hey!" I shove her playfully with my shoulder as she makes this horrible facial expression that I can assume is supposed to be my angst-ridden face.

"Seriously!" she says in the middle of a contagious guffaw. "You gotta admit beneath the septic tank hygiene, piano keys teeth, and super cocky machoness, there's actually a nice guy in there…. somewhere…. I'm pretty sure….." Her expression wavers with slight doubt. "I think…." As Simone ponders the likelihood of her statement, my T-cell jingles from my messenger bag on her bed. Reaching up, I pull the strap of my bag toward me until it falls onto my lap. Grabbing the shell-shaped phone from my bag, I can feel the blood drain from my face. "What? What's wrong?"

"It's him," I unintentionally whisper aloud.

"Give me that!" Before I even realize what she's doing the phone is swiped from my hands.

"Simone, no!" I make a grab for the ringing phone in her hand, but she holds it out of my reach. As we tussle on the floor, it looks like we're playing a game of Twister. "I'm not kidding, Simone, give it back!" She scrambles to her feet and I follow suit.

"Uh-uh, girl, I'm doin' this for your own good!" My heart stops as she presses the receive button and places the phone to her ear and inhales deeply. Simone is anything but tactful. Her opinionated persona is a force to be reckoned with. "Listen, you insensitive spaz-face jerk: April doesn't want to talk to you…"

"SIMONE!" She rolls her neck as if Donnie can see the sassy gesture behind her insulting words.

"As a matter of fact, you should lose this number, because if you hurt my friend again I will find you, and when I do, I will rip off your arm, and beat some freakin' sense into your nitwitted brain with said arm, then maybe you'll know how to talk to an awesome girl like April. I mean really! You have some nerve treating—"

"Donnie?!" I say breathlessly as I finally manage to manhandle the phone from my friend. I glare at her. She glares back, crossing her arms over her chest as she flops indignantly on her bed and sticks her pierced tongue out at me.

"….A-April? ...Is everything okay?"

"Don't you dare let him sweet talk you!" Simone whispers venomously at me. I pause as I remember how I cried from embarrassment after hanging up when he yelled at me for no reason. Even when I came to the Lair to talk to him, he literally locked me out of his lab. He might as well have locked me out of his life. I feel stupid for making my feelings known, for exposing so much of my fragility to him. A vindictive frown creases across my brow as I nod to Simone.

"Yeah, Donnie, everything's fine. Just having a girls' night talking about guys and how they're a bunch of thoughtless slimeballs." There's no humor in my voice and I hope he feels the chill from my icy tone.

"…Oh, that's… nice..." I smirk as he stumbles for words as his voice deflates. It feels good to hear the discomfort in his voice. "April, I… I really need your help. It's… it's about the retromutagen." My spiteful façade breaks a bit at the mention of the mutation antidote. "I hate to call you so late, but is there any way you can let me into the animal clinic you volunteer at?... I need a few pharmaceuticals that are essential to complete the batch I'm working on. I would just 'stealth' my way in and out, but I…. I also wanted to see you."

I am still ticked at him, but at the same time I feel like a heel for being so nasty when he is trying to finish an antidote for mutated citizens still lurking around the city. Be helpful, or be angry…. ugh, I hate this. Ultimately, my conscience wins out. "I'll be there in fifteen minutes," I reply tersely.

"Thank—" I hang up, before he can say anything else. I sigh, pushing my bangs back with my hand only for the auburn strands to flop back on my forehead. Simone continues to glare at me.

"You're ditching me." Simone's accusing tone whines as her full lips pucker into an exaggerated pout.

"He… wants to talk," I say, offering her a half-truth, keeping the reason for my departure as simple as possible.

"Talk? ...Is that code for 'we're busting his face in'? 'Cause if it is, then I'm so down with talking! Heck, let's talk all night! Hold a sec, lemme grab my pepper spray and brass knuckles then we can bounce!"

I watch dubiously as she opens her closet and starts tossing random items across her room in her crazed search for 'accessories,' as she likes to call them. Simone's a few inches shorter than me and a bit on the thicker side compared to society's stands of beauty. She may not know ninjitsu, but she knows crazy. To underestimate her would be like underestimating a puffer fish; they're both small and cute, but extremely dangerous and will blow up in your face when provoked. After a few more minutes of rummaging, she emerges from her closet, brass knuckles on either hand (where the heck did she get brass knuckles?!), something akin to secret agent shades on her face, and her concert combat boots on her feet. She's ready to beat the crap out of a guy she doesn't even know, because he broke my heart. I give her an endearing smile. She would actually look pretty hardcore if it weren't for the smiley face crop top and pajama pants covered in anime emoji faces. That's my friend, Simone, ready to take on the world for the sake of friendship.

"Let's do this." She skillfully twirls the pepper spray in her hand like Raph would twirl his sai.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" I hold up my hands trying to diffuse the firecracker standing in front of me. "Talking is not code for face-busting. I really am just going to talk to him, okay?" I give her a pleading smile.

"Okay." With amusing disappointment, she clunks the brass knuckles to the floor. "I'll settle for giving him the stink-eye then. Come on, we'll slip out my window and be back before my mom even knows we're gone."

"No!..." I block her from the window, my voice rises in slight panic, but I quickly recover in a calmer tone. "….I mean, no." She tilts her head suspiciously, arching her brow. "Seriously, what I really need you to do is cover for me in case my dad calls over here, okay?" My dad is still pretty overprotective of me since his discovery of aliens and mutants and checks up on me when I'm at Simone's house.

"Fine, I'll be your cover story. But if something goes down, text me and I'll be there with trash bags and a shovel." I give her an incredulous look, because honestly a part of me knows she's dead serious. "…I'm just sayin'…"

I roll my eyes good-naturedly with a smirk. "I promise, I'll call if I need to. Thanks, Simone." When I hug her, she feigns annoyance and squirms under my embrace, but I can still see the grin that twitches across her lips.

"You so owe me another girls' night."

And with yet another debt added to my proverbial BFF tab, I grab my phone and messenger bag and slip out the window uncertain of what tonight's 'talk' will hold.

Leaving a sticky note on my computer screen about taking a 'sewer walk', I slip out of my lab through the garage exit and I run as fast as my tired legs will carry me. I decide to travel by ground between the shadows of buildings. I'm not feeling so well and I honestly don't trust my balance or perception of depth enough to travel by rooftop. I'll have to be more watchful at ground level, but I'd rather take my chances here than risk a death-fall from a six-story building. Leaning against a dumpster, I clench my teeth as my limbs tremble with throbbing aches. The spasms are more frequent, especially in my left arm.

I push the pain aside as I look at the backdoor entrance of the animal clinic. I step back further into the shadows when I see April already there waiting for me. Dressed in flowered pajama pants and a winter coat, she hugs herself against the colder temperatures. I don't know who gave me that tongue-lashing on April's phone, but if it's any indication of what to expect tonight, I doubt this meeting will go well.

Was she really telling her friend what a horrible person I am? I can't say that I blame her. I've been horrible to her, my brothers, and Sensei. I feel terrible about using her this way but, it's for the best. It's the only way I can ensure a backup plan just in case... in case I can't stop this secondary mutation. I sigh as I step out of my hiding spot ready to face the fiery beauty before me.

What's taking him so long? I huff impatiently as I wrap my coat more snugly around me.

I… I also wanted to see you.

A part of me doesn't want to see him, and an equally anxious part of my heart is fluttery and faint at the thought of seeing my friend (ex-friend). I kick idly at a loose piece of asphalt. I'm afraid one look into his eyes will make me lose my stubborn resolve to stay angry with him. I mentally prepare to give him the coldest shoulder I can muster... No smiles, no small talk, just give him the supplies he needs and tell him to get out. I nod to myself in agreement with my mental plan. I narrow my eyes at a scraping sound to my left. Whipping out my tessen, I take the defense, ready to strike at any perceived threat. A familiar tall and lanky form emerges from the shadows and I relax my stance—marginally.

"Hey, April... ah, thanks for meeting me so late, I really appreciate –"

Turning on my heels, I jiggle the key in the backdoor's keyhole. I refuse to meet his gaze or to look at him at all. "Just make it fast," I interrupt his gentle voice as I fumble to open the door and stumble inside. I mentally curse my klutziness as my nervous hands turn off the building's alarm system. Security cameras are in the front of the building so we shouldn't have any problems as we search through supplies in the back room.

Get it together, O'Neil! He's only been in my presence for three minutes and I already feel my emotions coming undone. With a huff, I toughen my resolve, squaring my shoulders and stiffening my posture. I watch as he scans the small storage space thoughtfully. "What do you need?" I ask, all courteousness and niceties tossed to the side. He shakes his head, blinking out of whatever thoughts are bouncing around his head.

"Oh, I… I need some… probiotic capsules and…. syringes." He seems distracted and a little jumpy as he continues to look around the room. I roll my eyes and start hunting for his requested items.

It only takes me a few moments to retrieve the items he asked for. When I turn to face him, his back is turned and he's fumbling with something. I startle him as I loudly clear my throat and he whirls around with wide eyes. "Here." I hold the items out to him. His hands shake slightly as I drop the supplies into them. He places the items in a small tote bag on his shoulder.

"Thanks, April. This really means—"

"I need to get back to my friend's house, so you should go. I need to lock up." I manage to uphold a look of indifference as I cross my arms over my chest and head toward the alarm system.

I frown as he steps in front of me. "So… so, how are you? It's….. been awhile." Strangely, he looks everywhere, except at my face, which sends a wave of hurt through me. This cold shoulder deal is not working the way I planned it to. He's the one who should be feeling like a small and insignificant afterthought … not me.

It doesn't take me long to push down my hurt and reclaim my fury "And who's fault is that exactly, Donatello?" My hands find their way to my hips as I narrow my eyes at the purple-banded turtle.

He shrinks back toward the door as my words bite with just the right amount of scorn.

"You're… you're right. It is my fault. That night in your room… I'm sorry. I should have never kissed you back. It wasn't fair to you. It… it shouldn't have happened at all.

Something at the very core of my being breaks. He wishes we never kissed? ...He wishes I never proclaimed my love for him? ...The thought of that horrible realization brings irritating tears to my eyes, but I refuse to let those tears fall. I won't give him the satisfaction of seeing me cry. I trade my tears for a well-placed punch to his jawline. My knuckles throb from the impact, but I hold my head up denying any signs of physical or emotion pain.

His head snaps to the side from the punch. He seems a little shocked as he rubs his jaw. I almost feel sorry for punching him when I see the look of hurt on his face. He sighs, slumping his shoulders as he centers his gaze to the floor. "I guess I deserved that."

"You're darn right you deserve it! I said things to you that I've never said to anyone. I told you how I felt, I trusted you with that, and you just toss it away like it didn't even matter! You're nothing but an insensitive jerk!" My heart pounds in my chest. I can feel the angry heat burning in my cheeks. My throat is raw from screaming and after that short tirade, I am emotionally spent. My voice cracks as it wavers into a deflated whisper. "If you don't like me, fine, I get it, I'm a big girl, I'm not going to cry over it… over you. But I… I just need to know why… Is it because I'm not smart enough, pretty enough?..." I will myself not to cry, but my body betrays me as warm streams of tears trail down my face. I wipe my eyes with the sleeve of my coat and losing a considerable amount of dignity as I stare morosely at the floor.

I keep my head down as she expresses her anger with me. My head is pounding and my body aches, but I stand there absorbing her verbal blows… it's the least I can do after the way I've treated her. However, my head snaps up as her last few words sink in. I shake my head side to side. No. She can think whatever horrible things she wants to about me, but I won't allow her to question her value or beauty.

"No, that's not it at all." With uncertainty, I step toward her. She leans away, her posture cold and untrusting. Sadly, I step back again, not wanting to make her anymore uncomfortable than she already is. "April, you're brilliant. Your intellect is just a beautiful as your smile." I swallow the lump crawling its way up my throat. I need to do this quickly before I lose my nerve. "I just think its best if we .… stop." I briefly cover my face with my hand, willing away the pain behind my eyes.

A frown of hurt wrinkles her delicate brow. "…Stop what?"

Sighing, I wish I had brought a smoke bomb, but now's not the time to retreat. "Stop pretending there could ever be anything between us…. I don't love you." The shattered look etched into her face is the mirror image of the pieces shattering within me. The words fervently flood from my mouth like a water from a broken dam, but as much as it pains me I need to protect her. I love her too much to stop now. "…I don't love you, so just stay away from me… stop coming to the lair, and—"

"Stop it!" Her shout is full of watery emotion as her hands ball up into tight fists at her sides. "Why are you doing this, Donnie? Why are you saying these horrible things? I don't believe you!... It's not true!"

She's right you know. You do love her… just as much as I will love gouging her heart right out of her chest.

"IT IS TRUE!" I scream over the savage voice in my head, baring my teeth. It startles April into a unnatural silence. Tears sting my eyes. I never wanted to see such fear on her sweet angelic face.

I was so furious with him. I wanted to hurt him the same way he hurt me. I wanted him to feel the cutting blow of my words like the blade of my tessen through the chest cavity of a footbot. I loved him! ...I loved him and he just trashed my confession like two-week old tuna salad. But my burning fury derailed into pathetic self-consciousness. Instead of ripping him a new one, I start crying like some sappy bimbo and spewing my feelings.

Then he yells at me again, but unlike over the phone, I can feel it. There's a nightmarish vibe from him that sticks to me like slime. I am terrified into silence as I feel grimy tentacles slither over my psyche. Repulsive and creepy are the only words I can think of to describe this sensation of something humid breathing over me, stalking me with unnamable intentions. I force myself to push past the disturbing impressions that make me want to gag. Even though these dark vibrations feel like Donatello, something feels… off. I refuse to believe this darkness is Donnie; something is wrong.

Mentally, I gently push through his shaky safeguards until I hit a soft spot. At his core, a cluster of emotions swarm like hornets around a nest. His anguish, loneliness, and unhinging fear mentally pierce me like poisonous arrows. Finally, I feel it, weak and worn, but it's there. The same love that courses through my veins like a lifeline is the same pulsation softly fluttering at his core. It's then that I realize he's lying.

"Please, it's just easier this way." The hopelessness in his voice is deafening.

"For who?" I question softly, taking a step toward him. "Donnie, what's going on? This isn't you."

"…It …it is me." There's a shame in his eyes that I don't understand.

"I know you love me… you're… you're just hiding it again, but this time you're hiding it behind something dangerous, I can feel it." Earlier, I was so warped by my own hurt and vindictiveness, I avoided staring at him at all. However, in his current silence, I have a chance to take in his appearance.

His posture is hunched, hiding his true height. His hands and feet are considerably larger than the last time I saw him. Every few minutes, he twitches and scratches at random spots on his arms, neck, and head, leaving small flakes of skin in his wake. His neck suddenly cranes to the side as if he is listening to something only he can hear. Whatever he hears must not be pleasant, because his breathing hitches and his face immediately drains to a sickening pale green. With glossy eyes, he suddenly breaks out of the bizarre trance with a sharp gasp of air and a shaky exhale.

"Ah!" he cries out as he cradles his left arm against his chest.

"Donnie!" My panic rises as I watch him curl forward in pain. I rush to his side. "Please, tell me what's wrong…" I plead with him as he leans against the wall trying to breathe through the pain. I place my hand over his arm. With a gasp, I immediately jerk away, when I feel something ripple and shift beneath his skin.

A spasm violently jerks the muscles and tendons in my arm. April touches me before I can protest, but quickly pulls away. She obviously felt it too… the shift of a bone under my skin. "Just… just stay back! I don't want to hurt you." With my own ears I can hear the unfiltered fear in my voice…. fear for her safety. "Just stay away from me… please," I beg her as I step back toward the door. "…Stay back!" I shout at her when she inches toward me.

Aw, come on…. let her come a little closer…. she smells like strawberries… wonder what she tastes like?

"NO! I won't let you hurt her… I'll fix this even if it kills me!" I scream at the monstrosity in my mind eating away at my sanity.

"Donnie, who are you talking to?! ….. You're scaring me! Donatello, please… I love you…. let me help you."

This was supposed to be a clean break, but it's turned into a messy connection of emotional wiring that I'm too frazzled to untangle. I don't know what's worse, drowning beneath the waves of her love or dying for its thirst. It suddenly dawns on me that if I have to resort to my back-up plan, this may be my last time seeing her.

My love for her drowns out the malicious taunts in my head as I grip her tightly by the shoulders. Pressing my lips against her own, I tilt my head kissing her as tenderly as my trembling frame will allow.

A small suction pops between our lips as I push her back. "I'm so sorry, April. For everything." And with those parting words, I slam into the back door and disappear into the night, letting the November air chill my emotions into a state of numbness.

His grip on my shoulders is too tight and I'm sure there are bruises. I almost yelp in pain until his lips embrace mine and I go limp in his hold. It hurts. I can feel every raw emotion clawing viciously at his psyche and it physically hurts, but I refuse to pull away. My nails dig into the scutes of his shell as I steady myself against the onslaught of this present darkness. I embrace every feeling, making it my own, and God, it hurts. But I love him. With every inch of my being, I love him. I'd weather the storm of his dark emotions if he'd let me.

And at that very thought he pushes me away, apologizing before bolting out the door. I call out to him in the night, but I'm too late. He's already gone. I brush my fingers against my lips, still feeling the warmth of his touch. That was more than an apology kiss. It almost felt like he was saying good-bye….forever. Panic pumps through my racing heart as I fumble for my t-cell. So many of his fractured emotions are still floating in my mind and his behavior tonight was borderline schizophrenic. I walk over to reset the alarm system when I notice the lock on a box of hazardous material has been picked open and a single bottle is missing from a row of pharmaceutical vials.

I'll fix this even if it kills me!

As I stare down at the foam impression of the missing vial, his words bring a foreboding chill down my spine.

TBC…

Not exactly the Apriltello reunion you were expecting, huh? Hang in there folks, full-angst ahead! I know some people are not too fond of 'OC' characters, but rest assured, this is more than likely the first and last chapter Simone will be in…at least in this story. ;)

I want to take a moment to thank you all once again for every review, PM, and recommendation of this story. Never…I mean, NEVER would I have imagined this story would receive over 300 reviews! I'm really just dumbfounded. As all of you know by now, I make a habit to reply back to EVERYONE who reviews my story. I feel really bad that I'm not able to reply back to some of the awesome anonymous guests who leave reviews :(

Anons, you guys hold a special place in my heart as well, thank you! There is one particular Anon, who always leaves pretty hefty reviews…thank you for that. I'm not sure if you are the same Anon who was worried that this story will end to soon, but if you are no worries!...*Trust me*, there are plenty more chapters to come. I've outlined roughly 27 chapters but I'm thinking it may end up being 30….still working out the kinks, so we'll see ;)

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! *hugs all reviewers* You guys are awesome. As always please leave a review!

It's spoiler time! Four random lines from the next chapter:

My chest tightens as fear and panic prick my senses. "Mikey?..."

I'll make you hurt them, tear them limb from limb.

"I SAID GET OUT!"

…what else do I have to lose?

See you next chapter! XD