Christian's POV

Finally. After hours of research, I've found Ana. She still lives in her old apartment, has the same job, but has changed her phone number. I've just left Escala and I'm now driving towards Ana's. It's almost eleven o'clock on a Saturday night. I hope she's home. I don't really feel like going out and chasing her down into the morning.

I park on the side of the street right outside her apartment. One of the windows is lit up in a soft, golden glow. Thank God, she's home. My stomach begins to feel uneasy as I get out of the car, maybe I should have called first. No, this needs to happen now. I can't go another moment without seeing her beautiful face. It's already been long enough.

I walk up to the front door and press the doorbell. I can't remember the last time I've even felt this nervous. I'm Christian Grey, damn it! I don't get nervous. I hear a little bit of rustling inside before the door cracks open.

Ana is standing not even a foot away from me with an unreadable expression on her face. She almost looks tired. Her face is pale, there's dark circles under her eyes, and her hair hangs in front of her face. She's still so beautiful.

"Ana." Her name is a prayer on my lips. Her large, blue eyes go wide as if they're just now seeing me. Her breathing starts to quicken and her face goes completely white. She looks like she's about to faint. "Ana!" I throw my arms out and catch her just as her body start to sway. My hands hold onto her shoulders and keep her upright. "Are you alright?" I take one of my hands and brush my fingers against her cheek. She reacts immediately as if she's been electrocuted. She jumps back away from me and holds her hands out in front of her.

"You." She says. "You're not real." She holds her hands over her mouth and I see the tears spring into her eyes.

This is not how I wanted this to go…

"Ana, it's me." I try to tell her. She continues to shake her head back and forth. The tears escape and flow freely down her cheeks. Each tear sends a cold shiver through my heart. She doesn't need to be crying because of me.

"No," She says through her tears. "No, no, no. You can't be here." Rejection floods through me. Maybe it was a mistake coming here. Maybe I was wrong and she doesn't want to see me again.

"Ana, I want to talk to you. May I come in? Please?" I'm practically begging her to talk to me. I'll get on my hands and knees if I have to. Ana swipes her hand over her face and nods once. She opens the door wider and motions for me to come in.

The first thing I notice is that her apartment is ridiculously clean. Bottles of cleaner are littered around the tables, the living room is kept together, and the kitchen looks spotless. Even the wooden floors appear to be swept.

"I was just cleaning." She says quietly. She stands next to the door with her head down and her arms wrapped around her middle. Why is she acting like this?

"You did a good job." The atmosphere feels so awkward. I could cut the tension with a knife. Ana slowly walks over and sits on the couch. Her body seems to curl in on itself.

"Christian," She sighs my name and takes a deep breath. Hearing her say my name sends tiny jolts through my body. "Why are you here?" I also take a deep, calming breath and invite myself to go sit next to her. I sit close enough to smell the soft fragrance of her shampoo, but give her enough distance so she's not too uncomfortable.

"Ana, I just wanted to apologize. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am. That I should have never done what I did. That I should have known-"

"It's been four months, Christian." Her voice interrupts me. Our bodies have managed to turn themselves towards each other like magnets. She looks at me with a serious face that I haven't seen before. "It's been four months and now you decide to show up?"

"Ana, I was wrong before. That night should have never happened."

"But it did." She says. "It did and we broke up."

Even though her words are true, they still hurt. "I know." I sigh. "I know it happened, but that's why I'm here now. I want to talk about this. I want to-"

"To what?" She snaps. "To tell me you're sorry? And then what? Give me another contract that requires more whipping? More hurt?" She leaps off the couch and starts to walk around in little circles. She's angry. I understand. She has every right to be angry at me. "I don't want to be hurt anymore." Her voce goes soft at the end.

Her thin arms wrap around her body once more and I'm able to fully take in her physical state. She's a lot thinner than she was four months ago. Even under her sweatpants and long-sleeved shirt, I'm able to see the outline of her bones. Her cheeks are drastically sunken in, making her face appear more angular. Her once beautiful hair is now lifelessly hanging down her back and in front of her face. What the hell happened to her?

I can't stand this anymore. I get up from the couch and go to stand in front of her. Her face is lowered, hiding her beautiful eyes from my view. I can't have that. I've spent months without looking into her eyes. I'm not going to waste any more time. I place my hand under his chin and try to life her face to mine. Right as my skin touches hers, she flinches and moves back a step. Her wide eyes look at me in horror. Am I really that disgusting to her now?

"What are you doing tomorrow night?" I ask.

Her eyebrows crease in her forehead. She once again looks down in front of her. "I don't know." She whispers.

"Let me take you out to dinner. I caught you off guard tonight. We can start fresh tomorrow." I make a bold move and reach down to grasp her hand. Little electrical pulses run up my arm when our skin touches. I wonder if she feels it too. Her eyes flash up to meet mine and she doesn't pull her hand away. She doesn't say anything, but she lightly nods her head. I let out a breath of air. My chest feels lighter.

"Fantastic. I'll be here to pick you up around six. Is that alright?" she nods once more. I wonder if she's not feeling well. She's not acting like her usual self, but then again I don't expect her to greet me with open arms.

I open my mouth to say something else, but Ana's phone beeps in her pocket. She quickly pulls it out, reads whatever it says, and then frantically rushes over to the door.

"You need to go." She spurts out the words. She holds the door open and impatiently waits for me to leave. I'm confused at her sudden change in mood. "Please, Christian," She begs. "I'll go to dinner with you, just leave."

"Ana, are you alright? What's wrong?" I'm starting to really worry about her.

"I'm just not feeling well and want to go to bed."

I walk over to the door and place my hand over hers. It is late, I should have waited until the morning to come over. "I'll be here tomorrow." I say. This is an awkward situation. Should I give her a hug goodnight? A kiss? A pat on the back? I result to a quick kiss on the cheek. Her face turns bright red and I can't help but laugh. She's just so damn cute. "Sweet dreams, Ana." I say before walking out the door and into the chilly night air.

Once I', in my car, I glance back to see that Ana is still standing in the doorway watching me. I wave goodbye and she waves back. As I pull away I glance back in my mirror to see that she's still watching me. Before she's out of sight she places her hand on her cheek. Right where I kissed her.