Chapter Seventeen

Imperfectly Compatible

I latched the window shut, watching James's owl soar off into the sky and disappear.

"Sending love letters, Gracie?"

I jumped as I felt Sirius brush up beside me and I sighed wearily. "Yes, to Remus. I miss him already." I stuck my tongue out and stalked away.

"Okay, okay!" he chirped, trailing after me. "Who was it to?"

"My parents," I answered simply.

"Oh," he said, nodding his head and digging his hands in his pockets. "I already knew you've got a thing for Peter, anyway."

"Sirius!" I gasped furiously, and I reached out to slap him on the arm, but he darted away at the sound of James belting out from across the house.

"SIRIUS! GRACIE! GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW FOR SUPPER, YOU BUNCH OF LAZY ARSE LARDS—ow, Mum, what was that for?"

I glared at Sirius. "This is not over."

He ducked out of the room before I could do anything else, laughing manically. I arrived after him in the dining room and let out a little breath. Sirius hopped down at the table where everyone was already seated and nestled his way in like it was home.

"Gracie, dear, did Brisbie give you any trouble?" Mrs. Potter asked.

I sat down in the empty seat across from Sirius and next to Lily, and answered with a smile, "No, she's a great owl. Didn't bite me, which all the darn owls always seem to like to do. So, yep, great, thank you."

"No problem," she assured with a smile of her own. She was very motherly in all aspects; she and Mr. Potter were somewhat on the older side, but they were still quite friendly and lively.

James's parents started passing around the food—"Tuck in now," Mrs. Potter had said—and James and Sirius attacked it all, loading their plates. Lily giggled, taking everything timidly, and I followed her lead, feeling like a lost pet.

It was odd, being dragged into all of this. I had never been very close to James, and that made me feel like I didn't quite belong. I was just Lily's friend. I met eyes with Sirius who already had his mouth full, and he smiled guiltily. Okay, I admitted as I laughed at the look on his face, I'm also just Sirius's friend.

"So, Lily," Mr. Potter started, and James hesitated in his frantic food shoveling. It went by unnoticed. "It's so great to finally meet you. James has been talking about you every other breath for years, but when we went years without ever seeing you, we were beginning to wonder if you existed!"

The two parents laughed, and Lily flushed, smiling coyly. She brushed her hair out of her face and looked as if she was trying to come up with an appropriate response. James groaned, burying his face in his palm.

Sirius shot me a kick under the table and I winced.

"One galleon," he mouthed.

I contorted my face, suppressing an outburst as I remembered the bet from yesterday. He only winked and turned away.

Mrs. Potter folded her napkin, then glanced to Sirius and then to me. "Forgive me if I'm wrong, Gracie, dear, but we've never met you, either. Are you here with Sirius?" I felt my eyes grow wide unconsciously. "Is this like a double date? You children are odd these days, so you never know…"

Lily was choking on a laugh beside me as I felt my face change color. "Oh, no," I said quickly, focusing my panicked gaze on Mrs. Potter. I could not wander off and look at Sirius at a time like this. "Just a friend."

"Actually, she's seeing Peter," Sirius piped up, and my attempt to not look over at him fell immediately. "I caught her sending him a letter only earlier."

Strangled mirth was coming from both sides of the table as James and Lily attempted to control themselves from bursting out hysterically.

"Oh, Peter. I remember him," Mrs. Potter said fondly. "He was quite a sweet boy."

I tensed in my seat, glaring at Sirius. "I told you I was sending a letter to Remus, not Peter."

James sobered suddenly, staring. "Wait, so you're seeing Remus?"

"No! Merlin, Sirius, this is all your fault—"

He didn't hear me, though, because he was laughing too hard at his own incredibly genius joke.

I inhaled. "I'm sorry," I said to Mrs. Potter. "I'm not seeing anyone, despite what Sirius likes to make up."

"Well, that's all right," she replied happily, "Peter is a sweet boy, though."

"Of course," I agreed. I proceeded to take a large bite of food so that my mouth would be occupied and I wouldn't have to say anything more.

"Why didn't you invite Remus or Peter, James?" Mr. Potter asked.

James swallowed, and looked up nonchalantly. "Because they have families of their own. Besides, you saw them last year for Christmas."

"Well, it is awfully nice to have some young company around the house," Mrs. Potter commented. "You should visit in the summer, girls. Keep the boys from stirring up trouble as they always seem so prone to doing."

"I'm afraid we can't stop them on most days," Lily admitted.

"But, you should know that James has really wised up this year. Very responsible Head Boy." I nodded to him, taking a sip from my glass.

"Yeah," Sirius agreed. "Probably helps that Lily is Head Girl."

James groaned again and his parents only laughed lightheartedly.

The evening proceeded as such, jokes and idle conversation tossed around the table, until a good portion of the food had disappeared and the sun had sunk far into the horizon.

"Oh, before I've forgotten," Mr. Potter said suddenly as we collected the plates and moved them into the kitchen, "We've only got two spare beds, so I'm afraid one of you will have to take the couch."

"I suppose we'll just leave you three to fight over that one. We've got wizard's chess in the living room if you need to take it to a match," said Mrs. Potter.

Lily, Sirius and I all shared a long glance, waiting for someone to sacrifice themselves up to the couch. We all stood on the edge until I internally decided that I might as well just offer myself, seeing as I didn't mind, and so I said, "I'll take the couch," in the same moment that Sirius offered.

We stared at each other.

"That's fine, I'll take it," I said.

"No, no, I insist," Sirius combated.

"Sirius, don't be difficult—"

Lily laughed, saying something off to the side about how she thought we'd be fighting over the beds, not the couch.

"You're the one being difficult here."

"Stop trying to be the noble knight in shining armor here—"

Lily said, "They actually always bicker like this."

"I'm not trying anything! I just want the couch."

"Why in the world would you want the couch?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because the bed's more comfortable!"

"Then why don't you?"

"Why should I?"

"Fine!" he exclaimed, throwing his hands up. "Wizard's chess it is."

I gaped. "You know I'm terrible at that game."

"Well, it can't be helped. If you win, you get the couch."

"Sirius, you always beat me! That's not fair!"

Mr. Potter smiled broadly, looking like he was anticipating a good game. "I'll go get the board."

We all moved to the living room, and after consecutive checks and close-calls and many rapid turn of events, Mrs. Potter, Lily, and James all declared themselves exhausted and dismissed themselves to their separate quarters.

And then, roughly forty-two minutes later, I was screaming victoriously.

"I BEAT YOU! I FINALLY BEAT YOU, SIRIUS BLACK! AFTER SEVEN YEARS! HA! HA! HAAA!"

"What an incredible game, Gracie," Mr. Potter commended.

I beamed with pride. "Thank you, Mr. Potter."

"And you too, Sirius, of course. I'll be back with the sheets for the couch in a moment, Gracie."

When he left, Sirius looked at me, pouting. "I don't see why you're so giddy. You won a week on the couch."

"Well," I said, and pressed my lips together, "I showed you, and that's all that matters."

"Mhm. Impressive."

"Thank you."

"I was being sarcastic."

"I'm going to pretend as if I didn't hear that."

"I think we should have a rematch," Sirius decided aloud. "Later. Tomorrow."

"I think not," I countered swiftly.

"Why? Afraid of losing? Because you know that I am the chess master?"

"Go to sleep. Let me bask in my glory. Oh, thank you, Mr. Potter," I said as he brought the sheets for me.

"Sure," he replied briskly. "Goodnight, you two. Better get to bed."

"Okay, goodnight," we said in unison as he left again.

I spread the sheets over the couch and dropped the pillow emphatically. "Are you planning on standing there all night?" I asked as I moved to get my things to get ready for the night.

"Nope. Gonna get cozy in my bed."

I just rolled my eyes and bumped him with my hip playfully as I passed on my way to the bathroom. I went and changed into my nightclothes, brushed my teeth and hair, washed my face, and skipped back out, feeling bright and rejuvenated. I walked back into the room and found it empty, and congratulated myself silently on my victory while dropping down onto the couch.

I was about to sprawl out across the sheets when Lily burst into the room and leaped on the couch, knocking me out of the way in the process. She giggled, "Woops, sorry!"

I blinked, reorienting myself. "Have you taken any illegal substances, Lily?" I squinted my eyes, inspecting.

She took a deep breath. "What? No. I just wanted to ask if you thought his parents liked me." James's parents, she meant.

"Oh, yeah. They were absolutely gushing. You're the best thing they could hope for, I bet."

"Gushing." She giggled. "That's a bit of an exaggeration. So I didn't look like a mental case or anything?"

"Nope. They won't find out about that part until after you two are married, at least." I winked at her.

She sighed with aggravation, but smiled and sank into the back of the couch. "Okay. That's all. I just couldn't contain myself." She turned to me. "So, how are you and Sirius?" She wiggled her eyebrows.

I reddened. "We are fantastic," I answered dismissively.

"Seems like it. James told me you looked about ready to snog the faces off each other yesterday."

"Did not!" I hissed.

She giggled again. I wondered absentmindedly if that was a disease and if so, if it was contagious. "Well, I'm not making that up. He really did say that."

I grumbled. She definitely had some sort of disease.

"So, did you kiss him?"

I glared. "No."

"Have you told him you fancy him?"

"No."

"Did you almost kiss him?"

"How do you almost kiss someone?"

"I don't know." She eyed me warily. "You did, didn't you?"

"Kiss him? No."

"Almost?"

"There is no such thing."

"You did! You almost kissed Sirius!" She gasped, backing away from me to properly evaluate my face in her shock. "This is controversial! This changes everything! You two are so close! This is strange! This—"

"Shhh!" I swatted at her fussily.

She just continued to giggle. I named her disease Compulsive Gigglitus. I would suggest she get checked out at St. Mungo's if the her case seemed to progress. "Oh, why did you ever want Kenneth? Sirius is so much better for you."

I buried my face in my pillow and said, "Shut up," but it sounded more like, Uhh buuuuhhh.

"No, really! You've always got this adorable smile when you're with him. Even if you're being mean or bickering or attacking him. It's always there with him."

I raised my head. "I'm going to murder you in your sleep."

"See, even now!" She proclaimed, waving her hands around energetically. "Just at the thought of him."

I closed my eyes and fell back in defeat.

"Well, I really am exhausted… and we've got another full day ahead of us. I suppose I'll let little Gracie get to sleep." She tousled my hair and stood. "See you tomorrow! Sweet dreams, goodnight!" She squealed with excitement, hugged me, and then left the room in a happy daze.

I threw my blanket over my face and tried to remember when she hadn't been so excitable and girly. And giggly. Oh, dear, James had infected her mind.

No, that wasn't true. She'd always been that way. Now she just didn't stop being that way. I didn't mind, though, not really; it made me smile to see her that way, as much as I tried to hide it. She was cute. Especially with James.

The silence overwhelmed me, long moments lapsing onto another, and I felt myself falling out of consciousness until the sound of soft, approaching footsteps broke through.

"Lily, do you not understand the concept of goodnight?"

There was the sound of something light thudding to the ground. "Perhaps not."

I lowered the blanket. "Oh, Lily, what happened to you? You're starting to look like a man."

Sirius rubbed his chin with pride. "Well thank you."

I clicked my tongue. "James won't kiss you now."

He scrunched up his face. "You know, he never was a good kisser anyhow."

I laughed loudly, rolling over onto my stomach as Sirius sat down on the blanket he'd laid on the floor. I glanced at him questioningly.

"The sky looks wicked out here at night. This room has the best window." He gestured to the window on the wall opposite of us. "But you were being bloody stubborn and wouldn't give me the couch."

I glanced out the window momentarily, and then back to him. "I was just being polite at first, and then you made it like it was a game, so I couldn't back down." I grinned sheepishly. "Sorry. We can trade if you want."

"No," he said, "now you're stuck here. You got yourself in this. Have fun on the couch."

I sighed. "Oh well. Have fun on the floor then." We were silent for a moment, and I took note of his sleeping materials. "Do you want another blanket? Merlin knows you get cold easily."

"Then you'll be cold," he pointed out.

"Okay, compromise. Scoot over." He did, and I seemed to function without really thinking. I climbed down next to him, dragging my pillow and blanket with me. "We can share," I offered, and there was a great, bright light blinking in my head that was trying desperately to warn me, but I just looked at Sirius with a smile and ignored it. I tossed him the other side of the blanket and he took it gratefully.

"You really do care more than you let on," he teased, smiling back widely.

"Maybe sometimes. But so help me, Sirius, if you snore, I will put a silencing charm on you in your sleep and then I might just choke you."

"Same for you," he said, "but I might just smother you with your pillow instead. That's more my style."

I rolled my eyes. "Very stylish choice."

"I do pride myself on my style," Sirius agreed heartily.

I exhaled, burying myself in blankets. "Go to sleep. Before I choke you and silence you. But not in that order."

"Fine. Goodnight, Gracie."

"Night, Sirius."

I nestled in the spot next to him, leaving a good feasible distance between the two of us. The light in my head had been skillfully ignored at first, but it was blaring in my vision now. The only sound in the room was our soft breathing and my obnoxiously loud heartbeat. I prayed that he might not be able to hear it.

"Gracie?"

I grunted. "Sirius."

"I'm cold."

I peeked my eyes open at him, observing his pleading face. "And tell me what exactly you want me to do about that?" I had meant it sarcastically, but it proved to be more stupid than anything else.

"Come here?"

Two little words. My heart hammered and I tried not to stare in disbelief, but everything stopped. He opened his arms, reaching out for me, and I vaguely wondered if I was already asleep and this was some kind of cruel dream.

Well, I slipped into the spot he made for me just in case I wasn't sleeping. Just in case. To be safe and all.

My thoughts became incoherent and I struggled to say something that sounded slightly intelligent or clever. But, instead, I found my mouth working without me, and I mumbled, "Why are you always so cold?" before I could stop myself. Perhaps not intelligent or clever, but he wrapped his arms around me and didn't seem to mind. I was glad for the closeness, because there was no way he could see the blush that had overwhelmed my face.

His breath tickled at my skin and sent shivers down my spine and did not help my sense of control whatsoever.

"Because," he answered, only a murmur, "I don't keep my personal heater around with me all the time."

I laughed, gazing up at him. "Is that all I am to you?"

"Hm. Maybe something more," he mused, looking me at me thoughtfully. The pause made my stomach flip. "Maybe a very nice personal heater."

"Aww, you're a sweetheart," I said, mock flattered, and closed my eyes again. I was enveloped in the warmth of his arms around me and leaned my head against his chest, deciding that if this was a dream, it was a very, very cruel dream.

He hummed an inaudible response, and we both fell silent, worlds of dark surrounding us. After a few longer moments, I heard him say, "Goodnight, Gracie."

"Night," I whispered.

I was falling back into the wonderful lands of slumber when I felt him kiss my forehead. The feeling of his lips on my skin lingered, even long after he had pulled away, and my body burned with electricity. "Thought I owed you that after the night in the hospital wing," he teased.

I flinched, and punched him in the stomach without force to hide my embarrassment. He hadn't really been asleep that night. Oh, Merlin.

He only laughed.

And that's the sound I fell asleep to, Sirius's laugh, drifting through my quiet mind and beckoning me into the black night.

The next morning I woke slowly, drifting in and out of sleep continuously. I would just lie there, peek my eyes open, glance at Sirius's face, laugh, and then fall right back asleep. His arms had fallen from around me, but rested between the two of us instead, gently touching my own arms and emanating heat that rose to my cheeks.

When I woke and he wasn't there, though, I took the opportunity to steal the blanket all for myself and curl around it. I'd closed my eyes again quickly and basked in silent accomplishment when James's voice jolted through the silence.

"I don't think she's awake," he said, and I held my breath, going as still as possible. I didn't want to wake up yet, so I decided to just pretend. "Are you, Gracie?"

I heard someone shift and I imagined they were examining my face. I had practiced this often as a child. I could still pull off a sleeping face. No one would know. I could just go back to sleep without being bothered…

"She's asleep," Sirius said, and I felt odd sparks run up and down my arms. Random.

"All I'm saying," said James, seeming as if he was continuing on a tangent he'd started earlier, "is that you should be glad that I'm the one that walked on this, Padfoot."

"I already told you what happened," Sirius groaned, and it was a peculiar sound. A mix of impatience and irritation. Something he didn't normally sound like with James.

"It still doesn't make sense, though," James argued. "I mean, you're acting really strange lately, aren't you? First, you were talking rubbish about her boyfriend every chance you got. Then you're always staring at her like you've gone mental and now you're snuggling up with her because you want to see the stars that were just the same as they were yesterday and will be just the same tomorrow."

"Prongs, shut it, you'll wake her," he hissed. Sirius didn't point out that stars are always changing, as they're big, bright, brilliant balls of gas, but maybe he didn't know.

James's words were very… very… foreign. Ambiguous, also, I made note to remind myself, but not too ambiguous. It seemed to be glaring at me, desperate for my attention, and I wanted to acknowledge it, but I shied away from what was sitting in front of me and decided James was talking about something entirely different. Something that had nothing to do with me.

Even though it obviously was me…

But, what? I'd thought something about Sirius seemed odd, but what was James saying? There was no way on Earth that I could just assume anything like that…

"Anyway," Sirius said, and I nearly flinched at the interruption of my thoughts. "You're right. I have."

"Have what?"

"Gone mental."

Just another two words, and my heart went as still as my body. His voice sounded years away.

"No, mate, wouldn't say you've gone mental," James countered, and then sniggered. "Not yet, anyway."

I heard someone get to their feet. "It's no matter. I'm not planning on… ruining anything."

My mouth felt dry. I had no idea what to even feel. Wasn't I supposed to be rejoicing? Where was all this dread coming from? I suddenly wanted to vomit.

I stirred in my spot and the room was silent. I waited, longing to calm my mind and my pulsing heart, until the silence was too overwhelming and I braced myself to face them. I waited for minutes, agonizing minutes that felt like hours.

I opened my eyes, and the room was empty.

Later that afternoon, James's owl, Brisbie, returned in front of me, pecking at me with her sharp beak. There was a letter in her beak, and I stared without comprehending before I took it from her. The day had passed normally before that. James's parents had gone out to buy last minute gifts and get groceries for dinner, and we'd been alone for a majority of the day. James had dragged us to a lake by his house and then Sirius had complained that it was 'too bloody cold to think' and we'd all run back inside and made hot chocolate.

"Thank you," I said to Brisbie, a bit awkwardly. I didn't have any owl treats, and she seemed to be waiting for one. Lily glanced over at Brisbie and then to me.

"I'll ask Mrs. Potter if she has any treats," she supplied helpfully, and I thanked her before she left the room.

I gingerly opened the letter and glazed over the thin writing.

Dear Grace,

It's lovely that your friend has invited you to stay at his house for the holiday. I hope you get on well with his parents and behave. I wouldn't want to hear from them about you causing any trouble.

Your father and I have been talking lately and we'd like to ask that you come visit home for the Yule holiday, if you will. We know that you're visiting your friends, but it is important to your father and I that we speak to you about some things. It's all right if you choose not to, but if you would consider it, we'd greatly appreciate it.

Write back with your answer as soon as you can.

Mum

I stared blankly at the letter, and bit my knuckles to contain myself. A feeling loomed over me suddenly and I started trembling. The longer I stared at the writing, the more terrible and haunted I felt.

"Gracie, what's wrong?" Lily returned with a treat for Brisbie, who accepted it heartily and hopped away. Lily rushed to my side and wrapped an arm around me.

At the gesture, I gave in and the tears overflowed.

"Oh, you're crying! Gracie! Is everything all right? What did the letter…" She glanced at the writing warily, and her expression seemed to guess that someone died or something tragic of the sort.

I shook my head quickly, gathering a breath and wiping my face. "It's nothing, it was just my parents. And I'm…surprised."

"Surprised?"

"My parents asked me to spend Christmas with them. Well, not the whole break."

She raised an eyebrow.

"I just, didn't expect it. I'm a little overwhelmed, and… confused…"

"So am I. Are you all right?"

I nodded. "It's just, you know, my parents." I looked at her and bit my lip to control myself, but the thoughts spilled back into my head and the tears were hot in my eyes. No control at all. I'd never spoken to anyone about my parents because I didn't know how to explain it, but before I could always hide it when I was upset. Now I was practically bawling and I couldn't even form a comprehensible explanation.

Sirius and James came in then, and if I had any more coherence, I would have been cursing my luck. They'd been laughing but stopped dead in their tracks at the sight of the two of us.

"Lily!" Sirius gasped. "Why did you make Gracie cry?" He was only teasing, but he looked geniuinely concerned as well. "Gracie, why are you crying?"

I shook my head again, determined to get a grip on myself, but Sirius rushed over and it happened all over again. I was crying waterfalls from my eyes and it could not have been pretty at all.

Sirius took me in his arms, stealing me from Lily, and held me against him. "What's wrong, love?"

I hiccupped, suddenly feeling very dizzy. My mind swarmed. I wanted to concentrate on that feeling of his arms around me, that feeling that was becoming so familiar lately. Or the fact that he'd called me 'love.'

Love… oh, Merlin, that made me cry harder.

But I could hardly concentrate on any of that. My thoughts bounced from telling myself that this was a good sign, that my parents wanted to reconcile things, that no matter how much I'd ruined things in the past, I could reconcile with them, we could be happy again, we could start over, I didn't have to be scared, I didn't have to be someone I wasn't, I didn't, I wouldn't, they wouldn't make me, but what if they did? Then what did I do? And why now? What? Why was I even crying? But I hadn't spoken to them since summer! And now. Now…

"Oh, ah…" I heard James's unsteady voice, somewhere far from me. "I think I heard my name. Hm, Lily, let's go see if my parents need something."

There was a shuffling of feet and then it was quiet, just heartbeats and breathing. Sirius stroked my hair, rubbing circles in the small of my back.

"It's nothing," I murmured finally. "Nothing really. I'm overreacting."

He made a noise like he didn't believe a word I said. "What is it?"

I inhaled, the scent of coconut and ginger all wrapping into one. Sirius and the house. A pleasant scent. Calming. "My parents."

"Are they okay?"

"They're fine," I said quietly. "They want me to go see them. Before I go back to school."

He seemed to hesitate. "Well, that's great."

"I know." I took another deep breath and steadied myself. No more tears. No more tears… "I just freaked out. It's, I don't know… a lot of pressure. I can't… handle this."

"How so?"

It took all of my strength to wriggle out of his grip and face him. He looked into my eyes, sincerity everywhere in the grey depths, and I wanted to fall back into his chest and not say another word. But I didn't. "I dunno really," I admitted, and wrapped my arms around myself self-consciously. "My family's just messed up. Distant."

"Hm." He internalized it in silence.

I was grateful that my eyes had dried now, and I wiped the tears from my face, willing the scratchiness away. "And then I see James's family, and the way they adore him. And I think of Lily's family, and the way they're so proud of her for being a witch…"

Sirius met my gaze again and held it firmly. "Think of my parents. That ought to cheer you up." He smiled, but sadly.

I frowned. "I'm sorry. I'm… I didn't mean to sound insensitive."

"You didn't," he assured me, smiling a bit brighter this time. "My parents are like yours in a way. Except I don't live with them anymore, of course."

I sighed and leaned my head on his shoulder. He didn't say anything, and neither did I. The silence was comfortable and it was all that I wanted. Just a moment with Sirius, knowing he was here for me to lean on. That was all I wanted. All I needed, really.

"I don't want to talk about me," I decided. "Tell me about your family."

"Why?"

"You've never told me about your family."

"You've never told me about yours," he replied easily.

"I guess I just never saw the need," I admitted, and it was true. It wasn't necessary.

"I only ever told James," Sirius said quietly, voice hitting a tone I hadn't ever quite heard before. "Because he'd pester me constantly as to why I couldn't visit over the summer. He wouldn't let up. So I told him. Remus and Peter know some, but just bits and pieces. I just never fancied wasting my breath on the subject."

"You can waste your breath on it now."

He paused, thoughtfully, perhaps, and then asked, "What do you want to know?"

I bit my lip. "Why did you run away?"

I felt his shoulder stiffen, but only slightly. "Because I'd suffered enough abuse. Not just verbal." He looked at the ground. "Never was quite what they wanted. Pissed 'em off to no end. Mum probably blasted my name of the bloody family tree. She likes to do that," he muttered crossly. "What haven't you run away?"

He posed the question like it was a normal thing, running away. "Because I've never…needed to. Life isn't unlivable. I'm fed and all. No one's ever hit me, except for once, when Mum was livid. But I… I dunno. I've just never been adored. I wasn't abused." I looked at him for a long moment, feeling guilty. "But I kind of do run away, you know? I go to school for months at a time and don't see my parents. Don't even write, except when I need to."

"That's what I told myself for years." Sirius exhaled. "But even the short months during the summer were too much. I ended up just shaming the whole lot. The Ancient and Noble House of Black. Shamed them." He smiled despite it, like it was something to be proud of. "Why did your mum ever hit you?"

I straightened, collecting myself. "It was after first year… I asked her if she'd show me a bit of magic… Just one spell. She refused. Said I was a savage, a brute… And I got upset with her and took my wand and made all her pots and pans disappear." I paused, the memory lighting beneath my eyelids. "She slapped me across the face when I got a warning from the Ministry for underage magic. She hates the Ministry. They scare her out of her wits. But then she shouted at me to bring the pots and pans back anyways."

He stared at me. "Did you?"

"No," I answered simply. "I reminded her that the Ministry would contact us again if I did and she sent me to my room for cheek. The pots and pans were back the next day, though."

"How?"

I shrugged. "I guess she had no choice but to use magic. I never asked."

"And both your mum and dad are magical?"

I nodded. "Pureblooded, too."

"Hachette… that's an odd one. I don't remember it. I studied all the Pureblood surnames for years. My parents forced me."

"The Hachettes are an American family. You probably didn't study American lineage, did you?"

"Oh, no. You're American? You don't talk funny." He raised a brow.

I smiled and shook my head. "Just my dad. My mum's English, and I was born here. Mum's an Abbott."

"Well, I know them," Sirius said. "Aunt Cassiopeia used to tell me that the Abbotts were disgraceful because they were an ancient and pure line until they started marrying muggles." He laughed to himself, running a hand through his hair. "So your parents are basically pureblooded muggles then?"

"Basically," I said. "They're…unique."

"What Houses were they?"

"Mum was Ravenclaw, Dad was Hufflepuff."

"Which House did they want you in?"

I shrugged. "They never even told me their Houses. I had detention one night in second year and found it in Filch's files. Records of house points when they were in school."

"Hm," was all Sirius said, and he leaned back against the wall, looking lost in thought. "Your parents are quite exceptional, I would say." He eyed me cautiously. "Why do they live as muggles, anyway?"

"They'd never speak of it. They only thing Mum ever did tell me was that she thought I was becoming evil like the rest of the witches and wizards in the world. She said it a lot when she was angry."

"What about your dad?"

"He doesn't ever say much. He's always working. Drinking, staying out late… Mum told me once in one of her rages that he's home much more often when I'm gone."

He looked surprised, and I felt a pain in my stomach.

"But they don't hit me," I said gently. "It can't be as bad as your house."

"Well, I don't live there anymore, so that helps things." He grinned.

"What did they do to you?"

He nestled into his spot. "Well. When I got home for summer after first year, my father was so outraged that I'd been sorted into the House of 'blood traitors and mudbloods' that he'd beat me over the head whenever I did something slightly out of line. He was always strict, but he went insane after that. My mum would lecture me every night on the importance of blood purity and Salazar Slytherin's nobility. And when I didn't listen, she'd slap me." He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Needless to say, I didn't listen all that often."

"Oh, Sirius, you moron. You just hurt yourself needlessly. You could have at least pretended to listen."

He shrugged. "I enjoyed annoying them. I hung up all sorts of obnoxious things in my room. And I'd get in trouble and the professors would write home, and they'd be furious. But then the professors stopped writing home because it didn't really solve any issues."

I sighed. "Defiant little bugger."

"Hey, you used to cause trouble with me. You'd hang around James and me all the time, don't you remember?"

"Of course I do," I said. "And then you two befriended Remus and Peter, and Peter though I was a nutcase for months so he wouldn't even speak to me." I rolled my eyes, finding a smile. "And I'd hang around with Lily, when she wasn't with Mary or Snape."

"Mmh." I was grateful he didn't make a Snivellus comment. He tilted his head back and staring at the ceiling. "You and I, Gracie, we're failures of children. At least from our parents' point of view. We're pretty compatible, you know?"

"I don't know about compatible. But we're definitely something."

He nudged me in the shoulder, and I just laughed, falling back into his side. He turned to me, brushing his hand across my face as if he was checking for tears. And we looked at eachother for a moment, searching each other's eyes for something, until I just smiled and leaned back into him.

What would I have done without this boy?

I pushed the letter away, longing for it to leave my mind for good. I'd deal with it later. With a brave face. When I found one.

A/N:

I CAN BE YOUR HERO BAAABAY, I CAN KISS AWAY THE PAIN, I WILL STAND BY YOU FOREVER, YOU CAN TAKE MY BREATH AWAAAAAYYYYY

Heh, can you tell I listened to Hero by Enrique Iglesias on repeat while writing this? It's stuck in my head, like, forever :x

Well I don't care, you're here tonight…I CAN BE YOUR HERO, BABY

Just kidding, that was good ol' Enrique again. Anyways, thanks so much for reading and THANK YOU bunches to everyone who's reviewed and especially to the favoriters/alerters 'cus there seems to be more of you than the other. Which is not necessarily good but I'll take what I can get.

Leave a review and I'll never sing Enrique Iglesias to you again? :) teehee

And also big sorry that I didn't get this update out sooner! I was busy all week and stuff and I got home exhausted every day and my summer's gradually getting more hectic and etc so updates will probably be slower but I promise I'll get them out eventually. And if they're slow, most likely they'll be tremendously long like this one! I actually wanted to include more… sorry if I killed anyone with this. OKAY BYE FOR NOW