Chapter 16

A Difficult Past

The minute morning came Rona was already up milling about their room getting dressed. She sat down at the desk and pulled her journal full of notes out then leaned back and dug through one of Bishop's shirt pockets searching for the map. She pulled it out noisily and spread it across the desk.

Bishop stirred and sat up rubbing his eyes and yawning, "Ugh, is it morning already? What are you doing?"

"We've got a busy day ahead of us and I want to get moving as soon as possible," she said.

"We're just going to Whiterun," he groaned, "We've got plenty of time to get there, what's the rush?"

She looked over at him and said, "We can't leave Eastmarch yet, we still have a lot to do."

He leaned back on the bed and threw her a stern look, "What the hell are you talking about woman?"

"I already told you, I met a lot of people yesterday and listened to their problems."

He looked at her with heavily lidded eyes and said, "And?"

Rona spoke quickly, listing off everything all at once, "So we have a lot of places to go! There's something called the White Phial we're going to search for, I told the local alchemist I'd find it, he's really ill otherwise he'd do it himself. I need to see if anyone has an Amulet of Arkay too, I told a nice old man I'd bring him one for his wife, they're mourning their daughter - she was murdered by The Butcher last month - speaking of I want to talk to the guards about that, see if we can't help out somehow to solve it. Oh! We also need to kill off a bandit leader that's been causing problems for the locals and someone mentioned that there was a dragon sighted nearby Shearpoint Mountain..."

She rambled on and on and Bishop just stared at her open-mouthed, the scowl growing fiercer on his face by the second. At one point he finally threw a hand up and said, "SLOW DOWN! First of all, when did you decide all of this? And second, what makes you think I'm going to come along and do any of this?"

She was focused on marking the map and determining the best route to take for each task as she said, "You don't have to come if you don't want to. You can stay here, I can handle most of these tasks myself, although I wouldn't mind your help with the dragon."

His eye twitched slightly and he leaned forward, rubbing his forehead in his hands as he groaned, "Okay...fine. I'll go. But what's in it for us? What do we get for doing all this?"

She was busy drawing out a smaller map of Eastmarch in her journal and tracing out their route when she stopped a moment to look over at him and grinned, "Gold of course! That and the personal satisfaction of doing a good deed for someone else!"

He looked entirely apathetic, "What do you care about finding someone's long lost spoon or their gran's old hat? Why are we even helping these people?"

"It's called compassion Bishop, you should try it sometime," she said as she finished the final details on her map. She snapped up her journal, folded the map and got up from her seat, grabbing Bishop's shirt and tossing it to him. "Better hurry up," she said, "We've got a busy week ahead of us and I want to get started as soon as possible!"

They started their journey in the south of Eastmarch, around the badlands and hot springs. Rona insisted they trek through every cave, ruin and climb every mountain to not only complete their given tasks but to simply explore. She was not far off on this either as she found several Word Walls hidden deep inside the caves and ruins. They faced off against their fair share of dragons as well.

Each battle took its toll on them, but with each new Word of Power learned she was that much stronger. She was finally able to complete her knowledge of Frost Breath which really came in handy when combating dragons that had breaths of flame.

She was starting to worry about Bishop though, who, despite keeping up with her physically, was mildly injured numerous times. She'd heal him up right and apologize profusely, though he'd say nothing at the time, later he'd remark about how much trouble she was for always dragging him around dangerous Dwemer ruins and deep into dark caves.

His lewd remarks were becoming more aggressive as well, taking every chance he got to comment on the gait of her swaying hips and her sweet ass in front of him. She took it in stride however, knowing it was just his way of easing his sexual frustration. Soon, she thought after a particularly passionate kiss from Bishop. He'd cornered her after they cleared out a cave and pulled her into his arms, kissing her with such ferocity that his facial stubble rubbed her raw. Perhaps he was taking his reward for putting up with all the danger she'd put him in. She didn't mind it, in fact she was becoming entirely too eager as well.

One day, as they made their way back to Windhelm, they noticed the khajiit caravans passing through and Rona insisted they stop to replenish their potion stock. She was met with great hospitality from Ahkari and her companions. Rona was pleased to see little Nakir getting along fine, happy as could be. The boy shyly thanked her for saving him and then immediately asked if he could pet her dog. She smiled brightly at him and let him pat Karnwyr's back. The wolf was as amiable as ever and licked Nakir's face. Even Bishop smiled slightly watching the two interact and Rona left him in charge of supervising them while she stepped over to look at Ahkari's wares.

"Greetings Lady Dragonborn," Ahkari smiled at her, displaying her pointed teeth, "What can Ahkari do for you today?"

"I need to replenish my stores of healing and stamina potions. I think I'll take a few for magic as well, just to be safe," Rona said, handing her a list.

"Staying busy I see," Ahkari said as she perused the list and began gathering the items from their wagon. She wrapped up a bundle of potions for her while conversing lightly, "I've heard you took down quite a few dragons in the region. We appreciate that, it makes traveling between the cities much safer for us."

"I'm glad," Rona said, pleased to hear it but her mind was elsewhere, "By the way..."

"Hm? What is it?" Ahkari noticed the young woman blushing and brought her voice down an octave, "Go on dear, is there something else you need?"

Rona took a breath and said in hushed tones, "Do you have any...contraceptive tonics?"

Ahkari glanced over at Bishop who'd sat down on a rock and was showing little Nakir his knife and telling him a story about one of their recent adventures. The khajiit boy was enthralled as he stared at the silver dagger, still gently patting Karnwyr on the back with a paw.

A broad grin sprawled across Ahkari's lips only making Rona blush even harder. "Your companion...he is very handsome for a nord. Let me see what I can get you," Ahkari climbed into the wagon and dug through a chest, tossing jewelry, trinkets and other assorted items aside when finally she pulled out three tiny crystal bottles and came back over laying them out for Rona, "Ever used anything like this before?"

Rona averted her gaze as she said, "Um...no. How do they work?"

Ahkari explained as matter-of-factly as possible, trying to keep the poor Dragonborn from burning up in flames of embarrassment, "You only need one a month. It works through a full three weeks of your cycle until your next menses. Once your menses has finished you drink another to start again. But you must stay on top of it, as soon as your bleeding ends you must take another. Any more or any less makes it ineffective."

"How effective is it? Is there any chance...?"

"The chances are very low. Be sure to start it after your next menses. It must be at the beginning of your cycle. Give it a day for your body to adjust. You should be fine after that."

Rona paid the woman and quickly stuffed the three bottles into her pouch. Her next period wasn't due for another week so she'd have to wait. Ahkari finished wrapping up the other potions and Rona thanked her. The khajiit woman gave her a wry smile, "Enjoy yourself Dragonborn! You certainly deserve it after all you've done for Skyrim."

As Rona walked back over to their horses and started organizing the potions into their saddle bags she noticed Bishop getting quite excited telling his story to Nakir. He dipped an arm through the air and said, "Shoulda seen it! That overgrown lizard came sailing right down at us breathing wave after wave of fire, but Ladyshi- er, the Dragonborn, she breathed right back at it with freezing blasts of ice! She froze over the dragon's snout and as it came swooping down she used her magic to lift herself off the ground and landed right on its face, stabbing the vicious thing right in the eyes!"

Nakir's eyes were lit up in wonder, "What did you do Bishop!?"

"Well naturally I ran along and started picking it off with my bow as it flew off into the sky with her," he pulled his bow out, showing the boy and nocked an arrow to it, just to demonstrate, "I couldn't let the dragon make off with the lovely Dragonborn and so I punctured it's wings with arrows. It couldn't stay up anymore and crashed down to the ground, face first into the mountainside!"

"But - what about the Dragonborn!? Was she okay?"

"She leapt off it's back before it crashed and I saw her, falling to the ground so fast she would've splattered all over it - so I ran over and caught her right out of the sky saving her!"

"Wow! That's amazing! I wish I was as brave as you..."

Rona was surprised by how well he was getting along with the boy. He actually seemed to be enjoying himself. Bishop even pulled out a small memento from his pocket and said, "Here, it's a scale from the dragon. I was going to give it to the Lady Lightfoot, but I think it suits you better."

He draped a thin string with a large dragon scale and some beads on it over the boy's head. Nakir was completely dazzled by it, sporting the widest grin any little boy could.

"Thanks!"

Bishop stood up and pat the boy on the shoulder and said, "Take good care of it kid. We'll see you around sometime, I'll have another story for you then."

Nakir shouted, "Bye!" and ran off towards his mother.

Bishop came over and mounted Whiskey while Rona pulled herself up on Karinda. They were only a few paces away from the caravan when Rona said, "You saved me from splattering all over the ground, huh?"

He laughed and said, "Well, it sounds better than you saving my ass all the time. Besides, you always get to be the hero, I'd like to be the heroic one for a change."

She smirked and asked him, "What was that necklace you gave him?"

"Ah that. Well I was trying to collect dragon scales to make a necklace for you but those dragons burn up so quick that I'd only gotten one so far. I sort of gave up on the thing, figured he'd like it."

"That was really sweet of you."

Bishop smirked, "Yeah well, he's a good kid. He reminds me of...someone I knew a long time ago."

"Ah yes," Rona said sarcastically, "Vague allusions to your past. Hmm."

He frowned at her, "What? That's not good enough?"

"I just wish you'd tell me more," she said plainly, "You pretty much know my life story, but you? You're still a complete mystery to me."

He sighed, "It's...hard to talk about. Not worth remembering."

"But it's part of who you are Bishop, it's made you who you are today. I know... I can tell, there was a lot of abuse in your past. I've seen it before, I've had friends just like you, who couldn't and wouldn't talk about it."

"Then you know exactly why I don't want to speak of it," he growled.

"And how do you expect me to sleep with someone who won't even share the most intimate parts of his life with me?" she shot back meeting his gaze.

A mixture of anger, pain and fear played on his face. Fear, this was an emotion she rarely ever saw from him. Was Bishop afraid that something in his past would chase her away? He suddenly pulled Whiskey away from the path and wandered off towards the hot springs. Rona halted Karinda and watched him. He didn't go far, just away enough to be out of obvious sight of the road and he started unpacking their camping supplies and putting up the tent.

Rona rolled her eyes, it was still the middle of the day with plenty of time to make it back to Windhelm, yet here he was putting up camp. She navigated her horse over to him and leapt down to help him build a camp in silence.

When they'd finished setting up Bishop said he was going hunting for a while and to wait for him there.

"I can go with you," she said.

"NO," he said firmly, "I need to be alone for a while. Just...stay put, I'll be back with dinner in no time."

She watched him leave and disappear off in the distance. An hour passed before she was completely bored out of her mind and decided to go bathe in the hot springs while they were there. The nearest one wasn't too far off so she scrawled a quick note telling him she'd be back soon in case he returned. Since he wasn't around she decided to strip naked and wash her dress, underwear and herself properly for once. The warm water was so soothing and relaxing that she nearly nodded off a few times. Dusk drew over the plains as the sun dipped under the mountains to the west.

Rona was hovering a pruned hand over the surface of the bubbling water and thinking deeply. Bishop went off alone and was being his usual gruff self at the time. He was either busy 'polishing his dagger' which is why he insisted on going alone or he was thinking over whether or not to finally start telling her more about himself. She sort of hoped it was both because she was going to have to wait at least two weeks before she could even consider giving him what he desired most from her and she really wanted to know more about the man she intended to sleep with.

She couldn't unwind at all with these thoughts permeating her mind, so she started to hum a tune before singing a song out loud to settle her nerves.

(The song is Butterfly's Dream by Erutan)

As she finished her song she stood out of the water and turned around reaching for her completely dried dress, but just as she did so several things happened all at once. First she heard the words, "There you ah-" and her eyes made contact with the dark amber eyes that were both shocked and pleased to be staring at her naked body. The word flew from her throat before she could stop herself, "FUS!"

Bishop darted out of the way, crashing to the ground as the powerful shout shook the air by him. Meanwhile Rona scrambled to grab her dress and covered herself with it. They both roared at one another simultaneously,

"BISHOP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"

"ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!?"

She picked up a boot, throwing it at him and screamed, "GO YOU PERVERT!"

He dodged it and snarled, "I didn't know you were naked! I just heard you singing and you've been gone for forever so I came to tell you your fucking food is ready you lunatic!"

Not only was she furious she was furiously blushing with embarrassment and just wanted him to leave so she screamed again, "JUST GO!"

He stormed off, leaving her to collect herself and her clothes. Her chest heaved as she pulled her dress on and she dropped onto her knees and groaned inwardly at herself realizing she'd completely overreacted to him seeing her like that. He'd seen her nearly naked on more than one occasion already, hell, he could probably imagine what her breasts looked like since her bra was sheer in the water. She felt a flood of shame both from how she reacted and to being seen naked. Dread ushered in as she walked back to the camp, ready to face him.

Rona passed by a mostly dissected elk and found Bishop sitting by the campfire biting into a piece of cooked venison. Karnwyr was nearby gnawing on an entire raw leg. Bishop looked up at her and motioned to her own plate of food. She sat down across from him and breathed an apology, "I'm sorry."

Bishop swallowed his piece of meat and grumbled, "Yeah, well teach me not to mess with a woman who can wield her voice as a weapon."

"I overreacted," she said as she tensely traced the folds in her dress with a finger.

"Yah think?" he grunted through another mouthful, "Just eat already, we'll talk after."

She nodded and dug into her food. When they'd finished Rona leaned back on her hands and stared up into the clear sky admiring the stars. Bishop was still quiet and lost in thought as he fumbled with his bow string, seemingly tightening it when all he did was break it with a loud snap! He snarled, swearing under his breath as he went to get their twine from one of the saddlebags.

Rona wasn't sure if he was still mad about what happened earlier or if it was something else entirely. She watched him struggle to restring his bow and he raged loudly when it snapped again, "GOD DAMNIT!"

He fell onto his back and groaned into his hands mumbling something Rona didn't quite catch. She leaned over and said, "Are you okay?"

He threw his hands out and said, "I can't do this! I can't talk about this stuff," he abruptly sat up and looked right at her, "I don't know how to talk about this shit Ladyship. I can't. It's just a fucking nightmare, all of it. Why do you want to know about that? About them? Every single one of them were pieces of fucking trash, not worth mentioning. Except Jules, he was the only one I could trust and even then he - "

He practically swallowed the words back down his throat at the mere mention of them. Rona looked at him with great concern, realizing now just how hard this really was for him. She held her tongue, waiting for him to say something, anything else.

He growled at her, furrowing his brows, "Don't look at me like that. I don't need your pity."

She turned her eyes away from him and spoke gently, taking care with her words, "I can tell this is hard for you."

He gave a low grumble of assent.

She asked, "Can I suggest something?" He breathed deeply and gave her a pleading look that screamed, don't make me do this. She ignored his look and said, "Every few nights I ask you one question."

"One question?"

"Just one," she confirmed, "I'll start out with small questions - easy to answer questions. And you can answer however you like, with as few or as many details as you like. You can even decline to answer a question if it's too much for you or you don't feel ready to share. Is that acceptable?"

He crossed his arms, thinking for a minute, while chewing on his tongue. Closing his eyes he breathed, "Fine...yeah that's fine."

"I'm going to ask you one question now, which you can answer however you like," she gave him a reassuring smile.

His mouth twisted before he said, "Shoot."

"What are your parents' names?"

He looked at her flabbergasted. Clearly he thought she'd ask who Jules was, but she could tell from his confused and spinning rant that, that particular question was not going to be answered easily.

Bishop shook his head, arms still crossed, guard way up and laughed. He took his thumb and forefinger and rubbed at the space between his eyes. "What are you going to do, go look them up at a library or check Imperial records or something?"

She chuckled, "No, I'm not going to bother attempting that. This is your story to tell. I want to hear it from you."

He paused and let his breathing steady, "Okay...my father," he gave a derisive laugh," Ugh, my piece of shit, worthless sperm donor...his name was Torban."

Was, past tense, meaning his father was most likely dead. Rona waited for him to give the other name. He glanced at her awkwardly and sighed heavily, "You really want to know the bitch's name? Shit...was hoping I'd never have to tell you this one...my mother, my fucking bitch of a mother...her name's Rina."

Rona was the stunned one now and laughed slightly, "Rina? Like, Rina with an 'I'?"

"Yup."

"That's why you - "

"Yes, Rona with an 'O'. Now you know, my mother was Rina with an 'I'. Rina, Rona, Runa, the most popular names for nord ladies!" he laughed harder now and said, "You know, I nearly passed you up that day when you told me your name. I was worried I'd accidentally call you Rina."

"Well I'm glad you never did!"

"Nah, you're nothing like her," he sighed, relaxing a little and letting his arms drop and laid back on his bedroll, "There. Now you know."

Rona crawled over to him and curled up beside him. He wrapped an arm around her as she lay her head against his chest.

"Sorry for earlier," she apologized again.

"S'alright," he muttered, "Guess my paranoia is starting to rub off on you and honestly, I'm glad you were so quick to react, better to be safe than sorry."

Over the next two weeks Rona got to know a little bit more about her traveling companion. She learned that he was one of nine total siblings that he knew of, though he speculated he'd had more considering how much his parents slept around. He told her about his parents' twisted worship of Mara and their peculiar ideas of love and how they lived as bandits. Even briefly mentioning that his mother claimed to have seen Mara while nursing and the Divine promised one of them true love for Bishop's soul when he was only five years old.

She learned that Torban was viciously abusive to all of his children. Bishop said he had scars everywhere from the regular beatings and although they were mixed in with his usual battle scars he pointed out a few of the deeper ones and aggressively told her what kind of object they came from before he couldn't stand to talk about it anymore and shouted, "I'm done talking!" and walked away from her.

Still, even though he struggled to tell her about his past he was slowly starting to open up to her. She was nothing but supportive, listening closely every time he told her something new, and because she never once ran away from his terrible stories he started to trust her more, giving more information than she asked for every time she posed a new question.

She could see why he was so closed off, so untrusting of the world around him. Growing up in that environment she wondered how he'd survived it at all. A few times he started to get riled up, telling her about the atrocities he'd endured as a child and to quiet him, to tell him it was okay to stop she kissed and held him. He returned her affections quickly, pulling her close and entwining her tongue with his.

There was one question he was still not ready for and she knew he'd already prepared to turn her down on it when she asked one night, "So, who's Jules?"

And he replied tersely, "Not tonight Ladyship."

She let it go. She'd already promised not to push him if he didn't want to answer. So instead she focused on the fact that her menstrual cramps were killing her. She pressed a hand to her abdomen, rubbing the place where he womb sat, torturing her with its endless contractions.

Bishop noticed and said, "Stomach ache?"

She groaned, "No...just...girl stuff."

He chuckled, "I had sisters, I know what a period is and I know yours bother you a lot."

"Really? You've noticed?" she groaned, thinking she'd hid the fact she even had a monthly period from him really well.

"You get really moody this time of the month," he said as he dug around his pack, "Not to mention there were a few times you nearly got killed because you were already in so much pain."

He pulled a bottle of potion from his pack and walked over to her handing it to her, "Drink this, it'll help with the pain," he sat down behind her, throwing his legs out on either side of her.

Rona gulped down the potion and sighed feeling a slight twinge of relief billowing inside her. Bishop then pressed his hands over her lower back massaging it. His hands felt so good, even through the fabric of her clothes. She wanted direct contact though and she looked back at him and said, "Mind getting it...directly?"

He gave her a salacious grin, "How do you mean, Sweetness?"

She rolled her eyes and undid the button on her dress, allowing it to open in the back.

"Mmm," he murmured tenderly in her ear. She felt his rough, calloused hands touch her bare skin as they rubbed forcefully against her pressing all the tight knots in her lower back.

He was too good with his hands, as he started tracing them up and down her bare back pushing out all the twisting knots she never knew she had. She leaned forward, feeling her whole body tingle in delight as he worked his way up. A light moan left her lips and she felt him breathing deeply against her ear. His hands made their way over her shoulders and he pushed the dress further down her arms. She didn't flinch, she didn't care. The massage was divine and she wanted him to keep going.

Suddenly she felt his lips on her back, he was kissing her, pulling at her skin lightly with his mouth. Goose bumps crawled all over her arms from the sensation. She wanted him to touch her more. She didn't want to have to wait even longer. Rona let herself fall against him as he ran his lips over her neck, kissing and sucking hard, looking to leave traces of him on her body.

She moaned and he groaned in response as she leaned into him. The urge to touch him where he ached most was overwhelming, but she held back. She couldn't yet. Five more days and then we can, he can...her mind went fuzzy as she twisted around to kiss him. His strong arms wrapped around her and continued to travel over her back. His tongue explored her mouth and she sucked on it, feeling him moan under her. She let go of him briefly so she could climb onto his lap, positioning herself better so that she was above him. Her dress continued drifting downwards around her body. She ran her hands across the sides of his head, pulling his mouth up towards hers again to continue their kiss.

He grasped her waist and ground his swollen groin up against her womanhood causing her to cry out. His eyes sparkled, his voice low and seductive, "Am I stirring something inside of you Princess? Desire? Passion? I'll gladly stir it some more 'til you give in to it."

"Bishop," she whispered, "I want to...I want to, but we have to wait."

He gave her a wry smile, "I don't mind a little mess Ladyship, there's a river nearby."

Her face was already so flushed that she didn't think she could go anymore red. "Five days," she whispered, "Just, give me five more days."

His brow perked up and he smirked, "Why, Sweetness, what happens in five days?"

"I'll be ready then...It'll be...safe," she insisted.

He growled low, "Ah...I see now. I wondered why you were taking your time at the caravan." To her dismay he'd stopped everything, all the teasing had ended which felt like torture as her whole body wanted nothing more than to submit to this man right here and right now. He pulled her dress back up over her shoulders and buttoned it for her, "Five days, Rona. I'll be counting."