Part 3 of 4
His desperate tone finally gets through to her. She pulls back just enough to look into his anxious face. She marvels once more at how his eyes scintillate like green fire when he is excited. She's seen this look many a time on the job but never like this. No, never like this! Her heart rate speeds back up but her mind suddenly veers off-track and something like rational thought speaks up.
Do you really want to force him to do something in public that we both know should be private? You are on a beach, in full daylight, putting on a most entertaining exhibition for anyone who happens to be watching. Her sense of propriety suddenly kicks in. Oh, god! After so many months of patient wooing, I am going to ruin everything! He will never forgive me if I…
She stills and smiles. Did he just say I could make him do it? Here? In public? Well now… that implies a certain power over him, didn't it? She pulls back a little farther and tries to slow down her breathing. His worried frown eases and he seems to relax in her arms just a tiny bit.
Her next thought calms and excites her in equal proportion. And… really… do I want anyone else seeing what I've worked so long and hard to find out for myself? No. I do not. He is MY secret. A secret about to unfold… and it is going to unfold for ME alone. No one else.
She takes a final steadying breath and smiles up at his face, his dear beloved face, looking a bit scared but ready to do her bidding whatever she decides. That he would even contemplate following her lead and make love right here in the sand gives her the last bit of strength she needs to regain her sanity.
She does stop. He looks just as surprised as she feels.
"Why… why did you stop?" he stutters, worry now blossoming where unalloyed joy had reigned however briefly. Oh, you fool! Why did you say anything? She's changed her mind!
"Because you asked me to… and you're right."
He studies her for a long moment with sorrow then whispers, "So glad to hear it. Thank you." He swallows his disappointment and starts to get up. Her arms pull him back down and he thumps back onto the sand with huge questions shining in his eyes.
"Don't thank me yet. I don't think I have the internal fortitude to actually let go of you."
He couldn't feel more confused if he tried. His senses assure him that he is still kneeling in the damp sand with a woman in his arms and the woman is still smiling. In fact, the woman is still holding him in an extremely intimate manner.
He gives up trying to make sense of it all. This whole chase down the beach had started in an act of utter madness unlike anything he had ever done in the past. Perhaps… he studies her face for long moments… perhaps he should continue being mad? OK, he thinks, let's go with that. Besides, I don't want to let go of her either.
With a final quashing of the frantic little voice urging caution in his head, he leaps into the void. His hand slides down the back of her arm and comes to rest on the hand hidden between them. He presses hard, hides his face against her shoulder, "I don't want you to let go. I can't believe I'm telling you this… but I want you SO bad! Do you hate me?"
At this she rears back a bit more, finally letting go the one bit of him that she never thought she would relinquish without a gun held to her head. Her hands come up to cradle his head, "HATE you? Richard, this is where I ask you if you want me as much as I want you."
She feels his smile against her shoulder. "Say it again," he murmurs.
END – part 3