Note to readers: Sorry for the delay and thank you for your patience! This section desperately needed a rewrite... :3 Enjoy!

Chapter Thirty-Eight

The dining room chairs were covered in white cloth, each embellished with an elegant maroon bow wrapped around the back. The tables were covered with billowing white tablecloths that matched the chairs and the centerpieces were made of an assortment of Mushroom Kingdom flowers with golden painted leaves.

The room was packed with hundreds of guests from both the Darklands and the Mushroom Kingdom. Most of the guests spoke in whispers as they stood from their chairs and searched for the seats that they were assigned. It was inconvenient and unexpected to have to move from their choice placements but it forced both of the Kingdoms' citizens to mingle. It also became apparent that their assigned seats were not segregated. Every table had six chairs, three of which were meant for Mushroom Kingdom citizens and three for Darklandians.

Bowser ignored the call to change seats and watched the princess sit in her golden chair. It looked like it had been made for her. Then again, it probably had been. He pinched himself and averted his eyes from her figure. Even the way she walked made his old habits fight to resurface. He would give almost anything to go back in time and kidnap her like the old days...

"My King, the seating is assigned. Should we find our seats?" Kamek asked. Bowser rolled his eyes and sat further into his chair.

"I'm not going to get up and thump around the room just to look for a seat that looks exactly like this one. Go find yours if you want," Bowser waved Kamek off grumpily.

"Even if your chair is at the Royal table?" Kamek asked with a smirk.

"The royal table? But isn't that where the princess is...?" he began, but a screechy voice cut him off.

"Heyyyyy, Rookie!"

Bowser turned his head and growled, "Popple? What the hell are you doing here?"

"Damn. Nice to see ya too, spikey bastard..."

"Get out of here, Duncecap or I'll..."

"Woa woa woaaaaa! Easy, pal! I was invited! No need to get all fussy, see?" the green and purple thief took out a pink letter with an official Mushroom Kingdom stamp. The invitation was addressed to 'Popple the Theif'.

"Invitation or not, how dare you show your face here after what you and those dipshits did?" Bowser snarled, curling his claws into fists.

"Look, about that whole League of Investors business... I was forced into it, see? You know I hate working with a bunch of useless knuckleheads like them, but I had no choice! If you're still sore about the whole thing, you're blowing smoke up the wrong chimney. Take it out on someone else like the Mushroom Kingdom and Sarasaland Councilors... Hell, even the Burt Brothers were all in. Pudding-headed morons - both of them. As for the invitation, it was a surprise to me too, Rookie. I guess the Princess is letting the water run under the bridge, huh? Maybe she knows that good people like me only have the best intentions at heart," the thief explained with a meaningful smile.

"I doubt that," Bowser frowned but looked in Peach's direction. His frown grew deeper as he watched a small group of former League of Investor members strike up a conversation with the princess. She wore a genuine smile as she spoke with them. Bowser looked around the rest of the room and realized that most, if not all, of the Investors were there. His stomach twisted a little at the sight.

"Forced? Bull shit. You only do things that benefit you, Popple," Bowser scowled.

"Well... it was the only way I could keep her off me..." Popple leaned forward and whispered. "The moment she loses hope in you, she'll be on my tail like a Yoshi egg," the purple and green thief explained, pointing to the right. Bowser turned his head and gave a sigh of dismay.

"Booowwwssseerrr!" a high-pitched voice squealed. Before Bowser could react, a pair of pink arms were flung around his neck and smothered him with kisses.

*chu!* *chu!* *tehe!*

"Gert erf," Bowser gave a muffled snarl and tore her arms off of himself. Birdo let go of him and gave a wiggly dance.

"Ooohhhh! It has been so long since I have seen you, you handsome devil! When Popple told me you would be here, I thought I would DIE! I just had to come!" Birdo gushed excitedly. "And look! I was assigned to this table! We are just destined to be together! *chu* Even the Princess thinks so!"

*Ahem!* "Your Ferociousness, the servants are going to be bringing the food out any second now. We need to take our assigned seats," Kamek reiterated impatiently, glancing at Birdo to make sure she had heard.

Birdo let out a loud disappointed huff and took hold of Bowser's arm, "Oh, but you MUST sit here, Bowseekins! I'm sure the guests assigned to these seats won't mind finding somewhere else to sit!" She fought with all of her might to keep Bowser in his chair but he was far stronger than her. When Bowser finally freed himself from her grasp, he grabbed hold of Kamek and took off towards the front of the room.

Kamek had been right. His and Bowser's names were sown into the white fabric of the chairs to the left of Princess Peach. Bowser's gut clenched and he began to sweat. He had been doing everything in his power to avoid her for months. Trade agreements? Give it to Kamek. Phone calls? Give it to Kamek. Personal meetings between the Mushroom and the Dark Land Kingdoms? Give it to Kamek.

Liquid dread filled his bloodstream and made him feel like he was lacking oxygen as he took hold of the back of his assigned seat. Peach turned her head and smiled up at him as he pulled out his chair. (Had her eyes always been that blue?) She opened her mouth to speak but a voice spoke up from over her shoulder.

"Ahhh! The man of the hour himself! The Princess and I were just talking about you!" a man in fluffy blue and red pants with an elegant red blouse strode around Peach's chair, took Bowser's claw, and gave it a firm shake.

"Oh?" was all Bowser could say. A pretty boy the size of an ant hill was shaking his claw like they were equals. Da hell?

Bowser looked to Peach for some kind of explanation but her face turned bright red and she turned her head away.

"Yes! You see, I am thee Prince Pine of Jewelry Land. Peach has been my friend for years. Far longer than most... Alas, I haven't seen her in ages!" he patted Peach on the shoulder affectionately. "Do you mind if I take this seat next to her? You can still sit at the table... but your servant will have to bring you another chair," Prince Pine asked with a politeness that exuded nothing but arrogance.

"Peach?" Bowser felt like he had been stung by a small wasp. How could this little dust mite use her name so casually? Unless... Bowser noticed Prince Pine's hand was lingering on Peach's shoulder. A dead weight seemed to fall from the top of his head to his toes as a thought struck him. Pretty Boy and Peach...?

After a moment's thought, Bowser noticed that Peach, along with over half of the room, was waiting nervously for his reaction to Pine's insults.

"Prince Pine... I really don't..." Peach began cautiously as if she was trying to defuse a bomb.

"Sure. It's all yours," Bowser shrugged.

Prince Pine's challenging smirk turned into a shit-eating grin. Peach frowned and made an attempt to stand from her chair, but Bowser had already left the table.

"Your Savageness... Where are you going?" Kamek whispered urgently. Bowser didn't answer. "The arrogance! The conceitedness! You aren't really going to let him take your seat? Are you?"

"If the Princess had no problem with it then why should I?" Bowser growled.

"Princess Toadstool - THEE PRINCESS - assigned you a chair next to her, your Stubbornness! She would never have allowed him to take your seat if you had not agreed! Didn't you see the look she gave Prince Pine? She was just as shocked by his arrogance as I was!" the old Magikoopa argued fervently.

"She's only being polite," Bowser glared at him.

"Polite was inviting you to the party and giving you a seat within her Castle's walls! But choosing to sit next to you was much more than that!" Kamek contended eagerly. "Even worse, that ninnyhead practically spat on you and your crown! It is unacceptable!" Bowser continued to stomp away in the opposite direction, ignoring Kamek's arguments. "My King! The Princess wanted you there! She chose to sit with you instead of Mario or Luigi!"

"No!" Bowser snarled furiously, rounded on the Magikoopa. He lowered his voice and leaned close to Kamek with a menacing glare, "She knew Mario wouldn't be here on time and Luigi would rather sit by Daisy... I was the last choice." Kamek opened his mouth to protest, but Bowser cut him off. "THE LAST. Now, sit your flabby ass down in that chair and zip your face, old man."

Kamek pulled out his chair, folded his arms, and sat in his chair stiffly. It was bad enough to have to babysit a lovesick king, but sitting at Birdo and Popple's table was going to be a nightmare.

"Ummmm... King Bowser?... Sir?"

Bowser took his napkin and unfolded it on his lap. "What?" He looked over and saw a massively obese Shyguy in a red suit.

"Well... My name is on the chair you are sitting in and... I'm reaallllyyy hungry," Gourmet Guy rubbed his hands together greedily.

"Find another seat," Bowser hissed. The massive man whimpered and jiggled away from the table.

"Good call. That guy spied and flabbed on you for weeks just because Kamella promised she'd bake him a cake. Besides, he'd steal all of our food before we could even blink," Popple stated, lazily poking his napkin with his fork. Birdo nodded her head in agreement and then rested it on Bowser's shoulder. He pushed her off yet again with a casual shrug and rested his chin in his claw as they waited for the rest of the guests to seat themselves.

*eeeeekkkkk*

"Knarly... Sitting at the same table as the Dark Land King dude," a large green frogman with a golden grown said loudly as he pulled out a chair at the table. "What's shakin' Bower? Been a long time since I last seen you!" He made pointed at Bowser, winked, and clicked his tongue in a cool fashion.

"King Wart..." Bowser rubbed his forehead. How many more people would be aggravating him tonight?

"Don't be that way, my dude! I'm not here to stir anything up! In fact, I'll make sure everyone's dreams are clear tonight! How 'bout that?" Wart grinned and motioned to the rest of the room. Bowser nodded but lifted his gaze away from the frogman distractedly. Wart studied Bowser for a moment and then followed his stare.

Prince Pine was unfolding Peach's napkin and attempting to lay it across her lap. She was trying to take the napkin from his hand so she could do it herself but he ended up winning the battle and her cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

"Ahhhh, then again, maybe one little bad dream would be fun, eh dude? I think I can nab him with a really good nightmare from here - keep him up for days, maybe even get him to wet the sheets a little," Wart suggested noisily. Peach and the Prince looked towards their table at the sound of Wart's booming voice and Bowser quickly turned his gaze to the live orchestra at the far end of the room.

"Keep your voice down or I'll make sure you eat vegetables for the rest of your life, Wart," Bowser growled from the side of his mouth. Wart paled a little and immediately became fascinated with the fabric of the tablecloth. Birdo blew a raspberry at the frogman and stroked Bowser's arm lovingly. Once again, he shook her off and scooted his chair further away.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

It felt like years before the castle servants began bringing out plates of food. Prince Pine was relentless. He asked question after question, told story after story, and tried to impress her with all of the things he had done since they had last met. Luckily, Daisy was sitting on the other side of her.

"Want me to ward him off, Peachy?" Daisy whispered to Peach as Prince Pine took a sip of water to clear his throat for the rest of his long and uninteresting story. Peach bit her tongue and tried not to smile when she nodded her head slightly. Daisy smiled and turned to Luigi who was sitting in the chair next to her.

"Hey, Weeg? Can you get me the really pretty flower from the vase in the middle of the table? I would love to preserve it in one of my books," Daisy asked sweetly. Luigi nodded his head, stood from his chair, and reached his hand out to grab the biggest flower. When he had it between his fingers he pulled it out and handed it to her with a smile.

"Thanks, babe," Daisy giggled and gave him a peck on the cheek. His cheeks reddened and he grumbled something that was unintelligible. As he sat back into his chair, he clumsily knocked Daisy's fork onto the floor with a clatter.

"Oops! I've got it!" Daisy leaned over and tried to grab the fork without getting up. It was too far away. She groaned and leaned farther, stretching her arm as far as it could go until her fingers were close enough to graze the edge of the fork. Letting out one last huff, Daisy stretched even harder and picked up the fork. With a satisfied sigh, she sat buck up in her chair and held it out for Luigi, Peach, and Prince Pine to see. "See? Didn't even have to get out of my chair!" she proclaimed proudly.

Prince Pine raised his eyebrows at her, "Surely, you aren't planning on using that?"

"Whyever not?" Daisy feigned surprise. "Five-second rule, right? Look!" She breathed on the fork and then rubbed it on her dress. "Completely clean!" Prince Pine stared at her for but didn't open his mouth to say anything further.

After a moment, Pine fell back into a long conversation with Peach and Daisy began playing with her fork absently. She flipped it between her fingers for a while and then started to tap it on the table. The edges of Prince Pine's eyes twitched whenever she gave an especially loud tap.

Soon, Daisy laid her hand on the table and tapped the spaces between her fingers with the prongs of the fork. Prince Pine continued to talk to Peach but his smile was becoming more strained. Daisy continued to tap her fork until she was sure she had more the forty-percent of his attention.

Finally, she stopped tapping the fork and began picking her teeth with it. Prince Pine tried to force himself to smile but it looked more like a grimace than anything else. He blinked and tried to keep his eyes on Peach but his stare kept changing back to Daisy's face. He was absolutely mortified by her impropriety.

"Umm... Princess, I think I..." the princess looked at Peach beseechingly but his eyes flitted back to Daisy who was studying the prongs of the fork as if she had picked something out of her teeth that had been especially interesting. His expression crinkled and he covered Peach's hand with his own. "I'm sorry Princess but I must attend to some business. Do you mind if I step out for a bit?"

"Of course, I understand! There is never any rest for Royalty. You are excused," Peach smiled at him as politely as she could. The Prince lifted the napkin from his lap and laid it on the table as he got up from his chair and bowed low to Peach, pointedly ignoring Daisy and Luigi. With a quick but graceful stride, he sauntered away like a painted pony.

Neither of the princesses decided to wait until he was out of earshot. They both doubled over in their chairs and giggled. By the time the second course had been served, both of them were finally able to speak a full sentence.

"What a riot..." Daisy said hoarsely. "We should really have Pine over more often." Peach only nodded her head and took a long drink from her glass.

The food was immaculate. The first course was a french onion soup, the entree was a Lobster Frittata, and the desert was a large and expensive looking cake. Even the orchestra was taking an intermission to try portions of the dinner.

"Thank you," Peach smiled as the castle servant handed her a slice of strawberry cake. He bowed to her and moved to the next table. Just as he moved away, her eyes caught a glimpse of Bowser as he inhaled another plate of food. Three servants watched, completely stunned by his appetite, each taking turns serving him food and clearing his dirty plates.

Anyone close enough to see Bowser watched with wide eyes as he ate ten massive plates of food and seven desserts. Peach giggled softly to herself and continued to watch him out of the corner of her eye.

"OoooOOOooo! What's so funny, Peachy?" Daisy asked with a knowing smile as she took another bite of her cake.

"Nothing really…" Peach said quietly, shifting her eyes to somewhere else in the room.

"Uhuh. So tell me, is he a good kisser?" Daisy asked bluntly.

"What? Who?" Peach asked with a blush coming to her face.

"Peach, I was there in the courtroom remember? Don't play dumb. You 'acted with romantic intentions' towards Mr. RoughEdges over there. I thought for sure we would have to surgically remove his lips off of you. Instead, he drops you off at home and doesn't even say 'Hi' when he comes to your party? What's the deal?!" Daisy pushed harder.

"Daisy… I screwed up. It is amazing he even came tonight," Peach answered, her eyes trailing back to Bowser's face sadly.

"Hmmmmmmm…" Daisy hummed thoughtfully.

"Don't do that, Daisy," she scolded her.

"Don't do what?" her cousin asked with an innocent smile.

"You 'hmmmmm'ed. You only do that when you're planning something. I can't have you playing any games during this party," Peach stated seriously.

"Peachyyyyyy, we are throwing this party to celebrate you getting well! And you would be weller if you had a little…" Daisy trailed off with a smile.

"A little what?" Peach asked with a frown.

"...Romance," Daisy answered, wiggling her eyebrows.

"No," Peach said.

"But…"

"No," Peach stated firmly.

Daisy rested her head on her hand with a pout, "Fine."

As Daisy pouted, the castle servants came bustling out of the kitchens and began clearing away all of the dishes and replaced them with fresh crystal glasses and small plates for horderves. At the request of Princess Peach, the orchestra began to play a waltz and a massive chocolate fountain was opened to the guests along with a fifty-foot table filled with every fruit the surrounding kingdoms had to offer. Even Gourmet Guy couldn't eat it all, but that probably wouldn't stop him from trying.

Luigi stood from his chair, offered his hand to Princess Peach, and led her to the dance floor. Peach smiled and matched Luigi's pace as he whisked her around the dance floor. It was almost unnatural how smooth Luigi's gate was. His legs weren't long enough for waltz but he was rather nimble. The crowd watched, fascinated by the short little man and the smiling princess. When the piece had reached its end, the crowd applauded and the guests began to make their way to the dancefloor as well.

"Wow, Luigi. You should be a professional dancer!" Peach gasped, trying to catch her breath.

"My turn, Weeegggeeee!" Daisy grabbed Luigi's arm before he could answer Peach and ran off to the dancefloor.

"...What an odd couple," Prince Pine chuckled as he came to stand next to the princess. Peach flinched slightly at his sudden appearance and forced a polite smile.

"They have fun personalities," she answered as she watched Daisy and Luigi flirt with each other on the dance floor.

"Yes, fun..." the Prince said with slight sarcasm. The edges of Peach's smile lowered a little at the tone of his voice. "Tell me, Princess, how is it that you are so tolerant and kind?"

"Practice," Peach said simply.

"No, really. Your friends are jovial enough but they lack a certain amount of... decorum. The ladies in my kingdom would never have the patience. And then being kidnapped continuously for years by an overgrown lizard. It must be taxing to live in such a way," Pine continued with a disbelieving smile.

"I actually find it all to be rather exciting. Everyday life can become rather monotonous," Peach stated matter-of-factly, entwining her gloved fingers as she kept her gaze carefully focused on the dancing couples.

"Ahh, so you have a secret fetish for torment. Is that why you always invite these oddities to your Parties, Brawls, and Kart races?" the Prince asked in amusement.

"I guess so," she said dryly, her smiling continuing to fade from her face.

"Well, at least you have taught the Koopa his place. It was about time. He has done nothing but harass you for years. To what end? I mean, did he really think he would gain anything? I was surprised he was invited to anything after he kidnapped you the first time," Pine continued. Peach didn't answer. "You know, Princess, if you ever get tired of the rabble, I'll always be willing to come to your parties."

"I wouldn't want to inconvenience you," Peach turned and allowed her gaze to fix on his.

"Any invitation from you could never be an inconvenience," Prince Pine lowered his voice and smiled at her warmly.

"Ohhh, but the ride must be so uncomfortable for you. I hear that it is hard to travel with a stick up your ass," Peach with fake worry. Prince Pine's warm smile contorted as he mauled over her words. He had to have heard her wrong.

"What?" he asked in angry confusion.

"You know, that stick... up your ass... Surely you must have known you had one? I could pull it out for you if you like," the princess continued.

"H-how dare you?" Pine hissed angrily. Peach's sweet smile turned dead cold.

"How dare you come to my castle and insult my guests?" she asked frigidly. Pine opened his mouth to argue but she cut him off. "I've had enough of you. You may leave." With a definite frown, she turned on her heel and walked away from him.

"So this is the real reason for your father's death. He died of shame when he realized he had raised a slut," Pine stated loudly from across the room, but Peach continued to walk away. "No kingdom will ever accept a Koopa kissing whore for a Queen!" The room filled with gasps and the orchestra even came to a clumsy halt. Daisy hiked up her sleeves and began marching towards the Prince but Luigi held her back. The Prince made a rude gesture towards Peach's back and left before the guards could grab a hold of him.

"Kamek?" Bowser growled.

"Yes, Sire?" the old Magikoopa set down his wine and watched the young Prince leave.

"Consider Prince Pine an enemy of the Dark Lands from now on. And, I don't care how you do it... make sure he cries."

Translation:

"Chu" is the sound of a kiss in Japanese.