Chapter 35: What do I do?

~Jarring, high-rated thoughts. Lol.

"Please, don't let this anyone know."

"No problem Tys, I won't, I promise."

"Are you two messed up?" he asked with a bit doubt.

"What are you saying; we have never been in any... "He sighed, "I hope you understand?"

"Okay, its fine, but do take care of her."

Hilary was still hearing them but she missed that part as she was distracted by her own thoughts that ran through her.

"Thanks."

"I hope you both just get better."

I don't understand this, even Max seems to know nothing about this! What is even happening!

He stood there with his head down after the blonde walked downstairs with the sigh of being not caught. He slowly opened the door and found her sitting where he'd left- satisfied that she didn't hear them.

"Don't worry, we will find out what happened, okay." He smiled.

"Hmm."

"Okay."

He went towards the balcony to get some fresh air. The sky seemed faded grey and cold as usual, but then he couldn't get any better so he walked off out of the room leaving the poor girl alone than she already was. She was sitting on the bed with her legs closer to each other, hands placed on them, as she looked down in slight sighs.

I really wanted to know what happened last night. How is it possible that I actually don't remember anything and even Tyson? I really get a scary feeling in this regard and now because he is gone, I wonder why, wonder what for, and maybe I should perhaps stop staying here. I really feel something freaky behind. Is he trying to cheat me? Tyson, if you have done this, then just listen, I will never forgive you. Hmm…

For a few minutes she tried her best to remember and memorize the things trying her best to excavate her memory but no matter even when she almost spent hours on it, nearly two, she couldn't do anything. While she did, she roamed in her room walking around, pacing from balcony to room and vice versa a couple of times randomly and each time no matter how much intricate her thoughts went and she tried to figure out the things, she couldn't dig out anything, rather her head ached. She grabbed out some sedative pills from her pocket that she had gotten secretly and put it in her mouth thinking if she could get some sleep letting her worried anguished mind regain its composure. But surprisingly it was of no use, she needed a high doze, her body was so addictive to it that now, it wasn't possible to get along with the small doze. She couldn't do anything about it, that was the last one, and maybe she could go out and buy them, but she already got a heavy fretful feeling inside her that she was trying her best to let go off.

There were many reasons apart from what happened last night to her state. She was solemnly never used to such what she was caught in right this moment. Though nothing actually that being insecure happened last night, she still couldn't make out that she had passed through a time she actually got some amatory feeling. So despite she couldn't remember anything, she could realize that something sure had happened from her side though he actually didn't get any such erotic desires, because he was, frankly mentioning, was more prudent and practical beside what he internally felt for her. That was the truth. The other thing was her drugs doses that she was addicted to that were killing her physically yet emotionally from inside in her critical period of her life.

I'm burning from the inside out, please cure me. I'm freaking very bad like I have cheated myself like nobody did, please help me out. I want to let go of all the emotions that I have failed to understand. I have no zeal for anyone. It's hard to believe but it's what I always wanted- I have said and let my heart believe that ignoring for what it felt nor did I ever asked it, but just felt the pain when I oughta. But I just wonder. Why? Why? Why? What have I done so bad that with each day passing I feel more and more hurt and desperate to get rid of everything!

Her expressions remained neutral, however, the silent tears were evident that came out. She can't deny that she had lot for both of them within her that she couldn't handle. How as she supposed to deal with two hearts though she had one?

They loved her more and more each day with their rivalry growing fiercer. She felt herself being cursed, punished for something. She just couldn't deal with it. Why everything had to become so and so complicated?

Tell me what I'm supposed to do.

Tell me what I'm supposed to cure

My heart or their hearts?

Waiting for the things never thought

In what the maelstrom am I caught?

Let this soul be drenched by the droplets of rain

Let it cure all the sores and pain

Let me face a change and nascent life

With hope, patience and maturity to strive.

With that, she pouted her lips more as the rain of her eyes continued. The so said sadly, still naïve teen wasn't aware of the intentions of last night.

She strode from her couch accompanied by more and more tears as she ran out of the room, with her legs answering her as they got weakened somehow with that's stiffened chest. She didn't care if anyone looked at her, she had decided that she was going to go away, away from everyone, away from him, away from him, away from herself, and at that point she opened her tightly closed eyes and sighed a little to calm her inside when at the precise moment she found herself to be out of the house at the dojo just when her arm collided with someone's chest.

She sighed in scary manner as if she had been out of some nightmare. She looked at him wide eyes filled with horror of being at the whim moment. He stared at her in confusion for her face was drenched in tears.

"Wh-hat happened Hil?" he asked softly still his face in fear of her state. He suddenly felt so protective of her but he knew he just couldn't show that at least after what happened last afternoon.

I thought that she was about to whine because of her face that looked terrible. I know I was harsh with her, let down emotions that nearly killed her but now I just can't stand seeing her this way.

"Nothing." She sniffed as she walked past him.

"We need to talk. Come." He said as he walked past her.

"Hmm." She nodded as she felt the need.

She followed him as they walked with slow paces yet mediocre treads. The weather was fine by this time with clear blue sky and normal coolness around. She was in need of confiding no matter who it was. They just paced with their heads down and sometimes the only sounds of their paces made them mad. Anyhow they reached the river bank they were hoping for and when they did, they took their seats on the turf that was kinda cool.

..

…

The blunette himself was much confused and he knew the hopelessness and disappointment of the brunette with her face so hurt and down. He just wished if he could go back in time and see what the dilemma had taken place at that time! However his wish couldn't be true that way. Well, anyways, after he left the dojo, he headed to the beach sitting on the cool grains of sand. The spot was occupied by a few teen girls that were simply sitting around. He sighed heavily voluntarily as he sat with his raised legs apart from each other with the feet forming an acute angle. He knew it wasn't a good position and likewise he also remembered that someone never sat that way. He only needed some pace to clear up his mind and get the cool to recollect the hidden secrets of last night.

Okay now, so no one's here. I have no brats around to mug up me and get me freaking. So just calm down and recollect very patiently what happened? Did I have any sudden hysteria? Lol. No time for jokes. Ahm-mn, I remember, we were sitting beside each other and some song was played when Max and Mariam were dancing with each other and Ray was around while Kai was leaning against his prominent wall. Well, till then it was clear. Then, a little later, the lights were back, and the song was done. Yeah, then Max and Ray gave me and Hilary some drinks and we drunk it just like they were. Then… then… then, what the hell happened! I just can't dig up my memory more. Ugh! Feh!

He passed his fingers through his hair as he got worried. He just can't understand what happened after that, and how he ended up with her.

He stood up blinking purposely to get fresh and little enlivened. He walked off the beach, briefly planning to take a walk through the concrete streets gazing around. He knew he needed to relax down and keep his cool. He periodically paced with jerks and kept his cap either in his hand or on the head. As he ambled, he took a look on the new shops he had never seen before. They were filed with people brimming, collecting articles, buying gifts, purchasing stuff and all. The streets seemed so dissimilar since he hardly visited that part of the town. It was kinda new for him. The bright yellow lights were still up as early as it was just before the sunset. He could gaze upon the postures on new movies released recently, a few teen clubs, beyblade fan club, a few beyblade shops. He took care to maintain his face a little hidden under his blue bangs so as to not catch anyone's attention, especially his fans that would run up to him for some beybattles or autographs. He had no time for that; he was already messed up with lot of things.

A little deeper he headed; he could hear the songs being played. It enlivened him as his spirit got lifted. Of course Tyson and Hilary both had a flare for music. He could identify the song that was played. It was a bit old but yeah the singer should be appreciated for her work. Yeah, it was "Stereo Love" Latune remix. He smiled as he got the aura of the intensity of the lyrics. He passed on going deeper and deeper with new songs and much high and high.

.

.

.

"So tell me, what had happened Hil?" he asked sitting a little close to her, not that she minded.

"I'm afraid I can't." she said flatly, yet in low voice.

"Okay, okay now clam down dear. I'm not forcing you at all"

She felt a shrill take over her mind as she heard a specific term she wasn't expecting.

"Hn." She replied like him.

"Alright then, tell me something, just relax."

"Okay then. I-" she thought what if she would really freak around the blunette later. Kai was quiet and quite comforting to confide in and he is the one who already confessed, is quite patient, and quite angry sometimes to make her cry, but now, the storm of afternoon didn't matter, just for right now. It was amazing to brush over the bare feet over the green lush of the grass and gaze at the clear blue sky with the slow breeze humming for her to relax.

"It is beautiful, ain't it?" she asked.

"Yup." He smiled looking at the flock of birds just passing by.

"Of course half of the problems seem to fade away when it's good around this way."

"What about the rest of half?" he softly chuckled.

"Hmmm…You are there, aren't you?" she weakly winked.

"Yes, I'm right here to hear your tales of my so called the biggest romantic rival."

"Sweet!" she said putting unusual smile over her dry lips.

She stared calmly at those amethyst eyes that gazed her with lush of smile and serenity. At last, it was quite alright.

Confiding in him didn't seem too wrong.

A/N: Hey, thanks a lot for reviewing! Send me the typos! We are done! The old readers can wait for the next chapter! It's gonna be cool! Really! Thanks a lot for waiting so much!