Chapter 39: Instant Crush~

A little later, Hilary found the courage to head downstairs and make an entry to the kitchen to prepare some coffee for Tyson and give him. Perhaps that would start any conversation. She was currently wearing a black tank top and a black jacket and her full dark grey jeans. She placed a vessel on the stove letting the water to boil for some time, meanwhile leaning against the wall staring at the glass window that had become opaque black for the night.

There was dim light in the kitchen presently and she mumbled something even she doesn't know and then her eyes lay upon a banana that was resting on the slab. She thought, when the last time she had zested her favorite fruit, it was not even a few months back. Because before leaving her house itself, she was as messed and stressed up as now or even more and so she barely concentrated on anything and her mind was on the room she would be staying in. The job she was going to undertake turned to be god's grace that it was quite a decent one and not a quite tedious job and she could perform that with little care.

While she headed to grab a knife and slice it and drip them in smooth milk and eat it, she peeled off banana and took care of the coffee aside and just like she was slicing the banana she could recall how her mother use to make for her a banana milkshake till she was ten and give her with that loving hands, she absolutely missed it but now the memories are sore, they're a pain, she just couldn't remember anything good, she was too obsessed with the dark side. With those gushed emotions, she moved her finger involuntarily when she felt a cruel cut she had inflicted on her finger. She immediately rushed to the sink and washed off the little oozed blood .After swiftly closing off the prepared coffee, she rubbed her finger blowing it softly when she was walking outside the kitchen and that's when her right arm hit slightly against her captain's chest.

She looked at him innocently. He gazed at her like he did every time and she moved back giving him space to enter inside. She was busy minding her own finger when she heard him ripping of his scarf's edge, and giving to her. She gazed at him as he gently took her finger and wrapped that piece tying perfectly and effortlessly. She let him take her finger in his soft ones and do his job gently. After he was done, she looked at him with shocked eyes and gazed at him unbelievably with that, 'how could you tear that scarf of yours just because of the little blood that came from my finger?'

He smiled.

How can you care about me so much?'

He tightened the knot

'How can someone be so soft like he was so cold?"

He caressed her finger

'How is it possible for me to allow the things to happen that aren't supposed to happen?

He left her hand

Like this Hilary, just like this.

With that, she swallowed, "Thank you so much but you really didn't need to do that."

"I need to, maybe because…"

"You don't need to care about me."

"Hn."

"Thank you so much." She mumbled softly.

"I'm not going to welcome you back."

"Huh?"

"You were already exposed to my open gates of welcome, so I guess there is no need."

"Yes." She smiled as she slightly tried to pull out a laugh and he did the same. It was a little sweet moment, without any agony or sarcasm, the pure joy though it was little.

"May I will leave if you say." She laughed.

"Sure dear."

Before she would head towards stove to pour the coffee in Tyson's red cup, Kai did that job for her, "Can't afford to have some silly mistakes done by ya to hurt ya once again." He smiled as he looked at the cup pouring the coffee. She smiled as she held her head in her hands and looking at his so rare, yet a bit frequent kind of attitude.

"So cold, yet so sweet." She mumbled.

"Here you go." He handed the cup and she headed outwards. He watched her with half smile, being glad with her little pull up of mood.

...

She headed upstairs and slid the door open slowly. He was sitting still in the same position not even changed a bit. She was a bit taken aback. Nevertheless, she headed towards him, placing his coffee on his table right beside him, which he plainly ignored. She didn't mind. If he couldn't pull off his mood, then it wasn't his fault either. She sat beside him near his feet and sighed as she looked at the sheets. He ignored again not even moving his gaze or averting towards her. She slowly got up and headed towards balcony simply roaming wherever she can and trying her best to start up some talk. He wouldn't do that. She shortly headed downstairs intending to have some talk if Max was feeling alright.

She knocked at his room in which he was recently staying.

"Yes, come in."

"It's me Hilary."

The blonde sighed.

"You don't need to say anything, I'm sorry and I'm ready to take any punishment you are going to give me along with Tyson."

"Who said I'm here to scold you?" Hilary smiled.

"Then?"

"I am just here to ask you how you are going to make up with Mariam."

"Seriously? You came here to help me?"

"Yes." She smiled softly.

"I don't know about that." He whispered.

"I hope she realizes that you weren't the one responsible for what happened."

"You trust me?"

"Of course I do, and yes I don't know why you and Ray have tricked us but I assume you sure both must have some valid reason for that and of course I'm not here to ask you about it. I don't want to make you feel embarrassed about it."

"Hilary…" he said softly looking down at the bronze floor with soft eyes as he thought about the possible mind state, "You are so kind…very very kind."

"Hey, you don't need to say that and….I'm not kind, I'm a very bad person, very bad" she said the last part in agony as she felt her inside throb all of sudden with rushing maelstrom all of a sudden.

"I hate to bring your sadness arouse Hilary. I'm sorry."

"No Max, you needn't need to be sorry, let's talk about something different. By the way, we have sat together after so many days together and we can't let our mood down!"

"Yes." The American cheered.

"Good. That's my Maxie!"

"Hehe!" he smiled, "Hilary, yes it was me and Ray who have tricked you both but there is a reason! A beautiful reason..."

"Huh?"

"Hil, you both had some distances, some complications knowing each other and building the bond that we wanted to see- that everyone can see."

"What are you saying Maxie?" she lowered her gaze as she mumbled.

I see those tears in your eyes.

I feel so helpless inside.

"We just felt you both will able to tell each other whatever you wanted that you two sure were hiding from each other and this would make you both closer."

"What?" she gasped feebly.

"Yes Hil, that's it." He smiled calmly.

"I have never been able to identify what kind of relation we actually possessed, never. I have been confused since a few months but I'm pretty sure that he knows about it, yes he does, but he would never disclose it."

"Maybe," Max genuinely smiled.

"That's why I have stopped thinking much about it, I just wanted to move on with whatever I'm having the capability to grasp."

"So have you been able to dig in your memories of last night?"

"Hmm…Yes."

"Can't believe that song really helped!" Max said incredibly.

"Your girlfriend is sure pretty intelligent."

"Hey, we are just friends, don't say that pretty messed word."

"Hey." She chuckled, "Okay fine, Maxie."

"It's not like I had an instant crush on her."

"Oh, okay." She laughed lightly.

"Well then, I will leave." She sighed.

"Sure, take care and make up with him as fast as you can." Max yawned,

"Trying pretty hard." Hilary helped out,

"Alright then, if you need any help just say me."

"Nope, I will sort out myself."

"Okay then."

...

A little later, as she was heading outside the hall towards the porch, she received a call and she picked it. She immediately recognized the voice of hell she didn't want to hear in ages. It was her mom.

She was never rude to her like she was now. She however didn't disconnected it- rather just plugged the cell to her ears.

"Hilary, it's me! Where are you!" the brunette lady shouted. The younger brunette didn't reply.

"Are you hearing me! Don't you dare ignore me! I'm talking to you!" Hilary was numb to everything. She just stared at the Koi pond.

"If you don't return home, then I swear it will be worse for you and I'm gonna give you a good punch for that. Are you hearing me!" She was still listening yet she didn't say anything and walked inside and began to climb upstairs and her mom's words were cruel enough to provoke anger in her.

"Just shup up!" Hilary finally blurted, she was still on the stairs," I'm not your daughter anymore! Don't you dare call me again!" with that she was feeling extremely raged up as she entered the room sliding it quite tough and flung her phone on the bed beside the blunette. She gritted her teeth as she headed to washroom making her red face of cross die down outta cold water . Finally when she calmed down her temper, she strode out with a 'down okay face' and her marks of her wrist suddenly ached as she mistakenly hit the hinge of the door. Slowly she slid the door again and walked downstairs and sat in the porch with her leg raised up, hugging them and burying her face in it.

Just...I don't wanna come back. These are the broken ties I can't join, I don't wanna join. I won't come back, never. Rather I would commit suicide if I can but no never!I'm done enough of everything in the house whose walls kill me if I see them even through my eyes. My heart feels like pierced with blades and stones if I remember anything such. I will never return...

She didn't cry but just blurted internally. She gazed at the midnights starless sky that was darker than dark, stronger than before. She felt a strong benevolent and altruistic aura shielding her from everything. She knew nature never left her side. Be it the fresh fragrance of soil or the raindrops, they were always there for her. They were her true companions that she found soothing or curing her in her emotional crisis. Done with that, she stood up for walking inside.

She slid the door as she walked off and climbed upstairs- her jacket- which she felt getting a bit humid or say wet. She wondered why the sudden sensation was greeting at her. Nonetheless, she remained her composure building up her stern demeanor, concealing any weakness, and therefore building the calmest aura with her.

The ingress was followed by the flutter of the sheets of bed that were pretty cream and mediocre and the wall of pure white had created the saddest silent commotion. He involuntarily shifted his undeviated gaze to her. Unlike she would gasp, he gazed at her with quite widened eyes and much deeply making her a bit confused. She stared at the starting, for a few seconds for the gazes to blend in each other. Her rubies were distinct in glimmer, light with a hint of burning flicker on her pale curtailed blanch skin in deep. His maroon pools were as profound like oceans that couldn't be seen completely. There was rapture and capture in the concealed longing of the eyes.

However, she easily broke the gaze and looked down as she courageously yet tenderly slid back the door still facing him with down eyes and then... walked towards him, keeping a few feet's distance. She stood almost tensed; yet she knew she couldn't let him stay like that for long time; she eventually needs to build up, no matter what happens.

She stood almost feebly and looking guilty for her mistrust. Her hands were down straight adjacent to her body like they were helpless and nothing more could describe her state. He looked at her with normal gaze and stood from the bed grabbing her phone that was beside him and immediately went towards her standing right in front of her.

...

I could feel the so strong presence as my gaze was still down. I could sense the strong gaze upon me as I slowly found my right wrist being grabbed smoothly and I gently lifted my face to see the perfect soul I have been craving since long. What I found was the real and softest and the gentlest rays of affection evoking from that gaze, gently curing me as they harmlessly pierced inside me. I invisibly was healed. I could make out his other hand holding something that I thought he was doing with it something as he still looked at me. Gently I felt my own phone being placed in my pockets of jeans as the sensitives of the music pulsated in the room. I could identify the song. It was the cure. I'm sure it would be the antidote, mender and more than that. I actually didn't have the perfect idea why he played "Instant Crush" but he does know that was the song I often listened and was quite attached to. I did have so much devotion towards it.

The soft starting music was started and he gently held her other hand as he started the slow dance with her. This was real, there were no tipsy anymore. They could see each other in person and feel that nothing wrong happened last night for which the brunette was more suspicious and insecure. Slowly and slowly their hands swayed across their shoulders and gently and feebly they responded at the beat with the sweetest accuracy they have been bestowed by the beats of heart and music. The starting was pretty influencing to make a flow and further with strong stroking moves.

I didn't want to be the one to forget

I thought of everything I'd never regret

Let's run with it because it's all we can take

One thing I'd never see, the same way around

I don't believe it and it slips from the ground

I want to take you to that place near the rush

But no one gives us any time anymore

When the lyrics commenced, he strengthened the moves as he held her with one hand wrapping behind her waist and continued to twirl her around whenever she was nearing and she did the same- responding-however she could. What that mattered to her was if this would help him get through his anger. He looked at her with the offense-full eyes concealed in the utmost zeal and hers were mere and were naively trying to read his. He stretched his arm as she was holding his fingers and paced back and slowly forth as she whirled along his arm. He held her perfectly with the non-tipsy hands knowing well she did knew how she on the verge on colliding with the table last night, now she was there, really there. He got a picture of the carefree dance that wasn't now anymore. He fastened the move a little as the beat lifted and the pre-chorus got right on the way. She was no more like she felt weird, rather she would feel like enjoyed later. What was most important was make the perfect moves saying everything that couldn't be said.

You used me once [?]

You made an offer for it, then you ran off

I got this picture of us kissin' in my head

And all I hear is the last thing that you said

Though she knew the song wasn't actually and moreover completely meant for them, but sure it did have a cure, a healing, painless charm that drove all the complicated distances, cleaning like something that can't be put in the words. For once she felt like this relates but then it was quite obvious it perhaps didn't. She gently smiled as she was held in the quite romantic contra body position movement and she had the trust that his strength wouldn't deny as she was held. She could see the never changed, unchanged eyes' shimmer, so much sincerity and intensity. She never knew he could dance so awesome nor she realized her own potential but when she was right here in the moment, she came back from her thoughts and looked straight at him. He gently let her stand straight and continued his composure as per the rhythm and turned her once again a little gently as the beat dropped

I listen to your problems, now listen to mine

I didn't want to anymore

And I will never be alone again

'Cause it doesn't happen everyday

Kinda counted on you being a friend

Kinda given up on giving away

Now I thought about what I wanna say

But I never really know where to go

So I chained myself to a friend

Cause I know, it unlocks like a door.

With the ending of the last verse of the chorus, he flicked her as he turned her a little swifter and let her roll back on her own. She actually enjoyed that move; she was expecting it but wasn't sure. Like she knew he would play his best moves just for now, only in front of her, she knew how keenly and adorably to return them. All they got in that dance was so much to say and so much to understand. But still what could be seen were the unfathomable gazes that were million deep.

It didn't matter what they wanted to see

He thought he saw someone that looked just like me

The summer memory that just never dies

We worked too long and hard to give it no time

He sees right through me, it's so easy with lies

Cracks in the road that I would try and disguise

He runs his scissor at the seem in the wall

He cannot break it down or else he would fall

One thousand lonely stars hiding in the cold

Take it, I don't wanna sing anymore

The second verse commenced and it was quite quenching for their hearts. The beginning line held both of them quite off guard, it was extremely deep that they didn't know what exactly move exactly to make. It was much more than their wildest dreams and above the levels of maturity. Anyway, it was just a little swaying gently of their hands with each other. The rest of the thing was finer a little and she was sure that the end the song was not yet nearing. The five minutes, the five minutes were the never ending minutes of her life she felt.

He looked like he could see through her, and most of the time his predictions against her thoughts almost were right. Slowly and slowly, they closed the proximity. With the mediocre and stereotypical moves of their hands at the level above the waist, their rippling and pacing of feet were perfect in accord. It was amazingly beautiful to watch them. The bright shine of the tube lights in his room were bright enough to make them look more adorable. A little later, she realized her chain of gushing and shifting thoughts and views about almost everything. Slowly and slowly the song neared its end and the line was that of repeating and perishing soon. Likewise, they slowed down their moves along with their legs that each time failed to touch or collide. It was soothing. It was quenching. It couldn't be described, it could only be pictured. When she realized the dying verse rise up once more, she read them in mind fathoming the possible quirky moves his partner would play upon

I don't understand, don't get upset

I'm not with you

We're swimming around,

It's all I do, when I'm with you

Those lines were a bit faster and compelling a little swifter moves and striked the beat with a little uphill task. They weren't fatigued but sure they did sigh or breathed deeply near its end. For the last time, she was held with the final contra body position as she stooped a little lower and was held perfectly.

She gazed at him perfectly like he did; this was the bittersweet end of their first dance in their non-tipsy state.

They stopped moving their bodies and stood normal, looking at each other. He was still holding her with his arm draped around her back, another hand holding her left hand. Her free right hand simply stayed by her side. The quietude turned into feeble and profound aura. They just stared at each other. He sighed softly, almost like letting out a breath. It was audible.

"Aren't you going to scold me?" she asked with a breaking voice on verge with her eyes at corner looking at his collar of jacket.

He leaned his face towards her as he spoke with the same low amplitude and voice, "For what?" his voice seemed to be breathing out through his nostrils- husky and slow. His warm breath relaxed her.

"I'm sorry." She said with her voice finally breaking and she closed her eyes tightly.

"So, now you know what happened last night?" he closed his eyes as well and was controlling his heavy breaths coming out of hurt feelings blasting across his chest.

"Hmm." She sniffed and nodded sharply.

"Now do you know how we got up that way in the morning?" he said again in the slow low tone in a cryptic blame.

"Yeah!" she chocked.

"So tell me, you really thought I did something like… so-"

"Don't say anything. You weren't wrong. I predicted 'us' wrong!" She said with tears oozing out of her eyes for shortly.

"Am I the same Tyson like I was to you before last night?" he tried to laugh though his eyes were half filled.

"Yes!" she cried.

"Then, let me do this." He smiled sadly controlling his outburst of tears and hugging her tightly burying his head across her chest. She gasped in shock. Fear and huge guilt was painful and bitter that occupied her suddenly.

Tyson- he is sobbing.

He is crying…

Why…

It's as if my soul has been cruelly taken from my body.

His voices are echoing through my heart.

His face is shaking so hard through my chest. Is there anything I can do to stop him? Anything!*sob*

She quickly wrapped her arms across his back moving them effectively up and down and pulled him closer.

"T-Tyson," her voice choked in woe, "Sweet-h-heart, p-please stop c-crying." Her voice was dangerous in cries and lament.

He cried even more and Hilary felt her own teardrops falling very fast and quickly over and over.

This was Tyson and he never cried no matter what happened. He could be hurt, cheated and done all the wrong things but he never shed tears and expressed his grief like this. This shook Hilary to worst regrets ever till now. She was feeling guilty extremely about him being this down.

"Tyson, everything is okay now. I trust you I promise!" she said in hiccups and snivels, "I'm sorry I misjudged you. I'm very sorry. I'm there for you always, I promise." She said fighting back tears once more. She just didn't know what to do to console him except that she was herself crying and soothing her palms up and down on his back.

He abruptly stopped and pulled back. She looked at him in apprehension and he was wiping his face by his fingers.

"I'm okay." He smiled at her, "Just took out my emotional wind of turmoil. Thanks."

"You are insane." She said aloud beating him on his shoulders and pouting her lips in grief.

He laughed light heartedly and pulled her in an embrace relaxing their states effectively and eventually.

A/N~ I'm sorry this chapter got a little posted late. It was supposed to be posted in evening of 10th, but somehow I thought to delay it on 12th. Again that wire connecting my router to PC got insane and needs repairing. This is really a good coincidence that I'd saved the Doc of this story in my Gmail and thus did pasting of this chapter in Doc manager in my mediocre sized phone and prof read it before posting. It's quite hard to do on phone and it took almost double time than it'd have took on PC.

And..I'm seriously going insane living in this house. I want to go out...I feel torturous and toiled up here. My own emotional thoughts go way past livid and pessimistic at times. This story has been my personal punching bag through past two years to vent out my frustrations and breakdowns. Anyway, leave the crap aside. I'm doing fine with "Breaking through the years. " I'm still not sure about its rating. Phew...

Oh, yep, how was this chapter? Thanks so much to om, Neha, guest for reviewing!. You're my constant hopes for updating. Oi, thanks to all other readers and reviewers as well. I'm not going to abandon this story ever. Don't worry. The updates will be once in a week or two. That's it. ^-^

( coc game? Hahaa, I don't even know that game, omm. I don't play it, sorry, ^_~)

A question to everyone...Do you seriously think Tyson will ever confess those three words to Hilary? Or what do you think? Will be Hilary or something entirely else?

REVIEW PLEASE!