The Friendship: part one

2012

Danai sighs, as she sits back on the sofa of her friend's tiny apartment in Harlem. He too was an actor, who was trying to make it big, and he was like her closest friend in the city, and she wanted to tell him about this new role that she was auditioning for, but she was sworn to secrecy. The only way that she'd even found out, was when she overheard one of the producers mention "The Walking Dead," which nearly caused her to quit.

She hated horror; she despised it. She couldn't even sit through most murder dramas because she'd freak at the sight of blood and guts, but for some reason, she decided that maybe God has a plan for her, and maybe she needed to step outside of her comfort zone.

As she twiddled her fingers, she decided to just ask her friend if she could borrow his DVDs, maybe even watch them at his place.

"Hey, M," she called him. His name was Mack, but he just went by M. She'd known him since they were barely teenagers, as they'd hung around the same theater circles in Zimbabwe. He was due to do a play in England, but he was the only huge fan of this show that she knew. "Um, can I borrow your 'The Walking Dead' DVDs?"

M narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

"I just wanted to watch something new, broaden my horizons...," she trailed off, shifting her eyes around.

M continued to stare, knowing that Danai was probably lying. She always did the same overly wide nervous smile, and the same heightened voice. "Sure, but I'll watch it with you. I think AMC is doing a marathon of season one right now," he said casually, switching the television channel.

Danai sat back, knowing that she'd hate this, but she had to know what she was signing up for.

5 hours later

"Have you ever met the main guy?" Danai questioned M. "The one that plays Rick?"

"Andrew Lincoln? No," M answered, once again suspicious. "Why?"

Danai continued to watch the television, her dark brown eyes barely leaving, she seemed to be in a daze whenever the blue eyed hero took to the screen.

"He's just really good," she said. "I'd love to work with him..."

"Work with him, or work with him?" M asked, with a wiggle of his thick brows and a purse of his lips.

"M, shut up," she told him, continuing on with the show, as a fire inside her burned with desire and eagerness at sharing the screen with someone like him. She had to get this role now.

"I'm just sayin', you haven't been interested in anyone since college. You just lovin' 'em and leavin' 'em, D," he said.

"I'm just auditioning right now, you know that. I've got too much on my plate to focus on getting a man," she explained to him.

"I just worry about you, you know, we been friends too long," M told her.

M was a handsome man. He was tall, dark skinned, with twist outs and a polished beard. Most people thought that he was her boyfriend, but really, he was like her family. He was always there for her when she needed him, and that was something she depended on.

"I'll be fine. Now let me finish this!"

"I'll let you enjoy your new white boyfriend," he teased, as Danai threw popcorn at him.

A few days later, and her family was in town to visit her. Currently, she was sharing a small apartment with her best friend Susan, who was a friend from her graduate program. Whenever her family visited, she got nervous, not because she didn't want to see them, but because her Aunt Mai was very traditional. She'd storm around with questions, questions that at thirty three years old, Danai couldn't answer.

It was always the same ones too. 'What happened to that young man you were seeing? Why aren't you married? Why aren't you eating? What kind of career is this?' And while she loved her auntie, she dreaded answering those questions. The truth of the matter was that she didn't want to be with anyone, she wanted to focus on her career. That was the most important thing to her.

Now, she sat in her shared apartment straightening up things that were already straight and cleaning things that were already clean, until she heard the telltale sign of the knock. She knew this knock; it was her auntie.

"Open this door, child," came Aunt Mai's stern thick African accent.

"Yes, Mai guru," she said, immediately returning to that small child who was kind of afraid of her auntie.

When Danai opened the door, Aunt Mai strode into her small apartment and sat on the sofa near the window, but her presence was formidable. In Zimbwean tradition, aunt's were regarded as mothers, and so, Danai had always treated her as such. Her Aunt Mai had a difficult relationship with her mother Josephine, as Josephine was more of a liberal academic, while Mai was a traditional woman of the house.

She didn't completely agree with Josephine letting the children pursue college education in America, where she feared that the "white man would taint them," but Josephine, along with Roger, felt that their kids should study abroad as they did, since they'd lived and worked so long there.

It was a complicated battle of wills in the Gurira household, which left Danai desperate to please them, or at least do something right by them.

"How have you been, my sweet?" She questioned her.

"I've been okay, just auditioning for a TV show," she explained, her sides sitting on the table, the show playing in the far background.

"I'd hoped you'd give up on this 'acting' thing and find a more suitable profession and position," her auntie probed, sitting back on the couch.

Mai Gurira was a proud woman, her robes always shone bright reds or golds, she never slumped in poster, her brown skin didn't crack even at sixty five. She was a majestic force of nature.

"I'm not giving up this, it's what I love to do," she relented.

"I love cows, but I am not running a cow farm, Dede," her auntie chastised her. "When are you planning on starting a family as your sisters have?"

"Tare hasn't started a family," Danai mumbled.

"You are a woman," her thick accent separated the word harshly.

"I have a purpose, Mai, I have a duty," she continued on, thinking to the blue eyed man who made her heart feel confused, as well as her unfinished plays and the organization that she was about to launch for struggling artists.

"You can't always be alone. One day, you will meet a man who will shake you to the bottom of your toes to the top of that pretty head of yours, he will unnerve you, and your spirit will be unable to stop itself," she told her niece. "It is then that you will ask me what to do, child. It is then that you will understand the plague of your forefathers and foremothers, the ones who gave you this life," she paused, getting up. "Anyways, I must go..."

"You just got here," Danai said, unable to speak.

"I'll be back with that mother of yours," she sighed, and got up, leaving Danai to her thoughts.

Two and a half months later

"Hello, there," came a smooth British accent, immediately Danai turned around, feeling the air around her crackle. "You must be Danai, I'm Andrew Lincoln," the handsome blue eyed man greeted her, she instantly recognized him as the lead character Rick Grimes.

"Oh, I - I'm Danai, yeah," she stuttered, unsure of why she was so nervous. He was just a guy, a handsome guy, sure, but he was just a guy. She'd seen a lot of those. "It's nice to meet you, Andrew."

He chuckled. "You can call me Andy, if you like. I wasn't working today, but I wanted to meet with you personally, make sure you're comforable, answer any questions that you have..."

"I don't have many questions," she paused. "I just didn't realize you weren't American."

"Don't tell anyone!" He whispered, eying the crew behind him. "Most of them think that I actually am a full fledged country bumpkin and I can't ruin my rep."

"Then why did you ruin it by introducing yourself as yourself to me?"

"I couldn't help myself, and you look trustworthy to me," he said, his eyes purposely sweeping over her body. It was the first time that she'd felt warmth all over from his gaze.

She flushed, and thought back to her auntie's words. 'One day, you will meet a man who will shake you to the bottom of your toes to the top of that pretty head of yours, he will unnerve you.'

She felt like it was where she was supposed to be. She felt like she was meant to work with him, but pushed those thoughts back. She'd never acted like this before over anyone, especially not another actor.

"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me, Andy," she winked, turning back around in her seat, but the blue eyed stranger lingered.

"You sure it's safe with you?"

"Why wouldn't it be safe?"

"Well, I don't know you. You're a stranger," he teased, which almost felt like a strange British way of flirting.

"I won't say anything, promise," she smiled at him. "Scouts honor."

"Well, if it's scouts honor, then that's the real deal," he winked, that charming smile of his making her melt.

She had to snap out of it. Sure, he was incredibly attractive, and nice, and British to boot, but she wasn't about to throw it back for someone she worked with. Her mother always told her to never shit where she ate, and she followed that rule religiously.

"Well, Andy, how do things work around here?" She asked, clearing her throat.

"This is the 'chilling spot,' also known as the make up trailer," Andy explained, seemingly unphased by the moment just before. "And in two seconds, Norman," he paused as Danai furrowed her brows in confusion. "He plays Daryl and trust me, you'll get it when you meet him. He'll come in, possibly hung over and ask -"

"Where's Cluttershit with my latte?" Norman grumbled, trudging into the room, sitting down heavily on his make up chair.

"I don't even work today, Norm," Andy said with a shake of his head.

"Then why are you here?" Norman asked bluntly, turning to see the new stunning beauty next to him. "And who are you?"

"That's Danai," Andy tilted his head, moving in front of her.

"Jeez, you already claimed her, dude? It's been one day!" Norman said.

Andy handed him a latte, and sat on the other side of her, and not once had his eyes strayed from her own. All she knew about him was what she'd gathered on Google. She knew that he attended RADA, that he was on a few successful shows in his home country, that he did successful plays, but for some reason, she hadn't dared look further. But, it was mostly her desire to work with him that instilled her deep desire to do this, to step outside of her comfort zone.

And now, she watched him as he giggled and smiled. He'd come on his off day simply to greet her, he brought others lattes, he -

There it was, she'd finally seen it, realized it, as his hand shot up to scratch his bearded face. She saw the thick, golden band adorning his finger, and it was all she saw. He was married. That was his flaw.

" - I didn't claim her, I always take time out to meet everybody new that comes, it's a thing," she heard Andy say, her mind finally joining in on the conversation again.

"Well, maybe I can take her around set, make sure she's cool," Norman insisted.

"I'm sure that's the only reason you want to do that," Andy rolled his eyes.

"It's the only reason that you need to know about," Norman winked, and then turned towards Danai with an uncharacteristically wide smile on his face. "Tell us about yourself. You got a place to stay in the A Town? I've got room at my place."

Danai gulped, tearing her eyes from Andy's ring finger. "Yeah, I'm staying with Steven until I find a place..."

"That's a good choice," Andy chimed in. "Better than this one."

"Thanks," she said, awkwardly averting her gaze away, his ring still flashing in her mind, the guilt still plaguing her thoughts. "And thanks, for being so kind."

"It's no problem, you're always welcome here," he said.

His wide smile made her feel warm all over, and she wasn't sure why. She hadn't felt this way when she'd met her last serious boyfriend, or even her last serious crush. Maybe, she figured, she's just enamored by this man who had helmed this show. She knows that she can't get involved with him too personally, considering his relationship status, but she figured it was alright to be his friend, to let him lead her, to be comforable. After all, he was a nice man.

Later on, at the apartment she shared with Steven, she was still thinking about that small glimmer of emotion that she'd felt when she saw Andy's ring and decided that since Steven knew Andy better than she did, that it was innocuous to ask about it.

"Steven, what do you know about Andy?"

Steven sat, a container of take out on his lap. He passed another container to Danai, before answering. "Andy's the nicest man ever, trust. Why?"

"I don't know, I'm just curious because he came to set to greet me," Danai shrugged.

"He does that for everyone, but it's legit. We're supposed to hang out in a few, he's bringing his wife along, so you guys can meet each other if you want," Steven paused, gauging her reaction. "But in general, he's amazing. I love the dude even if he's kind of a nut."

"Um, yeah," Danai gulped nervously. "I'd love to meet the wife."

"Is everything alright? You don't have to go if -"

" - No, it's fine, I'm just not used to being so welcomed," Danai explained.

"You're apart of the family now, we got you!" Steven assured her. "Stay as long you need, by the way."

"Thanks," she told him.

The Party

The party was in full swing at Steven's apartment, with several cast members - old and new - hanging around the relatively small two bedroom bachelor pad. So far, she'd seen Laurie, David Morrissey, a few zombie extras, and Lauren, who'd complimented her breasts in her showy two piece dress. Steven had said she didn't need to dress up, but Danai liked to. She felt like dressing up was a big part of showing up, and how people viewed you shaped their impression of you.

If you looked good, then you felt confident about yourself and people reacted to that feeling. And, as she stood in the kitchen by herself, playing with a glass of wine, did she encounter Andy, his wife Gael, and Sarah Wayne Callies, who played Lori.

Gael was a tall, thin woman, with a spiked hairstyle of dirty blonde hair. Her face was pulled into a tight frown, as she trailed behind her husband. She wore a loose baby doll top and skinny jeans, and seemed pretty normal to Danai's eyes. Not a stunning beauty, but okay, she assumed. But, it took longer than a moment for the trio to spot Danai, and when Andy did, his eyes lit up as he eagerly went over and gave her an overly familiar hug.

"Danai, I wasn't expecting you here," he said.

"Well, I am living with Steven...," she trailed off.

"Oh, yes! I forgot about that," he admitted, brushing one of his erant curls behind his ear. "It is nice to see you, and I'm glad that you let me show you around set earlier."

"I'm glad too," she admitting.

She thought back to her first full day on set with Andy, and how he'd carefully guided her around. He'd introduced her to each crewmember, looking everyone in the eyes. He'd told her funny stories, and inside jokes that the cast shared with one another so that she wouldn't feel left out, and during her first full scene, he'd stood by the sidelines encouraging her. And she knew that this was what he did for everyone, but it made her feel welcomed. It made her feel appreciated, and she was sure that he'd become her friend, someone she could trust and respect.

"And," she finally continued. "I appreciate the encouragement, the artistry, and what you're doing here."

"Our Andy is the captain," Sarah said, grabbing his arm possesively, while flashing a forced smile at Danai.

"He's a great captain," Danai agreed, while Gael stood quietly, simply surveying her.

"I truly look forward to working with you more, Danai," he said, never breaking eye contact with her.

"Andrew, I think it's time for us to go," his wife cut in. "The sitter says Arthur had an accident, I'll be in the car. Sarah, can you come with me while Andrew says goodbye to his friends?"

"Sure, darling," she told her, gripping his arm one last time before leaving.

Once they were gone, she felt the air in the room suddenly flow better. It was as if Andy was tenser for whatever reason, but now he wasn't as much. She had just met the man, so she decided not to pry. She'd never been nosey or a prober, so she left whatever he had going on alone. She would never allow herself to get involved in something like that, she'd figured at the time.

"My wife doesn't really enjoy these things," he suddenly admitted.

"That might be something that you should take up with her," Danai replied simply.

"Shit, I'm sorry. I just met you and I'm already unloading like a fucking idiot," his eyes popped open. "Excuse my language."

"It's okay," she giggled. "But I can't help you with that. I can help you with your lousy tie skills, or those shoes," she paused, motioning to his mucked up pair of dress shoes.

"I didn't have any that haven't been bled on," he shrugged, which caused her to giggle once more. "Anyways, I should go, right?"

"You probably should go," she told him.

As she told him, she felt and saw his eyes dip south towards her top, and linger there for a second longer than was necessary. She heard his intake of breath, and saw his fist clench at his side, but she didn't read too much into it.

He leaned in, kissing her cheek, and then she felt his hot breath brush her ear. "Before I do, I just wanted to tell you that you look beautiful tonight."

She felt her cheeks grow warm. "Thank you," she breathed out, her heart rapidly beating in her chest.

With that comment, he too, was gone, and she was thoroughly confused by her actions as well as his.